LoVeCrAshHeAl
by MiDoRi-KoKoRo
Summary: So a lion falls in love with a lamb... and a lamb for a lion. Forces beyond their control seem to constantly threaten their relationship...is their love strong enough to prevail? Humor, angst, and hella lemons everywhere.
1. Strange Smells and Paranoid Sisters

_A/N So here is my frist attepmt in publishing a Fan Fic. I tried to stay true to the story and what not not. Blah Blah Blah. Read It. Let me know what you think. I already have a few chapters written so if its liked I'll put them up. Side note: this story swtiches back and forth between Edwards and Bellas Pov/_

**Disclaimer: Twilight nor any of it charactes are mine. Althought i wouldnt mind it if Edward was.**

**Strange Smells and Paranoid Sisters**

**EPOV**

It's on days like these that I detest the formalities of acting like a Human Teenager. I can't even count how many times I've sat through these same classes hearing the same things over and over again, listening to the same trivial thoughts in these people's heads… but here I sit again. A junior in high school for the umpteenth time.

Instead of focusing on the math formulas I could do in my sleep (that is if I slept) I tried to figure out what that strange scent roaming through the halls was. I supposed it had something to do with that new student everyone's thinking about. Police Chief Swan's daughter: Isabella…or Bella as she likes to be called.

Finally lunch came. I sat at my usual table with my brothers and sisters. Each of us sat there with a tray of food we wouldn't touch trying to look normal. Rosalie poked at a pile of Ketchup with a fry. My sister Alice chewed her thumb looking at me. She stared at me. Something was on her mind.

"What is it Alice. ?" she wouldn't answer me out loud so I read her mind

"_Something is coming Edward. Maybe you should go…."_

I raised my eyebrow at her and at that moment the cafeteria doors swung open and in walked the Swan girl. The swinging of the door blew a breeze of her scent our way. Immediately we five sat erect. She smelled… good…

"Oh" Rosalie said out loud.

I squared my eyes at Alice- "_This? Is this the something"_

"_yea.. maybe you should go…"_

I chuckled and raised my hand in her direction. This girl was hardly a problem. She noticed us staring at her. He face flushed red and I inconspicuously gripped the edge of the table… What was with this girl. She put her head down and walked into what might as well have been the Lions Den. Mike Newton was thinking the most vulgar thoughts about her. Come to think of it… most of the guys who has seen her had some kind of perverse thought about her.. I felt kind of bad.

She was sitting next to Jessica Stanley and asking Questions about us.

"The new girls asking questions."

Emmett looked at me for the first time since the lunch hour began… "And.. what's on her mind? What weird theory has she concocted about the Cullen clan?"

I tried to listen in and got…. nothing….I've never had a problem listening to someone's thought. What the Fuck was going on?

I stared at her listening through Jessica's mind as she re-told her the façade we had been living in Forks. She must have felt me staring at her because I eyes flicked in my direction and then she stared down at the table. Alice looked at me worried.

" Are you alright Edward? You're not breathing."

I shook my head and looked at her "Yea I'm fine Alice. I left my biology book in the car. I'm gonna go it. "

Emmett shrugged "Later."

I got up to leave the table and Alice grabbed my hand stopping me in my tracks. I forget how strong she is sometimes

_Edward…go home._

I shook her off and smiled. You couldn't get anything past Alice being that she could see the future. She knew that I was only leaving so I could walk past this girl. I figured if I were closer to her I could hear what she was thinking. I wonder what she saw that had her so worried. She let go of my hand and sat back in the chair as I walked away.

I walked slowly towards the doors. Walking at human pace was such a chore. I still couldn't hear anything as I dumped my tray in the garbage. Fuck! I was only about 20 feet away. Not paying attention I dumped the whole damn tray in the garbage. I looked down…

Oh well… I wasn't reaching in there to get it.

I continued to walk and the closer I got the more my throat started to burn. This was unexpected; I'd been around humans for years and haven't felt this way in who knows how long. It was the Bella girls' scent. It was like in those cartoons where the food smell turns into a finger and beckons what ever stupid cat or dog or mouse is it in.

I stared at Bella and she looked up at me. Her face flushed red again and the muscles in my stomached tightened it stopped me from walking. _Kill her!_ My mouth pooled with venom and my foot unconsciously took a step in her direction.

_EDWARD NO!!!!!!_ Alice was screaming in my head.

I turned and looked back at my family. Only she as looking at me. I shook my head and walked out of there. In one second it all could have been over. I would have ruined the lives of my family not to mention the lives of everyone around me. I walked outside to breathe in the fresh air. I would just stay away from her.

No big deal.


	2. Weirdos and Douche Bags

**A/N So like i said, the story swtiches back and forht between Bella and Edwards POV. I hope you enjoy this.**

**Disclaimer:Twilight and its subsequent charactes do not beling to me.**

Wow, This Place is full of Weirdoes and Douche Bags.

**BPOV**

As I walked to biology, I couldn't help but think of how strangely beautiful the Cullen Family looked. They were all sitting in the corner of the cafeteria like chiseled statues. And that one… the most god awfully beautiful one… what was his name????

Edward. Right Edward Cullen.. (Okay even his name was kinda sexy) kept staring at me. When he was walking past me… I thought… I don't know what I thought… but the way he was looking at me… I felt this… this yearning… almost. Like I just wanted to touch his face… Weird

Anyway Mike Newton apparently had next class biology with me.. and he was yappering on about something... who knows.. I wasn't really paying attention. I couldnt get my mind off of Edward. Edward Cullen. Mrs. Isabella Marie Swan Cullen… Omg. A giggle escaped my lips and Mike looked at me. I guess it was perfectly timed (or at least for him it was) because Mike looked at me with the big huge grin on his face and put his arms around my shoulder.

"So that's cool. I'll pick you up Saturday at 8."

Omg. Shit! Shit! Shit! What did I just agree to? And he's got his arms around me… for fucks sake. If I shrug him off now… Damnitt… oh well

"Ah yea Mike that would be fine." Ill make up some excuse later.

We reached the biology room and it smelled of well… A biology room. Musty and a fan was blowing. I walked up to the teacher and followed him to my seat. He seated me next to… Omg…Omg …Omg… It was him. Edward. Edward fucking Cullen.

I could feel my face turn red. I was so embarrassed. I had been thinking of him since he walked out of the cafeteria. Good thing he couldn't read minds because if he could…

Then I looked at him. He was staring at me with this disgusted look on face. His nose turned up in the air towards the window… but I hadn't even spoken to him yet.

He turned away from me covering his nose with his hand and moved to the furthest side of the table.

Did I smell bad or something? I turned my face to the side and inhaled deeply. Vanilla. As usual. Nothing unpleasant about it. Besides I'm sure if there was Mike would have noticed and wouldn't have asked me out… If that's what he did.

The teacher walked back to the front of the class and started lecturing on mitochondria or something. Who knows? I could feel Edwards gaze piercing through me. I looked at him for a brief second afraid of what I might see. He had this smug look on his face. It was like I was intruding on his space or something. I shrank away in the chair. If he wanted his space I'd rather sit in the damn aisle than to have to deal with this crap.

He kept staring though. I was getting annoyed. I looked around the classroom to try and make it seem like I hadn't noticed. Maybe he would turn away from me if I didn't acknowledge his obvious staring. Finally I gave up and stared down into the text book.

His chair squeaked catching my attention and I could help look over and there he was.. staring in my face slightly closer than he was before. I couldn't turn away. Our eyes were locked and it was like time had stopped. My breathing became erratic as I stared in to his dark brown eyes. They looked almost black. His lips could have been glued shut. I felt myself leaning forward into him

What the hell was I doing _TURN AWAY! TURN YOUR HEAD STUPID! _I mentally yelled at myself but my body had a mind of its own. He was staring down at me with this intent look on his face. God he was sexy. I had stopped breathing and felt a burning in my chest from lack of air.

Then the bell rang. He sprang up. My hand grabbed the table as I fell forward and looked up expecting to see him standing there looking at me like the idiot I was. He wasn't there. My chest heaving I looked towards the door and there he was walking out.

How the hell did he get there so fast?

My head hurt.

What just happened? Seriously. What just happened?

I thought I was gonna jump him right there in the middle of the class. Tear his clothes off. Ravage him in front of a room full of people. All of whom probably know my father personally. What was I thinking?

I picked up my books and walked out. As long as no one else saw what just happened then I didn't care. I would forget it. Never look at him again. Ignore his presence and the strong feelings it forced me to have

No big deal.

The rest of the day went by without incident and apparently I had agreed to go to the movies in Port Angles with Mike on Saturday.

As I walked out of the school to my car I could see that the rain wasn't letting up. I was about to take out my umbrella when suddenly there was no rain falling on my head. I looked up into a cloud of leopard print and red roses. Standing next to me was a little dark haired girl. She was even more beautiful up close.

Her skin was pale white and flawless. Her eyes a beautiful topaz color. She had on the reddest lipstick ever.

"Hi Bella! I'm Alice. Alice Cullen. Welcome to rainy Forks" Her voice was like angels singing. I was kinda stunned for a moment. But it was her smile that got me. It was so warm and friendly. So unlike her brother.

"Um hi. Hi Alice." I staggered out. Did all the Cullen's have this dazzling effect on people?

"Would you like me to walk you to your car? It would be a shame to get your pretty hair wet. And oh you smell so nice… Is that Warm Vanilla Sugar? Its one of my favorites.", she asked as I pulled out my umbrella. She was friendly but she talked a mile a minute. Oddly enough I felt comfortable with her. Like we were good old friends.

"Umm sure… it's the big red monstrosity over there." I pointed at my rusted red pick up. "Well mostly red." She laughed and I smiled at her. I couldn't help it.

And then I felt the rain again. I looked up to see Edward staring at down at us. Glowering at us like we were two teenagers caught by the principal smoking pot.

"Let's go Alice. I'm sure Isabella has her own umbrella."

He pulled her away from me and I was left standing there with my mouth hanging open. Did he hate me that much that his sister had to hate me to. Alice looked back at me and called over her shoulder, "Sorry Bella. Ill see you tomorrow", as Edward dragged her away.

He turned and looked back at me himself. I wanted to look away but his face.. he looked. Sorry.

Douche Bag, I mumbled under my breath as I ran over to my car. I slipped as I reached the handled. I had to remember running wasn't exactly my forte`.

**A/N I decided to let Alice into the story to give Edward a push. **

**Please Please Please leave reveiws or suggestions or just say hi. I wanna know if people are reading this and if theres anything you wanna see happen let me know....**


	3. Stupid Immature Meddling Family

**A/N. Here's another chapter. Please review. let me know what you think. I tried to add a little humor in this one so yea...**

**Disclaimer: Twilight = not mine**

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Stupid Immature Meddling Family…

**EPOV**

I already knew it. This would be the car ride from hell. I could already hear all the things Alice was thinking to say to me. Every bad name in the book. Cursing the grave I didn't have.

"EDWARD! You had no right. Now Bella's gonna think I'm just a rude and obnoxious as you were."

Jasper looked at me with suspicious eyes. He grabbed Alice into his lap in the back seat of my Volvo. "What did Grandpa do to you baby?" God they grossed me out sometimes. In fact my whole family was that way. Especially when it was warm out and we were all stuck inside… Thank God for Bose Surround sound….

"Well" Alice said glaring at me… "I _was_ trying to walk my new best friend Bella to her car so she wouldn't get wet but this one" she pointed her thumb in my direction "so rudely pulled me away."

Rosalie starting laughing. "Oh she's your new best friend Alice. You spoke to her for all of two seconds."

"I couldn't have said it better myself Rose." We high five'd each other then she slapped Emmett's hand that was grabbing her right boob from the back seat. See gross. I told you.

"Well excuse me for trying to be friendly to Edwards's new girlfriend." God I wish she hadn't of said that. Immediately a roar of laughter erupted in the car. Emmett with his big grizzly self started hollering "oh yea" and humping the back of Rose's seat. I suppose if I could blush I would have..

"Alright Guys enough! Alice what are you talking about. You saw me… I wanted to kill her. I was sitting in that damned class room ready to rip her fucking throat out." All the laughter stopped. You could have heard a pin drop on the carpet in my car

Rose looked at me. "Oh god ... Edward... Really." We had all been through it. That murderous craving for a human's blood. But we were so good at controlling it. "Damn bro." Emmett said. He leaned back in the seat. Calm. For once.

Alice mushed the back of my head from the back seat. "Yea.. but you didn't. You wanted to do something else to her. Did you think I wasn't gonna keep an eye on you. If that bell hadn't rang when it did… lets just say I don't know how you were gonna explain that one to Carlisle or her dad for that matter"

I looked in the rear view mirror at the smirk on Emmett's face. He looked at Alice and then at me. "Pitchin a tent in biology class Ed… how very human of you. Good job buddy." He slapped my arm hard and I purposely swerved the car to shake him back into his seat.

"Alice… I don't know what you are talking about"

But I did. When she looked at me. The way he eyes locked on mine. I hadn't meant for that to happen. But I saw it. I saw what every other teenage boy in that school had seen. Her perfectly pale skin... almost as pale as mine with a flush of red in her cheek. Those open chocolate eyes. I was almost falling into them. He perfectly red pouty lips. I could smell the blood in them. Just thinking about it sent a rush of venom into mouth. I swallowed hard. And then the strangest thing. This other tightening feeling I was having. Only this one was lower. I shifted my weight in the seat and was thankful when the door to our garage went up.

Everyone piled out of the car and Esme our mother (for all intensive purposes) stood at the top of the stairs with a baking pan of oatmeal raisin cookies wearing an apron. She had the warmest smile ever. Much like my real mothers which was why I was probably so close to her. She knew we wouldn't actually eat the cookies but she liked the way they made the house smell. Emmett walked past her kissing her on the cheek and grabbing a cookie off the tray.

"Thanks Mom." She smiled so big when he acted that way with her. Although Emmett was the biggest and physically strongest out of all of us, he had this boyish charm that made Esme melt. He really was such a big kid that it was hard to stay mad at him even when he broke shit in the house. Although he was older than me in human age he was very much my little brother.

We all piled past Esme and gave her our various affectionate greetings. Alice stopped and gave Esme a big hug. Her face was so close to her ear and she was hugging her for way to long. I knew what she was doing. She was telling Esme about Bella right in front of me but I was to late in trying to get into her head

_This is the song that doesn't end… yes it goes on and on my friend… some people started singing it…_

Damn her. I gave up. I did not want Lamb Chop stuck in my head all night.

I could see Esme's eyes light up when she looked at me. I gently hugged her pecking her cheek and god bless her heart she said nothing. She just smiled and I could have sworn she had a tear her eye. If any of us had had the ability to cry it would be Esme.

Thankful for the peaceful night that was ahead of me I went upstairs to my room and flew through the menial homework that was due the next day. Again these human formalities were so bothersome. I couldn't how ever stop thinking about Bella. Bella, My Bella. My sweet innocent Bella who was going on a date with Mike Newton on Saturday with no idea the vile things he was thinking about her. It dawned on me. I actually felt jealous. And didn't help that I couldn't hear her thoughts. That was a mystery all on its own.

Wait a minute. What was going on in my head? How had I let my thoughts run away with me like that? I walked over to my stereo in effort to turn some music on to distract me… I wanted to listen to anything that was far from my thought so I turned on Pinback and opened one of the doors in my room hanging my legs off the side of the house. The cool breeze coming in relaxed me and I cleared my head. I could hear only the faint whispers of my family in the house. Emmett and Jasper arguing over video games. Alice doing ballet in her bedroom entertaining Esme. Rosalie working on her car. I closed my eyes and just sat there doing nothing. Doing nothing but thinking about Bella and the various cravings I had for her. Bite her…kiss her… kill her…love her…

When I opened my eyes (which very well could have been hours later since I didn't hear any music playing) Carlisle was sitting next to me. He was tossing a ball up and down in the air.

"Wow for a second there I thought you were actually asleep. I was about to ask you for your secret." If one were to wish for a Father there was none better than him. He an Esme were perfectly matched and it was at time like these I was grateful for our immortality because they would have never met had it been otherwise.

"Hey Carlisle. What's up?"

"Well I just spoke with Esme. She told me about this new girlfriend of yours."

I had to stop him. "She's not my girlfriend Carlisle. In fact I'm sure she thinks I hate her." He looked at me with the warmest eyes. He wanted so badly for me to have what everyone else had. Someone to love.

"Well Alice told me everything and I know you Edward. All I'm saying is please be careful. I wont intervene unless its get dangerous. I want you to be happy. No matter what you choose I will support you all the way. "

"You know Alice's visions are subjective. I have no intentions on pursuing this girl." My voice cracked when I spoke and somewhere deep inside I knew I didn't mean that. I wanted her.

"Yea I do know that. And I can also hear in your voice that you've already made you decision on that matter. Maybe you and Emmett should go hunting before school tomorrow. Or I could go with you if you wanna talk about anything." He stood up putting his hand on my shoulder. I looked at him. Somehow I knew he was right. I couldn't deny that my desire to BE with Bella outweighed my desire to drink her blood. There was something magical about her.

"I'll go find Emmett." I didn't really feel like talking about it and knew that all I had to do was suggest a wrestling match and I'd hear no words about Bella. My Bella.

"You know I had really hoped you and Tanya would hit if off. I guess she's to "extra" for you."

"Extra is an understatement. She's a walking, talking, blood drinking blow up doll"

Carlisle laughed his good humored laugh and walked out of my room. Even he couldn't pass up the opportunity to make fun of my "innocence". Esme on the other hand was delighted.

I shook my head again and headed down the hall to find Emmett..

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**A/N I wanted to show some family time to show how close everyone is. I didnt feel enough of it in the original story. **

**Please leave reviews questions comments or just say hi. Let me know what you think so far. Im building up momentum to a big scene.. so let me know if there is somethin you wanna see happen and ill try to write it in.**


	4. Awkward

**A/N Heres another chapter. Im trying to move the story along to get to the juicy parts which at that point i will leave you with a cliffie....I get what i want you get what you want and that kissy face, roman hands, and Bella wearing almost nada..oh and tea... cant forget the tea....**

**Disclaimer: Oh i wish I really had of written Twilight, that is what i really wanted to do, But S. Meyer beat me to the punch.. boo hoo, boo hoo, boo hoo**

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Awkward……

**BPOV**

His golden brown eyes locked onto mine. His lips were slightly parted. I had never been this close to someone this deliciously sexy. And he was moving in. He was going to kiss me.

His arms were stretched out on each side of me pressed against the lockers preventing me from moving (not that I would have). I looked deep into his eyes and turned up me face so he could have better access to my lips. He moved in so slowly I thought I would die with anticipation. Finally his lips pressed onto mine and in a second one arm wrapped around my waist pulling my lower half to him with a sense of urgency. He pushed off the lockers only slam me back into them while his hands gripped onto me. He didn't break the kiss once. He exhaled heavily through his nose and I was instantly dizzy. His mouth moved down to my neck and I turned my head sideways pulling him closer to me by the sides of his shirt. Edward I whispered….

Faintly I heard someone calling my name. It was distant and I tried so hard to ignore it. I didn't want anything to ruin this moment.

"Bells come one. You're gonna be late for school if you don't get up now. Bella!"

I moaned into the pillow. I was gripping it so tightly my fingers actually hurt. Damnitt. I had been dreaming. Dreaming I was kissing Edward in school. "I hear you Dad. I'm up" I dragged myself angrily into the shower… 5 more minutes. That's all I needed.

I arrived at school with an unexpected surprise of Mike Newton waiting at my locker with a breakfast burrito and hot chocolate.

"Morning Bella. I thought you might be hungry so I got us breakfast on the way." Dear lord he was already referring to me and him as an us… Let him down easy. "Thanks Mike but me and Char-I mean my dad ate breakfast this morning. I will take the hot chocolate though."

He handed me the hot chocolate taking my books out of my hands at the same time. There was that feeling again. That someone was watching me. The Cullen family walked past. Edward was staring again. What's with this guy? Alice was the last to walk by.

"Morning Bella!" she smiled at me the same way she had yesterday. Okay maybe she didn't hate me. She walked over and Mike Newton took a step back with a look of surprise on his face. Was it really that odd that the Cullen's should speak to anyone?

I looked from her to Edward who didn't so much as look my way and smiled at her satisfied that he wouldn't interfere this time. I didn't have many female friends and Alice seemed really nice

"Morning Alice!"

"Chilly out today isn't it. Oooh is that hot chocolate?" she smiled eyeing the steaming cup in my hand. "Uh yea you want a sip. Mike bought it for me?" He flashed a smile at her. What a dork. "Oh, no thank you Bella. I'm allergic to chocolate but that's so nice of you to offer." She turned to Mike and I couldn't see her face" "And that was very nice of you Mike to buy that for her… how considerate" Again he took a step back from her. Mike really was weird.

"Oh Bella, I wanted to apologize for my brothers behavior yesterday in the parking lot. Edward gets a little cranky when he's hungry and our Mom was making his favorite dinner last night so he was kind of in a rush."

"Oh its no big deal, It wasn't you fault." I looked off in the direction Edward had walked in. Was that it? Was he just really hungry?

"Well I have to get to class. I'll see you around okay." She smiled her friendly smile at me again and for the briefest second grabbed me in a hug and walked off.

Mike just looked at me and started talking about the movie we would be going to see tomorrow. I had no real plans on going so I didn't really listen to him.

**EPOV**

Alice came skipping up behind while I was at my locker. "I hugged your girlfriend. I hugged your girlfriend." She stuck her tongue out at me and Emmett laughed. I looked at my family. How was I supposed to do what I was planning on doing with these four idiots getting in the way. I wouldn't humor her. I took out my books and we all went to class. If I said anything it would just encourage her to keep going

I had AP Calculus with Emmett. Last night out hunting Emmett, in rare form, agreed to not harass about Bella when we were alone. We talked about my feelings. But you know in a manly way. Mike Newton happened to be in my calc class as well so I was subjected to listen to Newton think about all the dirty things he was planning for My Bella on Saturday. How could I get her out of that?

I leaned over to Emmett "this Newton kid is more perverse than you". Emmett laughed. "Want me to knock him over?"

The class was about to end and I wanted to chance to speak to Bella without the Newton kid around. I excused myself from class and Emmett just looked confused. But then again that wasnt hard for him. Emmett was usually in his own head thinking about sex with Rosalie, sex with Rosalie, or fighting bears.

No one was in the hall so I took it upon myself to move at my normal speed and waited outside her class for her. The bell rang and out barreled a group a students and then into my chest she damn near fell. I caught her in my arms before she cracked her skull.

"Oh Edward!" she had dropped all her books right on my feet. I bent down to pick them up. She was so beautiful and smelled just as good. I took a hard swallow. No venom. Bad venom. I didn't take my eyes off hers and she didn't take hers off mine.

"Sorry Bella I didn't mean to startle you. I just wanted to apologize for the way I behaved yesterday. It was really rude of me and I'm very sorry." I went to hand her back her books but thought otherwise. If Newton was smart enough to carry her books to class what the hell was I thinking.

"Um it's okay Edward. Everyone gets really hungry sometimes I guess." She smiled at me. And it was like the sun came up in the middle of the damned hallway. I smiled back at her. "May I walk you to you next class Bella. It's the least I can do"

She looked a little shocked. I didn't blame her. She had been told that I didn't speak to girls and here I was offering to walk her to class. Well she should feel special.

Out of now where Bella's books went flying from my hand. Staring into her eyes I hadn't even notice Newton come up and grab them from me. "Thanks for picking up Bella's books Cullen. That was real nice of you." Was he actually challenging me? I snatched to books back from him

"No problem Mike." He snatched them back from me and from the corner of my eye I saw Bella's face worried as her head moved back and forth watching the exchange. Behind him I saw Emmett walking up.

"Everything okay here Edward?" _Cool it man. _He was saying in his head.

I could see a crowd was beginning to form and Bella clearly embarrassed shrinking back in the lockers behind me. Mikes face was flushed with anger and at that moment I would have liked nothing more than to drain his blood for him just for pissing me off.

I looked at Bella behind me. "Rain check on that walk Bella. Ill see you later. I knew Mike was known for randomly picking fights and would have no way of explaining how he broke his hand hitting me so I stepped out of his reach before he had the chance and he wanted to.

Looking back over my shoulder I saw Bella take her books from him. She was clearly upset. Through Mikes mind I could hear what she was saying:

_What the hell was that about? If you're going to walk around here acting like you own me after only a day I don't know what we should hang out on Saturday. Im gonna have to cancel Mike. You guys looked like you were about to fight and I don't wanna have anything to do with that._ A smile crossed my face. Mission accomplished.

My next class was with Alice. I walked in and sat next to her. "So what are you gonna buy Bella for lunch today?" She had foreseen that I was gonna offer to buy her lunch in effort to apologize for my behavior. At that point I changed my mind and she frowned. "Well Im still gonna go sit with her and there's nothing you can do about that."

Do what you want I told her.

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**A/N OOOH Mikes got some kintama's (balls).**

**Leave me love. I will keep posting chapters until i get to my cliffe which is comin up real real soon.**

**Also keep watch out for my Inuyasha story that should be up soon. Whole different genre i know but is chocked with lemony goodness.**


	5. Knight in Shining Armani Armor

**A/N We're almost at the cliffe... im gonna be away for a few days so if i get enought lovin from you guys i shall continue. My stroy will commence with is lemony goodness and you'll think you're drinking lemon drop shots.....lol... you know because takin shots is supposed to be fun and crazy.. also because enough of them will make you do what im about to write about soooo**

**Disclaimer: You can look inside my mind all you want. You will not find the origins of Twilight there... No no you wont**

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**My knight in shining Armani Armor**

**BPOV**

Instead of going to the movies with Mike I ended up at a hair salon with apparently my new bestfriend Alice. After the little tiff between Mike and Edward, Alice was practically glued to my side. She let me in on Mike reputation for being a trouble maker and I was actually kind of grateful that the little incident occurred. The last thing I need was drama starting around me my first week here.

Not only was Alice and awesome friend but it gave me the opportunity to be around Edward more. It was still very…whats the word…intense when he spoke to me, but I was getting used to it. I got a chance to meet the other Cullen kids and they were all pretty nice. Jasper, Alice boyfriend was the quietest but he was nice none the less.

The Spring Fling was coming up and Alice was all excited about it. She told me that they had never had any interest in going to school dances but since I was new to the school she wanted to go with me. So he I was spending the day in Port Angles roaming around a mall shopping With Jessica Stanley and Angela. Angela was the only genuinely nice girl besides Alice that I had met and if I had to put up with Jessica to hang out with her than so be it. Angela had confided in me that Jessica had been harboring a crush for Mike for a while so that's why she didn't take to kindly to me. But something in her tone when she spoke about the Cullen's led me to believe Edward probably had something to do with it. I often switched off sitting with Alice and sitting with Angela and on the days I sat with Alice, me and Edward would walk to class together. He even went so far as into holding my books and pulling out my chair for me. He was for lack of a better way of putting it…gentlemanly.

On the day of the dance I agreed to meet up with my new friends at the school. Walking down my stairs I felt like I was doing the walk of shame. Charlie was standing at the foot of the stairs with a big grin on his face and a camera in hand. Alice had come over earlier to do my hair and makeup. I admit I looked nice but he was making a big deal out of it.

"You look beautiful Bells. Just like you mother"

The look in his eyes when he mentioned my mother was always so sad. I wondered if he would ever get over her leaving him. I let Charlie take my picture and upon leaving I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror. I looked nice. Tonight was gonna be the night. I was gonna make a move on Edward. Alice was all but telling me to. I laughed to myself. Who was I trying to kid. He could say it himself and I would never have the balls.

I arrived at the tackily decorated gym and met up with everyone. It was fun I'll admit. They played a great mix of music. I danced with Alice, Angela and a few other friends I had made. But not Edward. Edward had decided last minute not to come. It was hard to hide my disappointment but I wad committed to having a good time without him.

It had started to get late and I was getting tired. I told everyone I was going home and even though Alice was disappointed she let me go. She was grinding with Jasper on the dance floor and Im guessing she was having to much fun.

I walked out of the school and it had started raining. I was getting ready to make a run for it when arms grabbed me from behind. I screamed with surprise and turned to see Mike staring at me. His eyes were droopy and I could smell alcohol on his breath. Oh boy here we go I thought.

"Bella" he was stumbling on to me and his speech was slurred. "You did dint dance wif me awl nite. Why not?"

I attempted to push him off me but he was drunk strong and wouldn't budge. "Because I didn't see you Mike and besides Jessica likes you and she my friend."

"Well Dance wif me now Bella. Now" Mike started twirling me in a circle and tripping me with his feet. We went tumbling down to the ground and he landed on top of me.

"Get off me Mike God."

I could feel the cold air on my elbows and knew that I had scraped them.

"Oh well Bella. If dats what you wanted all you had to do was ask me baybee" with that Mike pulled me up off the ground into his arms and pushed me up against the wall. I thought back to the dream I had of Edward weeks ago. This was sooo not the same thing. Mike went in to kiss me and I turned my head so he ended up kissing my hair

"Mike seriously get off. You're drunk".

"Im not drunk you stupid bitch! You're just a cock tease is all but ill show you."

Mike wrapped his hand over my mouth and pulled me towards the parking lot. The heel of my shoe broke and I stumbled falling to the ground again. For the second my mouth was free I screamed for him to get off and that's when he punched me right in the face. My head went back and I was literally seeing stars.

Mike pulled me back up towards his car when out of nowhere I was being pulled backwards. Mike let go off my hand and fell on his ass. I looked up to see that it was Edward with his arm around my waist. He was holding me protectively at his side glaring at Mike like he would kill him. I couldn't tell at what point I had started to cry but I turned into Edwards's body and he held me tighter. I had never felt so safe. I felt like nothing could ever touch me in his arms.

Mike got up and went to push Edward but Edward pushed him first and Mike flew- and I mean flew – backwards into his car. He started to get up again and the anger I saw on Edwards face scared me. I was afraid he would actually kill him.

I heard footsteps running as I saw Edwards brothers and sisters coming towards us. Edwards pushed me into Emmett's arms and he caught me gently (which was odd if you could see what he looked like.) Mike lunged at Edward again and to me it looked like all Edward did was touch him. He went flying into the car again. Everyone had the same horrified look on their face. Mike threw another punch at Edward and this time he growled. It scared the ever living shit out of me but at the same time I had never been so turned on in my life. I could feel body heating up in rain watching him and looked up to see Emmett smiling at me. I had no idea why.

Edward pushed Mike up against his car and cocked his fist back to hit him. Jasper stepped up and grabbed his hand. He looked like he was having trouble holding him back and he called for Emmett. He let me go and I stumbled forward and at that moment Edward turned around to look at me. His eyes softened and he let go of Mike. He and Jasper stepped back . Mike took this opportunity to try and jump on him but Edward was to fast. It was as if he knew Mike was going to come back. He pushed Mike against the car again and before anyone could react he put his fist through the window right next to Mikes head. It shattered. He lifted Mike off his feet with one hand and dropped him to the ground. Mikes fear was frozen on his face. Edward picked him up again with one hand and got real close to his face.

**_"Don't ever fucking go near her again or next time that will be your fucking face!"_**

He pushed Mike towards the broken window and was in front of me and Alice who at this point had wrapped her arm around me. I don't know if it was just my hit on the head but it looked like Edward was move inhumanly fast. All of this happened before anyone else from the dance had heard the commotion and came outside.

He grabbed my arm from Alice and held me protectively against his chest. All this tossing back and forth had me feeling dizzy.

"How could you let this happen Alice? He was in her face yelling at her. Jasper stepped up to her side and took a step toward Edward but Alice pushed him back. "Im so sorry Edward. Im so sorry. I didn't see…I couldn't…I wasn't paying…. Im so sorry."

"Sorry isn't gonna cut it Alice. Look at her face."

It was then that I felt it. I felt like someone hit me with a hammer. My cheekbone felt broken. I brought my hand up to my face but he moved it out of the way and put his hand on my cheek. I looked up at him. His hand was so… so…cold.

"Are you alright Bella?"

"Please don't be mad at Alice. It's not her fault. I shouldn't have come out here alone and I should have been able to…"

"Shhh. It's okay Bella." He looked at Alice who looked like she was going to cry. "Im sorry for yelling at you Alice" he then nodded at Jasper who nodded back.

"Rosalie please call Bella's father and ask him to meet us at the ER once he's done with this scumbag. Im gonna take Bella to see Carlisle to make sure she's okay."

"Sure no problem Edward." People were starting to walk over. I looked back to see Tyler was holding Mike against the car. I guess no one want him to get away.

"Im so sorry Bella. I should have gotten here sooner."

He was pushing me towards his car . I looked up at him. He looked so angry yet guilty at the same time. He sat me down in the front seat of his Volvo and got in on the other side. I don't know how he got around the car so fast but at this point I didn't care. I was getting dizzy.

It was almost as if they knew something bad was going to happen.


	6. I Did My Best

**A/N: So this is the last chapter Im putting up for a few days... its my cliffe...Admittedly its a little drawn out... a filler scence if you will but wait until you see where it ends up...**

**As i said before review and stuff cuz that'll make me happy and make me make you happy. Help me help you. Help me to help you. Btw.. i make reference to many song and jokes and stuff. This title happens to be a reference to a Dane Cook joke... **

**Dis claim er: I dont mean to Dis the original story, nor am i claiming it as my own...**

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I Did My Best

**EPOV**

Anger was coursing through my body and I felt like I could tear the world apart. How the fuck had Alice not seen this coming? Was she that focused on dry humping on a dance floor full of teenagers that she couldn't do her damn job? Okay I was being unfair. I had dropped the ball too. In feeling so overwhelmingly protective of Bella, I barely let her out of my sight. I snuck into her room and watched her sleep at night. I trailed behind when she went out with Angela… I mean she is like a new born deer. She's so clumsy and accident prone in an (endearing way of course). I just wanted to make sure she didn't get hurt.

And then this happens. He hit her. He was going to rape her. If I wasn't so afraid of scaring her off and exposing us I'd of ripped his throat out right there in the fucking parking lot. Danced in his blood. I looked over at Bella who had her face pressed against the window no doubt because it was cold. She hadn't said a word.

"Bella are you okay. I mean I know you aren't okay but are you okay?" Alright that was redundant. She looked at me with her eyes wide open. I didn't realize how angry my voice sounded. Attempting to soften it I tried again. "Bella, are you in much pain?"

She was looking at my arm. My arm which should be covered in glass and blood but wasn't. "Your arm? Its. Its okay?

Damnitt. Why had I put my fist through the window? Why couldn't I think straight anymore. "Yea Im fine Bella." I tried to put on a light voice. "You'd be surprised how thin the glass is on a Kia, my fist didn't even go through it. It just shattered underneath my hand." I looked hopefully at her. Come on buy it. Buy the lame story.

"Oh"

"Anyway im taking you to see my father to make sure you're okay. Your father should be meeting us there. Im sorry Bella. Im sorry I wasn't there to protect you. I'm sorry this happened to you."

"Its okay Edward. You did protect me. I don't even want to think what would have happened if you hadn't shown up when you did. Besides its not like there was any way for you to know something like this would happen right?"

The way she said right…there was something wrong. It was like she was asking me.

"Right. But still. Im sorry." She smiled and winced in pain.

We arrived at the ER and I walked her into Carlisle's office. "Sit tight Bella. Im gonna go find my dad. In a minute I was back with Carlisle. Rosalie had called him ahead of time and filled him on what happened.

_Im sorry this happened Edward, but don't be mad at Alice. This wasn't her fault. Its not yours either so don't feel guilty. Sometimes the worse monsters in the world are the humans themselves._

"Im not mad at Alice Carlisle. I know this isn't her fault."

Shit. Fuck. Shit. He didn't say that out loud. Bella was looking at us like we were nuts. Why oh why couldn't I read her mind.? Carlisle looked at me then back to Bella quickly trying to change the subject

"Im sorry that this happened to you Bella but lets take a look at this and see if we can minimize the damage some."

"Um thank you . She looked from him to me quizzically.

**BPOV**

Okay this was weird. Dr. Cullen was freaking gorgeous too! What was this family? Weren't they adopted? Yet they all look the same. They all had that ghostly pale skin and topaz colored eyes. They were ridiculously attractive. And so was Dr. Cullen. He's like a classic beauty.

He took my face gently in his hand and turned to look at my cheek. I winced with pain when he touched it and Edward was at my side instantly. Dr. Cullen's hand was ice cold just like Edwards. I squinted my eyes in his direction. Weird. What was going on?

"Well Bella, the good news is nothing is broken. You will have some pain and swelling and a nasty bruise but some pain killers and make up should take care of that. I'll have Edward bring you some aspirin and you can wait in my office until you're father gets here. Have me paged when he gets here. I have to get back to work. Edward, if you don't mind."

I watched them walk out and thought about the events that passed over the evening; Mike had attacked me in the parking lot. He hit me in the face. And Edward saved me. He came out of no where and saved me. And I loved him even more for it. I what? Okay… so I was falling in love with him. I sat there staring at my reflection in the window. My hair and dress was soaked all the way through and the whole right side of my face was swollen and turning purple.

Edward walked back into the room with a little plastic cup of water and pills in his hand. "Here Bella. Carlisle said for you to take these." I took the pills from him and the little plastic cup. I swallowed them down my eyes stuck on his. The air was thick between us. He was so breathtakingly beautiful. He came closer to me and swept a piece of hair behind my ear. He eyed my bruise and there it was again. That anger. I shrank away from him for a second looking away embarrassed. God only know what he was thinking.

"Bella. I have to tell you some."

I looked back at him and his eyes were locked on to my face. He looked so worried. So hurt. I wish I could wipe this stupid bruise off my face so he wouldn't have to look that way.

"What is it Edward?"

I was captivated by him again. The same way I had been my first day of school. I was being drawn into him from the exam bed. He was so close. If I could only get a little closer. _Just a little closer_. He was staring down at me. I could no longer read his face. My vision went blurry as he exhaled and he breathe was cold and intoxicating. _Just a little closer I thought. Just a little closer. _

**EPOV**

I looked down at Bella. This stupid bruise threatening to take over the whole right side of her beautiful face. I would kill that bastard. She looked so scared and fragile. He had hurt her. He had wanted to do worse. How could I let this happen to her?

Because I was off hunting. I hadn't been able to protect her because I was off feeding my own disgusting need for blood. I thought leaving her with my family would be good enough. I should have known. Only I can protect her.

She was leaning into me. And her scent was intoxicating. I could barely stand to be this close to her and yet I couldn't turn away. Her face was inching closer and closer to mine. Without realizing I was moving closer to her. _Slowly. So slowly. Be_ _gentle Edward_. I had forgotten what I was gonna tell her. It was important. Damnitt what was I going to say?

Right as our lips where about to meet her father busted into the room. I turned and she sat down with a loud thud in the chair. His eyes were wild with anger. This must have been what I looked like.

"Bella! Oh my god are you alright." He grabbed her in his arms and I stepped out of the way knowing he would only get hurt they way he was barreling into me.

"Dad. Dad. Im fine. Its not as bad as it looks I promise. It's just ugly".

He looked up at me. "Are you Dr. Cullen's boy? Edward? The one that pulled that asshole off my daughter?" For a second I couldn't answer. I was jealous. I wanted to be him right now. I wanted to hold her. "Oh, uh yes sir. I'm sorry I didn't get there sooner."

"Don't worry about it. Im just glad you saved her. Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me sir."

"Bella Im gonna need you to come down to the station to make a statement. We've got Newton in a holding cell and since you two were the only ones to see what happened we'll need statements. And don't you worry Bells. That little bastards getting thrown in jail. He wont be able to come anywhere near you.

Carlisle walked into the office and asked chief Swan to step outside with him.

"What did you want to say to me before Edward? You said you wanted to tell me something." I loved the way she said my name. It was like music in my ears.

"Never mind. It's not important right now. There will be other days to talk."

She got out of the chair and walked over to me. In and instant she threw her arms around me. "Thank you so much Edward. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't showed up when you did."

So the shock was finally setting in on her. She had held up pretty well the last hour and a half. Sobs racked through her body and she shook in my arms. She was soaking wet. Her dress clung deliciously to her curves and the make up washed from her face, even with the bruise left her beautiful. The smell of the rainwater mixing with the smell of her blood caused once again this strange mix of feelings between me wanting to bite her and throwing on Carlisle's desk and…

Chief Swan walked back into the office and I pushed Bella in his direction. I know he couldn't read minds but it didn't make it any less uncomfortable thinking what I was thinking with her clinging to me the way she was.

" Dr. Cullen thinks it would be best if you two gave your statements in the morning. It's late and its been a crazy night. I've got to get back to the station so Dr. Cullen is going to give you a ride home and I'll be there home in a few hours."

"Uh Chief Swan. I could take her home. Bella is probably tired and probably wants to change. No need to make her wait. Ill take her home."

"Are you sure? It's a little out of the way for you isn't it."

"Really it's not a problem. I'd feel better seeing Bella home myself anyway." Damnitt. Why did I say that? I knew what he was thinking when he walked in here and saw her on me.

"Alight then. Take her home and be at the station tomorrow morning at 11 to give your statement"

"Yes sir. Tomorrow at 11."

With that he walked towards the door. "Oh and thank you again Edward" he tipped his hat and walked out the door.

Bella just stood there in the middle of the floor rubbing her arm and looking at me. I couldn't help but smile at her. I took off my jacket (it would still be cold but it's better than nothing) and wrapped it around her shoulders leading her to the door.

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**A/N OOOH Edwards is "taking Bella home". I wonder what will happen next. I mean i already know but you dont. Tell me what you would like to see happy. Will Edward give into his Lust for Bella or his craving for her blood?????**

**As i said this was a filler chapter but there was a near and a miss..i'm building anticpation... are you on the edge of you seat yet??? let me know what you think, leave love or hate if you must, say hi or leave me your recipe for lemon cream pie... **


	7. First Kiss and Then Some

**A/N Sorry about the wait for an update...Ive had a busy weekend. Hope you enjoy the new chapter.... **

**Disclaimer:Althouh the actions throughout this story are a creation of my own.. i sadly had borrowed the characters from someone else. **

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**First Kiss and Then Some**

**EPOV**

I walked Bella to her front door. She was pretty much silent the whole ride home short of the whimpers she was making. In the past few weeks that I had been exposed to her she seemed like the head strong kind of suffer in silence type. You know… never lets you see them cry. I ached for her, this guy had broken her spirit and I was too afraid to try and comfort her.

I could tell however, that she was suspicious of something. The way she eyed Carlisle and I. The way she kept glancing at my arm expecting to see blood somewhere. Blood and cuts that she would not see.

"Um Edward my purse is back at school with the keys in it. There's a spare on top of the doorway. Could you get it please?"

She sounded so spent. I just wanted to hold her my arms and let her sleep. Sleep with me. Forever.

I had never seen the inside of her house. It was so homey. I followed her into the kitchen and she sat down at the table. I didn't want to leave her just yet. I needed to stall.

"Would you like me to make you some tea Bella? My mother says it calms nerves or something."

I wasn't lying. My real mother had said that to me. Bella lifted her head off the table and stared at me with pleading eyes.

"Thank you Edward. Im going to go and change."

I watched her walk out of the kitchen. I hadn't paid much attention to what she had been wearing. The cerulean dress clung to her tight body. My pants started to feel tighter and I got mad at myself for not being able to control my urges. I wanted her. I wanted to touch her soft skin and kiss her lips…But I knew I couldn't.

I wouldn't. There was too much at stake and I could never hurt her. I resolved myself to leaving her here with her tea and her perfect body and enchanting eyes and delicious scent. The shower turned on and I smiled to myself as I thought of her slipping her dress down to the floor and standing in the bathroom in all her gloriousness. If only I had x-ray vision...

**BPOV**

I felt like I could smell Mike breath in my hair. I just wanted to wash away this entire night. Well not the entire night. Edward was here with me. He was downstairs in my kitchen making me tea. He had insisted on driving me home instead of his father. He had saved me and held me. Protected me. And if im not mistaken he had almost kissed me in his fathers office. This had to mean something right?

However I couldn't help but think about the things I had seen. Something was different about his family. I had been hanging out with Alice for weeks and had never seen her so much as drink water. They were never in school on sunny days and their skin was always so cold… Not to mention how perfect they looked. Maybe they were like science experiments gone terribly awesome. And Edwards arm. I saw it go through the window. Im not crazy but he didn't have a scratch on him. And Mike flew into the car…

All this thinking was giving me an even worse headache. I was wasting time that I could have been spending with Edward alone for once standing in this shower trying to tear apart the most perfect man I had ever met. I couldn't call him a boy. Not after the way he had acted tonight, no he was the most perfect man.

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around me. I opened the bathroom door and walked right into him. Why was he always lurking outside closed doors????

"Damnitt Bella Im sorry. I..I.. You were taking so long… I thought maybe you had fallen… passed out or something." He was standing there with tea in his hand stammering. I was standing there in a towel looking at him. OMG. I was only wearing a towel. My knees started to shake. No one had ever been seen me like this.

**EPOV**

She was just standing there in this dinky little yellow towel looking up at me with her big doe eyes. I was rendered speechless. She looked ravishing. She had brushed her hair down in a cascade of brown waves around her perfect face down to the creamy skin that was flushed red from the hot water of her perfect breast peeking up at my from her towel. It was much the corset affect. He cheeks were flushed red and my throat starting burning. I felt like I could snap right then and take her in my arms and sink my teeth into the creamy skin of her neck.

**BPOV.**

He just stood there staring down at me. And I couldn't help but blush. You could cut through the tension between us with a knife. He exhaled and his cool breath washed over me again making me dizzy. I couldn't think straight, I just wanted to climb on his perfect body and kiss him. Run my ringers through his messy hair. Have him touch me. Kiss me back. Press me up against this damned wall. My body was starting to get hot as we stood there staring at each other, neither of us moved or spoke. His eyes went dark like the first time I saw him but there was something different about it.

**EPOV**

She wanted me as much as I wanted her. I could see it in her eyes. In fact I could smell it. The scent of her arousal was as sweet as her blood and I couldn't take it anymore. I was trapped. I couldn't will my body to turn away from her like I knew I should. I sat the tea down on a table that was next to her and put my other hand on her waist. _Gently. Slowly. She's fragile. _She didn't pull away as I had expected her to. She took a step towards me. The movement sent another wave of her scent over me. The whole time her eyes never left my face. My mouth pooled with venom as I felt myself hardening at her gently pressing her body to me. I swallowed hard and pushed her waist away knowing she would feel it through my thin sweat pants. I didn't want her to think I was a creep like Mike. But at this moment I couldn't help it. I was torn being _wanting _her and _**wanting her**_. I looked into her eyes and if felt like a lifetime had passed. She finally parted her lips and when she spoke I cold not deny her…

**BPOV**

I couldn't take it anymore. I had felt him against my thigh and I knew I wasn't mistaken. That was no flashlight in his pocket. He was staring at me with lust dripping from his eyes and oh God I wanted him, I didn't care about what had happened to bring us to this point. That seemed a lifetime away. This felt right and good and why was he taking so long to kiss me? He pushed my waist away from his and the absence of his hardness against me angered me. I wanted to feel it. I crashed my hips back into his and he blinked once.

"Kiss me Edward."

He wrapped his other arm around my back and grabbed a handful of my hair. I staggered back into the wall and I thought back to my dream again. Only this time it was right. His mouth was pressed against mine and I parted my lips to invite him in. His tongue dove into my mouth wrestling with mine. I brought my hands up to his face. I grabbed a fist full of his hair pressing his lips to me more. His taste absolutely amazing. It was like sweet honey and it was driving me mad. I was losing control. We stood there pressed against each other feverishly kissing in my hallway. It was like we had been waiting for this forever.

**EPOV**

Her taste was far better than anything I could have imagined. I tried with all my might to keep control of myself but was so hard. I kept leaning into her more exploring every corner of her mouth. I wanted to taste her everywhere. I brought my hand from her waist and picked her up. He legs hung like dead weight but she was so light and perfect in my arms. She detached her lips from mine and took in a long gasp of air. I turned in the direction of her bedroom and pushed the door open with my foot. Bella kissed my lips again and then my face. I could feel her perfect round breast pressed against my chest and damned the fabric that was between us keeping me from her warm skin. I laid her perfect body down on her bed. She pulled me on her top her biting her bottom lip playfully. I wanted that lip.

**BPOV**

Edward laid me down on my bed. Our bodies separated and I couldn't stand having him away from my any longer. I bit my bottom lip and I pulled him closer. He stopped moving and his arms stretched out at my side. He got on his knees in between my legs and touched my hair. He touched my face and his finger moved slowly across my bottom lip. God he was sexy, the way he was looking at me was making me so hot. I could feel the throbbing sensation and wanted him to touch me. But he just kept looking into my eyes. I grabbed his wrist.

His cool skin felt so good against my overheated body. I just needed him to touch me. I dragged his hand down the middle of my chest. His fingers flexed against the towel over my breast. I continued to push it down my stomach. I couldn't look up at him. I was too embarrassed but I needed it. I was sooo hot! I lifted my leg on the side of him and the towel fell down revealing my thigh. I stole a quick glance at him. He was staring at it. He took his other hand and touched it so gently. I took in a gasp of air at the cool sensation of his fingertips against my skin. I had never done anything like this before. But this would be it. Tonight Edward Cullen and I would make love and it would be beautiful.

I kept pushing Edwards hand lower and then he froze. It was as if he just realized what I was doing. I looked up at him scared that he hadn't meant to take things this far. _Please don't reject me. Please don't realize who you are in this room with and walk away. _He brought his hand back up to my face leaned down and kissed my lips. My body was literally shaking with desire for him this point. I wanted to jump inside his skin. _Damnitt Edward don't stop. Please don't stop. You don't know how badly I want this._

He turned my face exposing my bruised face to him. That's it. He was turned off now. Reality and set in and this perfect moment was over. "Bella, My Bella" he whispered in my ear. The sound of his voice… oh god...you could have knocked me out with a feather. It was so sensuous the way he said my name. He kissed my face again and brought his lips back to mine. He body fell against me and our lips locked again. His hands reached down and grabbed my ass pulling me closer to him. My hands flew under his shirt clawing at the skin on his cool back. He was so hard like marble. And then I felt it pressing between my legs. Oh yes he was hard!

I wrapped on leg over his back pulling him towards me more. I just needed to feel him. He growled against my lips and pushed himself more onto me. I gyrated my hips into him. His growling was driving me wild. Edward pushed my face sideway trailing kisses along my jaw line and kissed my neck ever so lightly. He stopped and it was like he was inhaling me. His hands were on my waist pushing me down into the mattress. The pressure kind of hurt but the way he was drinking me in I didn't care. I wanted him to kiss my neck again. Kiss me again and never stop just keep moving south. I pressed my body onto his bringing my neck to his lips. He kissed me again. I moaned into his shoulder "Edward..Oh my god Edward. And then he just stopped. He pushed himself away from me clearing my room. His back pressed up again my dresser. "What the hell?"

**EPOV**

I could feel the blood coursing through her veins beneath my lips. Her body pressed against mine and it took every ounce on my self control not to rip that stupid towel from between us and just pound into her. The way she was pressing herself against me, I could barely contain myself. She pressed her neck to my lips again wanting me to kiss her. _Stupid girl. You have no idea what you are doing to me right now_. My body felt like it was being torn in half but I kissed her, her scent was intoxicating me and I couldn't stay away. But I would only kiss her. I would not allow my teeth to graze her skin because if I did she'd be done for. But then she moaned my name and for a second I almost faltered I had to get away.

I pushed myself away from her my back slamming into a dresser. I head it crack. She looked up at me bewildered. I fucked up. Fuck. Fuck. Shit. She got up on her knees and held the towel around. Her head was cocked to the side in confusion. "Edward…what… how did you…" She sat down and just looked at me like she was trying to figure me out. I wish I could read her mind, it was driving me crazy.

"I can't read your mind Bella, what are you thinking!" I yelled at her.

"You can't read my mind? What do you mean you can't read my mind? Why should you be able to?"

She looked angry. I had expected her to be scared. Throw something at me. Run screaming in to the street naked (although I can't say I wouldn't have wanted to watch that). But she just reached her hand out to me. "Talk to me Edward. What. What's going on?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Try me."

"It's best that I don't say anything. I'll just go. I won't bother you again. I will tell Alice to stay away from you too. I don't want to bring you into this."

"No!"

She looked wild for a minute. Like she would hit me or something. I wanted to laugh at her; she was so cute when she was angry.

"Edward, im not stupid. I figured out that you and you family are different. I just don't know why. I need to understand. I need to understand who I'm falling in love with."

"I...I can't Bella. I can't just tell you."

"Well you're going to have to tell me something or I'll just ask Alice! She'll tell me."

"No, she won't!"

She moved from the bed and walked over to me. I couldn't understand why she wasn't afraid. She grabbed my hand and held it over her heart.

"Do you feel that Edward? It's my heart . And it's yours. I swear what ever your secret is I'll carry it to my grave. "

"That what im afraid of"

"I would never do anything to hurt you Edward. Or your family. Ever"

She was saying she wouldn't hurt me and here I was afraid I would hurt her.

"I will tell you Bella. I want to tell you. You have the right to know. Just give me some time please. Give me some time to figure out how."

I kissed her fingertips and she smiled at me.

"Is it that bad?"

"Kind of yea."

"Okay Edward. Can you just answer one question for me though?"

"Yea, what?"

"Did you know something bad was going to happen to me tonight? Did you know that Mike was going to come after me in the lot? Its...Its just that Alice said you weren't going to come to the dance… and... and you like... you just came out of nowhere."

"That's two questions."

"Just answer!"

I didn't know how to answer it without her having more questions so I answered as simple as I could.

"No. No I didn't know. "

"Then why... Why were you yelling at Alice. You were yelling like she was supposed to know. "

Ugh. There was no getting out of this. I would just have to tell her now.

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**A/N.. Soooo Here comes the big confession. I had a I really hard time figuring out how i was gonna get it out of him which it part of the reason it took me so long to update... **

**As i always ask.. Please drop a lilttle review for me... They are an encouragement to keep going and let me know if there is anything you wanna see happen... after the next chapter the smut will commence full blown so for all you people just looking for naughty bits... you will be pleased... Also check out my other story Once Bitten... thats nothing but smuttness.....**


	8. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind

**Disclaimer: Such a shame I can not claim twilight as my own....**

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**Confessions of a dangerous mind**

**BPOV**

Okay so I could tell something was terribly unsound. I didn't know what to expect so when Edward sat down on my bed I just sat next to him and prepared for the worst.

"Bella, my family and I.. We are…Well…We're different…"

"No shit"

"What I mean to say is…. Um… we are um uhh…"

"Edward just spit it out. What ever it is it can't be that bad. What…are you aliens or something?"

He laughed right in my face. I wanted to punch him, but I couldn't help laughing myself. His smile was unbelievable.

"No Bella, we aren't aliens. But it's just as fictional. To you at least"

"Well what is it than? Superheroes? Real life video games characters?"

"Um. No… Think… more… villainous."

I just stared at him. Villainous. Alice was the sweetest person I knew. And Edward, aside from being capricious, well he was perfect.

"Edward, just…Just tell me. You're not a villain. You may want everyone to think you are, but there no way you could be. So just out with it. Just spit it out."

"Vampire."

Did he just say what I think he did?

**EPOV**

There I said it.

I told her.

I waited for her to scream. To try and push me away. Have heart attack. Something. But she didn't do anything. She sat there with her hands in mine looking at me. Letting it sink in.

Any minute now...

She'd start screaming. I'd have to kill her. She would run down the street screaming VAMPIRE IN MY BEDROOM! She'd run into her father and he try to shoot at me. I'd have to kill him too. Then the neighbors would come out with wooden stakes because they are all so damned stupid and they would chase me. They wouldn't catch me though. I'd run home and tell everyone what happened and we would take off. Set fire to Esmes beautiful house and run away never to be seen again. All because of me.

But that didn't happen.

"Oh" she said finally. "Well that explains a lot I guess. So.. you're a vampire. Is that why you hated me so much when you first saw me? Because you wanted to drink my blood?"

She really was something else. "Yes. You see… my family and I don't drink human blood. We are vegetarians for lack of a better term"

"Edward, vegetables don't have blood."

I couldn't keep from laughing at her again. She was just too cute. So innocent. I cursed myself. Why had I brought her into my dark and ugly world?

"Animals Bella. We only drink the blood of animals."

"Oh. Okay… so then we're are okay then. You won't hurt me. Everything's fine."

"No Bella. Everything isn't fine. I have never wanted a humans blood more than I want yours in all of my existence. You are like the worst kind of drug to me. I get hunger pains when I don't see you. It's like I go through withdrawal when I cant hear your heart beat."

For a second I saw fear in her eyes. Finally the light bulb was on her head. She realized how dangerous I was. She would never want to see me again. I had to admit. A part of me was crushed.

Look Im gonna go. Forget I said anything." I was about to stand when she threw her body on me. She had no idea how dangerous she was being.

"Edward no. Please. Please don't go." She was crying now. I made her cry. I wrapped my arms around her pressing her to me.

"Bella, your father will be home soon. I don't think he would want to see me here. Its better this way. We are from two different worlds. Im… Im too dangerous for you. I don't know what I would do if hurt you… I could never forgive myself.

"Edward please don't leave... I… I … can't be without you."

"Bella…" I couldn't bare it anymore. She was speaking the words written right from my heart. Again I could not deny her. She wanted me as much as I wanted her. I could find a way. I could find away to be with her.

I kissed her hard. She moaned against my lips. Her salty tears falling into my mouth.

"I don't have any fight in me in this whole damn world to tell you to hold off. I love you Isabella.

With tears in her eyes she pressed her lips to mine again. And when she pulled away she yawned. I laughed. I laughed because I loved her and I had been wrong. She wasn't afraid of me. She loved me. For now. And for now that was enough.

**BPOV**

I didn't want him to leave. I wanted him to stay with me forever. But I was tired and I yawned after he kissed me. I thought he would get up set but he laughed and helped me into bed. I was exhausted. But I was afraid if I closed my eyes he would disappear.

"Bella I should go. Charlie will be home soon"

"No Edward please stay"

"Charlie will see my car outside."

"So move it and come back."

"Okay Ill make a deal with you. I'll have Alice come get my car. I'll stay until you fall asleep"

"And then you'll come and take me to the station later?

I know I was being relentless but I didn't want him to leave me. Ever.

"Yes Bella. I'll come and get you and bring you to the station."

Edward let me rest my face on his chest. His cold skin through his t-shirt and it eased the throbbing in my face as I fell asleep. He held onto me and I knew he stayed longer. I heard Charlie's footsteps coming down the hall and looked over at the clock. It was 6 am. Edward slipped from underneath me. He kissed me quickly on the cheek and with lightening speed crossed my room to the window. And then he was gone. I thought I was seeing things. But after what he told me… I thought it best not question him. Expect the unexpected. That was a motto that was becoming the story of my life.

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**A/N: Short chapter i know.... I just wanted to get the confession out of the way. Im pleased with it though.**

**Please let me know what you think. And thank you to those who are following my story and have left reviews for me... It is much appreciated.**


	9. Really

**A/N So this chapter starts out a little slow but its ends really funny. Hope you're enjoying this so far. Im enjoying writing it.**

**Disclaimer:Technically the twilight characters dont belong to me.. but whose being technical... oh.. the lawyers right.....**

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**Really… You Cant be Serious**

**EPOV**

I left Bella's room early in the morning. I didn't know if she saw me go through the window but I would worry about that later. I thought back over the events of last night. This was the second biggest catalyst in my life. The first being my having been changed. Now here I found myself changed again. I, having never felt love for anyone but my family, now have this love burning the very core of me. Melting me from the inside out. It was in many ways the scariest thing I've had to experience.

What if I hurt her? I shook my head not wanting to think about it. I would stay as long as I could. As long as it was safe for her.

I took off running through the woods behind Bella's house. I didn't know what to expect when I got there but upon reaching the house I found Alice sitting on the porch waiting for me.

"Had a good time last night Edward" she was grinning from ear to ear. I didn't even think that Alice would be watching me. I actually felt a little embarrassed.

"Um yea thanks for asking. She took it better than I thought she would. Far better."

"I knew she would. Why do you think I was trying to push you so hard? You deserve to happy too ya know. Doesn't matter what you think."

"Do they know I told her?"

"Yea, I told Carlisle a few days ago that I saw you telling her, I just didn't know how. He's okay with it. We know she won't say anything"

Alice walked back into the house and I followed her. I wasn't happy with the thoughts I was hearing coming from Rosalie, but everyone else seemed okay. I went up to my room to change and wait out the hours until I had to go get Bella.

When I arrived at Bella's I could hear her in the kitchen. I knocked on the door a few times but she didn't answer so I let myself in. She was standing at the kitchen sink with a muffin in her hand touching her lips smiling.

A stream of sunlight had come in through the windows and hit her face. She looked heavenly. I could see the red highlights in her hair that was brushed around her face. Almost like it was last night. I stood in her doorway staring sheepishly at the floor. After what had happened between us I felt a little uneasy around her. I guess I was still expecting her to freak out.

"What are you thinking about Bella?"

"Oh, Edward. I didn't hear you come in."

"I didn't mean to startle you Bella. I knocked a few times but you didn't answer."

"Oh, sorry I guess I was somewhere else…Um… how are you feeling…today I mean…about last night I mean…"

She was stumbling over her words and biting her bottom lip while she thought of what to say. I thought back to how it had felt to kiss her last night. Having her so close to me. Her scent. I could feel that familiar pulsing again. Just thinking about her in that towel was turning me on.

"Im fine. The more important question is how you are feeling. About last night I mean."

"Im…Im okay. May face still sort of hurts but it's not the worst pain I've ever been in."

"Well, that's good, anything else?"

"Anything else… a little tired I guess"

I couldn't help but grow impatient. I was waiting for her to tell me to leave. To never speak to her again.

"About me Bella? About what I told you? About my family and I?"

"Oh ….That… um… I guess I have some questions. But we.. we don't have to talk about that right now. Im just happy you're here."

She smiled at me and walked across the room wrapping her arms around my waist. I held her close to me for a moment taking in her scent. I could feel her heart bear slowly against me her warmth wrapping itself around me.

"We should get down to the station. You're father should be expecting us soon." She looked up at me and standing on her toes gave me a peck on the lips. She put her hand into mine and I could tell she was trying to show me she was comfortable with me. With what I was. It was like she could read my mind.

We arrived at the station and all around us people were thinking how sorry they felt for her, how they were happy I had been there to protect her, and how stupid Mike was for attacking the chief's daughter.

The few hours were brutal. They questioned both of us separately and took pictures of Bella's face. Apparently Mike had made some story of how Bella had gone to the dance with him and I had showed up angry and jealous. He said that I was the one who hit Bella. His parents even wanted to press assault charges on me. However no one believed him. Enough people had seen Bella and Alice show up together. I heard Carlisle come in. Charlie had called him down. This was turning into a bigger mess than I had expected.

Finally I could see Bella again. She ran into my arms with tears in her eyes and my frozen heart melted. She had run to me. Not away from me. She wanted me to comfort her.

Then they brought him out.

_Wish I could have at least gotten a piece before that asshole showed up. Make all this crap worth it. I'll get it though. I'll make her pay for this shit. Him too for busting up my car._

My mind went blank for a moment and I could faintly hear Bella saying my name. She was trying to get my attention but all I could think about was ripping him to pieces. He was planning to come after her again when they let him out. There was no way in hell I would let him. He was relentless. He was thinking of all the horrible things he would do to her. Where he would leave her… where he would run to. A growl started in the pit of my stomach. I hadn't realized it but I had gripped onto Bell's waist. I could hear Carlisle in my head telling me to calm down. That my eyes were black as night. That I would hurt Bella…

Hurt Bella. I let her go immediately

Then I felt Bella's lips on mine. She was holding my face in her hands kissing me. Trying to calm me. I kissed her back for a moment then took her hand from my face. It was to easy to lose control around her. I looked at Carlisle through the window in Charlie's office nodding my head so he knew I was in control of myself.

"Im sorry Bella. I didn't mean to scare you. Its just… well…"

She looked up at me. Her brown eyes searching my face. She looked worried. Her arms wound tightly around my waist, and I knew she was worried about me. When lord when she was going to worry about herself in my presence. I could have crushed her a moment ago and she had no idea.

A few minutes later we were free to go. Carlisle had agreed to pay for the damages to the Mikes car if his parents didn't press assault charges and agreed to look over Mike himself for any body damages I had caused.

We parted ways in the parking lot and Bella sat in my car my hand in her lap rubbing my skin.

"You're so smooth. Like Marble. It's nice."

"We should talk."

"Yea, probably. "

She turned to look at me. I pulled over at my destination and waited for what she was going to say.

"Look Edward Im sorry for pushing you last night. I didn't mean to make you tell me… and Im sorry for causing so much trouble for you and your family. All I could think about today was what if someone found out. I …I was scared for you."

I smiled at her. Again. More worried about me than herself. She had gone through this traumatic experience and she was more worried about me. We got out of the car and she looked around.

"Edward why are we in the woods? We're aren't going hiking are we because I don't know if you've noticed but im not exactly coordinated enough for that."

"Well, I was thinking I'd hike and you'd ride shot gun…"

Before she could say anything I tossed her onto my back and took off up the mountain. She squealed behind me as I ran with vampire speed up into the clearing out of the cloud bank where the sun was just starting to shine through the trees. I set her down a little wobbly on her feet and held her hands until she regain her equilibrium.

"That was amazing…that was.. I don't even know what to say" I pulled her more into the clearing and as the sun shone over me, I took off my jacket letting her see the skin on my face and arms sparkle. She came between my knees slowly tentatively touching my face. She trailed her fingers up my arms and down my arms.

"You're beautiful."

"This is why we don't go out in the sun. People would know we were different."

"You mean know one else noticed?"

"No, you're the first person we've allowed so close to us. Alice is friendly to everyone but she's never tried to be friends the way she is with you. She ummm… could see that you wouldn't mind… so she didn't pretend as much around you."

"What do you mean she could see?"

"Well, see Alice can see the future. She knew that I would tell you and that you wouldn't freak out."

"Oh, so that what you meant. When you were yelling at her I mean."

"Yea, she's really sorry about that by the way. When a persons judgment is clouded the way it is when they are drunk she cant see clearly. She didn't know that would happen."

"And you… what do you do?"

"I read minds. Everyones but yours…"

"Everyones but mine? Why not mine? What's wrong with me?"

"There isn't anything wrong with you. Theres everything wrong with me"

Bella pressed her lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around her back holding her close to me. Her hands wound themselves into my hair and she pushed all her weight onto me trying to push me on my back. He scent was taking over me. It seemed to linger in the air around us. I could feel her skin begin to heat up beneath my hands and I knew I had to break the kiss. The blood would rush to her skin and in the position we were in it was way to easy to lose control. I pushed her away and she was panting hard her hands on her knees trying to catch her breath. I moved her to sit next to me and she just lay her head on my shoulder. We sat there talking, her asking questions about my vampire life taking everything more easily than I could imagine and me asking questions about her. It stated to get dark so I ran her back down the mountain and drove her home.

When we got to her house I could sense that Charlie was inside asleep on the couch. I knew that I should go hunt after spending so much time with her. The burning in my throat was beginning to annoy me.

"I had a nice time with you today. Thanks for explaining everything to me"

"I had to give you the choice you. I didn't want to lie to you. Make you think that im something Im not. I owe you that much."

She pulled my hand up to her face and held it there closing her eyes. "It doesn't change how I feel about you. Im just afraid you'll disappear. Like this is just a dream and Im going to wake up soon and you'll be gone."

"Unfortunately you aren't dreaming. And I'm not going anywhere"

I leaned in and kissed her softly on the lips. She exhaled slowly leaning into the kiss more. Her lips parted and she sucked my bottom lip between hers. They were so warm over mine I could stop myself. My other hand found its way to her waist gripping onto her. Her hand snaked into my hair and before I knew she had climbed over into the front seat into my lap. I put the seat back with one hand taking off her sweatshirt with the other. She starting kissing my neck her tiny finger working the buttons on my shirt.

Her hand ran up my stomach and over my chest slowly. She bit her bottom lip playfully looked down at her hands on my chest. I loved it when she bit her lip. I pulled her down kissing her… grabbing that devilish little lip between mine. My hand found there way into the back pocket of her jeans. I squeezed her ass pulling her into my painfully hard erection. She moaned on my mouth and started to grind herself on me. She took off her shirt and pressed her warms breasts against me.

I was damn near in agony. I wanted her so bad in the moment. The windows fogged over with the heat of her skin. The car filled with her scent and I thought I was blacking out. She was rhythmically grinding on me while our tongues and lips violently fought each other. All I could hear was her labored breathing and soft moans.

I could barely control myself. All I could think about was taking her clothes off and taking her right in the back seat of my car. Then she did it again. She brought her lips to my neck. Her hot blood rushed through her veins. I kissed her neck and she rolled her head to the other side to I could kiss the side where her pulse pumped beneath her skin. I grabbed her wrapping my arms around her back. Her lower half never stopped riding against me. I was so hard and I could feel her through my pants and hers. The warmth emanating off her was driving me wild. A tightening sensation started in my stomach and I realized what would happen if she didn't stop.

"Bella, Bella slow down… you have to… you have to stop."

"Ugh Edward pleases….Just…Just… Just kiss me. Just please kiss… me…"

"Bella… please... just slow down… don't..dont move…."

And then it happened. My legs tightened together and couldn't stop myself from cumming. I squeezed my lips to stop from moaning so I wouldn't give away what happened. I gripped the steering wheel and felt it come right off the car. Bella pressed her against me once my hips instinctively lifted to meet her. She latched on to my lips breathing hard and moaned my name out as she came in my lap. She shook violently in my lap gripping the sides of my shirt and then fell against my chest.

Shit. My fucking steering wheel.

Bella lay against me her chest heaving. Her fingers ran through my hair and she kissed my chin, my neck. I didn't want her to know what just happened. I held the steering wheel in place with one hand and stroked her back trying to cool her down with the other. I leaned down and kissed her softly on the lips. She cooed and nestled her face in my neck. I didn't want her to go. I wanted her to hold her all night… but I need to go home.. and change… my pants…..

We sat there in silence for a few moments and her breathing slowed. She was falling asleep. I shook her awake.

"Bella. Bella sweetheart. Go in and go to bed. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Oh, I didn't even realize I was falling asleep. That was amazing Edward."

"Yea, it was. But Charlie is waking up. He'll probably worry if you aren't home. Its after 11"

Bella put her clothes back on and kissed me goodnight. I watched her until she walked sleepily into her house before turning my attention back to my broken steering wheel and the sticky mess in my pants.

I couldn't leave my car here. Charlie would see it. And I certainly couldn't push it home when someone knocked on my window. I looked over to see Emmett's Big stupid grin looking at me. He was holding a pair of pants in his hand.

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**A/N I enjoyted writing this ending becuase it made me laugh when i thought of it. I hope you enjoyed it to.**

**As i have asked a million times please review. Reviews are my wheaties...**


	10. Gets worse

**A/N I know you were probably expecting this next chapter to be from Bella but this is an important one for Edward so it had to be this way...**

**Enjoyt it either way,**

**Disclaimer: Twilight doenst belong to me.... damnitt!!!**

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**And Here I Thought it Wouldnt Get Worse**

**EPOV**

"What are you doing here Emmett"

"Whoa whoa… don't look so happy to see me. Alice saw what happened… I had to wrestle everyone in the house to come get you…I was not passing this chance up"

He handed me the pants through the window and hitched my car to his truck while I changed.

"So how bad is it gonna be when I get home?

"Well… Alice is doing a killer expression of your "O" face… Oh Oh Oh"

He grabbed onto the steering wheel trying to mock me.

"Its not funny…at all… besides you act like its never happened to you…"

"Actually, it hasn't. I unlike you my dear brother am capable of satisfying a woman…human and vampire alike."

I tried ignoring his thought of the countless woman he had been with prior to Rose and then gagged when he thought about all the stuff he did with her.

"Do you mind… besides that isn't what I was talking about. Alice must have told you she knows."

"Um yea, we know she knows, but what just happened is way funnier to talk about. Even Carlisle is getting a kick out of it."

"Im glad I can amuse you all but still, Rose is upset I know that much."

"Yea but you know her. She'll get over it once the attention is back on her for some reason or another. I guess she just doesn't get it. None of us really do actually."

"I don't either. That's the scary part. Its like I can't stay away."

"Well, all I can say and im sure you'll get tired of hearing this…Be careful. The last thing we need is the chiefs' daughters blood on your hands."

I grimaced at the thought of hurting her.

"Im sure I can manage to control myself around her"

"Apparently not…."

Emmett smirked at me and I couldn't help but laugh. Although I knew his jokes would be relentless… they were all in good humor. We rode the rest of the way home in verbal silence but that didn't stop Emmett's mind from running through every premature ejaculation joke he could think of. When got upstairs everyone was sitting in the living waiting for me. Oh boy, here we go… a big family discussion. So not what I wanted to deal with. Japer was trying to keep the mood in the room relaxed but he wasn't doing very well. All around me everyone had smiles on their faces like they were trying to hold back laughter.

"Alright everyone, go ahead and laugh it up. Im sure nothing embarrassing had happened to any of you."

Rose sat in the recliner looking at me. "Last time I checked vampires were supposed to be graceful. That…That was not graceful at all. You're no different from a regular teenage boy."

She busted out in a fit of laughter and everyone joined in except for Esme. She was at my side in an instant pulling my head to her shoulders.

"Okay okay, lets leave Edward alone. Im sure we've embarrassed him enough for tonight. Besides we have more important issues to talk about."

"I don't see why we all have to be apart of this discussion. It's his problem not ours. "

"Rose we are a family; we handle everything as a family"

"Yea but Carlisle, he didn't tell anyone he was going to tell her. It none of her business what we are. There was no need to rat out the whole family."

"I apologize Rose; I didn't mean to inconvenience you in any way. And in my defense I hadn't intended to tell her that way. I had everyone intention on speaking with all you before I said anything.

I could tell that Rose was angrier than she let on. She was cursing me out in her head where no one else could hear her.

"Yea but you didn't. I don't see why you could just be with Tanya like everyone wanted. You had to go and fall in love with a human. What's wrong with you?"

Everyone sat in silence while we argued. It was a spoken rule that no one wouldn't interfere with a fight unless it got violent.

"Why should I be forced to be with someone I don't feel anything for? Rose no one said anything when you brought Emmett home. And I never told anyone how you watched him before his "incident. So how are you any different than me?"

I swear if she could have turned red she would have. She balled up her fists and stomped her foot on the floor breaking a hole it in.

"Edward you asshole! You'll pay for that!"

She jumped at me but I was to fast for her. Carlisle stepped in-between us and she stoppedshort to keep from crashing into him.

"Rosalie, you know we never use violence in this house. Get a hold of yourself!"

Rose walked back over to her seat and sat down. I loved my sister but she certainly was a spoiled brat. Esme was holding my hand the whole time. I know she hated it when we argued. Usually someone would leave for a year or two and she would be depressed. I hated it when she was upset and even more so when I was the cause of it. She cleared her throat and pushed me towards the couch to sit down.

"Okay. That's it. All of you listen to me. Everyone has someone in this house expect for Edward and now that he's found someone we should be happy for him. I wouldn't care if he fell in love with a damned rock and neither should you. You all know what if feels like to have someone to love. Rosalie, why wouldn't you want that for you brother?"

We all sat in silence. I hated being the topic of discussion. The last time they discussed my love life they attempted to set me up with Tanya, our "cousin", from Denali and lets just say that didn't go very was still trying to control the mood in the room enough to get everyone to calm down. We sat there looking at each other. Hours could have passed.

Finally Jasper spoke, "I personally don't have any objection to the two of them being together. In fact I commend Edward on giving Bella the choice. It would have been worse had she found out in some other unfortunate way."

Everyone chimed in with pretty much the same feelings expect for Rosalie.

"Edward look, its not that I don't want you to be happy. But I like it here. It's the only place were we can live semi-normal lives. I'm not ready to give that up. Cant you just stay away from her? Or you know go someplace else until she graduates or something."

Esme started fuming. She was gripping the couch hard enough to crush the wood in the arm.

"ROSALIE HALE…DON'T YOU EVER EVER ASK ONE OF YOU FAMILY MEMBERS TO LEAVE THIS HOUSE. THAT IS NOT YOUR REQUEST TO MAKE. YOU APOLIGIZE RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME GOD YOU REGRET THE WORDS YOU JUST SAID!"

Carlisle came to Esmes side to try and calm her and I could feel Jasper trying with all his strength to do the same.

"Im sorry. Im sorry mom…. I didn't mean to upset you. Its just…

"No… not another word out you Rosalie. You've said enough tonight. Go… go to your room. I don't wanna hear another peep out of you for the rest of the night."

Rosalie got up and sulked past her.

"Sorry Ed, I didn't know she would…"

I held my hand up telling Emmett he didn't have to continue. He followed up after Rose. In my head I could hear her:

_Im sorry Edward. I don really want you to leave. I just don't want something bad to happen. Believe or not I do want you to be happy like the rest of us. Just in a safer way._

"Okay Edward, now that you know how everyone feels we wont push you on this issue anymore. You deserve to be happy like the rest of us. But I must tell you, if you decide to change her, let it be with her consent. After she's been fully informed. There is more than just the feelings of the two you to consider you know. Bella has a family as well."

I couldn't believe what Carlisle was saying to me. Change her? Change Bella?

"Carlisle what are you talking about? I have no intentions on taking Bella's life. That's absurd."

"Edward… I saw it. I saw her as one of us. I don't know how its going to happen but I saw it."

I looked at Alice and my mind was breaking. I never once thought for a moment that I would change her. Ever. Never. Not an option. Out of the question.

"No, that isn't going to happen. I have resolved to stay with her as long as it was safe for her and no longer. I have no intentions on damning her beautiful soul. Its out of the question and I don't wanna hear another word about it."

I took off running out of the house. I needed to clear my head and think about what I should do next.

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**A/N So now Edwards know he sees Bella being changed. What will he do???? Will he tell her? Give her the choice? Or will he stay away from her ...leave go to Denali like Rose suggested......????**

**As i always request please drop a lilttle line for me.. or just say hi... tell me your favorite song and ill try to get the lyrics in somewhere**


	11. Unusual you

Unusual You…

BPOV

I woke up the next morning feeling like I was in ecstasy. I still hadn't come down off my high from last night. The images of Edward and I pressed against each other in the front seat of his car replayed over and over in my head. I missed him terribly. He had mentioned something about seeing me today and so I got dressed and went down stairs to wait. Charlie was sitting at the kitchen table eating a plate of eggs so I decided to join.

"Morning Dad. How did things go after Edward and I left last yesterday?"

"Not as good as I would have hoped. He'll be back in school on Monday. They are pulling him from any classes you two have together so you won't have to see him at least."

Charlie sat a can of mace on the table between us.

"What, you want me to carry this. I don't think so Dad."

"Bells give your old man some peace of mind and just carry it. The Cullen boy won't always be around you know."

I couldn't hide the sadness that thought brought me. The thought of him leaving. Not being around. Not being with me. It was like someone was squeezing my heart. I couldn't explain it.

"Um thanks Dad, Im gonna go get some homework done." I ran up the stairs trying to shake the thought of Edward leaving me from my mind but it was stuck there. I couldn't shake it until I got to me room and there he was sitting on the edge of my bed. Waiting for me.

"How.. How did you get in here?"

"The window."

"Do you do that a lot?

"Only the past few months or so. I like to watch you sleep. It's interesting. You..uh…you talk a lot you know"

"So I've been told. I haven't said anything to embarrassing have I."

"No not really… although I get the feeling you really want to see me naked"

I walked across the room and sat next to him. He quickly wrapped his arms around me kissing me. He exhaled onto my face and his cool breath washed over me making me dizzy. Before I knew I had turned to face him. His hands were holding my waist tightly almost pushing me away yet his kiss was passionate. It felt like he was trying to tell me something with his kiss. If only I could read his mind…

I brought my hand up to his face and though it pained me I pulled away. "Edward…is something wrong?" I thought over in my head what could have happened to make him act this way. It felt like something bad was going to happen. He didn't say anything. He just looked at me. Then he laid down on my bed staring up at the ceiling. I watched his eyes follow the same crack in the ceiling I eyed every night before falling asleep. He lay there motionless like a Greek statue. I couldn't take my eyes away from him. He was so beautiful.

I started to think about what I had done to deserve his love. What did he see in me? I was so plain and yet he watched me while I slept. He wanted to be with me more than he wanted to drink my blood. He loved me. All these thoughts swam around in my head for what seemed like hours until he finally spoke. The musical tone in his voice pulled me out of my trance.

"What are we doing Bella?"

"What do you mean?

"I mean with us. What are we doing?"

"You mean like are we couple?"

He sat up faster than humanly possible and grabbed both my hands in his. "I assumed that we were from the moment I kissed you. Is that not what you want? Tell me. I'll won't push you into anything you don't want. Ever."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was he kidding? Did he forget me telling him that I was falling in love with him?

"Edward, of course that's what I want. That's what I wanted from the moment I saw you. To just be near you. Nothing about you is typical or predictable. I can't explain it but I've never fallen for someone as hard as fast as I have for you."

He pulled me to him and kissed me softly on the lips. My hands were pressed against his hard chest. I could feel myself getting dizzy from his scent. I was becoming drunk off him but I didn't care. I moved to straddle his lap and his cool hands ran up the burning skin on my back. My head tilted back and a moan escaped my lips as his kissed his way from my chin to my collar bone. He traced it with his tongue and couldn't stop myself from curling my fingers in his hair and pushing up against him. I reveled in the way his body felt against mine.

Before I knew it I was on my back and he was on top of me. He kissed me hard on the lips before running his fingers up my shirt popping all the buttons as he went. His kisses were hungry yet passionate. He ran his had down the side of my face down over my neck and down between my breast to my stomach. A growl escaped him and it turned me on even more if that were at all possible. I mashed my lips to his to quiet the moans as he ran his fingers inside my jeans across my stomach.

"Bella, Bella, Im going out for a few. Don't worry about dinner tonight, I'll bring something home." Charlie was calling to me from the bottom of the stairs. I pulled my face from Edwards trying to catch my breath enough to answer him. It was nearly impossible because as I was trying to respond Edward had moved lower planting tiny soft kisses along the top my chest."

"You're gonna pay for that you know." "Oh I hope so." I grabbed his face bringing it back up to mine biting his lip as hard as I could. He must have like because he pushed his hard cock against me with so much force a yelp escaped my lips before it registered in my head what had just happened.

He lay still for a moment then eased himself off of me. "Im sorry Bella, I didn't mean to hurt you"

I leaned up on my elbows and looked him over. When did he take off his shirt? My eyes traveled down his face over his chest and well defined stomach down to the unmistakable bulge in his pants. My mouth started to water as I eyed it greedily. All I could think about in that moment was getting him out of those pants and having him inside me. I wanted him.

"Bella, Bella are you okay? Are you hurt? Did I hurt you?"

I didn't ever answer him. I threw the remainders of my shirt on the floor and pounced on him. He caught me as my lips crashed into his. I grabbed his bottom lip between mine and sucked it as hard as I could clawing my fingers into his back. He growled at me again and it only egged me on. I brought my hands down to his waist bringing them around to the front of his pants. I gripped them tightly pulling at the buttons trying to get them loose.

I got one open before I realized they were button fly's and there were four more. Frustration ran through my brain as I ripped his pants open. I faintly heard him groan but couldn't hear much over my own labored breathing.

He pushed me back on the bed and lust like the first night we were together dripped from his eyes. I bit my bottom lip…he was so damn sexy. He came down to my side kissing my again. His hands popped the button right off my pants and he spread the top open.

I felt that familiar stickiness between my legs and wanted out of my pants. I tried to shimmy my way out of them just wanting to feel him touch me there. I need him to cool the fire that was threatening to take over me. All the while he was kissing down my neck down to my chest. He stopped when he got to my breast and just stared at them. He lay still his hand on my lower stomach eyeing my chest as it rose in fell with every breath I took. Then I felt my heart pounding. It was pounding so hard in my chest I thought I would have a heart attack. I couldn't tell what I was feeling with the way he was staring at me.

"Calm down Bella. Calm down and breathe."

"Why… did… you … stop…?

He sat up buttoning his pants and put his shirt back on. I was furious. Again he stopped.

He moved to the other side of the room and sat in my rocking chair looking at me. Once I caught my breathe I sat up suddenly very self conscious and pulled a pillow over my breast.

"Edward I do something wrong?"

He smiled at me and crossed the room in what seemed like one step and sat next to me taking my hand in his.

"Of course not Bella."

"Than why did you stop. Don't you want me?"

He kissed me softly on the lips and pushed me back against the headboard while taking the pillow away. My head leaned back as he placed a kiss over my hear letting his fingers trail over my stomach.

"Bella you have no idea how badly I want you. But considering the circumstances…I want to have as normal of a relationship as I could possibly have with you. And that means taking things like this slowly with you."

"Oh…okay… that sounds nice actually. Its probably best. I'm not really experienced in that area anyway."

I looked at him sheepishly hoping that he wouldn't laugh. I mean how many 17 year old girls do you that have no sexual experience. He didn't laugh. His yes lit up and he pecked me on the lips again.

"Good. Neither do I. So if it happens it will be a first for the both of us."

He was like over a hundred years old. How could he a virgin? Besides he was beautiful. I could barely keep my lips and hands off him.

"You're kidding right? You're a virgin?"

"Yea, why is that so hard to believe?

"Well I mean look at you… and you're… you're so old"

"Bella, I didn't laugh at you. And im not that old."

I couldn't stop laughing. He glared at me for a few minutes then grabbed my leg and pulled me until I was flat on my back. He pounced on me and started tickling me. I couldn't control my laughter.

"Edward… Edward stop… you're gonna make me pee…"

He stopped and kissed me lightly on the cheek before pushing off me.

"Anyways, im serious Bella. I want to have as normal as a relationship with you as I possibly can. And that include taking you home to meet my mother."

My jaw dropped. I don't know how long I sat like that with my mouth wide open. He wanted to take me home to meet his mom. I couldn't believe it. I suddenly felt so nervous as I thought over how close him and his family are. How they have no secrets from each other.

"You want me to meet you mother?"

"Well, yea. She been asking to meet you since well the first time I saw you. Alice kind of told her we'd end up together and she's just been waiting for it to happen I guess."

We decided that I would go to his house the next Friday and the he left to go 'have dinner with his family". He kissed me again before leaving me to do my homework promising to come back later that night to stay with me as I slept.


	12. Date Night

Meet the Parents

BPOV

The next week was a particularly sunny one. Of course the Cullen's were off on a "camping trip" leaving me to deal with the first days back alone. As Charlie had said, Mike had been pulled from any of the classes we had together and also from my lunch period. The only person sorry to see him go was Jessica. The week nearly flew past with Edward coming to the house when Charlie was at work and sneaking into my room at night to stay with me while I slept. It all seemed so fast but i felt whole with him. Like i was asleep until he came into my life and now i was wide awake.

Finally Friday evening came and I was as nervous as I could possibly be. Edward and I decided that he would pick me up from home and he would properly introduce himself to Charlie and tell him that I was having dinner with his parents.

"Bells is everything alright you seem kind of nervous. Did something happen in school today? Anything we should talk about?"

"Um..no Dad…nothing happen in school today. Its just well tonight is kind of a special night."

"Oh damn… did I forget you birthday or something?"

"No dad…you didn't forget my birthday. My birthday isn't until October."

"Right. So what it is? Why are you so dressed up? You have a date or something?

"Um… I guess you can say that."

"Why didn't you tell me Bells? Who's this guy? He go to you school?"

I heard Edwards car pull up to the front of the house. A few seconds later he was knocking at the door. I opened it and there he was. Every time I saw him he took my breath away. He was wearing a white button down shirt with the sleeves cuffed around his biceps. A black tie around his neck. He had on black pants and boots and he was stunning. I suddenly realized why Alice had laid out the blue and yellow plaid pencil skirt and yellow top for me. He kissed my cheek pulling a bouquet of pink roses from behind his back and grabbed my hand. "You look beautiful" he whispered in my ear and pulled me towards the kitchen.

"Chief Swan. It's a pleasure to see you again"

"You're the guy?"

"Yes sir, I certainly hope so."

"Bella, why didn't you tell me you two were dating?"

"Well, actually Dad this is really our first date." I started to blush and Edward gently squeezed my hand.

"Well, where are you taking my daughter tonight?"

"My mother has been waiting to meet Bella. She cooked dinner for us. Then I was going to take Bella to Port Angles to see a movie. We won't be out late sir. I promise to have Bella back before midnight."

"Its your first date and she's already going to meet you mother?"

"Considering the event of last week, Esme my mother, has insisted.

Charlie sat there at the table polishing his rifle looking Edward up and down.

"Alright then… I don't have to tell you to be careful with my daughter"

"Not a problem sir. I'll guard Bella with my life."

He flashed a toothy smile at Charlie and if I hadn't of known better I would have said he smiled back.

We made the drive to Edwards's house with small talk about what he had planned for the evening. What I saw when got there was like something out of an episode of Lifestyles of the rich and famous. The house was way up in the woods with evergreens all around it. Above the house was a large opening in the trees where no doubt, the sun would shine through the giant glass walls of the house.

I couldn't tell what was more remarkable: the inside or the outside. The front door was a giant navy blue hobbit door. In the foyer hanging from the ceiling was a ginormous crystal chandelier. The floor dipped into the living room that was covered in plush white carpets. In the middle of the floor stood oval shaped sleek black piano. It was the most awkward and beautiful thing I'd ever seen (see profile for link).

"So what do you think?"

"It's beautiful. Who plays piano?"

"Well, we all play a little, but this is my baby."

Edward grabbed my hand and walked me over to the piano. I sat down on what was the softest couch I'd ever sat on and watched his long slender fingers graceful flit across the keys.

"What's your favorite song Bella?

"Everlong by the Foo Fighters. Do you know it?" He just smiled at me. His fingers flitted over the keys again as her started to play. Then he started singing…

"Hello, I've waited her for you. Everlong…Tonight… I've thrown myself into…."

He played and sang the whole song and it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever heard. I couldn't stop the tears from running down my face. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Alice sitting standing behind me.

"Don't cry Bella, you'll mess up your makeup."

I hadn't even noticed his family was standing in the living room watching him us. I was so embarrassed. I could feel the blood rush to my face and as I looked down at the floor. Edward pulled me up from the couch and I was happy at that moment that he was so graceful because my feet felt like I had weights in my shoes. and what I could only assume was his wife were standing in the kitchen doorway and we were headed right for them. I hadn't been this nervous since my first day in biology with Edward.

I looked up and there she was with the most warm, inviting, un-vampire smile on her face. If she didn't looks so much like the rest of the Cullen's I wouldn't have thought was a vampire at all. She glided down the stairs damn near on her toes and hugged me so gently I barely felt her at all.

"Bella is such a pleasure to meet you. Edward and Alice have told me so much about you"

"It's very nice to meet you as well Mrs. Cullen."

"Please dear, call me Esme."

We piled into the living to sit and talk for a while. I noticed that Emmett and Rosalie weren't around and neither was Jasper. After about an hour or so Carlisle (he also asked me to call him by his first name) and Esme excused themselves followed by Alice. Edward and I were left sitting on his couch.

"See that wasn't so bad. You were nervous for nothing."

"Yea, your family is really nice Edward. It must be great having a family as close as yours."

"It has its advantages. So what would you like to do? We could drive up to Port Angles, though I doubt we'll be back before midnight, or we could stay here and watch a movie."

I thought it over for a while. Every time Edward and I were alone things tended to get hot and heavy. I was suddenly very self-conscious of being in a house full of vampires with extra-sensitive hearing.

"Could we maybe just go for a walk?"

"Yea, sure I know a nice spot we could go to."

I followed Edward out the backdoor and down the stairs. He had grabbed a blanket on the way out and we walked in silence until I could hear water. We stopped at a brook and Edward laid the blanket down pulling me to sit on it. The scene was something out movie. The full moon broke through the trees and reflected off the water giving the forest a dark blue hue. In the direct moonlight Edwards's skin had an alabaster tone and his honey eyes sparkled. He laid down next time me holding my hand. It was so quiet and serene that my heart started to pound. Again I had that awkward feeling that something was wrong. Normally Edward would be talking. Asking me questions about what I was thinking. Stroking my hair … anything. But he did nothing. I could feel his gaze boring through the back of my head. I was to afraid to turn around and look at him because I got the strange feel that he was going to say something I didn't want to hear.

He pulled me down gently next to him. I laid my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around one of his. I felt like this was the last time I would be this close to him and I wanted to drink in every minute of it.

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**A/N Whats goin on in Edwards head????? Is he still thinking about going to Denali????? Does he want to leave Bella....or take their relationship further????**

**I just want to thank the people who have written reviews for me. Also any new readers looking in..please take the time out to drop a line and let me know how im doing...or just say hi and tell me how much you like the new Transformers movie. Optimus was giving out lollipops and ass kickings and ran out of lollipops when he got to the decepticons...**


	13. Date Night Part 2

**A/N okay so the last chapter was a little rushed i admit. I was trying to work up to this chapter. In my defesnse i havent slept in the last 2 days and that chapter was written somewhere between disillusion and delirium..Hope fully you enjoy this one more.**

**Disclaimer... i think we all know by now that the origins of twilight do not belong to me...**

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**Date night part 2**

**EPOV**

Bella looked even more beautiful in the moonlight. I could see that she was tense about something. Nervous even. Over the past week I had spent every night with her. Getting to know her. Letting her know me. I figured if I cared deeply enough for her, more than I did with falling in love at first sight, that it would be that much harder for Alice's visions to come true. I was learning to control myself being around her. Since that day in her bedroom we hadn't done anything physical. It had been particularly difficult that night. My thirst for her was threatening to take over; I didn't want to scare her so I told her we needed to take things slowly. In other words I was saying _I need to get used to you before I kill you. _

I pulled her down next to me. Her head rested on my shoulder. I turned my face and inhaled deeply. Her hair smelled of vanilla. I brought my hand to the side of her face stroking slowly. She shivered at first contact but then wrapped her arms around my one arm and leaned into my touch.

"Edward, can I ask you something without you getting upset?"

"Anything Bella."

"Well, you know how you told me Alice has visions right?"

I was hoping against hope that Alice hadn't said anything to her about what she saw. Alice was tiny but she could annoy with that. It was like she had no filter sometimes. Mostly because, well no one has any secrets around me.

"Yea what about them?"

"Did you see anything about me? Or you?"

"No Bella, why would you ask?"

She sat up facing me. She had a worried expression on her face that told me I hadn't done a good enough job of hiding my feelings around her. We were like open books to each other. Every day since I met her I've hated my life a little more. The person I felt so fated to be with was the one person I could not ever really have.

"Are you lying to me?"

"Yes."

"What did she see?"

"Me. Going to Denali. Me. Staying here with you. Forever."

I looked up at her. I couldn't say the words to her out loud. I hoped she see it in my eyes what I meant by forever.

"Oh, forever is a long time."

"Longer than you can imagine. I feel like I've lived forever already."

She laid her head back on my shoulder. I didn't understand why she hadn't taken off running. She just clung to me more.

"Forever would be nice. If it were with you."

"Bella, you don't know what you're saying. This isn't a game. This isn't some kind of sick joke I'm playing on you. "

She just didn't seem to understand. It was like I told that I had the flu. My being a vampire didn't faze her at all. I realized then that she was too comfortable around me. And her comfort would cause her to be careless. Her carelessness would get her hurt. My heart was shredded into pieces. To keep her safe I had to get away. I had to stay away from her. Keep my family away from her. Others visited our family at times. Others that didn't live the way we did. My mind started racing as I thought of one of us picking up her scent and finding her at home.

"Bella I should get you home."

"Edward its only 10. What's wrong?"

"Bella you don't know what you're saying. I don't know what I would do if something happened to you. This is serious and you act like what I am… What my family is… isn't an issue. Don't you realize I could snap at any moment? That anyone in my family could. There are others out there. They come here. If you're around… I don't even want to think about what could happen."

I could see the tears welling up in her eyes. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders. Her slender legs stuck out from beneath her skirt were curled underneath her.

"Edward… what… what are you saying?"

"I don't think that we should be together. It isn't safe for you."

"But, I love you Edward. It doesn't matter to me what you are. I know you heart. I know you. You would never hurt me. And neither would your family. You've been around humans for years. You… you go to school with them every day. Why am I any different?"

"Bella, I love you. You are my life, but I'm dangerous. I'm too dangerous for you."

Bella stood up in my face. He fist were clenched and straight down at her sides. She stared deep into my eyes. She looked so angry. There was no hurt in her eyes. Just anger. Pure anger at me. All I wanted to do was grab her and kiss her. Take back what I said. I never wanted her to look at me like she hated me but I was doing this for her own good.

"Bella…"

"No. No Edward. Don't Bella me… not right now. You have no right."

"What are you talking about?"

"I decide for myself Edward. Don't you dare undermine my intelligence Edward Anthony Cullen. I know full well what you are and it isn't a concept beyond comprehension… to speak in your terms…I'm not an idiot. I trust you."

Her eyes softened and she grabbed my hands in hers. She stepped in close to me. Her body pressed up against mine and her scent washed over me. I could feel myself weaken for her.

"I trust you with my life Edward. The more I see you the more trust you. I know that you love me and would never hurt me. And I would never let you hurt yourself in hurting me. We can't be apart Edward. You feel it as much as I do. You are my other half… I can't let you go…

My normal hesitation was gone. I was gravitating to her will… I grabbed Bella's shoulders crushing her lips to mine. She reached up wrapping her arms around my neck throwing her body weight onto me. I couldn't believe I had entertained the thought of leaving her behind. Who was I kidding? I couldn't be away from her.

We laid out on the blanket, Bella on top of me, our legs entwined. I could hear her heart in pounding in her chest. The sound of it hypnotizing me. She leaned up straddling my waist, her eyes greedy with lust bore deep into mine. Her skirt was pushed up around her waist and I could see the tiny blue lace panties she wore. The wind blew and her scent washed up over my face. I closed my eyes biting my lip and reveled in it. It was the most intoxicating smell to me next to her blood.

Bella took over her shirt. She looked like a goddess. My goddess.

I sat up bringing my lips to hers. She kissed me passionately pressing her body hard up against mine. She skin was hot and all I wanted was to feel her skin on my skin. I took Bella's hands putting them to my shirt. She ripped the tie from around my neck and with her delicate hand ripped my shirt open. Our tongues wrestled inside her mouth and she murmured something about making me pay for that argument. She pushed my tongue from her mouth and ran hers over my bottom lip. Her fingers made a long scratch down my back and even though it didn't hurt I arched my back into her. The feeling of her warm breast pressed against my hard chest was making me hard and I knew she could feel it.

I grabbed her by her hair laying her down. I knew she had wanted me to touch her. Tonight I wanted to feel that heat. That heat from her now dripping wet center. I laid her on her back and lay at her side putting my knee in-between her legs to move them apart. She had her eyes closed and her back arched gripping my shoulders as I kissed from her lips to her neck to her chest. My hands were slowly but firmly massaging her breasts and she was writhing in pleasure at my touch. Her breaths were short and I could tell she was anticipating my hand moving further south.

I moved my head back up to her face turning it sideways with mine. She was panting now as my hand moved molasses slow down her stomach I could feel her quivering beneath my hand. It made me even harder knowing I was having this effect on her. I pushed my hardness against her leg. She pushed back slowly moving it up and down stroking me. I held back a moan.

"Edward…don't stop tonight okay. I want this…I want you… please touch me."

"I want your kiss… but I want it too much…I whispered in her ear. He lips started to quiver and I grabbed them between mine.

"You're a vision of perfection laying next to me… Let me stroke the flame…we'll ride into oblivion and never be the same…"

She gasped at my forwards words and turned her face to me kissing me hungrily. My hand hovered just above her warmth. He legs were shaking with anticipation. I slowly stuck my hand into her panties. The heat was amazing. I touched her softly at first running my finger up her slit. She was so wet. I pulled away from her face as my mouth started to water. Her body was shaking beside me. I ran my fingers along her folds and she writhed against my body moaning softly into my shirt. I slowly penetrated her opening with my middle finger. She was as soft and warm on the inside as she was outside.

Slowly I pumped my finger in and out of her. Her breaths were short and fast. Her sex was tight around my finger. She was so tight I knew there was no way I was getting what I really wanted tonight. We would have to work up to that. But I didn't care. Seeing my beautiful Bella lose control at my touch was the most pleasurable thing I had experienced thus far. I started a rhythm between my finger and rubbing her swollen clit with my thumb. He legs were shaking and she began wildly squirming next to me. I was so engrossed with what I was doing I didn't feel her tiny hand undo my pants. She somehow managed to stick her hand right down into them and was now resting her hand on my hard cock. It twitched beneath her and she grabbed it like it was a wild garden snake. I groaned and pressed my lips back into her. She reached her hand inside my boxers grabbing me. A deep growl escaped me and she smiled into my lips.

Her hand began moving slowly up and down changing the pressure of her grasp as she went. She would stop and roll her thumb over the tip every time I did it to her. Soon we were on the same rhythm kissing and moaning into each others mouths. I could feel myself getting close and was so not up for a repeat of the car incident. I don't think I could sit through another week of constants jokes.

I stuck another finger into Bella quickly. She gasped and bit my lower lip and her hand clenched up around me. The pressure was almost too much but I got control of myself quickly. I started a slow pace so I didn't hurt her and she matched it. I realized then that she was mirroring my actions and anything I wanted I had to give to her.

"Do you want it harder Bella"

"Ugh…. yes…. Yes Edward harder."

I pumped my fingers with my force and her hand followed suit. I stopped for a second pulling her panties down around her knees and she pulled my from my constraints. The mix of the cool air against me and her warm skin was almost enough to send me over the edge and I knew I couldn't hold out much longer"

"Faster Bella?"

"Yes.. Ed.. fas…plea…oh god…"

She was incoherent and I knew she was close. I moved my fingers faster in and out of her. Her back arched off the ground. She grabbed my bottom lip in hers and began sucking it as hard as she could. He body was shaking and I could feel muscles tighten around my fingers. God bless her she never let go of me. As an orgasm took over her body she tightened her grip around me. Her juices dripped out over my fingers and her heart thudded in her chest as she screamed out my name sending me over the edge. I twitched in her hand and the muscles in my body clenched up as I released. I didn't see where it shot.

Bella's body collapsed against the floor and she curled up to me. I could feel her heart slowing in her chest. I swept the hair from her face kissing her cheek softly. She cooed and I felt her eyelashes sweep my collar bone as she closed her eyes.

"Thank Edward"

"I'm sorry for what I said Bella. I love you. I can't leave you. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Shh it's okay Edward. I know. I love you to."

She clung to my body and that's when I saw it. I couldn't keep from laughing.

She pushed away from me…Anger in her eyes again.

"And just what is so damn funny"

"Bella honey, my cum is in your hair."

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**A/N Be honest... did you get scared for a minute???? As a special treat i have deciced that on every occasion possible there is going to be some lemon action. Its a promise.**

**Let me know what you think. Also my sis said soemthing about Rob not doing Breaking Dawn because his contract only covers the first 3 movies. If anyone has any news on this....for the love of god please let me know. Thats like them taking Daniel Radcliffe out of Harry Potter. Also please leave reviews.. Tell me what you want more of or less or... or just say hi...also any songs you would like lyrics pulled from...  
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	14. The things we didnt talk about

**A/N I just want to thank everyone for the reviews. I really appreciate it. This next chapter is a Bella and Alice moment. And while it isnt as exciting as the last one, some of Edwards past gets brought up that is going to be important for future chapters. So enjoy.**

**Discaliamer: ---I dont feel the need to do this anymore. You all already know Twilight isnt mine.**

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**The Things We Didnt Talk About**

**BPOV**

Charlie acknowledged my return with nothing more than a grunt as I walked up the stairs. Tonight had been amazing. Meeting Esme, the walk the forest, the moonlight glistening off the brook. Most of all… the new level of intimacy Edward and I had experienced. The way his cold touch felt to me. The way it felt inside me trying to "stroke the flame" as he put it. I smiled to myself as I thought of how Emmett had looked at him as he walked me to the bathroom to wash him from my hair. I knew some silent exchange was passing between them at my expense but I was to busy floating on clouds to care.

I fell into bed letting sleep take over me. Edward was going hunting that tonight. He would be gone for the rest of the weekend. So I was to hang out with Alice, something I hadn't really done all week. I didn't realize how much I missed her. She was a handful and I knew I needed all the rest I could get.

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I felt something poking me as I was waking up. I tried smacking it away; my dream was too good. Edward and I on a beach, the sun glistening off his skin, and he was smiling. There was none of the worry on his face that I was used to seeing, he looked genuinely happy. I longed to see that.

"Bella, come on… how long do I have to poke at you to get you to wake up." It was Alice .I opened one eye and she was sitting at the end of my bed.

"Alice what are you doing here, what time is it?.

"Its 10 am. You've slept enough. Now come on, get up, get dressed so we can go… we've got a lot to do today, so lets go , lets get a move on. Get up! Get up! Get up!" She shoved my shower bag and a towel at me and pulled me out of bed.

"Okay okay Alice I'm goin. How did you get in here anyway, does my dad know you're here?"

"As a matter of fact he does. I properly introduced myself to him and used the front door like a well-behaved child should… unlike some people who like to sneak into their girlfriend's window at night." She smirked and we both kind of laughed. I wondered if she knew about last night, but her face gave nothing away.

I showered quickly walking backing to into my room to get dressed. Alice had sat out an outfit for me. Part of me was getting used to this, never having to pick out my own clothes. Alice was rummaging through my cd collection while I got dressed. "Decent collection You and Edward have more in common than I thought."

"Why do you say that?"

"You have a lot of the same stuff. He loves music if you hadn't noticed. And books too. You guys were made for each other. I can already see it."

She was sitting on my window sill as she was saying this. There was a hint of sadness in her eyes, I was going to ask what was wrong but something inside me told me I already knew. I thought it best not to bring it up. She slapped her hand on her thighs and her face changed from a frown to the big warm smile I was used to.

"All ready to go?" she asked me. Just from the look on her face I could tell this was gonna be one hell of a day. We ran out and got in the car after a quick goodbye to Charlie.

"So what are we doing today?" she was driving almost as fast as Edward did. "Well, you need to eat, Edward made me promise to not to forget to feed you so before I do we should get that out of the way. What do you want?

"Anything is fine, Im not picky." We stopped at a Dunkin Doughnuts drive through and hopped on the highway to Port Angeles.

"Why are we going to Port Angeles?"

"What do people go to Port Angeles for? "She held up a credit card and tossed it at me. I picked it up and saw that it had Edwards name on it.

"We're going shopping?"

"Of course silly. When you roll with the Cullen's, there are certain things you are just going to have to get used to doing, and the number one is shopping with me."

"I have my own money you know, I don't really feel comfortable spending his money." She laughed at me. "Trust me, Edward had a disposable income and he needs to spend it or people will start to notice so get any and everything you want. New Car?"

I thought she was kidding until she pulled into a Chevy dealership. She hopped out of the car before I could protest and walked inside. I ran up behind her and grabbed her hand. "Alice are you crazy?"

She laughed again. He laugh was so light and musical you couldn't help but smile when you heard it. "Don't worry Bella; we're here for Jaspers anniversary gift. He's obsessed with that yellow camero from the transformers movie so I thought I'd get him one." Alice ordered the car and it amazed me that someone could just walk into a store and buy anything they wanted. I wondered what that felt like.

As soon as we were done there we went straight to the mall. Alice blasted Blaqk Audio the whole way there singing along with Davey Havok and I couldn't help but be shocked at how pretty her we got inside Alice's eyes lit up.

"Where do you wanna go first Bella, I was thinking we'd do Victoria's Secret first since I usually take the longest time there."

I was about to protest when my purse started vibrating. Everlong was playing from inside my purse and I reached inside finding a tiny green phone. "What the hell is this?"

"What does it look like? It's a cell phone silly. Answer it." I looked at the screen and it was Edward making a silly kiss face at me. I smiled to myself before answering. He was so sweet.

"Hello love, are you having a good time with Alice?" "So far. Do you know I have you credit card?"

"Who do you think gave it to her?"

"Oh, well Edward I don't really need anything but thank you anyway." "Bella, I insist. Treat yourself to whatever you want. Its just a shame I cant be there with you… but after last night… well you know.." I smiled again to myself as a flash from last night played in my head. I looked over at Alice who was smiling to and I knew then that she was aware of what happened.

"Now have fun and don't worry about how much you spend."

"Well is there anything that you need? I'd feel better if I could get something for you too." He was silent on the other end for a moment. "You know that red bra you have, you know the one you had on when we were in the car?" "Um…. Yea, what about it?" "That made you breasts look amazing. Buy one just like it in black." He hung up the phone and I could feel the blood rush to my face.

"Well, you heard the man… lets go." She dragged me over to Victoria's Secret. Alice walked around for a while picking through this and that but I was to nervous to look around. Everything was so revealing and the thought of actually wearing it was making me embarrassed. Let alone the fact that Edward would see it and his sister would know. She walked over handing me a modest looking slip type thing. The material was silky. It was actually very pretty.

"Edward likes black underwear. But he also loves your skin." She pulled the slip away from me and handed me something with much less material.

"Alice I cant wear this. There is hardly anything to actually wear."

"Don't be silly Bella; you'd look sexy in this… besides this isn't the type of thing you wear for very long anyway." A sly smile crossed her face and she pushed me towards a dressing room. She walked into the one next to me and I heard her changing. I slowly got out of my clothes and felt another wave of embarrassment as I attempted to put on the little outfit but couldn't figure it out.

"Um Alice, I don't really know what im doing over here. I don't know how to put this g-string thing on" She giggled and popped her head over the wall. I quickly cover my damn near exposed chest. "Oh Bella don't be silly, we're both girls here." I dropped my shirt and handed her the underwear and she handed them back to me the correct way.

Looking in the mirror I didn't know how I felt. I knew this was a sexy outfit. I felt sexy in it. I grabbed my hair in my hands and lifted it up turning in the mirror to get the full picture.

"Edward likes your hair down. And you look hot by way. See I told you" Alice had popped her head over the wall again and she was smiling at me.

"I actually kind of like it, it's a bit trashy but I like it." "

Good so will he. Now give me your phone." I handed he the phone and she turned the camera side towards me. "No! No way Alice."

"Oh come on Bella, I send Jasper sexy pictures all the time." "You mean you guys actually show up in pictures," I asked her sarcastically. She glared at me for a moment but with a smile on her face so I knew she wasn't offended. "Just put you leg up on the bench and show me your thigh. Edward told Jasper he loves you thighs so we'll send him that." I felt a rush of embarrassment come over me as I realized Edward must talk about me with his brothers, all guys are the same. I obliged propping my leg up on the bench letting my hand rest on it. She snapped the picture and sent it.

No sooner than I had put my clothes back on did I get a text back from Edward: Mmmmm… I think im gonna come home early.

I sent him back: wait till you see the rest of the outfit.

He sent back: I cant wait.

We rang up our purchases and continued our shopping. I remember to buy the bra that Edward asked me to get and Alice suggested I buy dark blue one as well so I did. It was nice being with Alice, we talked about classes, what teacher we liked and didn't like, her and Edwards's family, her and Jasper. I could tell she really loved him. You would have to really love someone to be with them for that long.

We walked into the food court so I could eat and I decided that once we sat down out of earshot of other people I needed her to answer some questions for me. She was skimming through a cookbook she had picked up when I joined her.

"How do you feel about goat meat?"

"I'm sorry what?" "Goat. Do you eat it?"

I realized she then she got the cookbook for my benefit. "Um no, Im more of a chicken, pork, and beef kinda girl, but thanks"

She closed th book and look at my plate. "Ugh, how do you eat that stuff? It smells awful." She turned her nose away from my food. "It smells fine to me. Anyway, can I ask you a question Alice?"

"You just did", she answered sarcastically. The she sighed and said, "Go ahead; I was prepared for this anyway."

"Did you see me coming?"

"No, I didn't see you coming. When you were in the cafeteria your first day, I saw Edwards reaction to you. I tried to get him to go home but he wouldn't. It's difficult to watch the actions of another vampire, our thought process is much faster than yours and he kept flipping back and forth between attacking you, he almost did once but stopped himself, and kissing you, he was gonna leave but then he changed his mind. By the end of your bio class, well, he really just wanted to kiss you. We made fun of him for it."

I sat there stunned for a minute. He had told me his first reaction to me was to bite me. But it was harder hearing from someone else. To think that I had come so close to my death and was completely oblivious vexed me.

"What's in Denali? Edward told me that you saw him going to Denali." She looked at me then away from me for a moment. "Um, cousins."

"You have cousins?"

"Well we consider them cousins. They follow our way of life and are like the only other ones we know of so we stay close."

"Is there anything else in Denali? The way he said it, it was like he was implying something."

"Um, okay, lets see, Edward has a… Well see he was kind of…Maybe you should ask him." The way she was stumbling over her words told me it was something more serious than just family.

"Alice you're my best friend. You can tell me."

"Oh, okay fine. Edward has an ex-girlfriend. One of the cousins. She lived with us for awhile as his mate but it didn't work out. He didn't feel for her the way she wanted him and to and she had a certain desire that he couldn't fulfill. "

"What kind of desire?"

"He wouldn't have sex with her. Edward is very old fashioned when it comes to that kind of stuff. Where as for Tanya-that's her name Tanya- lust and love are two completely different things, for Edward they are one in the same. He didn't love her so he didn't lust after her either."

Edward had never told me he had a vampire ex-girlfriend that he had lived with. I was instantly jealous and a little hurt that he would keep that kind of thing from me. I had been completely honest when he asked me about my past relationships. All two of them.

"Bella, I can see that you are upset. Tanya, she didn't really mean anything to him. It was a big ordeal, she cheated on him, a lot, with a lot of different types of people, and then insulted his um, masculinity, suggested maybe he was really gay and he called her a whore, which is so unlike him, and then he left. For a while. Esme was distraught, she went looking for him but no once could find him anywhere and then he sent us a letter saying that he wouldn't come home until she was gone. It was a hard decision to make, but Esme wanted her son back so Carlisle asked Tany to go to Denali. And Edward came home."

"Poor Esme, is Edward like her favorite or something?" "Human years wise, he's the youngest out of all of us, so he's like her baby. And honestly I think it's because he's been alone all this time. We all have someone and he's been alone. She feels bad. That why she's so happy that he has you now. In her words she wouldn't care if you were a rock. She just wants him to be happy."

I thought about how warmly she accepted me. How comfortable I felt in her presence after only a few minutes, she was all smiles looking at was lost in thought for a moment so I took it upon myself to scarf down some of my food. I stopped mid chew when Alice started speaking again.

"You know, you and Edward seem to fit together so well. I mean I saw it, for a moment when we were in the cafeteria that day, I saw it. A genuine smile on his face, looking at you in the future somewhere. He looked so elated that, I guess he was right, I ran with the thought of him being that happy. Aside from Jasper, I love Edward that most, and if I thought for one second that he could have even a fifth of the happiness that I have, I'd do anything in the world to give it to him. That's why I talked to you; I wanted him to see it was okay, but now that I think about it. It's a little unfair to both of you. I almost wish you were one of us, don't ever tell him I said that by the way."

I choked down my food with tears in my eyes, I had thought the same thing, and I knew he did too.

"Im glad we're friends though. Even if Edward didn't come around, its nice having a friend outside my little world to do normal things with. Jasper isn't used to this way of life enough to do all the things that I can do with you and Rosalie has no real interest."

"Um Alice, Edward also said something about you seeing us together, forever." I said forever the same way that he did so she would know that I knew what he meant. She looked into my eyes for a moment before she answered and I could see she was considering what to tell me. She opened her mouth to speak three times and closed it before she answered.

"Sorry, Bella. Im not goin there. What I see is subjective. The future can always change. And I don't see that anymore. At least not right now. Edward loves you to much to take your life from you. None of us would wish this life on anyone. We don't really want this for you."

"What if I want it?"

"Bella, I love you. And Edward loves you too. But Human feelings, no offense are flighty, I don't doubt you love my brother. But living is a lot to give up for a person. And you don't know how you're gonna feel in a year or two."

"I have a feeling that I do. But I wont push the issues with you. I'll speak to Edward about it."

"Bella, don't. Trust me. This isn't something he'll want to hear from you. He'll leave you. Trust me." She recounted he argument they had concerning me. I felt bad that I had caused so much turmoil in their peaceful household.

"Its too late for you guys to turn back now. I see that. So my advice is to just enjoy him for as long as you can. Edward is resolved to staying with you for as long as you want him to stay, as long as its safe, and once you decide to go…he wont stand in your way." She smiled tenderly touching my hand.

I thought over what she said as I sipped my smoothie. I knew in my heart that I would not change the way I feel about him. And she was right, my feelings were to deep already to turn away from him now.

* * *

**A/n so Edward has more secrets. Will they come back to haunt him... we'll have to see. Is Bella, going to take Alice's advice and not talk to him about being changed.... and if she does... how will he react. Only i know... you'll have to read more to find out.**


	15. Control

**A/N Happy 4th Everyone!!!**

* * *

**Control**

**BPOV**

I needed some time to think things over after my shopping trip with Alice so I called Edward and asked him not to come over when he came home. He sounded disappointed and wanted to know what Alice and I had talked about that I all of a sudden didn't want to see him. I have always been terrible at lying but I somehow managed to convince him that I needed to get some homework done uninterrupted.

Sunday I bopped around the house cleaning and doing laundry. I actually did get some homework done and before I knew it the day was over. As I was lying in bed it occurred to me that no one in school knew me and Edward were together. I fell asleep thinking about how hectic the next day would be.

When I woke up the Monday morning Charlie was already gone. I put on one of my new outfits: a tight pair of dark blue jeans and cream low cut sweater. I headed out the door to my truck, the fog was so thick that I didn't notice until I got to the driveway that Edward was sitting in front of my house. He rolled down the window smiling.

"Ride with me?" he asked as if I'd say no. I jogged to his car slipping in the wet grass a little.

"New outfit?", he asked.

"Yea, you like it?" He looked me over as I got in the car. He was also wearing one of the new shirts I had picked up for him.

"Yea, you look hot." He smiled suggestively at me and stuck his finger in the front of my shirt pulling it out a little so he could look inside.

"Anything in there for me?" I blushed and nodded. He smiled and licked his lips.

**EPOV**

She was wearing that "come get a piece" bra that I liked and the black in contrast with her pale skin was turning me on. I hadn't seen her in two days and I missed her. I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and as she shut the door I was whacked in the face by her scent. It hit me like a sledgehammer. I could feel my eyes turning black and my mouth fill with venom. I shut my lips tightly and moved away from her.

"Edward, are you okay?" she asked me. Her face twisted up with worry as she moved against the door.

"Im fine Bella, roll your window down", I barked at her as I rolled down mine and took off towards the school. The air rushing in my face beat her scent away but I could still smell it lingering. She tried to put her hand on my leg but moved it when I went rigid.

"Not having a good morning hunh?"

"Sorry, I think we were apart for to long. I should have come while you were asleep last night."

"It's okay, im not afraid."

"You should be." She glared at me from the corner of her eyes. She looked angry.

"Yeah well im not so deal. Anyway, how was your hunting trip? Who did you go with? Alice never told me."

"Esme forced me and Rosalie to spend sometime together. We had a fight and she wanted us to make up?" "I heard. I'm sorry. Is everything okay now?"

"Things are as good as they are going to be with her for now. Ignore her for the most part. I always do"

I couldn't help being upset at Alice for telling her. Bella had enough to worry about. I started wondering what else she had told her. She left as soon as I walked in the door and spent the whole morning counting in Japanese. What was she hiding? Bella's voice broke my concentration.

"Do you realize that no one in school knows about us? I never said anything. Do you think its going to be weird?"

"Probably, although people already had suspicions for a while. If anything, it'll keep all the hormonal teenage boys away from you."

By this time we had pulled into the parking lot at school. My car was the only one in the student lot so I figured I'd get a jumpstart and seeing Bella's bra. I rolled the windows up on the car. The dark tints would insure that no one would see inside. Bella looked at me all wide-eyed and confused; I smiled gently stroking her face so she would know I was okay.

"So we're okay now?"

"More than okay", I said as I kissed her hand. I turned it over pushing her sleeve up putting my lips to her wrist. I could feel her pulse quicken and I noticed she was grabbing the handle on the door. It looked like she was trying to get away so I dropped her hand.

"Am I scaring you?" "No, no Edward. Im not scared. Im just trying…" I cut her off. "Its okay, you can tell me if I scare you Bella. I need to know so I can stop what ever it is that im doing."

"Edward I was trying to lock the door", she said as she pushed me back against my seat and climbed over onto my lap.

Her lips came crashing down on mine with such ardor that I got the feeling there was something more behind her kiss. I grabbed her putting my hands underneath her shirt pressing my fingers into her burning skin.

"Don't tear it" she said into my mouth. We had a nasty habit of ripping each others clothes. I thought for a moment that if we were this passionate with her being human how much better it would be if she were like me, and I didn't have to hold back. I groaned and let that thought slip from my mind.

He fingers slipped into my hair and she was panting trying to catch her breath. I took this opportunity to slip the sweater over her head. Her full breast bounced out of the shirt and I felt myself getting hard at the sight of them. I loved Bella's entire body but her tits, ass, and thighs were my favorite. I may not be human but im still a man.

She gasped as I placed a kiss on her right breast grabbing them in my hands. She pushed her self against my hardness and I could tell she was becoming aroused.

"Start your day off the right, the orgasm way" I joked and she chuckled looking down at me. He pupils were dilated and almost as black as mine. She leaned down to kiss me and rocked her waist back. Her ass hit my horn and it let out a loud and long honk.

"_What the hell are you guys doing in there?"_

"_Damn Ed, its 8 a.m. in the morning man. I don't think I can go through the whole day smelling her all over you"._

"_Bra working Eddie?"_

Rose, Emmett and Alice were all looking in the direction of my car. Suddenly I felt a wave of lust and Bella grabbed my face crushing her lips to mine. We were lost in a kiss for a moment and it wasn't until we were clawing at each others pants buttons that I realized where it was coming from.

"_Just trying to help you out. I know you don't take long. Figure you could get one in before class" _Jasper was laughing at me in his head. I growled and said low enough that only he and my other siblings would hear: cut it!

**BPOV**

I didn't know what came over us in that moment but I didn't complain. I pulled my shirt back on and fixed my hair as we got out of the car. We walked towards his siblings who were standing at the Rosalie's candy apple red BMW smirking at us. I saw Edward glaring at Jasper who was laughing as we walked over and I knew he had something to do with what had happened in the car.

"Good Morning Bella?" Alice asked my questioningly and she winked. I smile and said good morning to everyone. Rosalie glared at me for a moment. "Good Morning Bella. How was your weekend?"

I could tell that she was attempting to be nice so I put on my best smile and told her it was nice and that I hoped she would come with Alice and I the next time we went out. She smiled a little and nodded. Emmett rubbed her back. We all stood there talking while the lot started to fill up. I was used to people staring at me when I was with the Cullen's but when Edward grabbed my bag from me and put his arms around my waist I saw people gasp. He leaned down and kissed the top of my head telling me today was going to be an interesting day. All around me I could feel people, girls mostly glaring at me while we walked towards my locker.

"Be prepared for an ambush first period Bella."

He walked me to my first period class and handed me my books. I looked up at him a little nervous honestly because I didn't know what to expect. He planted at quick kiss on my lips a little harder than I expected. I rocked back on my heels but he caught me before I could fall and pushed me towards class.I sat down and immediately Jessica and Lauren were at my side. "What's goin on with you and Edward?" Lauren asked me. She looked like she wanted to hit me. Jessica just had a look of pure jealousy on her face. I remember Edward telling me that she tried to get with him several times since he's lived here.

"Um, what do you mean?" I asked trying to play coy. Lauren stood up and put her hand on the table. "What do you mean what do I mean? You and Edward Cullen." She was talking loud enough for the whole class to hear. Everyone who didn't completely turn around clearly stopped talking so they could listen in.

"I don't think that's any of your business Lauren." Jessica looked from her to me and attempted to smile at me. "Oh, come on, if you two are friends its okay. We know you're real close with his sister. We saw you at the mall on Saturday."

"Yea, what's he being like your bodyguard or something? That whole thing with Mike was bogus and you know it." I was fuming. No one had brought up what happened that night all week and I did not want to hear anymore about it. I stood up in Laurens face. "Like I said, what's going on between me and Edward is none of you fucking business, but if you're so anxious to know… He's my boyfriend okay."

A feeling of happiness came over me as I realized that I was the first time I had actually said it out loud. Edward was my boyfriend. He could have any girl in the world that he wanted, but he chose me. I sat down triumphantly and looked at Jessica sitting there with her mouth open looking stupid.

"You should close your mouth before you start drooling Jessica." I said laughing to myself. Lauren just scowled at me. She was green with jealousy. "Liar. He probably just feels sorry for you. You're so pathetic Bella. Edward Cullen would never actually date you. You're probably just sleeping with him or something. You'll see…it won't last long."

I was trying to hold onto my confidence but what she said kind of broke through. He had already tried to break up with me once, part of me wondered if she was right. I mean it wouldn't be for the reasons they would think but it could happen none the less.

Right after she said that, my phone that had been sitting on the desk started to ring. Everlong played and I knew without even having to look at it that was Edward and he'd heard what she said and was texting me to save the day. Both Lauren and Jessica looked down at the phone that had his kissy face showing and Lauren grabbed it before I could get to hit. She flipped it over reading the text:_ I miss you already my love. Love you and I'll see you after class. _Lauren rolled her eyes and tossed the phone back at me. The bell rang and she and Jessica sulked back to their seats.

As Edward said, he was waiting outside class for me. The rest of the day went pretty much the same: Random people asking me if we were going out and scowling when I said yes, him waiting outside each class for me with a hug and a kiss as if to drive the point home. I sat at the Cullen table at lunch with all eyes on us. Apparently people were curious enough about us to ask the rest of the Cullen's about our new relationship.

Finally the end of the day came and I was wiped out. So many people questioned me about Edward and me that I was thoroughly annoyed. All I wanted to do was to get home. When I walked out of gym Edward was standing there waiting for me and a wave of relief washed over me. He had gone to my locker for my books and was ready to go.

"Ready to get home Bella, Alice and Jasper are riding with us." "God, yes. I'm worn out. All I wanna do is go home, curl up in my bed, and take a nap." Edward gave me a disappointed little smile and before I could speak his body was pressed up against mine and my back was to the lockers.

"Are you sure you want to curl up in _your _bed?" he asked me as his traced the side of my face with his nose. I started to get lightheaded as he ran his cold lips softly over mine back and forth trying to coax and answer from me. I grabbed a hold of his biceps pulling him closer to me. "Your…your...bed... is good…too" He chuckled under his breath and came down to my eye level. His eyes seemed to smolder as he stared deep in to my eyes. He pressed his lips firmly to mine pulling my waist to him. He exhaled through his nose and his sweet scent clouded my thoughts. Edwards lips moved to my ear and his voiced deepened as he growled quietly in my ear. "I've been thinking about you all day" he whispered in my ear as his hand crept up my side. "I want to finish what we started this morning Bel_la" he said separating my name into two syllables. His thumb ran over my breast and a low groan escaped my lips. He ran his thumb back over it applying a little pressure over my nipple as he kissed me softly on the lips. I felt and odd burning sensation in my chest and my vision faded out to black.

**EPOV**

"Bella?" "Bella open your eyes." In my attempt to tease my poor Bella she had forgotten to breathe and blacked out momentarily.

"What, what happened?" she asked me through short breaths. "Um, you kinda blacked out. I guess im better at this seduction thing than I thought I was." She was leaning on her knees looking up at me incredulously. "Uh yeah, you think?" "Sorry Love, how else was I going to persuade you to come home with me?" She stood up and punched me in the arm, "You could have just asked."

The four of us drove home, Jasper and I in the front. Alice and Bella sat in the back. She was still kind of mad at me but I knew it wouldn't last for long. Jasper was sending lust waves throughout the car and I could see Bella shifting uncomfortably in the seat. To tease her even more, at every red light I revved the engine making the car vibrate a little. She was silent most of the ride biting into her bottom lip that I hoped would soon be between mine. I didn't even get a chance to turn off the car before Alice and Jasper jumped out running at vampire speed to their room leaving Bella with her jaw dropped in the backseat.

"You'll get used to it", I said as I helped her out of the car.

"Sometimes I forget you know. You guys seem so normal…for the most part." I pressed my body against Bella pressing her into the car. She looked up at me a nervously. "Never ever forget what I really am Bella, that would be a stupid mistake on your part" I said before crushing my lips onto her. She went rigid instinctively before wrapping her arms around my neck. I lifted her up from the waist and her legs wrapped around me like a vice. I ran up to my room at vampire speed dropping her on my bed. She landed with a huff her eyes blinking wildly.

Before she could speak my tongue was in her mouth silencing her. Her tiny fingers worked the buttons on my shirt. I closed my eyes reveling in the scent of her arousal that was hitting me in waves. Her breathing erratic as our tongues wrestled each other inside her warm mouth. She moaned as I moved between her legs pressing stiff cock onto her.

I came to the realization that Bella like it when I was aggressive. I felt the warmth of her hands as she pushed my shirt over my shoulders her fingers trailing slowly down my arms. It felt like she was setting me on fire.

I pulled away from her running my hand up her stomach underneath her sweater. She looked up at me, her deep brown eyes heavy with desire as I pushed her shirt up exposing her plump breasts. She pulled the sweater off tossing it over her head. She smiled sexily at me biting into her bottom lip. I groaned as I felt my cock flex against my pants.

"You're so fucking hot", I said as I came down over her. Our lips attacked each other for a moment as curled my arms underneath her shoulders pressing her body to me. Bella's fingers were tangled in my hair. She pulled my face sides ways as she alternated between kissing and biting my jaw line down to my neck. Her full warm lips stopped to gently suck the skin above where my pulse would be. I felt her teeth graves my skin sending shivers down my spine.

Pulling away from her I turned her face with my lips this time kissing down from her lips to the crook of her neck. I rolled my tongue over a collarbone once and she shivered whimpering out my name. I placed my lips on her neck careful not to let my teeth graze her. I could feel the blood boil beneath my lips. Bella grabbed my head pulling me more into her. I felt a familiar burning in the back of my throat. I looked up at her for a moment checking to see if she notice that my body had gone rigid and still in my attempts not to do what was so natural to me. She had not. Her eyes were closed lips slightly parted. All I could think was what a beautiful face to die with. If I were to die I would want it to be like this, thinking I was in ecstasy before the darkness came.

My mouth pooled with venom that I attempted to swallow back trying to regain my composure. With her being this turned her already delicious smelling blood had become irresistible to me. I gripped the sheets fighting with myself not to bite her but unable to pull my lips away. The muscles in my stomach tightened painfully. My whole body seemed to be fighting itself; my cock ached for her touch but my thirst… It was so bad. Bella's breathing had calmed. She laid there her arms limply wrapped around my back breathing deeply. I could feel the rise and fall of her chest against me. I had stopped breathing not wanting to take anymore of her scent in but I could already taste it.

I could hear Alice outside the door in my head._ Do you need me to come in?_ "No!" I barked out.

"Edward….Edward are you okay?"

"Don't. Move. Bella." I gruffly said into her neck. She quivered involuntarily beneath me. Her grip tightened around me in fright I could smell my poor Bella's fear. The venom kept coming and I kept swallowing it. Fighting back my thirst. Bella lay there holding her breath. Trying not to move like I had told her to. "Edward. Its okay, just relax. "

Her arms dropped from around me and she pressed them back at either side of her head on the bed. She looked like an offering. My mind was racing. The hunger... the thirst was unbearable. I could hear myself growling and once I realized I silenced myself quickly. I forced my lips back to Bella's harder than I normally would. My tongue forcefully parted her lips and she cautiously opened her mouth to let me. I felt tears running down her face and instantly hated myself. I had scared her enough to make her cry. I pulled my lips away from her looking down into her face. Her eyes were closed yet the tears still flowed from them. Her pink lips were slightly swollen from all the pressure I put on them. I felt her hand wrap around my back again and she brought her head up hiding in my shoulder.

She started crying hard. Her whole body shook as she sobbed loudly saying: Im sorry over and over. I pushed back into a sitting position pulling her into my lap.

"I'm so sorry Edward. I love you. I love you so much. Im so so sorry" she said as she wrapped her arms around my neck. I ran my fingers through her hair rocking her gently to try and calm her. "Bella, sweetheart, what are you sorry for. I should be the one apologizing not you. Please love stop crying."

Everything I had just felt a moment ago disappeared; it was like it never happened. All I could think about was my poor Bella crying her eyes out and wanting it to stop.

"Edward, im sorry. What did I do? Tell me what I did so I won't do it again." She pulled away from me so she could see my face. "Bella sweetheart that wasn't your fault. It's never going to be your fault love. It's me. It's what I am. You need to understand that. Please Please don't feel guilty." Her bottom lip quivered as she stopped crying. She moved off the bed to get her shirt. The look on her face was heartbreaking. It was a mix of sorrow and fear. I moved fast in front of her wrapping my arms around waist pressing my forehead to the warm skin on her bare stomach.

"I've never hated myself more than I do right now. I can't believe I just did that to you. Bella, Im so sorry. Please forgive me. Please please forgive me. I don't… I don't want you to be afraid of me. Ever. Please say you forgive me my love."

She came down and kissed the top of my head. I gripped her waist pulling her closer to me. Bella ran her fingers through my hair trying to calm me before she spoke. "It's okay Edward, Im not upset with you. I forgive you Edward. Don't beat yourself up about it. This kind of thing… I expected it to happen one day. Now we know you can control it." She put her hand underneath my chin so I would look at her.

"Really Edward. It's okay. We're going to be okay." One teardrop fell on face and she smiled so sweetly that for one second I actually believed her.

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**A/N Poor Edward and his never ending struggle. **

**So tell me what you thought....Kudasai....**


	16. Redemption

**A/N: I was going to wait to post this chapter but decided to go ahead and do it anyway. So enjoy. :)`**

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**Redemption**

**BPOV**

After Edwards's incident he was afraid to be alone with me. We spent the rest of the night downstairs on the couch. Alice kept a watchful eye over him and I assumed she had seen what happened. We drove back to my house in an uncomfortable silence. He promised to come back later in the night but he wanted to go and hunt beforehand. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't convince him that I was okay with what happened and that I wasn't afraid of him, he insisted that we not be physical like that for awhile.

That's what upset me the most. I had the greatest pleasure I had ever had with him for a few days and he took it away. We argued about it a few times. I insisted that he would be okay but he wouldn't give in to me. He wouldn't do anything more than kiss me and it was driving me nuts. He had no idea the affect he had on me. To make matters worse I was too afraid to "relieve" myself because I knew with his stupid vampire nose he would know and I would be mortified. So I went through the entire months of April and May and most of June painfully horny.

Instead we went on "dates". Edward would take me for runs in the woods. We would sit by the brook and talk about any and everything. We went to movies alone and with his family. He even came over and watched sports games with Charlie always excusing himself before dinner. I could see that Charlie was beginning to like him. He even invited him to go fishing a few times. It was odd to see my vampire boyfriend and his vampire father donning fishing gear and sitting on a boat with my completely oblivious father. A few times the whole family went and I would sit with Esme, Alice, and Rose in the grass watching the men in our lives talk sports and cars on a boat in the middle of a lake. Emmett was even a good enough sport to actually try some of the fish that Charlie had cooked up for us once.

Once June came and school was about to end I was getting anxious. Emotionally Edward and I had become ridiculously close. I had to admit that it was great but I missed the passion we had for each other over those few short days. It was still there, clearly the elephant in the room; when ever we were alone together but every time I "misbehaved" Edward would pull away leaving me with the female equivalent of blue balls and looking quite pained himself.

On the last day of school I woke up feeling relieved that my first year at Forks high school was over and I would be free to spend my summer however I pleased. Edward was not there when I woke up but he did leave a note saying he'd gone home to change and would be back to pick me up. It was a little warmer out today but there wasn't a hint of sunlight. Just the ever-present gray clouds silently threatening a downpour. I thought back to my first few days in forks and how I would feel depressed at the crappy weather and how those same clouds now made me ecstatic because that meant Edward and I would have a normal day outside. I dressed in Capri's and tank and went downstairs only to find Edward sitting at my kitchen table looking glum. I ran over peeking my head underneath his and kissed him on the lips.

"Edward, sweetheart, what's wrong?"

"Bella, we're going to have some visitors at the house for a few weeks."

"So I guess that means I can't come over for a while hunh. That's okay. That just means you'll have to come here more often." I answered him smiling trying to improve his mood.

"I actually think it would be best if you spent some time at my house. As much time as possible actually."

"Its other vampires coming I'm assuming. Why would you want me there?"

"They aren't a threat to you. At least not to your mortality."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I looked at him confused but then a memory slowly crept into my mind. A memory of a conversation I had a long time ago with Alice about another family of vampires that didn't prey on humans. The Cousins. To my knowledge Edward did not know that Alice told me about his past relationship. I never brought it up and neither did he. I saw this opportunity to see how truthful he would be with me so I said nothing about.

"So… who's coming Edward?"

"Cousins. Cousins from Denali."

"Okay, so why should I be there? I mean aren't you worried that I might be too much of a temptation?"

"No, our cousins have a certain penchant for cavorting around with humans…In a much more intimate way than even I have."

"Oh, you mean they have sex with humans?"

"Humans… other vampires. Animals too for all I know." "Okay, that still doesn't explain why you want me around as much as possible."

He squinted his eyes at me and I had the feeling he knew I was onto something. I turned my back grabbing a bowl out of the cabinet for cereal.

"Do I need to have a reason to spend as much time with my girlfriend as possible? Do I need a special reason to want to introduce you the rest of my family Bella?" he barked at me. I knew he wouldn't come out and say it and that pissed me off so badly that I slammed the cereal box down on the counter and turned to face him. I could feel the heat in my cheeks giving away that I knew he was keeping something from me. I wanted him to say it. I also didn't want to rat Alice out for telling me either.

"No. No _Edward_ you don't need a "special" reason at all. But the way you're sitting there all miserable looking implies there is some special reason why you want me around. I've kept no secrets from you about anything in my life. You know everything that I've ever done and everything that I plan to do. You know all my feelings. I tell you what Im thinking anytime you ask no matter how embarrassing it is. And here I stand getting the feeling that you have not done the same. Now why is that? Why can you trust me with the greatest secret of your life and yet you keep something from me. What ever it is it can't compare to the fact that you're a damned vampire!"

He looked out the window for a moment before exhaling heavily and turning back to me. He stood up slowly as though not to startle me. I could see a hint of anger in his eyes. He walked almost too slowly over to me and pulled my arms down to my side. I froze with confusion not knowing what was going to happen. He slowly brought his lips to the skin underneath my ear as he wrapped his arms around me so I couldn't move.

"What? What are you doing Edward?" I could feel tears welling in my eyes and I couldn't tell if they were from frustration or fear. Edward pressed his body against me pinning me to the counter so I couldn't get away. My heart beat increased and I started to get dizzy as his sweet redolence washed over me.

"I love you Isabella Marie Swan. With every fiber of my being I love you. You are my only reason for being alive…if that's what I am. You are my life now." He pulled back so he could look into my eyes while he spoke but I was still frozen where I stood. "Do you understand what Im saying to you? From the moment I laid eyes on you and realized that my yearning to be with you and love you was stronger than my thirst for your blood I knew my heart, my life would never be the same. Do you understand that? You are my Midnight Sun. Do you understand that Bella?" I strained to fight through the fog he was causing in my head but all I could muster was a nod or an okay.

"Do you love me Bella? Do you really love me the way you say you do?" I shook my head to clear my thoughts enough to answer him. "Unconditionally Edward. You know that."

"You love me even though you know what I really am? Even though you know on several occasions I've wanted to end your life? You still love me?" I attempted to wiggle out of his arms but he gripped me tighter. I knew something bad was coming that he wouldn't let me go. It's just an ex girlfriend. Sure I was mad that he'd never mentioned her and was attempting to evade doing it now but this was a bit much.

"Yes Edward. I still love you. I love you even more each day." "And you love me even though you know that Im a killer…that I've taken lives…Human lives."

"Yes Edward. I don't care about that. Who you were in the past is not who you are now. Your past means nothing to me. Just the here. The now." I knew I meant the words I spoke but I regretted saying them as soon as I did.

Edward moved his head to my ear and very calmly and quietly even though no one else was in the house to hear him said: "One of the cousins…Tanya… is my ex…" He squeezed me tighter against him and then whispered almost so low that I couldn't hear him: "My ex-fiancée"

**EPOV**

I fretted telling Bella about Tanya almost as much as I worried about telling her about my being a vampire. I couldn't look in here eyes as I told her even though I knew it was the cowardly way to do it. Carlisle told me I should just come out and tell her but it was so hard. I knew it would break Bella's heart and that she wouldn't understand that there was no love there on my part. Just a need to have someone.

Once the words came out I prepared for the worst. She held her breath standing motionless in my arms. Her face was turned away as if she couldn't stand to look at me. Again I slumped to my knees in front of her. I grabbed her hips my fingers digging into the soft flesh of her ass. I could hear her whimper and her stomach twitched as she softly cried above my head. I pressed my head to her stomach feeling almost as sorry as I did that day in my room. This time she did not say the words I needed her to say, and I could not ask her to. I honestly feared in that moment that she would turn me away and with the quickness that my mind worked I thought over the many ways that I would try to win her back…make it up to her. I also contemplated all the many ways I would try to end my life in the event that she would not take me back. Life was not worth continuing if I did not have her in it.

It seemed a lifetime that we stood there in her kitchen me on my knees pressed to her stomach…her hands on the counter behind her not touching me. I took it as a good sign she had not pushed me away yet but I wasn't going to take any chances. I would live here in the spot for the rest of eternity if it would keep her from saying the one thing I couldn't bare to hear. It was tearing me apart inside that I could not tell what she was thinking. Both of our phones were ringing off the hook. No doubt my family calling to see why we never showed up for school. I looked over at the clock. It was 10. We had been standing here for over two hours before she finally spoke.

"Did you love her?" she asked softly. I cold hear the hurt in her voice.

Still to afraid to move I answered her from my kneeling position. "No Bella. I didn't love her. Not at all." Her knees gave out and I moved back so she could sit in front of me. Her eyes were swollen and red cheeks stained from her salty tears. I wiped away what remained and she flinched away from me. I felt my cold heart slowly start crumble.

"Why didn't you tell me? You've told me things that were far worse but this you keep from me. Is it because you did love her?

"Bella, no… I didn't tell you because I didn't think you would understand."

"Understand what? That you were engaged to someone else. That you asked someone else to be your wife and you have never even once mentioned marriage to me…me who you claim you cannot live without? You're right Edward…I don't understand that", she spat.

Bella thought about marrying me. That warmed my heart in such a way that I could not understand. I had fought thoughts of Bella being my wife because it was too painful to think about but they slipped through anyway and I on thousands of occasions have pictured her dressed in white walking down and aisle to my hand.

"Bella, it was an engagement of convenience. My family attempted to push us together. I felt nothing for her but was tired of being alone. I thought that if we were married that my feelings would change, but she wanted things I physically wouldn't give to her. She sought her needs elsewhere and I realized that I could never be with her. I hated the thing that she was and I called off our engagement. We got into a huge argument and she attacked me trying to force herself on me. I fought her off and called her the whore my family knew that she was. She insulted me and I knew that we couldn't live under the same roof even as regular family so I went off on my own for a few years. The loneliness got to me and I missed my family desperately so I wrote them saying I wanted to come home and would only if she went to Denali and never tried to rejoin our immediate family. Carlisle and Esme sent her away and I came home. That was over 30 years ago Bella."

She looked at me incredulously. The amount of years probably shocked her. Tears continued to run down her face. She turned away from be breathing slowly. The silence was deafening. "What are you thinking Bella? Please tell me what you're thinking."

"Im thinking that you may have loved her. You may have loved her but you don't want to tell me that you did. And that" I attempted to interrupt her but she turned quickly placing her hand over my mouth rough and angrily. "Let me finish Edward. Don't interrupt me again." I nodded her hand still covering my mouth. In the past few hours where she refused to touch me I had missed her touch. I covered her handed with mine to feel more of her just in case.

Her eyes softened as she looked at me. Her voice was low and calm. "This is so unnerving… I know you've never lied to me before… but the things you're telling me… I can't yet me believe… yet can't ignore…but I'll just have to accept though my mind is so inept… and the only thing left to now it to trust you."

**BPOV**

Disbelief and anger coursed through me but from the look in his eyes I knew that he was telling me the truth. He had his reasons for why he did what he did and while I couldn't quite grasp them, I knew that it didn't matter. He was with me now. The here and now was all that mattered.

Coming up onto my knees I placed my hands on his shoulders. He tilted his head back so that I could kiss him. I crushed my lips hard into his putting as much passion into that I could so that he would know that I loved him and forgave him for what he did. His arms wrapped around me pulling me to him. I fought back the dizziness I always felt when we kissed the way and let all my body weight fall onto him.

He laid back on the floor pulling me over him lifting my shirt off me as he went. I slipped my hands underneath his pushing it up over his head. His hand gripped my ass and started massaging it as I kissed his face and his neck. I could feel his cold stomach beneath me and felt my self starting to shiver. Edward stood with me in his arms and before I could blink we were in my bed, the blankets pulled around me so I wouldn't freeze.

I ran my fingers through his hair as he kissed down my neck to my chest. My breathing became erratic as I realized we had not been this far since that day in his bedroom. I lifted my upper body off the bed as he unsnapped my bra pulling it off. His hand shot out off the bed and I watched him as he dropped it to the floor. I instinctively covered myself with my arms.

"Bella please," he said pulling my arms away. His voice was low and silky smooth as he whispered in my ear: "Let me see you." I let him pull my arms away and he pinned them at either side of my head. His eyes trailed down my body and I breathed hard emphasizing the rise and fall of my chest. His eyes started to darken and I could feel him becoming erect between my legs. His eyes didn't move from my chest and for a second I thought he was losing it again.

"Edward, are you okay. Do we need to stop?" He didn't bother to answer me. He looked into my eyes and they were smoldering. I could feel my mind haze over as he came down to kiss me cupping one of my breasts in his hands. Our tongues pushed against each other in my mouth. His cold fingers tips began to roll my nipple and I moaned loudly. His tongue ran over my collar bone then down between my breasts. His other hand held both of mine over my head. My body was completely at his will.

He began kissing my chest slowly and softly. My body trembled with the anticipation of where his lips would land next. "Ugh…Bella you have no idea how much I want you right now. I've missed your body so much" he said between kisses. His cool breath washing over me sent chills through to my core. I could feel myself becoming wet... no not wet that's not good enough…I was drenched. His head moved lower and lower as he kissed down my stomach. I felt his front teeth graze my stomach as he pulled my pants button between his teeth pulling it off. "God Bella, you smell so fucking good." His hand crept into my pants pulling them down in one swift movement.

He came back up to my lips positioning himself between my legs; I felt the coldness of his thigh against mine. My eyes gazed down to see his erection straining against his boxers. It occurred to me that I had no idea what it looked like.

I was on fire. I could feel my body shake with anticipation and I strained against his hold trying to get him in the right spot. My mind wasn't even aware of how loud I was moaning and panting as his hands ran over my entire body followed by his lips. He was teasing every inch of me and I couldn't take it anymore. I felt he cold breath on my hot wet sex and my body jerked violently. "Ugh Fuck… Edward!" I screamed as an unexpected orgasm ripped through my body.

His cold body came over me, lips crushing into mine as he silenced me holding my body still. "Jesus Bella…Calm Down.". My eyes popped open and he was staring down at me under his eyes lashes with that panty dropping half-smile painted on his face. I could feel my heart literally pounding in my chest.

"You don't know what you're doing to me" I whimpered. "Oh… I think I have an idea. I think have a very good idea and I didn't even have to read you mind."

His lips came down on mine once more sucking my bottom lip which now felt raw from me biting into it. I suddenly felt cold air on me and opened my eyes to see that Edward now had my panties between his teeth. It hadn't even registered in my brain that he had stopped kissing me. He starting rubbing his hard cock against me. I grabbed his waist trying to pull him onto me more. My eyes pleaded with him to just fuck the life out of me but he didnt notice. His eyes were shut tightly, his lips pulled back into his mouth. He wasnt breathing. He grazed my opening with his tip behind his boxers and the sensation sent another silent orgasm thorough me. I clenched my knees up planting my feet flat on the bed inviting him in. He had felt it to. His eyes shot open staring down into mine were now completely black but not a scary black…more of a fuck me black.

"Please Edward… Please I need to feel you… Please I need it….." I whined. He looked down at me frustrated and placed two fingers at my opening pushing them in violently. I yelped a little and he stilled his hand allowing me to adjust before he moved them slowly in and out of me. He simultaneously took one of my nipples into his mouth between his lips sucking on it.

"God Bella, you're so fucking tight and wet… you're driving me crazy" he murmured into my fingers wound themsleves into his hair. His movements were slow and steady. It felt incredibly good but i was to overworked. I needed a release so badly it was actually painful

"Faster Edward ….please… I need it faster…" , i pleaded with him. His thrusts quicken with more pressure. I could feel him curling his fingers as he went in hitting my spot. I started shaking and could feel my toes start to burn and the heat slowly crept up my legs…then I felt it coming down from the top of my head through my face…over my shoulders.

"Fuck…. Oh my god Edward… Im gonna cum" i moaned out. He pressed his thumb into my clit and with like vampire speed or something rubbed it as he thrust his fingers in and out of me. He held my waist down onto the bed to keep me from moving and pressed his lips back to mine sucking on my bottom lip.

The heat started to spread faster and I felt every muscle in my body started to tense up.

"Kiss me Edward", I commanded him.

His tongue plunged into my mouth and with on last thrust of his hand my entire being was overcome with orgasms rippling through me. I flopped wildly underneath him. My hands flew everywhere gripping the sheets, his arms, and his hair. I screamed his name over and over between moaning until my throat was dry. I felt like i was possessd the way my back arched and my head pressed back against the bed. Edward's hand never stopped moving bringing me to climax over and over. Finally he slowed and my body flopped back against the bed. My chest was burning and heaving as I fought to bring in air. I felt his fingers cautiously touch my lips spreading them apart and I opened my mouth. I sucked my cum off his fingers only to feel his cold tongue replace them searching for a taste of me. He growled and I assumed he found it lingering on my lips. He began sucking my bottom lip stroking my stomach calming me.

My breathing calmed and my eyes felt heavy. I turned to face him burrowing myself in against his body. Edward pulled the thick quilt I kept at the bottom of my bed over me and stroked my back whispering in my ear

"I should never think what's in your heart or doubt your love and understanding. You're all I want in this world and I would give up the rest of my eternity to have you as my wife for one day." was the last thing i heard before the sleep took over.

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**A/N Whewww (wipes forehead with back of hand). Well... i hope you enjoyed that chapter although im sure some of you wont be happy that Edward it keeping secrets from Bella, but he is a man....**

**Let me know how you liked it.... The more reviews i get for this chapter the faster I'll get the next one up.. there's your incentive if you want more...and as an added bonus...the next chapter is called Biting the Apple....i'll let you make of it what you will.... Ja Ne!**


	17. Biting the Apple

**A/N THanks so much to everyone who reviewd the last chapter... i know you werent expecting Edwards secret but i promise its a crucial....**

**Anyways.... on the next Chapter.... Biting the Appple...whatever could i mean...its probably not what you think... but in anycase... enjoy!!!**

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**Biting the apple**

**EPOV**

I lay next to Bella stroking her hair as she slept peacefully next to me. She was so beautiful while she slept. I closed my eyes in my form of sleeping: Peacefully listening to the sounds of the world around me. The most evident and precious was Bella's heartbeat. Slow and steady. My phone started to buzz and I considered not answering it. I didn't want to stir Bella's peaceful sleep being that she was currently wrapped around me like a spider monkey. I waited until she rolled over to pick up the phone and check the 15 missed calls that I had. The last one being Carlisle. I called back and he answered on the first.

"I'm assuming you told her this morning and she didn't take it well being that neither of you showed for school today?"

"You're assuming correct."

"Where are you now?"

"In bed. She's asleep?" Carlisle chuckled.

"Nothing like a little make-up sex hunh. Oh wait I forgot... you're still a virgin. Ha Ha. Everything all made up then?"

"Very Funny Carlisle. Anyway yes, I think she understands somewhat though im sure this isn't the end of the conversation. I suppose I should have been more honest with her but I didn't expect to ever have to tell her. Why are they coming here anyway?"

"Tanya took on a mate who wasn't so careful about where he had his meals. They need to leave the area...lay low for awhile and ours is the safest place right now." That worried me. I didn't know that Tanya had taken on a non veg boyfriend.

"He isn't coming with them is he?"

"No. I explained to Carmen that Bella was around and he was not welcome in our home."

"Did Alice see anything I should be worried about?"

"Honestly there will be an unavoidable verbal confrontation if you insist on going through with your plan, but nothing to really worry about. However may I suggest that I send you and Bella away for the summer? Spain maybe? You're Spanish is a little rusty. No time like the present to brush up. Or maybe you'd like to meet Bella's mother. You could go to Jacksonville until they leave."

"Carlisle, Jacksonville is in Florida. I'd never make it out of the airport."

"Night flight?" He was laughing on the other end of the phone so I could tell he was just playing with me.

"Okay son. I'll call Charlie later tonight and pitch the deal to him. Tell Bella Esme and I say hello when she wakes."

"Will do Dad."

"Oh and Edward, I know this real love thing is new to you so may I give you a piece of advice."

"Shoot."

"The worst you have to tell her is out on the table all ready. Don't keep anything else from her… and you know what I mean by that."

I knew exactly what I meant though for the moment I forced myself not to think about it. I hadn't decided how I would handle the situation when it came up. I knew at some point she would ask. I would just have to find a way to work around it.

I felt Bella stir next to me. "Mmmmm Edward I feel like I've slept for ten years. How long was out for?"

"Only two hours. Not long at all."

"Im sorry sweetheart. What do you do while I sleep?" "Watch you sleep, read, rummage through your underwear drawer and try stuff on." Her jaw dropped and I couldn't help but laugh at her.

"Im kidding Bella. Really I… "sleep" for lack of a better word most of the time.." "Edward you don't sleep" "I pretend. Makes me feel closer to you." she smiled and came over me straddling my lap. She eyed the glass of water that I went downstairs and got for her. I handed it to her and she drank the whole thing down.

"Who were you on the phone with? I heard you mention Florida." "Carlisle. He suggested we go to Florida instead of you coming to stay with me while the cousins were in town." "Im coming to stay with you?" "Hopefully, if Charlie goes for the plan… you'll be staying at the Cullen Family residence for the month of July." "And how are you going to swing that, are you gonna dazzle my dad like you tried to do to me in the kitchen to get him to agree with you."

I was hoping she didn't notice I did that.

"Maybe? Actually your dad was planning on taking you on vacation but I bought him season tickets to his favorite summer team with all expense paid hotels and crap for two. He can bring a friend or something. Carlisle is going to say that he got them for himself but with family coming he can't go now and the are non refundable and suggest that he take them instead. And you can come in stay with us who will be on out best behavior since outside family is there. And you will be "rooming" with Rose who will keep and eye on us. You'll actually be staying with me so don't worry."

Bella bit her bottom lip for a moment and I felt my cock jump underneath her. "He's totally gonna go for that." "I know. Alice told me already." "Hmm… I guess that helps."

Bella started to trace my lips with her fingers. I rubbed her thighs as she moved her finger between my lips touching my teeth.

"Careful Bella" I said over her finger.

She slowly began rocking back and forth on my lap. "What are you doing?" "Getting you hard again. It's your turn. This time aim low though. That's stuffs a pain to get out of my hair. I didn't get it all last time. You know it glitters in the sun…like your skin. She ran her hand over my chest as she said this.

"Im well aware." She ground her hips harder into me. She gazed down at my mouth pushing my lips up tracing my teeth with her finger.

"What are you thinking about love?" I asked pulling hand from her mouth.

"You have perfect teeth. Do they change… when you hunt?

"A little. The fangs become a little more pronounced and they get a bit sharper."

"Does your venom come out of all of them?"

"No… just the fangs."

"Your tongue is wet like mine. It not warm though. Is that like condensation…or do you actually salivate?"

Where the hell was she going with all these weird questions?

"Um… no Bella… its not condensation. I do salivate. It helps me to taste… like the air and stuff. The venom only comes out when I have the taste… something appetizing…"

"So like when you taste blood… that when it comes out."

"Sort of. When I smell "food" my saliva turns into venom. My body knows it's about to feed."

"Is that why you get venom when you smell me?" Her rocking on my cock was distracting me. I was trying to focus on what she was asking… Trying to peace together where she was going but I couldn't. I could smell her arousal again and her breasts were slowly bouncing on her chest. I sent my mind racing in a hundred different directions. All them leading to Bella's legs being over my shoulders and me being balls deep inside her.

"Yea … I… I can taste your uh… your essence in the air.

"What does it taste like?"

"Like honey maybe... It's um… very very sweet." My hands slid up her thighs to her waits guiding her movements.

She came down low her lips by my ear. Her breast against pressed against my chest but her hips never stopped rocking. I could feel her sticky sweetness seeping through my boxers.

"Do you want to taste it?" I almost didn't hear her she said it so low. For me not to hear her…my mind was sooo else where.

"What… what did you say?" She sat up bringing my hands to over her breast. I gently massaged them and she let out a little moan.

"I said do you want to taste it?"

My eyes drifted down between her legs and I licked my lips at just the thought of it. I looked back up at her face which was now beet red and turned away from me.

"Not that… I meant my…my blood."

I stared at her wide-eyed for a moment but completely and utterly turned on. Her eyes were dark and heavy…very sexy…

"Yes… of course I do."

She moved on her knees placing on hand on my chest rubbing me up and down softly. Her hand cupped my cock gently and then she squeezed it with all he strength.

"Ugh fuck Bella…do that again." She obliged pressing her index finger at my lips cautiously at my lips. I grabbed her wrist before she stuck her finger in my mouth. "Love you don't have to do this." "It's okay Edward… I want to."

Her left index finger pushed into my mouth while her right hand freed me from my boxers. She licked her hand before putting it back on me. It was so warm. I groaned out her name careful not to bite her. I could feel the heat spread throughout her body as she stroked my cock changing her speed and pressure and periodically. I could hear her heart pound as I touched my teeth to her finger. I quickly pulled her hand out.

"If you're scared Bella its okay." She stopped moving her hand and looked up at me…I'm not scared Edward, Im extremely turned on. Your cock is beautiful." I shoved her finger back in mouth and I watched her head slowly move down into my lap. My toes curled as I felt her warm wet tongue circle my tip.

"Ugh Fuck Bella, that feels amazing... you don't even know." She pulled up smiling sexily. "Oh I think I have an idea. A very good idea and I didn't even need to read you mind."

She puckered her lips taking my head into her mouth. Her warm breath and saliva came down over me. She sucked the tip hard before slowly taking more and more of me in. Her hand worked what every part of me wasn't in her mouth and I couldn't stop the moans from coming out of me. I grabbed the back of her head pushing her down more. Her tongue danced over and around me inside her mouth and I breathed unnecessarily and erratically reveling in the feeling. The more I pushed her head down the more of me she took in and soon I felt her tongue completely relax. Her lips tightened around me and I could feel myself hitting in the back of her throat. I sucked the tip of her finger warming the blood that flowed there while massaging her breast. She started to moan sending vibrations from the tip of my resonated throughout my whole body.

I could feel that familiar build of an orgasm come and careful to use only my front teeth I bit into Bella's finger tip. Her warm sweet…ridiculously sweet blood trickled out onto my tongue. It slowly dripped down my throat…and a thirst that I had held at bay for months begged to be quenched. My body tensed up as her taste swirled around in my mouth and I savored every last drop that came from her tiny finger. It was fucking bliss. I could feel my eyes rolling back in my head behind my eyelids. I sucked her finger harder willing more of the sweet ambrosia to come out tightening my grip around her wrist. It came out a little faster assaulting my taste buds and I moaned, not only from the feeling her of ravishing my cock with her mouth but the taste of my Bella's sweet blood. It was far better than I had imagined. I fought off any thoughts of me throwing her on the floor and ripping out her jugular… this was a sweet gift she had giving me… I wasn't going to ruin this perfect moment by being a savage.

I felt my orgasm build to the point where I could hold back no longer. I grabbed Bella's soft tit once more squeezing her tiny nipple between my thumb and index finger and she let out a long guttural moan with me in her mouth and the mixture between the taste of her blood and the wet warmth of her mouth sent me over the edge. My hips bucked up and I forced myself to stay on the bed as she pushed my hips down with all her might.

I pushed her hand away throwing my head back gurgling on her blood that had pooled in the back of my throat and called out her name as I exploded. My body calmed and she crawled up over me sucking on her finger that had just been in my mouth.

I swallowed what was left her before she could stick her tongue in my mouth. She tasted of a mix of the both of is but her blood was way more dominant. Her kiss slowed as she smartly slid slowly to my side rest her head on my shoulder.

"Did it taste as good as you thought it would?" she asked stroking my chest which was heaving..

"Better. Way way fucking better."

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**A/N OoooOOOooo Bella is a very naughty girl....wonder why she did that. In anycase i hope you enjoy this because all types of drama is about to break out....**

**As usual i ask that you review.... I'm gonna start easy and as for atleat 7...(my favorite number) The more reviews i get... the faster i'll get more chapters "gotta want it Dorian...Gotta want it"**

**And thaks again to all my faithfuls... it means alot!!!**


	18. Night and Day

**A/N Okay so this sisnt my best work, I had a really hard time writing this chapter and wrote like 4 different versions of it but im gonna settle with this one for the sake of moving on with the the story. From here on I'm also going to be doing a few parts probably not whole chapters from other p.o.v.'s besides Bella and Edward. Continue to enjoy.**

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**Night and Day**

**BPOV**

Heavy rain pelted the glass walls of Edwards's bedroom. I lay there staring up at the ominous gray clouds that crawled across the sky as Edwards icy fingers danced across the bare skin of my stomach.

"What are you thinking about Love?" He was bedside me cradling his head in one hand.

"Im was just thinking about how nice it is being here with you. It's only been a few days and I already feel so comfortable here." He smiled and kissed me sweetly on the lips.

"I know. Im going to hate it when you leave. It has been nice being able to lay around with you all day not having to listen for Charlie." I sighed and rolled to face him resting my face in the crook of his neck.

"That calm before the storm" he muttered staring out the window.

Yes I could feel it too. The storm that rolled across the sky seemed to anchor itself around the house. All day I had been on edge. The "cousins" were going to be here today. With them was Tanya, Edwards's ex-fiancée. His real purpose for orchestrating a plan to get my Dad out of town and me to stay at his house for the duration of their visit. It seemed backwards to me but the idea of the two of them being under the same roof without me… I would have suggested it if he hadn't. Not that I didn't trust Edward. But still, it would be so much easier for him to be with someone of his own kind.

"You're really in it today Bella. What's on your mind?"

"Nothing.", I answered hiding my face from his. I'm an awful liar; he would see it all over my face.

"Bella, talk to me. Jasper can feel that you're all worked up about something. Would you talk to me please?" Edward pushed away from me holding my chin delicately in his fingertips.

"I'm just a little nervous I guess. I mean, what if she's changed Edward? What if she is more like someone you could be with now? What's to stop you? You have to admit, it would be easier to be with someone of your own kind. You wouldn't have to pretend anymore. You could live your life."

He stared at me for a few seconds. Although I appreciated the moments where his face was calm and serene, where I could drink him in with my eyes memorizing every line and angle of her perfect face… now was not the time for silence.

"Bella love, I have no life without you. There wouldn't be a life for me to live without you in it." He pressed his lips firmly against mine to drive the point home and I happily let the haze take over me. His pressure increased with urgency as he curled his arm around my waist pulling me underneath him. My back arched instinctively as he trailed kisses down to my neck. My breath caught in my throat as his chilly fingers crept underneath my shirt cupping my right breast in his hands. His head moved down and he buried his face in my chest.

"Bella I love you. Can't you see that? Only you." I brought his lips up to meet mine again. His kiss was passionate yet hungry at the same time. Our bodies pressed tightly against each other and I could keep from moaning as he gently squeezed my breast in his hand. My mind was a sea of haze as we continued our make out session only to be interrupted by the sound of someone clearing their throat from the doorway.

"Go away Alice", he grumbled into my lips. His hand was still underneath my shirt and I was so very embarrassed. Caught with his hand in the cookie jar…

"Edward, Carlisle wants you downstairs. They'll be here in a few minutes. Carmen and Eleazer decided last minute not to come." Edward pushed off the bed. A low growl was rumbled in his chest.

"Edward what's the matter?" I asked him suddenly worried.

"That means there won't be anyone to rein her in." Edward head cocked to the sniffing the air at the same time Alice turned to face the stairwell.

"I smell skank", Edward said darkly. His expression changed from irritation and to disgust. I looked up at the gray clouds once more. Before we walked down the stairs. Oh hell… here we go.

I was extremely aware of the sound of my feet on the stairs as we walked. Edward and Alice's steps could barely be heard as my own slippered feet thudded on every step. Below us I could hear various greetings from the family members and gripped Edwards hand nervously. I couldn't tell if it was because I was going to meet three new vampires that I didn't trust with my life or if it was really just because I was nervous about Tanya.

"Mmmmm you were right she does smell good." a musical voice said. The sound carried up the stairs and Edward instinctively wrapped his arms around my waist keeping me behind him. Another voice, this was equally as musical but with a hint of a southern accent, not as strong as Jaspers but there none the less: "Oh stop it Katie. You'll scare the poor girl.

And then the third voice. It was beautiful and soft. Even softer and more delicate the Esme's. It would only be so fitting that this voice, second in beauty only to Edwards velvety voice would belong… to her. My stomach rolled and if Edward hadn't had his hands around my waist I probably wouldn't have moved another step.

"Smells like sewer water to me." The words stung but I tried to ignore them.

My eyes hit the three shades of blond before I could take them completely in. I felt myself go cold because I knew they would look like Rosalie. And I was nothing in compared to Rosalie. Jasper was in my line of vision and I saw the concern in his eyes as a wave of calm washed over me. I forgot momentarily why I was so nervous until I saw her…

She was a few inches taller and cursed with curves. Her porcelain white long slender legs stuck out with striking contrast to the tight black mini skirt. I thought of my own stumpy legs envious that I didn't have legs like that. My eyes traveled over the soft curves of her hips, her stomach flat peaking out of the soft golden top, up to her face. Bright wide topaz colored eyes with pouty red lips. Her hair … soft strawberry blond curls cascading around her face. She was stunning. More beautiful than Rose if that was even possible. I had never felt more out of place in my life. Me, an ugly duckling in a sea of Swans.

I mechanically said hello to her sisters. Irina, the silver blond, an inch or so taller than me but clearly a little older when she was changed. Her face was a little more mature than the youthful faces around me. Katie, the dirty blond looked me square in the eyes and smiled before gently squeezing my hands. There was talking going on around me. Questions of flights and of the two who family members who weren't present going on. But I wasn't paying attention because I was too mixed with emotions.

Tanya didn't speak to him, but I could tell from the irritated look on his face that she was talking to him in her head. She stood speaking with Rose her eyes glued to Edwards face, as far as I could tell she didn't even acknowledge the fact that I was there. She just stared with this sly smile on her face. Like she was planning something.

Finally Esme's voice cut smoothly through the tension that hung heavy in the air. "Why don't I show you ladies where to put your things? Emmett and Jasper please get their bags." Edward and I took a step back as the passed up going up the stairs. Irina, who as far as I could tell was the nice one, nodded at me as she passed.

And then she crossed the floor with exaggerated grace. Her hips swayed as she glided in our direction and stopped in front of Edward on her toes looking into his eyes.. He glared back at her clearly not amused. She was the exact opposite of his darker features. Like day and night…perfect compliments to each other. Just as day and night fit perfectly together I could see so did they.

"Edward." His name rolled off her tongue seductively.

"Tanya" He spat back at her. He pulled me up to his side but her eyes didn't even flicker in my direction. It was like I wasn't even standing there.

"It's a pleasure to see you again Edward. I've missed you."

"The pleasure all yours I assure you."

"Oh come on Edward, don't be that way. Its been thirty years. I think you've made me wait long enough for you. I gave you your space… don't tell me you're still mad at me"

"No Tanya, I'm not mad at you at all. Being mad implies that I care…and I don't"

Alice chuckled next to me. I didn't even notice when she came up to my side.

"Tanya, why don't you just run along upstairs before you piss everyone off? I'd hate to have to be the one to toss you out pn your sorry ass.. again". Tanya turned to glare at her and Alice glared right back.

"Really, I think it's about time you forgave me baby, and gave me back my…."

The anger sharks had been swimming in my head from the second Jasper left the room. It wasn't just that she was eluding to them getting back together, or even that as she spoke she was blatantly flirting with him, looking up at him from beneath her eyelashes… the same way he did to me, but that she was doing all this in front of me like I wasn't even standing there.

"Excuse me! I am standing right here you know? Who the hell do you think you are?" Three pairs of eyes stared at me incredulously. I couldn't just stand there anymore.

"Are you talking me little one?"

"You're the one standing in front of me running her mouth so I must be."

"Edward, control you let pet would you?"

"She's my girlfriend not my pet. And watch you're damn mouth when you talk to her."

"Seriously Edward, this is the best you can do? A frail little human girl…really… Hunh you're really slumming it these days. You must be desperate."

"Correction…. He was slumming when he was with you."

"Ooooohhhhh Burn!" Emmett and Jasper were coming down the stairs laughing. Tanya narrowed her eyes at me but I didn't back down. Maybe I didn't have any sense of self preservation but I wasn't going to stand here being insulted.

"Don't get to attached sweetheart, this here", she motioned between Edward and I, "this wont last very long"

"Thats what you think…"

Three things happened almost simultaneously. Tanya hissed at me crouching into an attack position, both Edward and Alice jumped in front of me taking a defensive position and Esme and Carlisle were standing at the side of us.

"Go ahead Tanya, I dare you to. It's been awhile since I've gotten the chance to knock you around." Alice snarled at her. I was actually frightened. For Alice to jump in front of her like that… I didn't even want to think of what she had seen.

"Okay, that's enough. Everyone just calm down." Carlisle boomed. "There's gonna be none of this do you understand. Do you understand me Tanya? Control yourself."

Edward and Alice stood up but Tanya wouldn't budge. Esme walked over to her slowly grabbing her shoulder. "Tanya honey, why don't you go ahead with Rosalie and take a run, calm yourself down. Rosalie take her outside for a while. Show them the where to hunt."

"But its raining. Hard." "Rosalie dont be difficult just go."

Rose rolled her eyes walked towards the door, "Come on Tanya, let's go... Lord knows we wouldn't want to upset the little prince."

"Bella's, got some balls on her hunh?" Emmett said as he jumped down the stairs following behind Rose and Tanya.

"I'm so sorry Carlisle… Esme… I didn't mean to…"

"It alright Bella. No one expects you to stand there and be insulted by her." Carlisle turned towards her sisters. Katie glared at me and followed Emmett out the door. "Irina… Please keep and eye on your sister. We don't mind you three staying here at all, you're family, but Bella is family as well." Carlisle smiled at me and he and Esme went back upstairs.

"Sorry about that, Bella is it? Tanya seems to be a little disillusioned about her relationship with Edward. I tried to talk to her about before we got here but… well you see how she is." She smiled cordially and followed her sisters out the door.

"If it makes you feel any better Bella," Jasper said plopping down on the couch turning on the TV, "None of us can stand her…except Rose. " Alice went to his side sliding into his lap. Edward pulled me into his.

"Didn't realize you were so feisty Love. I kinda like it." Edward kissed me neck but I cringed away from him. He frowned at me.

"Bella, seriously…doesn't what just happened squash all your worries. Does she really look like someone I would wanna be with be with?"

"Ugh yea… she's gorgeous." He smiled running his nose up the side of my face twirling his fingers in my hair. "She's nothing compared to you love", he whispered in my ear sending chills down my spine. One hand snaked its way underneath my shirt cupping me breast. His thumb ran over my nipple making me moan. Alice and Jasper both turned around making me red in the face. "Besides I prefer brunettes." Edward leaned me back crushing his lips to mine.

"Get a room..."

My mind went cloudy again as it usually does when he dazzles me like this… the bastard. I was about to give in and coil my fingers in his hair but then remember I was upset so I put my hands on his shoulders nudging him so he'd know I was trying to push him away.

He chuckled staring into my eyes as I caught my breathe.

"I hate it when you do that."

"Oh, you hate it when I kiss you?" he turned his head away smiling, faking being shocked.

"No" I said poking him in the chest. "When you distract me."

"Oh well if that's the case then I wont kiss you anymore." He playfully turned his head away but I grabbed his face trying to kiss him anyway.

"I don't mind a distraction sometimes..." I batted my eyelashes at him and turned back smiling that sexy half smile that makes me melt.

"Well then you wont mind if I take you upstairs and distract you some more than."

"No I don't mind at all." Edward picked me up throwing me over his shoulder and slapped my butt.

"You guys are gross you know that."

"Oh, please Jasper, I unfortunately have seen some of the stuff that you and Alice do. You're not in the position to judge."

"Woo Alice, you closet freak!" I called from over his shoulder.

"Closet? There's no secret about it." Edward turned towards the stairs just in time for me to see Alice straddling Jasper who was laying out the couch unbuttoning her shirt.

"Right there on the couch hunh?" I said to Edward as she walked humanly slow up the stairs.

"It helps if you can see when people are coming. It's a little game of theirs."

"Well, remind me not to sit on that couch anymore."

"If that's the case than don't sit anywhere. Not even my bed is safe.

"Ewww really?"

"Jaspers says beds are meant to have sex in and if im not gonna do it somebody has to."

"We could fix that you know?" He plopped me down on the bed grinning at me.

He came over me slowly pulling my shirt over my head. I shuddered as his icy fingers danced up my sides and his lips pressed against the underside of my chin.

"What am I gonna do with you Bella Swan? You never cease to amaze me. You have way to much trust in my ability to control myself."

"Faith and trust. Those are two very important things to have when you dating a vampire you know."

"I could have killed you the other day. I thought about it for a second." He was kissing me everywhere. My face … my neck… my chest. I was fighting to keep my mind clear. He ran his fingers along the top of my jeans pulling the button open.

"If you're trying to scare me you can stop now. It isn't working. I know you wouldn't do that. You love me too much."

"I love you more than anything. You know that right?" He stopped, hovering over me staring in my eyes. I blinked twice to clear the fog from my head.

"I know…I know that Edward."

"And you know that I would never do anything to hurt you or let anyone hurt you. I'd rather die than see you hurt in anyway."

He kissed me softly muting the words on my lips. He pushed off me pulling my pants off and dropping them to the floor. I bit into my bottom lip waiting for him to crawl back over me. But he just stood there. His eyes dark and heavy pulling his lips into his mouth.

Even though he had seen me like this… and wearing even less it was hard to keep from feeling self –conscious. The lacy black underwear set didn't leave much for the imagination. He stood there at the edge of the bed seeming hesitant to move. I realized he was probably getting lost in time again as he so often did when we were alone. Losing track of time, they all did it actually now that they didn't need to pretend so much around me. It was kind of annoying. One minute you're having a conversation and the next they are staring off into space.

"Edward?" I said pulling my legs underneath me sitting up.

"Hmmph. I need to hunt." I reached for my shirt but I was to slow. He pulled it away from me and started walking towards the door. "Edward? Where are you going? Can I at least have my shirt back?"

He turned back to face me, a mischievous smile on his face in the pouncing position. "Edward don't!" But I was too late. He was in the air before I could get his name out. He landed on top of me though I felt barely any of his weight. He pinned my to the bed, my arms at both sides of my head, and kissed me hard on the mouth. I struggled underneath him trying to free my arms so I could pull him closer to me be he held me down.

His tongue traced my collar bone lightly sending shivers though me. He let go of one of my hands bringing it down my side pulling down my underwear.

"Edward."

"Yes Bella?"

"Stop teasing me."

"Not a chance."

He kissed slowly down my chest over my stomach and around over my hip bone. My body tingled all over. His lips were so dangerously close…..He kissed right underneath my navel dragged his lips lower and lower.

"Edward… please… you're driving me crazy" I whimpered trying to push my hips up into his face but he held me down.

"Oh… but it so much fun Bel-la" he always separated my name into two syllables when he was teasing me.

He kissed along the crease of my legs. I couldn't keep from shaking with anticipation. I wanted to feel his cold tongue on me. "You have no idea how good you really smell…its so in…tox..icating."

With that my panties were gonna my legs were spread wide open. A wave of embarrassment washed over me as knelt between my legs staring.

"Stop staring. You're freaking me out."

"I'm sorry. Its just so…." I pulled back from him sitting up closing my legs. "Pretty" In one fluid moment Edward grabbed my ankle pulling me towards him pushing my leg up. I gasp as his head disappeared and his icy circled my clit.

"Oh God!" I screamed out clutching the comforter.

"Mmmmhhhhh… Just like honey." His head disappeared again buried between my legs.

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**A/N As i said not my best work but i needed to get past this part and I didnt think it needed to be such a big showdown.**

**Reviews would be appreciated though i dont really expect any for this chapter.**


	19. Shut up and let me go!

**A/N So Im surprised that you guys liked that last chapter... so thanks so much to everyone who reviewed... that made my day. As a treat i decided to update sooner. This one's a little longer. Enjoy!**

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**Shut up! And Let Me Go**

**EPOV**

"Oh fucking hell…."

Bella gripped the comforter twisting it into knots as I ran my tongue along her folds.

"Fucking hell Edward that feels so fucking good… oh my god."

I wanted to laugh at her. She squirmed against my face trying to pull me closer. I had to hold back though. Images of me throwing her legs around my waist and plunging my raging hard on into her flickered through my head. I grabbed her thighs pulling her more to my face and plunged my tongue deep into her instead trying to silence my thoughts.

"OH MY GOD!!!!" I looked up at my love. Her back was arched off the bed and she had fist fulls of her own hair pulling it as I alternated between sticking my tongue into her and circling her clit. She fell back against the bed and grabbed my shirt at my shoulders trying to pull me to her face. I brought myself over her body pressing myself against her. She squirmed her hips down and I could feel that I was right at her entrance behind my jeans. My cock twitched toward her like it had a mind of its own and knew exactly where it wanted to go. We both groaned at the same time and she wrapped her arms around me.

I wanted her so fucking bad but it was all I could to keep my hands at her side and my weight off her. She had no idea how much focus it took for me to not crush her and yet at the same time I wanted nothing more to crush myself into her. Her eyes were closed as she grinded her hips into my searching for that pressure again and I admit I wanted it to. I pushed myself against her again biting in my bottom lip.

I leaned down kissing her. Bella moaned into my lips tangling her fingers into my hair pressing me more to her face. I kissed her harder and she parted her lips so I could take her bottom lip between mine. I could still smell and taste her on my own lips. The scent and taste were driving me nuts and the sounds of her moans threatened her life as I ran my hand over thighs. I touched her gently between her legs… she was dripping wet… I could slide in there so easily she was so ready for me.

I pulled away from her mouth and she opened her eyes. They were almost black. She brought her lips to mine again and dragged her face to my ear taking the lobe between her lips. This sent shivers down my spine and then I realized that she snuck her sneaky little hand into my pants. She grabbed a hold of my cock, her warm hand squeezed tightly around me.

"Fucking hell Bella… God that feels good."

She started pumping her hand slowly and but hard. Her thumb ran overtop my head and every time she did my body shook. Our lips found each other again kissing hungrily as I hovered over her while she jerked me off. Every fiber in body rebelled against me and I had to keep fighting myself not to do what I really wanted to do.

Bella's other hand undid my button and she started to pull them down. If he came out… if he was free to feel the full intensity of the heat that emanated from her… it would be over for the both of us. I had to keep my focus… But God it was so hard… her tiny hand felt so good and she was expertly stroking me. My pants were down…. around my knees… he was out…. I could feel her… she was pulling her body up to me… she was right there….

"I want you so bad Edward… oh god…" her words came out in a sigh.

She was right there… I could feel her opening… slick… wet… warm…. All I had to do was push… so I did…she groaned through tightly pressed lips… this sounded different…Oh god I hurt her… I fucking knew it…

I pulled away afraid to look at her but I snuck a peak anyway. Her eyes were wild and she grabbed my arms. She was trying to push me away.

"God Bella I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Are you okay?" She was breathing so hard she couldn't speak.

"Ed…ward… please… don't…. stop…. Please….."

"I'm sorry Bella. I didn't mean to hurt you."

I started to pull away from her completely but she grabbed my shirt holding me to her. She fought to catch her breath. Her eyes were practically bulging out of her head.

"No… No….Please Edward. Please. Fuck me oh God would you just fuck me please!"

I crushed my lips to hers again. She fell back against the pillow readying herself for me. I moved between her legs. God I wanted it so bad. I was aching to feel her around my cock but I couldn't… I would hurt her. I had no idea what I would be getting into and couldn't risk it. It was hard enough with what we did already. I couldn't risk her life. I rammed my fingers into her instead. She shook on my hand crying out my name. Her back arched and I kissed her neck but she grabbed my wrist with one hand trying to push it away while her other hand groped for my waist. I pumped my fingers in and out. She moaned loudly her body moving towards me but still trying to push my hand.

It was actually kind of funny to watch.

"No Edward please… fuck me please… "

She was pleading and whimpering. My resolve was fading fast. She looked amazing but I couldn't give her what she wanted so I brought my head between her legs again taking her clit in my mouth. I gently circled it with my tongue and rammed herself into my face. I took this as hint and sucked her clit curling my fingers into her spot. She went wild thrashing her head from side to side rocking into my face.

"Holy shit… Oh My God.. oh hell ..fuck… my god… Im gonna I'm gonna"

I sucked harder and she tightened around my fingers. I pumped my fingers prolonging her orgasm and she shook like she was having a seizure. She finally collapsed against the bed breathing hard and erratic. I slowly moved up to kiss her. She kissed back weakly whimpering beneath me.

"Are you okay love…. I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No… I god… that was…"He eyes were closed and I could tell she was worn out.

"Its okay… Just sleep…"

"But you…"

"I'm good. Sleep Bella. My Bella."

I laid on my back pulling her halfway over me and kissed her hair. Within minutes she was passed out.

I waited until I knew she was in a deep enough sleep to slip from underneath her. My throat burned like hell. I ran to the bathroom rinsing off my face and then headed out the door towards Alice's room. She met me in the hallway.

"You can't possibly still be hungry?" I didn't even have time to respond before she was bent over laughing at her own corny joke.

"Ha Ha Ha. Very funny Alice. Would you just"

"Keep and eye on her for you while you go hunt. Sure no problem.

"Thanks… I won't be long."

"Expect some company while you're out there."

I didn't even need to read her mind to know that Tanya was going to show up and interrupt me.

"Yea I figured as much. If Bella wakes up let her"

"Know that you went to hunt and you'll be back in an hour or so"

"You know that's really annoying… you should let people finish their sentences." She lightly pushed my shoulder. "Now you know how it feels little brother." She smiled, kissed my cheek and danced down the hallway.

I went out the back door running fast. The rain had stopped making it easier to pick up the scent. Em and Rose were somewhere to the right of me. A tree cracked and I fought not to picture what they were doing but it was to late. Em was pressed against the tree thinking how hot it was that Rose was squatting in front of him sucking him off.

Ewww.

I picked up the scent of a herd of deer and took off in that direction trying to shake off the mental picture and get as far away from them as possible. They were ruining my appetite.

I found them and not wanting to waste any time grabbed one up in my arms whisking it away without stopping. I sank my teeth into it and drained it slowly. The blood ran down my throat quenching my thirst and I closed my eyes trying to enjoy my dinner but then there she was. God she was irritating.

_I was hoping to find you out here baby._

"Stalking me now. Can't I even eat in peace?"

"I won't disturb you. Finish. What's 5 more minutes when I've been waiting 30 years for you to forgive me?"

She laid on her stomach on a fallen tree in front of my running her fingers through the grass. I debated not finishing the deer off but knew that I needed to so I turned my back to her and finished. The next thing I knew she was standing in front of me. I forgot how quick she was.

"Edward, are you going to forgive me now? Or are you going to keep punishing me?"

"Im not punishing you Tanya." I threw the deer down at her feet and she jumped back.

"Then send her away and give me back my ring. We can be married by the end of summer. Alice can plan it. I'll be all yours and everyone will be happy."

"Yea, everyone but me and my whole family save for Rose. Are you crazy Tanya? How many times do I have to tell you I don't love you before you just except it as truth?"

"You love me Edward. You asked me to marry you and I messed it up by being unfaithful. But I had needs. I needed it and you wouldn't give it to me so I sought physical gratification elsewhere. But my heart always has and always will belong to you. It's been so long Edward. I found a reason for me to change who I used to be… a reason to start over new."

She took a step towards me but I moved back. "That reason is you. I'm sorry that I hurt, but if I swore to stop would you forgive me and take me back. I won't even pressure you. We can wait until we get married like you wanted."

"Tanya, I need you to listen to me carefully when I tell you this. Unplug you ears and hear me. You and I are oil and water. Stop trying to mix us up. I didn't call off our engagement because you cheated. I didn't want to marry you. I couldn't find what I was looking for… the person I'm supposed to be with… because she wasn't born yet.

"This girl. This is what you really want.?You can't really be with her Edward. I mean do you even feel anything when you touch her. You have to hold back all you strength just to touch her hand. What kind of life is that…constantly having to hold back? If you were with me… you wouldn't have to hold back. I could take all you."

"Yes… all of me… and Tom.. and Dick...and Harry. You know what's funny; I didn't even care about you sleeping around…Its just you. You have no sense of loyalty or respect for anyone. You waltz around like the queen of the world and everyone should bow to you. You're only saving grace is your diet."

"I'm a vampire Edward. Not some lowly human. And so are you and the way you are parading around with this girl… Its ridiculous. You don't really love her. You just love the way she smells and that you cant hear her thoughts. It's not love you feel… its infatuation. And once you slip it'll be over… and you'll be begging me to take you back."

"Don't you ever doubt my love for Bella. I love her more than I can even express with words and if you had any conception of what that word really means you would see it."

"Then if you love her so much why haven't you turned her yet?"

"I love her to much to damn her soul. I didn't ask for this life and I wont take hers, I'll stay with her as long as she'll have me… as long it's safe. If she wants to leave me than so be it. She that I love… I wish to be free.. even if its from me… "

"She'll die."

"I wont be long for this world after."

"Oh, how Romeo and Juliet. This is just ridiculous Edward. Fine! Have your little fun now. I've waited thirty years for you… a few more years of fun will do me some good."

"Don't wait for me Tanya. I'm never coming back to you."

"We'll see."

"I mean it Tanya. I don't love you. I never did."

She lunged at me but I moved out of the way before our bodies could connect. "Don't make me act out of character. I've never hit a woman but I wont hesitate to treat you like a savage if you're gonna act like one. And further more… if you ever even so much as think about laying a hand on Bella again, I'll take personal pleasure in ripping you apart and laugh as Alice burns the pieces. "

"God Edward would you just stop. This is getting so old and boring. Just give me back my damn ring and get rid of the girl."

At this i threw up my hands.

"You know what… I'm done talking to you. You're relentless. My brain is litterly hurting you're so unbelievable. Its like you don't listen. I am not going to be with you Tanya. I'm in love with Bella. Not you. Understand that… and don't bring it up again. How many different ways can I say it? Resolve yourself to being extended family and continue with you life however you were living. I'm never going to do anything to change it."

It's very rare for my to get that annoyed but I couldn't take her anymore.

"Just give me another chance Edward. Let me show you how much happier you'll be with me. Just send her away and everything will be fine I promise." She held out her hand to grab mine. I stared in her face for a few seconds and then walked away.

I made it back to the house and went straight to my bedroom where my Bella was still sleeping peacefully. Alice popped her head up from the couch.

"Did she wake up?"

"Not even once… good job!" We both kinda laughed and then looked at each other. Aside from Bella, Alice was the only other being so in tuned with me, we rarely had to speak sometimes. She could tell I was in no mood to talk so she stood up to leave. Her hand gripped the back of the couch, her pupils dilating as she had a vision. The images were to jumbled for me to make out, but I caught a glimpse of Bella in a black dress surrounded by lights… there were other people around laughing and Tanya was in the background with a blond-haired guy with a ponytail.

"What do you think that means?"

"Hmmm… I don't know.. maybe she found a date for the night."

We both laughed again and as I made my way back over to the bed Alice slipped out of the room.

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**A/N Soooooo this one was a biggie... you got some lemon action, crazy exgirlfriend in denail ( notice how denail kinda looks like denali funny right), and a spolier alert (maybe...). Hope you enojyed it.**

**Btw...I saw the new Harry Potter and im not sure how i felt about it. I think Order of the Pheonix was better but loved the New Moon Trailer...Anyone else see it? What did you think?**

**As alway.. please review...and i'll give you tastey treats in the form of chapters. The more reviews i get the more inclined i am to post faster... so you know.. Feed me Seymour....**


	20. Hey Jealousy

**A/N So here is your update... sorry it took so long but i was really sad that no one wanted to review the last chapter and i worked so hard on it... forgive me I am a wee bit spoiled... I so appreciate everyone reading it though so thanks so much.... in any case enjoy!**

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**Hey Jealousy**

**BPOV**

I felt like I'd been in a coma.A cool breeze sprayed over my bare back and I lifted my head to see that Edwards's glass doorways was open. Looking over at the clock I saw that it was already almost noon. Pulling the sheet around me and walked over to the door way and saw that Edward, Emmett and Jasper were in the backyard wrestling. Edward looked up and smiled at me. The sun was shining and the three magnificent boys sparkled.

"Morning sleepyhead", he called up to me.

"Morning."

"I'll be up in a minute. Emmett tried to take advantage that Edward was paying attention to me and lunged at him. Of course he missed and Emmett landed on the ground.

"No rush babe, I'm gonna go shower."

Emmett looked up and laughed at me. It was then that I realized I really was only wearing a sheet. My cheeks flushed red and I turned to run to the bathroom.

"Ow" My legs were killing me.

"You okay Bella?", Edward yelled from outside.

"I just stubbed my toe." I spoke at my normal volume but I knew he could hear me. I made my way into his bathroom and turned on the shower. The hot water would help my aching muscles. I dropped the towel and froze as I caught a glimpse of myself in the full length mirror. I had a small bruise on my waist and what looked like finger prints on my thighs .I didn't even realize Edward had hurt me. I didn't feel it. I was so into what was going on. I shook my head. It didn't really matter. I have bruises all the time. At least I got these having fun. I stepped into the shower and let the hot water run over me.

We had come so close last night. I felt him almost enter me. Just barely but it was enough to send bolts of electricity through my body. His eyes were so black. I knew that under normal circumstances that should scare me, but it was hot. He was hot. So fucking hot. I started thinking about how he looked and felt without his shirt. His scent, his taste, the feel of his cock. Before I knew it I was touching myself. My fingers pressed against my clit circling and I leaned back against the wall of the shower letting the water wash over me. I moaned softly squeezing one of my breasts. I was so into it I didn't even hear someone enter the bathroom clearing their throat. Good thing the glass was so foggy, I wondered if they could see through it anyway.

"Bella honey… what um… what are you doing?" I snapped at Edwards's silky voice hitting my ears. Shit, he just caught me masturbating.

"I was um washing my hair" I lied. He started to walk towards the shower and two thoughts instantly popped into my head, 1 there was no shampoo in my hair and 2 he would see the bruises and cut me off again. I wasn't having that. He touched the doorknob to open it and I quickly poured shampoo in my hair and popped my head out hiding my body.

"Want some help?" He smiled my favorite crooked smile and my knees almost buckled. "Um no, I'm almost done. I'm actually a little hungry… do you think you could…"

He pecked me on the lips quickly and smiled. "Sure, I'll go get you lunch. What are you in the mood for?"

"Anything really… it doesn't matter."

"Okay… I'll be in the kitchen when you're done."

He left and I finished my shower. I needed to make sure I covered my bruises well and was about to put on a t-shirt and jeans but I knew Alice would complain and make me change. I settled on a short-sleeved summer dress. Kill to birds with one stone.

The smell of grilled chicken filled the stairwell and I walked into the kitchen to see Esme tossing a salad. She licked a tomato slice and scrunched her face up. Carlisle and Edward laughed.

"Well, it looks kinda bloody. I didn't think it would taste that bad. Oh, Hi Bella, I didn't mean to make fun of your food… but Geez I can't imagine that I used to eat something that tastes this awful." She smiled at me and we all laughed. I laughed pulling a slice of tomato from the bowl and put salt on it. "You're supposed to eat it with salt." She eyed me curiously as I ate the tomato slice then tried it herself.

"Ick… that's even worse." As she said this Tanya walked into the kitchen. "Awww how cute… lunch time for the little human is it."

I froze for a minute but then Edward was at my side placing a plate of grilled chicken salad in front of me. He kissed me cheek and handed me a fork. "Here you go love. Delicious and nutritious." Tanya glared at me and I glared right back putting a fork full of salad into my mouth.

"Oh My good Edward this is so good." Right as I said that Emmett and Rose walked into the kitchen followed by Alice, Irina and Kate.

"Hmmmm… where have I heard that before?" I stared at Emmett wide-eye completely understanding what he meant and flushed red. Carlisle and Esme both looked away but I could see the smirks on their faces. Edward growled but Emmett just laughed. Tanya looked like she would explode.

"Oh stop it Emmett. Leave Bella alone.", Alice said coming up behind me squeezing my shoulders. "It's not like we've never heard you before. No Rosie… just the middle finger… just one." Everyone started laughing at Alice's perfect imitation of Emmett including Rosalie. I didn't get the joke until Edward whispered in my ear that Em enjoys backdoor fun.

"Ewww Emmett that's gross"

"Don't knock it till you try it Bells." As did Esme, Emmett grabbed a tomato slice from my plate and popped it in his mouth. No sooner than swallowing was he hacking up his left lung trying to get it back up.

"Eck.. That shits horrible." Rose smacked him on the back of his head. "Then don't eat it dumbass." We all laughed again, well everyone except for Tanya. She kept glaring at me while I ate and laughed with the family with Edward by my side and Alice behind me. He wasn't even touching me. Just sitting there and yet she was shooting me death glares. It didn't occur to me until then as I glanced around that they had naturally shifted into some kind of protective formation. Edwards shoulder was enough in front of me on the right, Alice watching my back and Emmett to my left. Everywhere we went this was always how it was in some fashion. My three guardian angels. I smiled to myself eating as I thought over how much I loved the Cullen family and how badly I wanted to be one of them while they talked amongst themselves.

"What the hell are you smiling about?" Tanya's sharp words caught me by surprise. I looked up and she was standing across the counter from me with her arms folded across her chest. Her loose fitting floral shirt stopped just above belly button and her jeans were cut so low I could see the v of her hip bones. I felt frumpy in my dress.

"I'm sorry what?"

"You heard me. I didn't stutter. What the hell are you smiling about?" Carlisle cleared his throat.

"Really Tayna, today is a nice day. Try not to ruin it with your crotchety attitude. I swear if it weren't for the rest of you family…" he grabbed Esme hand and they left out the basement door. I could here the purr of the black Mercedes as they drove away.

Kate went to her sister's side. I got the impression that she was quite the follower and Rose just stood in the door way looking irritated.

"You gonna let her talk to you like that big-balls Bella?"

"Don't instigate Emmett" Rose snapped at him. "This house used to be peaceful."

Emmett turned towards, and for the first time since I had met this family he looked irritated with her. "Yea, well tell your friend over there to quit startin shit and this house would stay peaceful." He pushed past her and few seconds later the front door slammed. Rose didn't say another word. She stalked out of the kitchen to some unknown room.

"See how much trouble you presence brings to this house. To my family. You don't belong here." Both Alice and Edward growled and Edward opened his mouth to speak but I held up my hand. "I've never had a problem here until you came; I had no intentions on having any kind of bad relationship with you. It's not my fault that you don't like me However, I would appreciate it if you don't have anything pleasant to say… than don't speak to me at all. I won't argue with you here. It's childish and idiotic and I will not disrespect the Cullen's house or family on account of you."

Both Tanya and Kate narrowed there eyes at me. I went back to enjoying my salad as Edward squeezed my thigh.

"Who the hell do you think you are talking to me like that?"

"Edward's girlfriend."

"Ha, keep telling yourself that girly, he's my fiancé. I'm just humoring him for now. But you'll see, once he gets what he really wants from you, you'll be toss aside like the piece of worthless garbage that you are." Her words cut deep and whatever knew found confidence I had was slipping. But I suffer in silence so I mustered the last bit of courage I had and slammed my fork down on the plate and pushed away from the counter.

"You know what; take a look at your own life instead of looking into mine. I didn't steal you boyfriend. As for being thrown aside like worthless garbage, isn't that what he did with you? You know 30 years is a long time to pine over someone who clearly doesn't want you. It's sad really… I almost feel bad for you. I thought vampires were supposed to have dignity but I don't see anything dignified about you. Jealousy is very unbecoming and I can see why he left you. You aren't nearly good enough to so much as be in the same room as him or any of the Cullens for that matter"

I walked out of room before she could open her mouth to speak again not wanting to continue the conversation. I walked out the front door and into Jasper.

"Whoa Bella, you okay. I'm getting some crazy vibes from." I was on the verge of crying but didn't want to break down in front of Jasper. I knew he would try to console me and it would hurt him so I held it together and put on a fake smile. Suffer in silence to spare the ones I love and I loved Jasper too.

"I'm fine Jazz. Really. Tanya just keeps starting with me. It's really annoying. I'm starting to regret coming here. I mean Edward could have just stayed at my house every night and spent the day with me or anywhere. Why did he have to bring me so I'd have to be around her all day."

Jasper came slowly to my side careful not startle me and pulled me down to sit on the stairs. He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled my head down onto his shoulder sending waves of calm over me. His head came down slowly to rest on mine, but he was still stiff as a board. "You okay Jazz? You really don't have to do this if its to much." "No, I'm okay. I just came from hunting. Alice saw me consoling you at some point today so I figured I'd better be prepared." I smiled again thinking about how much I loved this family.

"I know that you're feeling like its not… You're not worth it… but Edward has his reasons for bringing you here. He really loves you Bella. The way that we vampires love each other. Unconditionally and irrevocably. Aside from just wanting to spend time with you, savoring every moment he can have with you, his main point was to have you know his family. We didn't really know it was going to be this way. Alice saw Tanya being initially peeved but we didn't think she would keep it up. She never really care about Edward the way she claimed she did… which is stupid because why would someone lie to Edward… he'd find out the truth eventually no matter how hard you try to keep it from him. And we love having you here. You're family."

"Rose still hates me." "She doesn't hate you. Rose is just Rose. She's more worried about her own ass. Just know that any member of this family would be willing to go to war for you. We love you like one of our own and its not just because we love Edward and want him to be happy but because of you. The way you accept us and never judge us for what we are. The fact that you know that at some point, except for Carlisle we've all killed people and yet you can still sit here and see the good in us. We love you for that."

"I love you guys to. I hope you all know that. I don't know where I would be without the rest of my family." I felt better after talking with Jasper. We sat there for a few more minutes and the Jasper stopped breathing so I knew it was time for me to move. I stood up and he cracked a smile at me. "Sorry Bells, I promise… It'll all be easier one day. Things have a way of working themselves out.

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**A/N I feel bad the Jasper always gets such a bad rep so i decided to help him out a little. **

**In anycase... you already know what im gonna ask for... so im not gonna bother to ask... However i will say please. The more reviews i get the faster the chapters go...Quid-pro-quo... i wanna know that you want it!**


	21. Closer

**So as a special treat... since you guys are so awesome and gave me so much love im gonna post two chapters... these are fillers but i hope you enjoy them anyway...**

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**Closer.**

**EPOV**

After Tanya's last pissy fit Rose and Emmett took the Denali clan to Seattle for the weekend so it was nice to enjoy the peace and quiet in the house. Bella and I spent the majority of the time watching movies with Alice and Jasper until she passed out on the couch. Each night, or morning, however you wanted to look at it, I carried her up to bed and she slept peacefully at my side, more peacefully than she did when she was in her own bed. She was so beautiful when she slept, lips slightly parted, hair splayed out against my pillow, the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she breathed. Most of precious was the sound her beating heart, I would spend most of the night resting my head against her chest listening to her heartbeat. God how I love her.

Sunday morning I waited patiently as she woke up, always ways the same way, stretching first than reaching her hand out for me.

"Good morning love, did you sleep well?" I asked her kissing her hand. She had forbid me from kissing her mouth until she brushed. Silly lamb.

"I always do when you're here." She answered rolling over to face me. She blinked a few times, her eyes adjusting to the light and smiled at me. I ran my fingers through her hair tangling a not and kissed her hand again.

"Can you go brush so I can kiss you already… I can't bare waiting any longer" She giggled and bounced away to the bathroom and returned "minty fresh" as she put it. She climbed into my lap and kissed me gently on the lips hugging me close to her.

"Im sorry you always have to sit around waiting for me to wake up. It must be boring for you."

"Its okay… I find ways to entertain myself." I reached next to the bed pulling out a sketch pad. I had drawn and colored in a picture of a Lion watching over a sleeping lamb that was curled at its side. She stared at it for a moment running her fingers gently over the image, a tiny smile crept onto her face.

"Its beautiful Edward… You drew this last night?" "I've been working on it a few days actually… I wanted to get it right before I showed it to you." "Its so beautiful… Can we frame it… hang it up?" "Sure… we'll get a frame out in Port Angles today on the way to the movies. Angela called and asked if we wanted to double with her and Ben, I figured I've kept you trapped in the house long enough now." He face widened. Next to Alice, Angela was her best friend.

She laced her fingers through mine and kissed me again. "Show me what else you've drawn." We laid there in bed for the next hour looking at the many pictures I had drawn since meeting her. Many of them were of her sleeping. A few were the days we spent here at my house when it was sunny, out by the brook. My favorite one was from a picture I had seen in Alice's mind a while back. It was a candid shot actually, Bella was standing in the door way of her kitchen, and her back turned looking sideways smiling at her held out left hand. A ring shining on her finger.

"What's this?"

"Just a thought… something I picked from someone's head." She narrowed her eyes at me for a moment and opened her mouth to speak but I kissed her before she could. Her body molded to mine and she gripped my arms pulling me close to her with all her strength. I pulled away allowing her to catch her breathe.

"You're doing it again." "What?" I answered chuckling. "Distracting me…it's not fair. I can't do that to you."

"On the contrary you do it all the time… I just don't let you see it… you have enough weapons in your arsenal" I poked her side and she giggled.

"Oh yea, like what?" she asked incredulously. I moved over her closing her eyes and kissed her eyes lids. "Your eyes for one thing, your lips" and then I kissed those. "Your hands." I kissed her fingertips. "Your heart." I grabbed her breasts, kneading them and kissed above her heart. She moaned and arched her back into me.

"That might be your greatest weapon of all. That sound you make when I touch you." I ran my hand down her side, touching the smooth skin of her stomach, she moaned softly again before bringing her hands to my face again pulling me down again. We kissed until I felt her chest stop moving and I pulled away so she could breathe.

"Why don't you go get dressed before we end up staying in bed today?" "I wouldn't mind that one bit you know." "You might not and neither would I but I think Angela would be pretty pissed if we stood her up."

"Are you gonna invite Alice and Jasper to go?" I listened for a moment sickened from the sounds coming from their bedroom. "They're um… You know… Sundays they get much." I raised my eyebrows at her and she blushed understanding what I meant.

45 minutes later Bella came down the stairs. She had on tight blue jeans that hugged her figure deliciously and deep blue shirt that was cut low so her cleavage showed. I felt my cock twitch as I thought her running my tongue between her breasts. She blushed at my staring.

"Do I look okay… Im taking advantage of Alice's uh preoccupation so let's get out of here before she hunts me down." I laughed and open the door to the garage. She sauntered past me and I had to "adjust" myself as I watched her ass while she walked.

"Oh Bella….I love your ass in those jeans." I said grabbing her butt.

She sucked her teeth, smiling at pushed me as we walked down the stairs. Bella cracked the windows on the way, inhaling the dew saturated air. "I love the smell of rain now. It's peaceful." She absentmindedly stroked my hand in her lap laying the back of her head against the window facing me. "Edward… can I ask you something?"

"Anything Bella."

"What do you think is gonna happen to us?"

"I don't know Bella; you're asking the wrong person… Im not the fortune teller remember."

"Well what I mean is…. What do you want to happen with us?" I looked at her for a moment. Her eyes were turned down towards my hand in her lap and I could tell she was nervous. I could feel it.

"Well, I would like to stay with you… make you happy… for as long as I can. I try not to think about the future… ive got too much time on my hands so Im just taking it one day at a time… like we agreed… one day at a time."

"Hmmm… because I've been thinking… we're so good together you know… everyday I get a little closer to you… sometimes I think god made us into corresponding shapes… like puzzle pieces you know.

She smiled up at me with a hopeful look on her face. "I know what you mean. I feel that way to. I'm glad you're letting me love you. It's more than I deserve really." We pulled into the parking lot of the frame store but she didn't move to get out of the car so we sat there.

"You were alone before you met me before right?" "Yea… where are you going with this?" "It sucks being alone. I never really connected with anyone… you know…the way I do with you. I never thought I could love anyone… but now I know I can't love anyone but you." She pulled me towards her kissing me fiercely. For a moment I forgot what she was talking about. I crushed her to me, our lips searching each other passionately. She moaned into my mouth making me kiss her harder as she tried to crawl over into the front seat. I almost let her until I realized we were in the middle if a crowded parking lot and there were two old ladies staring at us saying how badly behaved we were. I pulled away painstakingly and Bella fell back into her seat catching her breath.

"See… I told you dazzled me too." I laughed and got out of the walking around do open her door. She climbed out and grabbed my hand smiling at me. It was like I was staring at the sun. I couldn't help myself. I grabbed my face in her my hands and kissed her again. The thoughts of the people around us broke my concentration and I led her inside… both of us a little embarrassed.

We picked out a nice frame for her picture and then sat talking while she ate lunch in a café. From there we stopped at a bookstore. We could spend hours in a bookstore together. I watched her from the corner of my eye. She seemed to be deep in thought about something… probably what she was hinting about in the car but my gut feeling told me not to ask. We purchased a couple and then headed over to the theater to meet with Angela and Ben. We exchanged greetings… you know all the niceties of being friends and sat down watch one of the most God awfully boring movies I had ever seen in my life. The theater was playing indie films and I felt like kicking myself for subjecting myself to Life Aquatic.

Damn myself for not being able to sleep. Bella shifted uncomfortably in her seat next to me and I could tell she hated too. Ben however was ecstatic. He laughed hysterically at God knows what because the movie wasn't funny at all. He's such a dork. Finally the movie was over and I laughed to myself thinking about what a Jaguar shark might taste like….

As we walked out Angela and Bella were in front of us. Ben walked next to me ranting about the movie. "Wasn't that one part where Murray goes postal and starts shooting at the pirates great?" "Uh yea… that was great." "And the end… oh man… with the big shoot out… oh man that was sooo awesome." "Yea Ben… so cool." I watched Bella and Angela walk in to the bathroom and relaxed a little as Ben rambled on about that stupid movie. Finally Bella came up and wrapped her arms around my waist. I kissed her the top of head holding her to me.

"There's gonna be a fair next week. Angela wants to know if we wanna go. We can get Alice and Jasper and Rose and Emmett to go. Maybe even Carlisle and Esme… do you think they would wanna go?" "I'm sure once they see how excited you are they would love to go… but why so excited? She smiled wickedly at me. "It's a charity fair…with a dunk tank. Angela and Lauren are running it." We both laughed. "All right you little she-devil. We'll go." We made plans with Angela to meet up with them Thursday night and parted ways. We spent most of the car ride back to forks bashing the movie and laughing at how excited Ben was to see it. It was such a nice night out… the sky clear and air cool so I pulled over on a look out spot and rolled the windows down. I opened the moon roof and we laid our seats back staring up at the sky. Teitur played quietly on the radio as we sat in silence with our fingers laced together. At the same time we turned to face each other and then laughed.

"I could lay like this forever with you Edward." I could have just been imagining it but it seemed like she put more emphasis on the word forever.

I stroked her face at the same time she did mine and as if our minds were one, we leaned into each other and kissed. Her fingers tangled themselves into my hair and I pulled her closer to me. She came over me pushing me over my back. Her hair fell like a curtain around us. I pulled her into my lap pressing her to me. One of her hand wove into my shirt stroking my chest. I loved the feeling of her warm hands on me.

"Maybe we could climb in the backseat?" she panted into my face. I slipped out of car and she climbed into the back seat. I pulled a blanket from the trunk just in case she started to shiver. Having never been in the backseat of my car I forgot how cramped it was. But it didn't matter. Bella had already shimmied out of her jeans and was sitting up on her knees waiting for me.

"Hot?" "Yea now." She pounced on me crushing her lips to mine clawing the buttons of my shirt. I pulled her into my lap my hands gripping onto her firm ass. She moaned against my lips grinding into my already hard cock. Her lips trailed down my neck and I laid my head back against the seat reveling in the feeling her warm lips on my skin and her intoxicating scent. I pulled her shirt over her head one she had mine open and unfastened her bra. I could tell she was dizzy from kissing me but she looked so beautiful in to moonlight I couldn't keep my lips off her. I put my hand underneath her head and laid her down in the back seat pushing the door open.

I moved between her legs and she hitched them around my waist holding me to her as I kissed her everywhere my lips could reach in the cramped space. She moaned at each of my kisses and caress and the sounds were driving me nuts. My cock strained in my jeans painfully and I reached down to adjust it but for the first time… like ever... she beat me to it. Her tiny hand wrapped around me and shuddered She pressed herself up against me., pressing my cock, to her grinding and moaning and whispering my name.

She felt so good and I wasn't even touching her skin. I could feel the wetness seeping from her as she moved against me. It was too much. I dug my fingers into the seat above head as she started moving faster her hands gripping the edges of my pants pulling her to me. She quickened her pace marginally and I slowly started to move with her. The added pressure sent shivers through me and my arms started to shake above her head. I fought my mind to keep control but it was slipping away. I growl escaped me and Bella moaned loudly as I fell against her.

She mistook my lack of control as encouragement and molded herself to me. I groaned digging my fingers more into the seat. I could feel the seat molding crushing beneath my hand. I pushed off her sitting in the open doorway. My chest was heaving because I was honestly scared shitless for a moment.

The scent of Bella's arousal whacked me in the face. Bella had taken her panties off and was crawling into my lap. What felt like minutes to me was actually seconds and she didn't realize I was pulling way.

"Bella wait. Wait a minute." She positioned herself over my cock and grabbed my face in her hands and kissed me hard on the mouth. I grabbed her arms trying to push her away but my senses were all out of whack. I thought I was pushing her away but I was in actuality pulling her closer. I put my hands on her hips and with the last ounce of control I had and pushed her away.

She panted catching her breath and pulled her shirt over her lap. "Edward what's wrong?" My body was still shaking as I turned to face her. "We should get back home… it's getting late Bella." She turned her face away from me clearly embarrassed and put her clothes back on. "Okay…. If that's what you want to do. But..."

I slammed the door before she could say anything else and climbed in the front seat. Bella climbed into the front seat and leaned away from me. I could see the hurt in her eyes and it pained me to make her feel that way. I hurt when she hurt. I took her hand and kissed it but she pulled it way. She was pissed. She sat there silently staring out the window her hands folded in her lap.

"Do you wanna get something to eat for dinner?"

"No."

"You're mad. Talk to me."

"Im tired Edward. I don't feel like talking."

"Bella, tell me what you're thinking please."

"Im thinking im tired… and I want to go to bed. Alone. Can I stay at my own house tonight?" Wow she was that mad that she didn't even want to come home with me.

"No. But if you would prefer to sleep alone then I wont come upstairs tonight. Im a little thirsty. I'll go hunt…if you like."

"Whatever."

"Bella… don't be angry with me please."

"Whatever."

"I love you."

"Sure." She closed her eyes and leaned the seat back turning away from me. She didn't speak again until we got home. She stomped up the stairs into the kitchen. Esme was standing at the sink arranging flowers. "Oh hi kids… did you have fun at the….Bella honey what's the matter." Tears were welling in her eyes. Esme came over a pulled Bella into a tight hug before she got a chance to answer. "Oh honey its okay don't cry, what happened? Edward what happened?" "Nothing…. Bella's just very tired. I think I should get her to bed." She cringed in Esme arms when I said the word bed. Esme kissed her forehead. "Okay." She narrowed her eyes at me.

_I can smell you all over her Edward. Please don't tell me you haven't discussed it with her yet? Especially with the way you "carry on". _

I shook my head no and she glared at me. "Bella, honey come on. Let's get you upstairs and ill run a nice bath for you. You'll sleep better." She sniffed and pulled away from Esme. "Thanks but no thanks. I think Im just gonna go to sleep. Goodnight." She turned away towards the stairs but stopped when she realized I was behind her. Her back went rigid and her voice was icy.

"Goodnight Edward."

She stalked up the stairs and leaving me on the stairs staring after her.

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**A/N So... Bella's p o'd...Btw I really didnt like Life Aquatic... Give me love... and I'll love you back... You know how i do...**


	22. Earth to Bella, Part 1

**A/N The title of the chatper is actually the title of an Incubus song i came across while writing this... and i thought it kind of fit sort of.. but more so because it was ironic. Enjoy....**

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**Earth to Bella, Part 1**

**BPOV**

Stupid Vampire Boyfriend. I never felt so humiliated in my life. I couldn't understand why he kept rejecting me that way. He acted like he loved me so much… like he was so sexually attracted to me. I let him taste my blood for fuck sake, if that wasn't the ultimate sign of my trust than I don't know what was. I cried myself to sleep feeling defeated and ugly. Esme had come in at some point during the night to console me. She stroked my hair sang to me. She had the voice of an angel and it calmed me enough that before I knew it, it was morning. I stretched and reached for Edward but felt nothing.

That's right. I had asked him not to come upstairs so he had gone hunting. I didn't even know if he was back yet. Instead I got up showered and changed and went downstairs for breakfast. After skipping dinner last night I was really hungry. Esme was sitting at the kitchen table when I came down with food already sat out for me.

"Morning Sweetheart. I heard you get up so I figured I'd get breakfast for you. Are you feeling better?"

"Thanks Esme." I said sitting down. "And yea I feel a little better. I'm sorry for making a scene last night. I was just really upset about something. Edward and I kinda had a fight."

"Its okay honey, don't apologize. You're Dad called by the way. He's having a great time. Im happy that both of you are getting something out of Edwards little plan." She chuckled went back to reading her newspaper as I ate. It reminded me of sitting across the table from my own mother.

"Did Edward say when he would be back?"

"No, but I don't think he went far. Emmett and Jasper just left a few minutes ago to meet up with him. I think they are going to get parts for Emmett's truck or something."

I felt kind of disappointed that he wasn't back yet. I figured he wouldn't stay away all night but maybe he was mad at me for telling him not to come upstairs. My heart started to ache.

"He asked me to tell you good morning though and to tell you that he loves you."

The pained eased a little even if she was just humoring me. I couldn't tell. I got up to wash the dishes and asked Esme about going to the fair. She thought it would be a great idea for all of us to go… and by all of us that meant the Denali clan too. While were talking about Rose and Tanya came from upstairs. I decided to try and be friendly since Edward wasn't around and Alice didn't seem to be anywhere in sight either.

"Good Morning Rose…Tanya… did you guys have fun in Seattle?" Tanya narrowed her eyes at me and Rose just stared as if she were surprised I was actually talking to her. Tanya was the first to speak.

"Yea we had an awesome time over the weekend." She looked me over lingering on my puffy red eyes. "Doesn't look like you did though."

God she was such a bitch. Esme's eyes shot up at her angrily. "Tanya do not start that this morning! I don't want to hear it." As gentle as Esme was she sounded like a natural Mom when she got angry. I finished washing the dishes and excused myself from her presence. I went back up to Edwards's room and pulled out the new copy of Wuthering Heights that we bought the day before. My other copy was falling apart. Hours seemed to pass and somewhere around Heathcliffe returning I dosed off.

I dreamt about Edward and I in bed and felt a sense of longing in my heart. It wasn't just that I physically wanted him more than I wanting anything else in my life… but emotionally… I knew that I wanted him to be my first. My only one. I dreamt about being with him forever. His meaning of forever. A life without him didn't make sense to me now and every time I thought about it… it felt like my heart was crumbling. Anytime I tried to bring it up he would get defensive to a point where I would lose the confidence to actually talk about it. Alice's words haunted me._ This isn't something he'll want to hear from you. He'll leave you. Trust Me._

I wouldn't bet against her in a million years but the fact that she had seen it at some point meant that at some point he thought about it. I thought that after enough time he would change his mind again. I mean he seemed happy with me. But it was even more than that. I couldn't think of any way to feel closer to him than I already did. On several occasions we had proclaimed undying love for each other…this just seemed like the natural progression of things. Upon waking I had a sort of epiphany. Maybe he wanted his first time to be special. Not rushed and fallen into. Not in the back of his car… but someplace where he felt comfortable…some place he felt at home. And maybe that was the problem. I knew that sometimes he still struggled with his thirst for me so springing it on him might be the wrong way. I knew then what I needed to do. I grabbed my purse and what cash I had and called Angela. Alice wasn't around and there was no way I was going to ask Rose for help. We agreed that I would meet at her house but I didn't tell her what I needed her help with…I didn't want anyone to here what I was planning.

I ran downstairs searching for Esme but she wasn't anywhere around. Rose and Tanya were sitting on the couch watching The Sweetest Thing.

"Rose have you seen Esme around?"

"She left to go see Carlisle?" My plan was already falling apart. "I wanted to go to Angela's for a while. I was gonna ask her to give me a ride since I don't have my car." She looked at me like I was stupid for a moment but then softened her face. Before they left for Seattle Rose had apologized for being so curt with me and kind of for Tanya's behavior. She was still struggling with the fact that I was a semi-permanent fixture her house.

"Why don't you just take the Volvo? The keys are by the door." "Oh… I didn't know Edward didn't bring his car with him. You don't think he'll mind?" Again she looked at me like I had four heads but then she laughed. "No Bella, he won't mind if you take his car. I'm sure its okay." She turned back to the movie as I turned for the keys but Tanya was stepped in front of me in what seemed like two seconds.

"He may not mind but I do!"

"What's it to you if I take _my_ boyfriends car?" She hissed at me and Rose growled at her. "Tanya…leave the poor girl alone would you? I don't feel like getting bitched out again."

Tanya growled and tossed the keys on the floor. I admit I was to afraid to pick them up until she floated back to her seat.

I climbed into the driver's seat of the Volvo. I could smell him in the car. I missed him terribly. We had never been apart under these conditions. Almost as if he had some 7th sense my cell rang and it was him.

"You're awake." He said as soon as I answered.

"Yea. I didn't really sleep late. You weren't here when I woke up this morning."

"No... sorry. I went a little farther than I had planned. Caught the scent of a pack of mountain lions and couldn't help myself." We both kind of giggled than at the same time said I'm sorry which made us laugh again.

"No Edward I'm sorry. I think I overreacted last night. I think I understand now."

"Oh..Really. Esme didn't say anything to you did she"

"No… I figured it out on my own. But I don't really wanna talk about this over the phone. I'll see you when you come home?"

"Yea I'll be back soon. We're just picking up some new tires for Emmett's truck."

"Oh… I won't be here when you get back. I'm going to meet up with Angela. I borrowed your Volvo… I hope you don't mind. Esme wasn't around to give me a ride." He laughed and I could hear him smiling. "Of course I don't mind Love. What's mine is yours. What are you ladies gonna do?" I felt my nerves flair up for a moment as I thought of something to tell him. I felt like what ever I said he would see through . "Oh you know. Just girl stuff."

"Hmmm… okay... Well have fun. Tell her I said hello and if you need money one of my cards is in the center console. Help yourself."

"Um thanks Hun." I said as I pulled into Angela's driveway. "I'm here so I'm gonna go. I love you."

"I love you too Bella. I hope you know that" He hung up just as Angela was sliding in the car.

"Hey Bella, I hope you didn't wanna come in… its an animal house in there." She said strapping herself in. I turned and laughed and shaking my head no.

"Driving Edwards's car, now that's real love there. Ben hardly ever lets me drink is crappy old civic. So anyway… what's up? What did you need my help with that you couldn't tell me over the phone?" I gulped and looked at her. "Can I ask you a question without meaning to pry?

"Yea. Sure Bella."

"You and Ben have…done it… right?"

She laughed nervously and her cheeks darkened a little bit. "Um… yea… we have. Why do you ask?"

"Edward and I haven't…" She stared at me wide eyed for a minute. "Wow… really… Im kind of shocked actually."

"Why?"

"Well I mean the way you guys are together. You're like really in tuned to each other. It's really something to watch you guys. Like I can see that he's so gentle with you and it always looks like he's protecting you. Like he's ready to jump in front of a moving truck or like take a bullet for you or something. You guys seem like you're really in love. I just assumed you had"

I smiled to myself knowing that people could see what I felt. I began to understand Edwards reasoning for having me at home with him while Tanya was there even more.

"Have you ever done it?".

"No… neither has he." Her mouth dropped open and she blinked at me a few times. "That… I find even harder to believe. I mean… I can't think of one girl who hasn't fantasized about him at some point since he's been here."

I smiled for a minute and then pulled over into the tiny strip mall which made up Fork's only shopping center. It consisted of hair/nail/ waxing salon, a flower/gift shop, a small supermarket, a Chinese restaurant, and a pizza shop/ deli. Across the street was the Newton's sporting good store, a CVS, and a Dollar Tree.

"Well… my plan is to fix that… tonight. We've come close a few times and he always stops before it gets too far. I think we've just been coming at the wrong way…so I wanna surprise him… make it special you know." "Oh… okay I see. Okay so first things first, we have to get you dolled up.

Where are you gonna do it?"

"At his house. He's so comfortable there. I figured that would be best." "With all his family there? Wont that be weird?" Wow… if she only knew.

"No… his sisters and brothers do it all the time. I mean his parents don't mind me sleeping in his room. They actually lied to Charlie for me." I could see the shock settle in on her face as we walked into the salon. She insisted that I get a Brazilian wax and it was the most god awfully painful thing I had ever gone through. I had them wash and curl my hair into soft layers that fell gracefully around my face and let the stylist put a little make up on me.

We talked about what it was like staying at the Cullen house and the up coming senior year and how excited we were to graduate. She helped me picked out flowers and vanilla scented candles and then as formality we went over to CVS and she suggested her favorite brand of Condom while I picked up warming massage oil. We had lunch and then I dropped her off at home and drove nervously back to Edwards.

When I got there Edward still wasn't back and I was grateful because it gave me a chance to sneak up to his room and set things up. When I got back upstairs Rose was standing in the kitchen doorway looking out the window. She gasped when she looked at me gussied up appearance. Tanya stalked into the kitchen like I dog that smelled food.

"What are you all dolled up for?"

"Nothing… I hung out with a friend today. She got a haircut so I figured why not do something myself, why?"

"Well… its just that you look kind of ridiculous is all… she laughed and smiled at Rose who didn't look in the least bit amused. I didn't have time to humor her so I just turned to go upstairs and as I did a hole tore in the CVS bag. I froze with horror as the massage oil fell from the bag and rolled underneath the table. I reached for it but of course she was faster than me. She stared at the bottle and anger swept across her face.

"What the Fuck is this for?"

My cheeks flushed red I was so embarrassed but I tried to snatch the bottle from her anyway. "None of you business… just give it to me."

She glared at me then pushed me away knocking me to floor. It knocked the wind out of me but I didn't want to be defenseless as she loomed over me so I scrambled to my knees. Rose came to my side and pulled me up snatching to the bottle from her. She gave it back to me without looking at it and for the first time I was grateful Rose was there. She stood in between us almost eye level with Tanya.

"What the hell… I told you not to touch her. If she has one scratch on her that my ass you … you're okay right?" She turned her head glaring at me over her shoulder.

"Yea… I'm fine Rose thank you."

"Could you just go upstairs and wait for someone else to come home please. I don't feel like babysitting you right now." I grabbed my bags and dashed up the stairs.

Tanya was such a rotten horrible person… I didn't see how even someone like Rose could tolerate her. I set to work, placing the candles around the room and changing Edwards white sheets to black ones so the oil didn't stain them. After that I placed the roses around the bed and pulled a few apart scattering the petals. I popped in the love mix that Angela had lent me and then called Edward telling him to call me before he came upstairs. I didn't want him to walk in before I was ready. There was no way for Alice to ruin my surprise. Edward hadn't spoken to her all day and she was in Port Angels with Irina and Kate shopping. Everything was going great and as planned.

After a quick bath I slipped on the little black outfit Alice had made be buy so long ago when she first told me about Tanya. I remember her saying this wasn't the type of thing you wore for long and I hope she was right. I tried to keep my mind focused and not let the nerves take over me but I was shaking by the time I crawled on to the bed to wait for him. It was dark now and the moon shone through the windows. It was a clear and perfect night. I waited patiently thinking of what I was going to say… imagining what his reaction would be. I hope he would be happy. I hope he would feel the same way I did about everything that I had planned to say to him. I was so lost in my thoughts that I almost didn't hear my phone ring.

"Bella honey… can I come up now? I miss you." I looked over the room once more before turning out the lights and turning on the music. "Um… yea… sure come on up.. but first… who's um..Who's home.. I've been up here since I got back." He was quiet on the other end and then answered that it was just Emmett and Jasper home. Rose and Tanya went to meet up with Alice for a movie and Carlisle and Esme were at a lounge with some of Carlisle's co-workers. Things were working out better than I had imagined.

"Okay then come on up… I miss you to." He was opening the door before I got a chance to hang up.

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**A/N So... the next chapters is going to be a sort ot cataylst... and its already written...so if you wanna know what happens... you know what you have to do..even if you wanna just say Hi... and guys i still need some songs.. so send me your favorite songs and ill try to stick some lyrics in for you... **


	23. Try, Try, Try

**A/N I was gonn wait another day or two to post this but you guys have been so good to me that I decided to go ahead and post it because im eager to get the next one up...So enjoy....**

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**Try Try Try**

**EPoV.**

I could here in Bella's voice that she was nervous about something so when I opened the door I tried to prepare myself. However I wasn't expecting this. The room reeked of Vanilla and Rose, soft music was playing and the lights were out but candles were lit all around the room casting shadows on the wall. I gasped when I saw her reflection in the window and started to melt when I finally allowed my eyes to fall on her. I closed the door behind me leaning on it taking her in.

She was a vision of beauty sitting in the middle of my bed with her legs curled underneath her. Her hair fell in waves around her face and her perfect lips were tinged pink. My eyes traveled down to her barely covered breasts over the lace of her little outfit to her thighs that peaked out from underneath it.

"Say something Edward. You're making me nervous."

She held out her hand for me and against my better judgment I went to her. She pulled me toward her and I was kissing her before I realized. She smiled into my lips before her hands to my face pulling me to her more. I knew what she was thinking. The wheels clicked as soon as I saw her but I could resist her, my longing for her pained me. I couldn't stay away. I tangled my fingers into her hair laying her down and she brought her legs up around me. I stroked the curve of her hip and she purred arching her back into my chest.

"I missed you Edward. I don't ever want to go to bed mad at you ever again."

I looked deep into her dark eyes and loved washed through me. She was a song written by the hand of God and I was so unbelievably undeserving of her. As if she could sense what I was feeling she brought my hand over her heart and smiled up at me.

"Bella… what is all this…you didn't have to… you shouldn't have…" She put her finger to my lips silencing me.

"Edward… I love you. I love you more than anyone had ever loved anyone. This… what we have… is right. Im certain."

She pressed her lips to mine and I could sense the urgency behind them, the love that she was trying to show me physically. I was lost in her kiss for a moment, my mind hazed over as she moved over me, her fingers gliding tentatively over my stomach up to my chest pushing my shirt up. The scent of her arousal washed over me as I rolled over allowing her to straddle my waist. My hands reached around squeezing her bare ass pushing her into my hard-on. She moaned digging her fingers into my shoulders before kissing me again. She leaned up moving her hands to my belt and I knew I needed to stop her before this went too far. I needed to tell her what I should have told her from day one.

She leaned down kissing my neck then my shoulders and then my chest, her soft warm lips felt so good but I seized hands anyway. I pulled her up to sit beside me and watched with a breaking heart as tears welled in her eyes and her bottom lip started to tremble.

"Am I moving to fast?… I can slow down" She moved onto her knees placing her hands between them and lowered her head. Her hair fell around her face and I hated myself even more as one tiny whimper escaped her lips.

"Please… Just tell me what to do." Her body started to shake and I wrapped my arms around her. "Bella… I… we cant…I can't. She pushed away from whipping her head away. Tears fell from her cheeks.

"What's wrong with me? Why don't you want me?" I moved to take her hands but she jerked them away from me. "Are you not attracted to me?" I reached out to touch again this time grabbing her and pulling her back to me before she could pull away.

"No Bella honey… No that's not it at all. You're the most beautiful woman ive ever laid my eyes on. Please don't think that." I kissed her face tasting her salty tears. She wrapped her arms around my neck pressing her lips to mine throwing all her body weight on me. I fell back a little but then grabbed her arms and pushed her away placing her in front of me.

"Bella would you just stop for a minute. Please let me explain."

"Explain what… that you don't really love me the way you say you do. Alice told me that love and lust are one in the same for you. Its just like with Tanya isn't it. You're just lonely… passing you're time until you find something else to do." Her words were like acid and hurtful. I stared at her incredulously.

"Bella how can you doubt my love for you for one minute? You're the most important thing in the world to me. I have never loved anyone or anything more than you ever. You're everything to me." I pulled her face up so she could see the sincerity in my eyes. "Bella, you have to believe me… you have to know that how much I love you… I survive on the breath you are finished with… If I did something to hurt you…I couldn't live with myself."

"You're hurting me now. I don't understand… how are you expecting me to feel when you keep rejecting me?"

"Bella… I'm not rejecting you…Im trying to keep you safe. Its to dangerous. I… I could kill you. You have no idea how badly I want you. How I always want you but one slip up… one moment of lost control… you could die by hands… I can't live without you. I can't risk it.

She looked into my eyes with understanding. "You won't have sex with me because you're afraid of hurting me? We've done other things… you've never done anything that I can't take." She lowered her heard again and her hands roamed up over my thighs her fingers linked into my belt buckles and she pulled herself up to my eyes level.

"I don't think you'll hurt me. We'll go slowly. Very very slowly. If you feel like you're losing control we can stop until you calm down. Whatever it takes… just please. Please can we do this?" Her eyes pleaded with me and I couldn't bare denying her. I let her press her lips against me. She grabbed onto my shoulders and kissed me harder. Her breast pushed against my bare chest and she shivered in my arms as I wrapped my arms around her.

She moved up bringing herself onto my lap. Her warm body molded to mine and again I felt my sense of control weaken. I grabbed her hips and pushed her off me.

"Bella im sorry… I can't risk it…you can have anything else you want… I'll give you anything else you ask for… but please don't ask me to do this. If I hurt you… it would kill me."

She balled her fists up and pounded them on the bed. "Damnitt Edward you won't hurt me. I trust you. Edward you tasted my blood… and you didn't go crazy… you didn't hurt me then.. Don't you think that should be our biggest concern… but you got past it. Please Edward… Just try… please just give in to me. Give into me. I need you… I need to be close to you… it's all that left." She was crying almost to hysterics. I pulled her into my arms pressing her head to my chest. She wrapped her arms around me and turned her face kissing my chest. "Edward please."

I pulled her away and she turned her face again. She wouldn't look at me. "Bella please… this isn't easy for me.. It's not easy for me to deny you. If you only knew how hard it was is for me… Im in pain over here. Please… I'll give you everything else. Can't you just be happy with that? You're so delicate… and im not perfect… I make mistakes… I slip sometimes with what we do now… did you look at my back seat? The moldings crushed.. That could have been you.

**BPoV**

My stomach hurt.. I know I was making a fool of myself. This was a stupid idea. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Sobs racked through my body as I pleaded with him over and over. But he wouldn't surrender to me. He wouldn't give in. I knew I shouldn't force him but if his only apprehension was him hurting me…I had to make him see that he wouldn't.

"Edward… cant you trust me? Cant you just trust that I have faith in you… enough for the both of us…If its something that we both want … then I know we can… together… we're so attuned to each other it would be like cakewalk. Please Edward please. I cried louder… more violently.. I couldn't control it. I was hearing what he was saying but it still felt like utter rejection to me. My heart was breaking and I was falling apart.

"Bella…" I was surprised to hear the unevenness in his voice. He pulled me to him again and kissed me everywhere…my lips…my face…my shoulders…my chest. "If you want me Edward…I'm yours… I don't care what happens… I'm all yours… please… if I move you in anyway don't deny me.

"Bella… My Bella… how can I sit here and not be moved by you?" He kissed me again this time less gentle as he laid me on my back. I could feel his indecision in the kiss as he moved between my legs. I opened to him and he trailed kisses down my neck over my collar bone then across my chest before taking my breasts in his hands. I moaned between the tears. He squeezed my breasts together eliciting another moan from me before he plunged his tongue into my mouth. We danced inside my mouth passionately before he pulled away. "You're gonna be the death of me Bella. You have no idea how badly I want you."

I acted quickly ripping his pants open and grabbing his rock hard cock. He groaned and mashed his lips back onto mine. I shifted my weight underneath him and used my feet to push his pants down. Edward was so preoccupied with what my hands were doing and kissing my neck that he didn't notice when I positioned him at my entrance. I could feel the cold emanating off of him and my body ached to feel him inside me, and right as I was about to try and put it in he cocked jumped in my hand.

Electricity shot through my body followedby mind shattering orgasm as his cock swept the over the entire length of my slit and then back down where he plunged deep into me. My body shook beneath him and I cried out screaming his name first in ecstasy and then in agony as the pain set in pulling my knees up. His head was at the side of mine his face pressed into the pillow as he pulled my hips going deeper.

The feeling was one that I can't put in words. It hurt like hell but felt unbelievably good at the same time. I felt whole… complete…I clung to him, moaning into his ear, bringing my body closer to him fighting through the pain.

He growled violently in my ear before slowly easing out of me. The whole time he was shaking and the vibrations caused me to moan and whimper as he pulled out.

He hovered over me growling and gripping into the bed. I knew it was probably the dumbest thing I could do at that point but I tried to pull him into me again. He growled and his jaw snapped as he pushed down on the bed. I could hear the frame snap beneath us and the box spring and mattress hit the floor.

"Bella. No!" he said through clenched teeth. I could see in the light from the candles that his eyes were the blackest I had ever seen them. It was frightening.

"Edward…I'm okay… see… I'm okay." He pushed away from me and I eyed his cock that was standing at full attention between us. He looked down at it, touched it, and then looked back up at me. His eyes were frantic.

"Are you okay? Bella are you okay? Answer me!" I stared at him to scared to answer but I did a mental body check…other than the obvious pain I felt from him ramming into me I was fine.

"Yes.. I'm fine Edward I'm fine." He stared at me for a second longer than looked at his fingers. He started shaking and then he stopped breathing.

"I hurt you…. You're bleeding." I looked at his fingers then looked down at the smear of red on my inner thigh. Edward jumped up from the bed and switched on the lights. His hear turned up towards the door.

"Don't move… just stay where you are." "Edward… its okay… that supposed to …"

"Would you just shut up for a minute?!" He barked at me. He ran into the bathroom and returned with a cold wash cloth. I didn't even have time to think before he grabbed my leg and pulled me towards him wiping the blood from my thigh and then pressing the cold washcloth to me. It was embarrassing to say the least.

"Jasper can smell this." I turned away from him and staringed out the window. From the corner of my eye I saw him lick his thumb and he pressed his icy finger into me. At first there was the burning sensation than everything went cold.

"There that should make it stop. Im sorry if I hurt you. I wish you would listen to me sometimes." He sat next to me but with his back turned gripping the edge of the bed stiff as a statue. I moved behind him pressing my chest to his back and wrapped my arms around him. I stroked his chest and kissed his neck until he calmed down leaning his head back against my shoulder.

"See…im okay…you didn't hurt me to bad… im not as delicate as you think I am." He reached up and grabbed on of my hands. "You screamed. It was gut wrenching. I don't ever want to hear you make that sound again. I lost control. Not enough to kill you but I hurt you. And do you see what I did to this bed… that could have been you. And look at my pillow… I bit it to keep from biting you."

"So do it."

"What?" he shrugged me off his shoulders and stood at the edge of the bed facing me. I could see fire in his eyes and knew that Alice was right. I wished I could have taken back what I said right then.

"What did you just say to me?" His voice was nearly as venomous as I knew his teeth were. I shrank away from him turning my face away trying to hide the tears that blurred my vision.

"What did you just say?!"

"Nothing…I didn't say anything"

"Isabella." He never once said my name that way. I didn't like it at all.

"I said go ahead and bite me."

"Why on earth would I do that? Do you want to die? Is that what you're trying to tell me?"

"No… Im trying to tell you… to tell you that I love you and I want to be with you… forever..."

He closed his clenching is fists into tight balls. "You can be with me forever. Your forever. Not mine. Your only 17 for god sake…."

"You're 17."

"I was dying… and I didn't have a choice."

"I'm dying… Im dying everyday. Everyday I get older…closer to death."

"That's the way it's supposed to be Bella. Humans get old... they die. That's the way it's supposed to be… I'm not supposed to be standing here having this conversation with you… I'm supposed to be in a box in the ground."

"But you're not. You're here… with me… where you claim you want to be. Anything could happen to me… I could get sick... I could get into an accident… some psycho could snatch me off the street. What are you gonna do if I die?"

"Follow you."

"What's that supposed to mean."

"I don't intend to live long after you. When we met… and you told me you loved me… I resolved to stay with you… for the all of _your_ days… for as long as you'll have me. And once you were gone…I would follow you."

"Are you talking about killing yourself? Are you saying you are going to commit suicide when I die?"

"If that's what you want to call it."

Anger coursed through me in that moment and before I realized I had reached out and smacked him across the face. My hang stung but not as much as the rage inside me burned.

"Don't you ever say anything like that to me again. Don't you ever even think that again. Do you hear me… that's the most absurd thing I have ever heard in my life… so don't you ever say that to me again."

Edward grabbed my shoulders to keep me from shaking. "Bella calm down…you're gonna make yourself pass out. What are you expecting me to do? I can't live with out you."

"I can't live without you either… It hurts to even think about it… but a world without you in it doesn't make sense to me. Promise me you won't keep thinking that. Promise me damn you!" I bit into my bottom lip pleading with my eyes for him to promise. He just looked down between us. "I wouldn't know what else to do. I wouldn't know how to be without the love of my life."

"Is that what you would want me to do?"

"Its different…I've lived a lifetime already… if something were to happen to me today… you still have your whole life ahead of you… marriage.. children… grandchildren."

I wrapped my arms and pulled my heartbroken crying body to his. "None of that means anything to me without you there to share it with me…life is meaningless with out you. If your love was all I had in this life… that would be enough until the end of time. I want to be with you forever and this is the only way I can." I turned my neck to his lips but he pushed me down onto the bed.

"So you want to be a monster?" "Edward… you aren't a monster. You're and angel. My angel. You all are. And it isn't about that. I'm choosing this because I want to be with you and one lifetime isn't enough for me. If for no other reason than to keep you alive."

"Bella… you're being ridiculous. Why cant having a long and happy life with me be enough for you.?"

"Edward… you can't even have sex with me… I don't want to be a virgin forever."

He laughed shaking his head. "What the hell is so funny?"

"Technically you aren't a virgin anymore…and I don't understand what's with you woman and sex… why is it so damn important?"

"What do you mean you women? Are you comparing me to Tanya?!" I jumped off the bed and grabbed his shirt that was lying on the couch throwing it on.

"Bella… I'm not having this discussion with you, what you are asking is out of the question. Do not bring it up again."

"You aren't the only vampire I know. I'll ask Alice.. She'll do it."

"Bella don't you dare. Are you that eager to be immortal?!"

"No!... Im that eager to be with you. Aren't you listening to me?"

He came up to my side and grabbed my hand pulling me onto the couch. "Bella… you are with me… why do you have to change anything."

"You said you'd give me anything else I wanted. This is what I want. I want you. Forever." Edward lowered his head in what I thought was defeat but he just growled at me again. "Bella… Stop it… you're really upsetting me. I will not take your life from you…and I will not allow anyone else to.

I tore my hand from his and ran over to the door. I couldn't even speak. Rejection racked through my body for the umpteenth time and it wasn't just him rejecting my body… he was rejecting my love for him. I felt like I was going to be sick. I had to get out of there. I pulled on the door handle but it wouldn't budge.

"Its locked…where are you going?"

I couldn't answer him. My stomach was twisting and turning and I felt like if I opened my mouth I would vomit everywhere. I finally got the door open and ran towards the stairs. I didn't even care that I was still wearing lingerie and one of Edwards's button down shirts. I took off down the stairs and tripped on the way down. Emmett caught me right before my face smashed into the floor.

"Whoa Bells, you okay? In an instant Alice, Edward, Esme, Jasper, and Carlisle were surrounding me. My face flushed red as I realized the stupid shirt was open but they all stared in my face trying not to look down. Another wave of nausea came over me and I clamped my hand over my mother and turned towards the garage door. I had to get out of there.

Emmett stepped out of the way as I ducked underneath him and ran down the stairs with Edwards Volvo keys in my hand. He was at my heels wrapping his arms around my waist before I could get in the car. Hot tears streamed down my face as I thrashed in arms trying to pull away.

"Edward let me go… let go of me."

He held me tighter against him holding my face still. "Bella… its late…you can be mad in the morning… just don't leave me here alone baby…please... Come back to bed… His voice had calmed and came out like silk. I could tell he was trying to dazzle me but I was too worked up. I thrashed against him and I thought he let me go but Alice had pulled me away from him.

"Let her go Edward. Bella calm down. Come back upstairs and talk to me. You can sleep in my room tonight." I ripped my arm away from her and jumped into his car.

"Let her go Edward… Let her gocalm down. I'll keep an eye on her. I watched her float back up the stairs and pulled away leaving my heart on knees in the middle of the garage.

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**A/N ducks from people throwing things at her. Okay okay... im sorry... I know you're angry but ill make it up to you... I promise wink wink. **

**Please review...and i promise the next chapter wont disappoint you. Its a long one and alot o stuff is going to happen and something completly new and unexpected happens....so if you wanna know what happens after Bella runs out....indulge me and I will satisfy your need for more.**


	24. Like O, Like H

**A/N Thanks so much for all the love and support on the last chapter and as promised here is your reward. An update roughly two days later. I sinceraly how you all enjoy this chapter as i worked very hard to perfect it. **

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**Like O, Like H**

**BPoV**

I drove and drove with hot tears streaming down my face. So many emotions ran through me: anger, humiliation, rejection, everything. I didn't pay attention to where I was going. I just drove. I ended up on some road that had led me into patch of trees. Fearing that I was lost I slowed the car looking for some sign that civilization was around… possibly Edward had followed me. But there was nothing. I was utterly alone and then as if a gift from God, moonlight shined down on a road sign, the reflection blinding me.

_La Push._

I recognized this place from my childhood, coming here to visit Billy Black and his kids with Charlie. Billy was actually with him on his little vacation. I stopped the car once I came to the familiar beach I had played at on many occasions as a child. It was peaceful, the moon reflected off the water and I felt a strange peace come over me. I climbed out of the car and pulled the blanket from Edwards's back seat and walked down to the shore line, my feet cold in the sand.

Part of me knew I was possibly overreacting. It wasn't like I didn't know how Edward felt about his life, but I thought he loved me enough to think that he would never want to be without me… didn't he see this was the only way. Still I couldn't help but feel the rejection. What if it _was_ the same situation with Tanya? How long had he stayed with her until he realized that he didn't love her the way he tried to force him to?

I sat on a large piece of driftwood, pulling the blanket around me and cried silently to myself. What would happen now? Would he leave me like Alice said? The thought of that sent a painful chill through my body. Please God anything but that. After spending these few months falling truly in love with him, the thought of not having in my life frightened me. Being alone frightened me. Being on this beach suddenly felt eerie and ominous. I needed to be with him. I needed him here to hold me and tell me everything would be alright… that we would figure this out together…get past everything together…I needed him to tell me that I would never have to be without him. I rose to go back to the car but a rustling in the trees stopped me in my tracks. It was too violent and loud and there was no wind blowing. I realized how stupid it was for me to be here this late at night alone. Something Edward had said to me a while back about being in the woods behind my house alone rang to my recollection. _There are worst things roaming these woods than me._ I waited frozen with fear, unable to move, waiting for what ever it was to either go away or show itself.

**EPoV**

"Alice where is she?" I paced back and forth wearing a hole in her carpet. Bella. My Bella. How could I be so stupid? How could I talk to her like that?

"She's fine Edward she's just driving." Her voice was icy and I could hear in her thoughts that she was pissed at me. _Dumbass. You could have been nicer about it. Bringing up Tanya? Are you really that dense? You humiliated her. And with Tanya here no less._

"Why didn't you warn me? Why didn't you tell me that she was going to plan something like this?"

"Edward… I don't watch everything she does. Excuse me for trying to give you some privacy." Jasper had his head in her lap reading one of his war books trying to dispel the agitation in the room when suddenly he gasped and I turned to see Alice gripping in to his chest probably hard enough to break skin. Her face was frozen in horror but her thoughts were blank. Just white light. It scared the shit out of me. I had never seen that before. Terror and panic washed over me leaving me frozen where I stood.

"Be… Be… Bella…" Her bottom lip trembled and Jasper pulled her to his chest. "What is it Alice. What do you see?"

"Nothing… I see nothing… I see...Oh Edward… Oh God Edward she's gone… I don't see her…I cant… she… Oh God no…." she said in a whisper.

Her words pulled me out of my trance and I jumped in front her grabbing her hand.

"What do you mean you can't see her?"

She shook her head frantically sobbing loudly. He voice rang through the house chilling me to the core. It was loud enough to send the entire family barreling into the room. Esme was the first through the door. Her thoughts were full of panic. Alice's arms crushed around me but I couldn't react. The impact of Alice's words was settling in and the white light inside her head had my heart breaking into a million pieces. My eyes burned with an unfamiliar burning. Something that I had not felt in over 90 years. Tears.

"Would someone please tell me what the hell is going on here?!" Esme yelled. She ran to my side and pulled Alice away looking into her face. She looked as if she would faint. Esme eyes turned to mine and she gasped at the hot acidic tears that fell from my eyes.

"What the… What… Someone say something please…. Please… Carlisle.. Edwards crying.. tears… Oh God start talking… someone Jesus… I cant take it."

Jaspers voice broke through Esmes sobs, pained from all the frustration and dread in the room. "Alice can't see Bella… She… We think she might be… She's just gone." Carlisle ran to my side. I couldn't move. It felt like someone had just torn me apart and set my pieces on fire. "Emmett call the hospital and the police station. See if they have any information."

"I have to find her!"

I jumped up and ran to the front door. If she was hurt I had to find her. If she got into and accident they might not find her in time. I could hear Tanya laughing from upstairs and Alice snarl as she attacked her, but I kept running.

**BPoV**

Relief washed over me as out from the trees walked… a boy. Well he looked more like a man really. He was wearing black sweatpants and no shirt. His muscles were well defined like Edwards. He walked slowly over to me and the closer he got the more familiar he was.

"Jacob? Jacob Black?"

He jogged towards me with a suspicious look on his face. "Bella?"

"Oh My God… Jacob." Jacob had been my only real friend as a kid. He was one of the only things I enjoyed about visiting Forks but I hadn't seen him since I had been back. Charlie told me he was away at school when I asked about him. In my excitement I threw my arms around him forgetting that I was barely dressed. "Oh My God Jacob I'm so happy to see you."

"Bella… What are you… what are you doing down here? Its 1 in the morning." "Oh... It's stupid really… I was upset and just started driving. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going and I ended up here. I'm not like trespassing am I?" "Yea… but its okay. I won't tell." He smiled a big toothy smile and my heart warmed. It felt weird. Then I noticed he was looking at my bare legs and I felt my cheeks flush red. I snatched the blanket pulling it around me. We sat on the driftwood log and started talking…catching up. The feeling was weird. I was so oddly comfortable with him. Like when I met Alice. We talked as if we saw each other everyday. I didn't know how much time had passed but my eyelids started to get heavy. I yawned and he laughed.

"It is really late. "

"Yea… My boyfriends probably freaking out. I should get back. It was great seeing you though. I didn't even know you were back."

"Yea, I don't get up to forks much. I'm not home much either really… but with Billy being with you dad someone had to watch the house."

"Yea… It was really nice of Carli…Im mean Dr. Cullen to give my dad those tickets. His eyes widened with shock for a moment. "Dr. Cullen sent your Dad on that vacation. Where are you staying?"

"At the Cullens. I'm dating Edward Cullen." Hopefully I added mentally. Jacob grabbed my hand and started to pull me with some unknown fear in his eyes. "Bella, its late… to late for you to drive all the way back to the Cullens tonight. Let's go back to my house. You can call them…let them know you're okay… and stay at my place. "

I pulled my hand away from his and rubbed my wrist where his hand had been. It felt like he was burning me. "No… Jacob… its okay… Edward and I had a fight… I should go back. Besides I don't think he'd be okay with me staying at some other guy's house that he doesn't know. I'll give you a call tomorrow though…let you know im okay."

"Bella…Charlie and Billy would never forgive me if they know I could have prevented something bad from happening to you." His eyes were pleading with me and I laughed anxiously… he was acting weird. What the hell was going on with him? "Jacob… really… I'll be fine. Now that I know where I am I'll have no problem getting home. I'll tell you what… I was gonna go home and change so I'll call you when I get there so you know I got back to forks okay…"

"Bella… please." He moved to take my hand but I backed away. "Get back to your place Jacob… I'll be calling you soon." I turned and ran stumbling back to the car. That was so awkward.

EPoV

I ran and ran looking for some sign of her. The problem was I didn't know where to look. I just ran blindly hoping to pick up her scent. I searched the thoughts of the few people that were out on the streets. A few derelicts, a passing cruiser.

Nothing.

I ran to Angela's house, no sign of her there. Then I tried her house. Nothing. I searched the woods…everywhere I could think of… I got nothing. Could she have left Forks? Maybe she left Forks and got into an accident. I took of running in the trees beside the highway. Traffic flowed too smoothly for there to have been an accident.

Fuck! Where is she…? Where is my heart…. Where the fuck is she?!?!?!

My eyes were burning and I didn't think the tears were going to ever stop. It felt like my eyeballs were melting. I stopped by a brook splashing water in my face trying to cool the fire when my phone rang.

"What… what is it?" It was Emmett. He was laughing. Relief washed over me. He wouldn't laugh if he didn't have good news.

"Man you missed on hell of a fight."

"What?"

"Alice just whooped Tanya's ass… I mean she dragged her outside and really got in her. It was the funniest thing I've ever seen. Even Esme screaming at her couldn't get her to stop. It took me, Jasper, and Carlisle to pull her off." He laughed harder and I wanted to reach through the phone and rip his fucking head-off.

"Emmett I don't fucking care about that!"

"Okay. Okay. Calm down…Damn."

"How can you expect me to…"

"Bella's at home. She's fine. Alice just saw her. She's …" I didn't listen to another word. I dropped the phone and ran faster than I have ever run in my entire existence. I ran like the devil himself was chasing after me. I ran so fast that I didn't even bother trying to hide it. I leapt across the highway landing on the median and with out pause jumped again and just ran to her.

My heart… it was beating…it was alive and safe…. Thank the Lord in heaven for even though I was damned he had blessed me yet again. I ran to her door throwing it open. She was standing in refrigerator doorway innocently drinking a glass of water.

"Bella."

**BPoV**.

I whirled around to see Edward standing in my kitchen door way. I didn't even hear him come in.

Before I could open my mouth to speak he ghosted across the floor grabbing me into his arms crushing his lips to mine. The glass slipped from my hand and by the time I heard it fall we were already upstairs.

Edward kissed me with such ferocity I knew my lips would be swollen. But I didn't care. He'd forgiven me. He was here and that was all that matters. Hot tears streamed down my face as relief washed over me. He loved me…he wasn't going to leave me. Alice was wrong.

He laid me down on the bed kneeling between my legs looking over me. His eyes searched over my face, my arms, and my legs everywhere.

"Edward.. What… what are you looking for?" "Oh My Bella… Bella…my heart… my Bella." He kissed every inch my face…my neck… everywhere. I started getting dizzy and couldn't breathe. I felt like I was blacking out. I pushed him away so I could breathe and he stared back at me incredulously. I rolled over to turn on the lamp and gasped. Where his eyes were usually clear white they were red and bloodshot. Like he had been crying.

"Edward what's wrong? What wrong with your eyes?" "You disappeared. One minute she saw you driving and the next you were gone… you were just gone… I was so scared. There was nothing but white light in her head… Bella we thought you were dead."

He pulled me up crushing his lips to mine again. I grabbed his face kissing him back as hard as I could. I some how had managed to scare the hell out of him and poor Alice. I wondered for a second why that had happed but then I felt Edwards's lips on my neck and couldn't thinking of anything else but the feeling of his cold body pressed against mine.

His hands were gentle as he snaked them into my hair lying me back down on the bed. I wrapped my arms around him holding him close to me trying to soothe him. Edward grabbed my calf hitching my leg around his waist pressing his erection to me. I moaned and grabbed his face pulling him to my lips. His tongue searched every corner of my mouth as he ran his hand over my side grabbing my breast. He squeezed it and we both moaned at the same time. He hands crept into the strap pulling it off my shoulder pulling my top down. I whimpered when he pulled his lips away but gasped when his icy tongue circled my nipple. I grabbed his head pulling him to me more and he started sucking causing me to shudder.

"Oh God… Edward that feels so good."

He murmured something inaudibly into my breast and pulled the other side of my top down completely exposing me. Before I knew the entire it the outfit was gone, tiny G-string and all. Alice was right about something that day after all.

**EPoV**

I didn't even think twice it as I pulled the tiny outfit off her. Her arousal hit me hard but there was no pooling of venom this time… there was just my lust. My overwhelming lust. I loved her and I wanted her and she was beautiful … and she was here alive in front of me.

"Edward are you okay?"

She had leaned up putting her hands on my waist. I leaned down taking her face between my hands and kissed her softly on the lips. She pressed herself closer to me kissing me harder. Her tiny hands gripped my waist and she moaned softly as I trailed my hands down over her neck, shoulders, and arms taking her hands in mine. I pulled them along my stomach to the front of my pants. Her touch set fire to my skin.

She pulled away looking confused and pulled my pants open. I stared into her lustful, hopeful eyes fighting the urge to throw her down and plunge into her as I had mistakenly done before. In a second I both cringed and felt high at the memory. He scream was bloodcurdling but she felt… so amazing. I dare to say the feeling was better than drinking her blood.

She got on her knees in front of me pressing against me as I let her push my pants and boxers down. My achingly hard cock sprang out between us and she looked down at it touching me. It sent chills up my spine and I pulled her close to me thrusting her against my body.

**BPoV**

I was afraid to continue. I knew my ego couldn't take another blow if he rejected me again but something in his eyes told me that wouldn't happen. I started getting dizzy again when I felt his hands roaming my body. He trailed his hands over every inch of me slowly as he kissed me ever so gently. I wrapped my arms around his neck pressing myself closer to him. I needed to feel him against me. My body was on fire and I badly need him to put it out.

I kissed his neck and shoulders grabbing his cock in my hand. He groaned and grabbed me by my thighs pulling my legs around his waist. I felt him against me and he growled which in turn made me so hot that I opened my legs wider pressing myself against him more. His body went stiff between my legs and he growled again low in my ear.

"Do we need to stop?" I whispered in his ear hoping he'd say no. His voice was pure silk and I felt a stream of wetness pool between my legs. "No. We're not gonna stop. I want you." He turned his face to mine and his eyes were dark and heavy but not scary like they were before. Lust dripped from them and I crushed my lips to his feeling overwhelmed.

His hand slowly came over my thigh and I gasped into his lips as two of fingers entered me. It hurt from before but he went slow pumping them in and out. I moaned and arched my back into his chest. He held me close to him his tongue dancing inside my mouth. I slowly moved on his hand trying to increase the pressure as his knuckles pressed into my clit with every thrust. I let my head fall back enjoying the feeling and felt that tingling heat creep up from my toes again.

"Faster Edward… I'm so close" He moaned when I said his name and pressed his icy lips to my ear sending shivers through. He moved his fingers faster and whispered in my ear. "Cum for me Bella." As if on command an orgasm rippled thorough my body and I cried out his name.

"Fuck….Edward… Oh God." My chest was heaving as he laid my on my back moving between my legs. He kissed me once more hungrily… passionately and then slowly letting me come down off my high. I wrapped my arms around his back bringing my legs up and he pressed himself against me. We stared into each others eyes for a moment. A silent exchange that I was ready and then he slowly pushed into me.

**EPov**

She slowly pulled her legs up opening herself to me and I could feel the heat emanating from her melting me. I pressed myself against her feeling how dripping wet she was. Some animal in my brain was telling me to just plunge into her but I waited. We stared into each others and from the way her breathing stilled I knew it was okay. I pressed my lips to her and entered her slowly and gently…. and oh…

If there was a heaven for me it would be between Bella's legs.

She whimpered into my mouth once I had pushed all the way in and felt something that I had never felt before. The first time I had felt her was nothing compared to this. It was fucking bliss. Sweet Sweet fucking bliss. I stilled giving her time to adjust to my size. Unfortunately fortunately for her I was as they say well- endowed.

Her hands pushed my waist and then pulled me back. And I slowly pulled away and then thrust back into her. She moaned and gripped her fingers into my hair. I waited again to make sure she wasn't hurt but then she wrapped one of her legs around my waist pulling me more into her.

"More…please don't stop… please…oh god you feel so good."

I pumped into her again grabbing her other thigh pulling it around me. I kept thrusting at a slow pace trying to keep my control. It was hard but manageable… and this was amazing.

"God… you have no idea how this feels to me… you're sooo tight… so wet… Oh God Bella"

I kissed her again pumping into her and soon she was rocking beneath me meeting every thrust. One of her hands pulled my hair and her other gripped the bed as she cried out in pleasure moaning and saying my name over and over. She was fueling a raging fire that burned within me with every thrust I felt like I was plunging deeper into her soul. Her back arched up against me and her head rolled back exposing her neck. I could almost see the blood coursing through her veins and felt my grip on her tightening. Something inside me told me to let her go so I grabbed her bed instead with such a force that I felt my fingers go through the mattress.

She had wrapped her arms around my back and pulling herself into me. I leaned back and pulled her up on to my lap and she was used the bed for leverage. Our bodies rocked violently into each other and for a second I was afraid I had her hurt but she rolled her head up meeting my gaze and attacked my lips. I didn't even have time to stop her before she drove tongue into my mouth and I was surprised that she had the frame of mind to be cautious of my teeth. This new sensation took over me and I gripped into her waist pulling her into me harder.

Her head rolled back in ecstasy… her breathing jagged and labored but she kept moving. She pulled my head down to her neck and even though I knew I shouldn't I let myself kiss her. I could feel her hot blood under my lips and pushed her down on the bed. Our hips never stopped moving together and before I knew there was a tightening feeling in my stomach.

"Bella… Fuck Bella… I'm so close…" I lifted her hips letting my cock run over her g-spot and her body shuddered around me.

"Fuck Omg… Edward… keeping ..... go…ing… jus… like… that… oh… God…."

She screamed again and her walls came crashing down on me. She grabbed me wildly and neck came flying at my open mouth. I pushed her away sinking my teeth tearing wildly into the pillow next to her head. The added pressure from her orgasm sent me flying over the edge and I grabbed the headboard above her head tearing it apart as I exploded.

I screamed some obscenity into her pillow and collapsed spent on to her. She groaned and I quickly rolled off her and she rolled with me.

"That was amazing." Her lips crushed into mine and her kiss grounded me. She apparently didn't notice the feathers everywhere and ripped in half headboard because she half crawled over my body and within seconds her breathing stilled and she was fast asleep.

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**A/N Bella is such a guy...always falling asleep after she finishes lol. Sooooo... what didya think???? **

**I worked my butt off on this chapter so please please please please please reveiw and if you give me love like you did the last time ill post the next chapter which has more lemony goodness and a part from soneone else PoV that ill think you'll enjoy... come...show me you want it....**

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	25. Ava Adore

**A/N Sorry it took so long to update but I've been kinda busy and i was actually hoping for more reviews for the last chatper... But oh well...Beggars cant be greedy. Thanks to everyone who read...and even more thanks to those who reviewd.**

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**Ava Adore**

**EPOV**

The morning light crept into Bella's window sending beams of light over her. She scrunched her face up hiding in my side and threw her arm over my waist. She slept peacefully. She seemed okay. She survived me. I wanted to do it again

Come on Bella… wake up… I want you… over and over and over again.

Finally she stirred reaching for me as she always does. "Morning,." She sat up smiling and the blanket fell from around her. I gasped in horror. Were my eyes playing tricks on me? She was covered in bruises.

"Why are you looking at me like that? Fix your face. You're freaking me out." I pulled her to face me and she winced in pain. "Ow. I'm a little sore." She shot a panicked look at me. "No big deal though. I'm fine really. Don't freak out."

"How could I not? God Bella, look what I did to you." She moved the blanket, looked herself over and smiled at me. There was a perfect impression of my hand print on her thigh and waist.

"Hey, I'm alive though right." I growled at her but she just laughed and threw her arms around my neck. "Oh don't over react Edward. I have bruises all the time. At least these are fun bruises and I get to have your hands on me all day. " She laughed and I hung my head feeling ashamed of myself. I had bruised her beautiful body. I didn't deserve her.

"Don't be so nonchalant about this. Be honest, how badly are you hurting?"

"I'm fa…"

"Bella, if you value my sanity at all do not say fine."

"Okay… I'm great then. I mean I'm a little sore but that's just because I had such a great workout." She bit into her bottom lip and looked back at me with a devilish grin on her face. "If im not mad than you shouldn't be either."

"You're never mad at anything."

"The past two days should prove that isn't true, however I will honestly be pissed if you ruin the moment for me. Don't dull my afterglow Edward. I'll never forgive you."

I exhaled in defeat. She was right. It could have been worse and she seemed fine. "Settle with me then. Will you let Carlisle look you over and make sure I didn't bruise anything we can't see?"

Her face drained of all its color and then flushed red so quickly that venom leaked into my mouth. I swallowed it down hoping she wouldn't notice.

"Do I have to go back? I made such a fool of myself. And I mean how are we gonna explain…this." I couldn't help but to laugh at her. "Bella they know. You missed all the congratulatory phone calls. Besides Alice wants to see you. Like I told you… you scared the shit out of us last night."

BPoV

I got up showered and changed while Edward cleaned up the mess in my room. As I stupidly stared at myself in the mirror wondering if I looked different, I thought about how last night had gone from heartbreakingly horrible to absolutely amazing. I didn't look any different, just happy. Very happy. Ecstatic almost. I couldn't stop smiling. When I went back to my room Edward was sitting on my window sill. The sun was shining and his shirtless body sparkled. I stared at him for a moment feeling like was I was about to drool when he crossed the room in the blink of an eye. He wrapped his arms around me and pressed his lips to mine.

"Did I tell you I loved you today?

"No…but then again I've only been up for an hour. We still have the whole day ahead of us if you know what I mean." I winked and ran my hands over his chest. He closed his eyes and bit into his bottom lip.

"God you're sexy."

"You're insatiable" He smiled that sexy crooked smile. "But im okay with it. Let's get back to my house before Alice calls again and then we can spend the rest of the day doing what…ever… you… like." I shivered in his arms at the thought of being in bed with him all day…having him kiss all over my body…being inside me. I had a sudden longing for him. An ache dying to be soothed in a way that only he could. He was smiling like the Cheshire cat while he led me into the woods and pulled me up into his arms instead of tossing me on his back like he normally would. What a difference a day makes. I wonder if he had changed his mind about anything else. He kissed me again, this time long and passionately, before he took off running.

**TANYA PoV**

Edward and Bella came waltzing into the house glowing like fucking newlyweds. I felt like vomiting. They weren't married and he slept with the cunt. He was such a liar. While we were together he told me he wanted to wait until after the wedding. In the few days that I've been here they did more than we ever had. I can't believe he actually slept with her… and didn't kill her. I should.

Shit. Edward shot an angry glance at me then looked to Alice who was sitting in the corner of the room in Jaspers lap glaring at me like she was ready to pounce if I said anything.

Everyone started fussing over that twat. Esme grabbed Bella into her arms kissing all over her face whining about how relieved she was that she was safe and saying how scared they had been when Alice couldn't see her. Maybe Alice couldn't see her because she was nothing to see. Just an ordinary, plain looking, fowl smelling, human girl that had _My_ Edward wrapped around her little sausage fingers. That little bitch had everything I wanted. The Cullens never warmed up to me the way they did to her and I lived with them for years. Rosalie was my only ally and even she looked a little relieved that this Bella brat was okay… traitor.

They walked into kitchen talking about where Bella had gone when Alice couldn't see her, all focused on her like she was the fucking sun and they were little planets caught in her orbit. I'd love to watch her burn alright. Edward growled from the kitchen. "What is it?" Alice that little pixie bitch asked him. "Tanya." he spat. Why couldn't he say my name nicely just once? The way I heard it in my fantasies. The fantasies where recently he and I would make love in a tub of his precious Bella's blood. Edward came and stood in the kitchen doorway glaring at me.

"What?" I asked mockingly. "Stop it Tanya. Just give it a rest okay. You're really starting to piss me off."

"Oh Edward please. If you don't like what you hear than stop listening. " He narrowed his eyes and I rolled mine back. Kate came and sat down next to me on the couch with this sorry look on her face.

"What Kaitlyn?"

"I just wanted to say im sorry… you know about last night and the fight and the whole thing with Edward. It must suck to have him choose her over you… and to this extent… you must feel like butt."

Irina just shook her head. "You know I told you to give up on Edward a long time ago. If you hadn't insisted on us staying _here,_ then you wouldn't have to suffer through this embarrassment." I hissed at her but she just rolled her eyes. "Don't you worry about me. I'll get him. Trust me." "What ever it is you're planning Alice will probably see it first. I've seen what happens to the wicked and proud when they decide to try and talk on the throne for the crown. You got your ass handed to you last night, I wouldn't cross her again "

"That's enough Irina. Fighting Edwards sister is not going to help my cause any. Maybe he'll feel sorry for me."

"I wont!" he called from the kitchen.

Carlisle led Bella upstairs mumbling something about checking her over while Edward followed behind them like a faithful little doggie. It's sickening to watch. He was never like that with me. I hoped Edward twisted her insides into knots and she was going to die a slow painful death but from the sounds of it all she had was some bruises and a pulled muscle in her leg. Un-fucking-believable.

**EPoV**

"So she's okay?" Bella had gone to change back into her clothes. I felt bad about subjecting her to such embarrassment but luckily Carlisle was completely professional and waited until _after_ she left the room to grin at me. Emmett and Jasper came barreling into the office with big cheeses on the faces. Oh boy, I thought to myself. Here we go...

"Man when Alice told us what you were going to do, I started packing. We thought for sure you were gonna break her in half." Emmett was laughing but I could see the shock in his eyes.

Carlisle sat at his desk with his feet up and his fingers linked behind his head. "So my boy's become a man." He started laughing and I was feeling more embarrassed by the second. "Finally." He rolled his eyes and laughed.

"So spill the details man!!! How the hell did you manage not to bite her?" Jasper was staring at me with his eyes wide open on the edge of his seat. I rubbed the back of my neck and looked away. They didn't actually expect me to tell them everything?

"I don't know. I just didn't. I mean at one point I wanted to and her throat was right there… but I bit a pillow instead… and then I broke her headboard." Emmett was rolling on the floor laughing. "See what all that pent up sexual frustration does to a person. I told you. See no one ever listens to me and im always right." I rolled my eyes at him but he kept laughing anyway. Then they all started laughing at the big smile that invaded my face. Somewhere in my ever running mind was a flash of Bella's face while she moaned my name. I shifted in the chair feeling myself getting hard and this was certainly not the place for that.

"Alright enough guys. Edward how are your eyes feeling? Come let me take a look at them." I had forgotten all about the searing pain that I had last night. I didn't feel anything now so I assumed I was fine though I hadn't had a chance to check in the mirror. Carlisle flashed his penlight in my eyes nodded and then went back to his chair. "That was quite an oddity but your fine. Let me know if you have any discomfort on notice any changes in your vision." He dropped his business like manner and smirked again. " We'll have to celebrate big time this weekend. Unless, you wanna cancel Edward… I'd completely understand if you had other things in mind" Carlisle smirked again causing Em and Jasper to bust out laughing again. I sometimes marveled at how quickly Carlisle could switch from his professional attitude to being "one of the boys" so quickly.

"No, we'll still go. I have to keep my thirst in check even more so now." I couldn't help smiling at myself. One time and I was already itching to do it again. "But on a more serious note what do you think happened last night with Alice's visions? Do you think it has something to do with the fact that Bella was down at La Push?" Carlisle looked thoughtful for a moment then shrugged his shoulders.

"Possibly. Maybe because we can't go there Alice can't even see there. Did you catch the name of the friend she ran into? Its was kinda late for someone to be roaming around the beach."

"No I didn't. When I asked her about it she said and old family friend. Someone she used to play with as a kid."

"Well if Bella has a friend down there maybe she could go back and we'll ask Alice if she disappears again" Both Carlisle and I whipped our heads to look at Jasper at the same time answering at the same time.

"No, that's too dangerous."

"If something were to happen to her we would have no way of knowing." Carlisle added." Edward I suggest you find out if Bella intends to return to La Push anytime soon. See if you can talk her out of it if she does."

"You're right. I'll go talk to her now." "Talking… that's what you crazy kids are calling it these days" Emmett chimed in doing finger quotes in the air. Everyone started laughing again and Emmett smacked me on the shoulder before I could make it out of the room.

**BPoV**

God that was so embarrassing .Carlisle had pretty much been my doctor since that night with Mike but it was always for things like me falling down or hitting my head, stupid things like that. Not checking for bruised ribs after I had sex with his son. I had sex with his son. Me and Edward had sex. Ahsome. Thoughts of last night ran through my head as Alice floated into the room.

"Esme asked me to bring you up some ice for that uh…pulled muscle." I could see that she was fighting back a grin. She sat Indian style on the bed with an eager expression on her face waiting for me to speak. All I could do was blush. "Oh come on Bella, are you really gonna make me ask for the details?"

"I was kinda hoping you wouldn't." "Well then you must not know me very well. Spill!" She rolled over on to her stomach propping her head up in her hands with her feet in the air. "What do you want to know?" "How was it? Is he any good? Is he...you know… big?" I blushed a deeper shade of red and looked away.

"Oh God Alice, that's your brother." "Not by blood. Come on this is girl talk. I'm curious! I'll tell you about Japer if you tell me about Edward." "I don't wanna hear about Jasper." She pouted and I instantly felt guilty. "Oh come on, you're no fun. Just spill."

"Fine Alice. It was amazing. He just walked in and said my name and the next thing I knew we were in bed and he wasn't stopping and it was incredible. And yes it is big." She gasped and leaned up on her knees laughing. "How big?" "Alice" I guffawed. "Okay fine. Length or girth? Can't you at least tell me that?" "A little of both. More so girth." I answered through gritted teeth. God I hoped he couldn't hear me. "Wow… Jasper is more pencilesque but he writes so well it doesn't matter." We both broke into a fit of laughter at her innuendo as Edward waltzed into the room.

He smiled pretending he didn't hear us and Alice made it worse by saying "See you later big guy" on her way out. I probably looked like a damn tomato when he came to sit next to me.

"How do you feel love? I'd say Im sorry about your thigh but for some reason im not." He leaned over me and snaked his icy hand into my pants over my pulled muscle pressing his lips to mine. I leaned more into his kiss getting dizzy from his saccharine scent. My eyes rolled back in my head when he started massaging my leg trailing kisses down my neck.

"Ungh…Edward that feels so good." He brought his eyes back up to mine and kissed me running his tongue along the inside of my lips causing me to quiver. "I love it when you say my name like that Bel_la… say it again." He whispered into my ear letting my name roll of his tongue and I damn near melted. I soooo liked where this was going.

"Edward" I moaned and this time _he_ quivered and pressed his body closer to mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and clawed at his shirt so he would pull it off. He straddled my waist and dropped his shirt over my eyes. I went to move it but he stopped me.

"No. Leave it. I want everything I do to you to be a surprise." Within seconds my pants were off and I was trembling with anticipation. His fingertips grazed my thighs and then his lips as he slowly pulled my pants down. He moved in between my legs and I felt his icy thighs against mine pushing my legs open.

"Ow." I tried so hard to hold it in but my legs muscles were aching. He pulled the shirt off my face his eyes full of concern. "Did I hurt you?" "No…my thighs are just a little sore. Its okay.. Please, don't let that stop you. Really." He smiled down at me and this lowered his head kissing me sweetly. "Why don't we wait until you feel a little better, I wouldn't want to make it any worse?" A disappointed whine escaped me but I knew he was right. He pulled his boxers back up and crawled into bed with me. I snuggled close to him and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"So last night was pretty amazing." I said as we stared at the TV. I was trying to ignore his boner that was begging for me to jump on it. He pressed my hand against it making me hold it down closing his eyes leaning his head back on the headboard. "Your warmth. It's unbelievably nice." I smiled pressing myself up to him more. "And yes last night was very amazing. Minus the mishap before you ran out. I'm very sorry about that. I know it must have hurt you." "Its okay… I'll take that kinda hurt from you any day." I looked up just in time to catch him rolling his eyes at me.

"About last night. What was your friend's name? You know the one you ran into?" "Jacob Black." For a split second I could have sworn he stiffened. "Don't worry. He's an old family friend. Not an ex-fiancée or anything like that." This time I was the one to roll my eyes but he just laughed. "I haven't seen him for years. He was away at school but he's here house sitting while his Dad's away with Charlie."

"Oh, are you planning on going to see him again?" "Probably not until Charlie comes back home. It was weird, one minute everything was fine, and we were laughing catching up and then he started acting all weird when I mentioned your name. You don't know him do you?"

He narrowed his eyes at me for a moment. "No. I don't know him. But its good that you aren't gonna go back there. If he weirded you out then I don't think you should." He turned his attention back to the TV playing with my hair and before long I had fallen asleep. We spent the majority of the day in bed watching TV and talking save for him making me dinner and wrestling with Emmett over his jokes and comments over my "battle scars" as he put it. Later that night Edward deciding to go hunting and promised to be back before it was time to go the fair.

I awoke the next afternoon late. The muscle relaxers Carlisle had given me knocked me out and it was great to get sleep like that. The last few days had been emotionally draining with the fighting me and Edward had done. My ringing phone was what woke me up. It was Angie.

"Hey" I answered yawning into the phone. "Sorry. I just woke up."

"Long night?" I could hear the smile in her voice. "Not last night. Edward went camping with his brothers." "Well I was just calling to male sure you were still coming tomorrow." "Yea, the whole family is coming actually." "Oh, cool. So anything else you wanna tell me?" I paused for a second thinking of how I would relay what happened that night. I omitted the whole fight and skipped right to Edward walking in the door and grabbing me. So I fabricated it a little. Sue me. I told her the gist of it minus all the bruising and the drama and she squealed with excitement.

"Wow, the Cullens are a lot more carefree then they let on. You're so lucky. Bens mom like freaked on us when she found out. Ofcouse that because she found the industrial size box of condoms under his bed. Damn Sam's Club." We both laughed and then Angela had to go. I noticed then that I had 3 missed calls from some unknown number but shrugged my shoulders. If the didn't leave a message it obviously wasn't that important. I called Charlie and Renee to check in with them, got dressed and went to find Alice. She was waiting on the couch with a giant pizza and a stack of movies.

"I thought you'd never get up. It's just you and me tonight Bella." She flashed her big warm smile at me as I plopped down next to her on the couch taking a slice of pizza. Hours passed with us watching movies and talking and giggling. By the time I woke up the next day Edward was back lying in bed next to me waiting for me to wake up.

"Morning Love."

"Oh you're back early. I wasn't expecting you until lunch time." "It is lunch time. You've been sleeping all morning. Go brush so I can kiss you." I did just that and attempted to hop back into the bed but tripped and landed with my face in Edwards lap.

"Whoa… don't you wanna at least kiss me hello first?" he said laughing pulling me into his lap. I kissed him hard on the mouth and simultaneously our hands ran up each others backs into our hair.

"Mmmhhhh, I missed you." He rolled me over onto my back running his hand over my cheek then leaned down kissing me again letting his lips linger over mine. My mind was getting foggier by the second and I welcomed it as he kissed down my neck. He murmured something else in my skin and his icy breathe sent chills over me.

My trembling fingers grabbed them hem of his shirt and he leaned back so I could pull it off. I leaned over him kissing down his neck letting my hands trail over his chest and down to the bugle in his pants. He groaned pushing his back into the pillow when I grabbed it and squeezed. "Boy are you happy to see me?" I said looking up at him from his waist. He looked down at me, his golden eyes sparkling. "I sure am." and there it was again, that sexy crooked smile he does that turns me to putty in his hands. I undid his pants and he lifted his hips so I could pull them down. I moved in between his knees running my fingers up his thighs and freed him from his boxers. He was rock hard and my mouth started to water I wanted him so bad. How could something that was normally so unappealing to look at be so beautiful?

"Take you top off Bella." I obliged and leaned down kissing him stomach. He lay perfectly still until my tongue ran over the head of his cock. I did it again eliciting a small moan from him but I wanted to hear more. I took the him into my mouth sucking the tip and he moaned louder, but still I wanted more so I slowly took more of him in, bobbing my head, taking more and more in each time. He trembled beneath me and from the corner of my eye I saw him gripping the sheets on the bed. I took him all the way in his hands shot off the bed grabbing fistfuls of my hair pushing me down. "Shhhhiiiii. My God Bella that feels amazing." I let him set a pace for me and he kept moaning until his breaths turned in to short gasps.

I didn't even have time to react before he had tossed me over onto my back and was kneeling between my legs and pulling my panties off tossing them on to the floor. "God I want you so bad. You have no idea how crazy you make me Bella. He leaned down kissing me passionately running one hand over my thigh sore. "Are you feeling better?" "Yes." I murmured into his mouth tangling my fingers in his hair. "Are you sure you aren't just saying that. I don't want to hurt you." He pulled his face away looking at me all concerned.

"Yes Edward, I promise you I'm okay."

He smiled and returned his lips to mine. The fog was coming back and I moaned as his fingers danced across my waist and feathered on my clit. My back arched into him and my heart was racing as he sucked the skin at the base of my neck. He pressed his thumb into my clit making small circles and I squirmed grabbing his wrist. Two his fingers entered me and the simultaneous stimulation had me feeling like I was about to explode. His hand moved faster between my legs and with in seconds I was panting and gasping for air. His voice was velvety as he leaned close to my ear and his icy breath was an added sensation cooling the fire that raged beneath the surface of my skin. "Cum for me Bella." My mind snapped and my hips bore down on his fingers deep inside me curling over my spot. I clutched onto his shoulders, an orgasm rattling through me.

His hand grabbed the under side of my knee pushing it up to my body and before I could come down he pressed against my entrance. "Fuck you're so wet." He bit into his bottom lip waiting for me to give him the okay. I grabbed his wrists bracing myself and he slowly tapped his way in. This teasing motion built me up again and my walls came crashing down once I felt him deep inside me. I screamed his name, back arching off the bed, and he groaned grabbing my breast in his hand squeezing. I fell back gasping for breath and he leaned down and kissed my forehead. "I love you Bella, my Bella. He moved his lips back and forth over mine as I calmed. "Every breath that is in you lungs is a tiny little gift to me." And then the we kissed, slow and passionately, his hands cradled behind my head, my hands on his face. His cold body pressed against me, and he slowly, gently rocked his hips pulling my leg around his back.

His palms locked over my shoulders as our bodies swayed together slowly at first. Our lips cradled each others resting as our pace quickened. I pulled my other leg around him and we moaned into each others mouths at the same time as he went deeper. He put a little more force into his thrusts and I dug my fingers into his back pulling him into me. One of his hands rested on the small of my back pulling my hips up and with every thrust I felt him go deeper and deeper inside of me filling me. My heart swelled at our closeness and I was suddenly overcome with so much emotion tears started to fall from my eyes. I put my hands on his face pulling him away so I could look into his eyes.

"I… Love…you… so much…Edward." I said through labored breaths. "I love you to, Baby." He kissed me again hard sucking my bottom lip between his. He smiled into my lips when I moaned loudly after he made a swirling motion with his hips. "You like that hunh?" "Fuck yes!" He did it again plunging into me as his hips swirled.

"Ungh.. Edward that feels so good." He kissed the tears what welled in the corner of my eye and swirled his hips again. I was right on the edge and I could feel myself getting ready to cum again. "Edward… I'm so close… faster. I want it faster." He thrust into me faster, hanging his head in determination. I could feel his body start to stiffen and he was biting into his bottom lip. The sight of him so focused on bringing us to climax turned me on even more. My chest started to heave as that heat that I now lived for washed over me.

"Cum with me Bella, I can't hold on anymore." Again as if on command I came hard clinging to his body. "Oh my God!" I screamed probably a little too loudly. He screamed some obscenity as his own orgasm took over him but I couldn't hear it through the ringing in my head. I collapsed back against the bed, fighting to regain control of my lungs and Edward came down resting his head on my chest. He stroked my side feathering kisses across my chest until I was calm.

"You're amazing." We said at the same time staring into each others eyes and then laughed.

"You're always in my hair." He said gently kissing me on the lips. "As you're in mine." I answered back. "I sure am glad that you changed your mind about this."

"Yea… me too. I should listen to you more often." He rolled off me, pulling me out the bed. Let's go shower and get dressed before the family thinks we're a bunch of sex-addicted teenagers."

"Aren't we?" I asked him raising my eyebrow as he followed me into the bathroom.

"Yes… but isn't it the point of an addiction to hide it?"

"Very true." He followed me into the shower letting me adjust the water. He grabbed the sponge pouring soap on it and pulled my body close to his, kissing me, rubbing the sponge down my back.

"Who's insatiable now?" He chuckled and did my favorite smile making me almost jump on him. "Sorry, my recovery time is a lot faster than you'd expect. It's not my fault though. You turn me on. The vapor round your body glistens in the shower and I wanna stay right here and go down on you for an hour."

I blushed at his forwardness. I wasn't used to Edward talking like this. "As much as I would love that, I think you were right the first time and we should get down stairs. Simply being loved is more than enough. And there's always tonight." He smiled and kissed the top of my head. "Okay… I'm gonna hold you to that. "

We continued with our shower, washing each other in between kissing and laughing. I couldn't help thinking how I must have been the luckiest girl in the world to be able to love someone like him and have him love me back. Some part of me felt bad for Tanya. If she honestly had feelings for him than seeing us together must be hard for her. Even though she was a bitch on fire, I didn't want to flaunt our relationship in her face. No need to poke the evil angry bear with a stick right?

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**A/N So i hope you enjoyed that..... as always I ask that you review....its my encouragemnt to continue and lets me know you want to read more.... so please do**


	26. Sick Cycle Carousel

**A/N sorry about taking so long to update but I'm finishing up a summer class and things got a little hectic. Also i was kind of disappointed about the low number of reviews i got for the last chapter... this ones longer and has some pretty crazy parts in it so hopefully this one does better...as always i hope you enjoy!**

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**Sick Cycle Carousel**

**TPoV**

They had been at it again this afternoon and although Esme was blaring the TV, the sounds of their moans still drifted down the hall like they were meant for my ears only. To add insult to injury Emmett made a myriad of jokes and it was like I was never going to be able to get away from the mental picture of my immortal beloved wrapped in the arms of that filthy girl. The rat as I had so duly nicknamed her, seeing as though she looked and smelled like one, smiled at me and I felt like ripping her face off. Edward, reading my thoughts just pulled her closer to his side leading her towards the garage. That's right Edward, protect you precious little pet. I already got my hands on her once…it'll happen again.

"What did you say?!" Shit, I forgot to shield my thoughts from him. He growled, pulling his lips back over his teeth, his eyes on fire. God he was sexy when he was angry.

"What the fuck did you just say Tanya?"

"Edward, honey please calm down." The rat was pulling at his clenched fists.

"What did she do to you Bella?" he said to her, his voice and eyes completely softened when he looked at her and another wave of anger washed through me. How could he look at me so menacingly one second and then look at her that way in another? The little rat looked at me for a moment I knew the little bitch was about to give me away.

"What are you talking about Edward? Tanya didn't do anything to me." The rat was better than I thought. She was gonna hold that over my head. The second I ticked her off she'd run screaming to him, tell him what I did and I was not up for fighting with him. Not when I was so close to getting him back. He mumbled something under his breath about her being a bad liar and pulled her down the stairs.

**EPoV**

I was irritated that Bella would lie to me on Tanya's behalf but I understood why she did. Before we came down stairs she had asked me to be more sensitive to Tanya's feelings. It showed just how good Bella really was, that even though Tanya had been a total bitch to her from the second she walked through the door, she was still concerned about her feelings.

We arrived at the fair and met up with Ben and Angela as promised. The family separated, Carlisle and Esme going to join some of his co-workers, Alice took Irina and Kateto make fun of the mock fortune teller, Emmett and Jasper went off to play games and Rose and her butt-buddy lingered behind us. I grabbed Bella's hand as we walked with Angela and Ben towards the ticket booth. Tanya was screaming my name over and over in her head for my attention to the point where it was actually distracting me.

_Edward. Edddddward. Edddddward. Edward don't ignore me. Im talking to you, I know you can hear me. I just wanna talk for a minute…come on Edward. Edward look at me. Pay attention to me. Taaaalk to me. Taaaalk to me. Come on! Edward! _

"What?!" I turned around yelling in her face. "Um can I talk to you for a minute?" She was kicking her foot in the dirt with her hands behind her back trying to look all innocent, but clearly sticking her chest out trying to get me to look down her shirt.

"What do you want? Anything you have to say to me you can say it right here." I was in no mood to have her ruin my day that had started out so wonderful. Bella and I had spent the better part of this afternoon in each others arms laughing and enjoying being together.

"May I speak with you about something privately?" Bella smiled softly, letting go of my hand and walked away with Angela and Ben. Her spine was straight so I knew she was almost as irritated as I was but willing to indulge her. She could be too nice sometimes, I swear. "Come on Tanya, what ever it is can wait." Rose attempted to pull her arm but she didn't budge._ Sorry. I tired to talk her out of it._

"For the love of all that's holy, can't you leave me alone? Seriously, it's like you get more annoying by the second." "Please Edward; it'll only take a minute. I just um, want to apologize to you. That's all." "Now is not the time or the place for any such conversation. You can talk to me later."

"Please."

"Fine, make it quick."

**TPoV**

I counted in Portuguese as I led Edward away from the rat. I would get him far enough out of her sight and then make my move. He followed me without any further objection so I knew it would work. "That's far enough Tanya, say what you have to say."

"Edward, I really just wanted to say I'm sorry. For everything" "And this couldn't wait because?"

"Because on the way over here I thought about how things should be. The way things would have been if you hadn't left me. How I would be wearing your family crest like Alice and Rose. I guess I never really gave you a reason to love me, and I never let you know how I really felt about you because I knew you didn't feel the same." He narrowed his eyes at me and I thought of nothing but the words I was saying, sure he could read minds but you had to think of your lies before you said them right?

"Okay, fine. I forgive you. Can I go now?" He turned to walk away but I grabbed his hand. "Edward wait." "What Tanya? What more do you want?" We were out of sight from any witnesses so I moved fast without thinking so he wouldn't know what I was up to. I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my lips to his urgently. He gripped my waist and I knew I had him.

**EPoV**

I grabbed her waist with as much force as I could without crushing her bones and pushed her down into the ground. She landed with a thud cracking the concrete. "Are you out of your mind you psycho? What the hell is wrong with you?" She moved at me again but I stepped back before she could get her filthy hands on me. "Tanya stop!"

"No. I can't take anymore of this. How could you do this to me? How could you pick her over me? How could you do _that_ with her and not me?" Her eyes were pleading with me and she honestly looked in pain. For one millisecond I felt bad for her. What if Bella was right and she really did have feelings for me? I didn't like her but I certainly didn't want to hurt her.

"Tanya cant you just understand that I don't feel that way about you. I have nothing more than family respect for you. I'm in love with Bella. Please, just let me be."

"Edward what do I have to do to convince you that we should be together?"

"Tanya there isn't anything you can say. It's been 30 years since I left you, I think that's more than enough time for you to get over me. If it's not let me help you. This… us…" I motioned between us. "Its never gonna happen. I'm with Bella. And you're with… well everyone else."

"Edward that isn't fair. My heart has always been…"

"Tanya, close you mouth and try keeping it closed forever. I'm not listening to your lies anymore. Stop wasting my time and find something interesting to do with yourself."

**TPoV**

Edward all but sprinted away from me back to his precious little Bella. I hope he kills her. Rosalie walked up, looking in the opposite direction. "Edward looks pissed. Please tell me you didn't." I just rolled my eyes at her, she could be annoying sometimes. "What does it matter to you what I did?" We started walking and the whole time I could see she was craning her neck looking for Emmett.

"I do care. He's my brother and you're like my best friend. I barely ever get to see you and the whole time you've been here you've been sulking around about Edward for who knows what reason. Why do you even care?"

"Because, I want him back. Plain and simple. He's just being stubborn."

She looked at me incredulously started laughing. Was everyone trying to piss me off today? "Tanya, I don't get you. The whole time you and Edward were together you did nothing but cheat on him. Now of all sudden you want to be with him?"

"Yes. He had no business leaving me. I only took from elsewhere what he wouldn't give but should have. That whole thing was obviously bullshit anyway. Wouldn't you have done the same if Emmett had said that to you?"

"Actually no. I would have respected his wishes. I would have waited…because I _do_ love him. Maybe if you had done the same you would be my sister right now. He would have eventually come around."

Emmett came running up behind us picking Rose up kissing her on the cheek. "Come on Rosie, come "cheer me on" while I win you one of those giant pink monkeys." Her eyes lit up and she threw her arms around his neck and said in a baby voice "I want two… one for me and one for you." They kissed and it was sickening. I turned away only to see from the corner of my eye Edward stuffing pink cotton candy into the rat's mouth, smiling at her like she was the only girl in the world.

"Are you coming Tanya?" Emmett rolled his eyes trying to pull her away but I didn't feel like watching them grope all over each other anyway "No, you guys have fun. I'll catch up with you later." Rose hesitated for a few second the shrugged walking off with Emmett. Some friend she was. If Edward thought I needed to find something interesting to do with myself then I knew just thing. I hadn't gotten any since I got here and today was the day to change that. I'd pick one of these losers in this town and fill the Cullen house with the sounds of my love making. Edward would hear and no doubt see it all and be so jealous that he would probably rip the guy off me and finish the job himself.

**EPoV**

Bella was asleep, her head resting in my lap as we drove home. It had been a long day and she was much to my chagrin, worn out.

"Hmmmm this should be interesting" Alice mused as we pulled into the garage. I saw through Alice's mind that Tanya was bringing someone home with her… that they were pulling into our driveway and she was planning on having _him_ stay _here_… in my house.

Rose and Emmett pulled up next to us and just as I was pulling Bella from the car Emmett slammed Rose's car door startling her awake.

"You better tell her Rosie. She's your friend."

"Emmett what are you expecting me to say that isn't going to cause a fight?"

"I don't care what you say to her… just say something. I'm sick of everyone being all uncomfortable and having to walk around on egg shells around her. She hasn't even been here two weeks and we've already argued about her ten damn times…not to mention the fact that she keeps harassing Edward and Bella._ They_ are your family Rose… Not her. She's a two-faced bitch who is only after the family name and don't act like you don't know it" Emmett dashed into the house leaving Rose standing there rubbing her arm with the saddest look on her face that I had ever seen. I felt bad for her.

Rose turned and glared at us. "Some how it always comes back to you doesn't it? Ever since you moved here you've been the root of all the problems in this family. Honestly I wish both of you would just go away."

Bella bit her trembling bottom lip about to start crying. "Don't listen to her Love. Just ignore her. She's just angry." It was too late. Bella turned into my neck, tears soaking the collar of my shirt. I hugged her to me kissing her cheek trying to get her to turn her head but she wouldn't. "Are you happy Rose? You're no better than Tanya. You're unhappy so everyone else has to be as well."

"Edward… lets deal with one thing at a time." Alice pointed towards the headlights that were coming towards us. I lowered Bella to her feet and she clutched my waist looking over her shoulder at the approaching car. It slowed to a stop and Tanya stepped out of the passenger side. Mike Newton stepped out of the drivers.

"Hey, you guys just get here?" She grabbed his hand and pulled him stumbling behind her. He stared in my face shocked and afraid. I thought back to the night when I had pulled him off of Bella and felt like ripping his face off right where he stood.

"Whoa Tawny…. You didn't tell me you were staying with the Cullens." She smiled at him kissing his cheek. "Yup… and you're gonna stay with me tonight." Alice grabbed Bella pulling her behind me into the house as Jasper and I stepped in front of them, blocking them from moving any closer to the door.

"Abso-fucking-lutely not! Newton you have nerve even getting out of the car. Get the fuck out of here." _Jealous Edward?_

"Tanya take this piece of shit out of here or so help me God…" I was so angry I couldn't even think straight. Jasper was trying to calm me down. Newton's thoughts were centered on sneaking to find Bella in the middle of the night and finishing what he started.

"Oh Edward please. The world does not revolve around you and I don't have to do a damn thing you say. Now get the hell out of my way. I'm tired of your little games. One minute you don't want to have anything to do with me, the next you're jealous because you see me with someone else."

"You think Im jealous…I don't give a shit what or who you do." I answered back laughing. "You two are perfect for each other, both of you sordid excuses for people. That" I said pointing at Newton, "That is not coming in my house."

Mike stepped in front of her trying to be bold. "Don't talk to her like that Cullen. Who the hell do you." I held my hand up silencing him.

"Mike shut your fucking mouth before I knock your head off. I'm giving you two seconds to get back in your shitty little car and get the hell out of here." I stepped back right as he swung for me and grabbed his wrist throwing him face first into the dirt.

"Didn't you learn anything last time Newton. Don't challenge me. You will _not_ win."

Tanya bent down to help him up, staring at me with a cocky smile on her face. "You're nothing but a bully you know that. You want to control everyone around you." She brushed dirt from Mike hair, kissing his cheek, her eyes locked on mine trying to taunt me. _You're crazy with jealousy. I knew this would work. You can't bare the thought of me being with someone else can you?_

"Okay…that's it. I'm sick of you two fighting." Rose stepped up between Tanya and I her fists balled up. "Tanya, get this through your thick skull. EDWARD DOES NOT WANT YOU! Bringing this scum bag here is about the dumbest thing you could do. I don't care much for Bella, but anyone who could try to do what this piece of trash did deserves an ass kicking in my book. Get him out of here. Now!"

Mike pushed past Tanya jumping into Rose's face pulling back his hand like he was gonna hit her. I didn't even have time to react. Emmett came from out of nowhere and pulled Rose behind him, moving faster than he should have been. "You lay one finger on her Newton and I swear to the Lord I'll rip your FUCKING hands off!" Newton stumbled backwards more frightened than he had even been of me.

"You are all fucking crazy. Each and every last one of you weirdoes." He bent down picking up a large rock off the ground and held it up high over his head. "Any of you come near me and I'll smash you heads in." You could smell the fear emanating off of him, pungent like cat piss smell. The three of us couldn't keep from laughing. He was like a scared little boy holding that rock. "Mike just get out of here," Jasper said chuckling. "Do you honestly think you could take the three of us? Edward's right. You two are perfect for each other. Both psychotic and delusional."

Tanya stared back at the four of us focusing more on Rose and I. "Rose this has nothing to do with Bella. Why would you bring her into this? Why does she have to get in the way of everything?"

"You sure know how to pick them Tanya. This scumbag attacked Bella in the parking lot. He was gonna rape her. It didn't even have to be her. There's no way I'm letting you bring _that_ in this house. For obvious reasons you idiot. Sometimes you can be so dimwitted. Get him out of here. Now Tanya! I mean it."

"You couldn't pay me a million dollars to step foot in your house you whorebag" He grabbed Tanya's wrist but she jerked it away glaring at me. "I'm gonna leave with him Edward. I'm gonna get in his car and leave with him. I'm gonna get into his back seat and let him fuck me."

"Okay…. and you point would be what exactly?" I turned looking at my siblings who were staring at her just as bewildered as I was. "You guys think it's possible she may be deaf or something?" I turned back to her laughing. "Tanya just go… just…just get the hell out of my face. You're such a drama queen it's disgusting. I don't care what you do. I'm over this. I'm going inside." We all turned, walking back to the house. Tanya was still standing there calling me in her head.

_Aren't you gonna stop me Edward? I've giving you the chance this time. I won't leave with him if you don't want me to. I'll come to your bed tonight instead, tonight and every night hereafter. _

"Tanya, the only one I'll ever want in my bed is the one who is upstairs waiting for me. You've got nothing on Bella so for the love of all that's Holy, give it a rest already." I answered to her at regular volume knowing she could still hear me. I shook my head in disbelief. Maybe it was time to consider taking Bella out of here and staying in Seattle or something until Charlie came home.

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"Bella?" I walked into my room but she wasn't there. The shower was on so I walked into the bathroom but Bella was sitting at the vanity staring at herself in the mirror. "She really hates me doesn't she?" I moved up behind her and she leant her head back on my stomach taking my hands in hers. "I don't want to cause fights in your family Edward. What can I do? How can I get Rose to like me?"

It was breaking my heart to see my Bella this upset and especially because it was one of my family members making her this way. I leaned down kissing the top of her head. She smelled like heaven and hell all mixed together in one ambrosial scent. "Bella, I'm sorry she said that to you. She doesn't really hate you. She's just upset that her and Em are fighting and has a habit of pointing the finger. Its not even you… It's the psycho."

She closed her eyes and from the angle I was standing I could see right down her shirt. I watched the gentle rise and fall of her chest fighting the urge to touch her. I didn't want her to think that sex was the only thing on my mind now, but I couldn't help it. I wanted her all the time. "What happened with you and Tanya when you talked at the fair and what the hell is she doing with Mike Newton?" There was acid in her voice when she said his name and I knew she had not gotten over what he did.

"She was trying to "apologize to me" but she just ended up kissing me. And she with Newton because she's trying to make me jealous, but don't worry, he's not coming in this house." Her eyes were dark with anger in her reflection and I realized it was because _she just ended up kissing me_ came to casually out of my mouth.

"Bella honey please don't be mad at me. It lasted for all of a millisecond before I pushed her on the ground."

"I'm not mad at you Edward. I'm mad at her. I'm mad that I'm so helpless in this situation that I can't even really fight for you. Im defenseless against her. It would be like Mike trying to fight you. I just wanna hit her. I'm so angry and tired of her that I just really want to hit her. I can't believe I actually felt sorry for her that tramp" I couldn't help but laugh, she was so angry that her face had turned a delicious shade of red. I picked her up cradling her in my arms and pulled her clothes off of her.

"Bella honey, I'm sure Alice would love to do that for you. Go ahead and take your shower and calm down. I'll wait for you in bed." She kissed me once before I dropped her to her feet.

15 minutes later she was crawling into bed with me, a dark blue towel wrapped around her, her hair twisted into a messy bun at the top of her head exposing the creamy skin of her neck. "Edward." She said crawling onto my lap grabbing my chin roughly in her hands. "These" she kissed my lips roughly. "Are mine." She crushed her lips to mine again grabbing handfuls of my hair pulling my head back. She leaned up against me kissing me roughly and I could taste the anger in her kiss. It was ridiculously sexy. I grabbed her waist sliding my hands down to the backs of her thighs and then up underneath her towel. I clutched her perfectly round ass and we both groaned into each others mouths. She pulled her face away staring with a dark intensity into my eyes.

"Tell me."

"Tell you what Bella?" "Tell me that your lips are mine."

"My lips are yours Bella." She grabbed my face again kissing me hard and murmured into my mouth "Mine"

"Yours" I could already smell her wetness and let two of my fingers slip into her. She gasped and moaned into my mouth sending vibrations down my throat. Her lips latched on to my bottom one sucking hard as I pumped my fingers in and out of her. Her hands pulled at my hair as I quickened my pace. Her moans turned into gasping breaths as I stroked my hand along her side holding her waist to keep her steady on her knees.

My cock ached for her and I knew I needed to feel her cum on me. I took my hands away from her and she stared down at me with a frustrated angry look on her face. As if reading my mind she reached down putting her hands underneath mine and ripped my pants open. We stared into each others eyes as I wrapped and one arm around her waist and pulled my pants down with the other. She pulled my shirt open and ran her hand along the planes of my chest and along my shoulders down to my hands. She pulled them up around her back. I clutched the towel pulling it from her as our lips attacked each other violently.

I could feel her lips swelling beneath mine and tried to pull away but she pressed her sweet hot body against me roughly. She held the side of my neck with one hand and grabbed my cock with the other. I moaned and she brought me to her hot wet core slamming herself down on my lap. Her body shook on me as I felt her first orgasm clamp around me, but she rode it out, fighting with herself to move on my lap.

I cradled her head in my hands leaning her back and kissed down her neck. She rocked on me pulling her body to me and then pushing away and the feeling was amazing. The angle only increased her tightness and having her control me, use me to get herself off was the sexiest thing she had done yet.

Her head fell back as she moaned and panted, each sound egging me on. I moved my hands down to her waist and leaned back against the head board as she bounced on my lap. I was about to close my eyes and just revel in the feeling of her body when one of her hands traveled over the soft skin of her stomach up to the soft hills of her breast and she grabbed it pinching her nipple between her the sides of her thumb and index finger.

The sight of her touching herself pushed me closer and closer to my breaking point. I needed to feel Bella cum on my cock now. I let on of my hands fall between us and pinched her clit between my fingers.

Her head flew up; her eyes wide open as she stared at me. I pinched her again and again rhythmically as I took over our thrusting together.

Ughhhhh my ga… Fa….Jee… Ed…ward… Fuck, my god Edward." I pressed my thumb into her clit in a circular motion and she clutched my shoulders biting into her bottom lip. I could smell the tiny drop of blood as her teeth broke the skin and fought hard to ignore. I could feel smell the way her blood was heating and knew she was about to cum.

I pressed my lips to her hot skin and brought her hips down to mine hard on more time and her finger shot up into my hair.

"Gaaaaaaa Edward!" she screamed out as she clamped around me with so much force my own orgasm was instantaneous. Her pulsating walls milked me and our body shook and quivered together. I pulled my head away from her and slammed my it back against the head board as I eyed the bite mark my front teeth had left her chest. She leaned forward resting her head on my shoulders kissing my neck and stroking my face.

I felt like I had betrayed her when I saw what I did. I pulled her close to me but turned my face away unable to meet her gaze. She leaned up and pulled my face back to hers, kissing me tenderly. Her eyes hazy as she looked at me. "Baby, its okay. You didn't hurt me see." She held her hand over the place where I bit her. "It's okay Edward. Please don't be mad. You can control yourself with me. You and I both know that. This…this is okay… I liked it." She was trying to reassure me but it wasn't going to work. I hadn't even realized I was biting her.

"Remember what you said earlier, about listening to me more often. Listen to me now…don't be upset about this… you had enough control not to really bite me. Please don't beat yourself up about this…please." She kissed me again stroking my face and something inside me calmed.

"Okay Bella, I'm sorry." I slid down underneath the blankets with her on top of me. She laid her heard on my chest as I pulled the covers around her shoulders and using the remote to the thermostat, turned the heat up in the room.

"You know I wouldn't have been mad if you had of really bitten me."

"I know… I know Bella. Don't start this now. Just sleep love." I kissed the top her head and turned on the TV watching it with almost no sound as she drifted of to sleep.

**TPoV**

We rode back to the main road in silence. Mike was visibly shaken by the three Cullen boys towering over him and I started to second guess my plans. I did have some standards at least and this boy…was no where near up to par. However it was too late to turn back now. My plan was backfiring in my face and I needed to spin it quickly.

"So what the deal with you and Cullen anyway?" He looked at me…and I was trying to remember his name when I realized he asked me a question.

"What?"

"What's the deal with you and Cullen?"

"We're engaged. I was away…at boarding school and he started messing around with that rat girl."

"Hmmmm Bella…." Oh you can't be fucking serious. I reached over and grabbed his crotch in my hand and squeezed. He groaned his foot slamming on the break and I let myself fall against the dashboard for effect.

"Get in the backseat… ummm…."

"Mike." "Yea, right…whatever… get in the backseat Mike." I watched his scrawny little ass fumble out of the car and climb into the backseat. I rolled my eyes as I turned the heat all the way up and climbed between the seats into the back. He was sitting there with an eager grin on his face already down to his boxers. I rolled the windows down when I realized that his backseat reeked of liquor and vomit. I was regretting this more and more by the second.

"You ready for me baby. You're the finest piece of ass to come to this town since Bella moved here." He reached down and picked up a bottle of Jack Daniels and took a swig as he stared at me with this creepy grin on his face.

"You know it's not really a good idea to mention another girl when you already with one. Especially not one I hate. Say her name again and you'll pay." He looked back at me a little frightened at the icy tone of my voice but smiled and said her name again anyway. So I slapped him. Not hard…but hard enough.

"I love it when a girl puts up a good fight. Come here baby." He grabbed me and put his disgusting lips on mine. I felt his hot sluggish tongue trying to get in my mouth and pushed him away. "Look, don't kiss me again. Let's just get this over with okay." I grabbed his cock again whimpered with disappointment. Did he have to be tiny too? He pulled my shirt open and grabbed my breast and I realized he had no idea what he was doing. He was drunk and it was taking him to long to get hard. I leaned my head down into his lap and took it into my mouth only hoping to expedite this process but wanted to gag. He smelled awful and had a foul battery acid taste. A few more seconds I told myself as he pinched my nipples and groaned like a retard above my head.

He got hard… semi hard really and I wasted no more time. He was repulsive. I lifted my skirt and slammed down onto him. That would leave a bruise but I didn't care. He grabbed my breast in his hand squeezing and I bounced up and down on his lap a few time barely feeling anything.

"Oh baby you're pussy is amazing… it's the best… that's right … ride me you cock whore. You love big Mickey's hard cock in you don't you?"

Seriously? I needed to get this over with faster so I sped up slamming my hips into his and reached down grabbing his balls in my hand, internally cringing at how sweaty and hairy they were. He groaned and his breathing quickened and I knew the loser was about to blow his load so I hopped off and pointed. It landed in a nasty splat all over my chest. Mike fell back against the seat his chest heaving. I rubbed his jizz all over my chest and then pressed up against him so his scent would catch me. He tried to kiss me again but I held his head away and the climbed out of the backseat.

"Thanks Loser. By the way…that was the sorriest lay I've ever hard." I didn't even bother to look at him again before I jogged at and annoying human pace back up to the Cullen's long driveway out of his sight and the flew the rest of the way back to the house.

**EPoV**

Bella slept peacefully in my arms. I wanted to kick myself. Literally kick myself for what I had done. I'm losing control. I didn't even realize that I was biting her. It didn't help that she had so much trust and confidence in me. I guess I was a better liar than I had thought.

_Ewww what the hell is that smell?_

_Where is it coming from? There must be a dead animal in the house. Guys how many times do I have to tell you not to bring food home with you?_

_Carlisle no one's brought anything home…I don't think that's dead animal smell._

What the hell was going on down there? I rolled Bella off me gently, threw my boxers back on, and dashed down stairs. There was a nasty rotting smell permeating the house. No it wasn't rotting...I couldn't even pinpoint where it was coming from

"Maybe its Bella's food? Maybe something went bad in the fridge or the garbage or something." Esme went around the kitchen sniffing trying to locate the smell. Then it got worse when Tanya walked in to the room. We all covered our noses at the same time and stopped breathing.

"Emmett open the windows please." Esme said from behind her hand. Tanya sauntered up staring me in the face and I felt like I would vomit she reeked so badly. "Where the hell were you? Rolling around in horse shit?"

"I did it Edward. I told you I would and I did. Isn't it driving you crazy to smell him all over me?" She stepped closer to me and I wanted to die. "I'm covered in him… doesn't that just drive you crazy?" She had me trapped in the corner of the kitchen; I couldn't get away because I didn't want to touch her. I didn't want that smell on me.

"That's Mike Newton's scent on you. Oh man that's disgusting Tanya. You're making me sick. Get away from me." Right as I said that Emmett pulled the hose from the kitchen sink and sprayed her with it. Everyone busted out laughing as she shrieked and turned to glare at him but then he just sprayed her in the face.

"Tanya, you're gross you know that. You slept with that disgusting piece of shit and now you smell like shit."

"Emmett stop it!" Esme yelled. I couldn't help but notice that Esme "accidentally" sprayed Tanya one more time in the face as she took the hose from him. "Tanya honey, you really need to go shower… you're making everyone sick. I don't know where you were or what you did…and I don't want to know… You are really testing my patience young lady… now upstairs right now and take a shower."

"What I'm doing doesn't concern you. This is between me and Edward, so butt out!" Esme gasped and was about to tell her off when Alice Jumped across the counter and grabbed a handful of Tanya's hair.

"That's it! I'm sick of you you stupid heifer. Don't you ever talk to my mother like that again!" Kate snarled at her and crouched into an attack position as Alice jerked a screaming clawing Tanya around by her hair.

"Alice! Let her go Alice." Esme walked over and put her hand on Alice's shoulder. Alice growled once more and Tanya and pushed her full force towards Kate who stepped away because even she didn't want to touch her.

"Jasper take Alice to go calm down please. And you missy!" She said glaring at Tanya. "You have officially gotten on my last nerve. How dare you disrespect me like that in my own house after I'm doing you a favor and letting you stay here? If I hadn't of promised Carmen I would look after you I would kick you sorry butt out of here again. You have one more time to step out of line…one more incident I hear of you harassing my son and I promise you I will knock that stupid little blond head of yours off myself and I can't promise you'll get it back!"

"Whooooaaaa! Get her Mom!" Emmett said laughing. Esme shot him the death glare shutting him instantly. She walked out of the kitchen, Carlisle following behind her shaking his head laughing to himself._ She is going to want to screw for hours now. _We both looked at each other at the same time and I must have had a disgusted look on my face because Carlisle promptly apologized.

"This is getting out of hand Tanya. We had to leave Denali because your stupid boyfriend and stay in this shit hole town and now we're not even gonna be able to stay here until we can go back home. You're so selfish and inconsiderate it makes me sick. You really do smell by the way." Irina brushed past her and went into the living room. I felt bad for her. She wasn't anything like Tanya. I actually liked her. Emmett and Rose disappeared out the backdoor thinking that the smell was getting to them.

"Edward…Do you see what im going through for you. Cant you just give in?"

"Oh My God! Don't start this again please. How many times do you need to humiliate yourself? I'm not having this conversation with you again. Now I'm just going to ignore you." She tried to grab my hand as I went for the stairs but I growled at her and she backed off. Bella was still asleep when I got back upstairs and I was glad for her dulled human senses that she couldn't smell how bad Tanya stunk. I opened the doors in my room to let the fresh air in and sat on the couch so Bella wouldn't freeze. Something really needed to be done about Tanya but I had tried everything I could think of.

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**A/N So I hope you enjoyed this long chapter with its comedy and what not. Please please please review because I am not feeling the love anymore and need to know if i should bother to continue...**

**Thanks to my few faithfuls... if for nothing else i do this for you. Alot of drama has occured so I may do a short chapter or two of some lemon meranigue before things get really crazy again....**

**As i always ask please please please review. The next chapter is not written yet so the more reviews i get the more motivation i will have to write it... love me and I'll love you back.**


	27. Hear Me Out

**A/N Thanks again for all the love on the last chapter...So heres you update. My class is finally over so I'll be able to focus on writing more and getting you guys your fix.**

**And i just wana give a special thanks to My Beta, Tree Gracia...She helped map things out so much... Luv ya Pineapple!**

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**Hear me out**

**BPoV**

The sound of my phone ringing loud in my ear startled me awake. I instinctively reached for Edward who wasn't where he should be.

"Bella honey, your phone is ringing." He was lounging on his couch with his feet up reading Salem's Lot. It was actually sunny out and the light were dancing on his bare chest making him sparkle. God he's breathtaking…

"Bella, Love your phone." I shook my head and picked it up. I didn't recognize the number.

"Hello?"

"Oh God Bella you're okay. I've been trying to call you for days. Where have you been? Why haven't you called me back?"

"Who is this?" Edward peeked over the couch with a concerned look on his face.

"It's me… Jacob."

"Oh! Hi. How did you get my cell number?" Who is that? Edward mouthed at me.

"Charlie gave it to me. I told my dad I ran into you. Can I see you? Can you come down?"

"Um…I don't know. Let me see what I'm doing today. Can I give you a call back?"

Edward walked over to me staring at the phone but I held up my hand so he would give me a minute.

"Aw come one Bella. Come down to La Push please. I haven't seen you in forever. We have so much catching up to do." There was a nervous urgency in his voice that reminded me of how he had acted that night I saw him.

"I'll see Jake. I'll give you a call back in about an hour or so." "Okay… fine … but call me back okay."

We hung up as Edward sat on the edge of the bed taking my hand in his. "Who was that Bella?"

"My friend Jacob. He wants me to go down to La Push today." Edwards's eyes flickered angry for a second. If I didn't know his face so well I wouldn't have caught it.

"He's an old friend Edward. Nothing to worry about. He knows I'm with you. I told him."

"I'm not angry about that." I looked out the window and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. It would probably stay that way and as much as I loved spending time with him, the thought of catching some sun on a beach sounded appealing to me. I missed Phoenix sometimes.

"Maybe I should go down…just for a little while. You don't mind do you? I mean you can't come out today anyway."

Edward looked away for a second and back to me with an anxious expression. "I was gonna take you on a picnic today out by the creek. I thought it would be nice to spend sometime alone with you." He kissed my hand and his eyes were soft and pleading. I was melting like butter. "Okay… Okay Edward. I'll stay in with you today" He smiled and kissed my forehead and then I got up to shower. I let the hot water fall on my face and when the hazy feeling started to go away I couldn't help but feel I had just been swindled.

When I came downstairs Edward was leaning in the open doorway with a basket in his hand. He was wearing Khaki shorts that hung low on his hips and a black T-shirt was slung over his shoulder. My eyes followed the contours of his chest, across his broad shoulders and down to strong arms. No matter how many times I had seen him with no shirt on it still took my breath away.

"Ready Love? It's beautiful out." He reached for my hand and kissed me swiftly on the lips as we went outside. I was speechless as we walked. The sun was creeping through the trees casting shadows and sparkles all over him. He looked beautiful.

"So then Emmett started spraying her with the hose. It was really funny. I'm just glad you couldn't smell her. It was awful." I hadn't even realized he was talking to me I as so busy staring.

"Oh, yea that is funny. Ha Ha" He glanced down at me with his eyebrows raised. He knew I wasn't listening.

"You okay Bella?"

"Yea Edward….I'm fine."

We got to the clearing by the brook and he dropped the blankets and the basket on the ground then took my hands and faced me. "I'm being really insensitive aren't I? I'm sorry. I shouldn't keep you cooped up in the house today. Why don't we go back and you can call Angela or something?"

Here I was ogling him like an idiot and he was under the impression that I didn't want to be here. Silly vampire boyfriend. I wouldn't trade this for the world. "No. I wanna stay. I was just um… I was admiring you. I guess I was kind of lost in my thoughts." He smiled that sexy half smile and in seconds I was in the air. I wrapped my legs around his waist for my own security.

"Oh yea, you're thoughts about what?" He asked pressing his lips to the base of my neck. His kiss sent chills down my spine and I literally choked on my words.

"I…that… you're… oh hell Edward." He chuckled and lowered me to my feet.

"I love that I can do that to you, you know. I mean I know that sounds a little vain but I love that you get choked up when I kiss you." I smiled back at him and lightly nudged him in the butt as he bent over to lay out the blankets. We sat down indian style and Edward placed a turkey sandwich in my hand. I ate in silence watching him play catch with a shiny red apple. His graceful fingers would effortlessly uncurl and it would fly in the air and then land back in his hands as if it never left.

"Bella, I'm sorry things have been so hectic. I wasn't really expecting it to be this crazy.", he said leaning his head to my lap.

"What are you talking about Edward?"

"You know things here with Tanya. I started planning this before I knew she was coming. I guess it really was a bad idea to have you both here like everyone said but I didn't want to give up this time with you."

"Um, don't worry about. I'm fine. Sure it's a little frustrating. It seems like we don't get a moments peace unless she's not here but I wouldn't wanna be anywhere else." He placed a kiss on my knee and I ran my fingers through his hair. It was the little moments like this, when we were alone together that I realized how much I loved him. Edward rolled over onto his back and started up at the sky. The sun was right above us and he sparkled blindingly. I laid down next to him putting my head on his shoulder clutching his arm. In silence he stroked my face and my mind wandered back to our first real date. Laying here next to this same creek in the same spot. How he was quiet and thinking in his head. Then I remembered what he said and my stomach turned into knots.

"Bella, are you okay? You're heart is racing." He sat up looking down at me. I couldn't move from that spot because some irrational fear was plaguing my body.

"Bella are you okay? What's wrong? What's the matter?" Edward pulled me up into a sitting position searching my face with his eyes.

"I… I'm fine Edward. Are you?" He looked back at me incredulously visibly relaxing as my heart rate slowed.

"I'm fine now yea. What was that about? Why did you get so nervous all of a sudden?"

"I was just thinking… being here reminded me of something…I didn't like it."

Edward looked around for a second then down at the blanket.

"Oh. Oh Bella honey calm down please. I'm not going anywhere. I swear to you." He pulled me to his chest kissing the top of my head and stroking my back.

"Silly Bella, don't you know how much I love you? I could never leave you."

"I know…I just don't know why." Edward sighed and laid back down bringing his knees up. I rested my back against his legs and he took my hand and placed it on his stomach.

"Bella, you've changed me. When I first saw you, I had no idea things would turn out this way. I'm the happiest I've ever been in my existence now that I found you. I know it may sound a little selfish, but I don't want to let you go. I know you don't see yourself clearly, but for one second I wish you could see yourself through my eyes. You're beautiful inside and out. You…your life…It connects me to the world again. I don't see how you could love _me_ but im so very happy that you do. I promise to say by your….What? Why are you looking at me like that?"I must have had a look of bewilderment on my face. How could he not know?

"Are you sure I'm the one that doesn't see them selves clearly? How could you not know all the reasons why I'm in love with you Edward?"

"Because I'm a monster Bella, and the last time I checked, I'm not small, red, furry, and named Elmo so I don't see what there is to love." We both chuckled at his joke. I could see how being around Emmett has its effects on people.

"Edward", I said pulling his arm so he'd sit up. "You are no monster. You are the farthest thing from that. I don't know what you see when you look in the mirror but when I look at you I see an angel. You're the smartest, most gentle, loving person I know. If you were, I wouldn't be here right now and you have to know how deep my love is for you because well, I am _here_ and that roughly translates to I'd rather die than be without you. On second thought, I don't love you…that four letter word is thrown around way to much and in no way encompasses how I really feel about you."

Edward smiled and his amber eyes sparkled as the sun hit them. My breath caught in my throat as he slowly leaned in to kiss me. I could feel my heart quicken as our lips molded together. His kiss was sweet and my mind was in a serious fog by the time he pulled his lips away.

"I love you Bella, more than your human brain can comprehend. I just don't want to take anything from you. There's so much I wish I could give you that I can't and you deserve the world."

"Are you kidding me?" I replied once I could speak again. "Edward I didn't even know what living was until I met you. I've spent my whole life making other people happy, humoring my mothers ever whim…even moving to forks was for her benefit, but ever since I met you… I've actually wanted to be happy. I live for the light you bring to my life. I never worry when you're with me. It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real and I like the way that feels. It's as if you know me better than my self and I you. We're like two pieces of a whole. I believe in fate Edward. This was meant to be. Being with you feels as natural as breathing to me. I don't see how I could be without you now."

Edward grabbed my face and pulled me to his lips. His kiss was urgent and full of passion. I was instantly dizzy, fighting with myself to keep up with his pace. After a few minutes he pulled away leaving my gasping for air as he pulled my shirt over my head. He placed his hands firmly on my back and pulled his head to my chest. His lips brushed me gently, raising goose bumps all over my body but I held him to my anyway. I was on fire and freezing at the same time.

"Bella I'd give anything to be human for you. Anything in this world to be able to give you everything you deserve. Marriage…a family…even a walk on a sunny beach…I can't give you any of that."

"Edward none of that would mean anything to me if I couldn't share it with you. Just love me the way you have been. Love me and you'll always have my heart.

He pulled away and looked deep into my eyes. His eyes smoldered and it felt like he was penetrating my soul. The sun danced off him and the warmth from the sun made him smell even sweeter. I was completely drunk off him ready to black out when he pulled me to his body and whispered in my ear.

"You have stolen my heart Bella, it's only fair that I have yours as well." His voice was so low and smooth I felt myself getting wet before he even finished his sentence. I crawled into his lap wrapping my arms around his neck. His icy hands crept up my thighs underneath my skirt and he ripped my panties right off me.

"I love how you're always so ready for me." He whispered in my ear as he rolled me over onto my back pushing his pants down to his knees with one hand. His cock sprang out at full attention and I bit into my bottom lip almost cumming just from the thought of what was about to happen. I opened my legs anticipating him but he rolled over to my side and pulled my hand on to him. I grabbed his cock squeezing it as hard as I could watching as Edward squeeze his eyes shut pulling his lips into his mouth.

"I love the way your hands feel on me Bella." He leaned in close to my face letting his cool sweet breath wash over me. I strained to keep from blacking out as his fingertips crept up the now burning skin of my thigh to where I was aching for his touch . He slipped to fingers deep into me and I gasped, my back arching up off the ground as his thumb pressed into my clit.

"I love this even more… but im in no rush…Are you Bel_la?" As he said this his hands worked me fast bringing me so close to climax. I shook my head fiercely and he slowed down pressing his lips to my chest. My body betrayed me shivering as I clutched his hair pulling his face to mine. Our lips moved together in perfect synchronization as our hands moved at the same pace. Everything about today reminded me of our first date, but I didn't want it to have the same ending. I grabbed Edwards's waist trying to pull him onto of me.

He hovered over me for a second, looking into my eyes waiting for my silent okay. I pushed my hips towards his and we moaned at the same time as his cock slid into me, stretching me, filling me. I drew my knees up around him pressing my heels into the backs of his thighs pushing him deeper. His took my lips between his and pumped in and out of me rhythmically as I dug my fingernails into the cold skin of his back. His chest pressed against mine and his head fell back while he panted and moaned saying my name over and over. Edward in the sun in the throws of ecstasy was a glorious sight indeed. Through my own cries of passion and foggy consciousness I watched him as heat crept over my body. I started shaking and at first I thought it was from the cold but then his face lowered towards mine, his eyes smoldering and pressed his lips to mine whispering: Come for me Bella, and an orgasm ravaged my body, not once, not twice, but three times.

"Ohhhhhhhh Gaaaaaaaaaaddddddd" I screamed out. Edward crushed his lips to mine and moaned some obscenity and then I felt the only part of him that was warm spill into me.

I fell back against his hands that cradled my back and my head, my chest was heaving, and my heart was pounding so hard I thought it would burst out of my chest. Edward rolled off me running his cold hands from the base of my neck, down the middle of my breast, to my navel then back up cooling me.

"That…was…amazing…Edward." My hands and feet were trembling as he wiped my inner thighs with baby wipes. I would have done it myself but I hadn't gotten my land legs back yet.

"You're amazing Bella. I don't think I've ever cum so hard in my life." He smiled down at me pulling a bottle of water from the basket. I sat up taking it from him and downed half the bottle trying to quench my dry as a desert throat. It was quiet around us as Edward stroked my hand resting his cheek on my shoulder.

"I think your screaming scared the birds out of the trees babe, I cant here anything as far as the house." I chuckled, turning my face to his chest. My eyes were feeling heavier by the second and all I felt like doing was falling in to a sex coma.

"Are you just gonna roll over and sleep like a fat man every time Bella?" He said laughing as he laid back pulling me down with him.

"Probably. I can't help it. I'm not like you remember. My kind needs sleep to rejuvenate."

His fingers massaged my head as I slipped into a deep sleep.

When I woke I was back on Edwards's bed. The once sunny sky had turned and ugly beautiful gray and the rain was pouring. Edward wasn't in the room but I could hear his piano. He was playing Yiruma's "River Flows in You". It was one of his favorite songs to play and I pictured the way his fingers looked as they graced the keys. I thought about how silly it was of him to not know why I loved him or think that he was a monster as I shuffled still groggy towards the stairs. He's simply amazing. When I got to the staircase he stopped playing in the middle of the song and started play a different one. Our song. Which I had never heard on piano and it sounded beautiful. I walked down the stairs slowly, listening as he played The Smashing Pumpkins "Stand Inside you Love"

"You and Me….Meant to be… Immutable… Impossible…

It's destiny…Pure Lunacy…Incalculable…Insufferable…But for the last time…you're everything I want and ask for. You're all that I dream…who wouldn't be the one you love? Who wouldn't stand inside you love? Protected and the lover of…A Pure soul…and beautiful you…." He sang and I could feel tears welling in my eyes. His voice was beautiful. Every second I spent with him I found reasons to love him more.

"I thought you'd sleep the whole day away Bella. I missed you."

I smiled and sat next to him at his piano. He started the intro to chopsticks kissing me on my cheek and I joined him.

"Well you kind wore me out buddy, and the rain didn't help." I waited for him to respond and when he didn't I could tell something was awry. I low growl rumbled in his chest. I couldn't stop myself from getting turned on but then when his whole family piled into the living room I knew our perfect day was going to be ruined and that could only mean one thing…Tanya.

"Oh boy what is it now?" Edward said as we turned away from the piano. "Here I was having a good day." Edwards face twisted with irritation and my distaste for her deepened. Edward had been nothing but gorgeous smiles all day and now that was ruined. Tanya followed the family in, her eyes glued to the floor. We waited in silence as everyone sat down and the Carlisle was the first to speak.

"Calm down son, Tanya has something she would like to say to all of us. Hear her out before you get annoyed." I looked at him just in time to catch him rolling his eyes. Edward squeezed my hand laughing to himself.

"Edward, please… this is hard enough for me. Could you just listen." I cringed when she said his name. No matter how much I now detested her, I couldn't help but feel jealous. Her voice was almost as beautiful as she was and the thought of her kissing him…ever…made me sick to my stomach.

"Well go ahead. Say what you have to say." Tanya turned to face us and I could see she was visibly nervous. Some part of me started to feel sorry for her again. What ever she was about to say must have been serious to make a vampire nervous. Edward must not have been able to hear what this was about because he was staring at her with an annoyed expression on his face.

"Okay…so I know that I've been pretty horrible. I've caused a lot of unnecessary grief for you guys and I just wanted to say that I'm really very truly sorry. I can't even begin to explain how bad I feel. I've spent like the whole morning thinking everything over and I feel just terrible. Really I do. You guys are family and I've never done anything but take you for granted and disrespect you, especially you Esme, you've been a mother to me since well… you know. And Alice, I'm really sorry for how things are between us, I feel like we could have been friends but I understand why you hate me so much and I just hope that over time, we can fix things. I'd like to be close to you like I am with my sisters and Rose." Alice rolled her eyes but smiled a little bit.

"And Edward…I just don't even know what to say to you. I messed up big time I know that. I came here expecting something and was willing to do anything I could to get you back…but I see that you really do love Bella and well I'm going to respect that. I want you to be happy and if she makes you happy than so be it. I'll have to live with my feelings for you."

"And Bella, I'm so very sorry. I can see that you love Edward and his family almost as much as I do if not more. Thank you for being so kind and accepting of them. I can see that you are a really good person and all I ask is that you take care of him. I'm sorry for the way I treated you and I'm sorry for pushing you the other day. I could have really hurt you…I hope you can forgive me."

Before she even finished her sentence, Edward gripped the piano bench pulling a chunk out of it. "You what?!"

He flung the piece of the bench past her head and smashed into the wall behind her leaving a giant hole. Both Carlisle and Esme jumped up!

"Edward Anthony Cullen!"

"Rose did you know about this?" he barked at her. Emmett jumped up and I thought he was gonna get in Edwards face but he turned and growled at Rose. "Oh you're such a liar! I can't believe you!" Rose looked at him with pleading eyes and I felt terrible as I remembered her words from the other night.

"Okay okay stop it!" I yelled at them both. "I'm fine. She didn't hurt me. It's not Rose's fault. She isn't responsible for Tanya or anyone else and she defended me anyway so stop getting on her case. God!"

Everyone turned to look at me and I could feel my face turn beet red from embarrassment. It didn't matter how comfortable I was around them, I still hated being the center of attention.

"Yeah but Bella, Rose was supposed to be watching you."

"Edward, I'm not a child. I don't need a babysitter."

"Bella…"

"Stop it. Look what you did to the wall. She apologized. Get over it. God I just want to enjoy the rest of the time before my dad comes back so drop it okay. She said she was sorry." I turned to Tanya who looked shocked that I was defending her. "Tanya I accept your apology and as long as you don't start that crap back up again you're fine in my book."

I sat back down on the bench crossing my arms glancing at the sea of faces around me. I guess Jasper was using his talent because everyone in the room was now calm including me. Rose and I shared a quick and unexpected smile at each other as Emmett rubbed her hand. I studied Alice's face for a moment. I know I had just stood up for Tanya but something just didn't feel right. I then studied Edwards face. If something was wrong he would know and I would be able to see it but both of there expressions gave away nothing. Edward's eyes were fixed on Alice and I knew that they were having some silent conversation that I would bug both of them about but would never hear anything of.

"Okay, so everything fine now. Let's try and keep things that way alright. Edward, go down in to the basement, get some plaster, and fix my wall." Esme said smirking as she and Carlisle floated past us to the stairs. I never would have thought it but they spent and awful lot of time alone.

"Um, thanks Bella." Rose said leaning over me kissing my cheek. Emmett was standing at the bottom of the stairs tapping his foot like sonic the hedgehog. Edward looked at him and cringed.

"Jesus Em, Could you at least try not to be as explicit when you right in front of me?"

"Nope. Sorry Eddie… I like to plan ahead." He laughed and him and Rose disappeared up the stairs.

"Well Bella Love, wanna help me repair a whole in the wall?" Edward held out his hand for mine and I gave it to him happy that he wasn't mad at me for lying or for yelling at him. We passed Tanya on the way to the basement and she smiled sweetly at me. Maybe it was just my nerves making me cautious but when she smiled I got the feeling things would be okay now.

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**A/N As always i ask that you review...Let me know what you think or just say Hi**


	28. Blacking out the Friction

**A/N Okay guys heres another lemon meriangue update. Hope you enjoy it and please update, i was kinda sad that hardly anyone did for the last chapter but to those who did thanks so much.**

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**Blacking out the Friction**

**EPoV**

Things were quiet for the next few days. Thankfully. Bella had stayed at Angela's house while the whole family took a weekend hunting trip to Canada, but she was home when I got there. Listen to me. Like she wasn't gonna have to go back to her Dad's in a few didn't bother me on our hunt. She treated me the same way her sisters did and aside from the fact that she thought about the most ridiculous things the whole time, things were fine. When I got upstairs Bella was stretched out on my couch watching T.V. I dashed over to her, two whole days had me missing her terribly and human pace was far to slow.

"Geez, I didn't even hear you come in.", she said as I lifted her off the couch. Her heart was fluttering.

"I'm sorry Love. I didn't mean to startle you." I moved in to kiss her but I couldn't. My face wrinkled up in disgust and I immediately felt terrible when I saw the hurt in Bella's eyes.

"What Edward? What's wrong?" I moved in close sniffing her and the put her back on her feet. "Edward why are you sniffing me?"

"Where…Where you today?"

"I had breakfast with my friend Jacob. I felt really bad about blowing him off the other day and Angela had to go to church so…."

"You what!" I tried to control the anger in my voice as she shrank back against the couch.

"I didn't think you would mind. I was gonna tell you. I'm sorry…please don't be mad. Nothing happened. We just talked and had breakfast … I…We…"

"Wait. ...Bella. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound so angry. I'm not mad at you. It's okay really. I just don't want you going to La Push okay. I mean Alice can't see you there and if something was to happen to you I would have no way of knowing." I pulled her into my arms and she wrapped hers around my waist.

"I hate it when you leave for so long. I really missed you if its consolation," she said kissing my chest. "I missed you too Love and I would love to show you how much but, and please don't take this the wrong way, could you shower first?"

She pushed away from me grabbing a hand full of her hair pulling it to her face.

"What's the matter with you? I smell fine. I showered this morning and washed my hair. That's like the rudest thing you've ever said to me." She turned around and stomped toward my bedroom door.

"Bella love I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you but my sense of smell is a lot better than yours, and well you smell a little unpleasant. Did you hug him or something? Maybe that's what I smell?" Belled turned around leaning her back on the door.

"Yea I hugged him. He's my friend. Of course I did." The thought of Bella being in some unknown guys arms flashed through my head and a growl escaped me before I could reel it back in.

"Edward! Don't you growl at me! You're ex-fiancée kissed you and I let you get away with it. I highly doubt you have grounds to be upset over someone I used to eat dirt with!" A picture of Bella as a child eating handfuls of dirt popped into my head and I couldn't keep from laughing. "Well Bella that is one human experience I can honestly say you've one upped me on." She smiled walking back over to me crossing her arms.

"Well Mr. Cullen, if you're done with the scary vampire bit I believe you wanted me to take a shower and I think I might need some help." She grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the bathroom, her hips sashaying as she walked. My eyes zeroed in on her perfect ass and an instant hard on strained against my jeans. I would have to thank Alice for talking Bella into buying those pants.

"We need to hurry up though, Alice has some big plans for this week now that we're all getting along and that means shopping." Bella let out an audible groan that sounded a little more erotic than she may have meant it to. "You're gonna rush me?" She said facing me pushing her pants down to her ankles. My mouth watered as my eyes traveled over her sexy legs to the creamy skin of her thighs, resting on the tiny triangle of her lacy panties. I wanted to rip them off with my teeth. "Bella… You are such a tease."

"Who's teasing?" She ripped her shirt off flinging it at me. I dodged around it at vampire speed and caught the surprised look in her eyes as I lifted her up holding her against the glass wall of the shower.

"Edward!" She grabbed fist fulls of my hair as I sucked the skin of her neck. "Shhh Bella, remember I said we had to be quick." I put her back on her feet and she turned the water on as I shed my clothes with one hand and undid her bra with the other. I moved behind pressing my aching hard cock into her back and she groaned.

"On second thought, if this is what I can expect after you being gone…" I didn't let her finish, I turned her face sideways crushing her lips to mine damn near strangling her with my tongue. She took it like a champ though nearly matching the intensity of my kiss. The water came down over her head and the steam made her scent even stronger. I needed to take her now or I was gonna go nuts.

"Ughhhhh Edward." She whispered as I snaked my hand around her stomach letting my fingers unfold between her legs. Her sex was on fire and I wanted to taste her but I could hear Alice screaming in my head she was giving us ten minutes. Damn her! Bella arched her ass into my cock as I plunged two fingers into her and rubbing her clit with my thumb.

"Holy shit… Holy…Ugh… oh gawd Ed… ward." He exasperated moans egged me on and as she leaned her forehead against the wall I brought my lips to her neck kissing her and squeezing her perfect breast in my hand. I moaned into her neck when felt her squirming ass slide over my cock. Her tiny hands curled into fist and I could smell her blood warming to her climax point.

"Fuck Edward… I'm gonna cum." I put my lips up to her ear and pulled my hands away from her. "Don't you dare Bella, I wanna feel you cum on me." She pressed her face against the wall arching her back and I grabbed her hips sliding into her.

"Fuck Bella, you feel so damn good." The angle just increased her tightness around me and if it were possible I probably would have died of a heart attack right then. I pumped my throbbing cock into her and she went wild on me moaning and clawing at the tiles.

"Fuck…that feel so o good…my god Ed ward…. Ungh don't stop… god don't ever fucking stop." Bells dirty little mouth was turning me on ever more and slapped her ass lightly as I pumped into her. "Oh… yes… I've been bad… do that again." Christ she was gonna be the death of me. She started backing her ass into me meeting my thrusts making me go deeper and I knew I wasn't going to be able to hold out much longer. I leaned my knee under hers lifting her leg slightly and grabbed a hold of her slippery hips. My hands fit perfectly there like our bodies were made specifically to accommodate each other and as I thrust into her, her words became incoherent drabble.

"Cum with me Bella!" I commanded and her head fell back against my chest. She came hard, and the pressure around my cock was amazing. I cried out still clutching her waist but one whimper from her was enough. My hands shot off her and onto the wall crushing the tiles beneath my hands. The muscles in my stomach twisted into knots as animalistic urges plaguied my body. i growled loudy fighiting myself for control.

"Move Bella." She went stiff for a moment then ducked underneath my arms. In silence she pulled the hose down and stood on the bench letting the water fall over my face as I stood there statue stiff trying to control myself. A few minutes later her fingers were running through my hair and I grabbed her hand kissing her palm.

"I'm sorry I ruined that for you."

"Don't be baby. It can't always be easy." She smiled as I helped her down of the shower bench and handed her the shower sponge. I leaned down to kiss her and she arched up onto her toes meeting me half way clutching my biceps. "I love you Edward." She pecked my lips again and stepped back to wash herself. The sight of her soapy wet body was making me hard again. "I love you too Bella." I grabbed her in my arms kissing her again.

"Oh for the love of all that's holy! Alice what the hell?" Alice was standing outside the shower covering her eyes as if it really mattered. "Come on you guys! We have like so much to do today and very limited time! You guys can have you're play time when we get back just like everyone else. I swear you two are like rabbits."

"You should talk Alice. What were you doing before you came in here?" I already knew the answer to that but Alice's answer was classic and I knew the private/not so private joke would make Bella laugh.

"Jasper and I were _writing_ a story. So what!" Bella chuckled behind me and turned the water off. "Okay Alice okay, we're coming." Alice slipped two towels into the door and I snatched them from her.

"Unless you want a show a suggest you get out now!"

"Kiss my sass Edward", she laughed out. "Hurry it up okay!"

A short time later Bella and I walked downstairs to the garage where everyone was waiting for us.

"About damn time Edward. You know if you would watch a porno every once in a while you could learn a few tricks to get her Bella off faster." Bella's mouth almost hit the floor and walked pass Rose's BMW punching Emmett in the arm.

"Ow too hard Asswipe."

"Shad up Emmett." Everyone cracked up laughing as we got into the Volvo. Alice and Jasper were already in my backseat as I followed Rose out the garage. On the drive to Port Angeles we blasted Phoenix on the radio and Jasper and I sang 1901 while the girls squealed. I was actually having a good time now that things had calmed down. We pulled into the parking lot of the mall piling out of the car laughing as Rose Pulled up.

_99 bottles of beer on the wall…99 bottles of beer…You take one down and pass it around.._

I shot a side ways glance at Tanya as she got out of the car.

"Something wrong cousin?"

"I don't know. You tell me. Any particular reason you're singing that obnoxious song in your head." She shrugged her shoulders laughing. "I don't know, it a catchy tune. Watch. You'll be thinking about it for the rest of the day."

"Okay everyone," Alice chimed in, "Boys you know you have your assignments Ladies lets go. We have some major shopping to do."

Bella grabbed my hand as Alice tried to pull her away. "Edward, I don't want to go shopping."

"Come one Babe, just humor her please. I promise the day will be a lot easier if you just give in." I pulled a bank card from my wallet and slipped it into her back pocket giving her ass a firm squeeze. She shuddered pressing her body against me and I wrapped my arms around her waist. "You know I hate spending your money Edward," she whimpered in my ear. "Then don't think of it as mine. Think of it as ours. Besides that account is in you name so technically it's yours." She gasped and I kissed her before she could protest.

"If it makes you feel better you can get me something…practical… Like socks, you can never have too many pairs of socks ya know." She sighed looking up at me from under her lashes and I kissed the top of her head. "Have fun Bella, I'll see you soon."

"But you just got back. Cant I stay with you?"

"No because you need to buy a dress and I'm not supposed to know what it looks like until Thursday and besides it'll ruin the surprise I have for you. Go have fun with the girls okay. I take you to dinner tonight. Me and you? How does that sound?"

"Fine." She answered kicking a rock and pouting. I couldn't help myself, I grabbed her up in my arm and took that damnable little bottom lip between hers sucking on it gently and he molded her body to mine running her fingers into my hair.

"Ahem… do you guys mind not dry humping in the middle of the mall parking lot? People are starting to stare." I looked past Bella's head up at Kate who was glaring at us.

"Um, yea sorry." Em and Jasper were standing behind me laughing in there heads.

"Okay Eddie, Lets go before we have to break out the hose on you two."

"You think they're worse than you and Rose?"

"Ha, yea right. I'll battle these two any day." After quick kisses goodbye we all parted ways. Tanya was now down to 67 bottles of beer on the wall. Something just didn't feel right so I pulled Alice I aside.

"I know, I know. I'm keeping my eyes open. Don't worry about Bella. I'll keep her safe."

"What the hell is she up to?"

"I haven't the slightest idea. All I see is her being nice as pie and it's really annoying me."

"I don't trust her. You see anything else about that blond guy? You know the one with the ponytail."

"Nope only that one scene and I can't even really tell what's goin on there. But I'll keep looking; if anything changes you'll be the second to know. You know I'll be really happy when she gone."

"You and I both Allie. You and I both."

We both laughed and Alice flitted away joining the girls and I walked into Banana Republic to find my brothers.

"Hey man, don't feel bad, the tile in you bathroom is ugly anyway. Now you have an excuse to remodel." Jasper was combing through some white shirts looking for his size.

"How did you know about that?" "Alice saw it. Made me stand outside your bathroom incase you needed me." He looked at me from the corner of his eyes kind of smiling.

"Oh, I see, you do break down walls. Man you should really just go ahead and change Bella so we can compete. I've got those two lovebirds beat my like 20 pieces of furniture." Emmett said laughing slapping both of us on our backs.

"Emmett, that's the dumbest thing you've ever said."

Whatever Jasper, I still beat you." He grabbed a pair of pants of the rack and we walked over to the dressing room. Minutes later Emmett came out wearing the pants with his shirt rolled up.

"Guys do these pants make my ass look fat?" we were both rolling as he imitated a woman's voice. "Yea huge Emmett. What have you been eating? Bears?" I said doubling over from laughing. I noticed a few innocent bystanders growing increasingly uncomfortable and slowly walk away as we joked around in the changing room.

About and two hours later and 15 bags between us we got to stop by the jewelry store to pick up the gifts we had ordered for the girls. Surprisingly it was Emmett's idea to get them the initial necklaces with little martini glasses dangling off them. "If you but their first initials in the right order they spelled BAR", he said. Yea it was cheesy I know but so what. We met the girls in the food court where Bella was stuffing her face with horrible smelling Chinese food.

"Have fun you guys? Did you get everything you were supposed to get? " Alice questioned as we sat down. I nodded and she turned to Emmett. "Where are you shoes? I told you to get new shoes." Emmett rolled his eyes. "There's nothing wrong with the hundreds of pairs of shoes I have at home Alice, besides I got all you chick's gifts instead." Emmett handed each of the girls the Victoria's Secrets bags with the Pajama's that he had bought for them. It wasn't a big deal to us to buy each other gifts although the Denali girls seemed surprised especially Tanya.

"Thanks so much Emmett. That was very sweet of you." I sat quietly playing with a lock of Bella's hair reading each of their minds. They seemed to of all had a goodtime aside from Alice being the shopping Nazi and not letting anyone see Bella's dress for Thursday. Even Bella didn't know what it looked like apparently.

After lunch we all went to the movie house in Port Angles to watch Marie Antoinette and then Alice and Bella argued the whole way home about Alice's ideas for Bella's 18th birthday. The thought of Bella prancing around in one those lacy corsets with her hair pinned up had me re-thinking the idea of going out. Staying in sounded so much better to me.

"Have a good time kids?" Carlisle asked when we piled into the house. He and Esme were sitting at the kitchen table playing chess. Strip chess I found out, thankfully they had just started.

"Oh it was a lot of fun. We got you guy's presents!" Alice beamed hopping onto the counter. We hung out with them for awhile before Bella and I excused ourselves to change for dinner. Alice grabbed Bella flinging her over her shoulder.

"Alice put me down."

"Not a chance Bella. If I sit you down you'll just fight with me some more and waste time."

"Edward?" She reached out her hand pleading with me but I laughed and held my hands up. "You're at her mercy today babe sorry. Besides it wont be that bad and I like what she's thinking so don't fight with her okay."

"Oh, Alice let me help please?" Both me and Alice whipped our heads around at Tanya who flitted past me towards the stairs.

"Help with what?"

"Bella, can I like help with her hair or something. You know, bond with you guys. Girl time."

Bella peaked he head up over Alice's brightening the room with her smile. "Sure Tanya, come on up."

_Bella's a really sweet girl Edward. I'm glad you're happy. If only I could have what you have with Bella. It would be nice for us all to be one big happy family right?_ Tanya thought as she walked past me following Alice and Bella up the stairs. I went and changed and then waited for Bella in the car. 20 minutes later she slipped in kissing me on the cheek.

"Tanya's not so bad. I actually like my hair." Tanya had styled Bella's hair like Farrah Fawcett and I had to admit I like it to.

"She can be okay sometimes I guess."

"She did my makeup too." It was very natural and pretty not that Bella needed any make up to be pretty.

We had dinner at a little Italian restaurant in town. Thankfully Bella didnt notice me staring down her shirt the whole time. ALice had out her in a tight litlle balck tube top that pusehed her breast together giving her amazing cleavage and a tiny little red and black checker jacket. We talked about what we were gonna do for the rest of the summer and how Bella would have to go away for two weeks to Jacksonville to visit her mother.

"Why don't you just come with me? We could make up some crap about how you're allergic to the sun or something. It's kinda true in a way."

"I don't know Bella, we'll see. I generally avoid places like that because I don't want to take my chances. Besides, Em and Rose are leaving at the end of summer for a while and I promised I'd go with the guys for a little manaway. You know, do guy things like swim with sharks, wrestle bears and break rocks and stuff." Bella started laughing choking on her food?

"What?"

"Nothing, its just you guys are so funny. You're all like old enough to be my grandfather, but get you outside and you act like a bunch of kids. Even Carlisle."

"I'm sorry. I'll try to act more adult than. Isabella. Eat your vegetables." I forked a piece asparagus and put it to her lips. She opened her mouth and ate it, sliding her lips over the fork sensually. God I love those lips.

"Are you almost done? I'm um ready to get going."

"Sure get the check. I'm just gonna run to the little girls room real quick." A few moments later we were in the car headed home. Bella was shifting nervously in her seat playing with my hand. She looked embarrassed about something,

"What's on you mind love. You look really in it."

"Edward, how good of a driver would you say you were?"

Laughing I looked at her from the corner of my eyes. "Better than Mario Andretti."

"Who?"

"Never mind. Bella never mind. Why do you ask?"

"Well cuz I was wondering if you'd be able to drive while distracted." Her voice was low and sexy.

"Distracted how?." She growled…god that was sexy …and unhooked her seatbelt leaning to whisper in my ear.

"Distracted by me Edward." She cooed and her warm tongue ran along the canal of my ear sending shivers down my spine. I groaned loudly when he grabbed my crotch squeezing it.

"Oooh Edward….ready for me already?" She cocked her eyebrow smiling devilishly licking her lips.

"You know it Bella, anytime…anywhere… Now hop on lil mama." I pushed my seat back slowing down the car as she climbed onto my lap. She crushed her lips to mine as she reached between us releasing me from my pants. The smell of her arousal was filling the car so I rolled the windows down. As much as I loved her scent, my throat felt like I had shoved a branding iron down it. She pulled her panties aside rubbing my cock along her slit, and her warm wet juices covered me. I was getting antsy so I shifted beneath her to her opening but she bucked her hips back.

"Patience Edward. I'm controlling this. Not you." He eyes were dark and sexy.

"Bellaaaa," I whined and she grabbed my hair pulling my face back.

"Shut up and drive Edward." and then she impaled herself with me. My foot slid on the gas as be both moaned and Bella's quick orgasm tightened around me. She braced her hands on the seat and start rocking into my lap. The feeling was amazing, she was so warm and wet.

"Tell me you like it Edward. Tell me you like me riding you."

"Like it Bella… I love it."

"Say it."

"I love it Bella."

"No… say it dirty." She whined between her moans. I could feel that she was getting close to finishing and we were almost home.

"I love you riding my cock Bel_la." She crushed her lips to mine sucking my bottom lip between hers and moaned cumming all over my lap." The intensity caused me to cum a few seconds later and just in time as I halted to a stop right in front of my driveway entrance.

Bella collapsed against me her chest heaving as I stroked her back under her shirt.

"You are definitely something else my love. I kissed her cheek and she looked up at me with sleepy sex ridden eyes.

"Ditto Edward." By the time I pulled into the garage our clothes were fixed and Bella's eyes were half closed. I helped her out the car and she wrapped her arm around my waist leaning on me for support.

"Thanks for dinner Lovey, but im sooo tired. You won't be mad if I hit the sack now?"

"Not at all babe. I'll join you."

Alice winked at us as we walked through the kitchen.

"Night you guys."

"Night Alice." Minutes later Bella was snug in my arms asleep and I closed my eyes "sleeping" with her.

46 bottles of beer on the wall…46 bottles of beer….Damn she was right!

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**A/N Well guys i hoped you enjoyed reading that chapter as much as i enjoyed writing it. I tried to make it hot and humorous. Please Please Please review. I need them...they are like my crack...**

**As i said, the more reviews i get the faster the chapters go up and since im not in class i can get them up pretty fast... **

**Btw I jsut watched 2 amazing movies. Rob Pattinsons "How to Be" He was absolutely amazing in it. It was soooooo funny. I suggest you find it online or order it from the Uk like I did.**

**Also 500 Days of Summer, absoluetly hilarious and absoluetly amazing. If anyone has seen either of these let me know what you thought?**


	29. Rock Like a Party Star

**A/N So so so disappointed with the number of reviews i got for the last chapter compares to the amount of people who read it. However, thanks so much to my few constants... this was mostly posted for you. Hope you enjoy. **

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**Rock Like a Party Star**

**BPOV**

"Bella! You come out of this bathroom right now or I'm coming in to get you!"

"Forget it Alice! You're gonna have to rip the door off the hinges and drag me out kicking and screaming cuz there's no way I'm coming out on my own!"

"Alright Swan! You asked for it." I could hear the wood crack as Alice pulled the bathroom door of the hotel suite off and rushed in with a big grin on her face. I looked past her at the sea of blonds sitting on the bed and gulped. They all looked so beautiful. There was no way I was going anywhere with them.

"Bella what's that matter with you? You look amazing and Edwards gonna love your dress. Now let's go or we'll miss all the good music!"

"You call this a dress Alice? There's barely enough material to call this a dress!" Alice had picked out a cerulean blue dress that barely covered my ass, the sides were cut out, and it hung so low in the front I had to use double sided tape to keep my boobs from popping out.

"I look like a street whore!"

"No you look hot!" She smirked and rolled her eyes at me.

Tanya glided into the bathroom eyeing me over. "It really does look good Bella. I'd switch but I think that dress looks way better on you." After Tanya's apology she had been ridiculously nice to everyone. Since our first night here in Seattle, we had all been having so much fun. Last night all the girls had put on the pj's Em had bought for us and we all took turns playing pranks on the other hotel guest, taking pictures and acting crazy. Tanya and I had become something that passed for friendly although I could see in Edwards face that he was uncomfortable with the situation. She hadn't started any trouble so she was fine by me.

"Thanks, but Geez Alice cant I wear something else. I really don't feel comfortable in this. I mean come on, my ass is hanging out."

"You've got a great ass Bella! Why not show it a little while you still can? Now let's go!"

Alice pulled me from the bathroom towards the door. I stumbled in the 6 inch heels she made me wear but she held me up to keep my from falling on my face. We got to the club where the boys were waiting. I hadn't seen Edward all day and I couldn't wait to jump in his arms so he could hold me and protect me from his crazy sister.

"Bella really, you've got a great body. Don't be embarrassed to show it off a little. I bet you could have any other guy here you wanted." Tanya whispered in my ear as we walked up to the club's doorway.

"I already have the guy I want Tanya and I don't have to dress like this to get him to notice me." For the first time in a week she rolled her eyes at me and I felt bad. Maybe that was a little insensitive of me to say. We walked inside to the near pitch black club. Blaqk Audio's "Girls and Boys" was blaring on the speakers and the crowd seemed to part as we walked through. I could feel my cheeks flushing red as everyone stared. Alice led us to a roped off area and I peeked around her. The boys were all sitting at a table looking like Greek Gods.

Edwards eyes locked on mine and a delicious smile spread across his face. Jasper opened the rope pecking Alice on the lips. "Ladies Ladies Ladies, you all look amazing. Looks like we're gonna have to watch out for you tonight." He winked at me and I blushed. A cold hand snaked into my dress squeezing my waist. I looked up into Edwards's eyes just as he brought his lips to mine crushing me to his body.

**EPoV**

Alice is trying to kill. I'm sure of it. She had picked out a dress, if you could even call it that, which showed all of my favorite parts of Bella's body. I had an instant hard-on when she walked past Alice and was thankful it was dark she couldn't see it. I dashed over to her grabbing a hold of her waist. She lifted her head and I pulled her to me kissing her. She giggled when I pulled away.

"Edward is that champagne I taste on your lips?"

"Mmmhhhh maybe a little. Cant let that 300 dollar bottle go to waste." She stepped back pulling on my tie. "You look really hot you know." She blushed and the red tinge ran from her cheeks to her chest.

"Bella there are no words for how you look right now. I think my sister may have it out for me."

"I think she has it out for both of us." Alice stepped in between us grinning.

"No, I love you both dearly. Now go dance!" Jasper grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the dance floor. _I wonder if I'll be able to get her out of these shorts tonight. Bathroom maybe…no…Car…yea Car will work. We haven't christened Bee yet. _

Rose and Em disappeared onto the dance floor followed by Kate and Irina.

"So are you two gonna dance or just hold up the wall all night?" Tanya was sitting behind us twirling the champagne bottle on the table.

_I know you love to dance Edward, why don't you go dance with my sisters. I'll keep Bella company._

"No, we're gonna dance right love?" Bella looked up at me, her big doe eyes full of fear.

"Edward…I can't dance you know that, besides look at my shoes. I tripped at least 7 times just walking in here"

"Its all in the leading Love. I bet you're a great dancer. In fact I know you are." She looked up into my eyes then away bashfully. She was so incredibly adorable sometimes.

"Liquid courage Bella, it'll loosen you up a bit." Tanya handed her a full champagne glass. She put the glass to her lips and sipped it once before downing the whole thing.

"Wow, that's really good."

"Here, have another." Tanya re-filled her glass before I could stop her and Bella drank it down.

"Alright that's enough Love. You won't be able to dance if you're drunk." I stepped closer taking the glass from her. Our hands brushed each other and she felt noticeably warmer. "May have this dance my dear?" She slipped her hand into mine and leading me out onto the dance floor. She stumbled drunkenly and I wrapped my arm around her waist to keep her up, pressing against her.

"Promise you won't let me fall!"

"If you go down I'm going down with you. I'm not making any promises we'll make it back up though." I winked at her and she blushed again. Her cheeks were bright red and as I leaned down to kiss her, her scent assaulted my senses. Venom flooded my mouth before I could even think about it and I pulled my face away from her quickly. Her scent was stronger like a sledge hammer to my head. My mind started swimming, thoughts around me were blurring into one long unintelligible sentence. We walked over to my brothers and sisters as Metro Station's "Control" played and our bodies started swaying together. I could feel Bella round ass grinding into my painful erection. I wanted her so bad. Jasper bumped into my nodding to get my attention.

_Edward are you…hope I get laid tongh…these shoes hurt my…where the hells my…can I get your…May I buy you a…_

Bella's scent was rising in the air around us like a red fog. I couldn't think straight yet I had never felt so focused on her. We kept dancing as the songs played. Our bodies moved perfectly together just like when made love. Through the slight fog in my mind images of bella and I ran through my head and suddenly she was gone from my arms. Alice was in her place. Bella was with Jasper. The hazy feeling was gone and I could hear clearly again.

"Jasper couldn't take it anymore, sorry. Said he felt like you were gonna do her right here on the dance floor." We danced around each other in a circle. Rose and Tanya had made and Emmett sandwich and the thought of the three of them in bed together ran through his head quickly. He's such a guy.

"I think Bella's a lil drunk. Would you believe me if I said I was too?" Alice looked up at me laughing. "Then I guess those chains you guy got us have lil more significance now don't they? We laughed as I watched Jasper spin Bella from his arms into Emmett's and Tanya flitted over to him. Alice turned her back to me growling lowly. "I don't care how nice she's being…I still can't stand her."

_Edward I'm gonna take Bella to the bathroom. Is that okay?_ Irina was looking at me from over Bella's head. I looked to Alice who nodded at both of us. Even though Irina had never been anything but nice to me and Bella, I still didn't want to take any chances. Tanya was her sister after all.

"You gonna dance with my girl all night or can I have a turn?" Jasper came up pulling Alice to him. Alice grinded her hips into Japers waist. _"Hmmmm full attention I see."_

"You guys are grosser than Rose and Emmett you know. At least they don't try to hide it."

"Apparently neither do you." She nodded towards my lap. I couldn't keep thoughts of Bella in that dress from running through my head_._

Kate and Tanya came over dancing around me in a circle. Kate grabbed my hand and I twirled her, inconspicuously sending her in Emmett's direction. Tanya slid up in front of me when I turned around throwing her arms around neck. I grabbed her wrists behind my head pulling them apart.

"Oh come on _cousin._ Dance with me."

"Um, I don't think so Tanya. I'm not really in the mood to dance anymore." I fucking knew it. She was up to something. _Oh get over it Edward. I danced with everyone. I'm not __**after**__ you._

I twirled her away from me but she twisted herself back into my arms.

"One little dance with your cousin wont kill you." Her hips grinded into my cock and she smiled. _You know you like it._

"Okay that's enough. Get off me!" I barked at her. She stepped back and turned away but then backed up into me pulling my arms around her. Normally I would push her off but there were too many people around and she knew I wasn't gonna be rough with her in a room full of people.

"Oh come on Edward. You _want_ to _dance_ with me. You know you do. Bella can't move the way I do."

"No, you're right. She's better!" She swiveled her hips dropping to the ground and turning to face me. I stepped back but she grabbed my shirt pulling the length of her body against me.

"Alice get her!" I barked but it was Rose that appeared behind her in seconds yanking her by the arm. "Get off my brother Tanya. God! I knew it was too good to be true."

Tanya ripped her arm away from Rose and snarled at her. "I wasn't doing anything Rose. We were just dancing,"

"He doesn't want to dance with you." Rose stepped in between us crossing her arms.

"Some best friend you turned out to be Rose. You have like no faith in me." "Tanya you really don't give anyone a reason to have any faith in you when you jump on me the second Bella's out of sight. We were all getting along. Don't ruin it!"

**BPoV**

I couldn't believe my eyes when I came out the bathroom. Edward had his arms wrapped around Tanya waist. He was turned sideways so I couldn't really see his facial expression. I let out a sigh of relief once Rose pulled her away. Both of them stared her down and I knew Edward wasn't willingly dancing with her. Didn't excuse the fact that I was still pissed… and thirsty. I thought about going over to the bar to order a soda but realized I had no money on me and it was all the way on the other side of the club. I'd break my neck just trying to get there. I grabbed the champagne bottle off the table and drank some down. It felt cold and delicious but not nearly as good as it did when I tasted it on Edwards's sweet lips. A flush of heat ran through me and all I could think of was his icy body cooling me down.

I tried to push through the crowd back over to them when someone grabbed me.

"Hey baby, can I get a piece of that?" Some guy with hot liquor breath had grabbed me. I froze with shock thinking back to that night with Mike. I couldn't move.

"Um, no thanks" I stuttered out. I noticed my words were slurred and my vision was a little hazy. When I looked up at the guy he kind of looked like Mike. I freaked and ripped myself out of his arms stumbling backwards. The guy face contorted with impatience and he reached out to grab me. Just as he latched onto my waist arm, my back fell into strong familiar cold arms. My angel. Edward growled low, but loud enough that the guy's eyes widened in fear when he looked up at him.

"Hey do you mind buddy, me and this chick were about to head out of here."

"Kindly take you hands off my girlfriend before I break them.", he snarled. The guy let go of me and pushed away from us through the crowd.

"Are you alright Love? Did that guy hurt you?" I didn't know if it was just my alcohol dulled sense but Edward's words sounded slurred too. "No, I tripped over these damn shoes." He wrapped his arms around me and led me back towards the family. Just as we got over The Yeah Yeah Yeah's "Heads Will Roll" started playing. Alice jumped over grabbing my arm and pulling me into a circle of all the girls. Before I knew it we were all dancing again and I completely forgot about what just happened.

**EPOV**

Alice's new favorite song started to play so of course she went nuts pulling Bella away from me making her dance in a circle. The three of us stood in front of the girls guarding them from all the losers who would not doubt try to sneak up behind them. I couldn't keep my eyes off of Bella as she swayed her hips with music. Each time her waist twisted I caught a peek of her delicious curves. For once my thoughts were the exact same as my brothers. I shifted my legs trying to adjust my aching cock but it was no use. Bella turned around to face me twisting her hips as she moved down to the floor. My eyes were glued to the creamy skin of her breast that was peeking out the inside of her dress. Her eyes caught and held mine as she swiveled back up. They were dark and lustful. She knew I was staring at her and liked it. The unmistakable scent of her arousal permeated the air and I couldn't bare it any longer. I had to have her. This night had been tortuous enough without her taunting me with that come hither look. I shot my arms out grabbing her and she gasped as I pulled to me crushing my face to hers.

"I want you. Now!" I said a bit more roughly than I had meant to. She blushed a deep deep red and my mind went hazy again. She molded the length of her body against me and bit my jaw line. "Then take me out of here." I turned to Jasper holding out my hand who looked like he was ready to pounce on something. "Keys!" I barked at him.

"Sorry dude, occupied" He chuckled and then I turned to see what he was pouncing on. Alice was slightly bent over wagging her ass at him. It looked like a dance move but I knew what she was doing. He pressed up against her and they disappeared into the crowd. Rose and Emmett were already gone.

"Eddddwarrrddd." Bella moaned into my ear. One of her hips was hitched up to my waist like she was trying to get me to pick her up. Her scent was beating me in the face and it took every ounce of control I had not to ghost through the crowd with her. I pulled her behind me growling at the bouncer who was thinking how much he would like to stick his tongue in Bella's ass. He jumped back against the door letting me through.

I cursed myself for not taking my own car here. Where the hell was I going to take her? I turned my head to the left and saw it. The least perfect spot I could ever think of yet perfect at the same time. It was dark and no one would see us. Music blared from the club so no one would hear us either.

I pulled Bella into my arms dashing into the alley. I pressed her up against the building and she wrapped her legs around my waist pushing her pelvis towards me. Our lips pressed together passionately. My tongue explored every corner of her mouth as she grabbed a hold of my face pressing herself to me. I could feel her lips slightly swelling beneath mine. I snaked one arm around her through the back of her dress and pulled the front open exposing her breast. She pushed my face towards them and I kissed her bur sucking the skin on her breast.

"God I love the way you lips feel on me Edward. I'm so hot right now."

"You're damn right you are." We both laughed and attacked each others lips again as she leaned forward undoing my pants. Her heels scraped against my legs as she shimmed my pants down with her feet. I bent my knees a little, reaching under dress ripping her panties off.

"Ughhhhh fuck she whined as I ran my fingers along her silky wet slit before plunging them into her. Her back arched against the building and she grabbed the shoulders of my shirt pulling herself into my hand. I pressed lips to her chest against sucking her nipples and nipping her the sensitive skin of her breast. She coiled her fingers into my hair and pulled herself towards me. Our lips pressed together as I curled my fingers over her g-spot. She moaned loudly into my mouth as she came on my fingers.

Her chest was heaving as she lowered herself to my cock. Our eyes locked onto each others and she smiled sweetly kissing my softly on the lips. "I love you."

"I love you too Bella, only you…for the rest of eternity. You're the only one I'll ever love." She pushed hips down onto me and I smoothed her hair back thrusting upwards. Our lips met and we kissed soft and slowly as our bodies rocked together. Bella cooed and moaned softly, running her fingers through my hair pressing her cheek to mine. I kissed hers wrapping my arms around her gently pulling her to me. Her heart was fluttering and I swear mine would have been to. As it was I was already overwhelmed with emotion. It didn't seem to matter that we were in damp alley on the side of a club, or that I swear a rat just ran behind me, I was with Bella, My Bella. The woman I loved and who loved me back just as fiercely. I knew I would never feel like this about anyone else for as long as I existed and I wouldn't ever want to.

**TPoV**

Everyone disappeared in the blink of an eye, the horny idiots, but I wasn't about to lose my chance. Edward wanted me. I felt it when we had danced together and I was not about to let the last week go to waste. It was sickening playing nice to that fucking rat. God I hate her so much! _I already have guy I want…_Ha, not for long missy! I ghosted through the crowd. I hadn't seen which way he went but I could hear him talking. His words were slurred like _he_ was drunk. I poured all that rum in the champagne bottle for nothing. Getting her drunk hadn't disgusted him like I thought it would. He just got drunk off her scent. Why is he so backasswards?!

The air carried his scent from the alley. Maybe she was puking and he would get disgusted with her. I turned the corner and my eyes bulged out of my head like some had whacked me with a shovel. No….Oh My God No! Edwards strong pale legs stuck out with striking contrast from his black shirt as he supported the weight of the fat ass rat he called a girlfriend.

"I love you Bella, only you…for the rest of eternity. You're the only one I'll ever love." I watched his muscles tense ever ever so slightly as he raised his hips into her and wanted to vomit. I had to do something. I had to stop them.

No…no… no… It wasn't supposed to be like this. No Edward no. Stop!!!! You were supposed to see that I could be different and fall for me!!!!! No Stop! Stop! Jesus Stop!!!!! Stop you bastard. Turn around and look at me!!!!!!

He wasn't even listening. It was like I wasn't even standing there. I was screaming as loudly as I could in my head but he wasn't hearing me. "Ugh Bella… god… you feel so good… I love you…. I love you so much." His words burned me somewhere deep inside but I couldn't look away. I couldn't move. It was like watching a car accident. I willed myself to run over and rip them apart but it was like some unseen force was suppressing my senses.

It shouldn't look that way. They were in an alley for Christ sakes. A dirty damp alley and they were not fucking, not even having sex, but **making love** against the side of the fucking club. He was gently caressing her and she him, staring into each others eyes moving into each other with precision, so focused on each other that didn't notice me standing there. It was so clear to me in that moment I could have been scrying with stone. He's never going to leave her. I can see it. He's in love with her. She's in love with him. He'll marry her. He'll change her. I'll never have him. I'll never have my place in his family or get the Cullen name.

Something audibly snapped in my head. It sounded like trees breaking.

Yes! Why didn't I think of this before? There's really only one way to get him back. She has to be out of the picture.

I have to get rid of her.

And I knew just how. I whipped my phone out of my purse and pressed the speed dial button. It rang twice before he answered.

"Tanya! Didn't think I'd hear from you for a while. I didn't cause to much trouble for you up in Denali did I now."

"Not too much, but enough that I had to leave town for a while."

"Oh, and where are you now?"

"Forks, Washington. I was thinking you should come."

"Hmmmm… I don't know…She's been a little crazy since I got back. You'd have to make with worth my while."

"Oh it will be....."

"How? Might I ask?"

"Well my dear… How would you like to play a little a game?"

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**A/N So alot of you guessed Tanya was up to something.... Bet you didnt see that one coming now did ya?**

**If you would like to see what happens next i suggest you leave me some reviews seeing as thought i wont post another chapter unless i get atleast.....12 for this one one... that sounds reasonable..... It would be greatly apprectiated and it will infact get the next chapter up faster. Lots of things are about to happen and my beta and I are the only one's who know....if you would like to be let in on the secret fun... indulge me.... and I'll surely assuage your feelings of curiosity and anticipation!!!!**

**Thanks to all that have been reading by the way. **


	30. Summer Shudder

**A/N 11 is a good as 12 so heres the next chapter.**

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**Summer Shudder**

**BPoV**

I woke up the next morning with a suuuch a headache. When I opened my eyes, my head was hanging off the bed over a trash can.

"Ughhhhh I feel like crap!" Chills ran up my spine when I felt Edwards's icy chest press against my back and his cold breath blew over my neck.

"That's what happens when you get into grandpa's medicine cabinet Love", he breathed into my ear wrapping his arms around me."

"I don't really remember much of last night? How much did I drink?"

"Enough to get _me_ drunk", he laughed. I looked up confused into Edward's smiling face. "For the benefit of both of us, could you lay off the sauce? At least while I'm around." He chuckled sitting me up and pulling the sheets around my naked body as Alice walked in the door. She had a worried look on her face as she poured a glass of water and came to sit on the edge of the bed. She handed it to me with a bottle of aspirin looking intently at Edward. His face turned down into a somber expression.

"What you guys? What aren't you telling me?"

"Tanya saw us last night in the alley. She left this morning."

"Oh, wow. But she…Didn't she say she was past all this?" Alice's eyes darkened when she looked at me. . "We think she was playing us Bella. All I could see was her being nice and she didn't think about it around Edward so he doesn't know either. She's….she's very good."

"Oh man. I feel so terrible. The alley is the only thing I really remember. It was very um…intense. If she saw that and left…God it must have broke her heart."

Edward whipped his head around so fast his face was a blur. "Don't worry about her for another second. That witch has no heart. She has no regard for anyone but herself, least of all you." His tone was bitter and he gripped the sheets turning away from me.

"Edward, don't be upset. Really, this is my fault."

"Alice don't blame this on yourself. I should have known she was standing there. I should have used better judgment when I realized that I couldn't hear right with Bella being close to me while she was drunk."

"I should seen that would happen Edward. We're both dropping the ball here. Let's just be more careful from now on." They stared at each other for a minute having another one of their private conversations. There was a knock on the door which Edward answered and returned seconds later with black coffee and a bagel.

"What about Kate and Irina? Are they still here? Do they know anything? Should we even be worried?" I asked, taking the food, my eyes darting between the two of them. Edward stood in front of the window and Alice sat beside me statue still gazing past him absentmindedly stroking my fingers. I knew this position all to well. She was searching for answers and he was watching them with her. A few minutes later Alice shook her head coming out of it and ghosted to the door. "Meet us down stairs in an hour. I'll get everyone ready to go."

"What did she see Edward?" I asked scrambling to the edge of the bed pulling his hand. "Nothing Bella, just get dressed. We're going home now."

"Edward, don't do that to me please. You're scaring me. Don't keep things from me. What did Alice see?" I tried to sound hard but my voice cracked. They had no idea how their silence could make a person feel anxious. Edward's eyes softened and he picked me up in his arms wrapping the sheet around me. He kissed me softly on the forehead and then on my cheek, then my lips.

"I'm sorry Bella. I didn't mean to scare you. Alice really didn't see anything. Tanya's still in town somewhere but she keeps thinking of other places to go. Alice and I think it would be best if we just left town. Get you back home…send you to Jacksonville early maybe. I don't want you to worry. I doubt she'll try anything. She knows Alice will rip her head off in a second assuming I don't get to her first."

"You'd hurt her if she did something to me?" Edward stared back at me incredulously.

"Are you kidding me Bella? I'd destroy anyone who hurt you or even attempted to. I wouldn't even think twice about it. You're life is too precious to me." He laughed a dark eerie laugh and put me on my feet. I don't really know what my face looked like but his turned up in confusion, then disgust, then sadness.

"I just scared you a little bit didn't I?"

"Um…no… I guess I'm not used to hearing you talk that way. It's different. So….Vampire." He smiled that sexy half smile his and smoothed my hair down.

"I'm sorry Bella", he kissed my forehead, "I just love you so much. I don't want anything to ever happen to you. Especially something that I can avoid."

An hour later we met up with everyone in the parking lot. Kate and Irina were there, but they decided to ride back to forks with us for their stuff and go back to Denali early. I slept in the car on the way back wrapped in Edwards's arms, partly from the fact that my head was still pounding and the rest because Japer was sending so many calming waves throughout the car, he could have put down an elephant. When we got back I was glad to be home. Carlisle and Esme were snuggled on the couch waiting for us. We all settled in the living room while Kate and Irina packed their things. Alice and Edward returned to their watching positions both sitting on opposite sides of me. Every once in a while Alice would twist up her face and sigh in frustration and Edward would dart his eyes from her to me then back to his hands in my lap.

"Ugh this is so annoying! I'm not getting anything at all!" Alice jumped off the couch throwing her hands up in the air.

"Hun did it ever occur to you that maybe there isn't anything to see. I mean maybe she just got the point and is just gonna go home or something. There's really no reason to think the worse right?" Jasper pulled her back to the couch and I could feel the calming waves he was sending out again.

"Maybe Jasper is right Alice…Edward. No use in getting worked up over nothing." Carlisle said flipping through the channels on the TV. He settled on the House marathon on U.S.A."

"Grrrrr….maybe you're right. Maybe we are just being paranoid. By the way you guys should probably think about hitting a furniture store. Charlie's gonna be back early." Her eyes darted towards Edward and me, cracking a smile. "Or you could let me take you Bella, shopping always clears my mind ya know." She raised an eyebrow at me and I could just see it now. An all day shopping trip that included a new wardrobe to go with my new bedroom furniture. I looked up at Edward with hopeful eyes and tugged on his sleeve.

"That won't be necessary Alice. Besides, as I've been informed, my bathroom tile is rather unsightly and needs replacing, so we'll take care of it. But thanks for offering."

"You know Edward… if you're gonna replace the tile, you might as well remodel your whole bathroom, I could draw up some blueprints. You're bedroom too! That could definitely use some work."

"Hey! I like my bedroom the way it is thank you very much." He laughed and tossed a pillow at her which she promptly caught and tossed back at me. Edward smacked it out of the way and it ended up going to Esme. She caught it tossing it like a Frisbee at Jaspers who tossed it to Carlisle. His eyes were glued to the TV but his hand shot up and he grabbed it and stuck it behind his head. Everyone was laughing and the air in the room felt a hell of a lot better than when we walked in. Kate and Irina came down a few minutes later to say their goodbyes.. Irina apologized again for Tanya's behavior and gave everyone a hug and kiss. Kate did not hug me. She scowled at me and Edward mumbling something about this being our fault. A few minutes later they were gone and I felt like a strange chapter of my life had just closed. I had this foreboding feeling that I would never see them again.

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A new sense of calm blanketed me as I sat at the vanity in Edwards's bathroom brushing my hair. He was standing behind smiling pulling on the pants of his pewter gray suit eyeing the charm of the necklace he had given me that so conveniently rested between my breasts. Shivers ran up my spine as I watched him lick his lips as he pulled up the zipper.

"You know if you don't stop looking at me like that we're never going to get out of here."

"I can't help it. You're so beautiful Bella. It's like staring at the sun all day." I blushed, quickly looking down into my lap. Again I thought what a difference a day had made in our relationship. Now that _she_ was gone it felt like a weight had been lifted off of us. We were back to just being us. Death Cab for Cutie played from the bedroom as we got dressed for the hospital charity dinner. Occasionally Edward would come to my side and kiss my hand or my shoulder, eyes smoldering.

"I have some plans for you tonight my love. You're gonna be leaving me in a few days…I'm gonna miss you like crazy." He pressed his lips to mine gently, pulling the zipper up on my black dress.

Edward drove the Aston Martin to the dinner and I felt like a movie star. I had never been to anything so fancy. My eyes bulged from my head when he dropped the keys into the valets hand and then led me, following the rest of and I needlessly say beautifully dressed family to our table. The scene was beautiful. Tables with lush gold and cream cloths surrounded a polished dance floor. White lights were strung everywhere and they looked like twinkling stars against the cloudy night sky.

"Nice isn't it." Alice said flitting to my side in a tight fitting amber colored cocktail dress. It matched her eyes perfectly. "Yes, very. I can't believe Forks Hospital is able to pull something like this off."

"The hospital gets a lot of anonymous donations." She winked at me and motioned to Carlisle and Esme who were dressed for the red carpet. The night seemed to carry on effortlessly. All these hospital officials kept coming over talking to us, asking about my father and how his vacation was going, whether Edward was planning on going into medicine like Carlisle. No one seemed in the least bit surprised to see me with the Cullens as they had done before.

Edward pulled me onto the dance floor as some waltzy song started to play. I blushed thinking back to the club in Seattle and how erotic our dancing had been. Rose and Emmett were gracefully gliding across the floor circling around the rest of the Cullen family and I could see in Edwards face that he was eager to join them.

"Its okay if you wanna go dance with Rose or something. I'm sorry that I'm not as talented as the rest of them." He smiled softly and held me closer.

"I'm happy right where I am Bella. Besides I'm not that much of a show off." He kissed the top of my head as we childishly rocked side to side which is all I could manage in the shoes I was wearing. As if to negate what he had just said he fancily twirled me and in that instant three things happened simultaneously. Thunder and lightening cracked loudly sounding like a canon on a battlefield, my eyes locked onto Alice who was standing motionless clutching Jaspers arms in the middle of the dance floor, and Edward froze crushing me to his body obviously seeing whatever Alice was seeing in her head.

"What the fuck is she doing?" he growled whipping his head around looking at Alice. Panic had ridden me motionless as my eyes darted back and forth between the two of them. Edward pulled me into a far corner with Alice Jasper and Emmett following behind. I had never saw Alice look so angry.

"How the hell did she know where to find us?" she hissed through her teeth. Right then I knew who she was talking about. I clutched Edwards's hand, my eyes surveying the room around me. Carlisle was standing with Esme and Rose near the door, their eyes shifting nervously around the room.

"So what if Tanya's here. She isn't going to start trouble in a room full of people guys. Why is everyone so nervous?" I choked out.

"She's not alone Bella." Edward barked at me. "She's brought someone with her. One of us."

Edward clutched my hand and we tried to act like we were casually having a conversation when Tanya glided through the crowd. She was dressed for the occasion in a long silver gown, the guy trailing behind her. I blinked once in disbelief. He was strikingly beautiful from a distance. His alabaster skin was glowing in the all black suit he was wearing. His blond hair pulled back into a neat ponytail. When they got closer I froze with fear. He sauntered up with the gait of a cobra ready to strike but it was his eyes that had me trembling with fear. They were not the honey-colored vampire eyes I had grown so accustomed to. Or even the black eyes I had seen when Edward was at the worst of his thirst. They were darker…blacker…his irises outlined with a bloody red color. They came and stood in front of us and Tanya had a look on her face so smug I was surprised canary feathers weren't hanging from her lips.

"What are you doing? Why did you bring him here?" Edward hissed through his teeth. The guys eyes didn't leave my face for one second. His head was cocked to the side like he was listening to something.

"Oh I didn't mean to crash the party Edward. I had no idea my sisters had left until I was already here." He narrowed his eyes at her and she laughed bringing her fingers up to her lips. "Why so serious Edward? Does it bother you that much to see me with someone who can actually rival you?" A low growl rumbled in his chest that snapped me out of my trance. I clutched Edwards's arm that he held protectively in front of me trying to stay one my feet.

"This is James by the way. He came to escort me to the party. Wasn't that nice of him?"

James eyes flickered up to Edward momentarily then back to my face. He leaned forward a little and I swear almost peed on myself. Edward quickly stepped in front of me a growling a warning.

"Do you always play with your food?" James taunted still staring me in the eyes. His voice did not match his appearance. It was smooth like Edwards. Emmett and Jasper stepped up his side at the same time that Alice pulled me behind her.

"Hmmmm so defensive…and for what? A little human girl. She hardly seems worth it unless of course you that territorial over your meal. I must admit she has quite an appetizing aroma." I peered over Alice's shoulder at the mocking smile on his face. He was big. Bigger than Edward. A shudder of fear ran through me as I thought back to Edward words in the hotel room. I did not want Edward to fight him.

"If you value your existence at all then you will turn around right now and leave James. Take her with you." Edward snarled at him. My knees felt like jelly and my heart was racing. I felt like I was going to pass out.

"Oh, is that supposed to be a threat? I'm so scared." James replied in a mocking voice. I could see Edward tense up, his graceful fingers curling into claws. I nearly jumped out of my skin when Esme appeared at my side grabbing me around the shoulders.

'Is there a problem here?" Carlisle asked in his doctor voice trying to assess the situation. We were making a scene, I could feel it.

"No…no problem at all Carlisle." Tanya answered playfully. "I was just introducing everyone to my friend here, and Edward is overreacting as usual." She tossed her hair over her shoulder smiling. Carlisle looked at Edward and then at Alice nodding. "Why don't you kids get going? We're just about to rap things up here."

Without another word Edward ripped me from Esmes arms walking towards the doors. My feet weren't even touching the ground. He didn't bother with the valet; instead he ghosted with me in his arms to the car wordlessly strapping me in. My body was shaking with fear when Edward got into the drivers seat.

As soon as the door was closed he let out a frightening snarl and banged his hands on the steering wheel. Emmett climbed into the backseat so quietly I screamed when he shut the door.

"Christ Bella, it's just me. Calm down!"

"Are you crazy Emmett? Clear your throat or something next time! God!" I yelled back turning around to face him. He had a big smile on his face instantly calming me. "So what the plan man… I know something's going down, I can see it in your face."

"He's a tracker Em." Edward sighed out.

"Oh shit." I had no idea what they were talking about but from the way Emmett slumped back against the seat then turned to stare out the back window I knew it wasn't anything good.

"A tracker… I don't understand… what does that mean Edward? What's happening?" His eyes flickered to me for a moment then back to the road as he pulled me closer to his side. "Don't worry Bella, don't even worry about it. I'm going to get you out of here. I'm going to get you out of here and then I'm going to come back and finish this before anything can even start."

"What are you talking about Edward? Stop talking in circles. Tell me what's going on. Am I in some kind of danger here? Is that guy going to come after us?"

"I'm sorry Bella. I'm so sorry. James is a tracker… his gift is finding people…the hunt…killing them…it's his obsession. The more dangerous the kill the better for him and the fact that you are protected by a coven of vampires just made this the opportunity of a life time. He's not going to stop coming after you until one of you is dead." Something that felt like a sob caught in my throat but when I opened my mouth nothing came out. My hands were gripping Edwards's jacket so tightly that my knuckles had turned white.

"Don't start freaking out Bells. There are 7 of us and on 2 of them. We might as well take that crazy bitch out too!" Emmett started laughing in the backseat so hard it shook the whole car. A smile crept across Edwards face leading me to believe he was enjoying the thought of killing Tanya now. "Edward you aren't really going to fight that guy are you?" We pulled into the garage and Edward turned around to face me taking my face in his hands. "Bella sweetheart, don't worry. I'll take care of this guy. I won't let him near you. He won't touch a single hair on your head." He pressed his lips to mine pulling me closer to him by my waist. Tears streaked down my face as I clutched his wrists trying to pull him away.

"Edward no. Please. Did you see the size of him? If he hurts you, I don't know what I'd do. We have to think of something else. We'll just leave. We'll just leave and go somewhere where he won't find us. I don't care if we have to run for the rest of our lives."

"Bella honey don't be silly. What's Charlie gonna think when he comes home and finds out that we left town. He'll probably call the F.B.I. or something to find you, do you really want to have to run from them to?"

"You guys could be the modern day Bonnie and Clyde, rob banks and stuff… would be kind of funny" Emmett said still smiling from the backseat

"Shut up Emmett. We're not going anywhere but upstairs to pack a bag for you, Bella, and then we're going to Jacksonville. Tonight."

"What… no… Edward what if he follows me there? Then my mom and Phil will be in danger then too!"

"She's got a point Ed. You won't know if he's on the ground following you if you're in a plane."

"We'll drive then."

"Yea and what's to stop him from ramming into your car on the highway or something. How are you gonna explain coming out of that accident?"

Edward gripped the steering wheel and growled. "Then what do you suppose I do Emmett? Bella can't stay here forever. He knows enough not to come to the house, but what happens when I have to take her home. He'll just go to Charlie's and they'll both be in danger."

"That's a good plan actually. Take her to Charlie's. He'll follow her scent straight there. Jasper and I will take the long way, meet you and we can take him down."

"That'll work Edward. I can see it.", Alice said silently slipping into the car. "I'll take down Tanya for you. It would be the best gift you could give me, letting me rip her head off for this."

My mind was whirling as I listened to them. My loving peaceful vampires where now plotting to "take down" two other vampires intent on killing me. I wanted to believe that this was all just coincidence but my gut told me it wasnt.

"Edward…Tanya bring him here because she knew what would happen…that he'd come after me...didn't she?"

Edward linked his fingers with mine and ran kissed me softly before looking into my eyes.

"Yes Bella, I'm sorry. He's the reason that she had to leave Denali in the first place. He's bloody thirsty and not always so smart about it. She knows how he works, that he won't ever stop no matter how long it takes. His being here could cause more trouble than I can even begin to explain to you."

"Yea, Lord knows we don't need the dogs sniffing around here." Emmett said as his, Edward's, and Alice's eyes stared out the back window towards the woods behind us.

"We have to kill him Bella, I'm sorry." Edward murmured stroking my face.

"But he's what if you get hurt Edward...I'd die if something happened to you. What if something happens to Emmett of Jasper."

"Bella, please dont worry about me. I doubt I'll even need them. Nothing is going to happen to you...or Charlie...or anyone else for that matter." The confidence that he spoke with eased my worries a liltte. I had to believe him. I had to believe that Emmett and Jasper would be there...that nothing would have to my heart...

"How… how do you even kill a vampire? I mean you guys are so solid." I finally asked.

"We'll have to rip him apart and burn all the pieces." Emmett boomed from the backseat.

Anger coursed through me as I thought of what was about to happen. My life was in danger and it was all because of that crazy jealous bitch. I never wished death on another human being but then again…she wasn't exactly human was she?

I turned to Alice with the hatred burning on my lips. "Alice, when you ready to burn her….I want to light the match."

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**A/N Ooooooh so a fights comin.... I'm thinking rain... shirtless Edward.... okay im getting ahead of myself here. **

**Rewiew if you like. I'm working on the next chapters and it should be up soon. **


	31. One of those Nights

**A/N So heres another chapter for ya to enjoy. Thanks to all the new people to alerted my story and as always a thank you to my faithfuls. We're getting deeper here but its no where near done... I want you all to keep that in mind. **

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**One of those Nights**

**EPoV**

Figure it would be my Bella to be the one to startle me after so many years of being exceptionally aware. The thud on the floor behind me made me momentarily cringe then whip my head around, fearful the tracker had actually gotten around me. My sight and nerves settled when I found Bella sitting bewildered on the floor next to her bed, and then I stifled my laughter to keep from embarrassing her at falling out of the bed.

"Edward…what the… when did we….How did I get back home?" She asked rubbing her ass as she stood up. I dashed across the room quickly replacing her hands with mine. "I'm sorry Bella" I chuckled into the top of her head. "I should have woken you on the way over here but you looked peaceful I didn't bother."

"Well I'm blaming you for my broken ass bone."

"Do you want me to kiss it and make it feel better?"

Her cheeks flushed red and her gaze dropped to her hands on my chest. "Hmmm… that might help…but first may I have a little human moment.?" She pushed away from me running…and tripping…towards the bathroom. I returned to my post at the window listening to the rushing of the tap water…. the bristle of the toothbrush against her teeth…the rustle of the wind in the trees…the thud of footsteps in the dead leaves on the ground. One heavy set of footsteps and the thoughts of that sadistic jerk-off outside…_I wont back down….I will not bow…I've come to bring you hell…._Cocky bastard. He was out there taunting me running semi circles around the back of Bella's house. The sound of the shower turning off and the soft padding of Bella's foot steps in the hall pulled me out of my focus. Her scent had wafted into the room, the heat from the water warming her. She was in my arms before I even decided to move.

"He's out there isn't he?" she croaked out as I laid her on the bed attaching my lips to her neck. "That's why you keep staring out the window?" Her body shuddered when I nodded my head. It's from my cold I told myself but I could still smell the faint hints of her fear.

"Why didn't we just leave Edward? What if my Dad comes back before this is over? What if someone else in town gets hurt?" I pulled back looking into her eyes as her bottom lip trembled wanting to kick my own ass for putting her through this.

"Bella, Love, please don't worry. This will be over before the day is done. I have to wait for him to come close enough that he won't have time to react when I approach… He'll just run if he knows im coming for him. They are both dumber than a pile of dirt if you ask me. Tanya's got him somehow convinced that we wont come after him because Carlisle is so non violent…idiots." Bella smiled back at me wrapping her arms around my neck.

"I hope Carlisle isn't too upset."

"He agrees with me Bella. He's seen more of this type than any of us have, having been part of the Volturi and all. He knows what needs to be done."

"Its just seems a little silly to sit here and wait for something bad to happen. Why don't you guys just go out there together and get him already?"

"I already told you Bella, if he senses that we're coming after him…he'll just run. It'll never end because as soon as we give up he'll just come back. I don't want to risk him coming back when im not around. It needs to be more of a surprise attack." I didn't want to let on that I was secretly hoping for some other force to take him down out there. I didn't want to leave Bella for even a second because I didn't want to run the risk of him even marginally getting past me.

The thud of he James' feet was gone in the next second, his thoughts gone. My phone rang in the next instant and I grabbed it from the nightstand holding tight to Bella's waist so she wouldn't fall off the bed again.

"He's moving Edward…He's going into town to hunt. Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle just left to run interference…we need to get this over with." Alice buzzed on the other end. I kept my poker face on for Bella's sake. She didn't need to know the fears she just voiced to me were now reality.

"Okay Alice. Thank you for letting me know. Keep me posted." I said back to her fast enough that Bella wouldn't understand.

"Alice says to tell you hello." I turned to Bella smoothing down her hair and kissing her. She relaxed in my arms and her towel started to slip. I could feel the heat emanating from her through my shirt. Her kiss deepened as she leaned into me and I laid back on her bed pulling her over me.

"We haven't been back in here since that night, "she breathed into my neck. "God I wish that freak wasn't out there. I sooo want to relive it." Her actions were screaming over her words as her hands slid up my shirt and she grazed her lips across my chest. My own hands were pulling that dinky little yellow towel from between us.

"You and this towel… If must be your favorite or something."

"Mmmmhhhhh yea it is now… that's the towel I was wearing that first night we were together. You remember?" I laughed even though I know I shouldn't have. Bella attempted to dig her fingers into my flesh to tickle me but on meeting its resistance she sighed and gave up.

"Stupid marble vampire skin" she mumbled laughing. I watched her attempt to hold the towel around her as she walked into her closest but she wasn't doing a good job. The bottom of her perfect ass stuck out and a groaned wanting to touch her. She was so sexy even when she wasn't trying. She returned wearing old grey sweatpants and a pink cotton t-shirt and I had to admit as much as liked seeing Bella all dressed up I loved it when she was in her sweats. She looked more comfortable.

"I thought Alice got rid of all your old clothes…how in the world did you manage to hide those from her?" She came back to the bed motioning for me to put my head in her lap. I obliged, closing my eyes and reveling in the feeling of her fingers running through my hair and her scent encircling me.

"I move them around a lot," she answered smirking. As if almost on cue Bella's phone buzzed and she flipped it open revealing Alice's text message:

_Enjoy that little get up now cuz after I'm done with Tanya…I'm torching those too!_

We both laughed and from the angle that I was I watched Bella's breast bounce behind the cotton of her shirt. Her laughing ceased when she realized I was staring and she covered my eyes with her hand slipping from underneath me. I felt her lie at my side and bring my hand underneath the hem of her shirt. She gasped still managing to keep my eyes covered when my hand cupped her breast. "It was a custom in ancient war times for soldiers to bed their wives before going off to battle. I know Im not your wife but I think I would suffice…don't you?" With that her lips latched onto mine fiercely and her body quivered as I wrapped my arms around her pulling her over me. Again , my cold, I told myself was the source of her shaking but it wasn't until I felt Bella's warm tears falling onto my face that I realized it was from something else. I gently pushed her up and she turned her face away not meeting my eyes.

"Bella, what's the matter Love? Why are you crying?" I pleaded with her feeling pained and broken on the inside. Not being able to read her mind really killed me sometimes. She whipped her head around, the tears making her eyes glisten and she threw herself at me.

"Oh God Edward…I'm… I'm scared okay. I'm scared…for you and for Jasper and Emmett…I mean what if he has some unnatural strength or something and he hurts one of you. God if anything should happen to you I would gladly throw myself at him to keep him from finishing you off. Please…please can't we just run…run away from here…or I don't know anything…change me or something so you won't have to worry. Please…Just please don't let him hurt you." She cried hard into my neck and I pulled her into my lap gently rocking her.

"Shhh Bella Shhh….everything is going to be okay. He isn't going to hurt me. I promise you. Nothing will happen to me or Em or Jazz or you for that matter. Everything will be fine. Emmett Jasper and Carlisle are out right now patrolling Forks to make sure no one else gets hurt either. Please calm down my love. You have no idea how it feels for me to see you this upset. I am going to take care of this and you. Please don't be afraid. Trust me please." Her sobbing quieted as I stroked her back. I lay back against her newly replaced headboard and hummed our song as her breathing returned to normal. She laid against me quietly fingering the collar of my shirt.

"I just love you so much Edward. The thought of something happening to you…having to live without you…It hurts so badly. I'd rather you just hand me over to him than for you to get hurt. For any of you to get hurt."

"Bella if anything were to happen to you I would probably drop dead and spontaneously combust…please don't even talk about it. You keep forgetting one thing though. I can read minds remember. I'll know what he's planning to do before he even does it." My gaze drifted out the window as I pondered that thought. I had not realized that he had decided to go into town to hunt while I was kissing Bella. I shook the thought out of my head. Not the time for doubts and questions…not the time for insecurities… besides she will see it on my face and I'd have to hold her down to keep her from running to the car trying to leave town.

The sound of Bella stomach rumbling reminded me of her need to eat and as we walked down the stairs to the kitchen my mind wandered back to the many nights I had spent sneaking into her window to watch her sleep before that fateful night that had pushed us together and then to the closeness that we now shared. I silently watched her make herself breakfast as she playfully danced around the kitchen to the Silversun Pickups thinking things over in my head. When she sat at the table opposite me, sunlight crept through the clouds engulfing her in light through the window. She smiled a heartbreakingly beautiful smile and I was once again reminded how lucky I was that she loved me.

God I would give anything to see that smile for the rest of my days.

"Edward are you okay? You haven't said anything for like that past half hour. What's on you mind. I'm sorry for my outburst earlier if that's what's bothering you. I'm over it now okay…I know you'll be okay. Emmett and Jasper will be okay. Everything will be okay." She moved to my side of the table crawling into my lap. Something came over me and I couldn't hold back anymore. A feeling of a fear I had never known in all of my existence came of over me…running through me from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. My arm swept across the table and I threw Bella down on it a bit more roughly than I had meant. My hands clutched her tightly as if she would float away if I didn't hold her down. She stared back up at me holding my face her eyes wide with surprise and concern.

"Edward what is it? What's the matter?" she asked me frantically searching my face. My mouth filled with venom as anger burned deep inside my chest. I brought my lips to her throat and she leaned her head back allowing me better access.

I kissed her neck and my body shook against her as my eyes started to burn. "Please Bella…just please don't ever let anything happen to you," I murmured into her skin. "Please don't get into a car accident or like break your neck falling down stairs or get sick or something. Please…God I love just love you so so so so much." As I said this I planted kisses all over her neck and chest and face. She brought her knees up pulling me to her and held my head to her chest. The sound of her heartbeat calmed me as she now shushed me running her fingers through my hair. I chuckled into her chest looking up into her eyes,

"Now look who needs to apologize for the hysterics. You know anyone watching us would think we were completely out of our minds." I pulled her up eyeing her spoiled breakfast that was now a cascade of colorful mess on the kitchen floor. "Sorry about your breakfast. I'll make you something else."

"Don't bother. I'll just have cereal." I cleaned up the mess as she ate a very healthy breakfast of lucky charms and peanut butter cups.

The hours passed quietly by as we lay sprawled out on her couch switching between watching TV and reading. Bella lay sleeping her head in my lap for most of the day. Alice texted me frequently keeping me in the loop. Her visions of the fight kept changing between today and tomorrow but one thing was always certain. Tanya was no where around. This fact bothered me. She was a stupid woman yes…but smart at the same time. She had some ulterior plan that this James possibly didn't even know of. I turned off the televisions and picked up Ticket to Ride. As Bella had read Wuthering Heights so many times she could recite the passages verbatim, I had read this one probably more. I focused on listening to the outside and Bella's breathing from my lap.

Rain falling in sheets to the ground…the click of streetlights turning….Bella's soft breathing…a car turning a corner to quickly…no crash thank god….Bella's soft exhale as she clutched the blankets…wind in the trees...the buzz of the neighbors thoughts…Bella's breathing quickening as she shifted in the stages of sleep. I ran my fingers through her hair and she calmed instantly. We were so right and wrong for each other at the same time. Somehow we were a balance for each other. Two parts of the same whole but a whole that shouldn't exist but had to none the less. My mind kept reeling back to that picture in Alice's head that she repeatedly played for me over and over. The picture of Bella in the kitchen doorway looking at a ring on her left hand. My mothers ring. What I wouldn't give to actually live that memory but I knew what that entailed. I swallowed back the bitter taste in my mouth that I now recognized as my "anger" venom.

Rain continued to pour…Bella stirred coming out of her sleep. I looked down at her waiting anxiously for her to open those beautiful brown eyes and smile at me. A tear rolled down her cheek and she rolled over burying her face in pillow against my stomach. A sob was muffled by the pillows as she kicked underneath the blankets clutching that back of the couch.

"No Edward…no…please….oh god…" I realized she was having a nightmare and gently shook her awake. She popped her head up blinking, quickly looking around the room. Her eyes finally settled around my face and she sighed with relief.

"You were having a nightmare Bella. Are you okay?" She moved into my lap resting her head on my shoulder. "Yes, I'm okay now. Now that I can hold you and have you hold me. God that was an awful dream…just awful."

"Do you want to talk about it? Maybe that will make you feel better?" She sighed again and with it I heard a change in the wind. Bella buried her face in my neck turning in my lap to face me. I held the small of her back listening to her breathe me in and feeling her body slowly relax.

"No just hold me Edward. Hold me and never let me go. I'm trying to be strong and brave for you but I feel like you're slipping through my fingers. I can't get over this overwhelming feeling that we're about to be torn apart."

"I'm never letting you go Bella. Nothing and no one will come between us. My outburst earlier…I was thinking the same thing. I was thinking about something bad happening to you and taking you from me forever. As long as you want me Bella…I'll be here for you… to protect you…and even if you tell me to go…I'll lurk in the shadows hoping you change your mind." I cradled that back of her head breathing in the sweet scent of hair as she dragged her lips across my cheek to my lips.

Her kiss started sweet and innocent but turned quickly. She ground her hips into me moaning as my lips trailed down to her neck. We had been fighting this need all day knowing it was more important to be on alert but I heard nothing dangerous outside…the last from Alice was that Emmett and Jasper had covertly steered James a ways north of us and he wouldn't start his way back to us until tomorrow…I would probably be able to take care of everything while Bella was asleep.

Bella sighed as I laid her on her back running my hands along her side. Today had been an oddly emotional day for both of us and as she wrapped her arms around me I felt relief. If ever there was any doubt…my love she leans into me. Our love for each other was so strong that I knew we would always do right by each other. Bella trusted me completely with her life and I trusted her with mine. Our live were so intricately webbed together.

I stared down at her smiling knowing I had found the greatest love of the 21st century.

She smiled back. There was no need for words right now…only our need for each other. Bella's soft hands slid up my back pulling my shirt over my head. She gasped as I snaked my hand into her sweatpants. My mind wandered a bit to the convenience of her elastic waistband and then my erection grew stronger, pressing into her, as I realized she was going commando. The heat from her core was coming out in waves. My cell rang on the coffee table. "mOBSENCE"….Emmett could wait. Bella's panting and moaning as my fingers swept across her wet slit had my attention. She arched herself begging with her body for penetration and I slid two fingers into her stifling back my own moans as her hands wrapped around my painfully hard cock.

"No Edward…please…let me hear you. Let me hear you like it," she sighed out and I moaned into the warmth of her neck as she expertly stroked me. My phone rang again. "Welcome Home"…Jasper would have to wait as well. I kissed Bella deep and hard rubbing her clit with my thumb. I was so close to losing it. She needed to cum so I could bury myself inside her, become one entangled body with her on this couch and show her my need and love. Bella's breathing became more labored and her blood started to boil. She was right on the edge. I curled my fingers over her spot and move my hand side to side quickly with my thumb pressed into her clit. She choked on air, her legs tensing up and her walls clamping down on my fingers inside her.

"Ugh…..gaaaaaaaaaaaad Edward." Karen O's voice screaming from my phone dragged my from the bliss I was in at hearing Bella belt out my name. "Heads will Roll" played and I quickly snatched up the phone.

"What is it Alice?"

"Edward, WHAT THE HELL?! Now is sooo not the time for that. The tracker. Jasper and Emmett lost him. They tried to call you. He's…." It was too late. The brick crashed through the front window leaving me just enough time to push my weight against the couch knocking Bella and I both to the floor.

"Edward what the hell was that?" Bella clutch my neck her heart racing.

"Hmmmm I was so hoping to find you in a precarious position. You make things to easy for me Edward. Way to easy. And then you send your family like that after me. As if that would stop me. Silly little boy." James laughed darkly from the window sill. I stood up bringing Bella behind my back and crouched defensively in front of her. _Maybe after I off you I can finish what you started. She is quite beautiful for a human. I think I would enjoy taking her body before I take her life._

I snarled at him and Bella tensed up behind me her hands gripping the back of my pants. "You'll never touch a hair on her head you sick fuck. I'll destroy before you get anywhere near Bella." The thought popped into his head and he rushed at me fast but not fast enough. I whirled grabbing Bella in my arms and ghosted out the back door with her. How could I be so fucking stupid? How could I let him get this close. Oh that's right… I'm an idiot… I need to remember that.

The rain came down in heavy sheets and Bella shivered in my arms. She clutched my cold chest crying trying not to scream. I cursed myself some more. If the tracker didn't do her in pneumonia would. My speed was weighted down marginally from having to carry Bella. The tracker was right behind me. I could hear his thoughts all around me.

_Run Run as fast as you can. You can't run from the boogey man. _"Boo" he boomed from the clearing in front of me. Bella screamed loudly and he doubled over laughing.

"Did you little pet piss herself? I can smell her fear from all the way over here."

"Edward get me out of here…please." She pleaded and I cursed the sky.

Fuck me man! I needed to get Bella somewhere safe. Where the hell were Emmett and Jasper and Alice?

The tracker rushed at me again but again I was too quick. I ran into the trees trying to put something of an obstacle between us.

_Hold up bro…I'm coming…I'm coming…._Jasper was near by.

_When all this is over I'm gonna let Esme really give it to you about be responsible you halfwit._ Alice was closing in.

_Cant keep it in your pants for one day bro. Damn Jasper was right. You might actually be worse than me._ Emmett was right behind them.

"Called for reinforcements have you? What are you afraid to fight me on your own? How sad for her to be procted by someone so spineless. Enjoy you last moments of life Bella cuz you're gonna be dead in a few!" James cackled out as I basically ran in circles trying to buy time. He stopped short and doubled back the way he came closing the space between us fast. I knew I was about to get cornered. I had no other choice. My family wasn't close enough for me to put Bella down yet and I knew she would have let me go either way. I hovered over her preparing to barrel through the trees. Leaning in with my shoulder I broke through one. It cracked loudly falling to the ground on the side of me.

_Edward look out behind you!!!! _Alice screamed in my head. I whipped my head around in time to see him. Right at my heels. Smirking like he was cat that just caught a mouse. He leaned down and gripped my calf dragging me down. Bella lurched forward in my hand but I clutched her tightly…something somewhere cracked and she howled. The sound was almost as bad as that night back in my room. I kicked him off me trying to regain my balance but couldn't. I crashed down into the wet earth and had just enough time to send Bella flying from my hands. She landed with a thud a few feet away from me. I looked up. She didn't move for a second and then I felt the whoosh of air as the bastard jumped over me. She screamed as he landed on top of her pinning her to the ground.

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**A/N Oh No.... whats gonna happen.... omg I'm soooo nervous...wait... I already know... But you dont..... Lol...**

**The fighr shall resume in the next chapter..... Im takig my time with it because i want it to be a good one... Lots of angry Edward as one of my faithfuls had requested so long ago.... Hope you enjoyed this one**


	32. Morning after

**A/N Sorry it took so long to get this out but I've had a pretty busy week...school...neice's 1st birthday and all that bit... But it's here and i hope you enjoy it**

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**Please Don't…Wake me Till the Morning After**

**BPoV**

James grabbed my wrists above my head with one hand and my breast in the other. He dragged his tongue along my jaw line freezing me in shock and fear.

"Hmmmm you taste almost as good as you smell. I'm really gonna enjoy this."

A snarl ripped through the air that should have turned my blood cold but instead irrationally calmed me. I didn't even hear Edward's footsteps as he charged up savagely knocking James off of me. They smashed into the middle of a tree that cracked over them and was coming down at me fast. Choking on rain I tried to roll out of the way but a heat burned in my chest . A pair of icy hands grabbed me just in time as the tree slammed into the ground.

"Oh my God Bella are you alright?" Alice asked panicked passing me to Emmett. It was hard to breathe but I wasn't worried about me at that moment.

"Edward" I called out reaching for him. I rolled over in Emmett's arms to see Edward rush at James grabbing him by his face.

"Give me your face!" he yelled slamming him into the ground. His fist pounded into James' face, how many times I can't tell you, right afterwards.

"Damn…remind me not get on Edwards bad side will ya?" Emmett joked. The movement of his body from his laughter caused me to slide in his arms and I yelped in pain. Edward's attention snapped to me momentarily and Emmett's hand clamped over my mouth stifling my shriek as James overpowered Edward, slamming him to the ground and pinning him. He snarled, baring his teeth like he was going to rip Edward's throat out and slammed his fist down into his face. I thrashed in Emmett's arms trying to throw myself at them …some how get him off of Edward but Emmett's hold was too tight.

"Jesus, calm down Bella. You're gonna hurt yourself even more." Emmett pulled me back to his chest restraining me and hunched his shoulders trying to shield me from the rain. Edward pushed up, lifting his foot to James' chest and launched him off. He landed against the trees again and Edward wasted no time. I knew he was fast but not that fast. He cleared the distance between them in the blink of an eye, grabbing James by the arm and throwing him to the ground. Edward's porcelain skin shone bright in the moonlight as he hovered over a screaming James holding something in his hand then hit him with it. I realized then what it was….James' arm. He just smacked James in the face with his own hand. Some dark part of me wanted to laugh at the irony of it but Emmett beat me to it.

"Ha Ha. That right bro! Rip that pussy bitch apart!"

James staggered up onto his feet. His equilibrium was slightly thrown off by the lack of a limb. His eyes flicked to me and I shrunk back against Emmett's chest.

"You said I wasn't gonna lay hand on her…guess you were wrong…I got more than that." His tongue flicked out of his mouth running along his lips.

"You shut your fucking mouth you slimy piece of shit. I'm going to kill you. I think you should know that. I don't intend to be nice about it either so don't cry like a bitch when you feel the pain,"Edward growled back at him. They were circling each other now and to me it looked more like a dance than a fight.

"Oh there will be causalities little Cullen boy. It's been a long time coming. Someone needs to rip one of you Cullen bastards off your high horse. One of us is going down and I assure you it won't be me!"

"Want to place a bet on that? We could always ask my sister although I don't know how I would feel knowing I was about to get slaughtered and not being able to do damn thing about it. Shame that slag isn't around to help you. You're going to need it." The tone in Edwards voice was something i had never heard before. It was venomous yet extremely cocky at the same time.

"I don't need her help. So you ripped my arm off big deal. I've got another one. "

"Not for long."

"Oooh I'm so scared…Ed….ward…."

"If you were smart you would be."

My stomach rolled as I saw the arm that Edward was holding reaching for its owner…the fingers grasping at the air between them. Edward snapped it in half throwing it behind him like it was no more than a twig. He was impossibly strong and fast. How could I have ever doubted him?

James rushed at Edward hissing like the evil snake but Edward was faster. All I could see was a blur of white but I could hear the unmistakable sound of their bodies crashing into each other over and over again. My heart was pounding in my chest. If Edward was getting hurt I couldn't tell and it was killing me. I could feel the frustration welling in my chest making me want to scream.

"Emmett help him please. Please don't let him get hurt!" I cried out clutching his shirt.

"Edward is a big boy Bella…He can fight for himself…trust me…he doesn't need my help."

As if the Gods were answering my silent prayers Edward and James pulled apart. I strained my eyes over his body…he seemed fine…James on the other hand did not.

"I'll give it to you Cullen. You're not making this easy." James said seeming out of breath and unable to stand up straight.

"Stop talking and die already. I'm bored with this,"Edward spat back at him almost laughing. It looked like he was actually enjoying the fight. James snarled and rushed at Edward again but he just stepped…literally stepped to the side and grabbed James by the ponytail and threw him to the ground.

"Jasper start a fire. I'm ending this now," he yelled over his shoulder before stomping on James' back. There was a loud snapping sound and James cried out in agony. His lower body thrashed wildly on the ground and I could tell Edward had snapped his spine. I stared wide-eyed and speechless as Edward helped Jasper start a fire beneath some trees while James squirmed on the ground trying to pull himself back together.

"Bella don't watch. You…You don't want to see Edward like this." Alice said coming to stand in front of me. Nothing in the world could have made me turn my eyes away. If James somehow got up….If Edward somehow got hurt…no…as long as I was watching he would be okay. Alice attempted to cover my eyes with her hand but I pushed her away watching Edward gracefully tear the broken tree into pieces and toss them into the now growing fire. Suddenly she froze and then snarled turning her back to me. Emmett held me closer snarling in the same direction as Alice. I scanned the trees to no avail. I did not see what they saw. I could not hear what they heard or smell what that smelled.

"That bitch!" Alice took off running jumping over James body on the ground.

"She's going after Tanya by herself?" I screamed at Emmett but he just laughed at me.

"Alice can handle herself Bella don't worry. Alice has whooped that girl's ass more times than I can count."

My eyes wandered back over to Edward and I instantly wished I hadn't. Alice was right. I couldn't hold back my tears as I watched Edward flash over to James and then reach down and slowly but forcefully rip off James' other arm and throw it into the fire with a strange mix of rage and pleasure painted on his face. Then he ripped legs one by one into the fire like the were toys. James was still screaming and thrashing his head around …nothing more than a torso in Edwards's hands. Horror settled into me and I screamed my head off as Edward sank his teeth into James neck severing his head in onw swift movement and then kicked it like a soccer ball into the fire. A sickeningly sweet smell permeated the air and I felt like I was about to vomit through my tears. Instead I dry heaved once causing a pain to sear through my chest and passed out.

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When I came to, I was back in my bed. My eyes opened to a pair of heartbreakingly sad eyes staring into mine black as the night sky. I was startled and flinched causing the face above me to do the same then disappear.

"I'm sorry Bella. Please don't be afraid of me. I'm not going to hurt you." Edward said from the other side of the room. I sat up slowly feeling tightness in my chest. There were bandages wrapped around me and in coming out of my fog I remembered what had happened before I passed out.

"Oh God, Edward are you okay?" I asked scrambling to the bottom of the bed to grab his hands. Tears welled in my eyes as he slowly walked over to me and put his hands in mine. I wrapped my arms around him, searching him with my hands and lips. The tears spilled from my eyes as I realized he was okay…I was okay more or less …It was over. Tanya was gone…James was gone…I was safe again.

"Oh Edward. I'm so happy you're okay. I'm so happy that bastard didn't hurt you." He picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist clutching him to me. He buried his face in my hair breathing me in and hugging me.

"I'm sorry that I hurt you Bella. I'm sorry I let him get to you. I'm sorry that I let him touch you like that….I'm sorry that you Emmett didn't just take you away…You shouldn't have had to see me that way." I pressed my lips to his neck running my fingers though his hair. He turned falling back against the bed running his fingers up back and the pulled my face to his.

"Edward you protected me. You have nothing to be sorry for." He pulled my face down kissing me slowly. I stroked his hair and his face deepening our kiss in my attempt to physically reaassure that my feelings had not changed. That it didnt matter what i just saw as long as he was here and he loved sound of someone clearing there throat in the hall broke our concentration.

"Okay guys that's enough. Isn't that what got you guys into this mess tonight in the first place?" Alice asked laughing as she came into the room. I rolled off Edward fighting back a groan of pain. No need to make him feel worse. Alice came to sit at the head of my bed staring into Edward's eyes. I knew this look. Oh God now what?

"Where do you think she's gonna go? She can't go home… she knows we'll look there." He asked her finally." Oh fuck! I didn't need to be a rocket scientist to know who they were talking about.

"She got away!"I asked jumping from the bed instantly regretting it. Pain ripped through my chest and I doubled over falling into Edwards hands.

"Bella take it easy. You're gonna hurt yourself."

"I'm already hurt Edward." I snapped back pulling away. "What the hell happened? How the hell did she get away?"

Alice looked up at me biting her fingernails. "I'm sorry Bella. I ran as fast as I could. I chased her all the way down to the highway. There was a guy peeing in some bushes…she stole his car. I couldn't chance her down the highway on foot now could I?"

Damnitt to hell. This madness was supposed to be over.

"Well is she gonna come after me again? I'm not sticking around for that…I don't care what you say…If she gonna come after me again I'm getting the hell out of here. I'll go to Jacksonville…maybe she won't follow me there."

"You can't Bella. You can't leave. It isn't safe for you anywhere but here. If you go to Jacksonville she'll have some human come after you. I've already seen it. You have to stay here with us. Edward will protect you. Me and Jasper are going to track her down. We'll get her don't worry."

"Bella, I'm so sorry Love. I'm sorry to put you through this. I promise I'll do what it takes to make you safe again…this whole mess is my fault….I'll make things right again I promise you."

"Promises promises Edward….don't promise me… just do it!" I snapped at him ripping myself out of hands." The look on his face almost sent me to my knees. Anger and fear were running thick in my blood and because of it I was lashing out. He stood up slowly walking towards my bedroom door silently and a few seconds later my front door slam hard enough to rattle my windows.

"Where…where is he going?" I asked turning to Alice. Tightness returned to my chest making it almost impossible to breathe, but it wasn't from my injury. That was the first time Edward had ever walked on me and it hurt like a punch to the chest. To think that I had done that to him before…

"Edward just needs a minute Bella. Don't worry. He'll be back in a few. He's just brooding as usual. He really feels awful about everything…this whole situation…what you saw him do…He feels awful. Jasper can't even stand to be around him right now."

Alice reached out her hand pulling me back into the bed. I lay down beside her and she stroked my hand staring out the window. She was quiet and in her quiet I sank into my own thoughts.

How long would it take for them to find her? When they do find her what's gonna happen? Edward and Alice probably want her dead but what about the rest of the family….She is Rose's best friend. Will they lose their Denali family because of me? The weight of the world felt like I was on my shoulder and I didn't know what to do. I wanted her dead…dead and gone and burning in the woods like James. If I had the strength I would do it myself. But at what cost? Rose would hate me even more than she already does. I felt hog-tied and gagged. There was no easy out to this situation…It was either kill or be killed…rather let be killed than be killed.

Alice sat there in silence for about an hour before I started to grow restless. I pulled myself out of the bed and into the shower. It was around 10:30 in the morning and I was tired of sleeping. I closed my eyes letting the hot water relax me. I heard a rustle in the shower curtain and slowly opened my eyes when that comforting scent engulfed me. I turned around into Edward arms burying my face in his chest.

"I'm sorry for what I said Edward. That was unfair of me." He buried his face in my hair holding me to him tenderly.

"It's okay Bella. I deserved it."

"No you didn't Edward. This isn't your fault so don't feel guilty. I can see why someone would go crazy for you. I'd probably put out a hit on someone for trying to tear us apart." I pulled back staring up into his eyes and he smiled down at me before kissing me softly.

"Bella nothing and no one is going to tear us apart. You've already seen what I would do to someone who tries to take you from me."

"Yes I have." I said back laughing tightening my grip around his waist. Edward and I washed each smiling and kissing each other but you could still feel the tension thick in the air like steam. After rewrapping my bandage he left me to get dressed while he made me breakfast. When I came back downstairs the glass was cleaned from the floor and Edward was pushing scrambled eggs around in plate.

"Sit down and eat. Charlie's outside getting his bags out of the car. You fell downstairs at my house and bruised a rib so I just brought you home from the hospital so you wouldn't have to move around so much. We just got here an hour ago and found the window broken." Edward said looking up at me from under his eyelashes. I threw myself in the chair just as Charlie opened the door.

"Bells you here?" He called from the front door.

"In here Dad!" Charlie walked into the kitchen eyeing Edward and I and then the food on the plates looking mighty tan might I add.

"Do you need any help with you bags Chief Swan?" Edward asked looking all innocent.

"No…you finish you breakfast Edward. Bells what happened to the window?"

I'm an awful liar. I felt my face turning red before I could even open my mouth. Forever my savior, Edward retold our cover story so I didn't have to…and so he could avoid having to put food in his mouth.

For the next hour Charlie talked about his vacation repeating how grateful he was to Carlisle for giving him those tickets and then talking about how strange Billy Black had acted when he found out I had ran into Jacob and even worse when he found out where I was staying.

"The Blacks have anything against your family Edward? He's never said a word about you guys before this." Charlie asked him. I looked Edward right in the face waiting for the answer remembering how freaked out Jacob had seemed. When we had breakfast that one time we were on the verge of a screaming match. He wouldn't let up.

"Um…I think it might have something to do with property lines or something. My dad owns all the land that apparently reaches the reservations border. We may have strayed onto their land hunting once or twice." Edwards face was in full composure. The kind of face he uses when he lies. There was more to this than he was letting on.

"Oh well that's no reason to get all crazy. He was insisting that we come straight home. Took me forever to get him to calm down. I swear I think he might be losin it." Charlie said finally getting up from the table. "In any case we're having dinner over there tomorrow night. S'been a while since we've all been together. Would be nice to see ole Jake again. Hear he's gotten pretty big."

"Um yeah Dad…he's uh real big." I could barely pay attention to what my dad was saying. I was to busying staring at the fork in Edward's hand that he had curled into a ball.

As soon as Charlie was out of ear shot Edward jumped up from the table taking the plates to the sink.

"Tell your Dad you don't feel well enough to go down there. I can't have you out of my sight and Alice can't see you when you go down to La Push so it's too dangerous." His back was rigid as he washed the dishes.

"Um…okay…but I kind of want to go Edward. I mean the less I'm in an obvious place the less of a chance Tanya has of finding me or sending someone to find me."

"Bella you're not going so forget it. I'll tell Charlie that Carlisle wants you in bed for the rest of the week." Edwards were eyes were black when he turned around to look at me. I watched him for a few seconds and took notice of how he wasn't breathing like he normally does.

"You need to eat. I can't go with you when you go so while I'm at La Push you go hunt. I'll keep my phone with me. Stay close and if something looks suspicious then I'll call you. No human is gonna get past Charlie and we'll be out in public. Tanya won't come after me herself in public. I doubt she's that stupid. And let go of my counter." Edward was gripping my kitchen counter with a pissed off look on his face so I knew he was in danger of breaking it. He hands eased off the counter and folded over his chest.

"Don't make this harder Bella. Have the Blacks come here if you really want see them. You are not going to La Push. End of discussion"

"Edward you're being unreasonable. You need to hunt and I…I need a break." I can't believe those words actually came out of my mouth. That was the feeling that I had deep in my stomach since Tanya came into my life and turned things upside down. I had spent the past month surrounded by vampires at all time and one of them wanted me dead. If for only an hour I wanted to feel like I had a normal life again…so I could breathe. But Edward looked as if I had just ripped out his heart. He sank back against the counter staring at the floor. I knew he was taking what I said the wrong way. Before I could explain he spoke. His voice was soft and broken like he was trying not to sound hurt.

I'm…I'm sorry Bella. I didn't know that you felt that way. I'll give you your space then. I'll go hunt…send Emmett or Jasper to watch the house if he hasn't already left yet." I felt something squeeze my heart and threw myself across the floor to him.

"Edward …wait…wait…I didn't….I didn't mean it that way."

"No Bella…its okay…I understand. The past month has been very stressful for you even though I _tried_ to make things good for you. In light of what happened last night I'm not surprised you need some time to re-evaluate things. I sure would probably feel the same way. I'll go now…but I'll stay close to Forks incase I'm needed back here. Emmett will watch the house while I'm away. Beside you haven't seen your father in a month. Spend some time with him but please just don't go to La Push okay. It will be hard enough for me not being able to be with you. I couldn't take not be able to see you too." He pushed me away gently and kissed the top of my head before ghosting to the door before I could say a word.

"I love you Bella," he said softly.

"I love you too Edward," I whispered back but it was too late. He was already out the door. But with his super hearing he had heard me right?

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**A/N okay so i've been waiting since Trnasformers to use that give my your face line cuz i thought it was a kick ass thing to say. In any case hoped you enjoyed this chapter...the next one should be up soon**


	33. Trouble

**A/N So here lies the next installment of the twisted tale I've weaved.....Enjoy**

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**Trouble**

**BPoV**

It was quiet the rest of the day. Charlie attempted to show me pictures from his trip but sensing that I was preoccupied he turned on the TV instead. I attempted to get up and cook him dinner but I was too upset. I hated the way things were left with Edward and desperately wanted to hold him in my arms. Emmett had text me a few times letting me know he was running patrol outside my house and I was tempted to tell him to go home. I just wanted Edward to come back. I tried to text him a few times asking him to call me and come back to the house but he responded only once:

_Already left…Need to hunt…we'll talk wen I get back._

No I love you like he would normally say. No I miss you and I'm coming right back. By 9 o clock I was going crazy that he wouldn't call. I checked in with my mom and told her I would have to put off the trip until the end of summer due to my "stairs" accident. She was disappointed but understood and then I caught up with Angela.

I was doing anything I could do to keep my off of Edward but of course nothing worked so of course I got even more aggravated with this whole situation. By the time Charlie had gone to bed I was fuming. I stomped up to my room and threw the window looking for Emmett. He spotted me and within seconds was slipping into my window.

"You know for someone with a bruised rib you sure are moving around a lot. Maybe you should sit down or something." He said laughing sitting in my rocking chair.

"I'm restless. Edward won't talk to me and I feel like I'm waiting to go to the executioners block."

"He's sad. He won't talk to me either. Says he's not in the mood for my jokes."

"Where is he?"

"He's home."

"He's what! What do you means he's home!? When did he get back!?"

Emmett looked down at his feet before laughing. "He...He never left. Did you really think he would? He stayed in town to hunt. He asked me not to tell you. He was gonna come back tonight while you were sleeping. Stalk you like he used to. You know real creeper style. He knows you're upset and he wants to give you your space like you asked."

I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I flopped back against my bed a little to roughly and let the tears flow. Emmett slowly walked up leaning over me and I threw my hands over my face.

"Ewww Bella are you crying? Dont...dont cry...Stop crying. I dont know how to deal with crying girls."

"Shut up Emmett I'm upset. I messed up. Uh...the thought of all the stupid things i said...I got angry with him and said things I shouldn't have cuz I'm so pissed at this whole situation I can't think straight and now he's mad at me and he won't even talk to me and its driving me crazy."

"Bella, he's not mad at you. He feels guilty and he's brooding as usual. He's also giving you space. He knows you go too easy on him. He just wants you to make a well thought out decision."

"Decision about what?" I looked up at him rising and eyebrow…what the hell was he talking about?

"About whether or not you want to stay with him." I must have stopped breathing for a second because Emmett kicked the bed startling me.

"He thinks I don't want to be with him? That's ridiculous." I asked him feeling the air burn in my chest. Emmett sat on the edge of my bed smoothing his hand over the space between us.

"Listen Bella…I'm not even going to pretend to understand what's goin on in the kid's head. Honestly I don't see why he hasn't just changed you already short of Charlie. But in any case he's just like you in that he sacrifices for what he loves and apparently he's willing to sacrifice his sanity for you to be happy. But I wouldn't worry too much. You should see him when you're not around…he's all jumpy like a squirrel until he's around you. And incase you didn't notice you're the same way. Even now you can't stop fidgeting."

I realized then that he was right. Ever since Edward and I had started our relationship the better part of most days was spent with me touching him in some way and when he wasn't around I never knew what to do with my hands. My face turned beet red as I slid my hands underneath me sitting on them. Emmett sat with me for a while longer telling jokes and trying to cheer me up until I started yawning. I crawled underneath the blankets as Emmett pulled them up over me planting an oddly comforting kiss on my forehead.

"Goodnight little sis. Don't worry. Everything's gonna be fine. The universe has a way of working things out the way they are supposed to be. The fact that something brought you two together and he hasn't killed you yet proves that you guys were meant to have more. Think about that while you sleep."

I drifted off to sleep laughing to myself that Emmett had just said something deep and serious but inside I was hoping he was right.

I tired to sleep light so that when Edward came I would wake up but it didn't work. Instead I woke up the next day reaching out for Edward as I always did and felt nothing. I picked up my phone hoping he had called but only had a text from Carlisle –

_Hope this doesn't wake you. Em went home so Im here now. Remember to take it easy._

No word if Edward had been here or not so I buried my face in my pillow searching for his scent. I was wasting my time. I knew he hadn't come. And it pissed me off. He probably heard in Emmett thoughts that he told me he was coming and turned around and went home.

Stupid stubborn mind reading vampire boyfriend!!!!!!!

Ugh!!! Like it wasn't bad enough that I had to sit around waiting to hear news about whether or not they would find Tanya but now I had to worry about when Edward was going to talk to me again. I met Charlie in the kitchen mumbling hello as I poured myself coffee and sat at the table grabbing the parts of the newspaper he had already read.

"I spoke to Billy and Jake. They're really excited about seeing you later. I'm back to work today but I'll swing by and pick ya up on the way." Charlie was looking at me over his mug waiting for me to respond but all I could do was stare into the cup and mumble.

"I'm not going. Carlisle wants me to stay in bed and rest. Go without me."

"Now Bell's come on…it's been forever since we've all been together like this and Jake is taking off in a few days. I'll pick ya up and you can do there exactly what you're doing here. Sitting on you butt." I was in no mood for arguing. I was gonna save that for Mr. Overreaction when he finally decided to grace me with his presence.

"For Christ's sake Dad, I fell down the stairs yesterday." I said jumping up from the table slamming the newspaper on the table. Charlie looked back at me as if I had ten heads and then turned up his face laughing.

"Wouldn't be the first time you've had a bruised rib Bells. Hell I'm surprised you got through a whole month without breaking anything."

"Not funny Char, um Dad" I answered back laughing. "I'm going back up to bed to lie down." I turned to climb the stairs and heard my phone ringing. I took off in a painful sprint stumbling up the stairs when I realized it was Everlong playing.

"Edward?" I breathed into the phone when I finally picked it up.

"I'm just calling to check on you Bella. Are you still in pain?" His voice sounded weird. It was too formal like he was asking me about the weather.

"Yes…I'm fine. I would be a lot better if you were here. I need to see you. I need to explain what I meant yester…" He cleared his throat cutting me off and when he spoke I could feel a twinge of pain in his voice.

"No need to explain Bella. I understand what you meant." I started to feel like someone was squeezing my heart. I curled up on the edge of my bed and rested my forehead on my knees.

"I don't think you do Edward. I think you're taking what I said out of context and being silly. If you would just come…"

"Bella, I'm not being silly. I'm being fair. You need time to think…I get it…you watched me rip another sentient being apart and I'm sorry to say enjoy it. I would expect you to have some apprehension to being with me so take some time to think about whether or not you would like to continue our relationship." My stomach started to twist into knots. I felt like I was about to burst out in tears but instead I just barked at him:

"Are you sure you aren't trying to end it yourself? You know I don't feel any different about you."

"Trust me Bella, I'm not trying to push you away. I can barely think straight right now I'm so upset but still I want to be fair to you. I told you I would never push you into anything. I'm giving you your space."

"I don't need space Edward…I need you. Get over here and at least talk to me face to face." He sighed and I knew I losing the fight. He wouldn't come.

"Bella, I'll call you later. I'm waiting for a call from Alice anyway. I'll call you later tonight and let you know what's going on. I believe Emmett is going back when Carlisle leaves for the hospital so don't worry you'll be safe. Bye." And then he hung up the phone. I felt like screaming. He was being so fucking stubborn. I picked up a book that was laying on my nightstand and threw it against the wall.

I tried reading but it didn't calm me down. I tried listening to music but it only made me think of him so I shut it off. I took a shower…I watched crappy TV. Nothing could make me feel better. I knew if I kept pushing him he'd stay away longer so I let him be. Finally I decided to take his advice and went back to my bed to think about whether or not I wanted to be with him.

Who was I kidding there was no question about. It took me all of 5 minutes to confirm that I couldn't be without him. I was going nuts already and it had been only one day without him. What would I be like after weeks…months? Useless just like I felt right now. Picking up my phone I crossed my fingers and dialed Edwards's number. It rang three times before going to voicemail.

Fuck! I screamed throwing the phone against the wall. I looked at the clock realizing that Charlie would be on his way to La Push by now. I called him for directions and then threw on some decent clothes tossing the stupid green phone in the bottom of my bag and ran down the stairs.

I jumped into my truck realizing after a few minutes how much I had missed it while I was at Edwards. The sky was dark and I could smell the rain in the air around me. The drive down La Push was peaceful. It didn't feel like someone was after me, things felt normal just like I wanted. I tried to think nice happy thoughts about how things were before Tanya came. My normal. That was the normalcy I craving. When I could go hang out with friends knowing that Edward was off doing his own thing but I would still see him at night when he would slip into my bedroom window and sing me to sleep. My normal where there wasn't so much tension in the air instead I could hang out with my vampire family and play video games and do giant puzzles that would get framed with Esme and watch House marathons with Carlisle. That was my version of normal and that's what I wanted.

I pulled up to the Black's house and my memories came flooding back to me. I closed my eyes thinking about me and Jake playing in the dirt as kids, me getting sick every time he would cut himself and start bleeding, the end of the summer party for just the two of us he would throw me before I left for Phoenix. I missed that Jacob. The smiling Jacob that was the very best friend I had ever had next to Alice. This new Jacob was too paranoid for me. When I opened my eyes he was standing outside the door smiling that old smile.

"I thought you fell asleep in there" he said laughing helping me out of the car.

"Hmmm…I was taking a trip down memory lane. How've you been?" His eye glanced over me as we walked back up to his house.

"Better than you so I hear. Fell down the stairs at the Cullens hunh? Another fight with your boyfriend?" he asked raising his eyebrow at me. Oh there he's goes with his suspicions again.

"No!" I snapped at him. "I'm klutz like I've always been. Nothings changed there."

"Well I'm glad to see that you haven't been changed." Something about his tone caught me off guard and I stood frozen in the doorway until he pulled me inside. His paranoia must be rubbing off on me.

I greeted Billy and my Dad before we sat down to eat. The amount of food that Jacob consumed almost disgusted me. It should be a crime for a person to eat that much but I couldn't help but laugh as he scarfed down 3 giant plates of spaghetti and a whole loaf of buttered garlic bread. After all the catching up we did I was happy when Charlie and Billy left to go watch the game. I sat at the kitchen table watching Jacob wash the dishes.

"So um…where's the boyfriend tonight Bells?" His question startled me as I was off daydreaming about the person in question. God I missed him already.

"He's home I suppose. Could we not talk about him? You get all weirded out whenever you talk about him and I've actually been enjoying myself. Don't ruin it." I answered back flinging a dishtowel at him.

"Hmmm…just curious. Getting you to have breakfast with me that one time was like pulling teeth from a lion." He turned to face me grinning and I was taken aback for a moment. He looked so different from the last time I had really seen him but when he smiled I felt like were 9 again. I couldn't help but smile back myself. "I came didn't I?" I finally responded laughing.

Just then Charlie came in the kitchen handing me his phone. "It's Edward. Said he's been calling your cell for about an hour. Something wrong with your phone?" I tentatively took the phone from him hoping that I hadn't broken my phone when I threw it.

"Bella are you crazy?" he asked me when I put the phone to my ear. He didn't sound angry. He sounded like he was about to have a heart attack.

"No…Edward…I called you. You wouldn't answer. I got mad and couldn't stay in the house alone anymore."

"Jesus Bella, you scared me half to death. I'm sorry I didn't answer. I was on the phone with Alice. She's says Tanya is on the move but she doesn't know where she's headed. This is not the time for you to be down there. Come home. Drive slow enough that i can meet you on the road." My nerves must have been getting to me because I nodded in response like he could see me.

"Bella…did you hear what I said?"

"Yes…I'll meet you." I breathed out.

"Good. Alice already told me what you decided. I'm happy you still love me. I'm sorry for putting you through that but I was only doing what I thought was right. I love you so much… and I can't wait to see you…until this is all over…so we can go back to being normal again."

Words from my own heart. With a sigh I hung up rising from the table letting relief seep into my bones until I saw Jacobs face.

"Everything okay Bella?" He had that wild look in his eyes again and I knew he was about to start in on one of his paranoia trips. I so didn't have time for this.

"Yea Jake…everything's fine. I'm gonna go but it was good to see you before I left again." I moved into hug him and he grabbed me in his arms bringing his lips low to my ear.

"You're a horrible liar Bella. Always have been….that why we got into so much trouble as kids. What's goin on? You can tell me. If he's controlling you…if he's trying to hurt you…tell me…Ill protect you."

The sincerity in his voice reached my core and shook me. If what he was assuming had of been the truth I would have been moved to tears but he was so far off that my already bad mood was just amplified. I pushed…or at least attempted to push him off me but he didn't budge. Man was he solid.

"Jacob…what the hell are you talking about? Edward isn't anything but loving to me. You don't even know him."

"I don't need to know him Bella. I know his type. He's trouble. He could hurt you. I don't want to see anything happen to you."

His eyes were pleading with me as I pulled away. Something in them was so hard to walk away from but I didn't have time to sift through those feelings right now. The last thing I wanted was for Tanya to find me…here.

"I gotta go Jake. Take care of yourself. Good luck with school and everything." I didn't have the heart to say anything crass to him as I walked out. However disillusioned he was I knew he meant well.

I hopped back in my truck just as it started raining and took off for home. I drove slow hoping I would catch Edward running towards me. Little trembles of fear started eating away at me. The night seemed a little darker than usual…colder…eerie. I started silently praying that he would hurry up and get to me when the sound of wolves howling thunderously caught me off guard. I was scared shitless and almost slammed on my breaks when suddenly I heard my phone buzzing on the floor and realized that was why I didn't know he was calling me. The damn phone was in my truck the whole time. I leaned down to get it and out of the corner of my eye I saw something white flash in front of the car. Dread came over me…something bad was about to happen. I knew it like I knew my own name. I put the phone to my ear slowly and heard Alice on the other end.

"Bella….Tanya's in Forks. She's gonna find you." Realization hit me before my eyes focused on what was in there.

"I know" I croaked out

There she was standing in the middle of the road in front of my car.

"Oh…Bella….no...."I heard Alice say before Tanya slipped into the car taking the phone from my hand. She turned to me with a maniacal look in her eyes and a nefarious smile painted on her face. The last thing I saw was her crush the phone in her hand and blow the dust out the window before everything went black.

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**A/N Oh no...this is bad...really bad....lol...**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter....**


	34. Hide and Seek

**A\N Sorry it took so long for me to update but, I wanted to give people a chance to catch up. From now on I'm going to update after 200 views.

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**Hide and Seek**

**BPoV**

I didn't want to open my eyes. I didn't want to move. I was too afraid. The look on her face before I went out scared my will right out of me.

She's crazy and she's going to kill me and I'll never see Edward or my dad or my mom ever again.

Spaghetti wasn't worth it. I should have listened. I should have just stayed put, but no I left and now I was being held captive by the psycho vampire bitch and oh God what is that horrible noise?????

My head was pounding from Tanya hitting me but the noise she was making could have made my ears bleed. I finally opened my eyes and if I hadn't been in so much pain I would have laughed. The room I was in looked like something out of "That 70's Show" and Tanya was sitting behind a gigantic white piano with EDWARD CULLEN etched into the side of it in big orange letters. She was butchering "Moonlight Sonata".

"Okay…I think would rather you just kill me now then to make me listen to anymore of your horrible piano playing" I finally said to her pulling myself up onto the white couch. Her eyes snapped to me and I swear there flames in her eyes but at this point I was almost delirious with fright so I could have just imagined it.

"Do you really think it's a good idea to make me anymore angry than I already am?" She flew over me and I instantly regretted opening my big mouth. She grabbed my hair pulling me back down onto the floor and slapped me in the face. No matter how hard I pried at her hands she wouldn't let go. She just slapped me over and over until my face was raw. Needless to say it shut me up. When I stopped screaming at her she let me go and walked back to the other side of the room and looked out the window.

"So James is dead hunh. Figures." she said shrugging her shoulders. "If you want something done right you have to just do it yourself. Its one of the oldest sayings in the book. I should have known he would let me down. Men always let you down…they take things back…break promises…turn you down." There was edginess in her voice that was never there. It was cold and unsettling.

"So Bella.." she said turning back to me with a dead look in her black eyes but a evil smile on her lips. "Do you like the house? It and of course the piano were supposed to be my surprise wedding gifts to Edward. Did he tell you that he left me the morning of the wedding? Did he tell you that we came so close to being married but I made one little mistake that he just cant let go of…he just cant fucking let go of it! God he is so stubborn sometimes. Like a damn mule."

She was talking to me but she wasn't looking at me. Her fingers were twisting the curtains into knots and her eyes were darting around the room like she was scared someone was gonna burst in on her. Then she stopped talking but her lips were still moving and I realized what was really going on. If I hadn't been witnessing it I wouldn't have believed it but she had really lost her mind and that put a new wave of fear in me. Crazy people do crazy things….what the hell do crazy vampires do?

My eyes darted around the room looking for an exit. My chest burned…my head hurt…but I had to at least try. I didn't want to just give up…if I could even stall her, I thought, maybe Edward would find me in time. I watched her shake as she paced back and forth in front of the window as I slowly slid my way to what I prayed was the front door, but in keeping my eyes on her I wasn't watching here I was going and bumped into a table. A lamp crashed to the floor behind me and in a second she was on me. She grabbed me by my shirt lifting me up and tossing me back onto the floor as if I were nothing more than a doll.

"So let me get this straight…You steal my husband and my family, my lover is killed because of you and now you want to wreck my house? Do you want to take everything from me you selfish bitch!" She came at me again but luckily I landed close enough to the ugly ass piano that I rolled underneath it before she grabbed me.

"Tanya stop please!" I screamed out to her. "I'm sorry okay…I didn't mean to break your lamp. I didn't steal anything from you…I didn't even know about you until me and Edward were already together," I pleaded with her…trying to reason with her. It didn't work. She flipped the piano right from over me snarling.

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I'm tired of hearing your voice. I'm tired of you breathing…ruining my life…I hate you! I hate you so fucking much. You ruined everything. James was supposed to kill you and Edward was gonna come crying to me come back to me…and we would have been happy but no…Edward killed him…Carlisle wasn't supposed to let him do that and you got to live and it isn't fair! Now I have to kill you. I'm not a killer….no one has ever died by my hands…You've ruined everything. But I'll do it because I have to. You have to be gone for me to get him back. You have to die so he can love me," she screamed, staring at her hands as she stomped her foot on the floor sending it through the wood.

She closed her eyes and started pacing again mumbling to herself. I crawled backwards towards the windows being very careful not to make any noise. It wouldn't do me any good to scream, I already knew that, we would be in a secluded area but if I could at least get outside and run. It was far fetched and I didn't really think I could get away…I could try and just stall and hope that we hadn't gotten to far from forks.

God please let him come for me. Please let someone come for me. I don't want to die like this.

Tanya eased herself onto the couch staring at me from across the room freezing me up again.

"What the hell does he see in you? Why the hell would he choose you over me? I don't understand it at all. You're nothing. Nothing compared to me. And yet he chose you over me. It just doesn't make any sense." He eyes were boring through me, making me feel naked and exposed. It was as if she were mentally picking out every one of flaws. Tears started to burn in my eyes but I tried to hold them back. I would not let her see me break.

"I don't know what he sees in me. But he sees something and he loves me. Other people love me. I have a family Tanya. A mom and a dad. If you kill me you aren't just taking me away from Edward but them too! I'm sure you had a family once…think of how they felt when you died."

"Shut up Bella! I don't need you to remind me of something else that I don't have. My family practically abandoned me. I had to work my ass off…lie…cheat…steal…to become anything. And what happens…I meet a man with money and stature…finally a chance to be more just the middle child... and I get turned into a fucking vampire!"

Somewhere deep inside I felt bad for her. She probably wasn't always _so_ terrible. What on earth could have made her this crazy? I remembered Edward telling me about his, Alice's, and Jasper's gifts, how in their human lives they probably had some latent form of it and becoming a vampire with heightened sense just amplified them. Maybe it worked that way with personalities too. Maybe Tanya was unstable as a human and now that she was a vampire it was worse.

Tanya started pacing again and I hoped beyond hope that she was thinking about letting me go. I mean why keep my alive for so long? My breathing settled and I calmed down a bit as she continued to talk to herself. Maybe my reasoning with her was getting though, I thought. I could keep trying…keep stalling. He'll come…I know it.

"I don't know why he couldn't just marry me. I mean fine if you don't love me fine...it wouldn't have mattered to me. He knows that Carlisle and Esme wouldn't have taken me as a daughter if he didn't have me as a wife. I could have acted like I loved him if that's what he needed."

As I listened to her ranting I became more confused.

"Why on earth are you so set on being a Cullen? I mean if you don't love Edward why do you want to be with him so bad?" I finally asked her, not being able to figure it out for myself and if for no other reason than to keep her talking.

Big mistake.

He eyes flew open as if I had just insulted her and she came at me fast, picking me up, and pressing me to wall. My chest started burning again enough to bring tears to my eyes but I blinked them back

No she would not see me cry. She would not see that she was hurting me. I wouldn't give her that.

"Do you have any idea who they are you imbecile? She snarled in my face. What I could only assume was her venom landed on my cheek. She dropped me back to the floor and I wiped my face on my sleeve quickly once I realized my face was starting to get hot.

"The Cullens are the second biggest and most powerful known coven in the vampire world you idiot. But of course you wouldn't know that, you're not one of us no matter how hard you pretend. Carlisle used to be part of the Volturi so they pretty much look the other way when a Cullen fucks up. Others fear them almost as much as the fear the Volturi themselves. Who on earth wouldn't want that kind of power? The power to do what ever you damn well please and get away with it. Only an idiot wouldn't take any chance they could have to get that and Edward was my only way in and you almost ruined that for me for good you cunt-rag. He would have changed you and married you and you would have gotten my crest and my name and my place in the family and I'd be stuck in fucking Alaska with the goddamn penguins and polar bears."

In the few seconds I had, I thought about what she said. Edward told me all about the Volturi and Carlisle's involvement with them, but he never told me anything about their family other than they were different from their kind. I didn't have to much time to dwell on it though. I seemed to have set her off with my big mouth again and she lunged at me. I threw myself across the floor but I wasn't quick enough. She grabbed my ankle and squeezed pulling me back to her.

I screamed…an earth shattering mind numbing screaming because that's how the pain felt as she crushed my ankle in her hand. I couldn't hold back anymore. I had been as brave as I could. An hour I had been awake and he had not come through that door to save me…I had no sense at this point of how long she had kidnapped me or how far she had taken me. I could only hope that she would be nice enough to leave my body somewhere for them to find so that at least my parents could say good bye.

_Stall her Bella. Don't give up. _

Okay what the hell was that?

His voice was clear in my head as if he were standing next me. I lay there on the floor where she had thrown me staring up at the ceiling. I could almost see him through the haze of my tears. I could almost feel his gentle hands on my cheek wiping my tears away. A smile came across my lips. I knew she was going to kill me. I knew I wasn't going to make it out of this alive but if I could die with the happiest of thoughts maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

_Bella fight…Don't give up…You're stronger than this! Don't let her take you from me!_

I felt rather than saw her pull me up from the floor again. I lifted my hands to the back of my head and felt the sticky blood pouring out. I could feel myself blacking out…wanting to let the darkness the was creeping up on me take over and pull me under and let me rest. I was so tired.

_Damnitt Bella!!! Listen to me! Listen to my voice damn you! Open your eyes. STALL HER!_

"Okay…okay stop yelling at me grumpy. You're not helping!" I screamed out loud. I must have startled her because she dropped me and I landed on the couch. Ah sweet cushion…..it could have been a cloud.

"Tanya…what are you going to gain by killing me?" I breathed out to her. "You know what he did to James. You know Alice already hates you. Do you really want to sign you own death warrant? If you kill me…he will hate you…He will find you. Edward and Alice will kill you if I die. Please don't do this. Let me go. I will make them swear not to come after you. I will make him forgive you."

This seemed to stall her for a moment. She looked at me with a moment's hesitation, blinking rapidly as if the idea just occurred to her. And just as quickly as it came did it go. Her eyes seemed to darken more and her lips pulled back over her teeth in a vicious snarl. It was the most frightening thing I had ever seen in my life.

"You think I'm going to let you live so you can have him? If I can't have him no one will! Certainly not you!" She sprang on me faster than my brain could register. She grabbed my arm and her teeth…oh God her teeth felt like knives plunging into my skin. I screamed and thrashed against her until the pull came. The slow pull willing my life from me and I gave up settling back against the couch trying to think those happy thoughts as I waited to die.

"BELLA NO!" And then there was wind across my face and the teeth wretched from my arm. Somewhere a crash but I couldn't see it. My body rolled on to the floor and then I caught a glimpse of my savior. My eyes drank her in slowly, from the heels of her shoes to the curves of hips to her golden blonde hair. Rosalie. Rosalie had come for me.

"Rose leave! This has nothing to do with you!"

"Like hell it doesn't you crazy bitch! That my sister. God Tanya how could…how could you do this to us…the family… to Edward…to me. You're my best friend. You promised me you would never make me choose between the two of you! You've ruined the family Tanya. You and your selfish goddamn ways ruined everything we had."

Something inside me started to burn. It was like someone had poured molten hot lava right into my veins

"OH GOD!" I screamed in agony, my body arching off the floor. It was the venom. Edward wasn't kidding when he said it was the worst pain you could ever imagine multiplied by like a million. He was understating it. It was a billion times worse than anything I could have imagined. I wanted to black out but the pain was far too bad and keeping me far to alert.

"Bella!" Rose was back at my side trying to pin me to the ground. "Don't fight it Bella. You're just gonna make it worse."

"God it hurts…Ugh…It hurts so fucking bad!" Fire felt like it was searing through my veins and I was seeing white spots above me. "God damn you, you fucking stinking bitch….I'll have you fucking head on a silver fucking platter for this…I'll burn the rest of your body and put your head on a fucking stick for this." I screamed at Tanya. I cried, thrashed and screamed but Rose still held me to the floor cooing, trying to silence me.

"Shhh Bella…Shhh its okay…Edward will be here soon. He's on his way. You'll be okay…I promise you." Rose turned her head over her shoulder snarling fiercer than I had ever heard from her

"Tanya, look what you've…" She didn't get to finish her sentence. Tanya flew at her, grabbed her, and threw her into the overturned piano.

"I will not let her change. I going to kill her Rose. Don't you dare try and stop me." Tanya grabbed my head and I just knew she was gonna rip it off. I used the only defense I could at this point. I grabbed her head and dug my thumbs as far into her eyes as I could manage. She screamed dropping me to the floor and as I land I saw Rose run and tackle her. She grabbed Tanya's head and smashed it into the floor.

"Tanya stop it. What's done is done! I will not let you kill her. I will not let you do that to Edward. He's my brother and I love him far more than I love you. I will kill you myself if you come after her again. I don't want to but I will. I'll kill you myself do you understand me. Leave this place. Leave here and don't ever let me or anyone else in this family get so much as a whiff of you!"

Rose's body was shaking as she sobbed and eased off of Tanya. I thought was Tanya was going to come for me again but Rose grabbed her arm and pushed her towards the window.

"I mean it Tanya. I will rip you apart, right here where you stand if you do not leave. GO!" She pushed her hard. The glass shattered and Tanya screamed as she flew out of it.

Rose was back at my side in a split second. My pain had not decreased by any means. It only got worse. I could feel my voice growing hoarse as I screamed and screamed. Rose straddled my waist to keep my from thrashing on the floor more and she grabbed my face between her hands.

"Bella listen to me. Look at me Bella. Listen to me. Edward will be here any minute. Stop screaming…it won't do you any good and it'll only make him feel worse. Nod if you can understand me Bella…Shhh Shhh I know it hurts…nod if you can understand me."

I nodded.

"I need you to do something for me Bella okay…I saved you…I stopped her from killing you…you owe me okay…Don't ever tell him I let her get away. Don't ever tell anyone okay. I'll lose everything if they find out." She sobbed hard and her head came to my chest. She was crying and even through my seething pain I wanted to comfort her. I was being burned from the inside out but at that moment she needed me. I mustered as much composure as I could to answer her.

"Okay Rose." I croaked out.

I closed my eyes as she pulled me into her arms rocking me gently. I couldn't say how much time had past but then I was fading out of consciousness….maybe I was dying…maybe the venom didn't take because there Edwards voice again…._Bella…my Bella…Oh My Bella…I'm so sorry…God Damnitt I'm sorry Bella…_

And there was the feel of his soft hands again. His saccharine sent assaulting me….leading me, pulling into the blissful blackness like a dog on leash as my body burned and seared.

What a fitting punishment, I thought. Here I wanted to be the one to light the match that would send Tanya to her death and she had left me here burning alive.

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**A/N Hope you enjoy this, as I said before this story is far from over.**


	35. Tear

**A/N I just wanted to thank everyone for your continued support. It means the world to me that so many of you have stuck with my story and even more to those who always take the time to review so thank you.**

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**Tear**

**BPoV**

I hadn't the slightest idea what it was like to be dead but I sure as hell didn't expect it to be so damn noisy.

Beep…Beep…Beep…

I knew that I recognized the noise but in the fog of my brain I couldn't place it. Focusing on the beeping seemed to be dragging me out of whatever state of comatose I was in. My eyes opened first and I groaned and shut them quickly when they burned from the light.

Please God….no more burning. Anything but that.

Slowly I tried again this time taking in the room around me. What the hell was I doing in a hospital?

"Bella? Oh my sweet baby…My angel you're awake…You're awake! Thank God!"

I stiffened as my mother threw herself over my body crying into my she's here then that meant that I was not dead, I thought at first with relief and then I remembered what happened to me. I had been bitten…By Tanya…and the venom …Oh god….and here was my mother unknowingly offering herself up as my first meal.

"Mom…get away." I croaked out. My voice sounded hoarse and my throat was dry as the friggin Sahara during a drought. Renee placed her hands on my face kissing my forehead and I shut my lips tightly not wanting to take any chances.

"Oh Bella, you scared me half to death. When Charlie called…and oh your car…I don't know how you made it out of that alive but I'm so relieved that you did." So they staged a car crash to explain what had happened to me…Brilliant but then why did they bring my mom here?

"Mom…where's Edward?" I asked panicked. His beautiful golden head rose from the couch behind her. He sleepily rubbed his eyes and then locked onto mine. The pained look in his black eyes was unmistakable even in my state of confusion.

"Oh…Bella you're awake!" I reached out my hands for him choking back a sob that was forming in my throat as he walked slowly to the other side of my bed and instead of taking my hands grabbed the guardrails.

"Such a wonderful guy he's been Bella. He's barely left your side." She smiled up at him and he half-smiled back at her. I felt the tingling of a blush in my cheeks and reached up to touch them.

That's weird….maybe it's because I'm new….

"I'll go and tell the doctors you're awake and call your father honey." Renee said kissing me again before shuffling out of the room. Once I heard the door click I threw myself up and tearing at the IV. Edward's cold hand came over mine stopping me and it was then that I noticed he wasn't breathing.

"Bella, what are you doing?"

"Getting rid this stupid IV. Why did you bring me here? It isn't safe." I asked him still trying to tear out the IV.

"Where would you have liked me to take you Bella? Straight to the morgue?" He looked away as he said this biting in to his bottom lip.

"I don't know…I figured you would let them think I died…I certainly didn't think you'd bring me to a hospital. And to let my mom in here? What if I hurt her?" He slowly turned his head back to mine with a confused look on his face and then chuckled under his breath.

"Bella, you aren't going to hurt anyone. You're not a vampire. You're still human and by the grace of God you're going to be fine."

"But…how? The venom? Tanya bit me. I was burning." Edward fell back into the chair with the most pained expression I had ever seen on his face. He met my eyes for a moment and then lowered his head to his hands mumbling to the floor.

"Edward what happened? I can't understand a word you're saying." I reached out to run my fingers through his hair but he quickly snapped his head up, the agony apparent in his eyes.

"I sucked the venom out, and nearly killed you in the process. It's my fault that you're in here. Sorry doesn't even begin to cover how I feel right now," he answered through clenched teeth.

"Edward…Its…Its okay." I said covering his hands with mine.

"Don't do that Bella. Do not say "everything's okay" because this is the farthest from what anyone could ever consider to be okay." My bottom lip started to tremble and I didn't know if I was going to cry because I was hurting or because I could clearly see how he was hurting. Edward turned his ear up towards the door listening for a moment before turning back to me.

"Charlie's on his way in…I'm gonna go Bella."

"Why? I…I don't want you to go. I just woke up…please don't leave me."

"I…I can't face your father right now Bella. I'm sorry. Besides, I need to hunt. Your blood is starting to smell normal again after all those transfusions they had to give you." Under his breath he mumbled "because of me."

"Well that must have been a relief to you …me not smelling so good for a while." I said smiling trying to lighten his mood. He turned back to me with an adoring sparkle in his eye and a tiny smile on his face that went as fast at it came.

"I love the way you smell Bella. That's the problem." He gently squeezed my hands before turning for the door.

"Aren't you at least going to kiss me goodbye?" He sighed and I waited patiently as he slowly moved in and placed a tight-lipped kiss on my lips. He groaned as if it was hurting him and pulled away quickly.

"I'm so sorry Bella", he said softly with his eyes closed. Before I could open my mouth to respond he was at the door nodding at Charlie on his way out.

Charlie's reaction wasn't nearly as dramatic as Renee's but I could tell from the bags under his eyes that he was just as, if not more stressed. The next few hours were taxing. Three different doctors –none of them Carlisle- came in asking questions and flashing lights in my eyes. Orderly's kept coming in and out wheeling me from room to room for scans and tests and all I wanted to do was crawl back in that hospital bed and go back to sleep. I wasn't allowed food for another 24 hours so I lay there damn near starving, being fed clear gross liquid intravenously as Renee randomly burst into tears and Charlie awkwardly tried to console her. After the doctors told them I would make a full recovery I found that I had been out for about four days, my ankle was busted but would heal and be good as new, my lungs had almost collapsed (in my mind I figured that they had but the venom had healed them before Edward got to me) and I had stitches and a little bald patch in the back of my head. Renee carefully brushed my hair over it singing in her child-like voice while I let the morphine that coursed deliciously through my veins, lull me back to sleep.

The next morning it wasn't Edward's cold hands that startled me awake. I knew before I even opened my eyes because I knew his hands and those were not them. I felt panicked for a moment as I was shocked from a nightmare that James had somehow returned from (the dead?) and was about to make quick work of ending my life.

"I swear you like a damned squirrel sometimes." I opened my eyes to Emmett holding a small plastic cup of water and mouthwash in a one hand and a little pink plastic bucket thing in the other. "Here, I've never been a fan of morning breath." I could feel the full on blush as I rinsed my mouth and spit in the bucket. Emmett settled himself in the chair staring at me for a moment.

"What? What are you looking at me like that for?" I asked him running my fingers through my hair. He narrowed his eyes at me for a moment but then smiled.

"You know I should pluck you in your forehead for sneaking past me like that."

"Um…yea about that…I'm sorry."

"Yea…I know you are." He was smiling but I could hear the sarcasm in his voice. "No really Emmett…I am sorry. You have no idea how sorry I am."

"Well…I can tell you that you aren't half as sorry as Edward is. That's the sorriest S.O.B. I've ever seen." I grimaced at the memory of Edward's painful expression flashing behind my eyelids.

"Hey…I'm sorry…you're not gonna start crying again are you? Edward's gonna kill me if I say anything to upset you so don't go getting me in trouble again…I already got read the riot act once this week and I don't feel like hearing it again. Frankly I found it wordy and very drawn out." He looked from his fingers back to me and cracked the famous "Emmett" smile. I couldn't help but laugh with him. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay and say bye before we left." I felt like my heart stopped for a moment until I remembered that he and Rose were planning to leave for "college".

"Oh…Thanks for stopping by. I'm gonna miss you." The smile on his face turned to a frown for a moment before brightening back up. "I'm gonna miss you too Bells. I won't have anyone to laugh at for falling down anymore." We talked for a few minutes about their plans to spend sometime time traveling in Europe before coming home for Christmas and what everyone else had been up to while I was out. When he got up to leave I was fighting back tears for his sake. Something felt off about his goodbye…It felt to final.

"Emmett...I'm gonna see you at Christmas right?" I asked him as he walked towards the door. He turned back with an obviously forced smile on his face and winked at me.

"Em...um…one more question."

"Yea…what's up?"

"Why…Why did he do it?" The smile left his face and he sighed heavily. Emmett had a habit of being brutally honest with me and I knew if I wanted an answer to the question I had been pondering for hours he'd give it to me.

"I don't know," he answered shaking his head. "It doesn't make anymore sense to me than it does to you aside from he just really doesn't want this life for you. None of us really _want_ this for you but we all know its inevitably going to happen unless…" He stopped, quickly changing his expression back to his winning smile before speaking again. "He just wants to do right by you Bella. I mean…if it's going to happen…do you really want it to an accident?" I shook my head slowly. My brain seemed to be focused on the "unless" but I couldn't formulate the words to ask him what he meant. We said goodbye once more and he flashed back over and hugged me before disappearing out the door.

At some point everyone came into check on me. Alice and Jasper came next. Esme came with a bouquet of beautiful wildflowers doting over me when Renee wasn't around and Carlisle apologized explaining that the weather hadn't permitted him to tend to me like he had wanted. Edward came back once and sat holding my hand talking with Renee. His body stayed rigid and he barely breathed. Once Renee was out of earshot he apologized and said it was harder for him to be around me because after tasting my blood the way he did, it now called to him with even more fervor. I could tell he was in pain and sent him back out to hunt and to say goodbye to Emmett and Rosalie. He did call everyday to check on me and I had the feeling that he had come at night but in my drug induced sleep I couldn't really tell.

**EPoV**

If you were to look in the dictionary for the word coward you would find a big picture of me. I couldn't bring myself to be in the hospital room with Bella and her family knowing I was the reason she was in there. Carlisle had her moved to a room that I could sneak into undetected and I went every night and held her hand trying to ignore the burning in my throat. It was like I was smelling her for the first time all over again but this time it was worse. Her scent beat me about the head with every bit of punishment that I deserved. I didn't go back while her parents where there until it was the day for her to come home. Bella slept in the car on the way home and didn't wake up until I had carried her upstairs and laid her on her bed. She opened her eyes slowly and smiled when she saw my face. Bella reached out her arms and went down on my knees resting my head on her stomach.

"Will you lay down with me Edward…or is it still to hard?" I looked up at her soft eyes. She had spent the whole morning trying to be brave and act like she wasn't in any pain but I knew her too well. The dark puffy circles under her eyes gave away how exhausted she was and every time she smiled I could see the slight turn down of the corner of her mouth.

"Of course Bella." Even though I knew I shouldn't have I crawled over settling on my side next to her. Fire raged in my throat but I couldn't deny her or myself. I missed the way her warm body felt in my arms, the way her touch seemed to set fire to my skin, the way her thundering heart felt against my chest as if it were beating for the both of us when we kissed. She pressed herself against me and I pulled the blankets around her to keep her from freezing.

"God it feels so good to be home" she said nestling herself further against me.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I can't believe I did this to you." Bella looked up into my eyes stroking my face.

"Edward…how many times do I have to tell you to stop apologizing? It's over now okay. Let's just forget this ever happened and move on from it. We're home…I'm home and safe here in your arms."

"You're not safe."

"Stop it Edward. I love you…now stop beating yourself up. We need to put what happened behind us and get things back to normal. Our normal."

"Bella would you stop being so passive about everything. You almost died because of me."

"Yes but I am also here because of you…and Rose. You both saved me. Now get over it. I have."

"I'm never gonna get over this Bella…over what I put you through…the picture of you lying in Rose's arms…God" I shuddered at the thought of it and she let out a small groan. "See…Jesus…I keep hurting you. I'm so sorry Bella." I moved to pull away from her but she gripped me tighter.

"Edward Cullen if you get off this bed I'll never forgive you. Stop this madness. I'm fine. I'll show you how fine I am." She pulled herself up meeting my eyes and slowly moved in to kiss me. I hadn't felt her kiss in days. Her slightly parted lips pressed against mine and I felt… at home.

"Hmmmm…Edward…God I've just missed your touch…hold me closer…please" I wrapped my arms around her pulling her closer to me. Her heart pounded in her chest against me. I tried to focus on the sound of it in attempts to control the urge to bite her. The burning in my throat had me feeling like was going to spontaneously combust, and I knew I had to let her go. But it was so hard, she was moaning softly into my mouth as our lips moved together. She slowly moved her hand up my side and I knew it was too much. I gently pushed her off and slipped off the bed.

"I'm…sorry…I didn't mean to…attack you like that." She panted out with a smile on her face.

"It's okay Bella…I want to hold you but my senses are telling me to stop…I can't be with you like that yet." "Okay Edward." She pulled herself up resting her back against the headboard. Her stomach started to rumble and we both laughed. "Looks like I'm as hungry as you are. Could you…I'd do it myself but," she motioned at her foot, "I'm ya know…incapacitated." I laughed and slowly bent down to kiss her again. I couldn't help myself. She never ceased to amaze me with her ability to lighten any situation. "Sure thing Love Anything you want I'll make it for you."

"Um…I could really go for like a giant turkey sandwich.I feel like I could eat a mountain lion right now." She winked at me and I couldn't keep myself from laughing.

"Bella…that's not really funny."

"Then why did you laugh?" She retorted mockingly, raising her eyebrow at me.

"You know…I think you spent too much time around Emmett." I said before leaving the room. As I walked down the stair Charlie's thoughts refreshed the guilt that Bella had been able to assuage.

_My little girl…Jesus…thank God Edward had gone looking for her…I don't know know what I would have done if she didn't make it. I shouldn't have let her drive home. I should have driven her myself…what was I thinking…_

He jumped when I walked into the kitchen. "Oh hey Edward. Bella asleep?"

"No. She's just hungry. I was gonna make her a sandwich…are you…would you like one as well Chief Swan."

"Edward I think by now you can call me Charlie…and sure if you already up." _He's a good boy. I'm glad Bella has someone watching over her when I'm not around…I wont be here forever…He watches over her…keeps her safe…he's a good boy._

"So…When is Renee leaving?" I turned my back to him as I made the sandwiches trying to hide the guilt on my face. Ha…I keep her safe…Right…I've been doing such a great job of that lately.

"Few days. She just wants to make sure Bella gets settled in before she heads back." _Now how do I say this without sounding rude…he's made my little girl so happy. I don't want to hurt his feelings._

As if I could feel any worse. Alice told me Charlie was gonna have a talk with me but she couldn't tell me what he was gonna say. Obviously he still didn't know. I set the sandwich and a beer down in front of him and saw in his eyes the same pain I saw in Bella's. "Edward could you uh…sit down for a second…I wanna…talk to you."

"Sure Charlie." I eased on to the chair across from him. It was never as easy to read Charlie's thoughts as it was to read other peoples which didn't surprise me because out of her parents, Bella was the most like Charlie.

"Listen…First off I just want to thank you again. You're always there for Bella. This is the second time you've saved her life…and I can't tell you how grateful I am that she has you looking out for her." Third I thought bitterly.

"Charlie…the accident…it was my fault…I shouldn't have called Bella out in the rain that way…I'm sorry."

"Nonsense Edward…If anyone's at fault here its me. I should have driven her." Jesus what's with this family? Can't any of them place blame where blame is due?

"You know me and Renee where your age when I proposed to her. I see so much of us in you two." A tiny smile crept on his face as he pictured Renee wearing a wedding dress like that looked like Madonna's in her "Like a Virgin" performance. "We were happy and inseparable like you two in the beginning, but she got restless and so soon after Bella was born she left. Took my baby girl with her and moved across the country."

"I'm sorry. I know that must have been difficult for you."

"Difficult is an understatement. I lost the two most important things in my life overnight." _No one besides Bella has been able to replace my love for Renee…God my little girl is my world…I hope she knows that._ I bit into my bottom lip. His words felt like spears of death shooting through me and I wanted nothing more than to flee from that table. See coward.

"See the thing is Edward, I can see how much you two love each other…and well if I know my Bella she loves like I do…unconditionally and irrevocably." I laughed because Bella had said these same words to me one night as we lay in bed.

"I feel the same way about her...uh…Charlie. I love your daughter with every ounce of my being. Like you I only want what's best for her." As I sat there I wondered how a heart that didn't beat could feel so much pain as Charlie's thoughts ran through images of Bella as a child which I guiltily savored and cataloged. It was obvious that he loved her more than anything and I had almost taken her away.

"I know you do Edward and that's why I'm saying this to you. I may not be the most emotional man in the world…but that little brown eyed angel upstairs means everything to me. When I lost her the first time it hurt like hell and now that I have her back…I don't want to lose her again. I can see that she'd follow you through the depths of hell if she had to…cause that's what I would have and would still do for her mother. I won't stand in your way if you wanna marry my daughter…no one's ever gonna be good enough for her but you're the closest thing to it. I trust you and I know you'll take care of her. You've got a good head on you shoulders and come from a good family. The only thing I ask is that you give me a little more time with my daughter. I don't know if I'll ever be but I"m sure as hell not ready to let go her just yet."

"Charlie, I" He held up his hand stopping me.

"I see the way you two look at each other. I know its coming. I feel it in my bones. One day I'm gonna wake up and my little girls gonna have run off with you somewhere and I just don't want that to happen. Don't take my little girl away from me Edward. She's all I have left." To my surprise tears were welling in his eyes and he bit his bottom lip the same way Bella does when she's trying not to cry. The gears clicked in my head and I felt devoid of all life as I looked into this fathers and eyes and realized what I had to do.

Slowly I rose from the table ignoring the vibrating phone in my pocket. "You won't have to worry about that Charlie. If that's all I'll bring Bella her food now."

"Yea…sure I'm done. Thank you Edward."

"You're welcome Charlie."

**BPoV**

Edward barely spoke when he came back with my sandwich. All he said was that he had a talk with Charlie as he sat with his back pressed against my bed. We watched movies on the 20" flat screen Alice had put up in my room while I was at the hospital and I played with his hair until I fell asleep. The next few days were pretty much the same with him coming to sit with me and then leaving at night only to come back through my window after Charlie had gone to bed. I couldn't figure out why but I sensed there's something in the wind that seems that tragedy's at hand. Once I was back on my feet able to hobble around I thought Edward mood was improve but no matter many times I danced and cracked jokes he wouldn't lighten up. Finally, as we sat at my kitchen table one afternoon I decided I had enough of his moping around and snapped at him.

"You're sort of a constant downer these days aren't you dear." He narrowed his eyes placing a plate of mushroom ravioli in front of me.

"I'm sorry Bella. I just don't find anything particularly funny about you current condition" He placed a glass of Pepsi in front of me and a sneered at him as I took the straw between my teeth.

"Edward how many times do I have to tell you I'm fine? These aren't even the worse of the self-inflicted injuries I've ever had…cause that's what they are when it comes down it. I did this to myself. You had no hand in this…If I had of just listened to you…"

"Stop it Bella. I thought you said we weren't going to talk about this anymore. Eat your food."

"Fine!" I said forking ravioli into my mouth. I chewed slowly not wanting to give him the satisfaction of seeing that I was enjoying the food. He sat there fingering the pattern on the table cloth as I ate in silence.

"Where's Alice?" I finally asked him trying to change the mood in the room.

"She's away."

"Away where…hunting…shopping…what's she doing…what's everyone doing…Have you heard from Emmett and Rosalie…are they in Europe yet?"

"She's away…Everyone's busy…and yes they are in Europe enjoying themselves." He didn't even look at me when he answered. He just stared at the table cloth with a morose look on his face.

"You know Edward…your attitude isn't help my healing process at all. Why can't you see that I'm okay? We're okay. Could you just cheer up please?"

"We're not okay." My breath caught in my lungs and I dropped the fork in the plate splattering sauce everywhere.

"Wha...What?"

"Nothing Bella. I didn't mean anything by that. I'm sorry I'm upsetting you. I could call Angela to come and sit with you." He moved his chair back soundlessly and rose from the table.

"Edward…I don't want Angela to come and sit with me. I want you to sit with me…stay with me. What's going on with you? You've been acting like this since you spoke to my Dad. What the hell did he say to you?"

"That he loves you Bella. Are you finished? Would you like to watch TV or something?" His face was expressionless when I looked up at him but when we made eye contact he smiled…a fake smile…the fakest smile I had ever seen on his face ever. I felt sick to my stomach.

"Yea sure…what ever you want to do." I handed him the plate and pushed away from the table. As I stood up to move I tripped over my cast and went tumbling towards the floor. He caught me before my face smashed into the tile.

"Careful Bella. We don't need to add a broken nose to your list of injuries." That same stupid smile was on his lips but his amber eyes had none of the light that they normally had in them. He swooped his arm underneath my legs and picked me. I placed my head on his shoulder as we sat down on the couch. I didn't move from his lap but turned and pressed my chest against his running my fingers through his hair.

"What would you like to watch love?" he asked rolling his head back. "I don't care" I answered into his neck.

His grip on me tightened as he turned his head to meet my lips. The remote slipped down my back as our lips slowly moved together. I felt myself getting dizzy as he exhaled over me. I tried to fight it but like always the haze was victorious. I gave in turning my body to straddle his waist. He leaned more into the kiss, a low growl rumbling in his chest as I ran my hands underneath his shirt.

"Bella…what…are…you …doing?"

He pulled his head back and stared into my eyes. They were turning black and I could feel the wetness pooling between my legs. Screw the doctors' orders. I wanted him. I wanted to feel like what I was feeling in the pit of my stomach wasn't true. I pushed up onto my knees and ran my hands down to his waist and pulled the buttons of his pants apart. His lips pulled back over his teeth when I grazed his lower stomach with my knuckles.

"What do you think I'm doing Edward?"

"Bella we can't… your ankle." As he said this his hands ran up the back of my thighs and he palmed my ass bring it down hard on his lap. We both moaned at the contact of his hard cock against my now wet center.

"I've got a broken ankle Edward…not a broke vagina. And from the feel of it you want it just as much as I do."

"Of course I do Bella. It's been hell having to keep my hands off of you but…"

"But nothing Edward. We need this. It'll make us feel better."

"I don't…"

I didn't let him finish. I crushed my lips to his pulling his bottom one between mine and sucking on it. He moaned pulling me closer into him before flipping me over onto my back. Within seconds my shirt was ripped from my body and he hungrily placed kisses down from my lips to my chest down to my stomach and then back up. His hands were gripping my waist as he ran his tongue s along my collar bone.

"God Edward…I've missed the feel of you hands on me." I was dizzy on the verge of blacking out as he gently sucked the skin at the base of my neck. I felt his teeth graze my skin and froze for a split second before realizing that they were just the front ones.

"Bella?" Edward hovered over me in all his shirtless glory. I ran my hands along the planes of his chest committing to memory every line and curve of him.

"Yes Edward?"

"Did I hurt you?"

"Of course not. I just wasn't expecting it. It's okay…please don't stop." I ran my hands over his strong shoulders and cupped his face in my hands pulling him down to me. He lowered himself being careful not to put any weight on my chest and slowly searched my mouth with his tongue. I twisted my fingers into his hair savoring the taste and feel of his tongue in my mouth and the feel of his glorious body against my hot skin. We kissed slow and passionately and before long I was shivering. Edward reached up to pull the afghan from the back to the couch between us but I stopped his hand.

"No Edward. Leave it."

"Bella… you'll freeze."

"I don't care. Leave it Edward. I don't want anything between us."

"Bella…"

"Nothing between us Edward. Remember you said that…nothing and no one will come between us….including that blanket." I pressed my body against him staring into his eyes so he could see the implication behind my words.

He kissed me softly once more before standing with me in arms and reaching down to pick up the torn scraps that used to be our shirts and flashing up to my room. He placed me down turning on the space heater beside my bed and came back to my side.

"I love you Bella." He said placing my hand over his heart. "You've given me so much and all I do it take take take. You risk your life every second you're with me and for what?"

"Because I love you Edward…and you do the same for me. Alice told me what would happen if the Volturi knew about us so you are taking the same risks that I am." I reached up and pulled his face towards mine pressing my lips to his. His hand carefully glided over my side and feathered across the top of my pants. I squirmed using the mattress to push them down as I pushed his over his ass. He followed suite carefully my pants off me and tossing them in a ball on the floor. I sighed out as he returned his position sliding his hand between my legs. My having gone commando worked to my benefit as he ran his icy fingers along my slit. His fingers cooled the fire that was burning within me but I wanted _him_ and nothing more. I need to feel his full length inside of me, making me feel whole and complete again.

"No Edward. I want you…just you…all of you… inside me now."

"Bella...we shouldn't do this....you're hurt and..."

"Make love to me Edward...I need you." He moaned into my neck as he moved over me between my legs. I brought one of my legs up making room for him as he placed himself at my opening and kissed me once more.

"Tell me if it's too much" We both said as the same time staring into each others eyes. A painful smile played across his lips.

"No matter what happens Edward I'll always love you. My heart…it beats because you breathed life into me."

"I love you Bella. You are the best thing that's ever or will ever happen to me." He slowly tapped his way into me. After not being with him for so long a little pain was there but he kept still allowing me to adjust. I slid my hand down to the small of his back giving it a little push to let him know I was ready.

"God Bella….the way you feel…its like nothing else in this world." His eyes were closed as he slowly pumped in and out of me. My back arched into him as I adjusted myself beneath him trying to feel him deeper. It was like I couldn't get close enough.

"Edward…god….I need you…I need you so bad…Make me feel you….I need to feel you everywhere. I felt the bed shaking and when I opened my eyes I saw that his trembling body was the cause of this. He looked down at me and his once amber eyes were now black and he had stopped breathing.

"Baby are you okay?" I asked cupping his face again. He nodded staring down at me before put a little more force behind his thrusts. I opened myself wide to him making room for his waist that was now crashing into me. Each thrust stopped the air in my throat and was incredible. It was like I could feel him all around me, thickening the air I was breathing. The dizziness increased and I felt like I was swimming in and floating all at the same time every time his lips touched me. He lowered his body to me allowing me to feel the length of his cold body on my hot skin. God how i loved this man.

The heart rising from my toes and with eagerness met his thrusts clutching his body for dear life. "Oh…God Edward…Im so close….Im so…so close….God…I love you…you make me…oh…oh… God…"

My walls came crashing down as an orgasm rippled through me. I cried out his name with tears running down my face. I flopped down against the bed feeling spent but feeling that he was not. For a moment my body ached but I needed him to feel what I had just felt and slowly moved myself on him.

He ran his hand along the side of my face and kissed me softly on the lips.

"Bella…you don't have to…"

"But I want to Edward. I want you to feel the way that I do right now." I pulled his hand down along my leg and he clutched my thigh pulling it up. He buried his face in my hair as he drove himself into me over and over again. The feeling of his cold breathe as he moaned and grunted in my neck sent me flying again but then his grip on my leg became to tight. His thrusts too hard and too fast. His body was shaking and I could tell he was fighting himself for control.

"Edward…Baby relax…please…calm down..." I got no response out of him other than a snarl that sent my body rigid. I choked back tears knowing he would hate himself even more if he really lost control and hurt me so I tired to just take and meet his thrusts but it became to much...much to hard.

"Edward…stop…stop for a minute…Baby you're hurting me." Something like a whine came out of him and I felt his body tense before he pushed off of me. He fell with a thud to his knees at the foot of my bed and I scrambled to meet him. His forehead was pressed against the floor and he was clutching his arms digging his fingers into them and shaking.

"God…I really am a monster. I can't do this…I can't do this anymore."

"Edward….baby….are you okay?" I reached out to him but he shrank back from my touch. I couldn't breathe. I was in so much pain looking at him.

"Edward talk to me…please…talk to me baby." I crawled off the bed kneeling on my knees in front him. I wrapped my arms around him resting my head on his shoulder.

"It's okay…I'm okay…I'm not hurt. I'm fine." He growled ripping himself from my embrace and it felt like he ripped my heart out with him.

"It's okay…you think that was okay…I was losing it Bella. I was hurting you…again."

"Edward. I'm not hurt. Look at me… I'm fine." I stood up in front of him but he turned his face away from me. For the first time in a long time I felt self-conscious about being naked in front of him and grabbed the blanket off the foot my bed drawing it around me.

"Edward stop it…you're…you're scaring me."

"It's about time you were afraid of me Bella." He looked me dead in the eyes as he pulled his pants back on and threw mine back at me.

"Edward…I'm not afraid of _you_. I'm afraid of how your acting…Its feels like you gonna..,"

"I'm leaving Bella."

Time seemed to stand still for a moment as we stared at each other. Then the earth shattered around me and the floor seemed to be swallowing me up as I slid off the bed. He grabbed me pulling me back up before my tailbone hit the floor.

"Where are you going...Edward…when will you be back?" I felt like had tunnel vision and it was a good thing he had extraordinary hearing because my voice came out so small that I didn't even hear myself.

"I don't know where we're going yet but I'm not coming back Bella. I have to go…I have to leave before I hurt you again." I sat there almost catatonic as he dressed me. The weight of his words felt like they were crushing the life from me.

"Wait…you said we're…is…is everyone going?" I looked up at him but he wouldn't meet my eyes. He was biting into his bottom that was visibly trembling. Tears. Actual…tears welled in his now bloodshot eyes.

"They're already gone. I thought it would be best for you to make a clean break. I just wanted to wait until I knew you were up and okay before I left." He moved to my dresser and pulled out a shirt that he kept stashed there and pulled it over his head.

"Edward look at me….Don't do this….I know you don't want to do this. Call everyone and tell him to come back home. You promised you would stay with me…You can't do this to me…to us…You promised Edward."

"Bella I promised to stay with you for as long as it was safe. It's no longer safe for you. I've now stayed to long here. It was unfair for me to drag this out as long as I did. It was wrong of me to interfere with your life to begin with."

"But you love me Edward…and I love you…how is that wrong?"

"Of course I love you Bella. I've loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you but that doesn't make this right. If you were dating a human you wouldn't be standing how you are right now. You'd be outside in the sun laughing and being normal."

"This is normal…you are normal…I don't feel the way with anyone else the way I do when I'm with you. I don't want that world Edward…I want our world."

"Bella…we don't have a world…I am a vampire. You are a human...our worlds aren't supposed to mix this way. " He turned towards the door and ice shot through my veins sending my flying towards him.

"Edward…please…you're…you're killing me…please don't do this."

"I know I'm killing you Bella ...that's why I'm leaving." I threw my weight against the door so he couldn't open but he simply lifted me up and set me aside.

"Bella, I love you more than words could possibly explain…and I love you enough to wants what's best for you and I"m not it. You deserve better. I've always said that…you deserve better than me."

"You obviously don't know what's best for me if you leaving me…there isn't anything or anyone better for me…there is you…and no one else. God…Edward please please…just go hunt and come back. Come back and we can pretend like this never happened." I looked up quickly to meet his eyes. His expression had not changed a bit.

"Bella our days were numbered to begin with…I'm giving you the chance to have the life that I can't offer. I won't take you from your family…your friends…if you stay with me you'll die…and I may very well be the one to cause that…and then I will die. You may not have one…but I do have a sense of self-preservation. It hurts me to be around you…and I'm tired of the pain and the burning…It isn't worth it anymore."

My heart skipped a beat. Two beats. Three. I thought I was dead where I stood.

"You…don't…mean …that. Take it back." He said nothing. He clenched his fists and turned away from me and walked down the stairs. I ran after him ignoring the pain in my ankle…the pain that was everywhere and followed him through the kitchen to the back door.

"Edward…" He came back to me wrapping his arms around me and kissed the top of my head.

"Bella listen to me…Understand…that everything…everything ends. This is our end. I love you and I always will…there will never be another you but I can't be with you. You'll get over this...I promise you. You'll go move on and meet someone new who will be better for you than I could ever even hope to be. You'll be loved like you never have known and the memories of me will seem more like bad dreams….just a series of blurs like I never occurred. Someday you will be loved and you'll get married and have a family and a good life."

"No" I cried into his chest clutching the sides of this now rain soaked shirt.

"Bella…Let me go…save your soul…before you're to far gone and before nothing can be done…cause without me…you've got it all…I'll only take from you the things I can never give."

I pushed myself off him and grabbed his collar crushing my lips to his. He faltered, kissing me back for a moment holding tightly against him, before he let me go.

"I'd tear at my soul for you my dear oh my dear oh please…I'm in love… I'm in love with you…please…don't leave me." I couldn't tell my tears from the rain drops anymore. I was freezing from the inside out shaking in his hands. He pushed me back underneath the awning with one hand and sliding the door open with the other. The warmth from inside did nothing to warm as I clutched his wrist unwilling to let him go.

"Bella, I need you to make a promise to me."

"Anything…I'd do anything for you."

"I need you to promise me you won't follow me…and that you won't do anything reckless. Charlie needs you."

"That's two Edward."

"Bella"

"Fine…I promise."

"Thank you. And I'll make a promise to you...This will be the last time you see me. I wont ever interfere with you life again...none of us will. Now go inside before you get sick…I don't want you to watch me leave."

"Go if you want to. I won't try to stop you. You can say that you're leaving but I know you'll be back …I know you will Edward…we're meant to be. You know it and I know. So I'll wait. I will wait for you…endlessly." He ran his hand over my eyes closing them and silenced me with one last kiss..

"Don't. I'm sorry. I love you. Goodbye."

He breathed out his last words dazzling me to the point of not being able to move. I shook my head clear of the fog when I realized I didn't feel him any more. I slowly opened my eyes and he was gone…Through the trees I assumed and because he only asked me for one promise I chose to follow him. I ran with the pain shooting up my leg but I didn't let it stop me. Every muscle in body screamed as I trudged through the wet leaves and trees into the dark woods looking for him.

I have to keep looking. I can't stop looking…If I stop then he'll leave and I'll never seem him again.

I ran deep into the woods…how deep I did not know. I kept going trying to remember the confusing path that led from my house to his. And then I tripped…over what I did not know…it was dark and I couldn't see. I fell onto the dirt hard and rolled next to a fallen tree. A scent I remembered rose from the wet earth around me. A sickly sweet scent that I remembered from the night James was killed. I turn my head dry heaving but nothing would come up. The ache of my heart and body caught up with me and I screamed in agony choking on the rain. I wanted it to drown me as I lay there crying. I cried until I couldn't cry anymore. My body shivered in the rain but I didn't have the strength or the will to move.

As much as I didn't want to admit it…I knew he was gone…and I had nothing to live for anymore..

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**A/N That was a really hard chapter for me to write...I've been dreading it since i started my story. I know you're all probably mad but keep in mind that this story is far from over and that its mirroring the actual saga just with some changes so stick with me people....I've got so many exciting things in store.**

**I'd really like reviews for this chapter because it was really emotionally draining for me...I actually cried while writing it. **

**Anyone see "Where the Wild Things Are"? I did and i loved it even though it was a really sad movie.**

**BTW: The title can be read as either a verb or a noun...either way it applies. I was gonna put this little note at the beginning but didn't want to give to much away.  
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	36. I Am Trying Very Hard To Be Here

**A/N Thanks for all the love on the last chapter. That as well as this one were very emotionally draining with me having to listen to sad music and read old diaries and stuff. It was worth it though. I hope you all enjoy this. **

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****I am Trying Very Hard to be Here**

**BPoV**

I felt as though I were floating cold and weightless through the air. A soft murmur of a voice spewing a stream of obscenities was all I could hear. I realized that I was being carried and my heart started pounding in my chest.

He had come back for me….

My eyes burned behind my eyelids but I forced them open anyway, seeing nothing but a cloud of black. Had I cried myself blind? No it was hair…black silky hair cascading over my face.

"What did that monster do to you Bella? I'll kill him for this."

I let out a painful audible groan when I realized it was not_ him_ carrying me. A part of my brain didn't care who it was but the other part instinctively tightened my grip around, what I realized was Jacobs's neck, andI buried my face in the comforting earthy scent of his hair. As we came out of the clearing into my backyard I peaked through his locks up at the sky. It was an odd pinkish color and I knew it was sometime in the early morning from the sound of the birds chirping. How long had I been out there?

"Thank God you found her Jacob!" I heard Charlie's strained voice as Jacob sprinted across the backyard. The next thing I knew I was being placed on the couch and within in seconds my wet clothes were being pulled from me replaced with a dry ones and a towel was ruffling through my hair. I had kept my eyes closed wishing for this all to be a dream. If I opened my eyes that would make me see this situation was real and I didn't want that. That would mean _he_ really was gone.

"Bella, look at me sweetie. Can you open your eyes? Look at me…its mommy honey look at me. Oh Charlie what's wrong with her? Why won't she look at me?"

"Bella…can you hear me…nod you head if you can hear me"

I honestly thought I did. I thought I had nodded at Charlie's request but apparently I didn't. I felt my head being pushed back against the couch and my eyes lids being pried open….someone was flashing a light into my eyes and throwing around words like "in shock" and "catatonic".

I could feel the flashlight holder inspecting my ankle. "It's re-broken…I'll have to re-set it. It'll hurt though in her state I doubt she'd feel it." Whoever was speaking was right. I didn't feel a thing. I was beyond numb. An arm wrapped around my shoulders needlessly restraining me as the doctor set to work. It was only then that I opened my eyes of my own accord and looked around at the sea of concerned faces: my dad, Jacob, a few deputies from Charlie's work, and finally my mothers pained blue eyes next to me.

"Bella where is Edward?" my mother asked. The sound of his name sent my mind whirling and the wind was knocked out of me. It was like she punched me right in the chest and my entire body tightened as I curled into a ball.

"Gone," was all I could manage. My voice was small and unfamiliar. It was hard to breathe and I felt like I was being sucked under some black void as I uttered the words for the first time realizing that they were in fact true.

"So you know?" came Charlie's questioning voice next. "Did he take you out there Bella? Did that bastard leave you out there?" His tone was acidic enough to make me want to respond. I looked up at my red-in-the-face fuming father and opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"Bella answer me! Did Edward leave you out there in the woods?" I cringed again at the sound of _his_ name.

"No. He….left me in…the house…I…followed him…out there…and fell…He didn't…know," I finally managed to get out. Jacob placed a mug of tea in front of my face and I recognized the mug as the same mug _he_ had brought up stairs that first night. I smacked his hand away, cringing like he was trying to hand me a poisonous snake.

"Okay…so you don't like tea…I'll remember that." Jacob said with a laughing tone.

"Charlie maybe we should take her in…keep her under observation for the night?" the doctor person said. I whipped my head around and glared at him. I was not stepping foot in that hospital.

"NO!" I shouted with as much force as I could which wasn't much. I still couldn't breathe.

"Bella, be reasonable…let Dr. Gerandy take you in. You could be hypothermic or something."

"No." I said again a little more forcefully. "My bed…I just want my bed." I looked up at Dr. Gerandy with pleading eyes. He nodded his head at me and then turned back to Charlie motioning for him to follow out in the hall. Renee stroked the side of my face cooing softly trying to calm me. I hadn't realized I was shivering until Jacob brought the afghan down from the back of the couch and wrapped it around my shoulders.

"Tell me what happened out there Bella. Where did he go?" I shook my head not wanting to even think about the fact that… I had no idea. Jacob grabbed my face and his hands stung my cheeks where they lay. I withdrew from his touch but he held fast to me forcing me to stare into his eyes. He stared back for a moment and then moved the blanket from my shoulders turning my head side to side. Then he pushed my sleeves up and inspected my arms and legs. My mother was sitting right next to us staring at him in horror but I didn't care. I just wanted to lie down and never move again.

"Um…Jacob what are you looking for?" she finally asked him sound a little worried. I watched him through narrowed eyes as he looked up at her with an innocent smile and replied, "You know scratches and stuff. I found her out in the dirt. She could get an infection or something."

Charlie came back into the room sans doctor and thanked everyone for coming. Once he led them all to the door he came back and collapsed in the chair beside us. "The doctor says you're alert enough that he doesn't have to take you in. We're all exhausted so Jake you can stay here tonight, the couch is yours. Renee you're welcome to my room. Let's get Bella into bed and deal with this later."

Renee nodded as she stood up trying to pull me to my feet but I had not the strength to move. My gaze shifted down to the couch where just hours ago I had been wrapped in _his_ arms and I lost it again. All the air was expelled from my body in one gasping cry. Jacob gathered me up in his arms carrying me up the stairs to my room. From the corner of my eye I saw his face scrunch up as he laid me on my bed and kneeled at my side. I lay on my side and stared at his face as he stroked my hands and hair.

"Have you been hurt? Did he hurt you?" I felt like screaming at him. Of course he didn't hurt me, I wanted to yell, aside from ripping out my heart. No, of course not.

"No," I sighed out instead.

"I knew something like this would happen Bella. I told you he was dangerous. I told you that he would end up hurting you. Why didn't you listen to me?" I wasn't in any mood for this. All I wanted was for what ever the black void I felt that was creeping up on to just take over. Dark couldn't come soon enough for me. I wanted to see and hear and feel nothing…because what I was feeling at the moment was beyond explanation. The pain I was feeling was worse than the burning pain of the venom and this time I did not have _him _to comfort me. I rolled over turning my back to Jacob and stared at the opposite wall hoping he would take the hint and just go away.

I barely heard his footsteps before my door clicked shut and with one last intake of breathe I screamed in agony. Gone…gone…gone…he was gone. I thought I had cried myself out in the woods, but now that I had admitted it out loud that _he_ was gone, a fresh wave of stinging tears flowed from my eyes and violent sobs wracked through my body.

At some point I suppose I had fallen asleep. Renee came in offering me food but I silently refused. I lay statue still staring up at my ceiling, going in and of sleep as Charlie, and then to my surprise Jacob, took turns coming in trying to get me to eat. Eventually they let me alone. At the end of the week Charlie and Renee came quietly into my room with suitcases. I was confused for a moment until they started whispering about plane tickets and packing.

"What are you doing?" I croaked out. My throat was dry and it felt like I was swallowing razors. I hadn't spoken in days.

"Oh, Bella honey, did we wake you? I'm sorry sweetheart. Lie back down. We'll wake you when its time to go."

Time to go? Time to go… go…go…gone…The word ripped painfully through me and I collapsed back onto my bed holding myself together.

"What do you mean go?" I panted out.

"Bella honey…you're dad and I think it would be best if you came back to Jacksonville with me." I started to shake as the only emotion I had allowed myself to feel besides sorrow flooded my brain. Anger ran hot through my veins as I shot up ripping the clothes from my mother's hands.

"I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!" I screamed at them both knocking the suitcase and its contents onto the floor.

"Bella, now calm down okay. You haven't eaten anything in a week. You've barely left this room. This can't go on much longer. You've gotta get yourself back together honey and being here with all the memories and everything…well I don't think it's gonna help you. Trust me I know." Charlie's voice cracked at the end of his sentence as he glanced at Renee and back at me.

"No. Dad no. You can't make me go. I won't go."

"Bella staying here isn't gonna help you. You need a change of scenery. Jacksonville will be good for you. You can come home for Christmas if you feel up to it."

"No."

"Bella."

"No! What if he comes back? If he changes his mind this is this first place he'll go. If I'm not here he won't be able to find me. I'm. Not. Moving."

"Bella, Edward Cullen is gone. He isn't coming back. I've been to the house. They are all gone. Carlisle got a job at some fancy hospital…they aren't coming back." I was at this pointed blind by rage. I picked up the closet thing to me, the clock of my nightstand, and chucked it at the wall.

"I SAID IM NOT GOING ANYWHERE AND I MEANT IT. GET OUT!"

I picked up the lamp and threw that too. I screamed as the tears flowed from my eyes and I picked whatever was within my reach and threw it so they would just leave. Charlie attempted to restrain me but I thrashed in his arms and pushed him off.

"Damnitt Bella. Calm down!" Charlie grabbed at me again this time pinning me to the bed. I thrashed beneath him as Renee came at me with a needle jamming it into my thigh. I silently thanked the lord that she had gone to nursing school and didn't even have time to ask what she had given me before my head went foggy and I was being dragged to the top of my bed.

"Fine Bella, if you want to stay then stay. But I'm warning you. You have a week until school starts and your going…every single day. If you're grades start slipping…if you don't come out of this by then…I putting your butt on the first plane to Jacksonville…you can kick and scream all you want but you're going. Even if I have to drug you to get you there!" My door slammed and all I heard was my mother whimpering as she cleaned up the mess from my tantrum before I went under.

**September**

The broken clock was a comfort. It helped me sleep at night. Because of it I didn't count the seconds that had passed without _him._ Charlie never mentioned my outburst and neither did I. I barely spoke at all. I was barely alive, functioning on autopilot, as I moved through the house and then when school started through the halls. The first few days Angela had attempted to comfort me but at finding me unresponsive, she resolved to sitting by me and occasionally rubbing my back when someone's mentioning _his_ name, any of their names, had sent me doubling over gasping for air.

The pain medication Dr. Gerandy had put me on for my ankle had given me the gift of dreamless sleep but it did nothing to ease the pain of the gaping hole in my chest that used to be my heart. Charlie eventually realized it was a good idea to stop questioning me about what happened when Jacob, who at cemented himself as a semi-permanent fixture in the house, pointed out that the mere mention of _him_ practically killed me. I was grateful of that, although it was hard to hide my irritation at him always being there. I didn't like the feeling of being watched. I wanted to wallow in peace but he was always there offering some joke or "comforting" word trying to make me "feel better".

Nothing in the world would make me feel better unless _he_ returned. I held onto to the belief that _he_ would realize how much _he_ loved me and would come back. I had to believe that.

**October**

The leaves on the trees had all turned orange and brown. I hobbled through the woods searching for something I knew I wouldn't find, but something that I knew I had to keep looking for. I had wandered so deep in that I could no longer see the sky through the thick trees; therefore I didn't know that it was pitch-black out.

Great. Just what I need. Lost in the woods again.

I attempted to double back from where I came. It started to get cold and the wind chilled my bones through the thin jacket I had stupidly taken with me on my little adventure. What was I think coming out here by myself? Maybe I didn't have a sense of self-preservation as _he_ had said to me so many times. Just the thought of_ him_ sent me doubling over in pain and I panted trying to catch my breath as I clutched my mid-section.

Keep it together. Just get home. You can try again tomorrow.

I pressed on noticing, much to my dismay, that the moss covered fallen tree I was looking at, I had just passed. The wind blew this time stopping the air in my lungs. It seemed to whisper my name and I heard a faint familiar laugh coming from somewhere in the distance. I whirled straining my eyes searching for the source. There was nothing there.

I really didn't want to be out here anymore.

Suddenly there was a gust of wind blowing past me so fast that it knocked me on my ass. I scooted back against the tree, my chest heaving, and then I saw _him._ _He_ stood there between two trees, with his back turned to me, glancing over his shoulder. I reached out my hand and _he_ smiled my favorite half smile before disappearing. I jumped up whirling again and there _he_ was in another spot, smiling and reaching for me.

"Bella…My Bella."

_His_ velvet voice traveled on the wind, encircling me and I ran to him with tears streaming down my face.

"I knew you would come back. I knew you would." I said holding my arms wide open to him.

He flashed in front of me throwing his arms around and burying his face in my neck. Tears streamed down my faces as I ran my fingers through his hair and down his neck and over his shoulders.

"Oh Bella…my Bella…I've missed you so much", _he_ whispered into my neck. I pressed myself against him eager to feel that he was really here in my arms. He started to growl and I froze when he broke free from my embrace and stepped away.I watched in anguish as his lips pulled back over his teeth and his eyes turned blacker than I had ever seen them. _He_ snarled and shrank away from me covering his nose with one hand and pointing at me with the other. I lifted my hands to him and saw what he was pointing at. The moonlight illuminated the blood that covered my hands. I looked from them to him and back to my hands, patting myself to see where it was coming from, when I saw the deep red stain over the left side of my shirt where my heart would be.

"Edward!" I screamed out but he turned his back and stalked off. I called after him running and then he started to run and I knew I would never catch him. I tripped landing face first in the dirt and when I looked up he was gone and I screamed.

The scream sent me bolting up in my bed clutching the sheets. Charlie rushed into the room throwing his arms around me.

"Bella, Bella what's the matter honey what's wrong?"

I buried my face in shoulder as he rocked me. "Shhh baby, shhhh its okay. I'm here Bella. I'm here. Its okay it was just a bad dream. It was just a night mare."

And that's how it was after they had taken my pain meds away. Every night I cried myself to sleep. _He_ haunted as scent on my pillow. _His_ scent lingered everywhere I looked and I couldn't escape it. Every night I had a new nightmare that woke me up screaming. Sometimes the dreams weren't frightening. Sometimes the dreams were memories replaying in my head. Memories of times we had spent together. Memories of times we had touched and kissed and whispered I love you. Memories I spent my every conscious thought trying to keep locked away. Those were the worst ones. Those were the ones that sent me rushing to the bathroom dry heaving.

The month passed in a blur. One long day followed by one long night that was the same over and over. Except for my birthday. Jacob had surprised me by filling the house with balloons and baking me a giant chocolate cake (which he ate most of). Charlie came in with the mail, his face red and eyes almost bulging out of his head.

"What is it dad? Is there something for me in there?" I asked him, locking my eyes on his face. Charlie had no better ability to lie than I had.

"No, well, yes but just from your Mom and Phil. That's it." He answered quickly handing me the small package but my eyes were locked on the large ivory envelope he was holding under his arm. My mind could have been playing tricks on my but I thought I smelled warm vanilla and brown sugar….a scent that I knew and again left me breathless.

Alice.

"What…is…that?" I asked him pointing at the envelope.

"Oh this? Nothing. Its junk mail" He tossed it into the fireplace before I could even get out to my chair. That night I dreamt of her.

By the end of the month Charlie had stopped running into my room to console me. He had stopped coming in the bathroom to hold my hair and rub my back as I vomited. The teachers at school had stopped calling on me and well the only people who still spoke to me were Angela and Jacob. Jacob who still hadn't taken the hint that I was in no mood for his antics.

**November**

So the saying says that time heals all wounds but this was one time did nothing for. The absence of __ was apparent everywhere I looked. It was apparent in the painful gaping hole in my chest. It was apparent in the hollow feeling in my stomach. I had somehow managed to lock the thoughts away. I didn't allow myself to think of the name or the face or the voice until I was in the confines of my own home and eventually my closet. I would curl in a ball on the floor and cry and scream until I was exhausted then drag myself to bed and hope that I wore myself out enough that the dreams wouldn't come. It rarely worked but it was all I had.

Jacob stuck around, never seeming to mind that I rarely spoke. When I did it wasn't much more than a whisper. He would come and sit with Charlie, sometimes Billy would come as well, but I barely noticed. I spent the majority of my time at home sitting in the one spot __ had never sat in buried in my books. The only plus from this situation was that my grades had gone up exponentially

Nothing seemed to be able to make the dreams stop and I stopped looking for ways. It didn't help that I hadn't been able to kick the nasty habit of still reaching for __ when I woke up and I spent the first half-hour of everyday silently crying.

**December**

Time may not heal all wounds but its does help you deal with them. The dreams still continued but they didn't wake me up anymore. I fought and cried through them and woke up to a tear-soaked pillow.

I sat at the kitchen table one morning pushing cereal around in a bowl when Charlie slammed his hand down on the table so hard the bowl wobbled splashing milk and corn pops everywhere.

"Damnitt Bella that's it. At the end of this semester you're going to Jacksonville." My eyes flickered up to his face quickly and placed the spoon down next to the bowl.

"Why? My grades are better then they've ever been. I've haven't missed a day of school. What reason do you have to send me away? I haven't done anything."

"That's the problem Bella. You haven't done a damn thing. You're like a zombie. Jake's here almost everyday and you barely speak to him."

"I don't ask him to come. Tell him to stop. I don't want to talk."

"I told you that you had better come out of this. I know what you're doing and I think it's stupid. It's been months Bella and you haven't heard a word from Edward or any of the other Cullen's for that matter."

The sound of his name ripped me wide open. I hid my trembling hands underneath me and lowered my eyes so Charlie wouldn't see the tears.

"I'm not waiting for h…I'm not waiting." I lied. "It's the middle of my senior year. You can't expect me to leave in the middle of my senior year. That's ridiculous."

Charlie slammed the paper down and pushed away from the table. "No Bella. You're being ridiculous. You're not the only person who's ever been broken up with you know. I got divorced and got over it….you should be able to get over this."

"Did you? Did you really?" I asked him, remembering the wedding photo he still had hung up in his bedroom.

"Bella…we...we're…we're not talking about me. We're talking about you." He stammered out.

"You're right dad. We are talking about me. But if you're gonna use yourself as an example then you can't expect me to learn anything if you're just as guilty as me. I'm not going to Jacksonville so stop threatening me. You want me to go out? I'll go out. You want me to prance around here like I'm fine? Fine then I'll do it. I'll put on a tutu and everything." My bottom lips was trembling and I bit down on it to keep the cry that was building up from coming out.

"I don't meant to be rough on you kid, but you look at you. I say his name once and you can't even sit up straight. I'm worried about you. This isn't healthy and you know I just want what's best for you"

I hadn't noticed that I had wrapped my arms around myself and was leant over until I realized the pattern that was dizzying me was my kitchen floor. I stood up slowly so as not to crack and placed the bowl in the sink.

"I know Dad. But I want you to know that I am trying. It's hard but I'm trying. Let me get where you are in peace please. Threatening to send me away isn't helping. It's hurting. It feels like you don't want to be around me either." Charlie closed the space between us in on step wrapping his arms around me.

"Don't think that Bells. Of course I want you to stay. I just want to see you smile again. I just want to see you happy and healthy again. I'm sorry. I'm here….if you wanna talk I'll listen." I shook my head against his chest noticing that although I knew my father was warm…I still felt cold. Just as we pulled apart Jacob came in through the front door wiping his greasy hands on a rag that was hanging from his front pocket.

"Hey Charlie. Hey Bella. Got those oil changes done for you and I put some chains on Bella's tires so she won't slip in the snow." He smiled at me and it was the first time in months I was actually face to face with him. There was a certain glitter in eye that kind of mesmerized me and as we made eyes contact his lips widened into a smile. I felt the corners of my mouth twitch and then the foreign sensation of my own smile.

"There she is! I knew it was only a matter of time before she'd come out of it. Corn pops? Was that the trick?" Jacob said picking up the box and shaking it. I couldn't help but laugh a little and Charlie stared at me wide eyed clutching his heart.

"My God Jake what ever it is that you're doing keep doing it. She's alive! She's alive!" he said mockingly throwing up his hands. My cheeks started to burn a little and I knew if I hadn't been so dead the past few months I would have had a full on blush.

"Stop it you guys." I moved to wipe the milk from the table but Charlie beat me to it.

"Quick Jake…take advantage of this once in a life time opportunity and get her out here" Jacob smiled wide again with a hint of mischief in his eyes before he rushed at me and threw me over his shoulders.

"Jacob put me down right now." I screamed but he didn't listen.

"Not a chance Bell's. You picked the perfect day to come back to life. You're coming down to La Push with me for a winter Pow Wow. Let' the wild Rumpus Begin!" Jacob ran to the door faster than I would have thought he could and grabbed my boots and jacket before stomping out the door. I looked with embarrassment at the fact that my ass wasn't even 3 inches away from Jacob's face, at Charlie who was waving from the front door.

"Have fun kids! Be careful. If it gets to late just call and stay down at Jakes tonight."

Once we were in the car Jacob cranked the heat up in my truck until it was blaring in my face. I put my hands out in front of it but felt nothing.

"So….pow wow hunh? Does that mean you're gonna wear straw skirts and feathers?" I asked looking up at him from the corner of my eye. He flashed a smile down at me as wide as his face and chuckled.

"I'm not but some people will."

"Is this like a ceremony or something?"

"Used to be but now its more like a big party."

"Don't worry," he said smiling at me again. "You'll have a great time…if you let yourself."

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**A/N I hope you all enjoyed that chapter. It was hard to write but still fun. **

**I just wanted to express my appreciation for everyone thats reading and even more to those that take the time leave me a review. It means alot to me and I love you guys for the nice things that you say. It really warms my heart.**

**So thanks so much.  
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	37. Delirium Trigger

**A/N I just wanted to thank everyone for their continued support. It means the world to me. I hope you enjoy this next installment.**

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**Delirium Trigger**

**EPoV**

One of the best things about being a vampire is that you can sit in the same position for hours and it wouldn't bother you. This also means that you can stand out side a door and knock for four hours and never get tired.

" Stop knocking on my damn door Alice. I'm not going to open it."

"Edward, you might as well. It's not like I can't just pull if off the hinges. I just don't want Esme yelling again. Stop being a baby and open the damn door!"

"I'm naked."

"Liar…You're sitting in the damn corner like you've been doing for the past three days. I need to tell you something anyways so just let me in."

I got up slowly and opened the door. The light from the hall irritated my eyes a little bit after sitting in the dark for three days. Alice ducked past me and sat in the only chair in the room which she had brought in when we first moved here.

"You know Esme is still upset with you. She doesn't think you're eating enough. I know you're still punishing yourself…I would be too if it didn't hurt Jasper so much….but you have to eat. You know so you don't end up going all crazy and killing someone. Then you'd really feel like shit…and then your bloodlust would mess up Jaspers control and I soooo do not want to have to deal with two blood crazed vampires on my hands."

Sometimes I wished she needed to take a breath to speak.

"Did you come in here to lecture me or do you actually have something useful to tell me?"

"Um…yea I did…I do…Tanya is in Spain. She's been there for a while. I wanted to wait it out…see if she moves again. Shall I book tickets?"

I felt flickers of anger igniting in me. I still wanted to rip her head off, but she was in another country and I had promised Rose that I wouldn't go after her unless she came back to the states.

"No. Leave her. She far enough away from….She's safe. That's all that matters. Tanya can't get to her where she is. Don't do anything unless you see reason to."

"Well see that's what I want to talk to you about. See, if you think she's safe…then that means we can go back."

"Alice…Get out."

"Edward….come on…Look at you…you're miserable and so is Bella."

Just the sound of her name had me in pain but when Alice showed me memories of her flashes of Bella crying…being held down and sedated…waking up in the middle of the night screaming…it was too much. I sank to the floor and cried out in pain.

"Damnitt Alice! Stop!" Jasper called from downstairs sounding almost as strained as I was. Alice's thoughts turned to Bella laughing and smiling at me which was equally painful.

"Alice…please stop. I already told you. Bella belongs in fairytales that I could never be. I didn't leave because of Tanya…I left because of me…because I of what I am. Please stop doing that to me."

Alice crawled over wrapping her arms around my back and hugging me. "I'm sorry Edward. You know why I do it. I miss her too. We all do. You need to go back Edward. You two belong together. There's no reason for you to be miserable. I told you along time ago…you deserve to be happy too."

"There is a reason Alice."

"Oh yea…and what's that?"

"So she can live."

**BPoV**

I felt the gravity of Jacob's words. It wasn't like I was choosing to be miserable. I wasn't bleeding on the ballroom floor just for attention. If I could be happy I would be. _He _would be with me and the sun would shine again.

We arrived down at La Push and parked down at Jacob's house.

"Wait here for a minute okay. I'm just gonna go get my dad and we'll head down." Jacob disappeared into the house and my thoughts crept back to the last time I had been here. It seemed a lifetime ago. Tears started to well in my eyes as I thought back over the nightmare I had the night before. I was sitting in an unfamiliar living room surrounded by 7 people that I knew were _them_ but their faces…when they looked at me, were gone. I couldn't match a face to body and I woke up screaming into my pillow for the first time in a long time. I didn't want to admit it…but the mental strains on my brain of my trying not remember…really was causing me to forget.

"Hey Bella? You in there? You're not gonna go all space case on me again are you?"

Jacob's words snapped me out of my thoughts and the brightness in his eyes made me gasp.

"Yea I'm fine. Where to now?" I asked him holding my passenger door open for Billy and then noticed he hadn't left the lawn. Jacob pointed to the wooded area off to the side of his house and I gulped.

"It's okay. There's nothing to trip on. I had to clear the space for my dad. It's a clear path until we get to the hill. Think you can handle the chair? I've got to carry my dad down…unless you want to." He smiled and bumped his shoulder against mine causing me to stumble and fall into the door of my truck.

"Sorry…sometimes I forget how strong I am." he said flexing his muscles. His much toned muscles, which I could now see were threatening to burst out of his tight black t-shirt.

"Well come on kids lets get goin!" Billy called over his shoulder. I followed Jake listening while he explained where we where going and what we were going to do. Finally we got to the very steep hill Jake warned me about and I watched in awe as he lifted Billy out of the chair with ease and sprinted down the hill. It didn't even seem like he was watching where he was going. Once he got to the bottom he turned back and noticed I hadn't moved yet.

"Uh…you coming Bells?"

"Jacob, breaking my neck wasn't exactly on my list of things to do today. Is there another way down? I'm not running down this hill." He laughed and sprinted back up the hill holding his hand out for me.

"Here…I'll help you down." I slipped my hand awkwardly into his but quickly pulled it back out. A bolt of electricity shot up my arm and into my brain and I shook.

"You okay Bella? I'll take you back up to the house if you're not feeling up to this…maybe we shouldn't be pushing you so much." His voice and eyes were so full of concern that I felt like ass for actually contemplating his offer.

"No it's okay. I'm just…I'm fine. Let's go." Jacob smiled and pulled me up into his arms and carried me and the chair down the hill. I was grateful at not having to walk down but still a little embarrassed.

"Makes you feel like a baby again doesn't it?" Billy joked easing himself back into his chair.

I laughed nervously and followed behind them. I could hear people talking and laughing. We walked into a clearing where it seemed the whole reservation had gathered around a bonfire. Billy wheeled himself to a group of older people and I followed Jacob to a group of very large Native American boys that all seemed to be dressed in black t-shirts and jeans just like Jacob. The biggest one stepped up to Jacob and embraced him.

"Haćh tòchktiya (good afternoon) Jacob."

"Haćh tòchķtiya Sam. Bella this is Sam. Sam, Bella." I held out my hand to this Sam character but he just crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at me.

"So you're Bella hunh?" The tone in his voice was as if I had kicked his dog and I immediately disliked him.

"Last time I checked." I spat back at him. He glared at me taking a step forward but Jacob stepped in between us.

"Cool it Sam," Jacob barked at him and his glare went from my face to Jacobs.

What the hell was this guy's problem?

"We'll talk about his later Jacob" he said back and stalked off. A few of the guys from the group followed behind him as if he were some sort of God. All that was left were two guys that I vaguely remembered being friends of Jacobs when we were younger.

"Remember us Bella. Quil and Embry?" Quil asked motioning between him and the other guy.

"Yea sort of." I answered back.

"It's been a while hunh…you look um…Well how's everything?" My mouth fell agape and Jacob punched him in the arm.

"Dude weren't you supposed to work on that whole sensitivity thing? Bella you look fine. Quil's just an ass." Embry started laughing and Quil turned and punched him in the arm. The two of them started wrestling and I cracked a smile when I heard Jacobs laugh. It was almost a girlish giggle.

"Sorry Bella. Boys will be boys. You hungry because I am…lets go eat." Jacob put his arm over my shoulders turning me away from the brawling boys on the ground and called over his shoulder. "You guys coming. We're gonna go eat."

At the word eat Quill and Embry both popped their heads up and jumped to their feet. We walked over to the large tables that were covered with all kinds of food. Jacob shoved a paper plate in my hand and piled food into his three plates and my one. The four of us sat around the bonfire and I picked at my food while I watch the three boys devour plate after plate. Suddenly there was a loud melodic beating of drums coming from behind me and the sound of feet stomping on the ground. I turned to see a group of people dressed in brightly colored costumes dancing up followed by the drummers.

"The ceremony's beginning. You're really gonna enjoy this Bells," Jacob said to me smiling. Billy wheeled up to the side of us and everyone gathered round the fire. The procession broke through the circle and began dancing around the fire. I watched as everyone started to link hands and then felt Jacob and Quill's warm hands covering mine. They pulled me up and we started to sway with the crowd and the music. The sound of the drums and the flutes started to get to me, I felt as if my spirit were being lifted up…like for the moment I was coming alive again. I found myself chanting along with them and when the finale came and everyone threw their hands up in the air mine went up with them.

When it was all over I san back on to the log feeling winded but more alive than I had felt in months. My chest was heaving and Jacobs heavy hand rubbed circles on my back as him and his friends laughed at me. He knelt down at my side and lifted my face to his.

"I told you it was incredible didn't I?"

"Yeah that really was something Jake. Why haven't you ever brought me to one of these before?"

"These ceremonies are supposed to lift our spirits Bella, help us get through the changing of the seasons. This is the first time you've needed it." He smiled from ear to ear and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Okay now make out!" Quill said from behind me and Jake's arm shot passed me and grabbed his ankle sending him falling backwards over the log.

"Damn Jake, I was just kidding."

"Yea well stop being an ass okay!"

"Geez I'm sorry. I'm sorry Bella. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable"

I could feel blood rushing to my face. The feeling was amazing.

"It's okay Quill…some of us never grow up." I answered back. I was expecting them to laugh but they just looked at each other sideways and then down at the ground.

"Uh…yea so now that um...this parts all over we should get to the real party." Jacob said breaking the uncomfortable silence.

"Real party?"

"Yea. You didn't think this was it did you? We have our own little celebration up at Sam and Emily's house."

"I don't think you're friend Sam like me very much Jake. Maybe I should skip that part."

It didn't matter what I said because he was already pulling me in the direction of the hill. Before I could protest further Jacob grabbed me into his arms and sprinted back up the hill. Quill and Embry followed right behind him. We ran all the way to Sam's house with me in Jacobs arms,

"You know Jake, I can walk." I said when he finally put me down.

"Yea but I'd have to fight with you to get you to come here and it was faster this way. You walk slow."

I laughed and shoved him but it was like trying to push a brick wall. I followed the three of them to the back of Sam's house where Christmas lights were strung up every illuminating the backyard. There was a small table with a bucket of ice and beer bottles in it surrounded by fried chicken, ears of corn and a large bowl of potato salad. I couldn't believe it but the three of them went directly over to the table and grabbed plates of food. I couldn't believe they were still hungry.

"Jesus you eat a lot Jacob." I said sitting down next to him. I suddenly felt out of place being surrounded by all of Sam's friends. The fact that they were all dressed alike was starting to freak me out too.

"Men grow until they turn 21 Bella. I'm just trying to get big and strong and eat all my vegetables like my daddy says." he answered back in a childish voice licking potato salad off his fork.

Embry walked over and shoving a bud light bottle in my face. "Want one Bella. They're really cold. See the mountains are blue."

Jacob snatched the bottle out of his hand glaring at him. "I'll take that, thank you." He twisted the top of the bottle off with this arm and downed half of it within seconds.

Embry sat down at my across from us and started blabbing about something. I wasn't really paying attention. I was to busy staring at Jacob. I felt weird….nervous almost. I couldn't tell what it was but had this strange feeling that something was just off. The wind started to blow chilling me through my coat and it hit me. It was December. It was freezing out and snow on the ground and none off these guys had on so much as a sweater.

"Jacob, why aren't any of you wearing coats?" I asked him in a monotone voice. I felt the three of them stare at me for a moment and then turned my eyes to Jacob's face.

"I'm not cold Bella. They don't call us red-blooded Indians for nothing." He joked and smiled. But I recognized that smile. I had seen that smile before on another face. He was lying.

"Jacob its December. None of you are wearing coats. That's…That's…weird."

"Bella…its' not a big deal. We're just used to the weather that's all."

"Jacob that's bullshit. I'm sure Eskimos are used to the cold but they still wear coats."

"Yea like us not wearing coats in the middle of the winter is the weirdest thing you've ever seen," came Sam's booming voice from behind me.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I said turning to him.

"Oh, like you don't know."

"Not now Sam. I don't think she's ready." Jacob said standing up in front of me.

"Jacob…we've waited long enough. You've had your time and you've gotten nothing out of her. If you won't make her talk than we will." Sams' hand shot past Jacob and grabbed my wrist yanking me out of the chair.

"Let go of me you asshole," I yelled at him trying to pull away. His grasp on me was too tight and it was literally burning my arm. Jacob grabbed my other arm and pulled me away from him.

"Don't touch her Sam," he said through gritted teeth.

"What the hell is going on here Jacob? Why did you bring me here?" I asked him.

"Bella…listen I'm sorry. I didn't know Sam was gonna act like this. He said he just wanted to talk to you. I told him I would let him know when I thought you were ready," he said to me and then turned to Sam. "And I don't think she's ready. I'm gonna take her home Sam. If she tells me anything you'll be the first to know…but I'm telling you she doesn't know anything. "

"Jacob, you're being an idiot. Why don't you just ask her now…in front of all of us. This way we can see for ourselves.

"No Sam. She's not ready."

My mind was reeling as I watched them argue.

"Not ready for what? What the hell are you guys talking about? What are you supposed to be asking me Jacob?" I shouted at them.

"Nothing Bella. Never mind lets just go." Jacob answered grabbing my hand. I yanked my hand away and looked at Sam.

"What is it that you could possibly want to ask me?"

"We want to know what happened that night Edward Cullen attacked you. We want to know how you got away. We want to know everything you know."

I stared at him for a moment and then it was as if the earth turned sideways. I started falling backwards but Jacob caught me and eased me back into the chair. I gripped onto his arm trying to hold myself upright but Edwards name was banging around in my head.

Edward Cullen…Edward Cullen…Edward Cullen….over and over and over again. Jacob and Sam were arguing again but every word out of their mouths sounded like Edward Cullen. I felt like I had tunnel vision and my eyes zeroed in on Sams mouth. He pushed Jacob out of the way and sent him falling to the ground and grabbed my arms pulling me up out other chair.

"Tell me what happened the night Edward Cullen tried to kill you Bella. Tell me what you did to get away," he screamed in my face. His words replayed in my head once and when I reheard _Edward Cullen tried to kill you_ I snapped. I used all the strength I had to push him off me and ignored the burning tears that were running down my face.

"What the fuck are you talking about? Edward Cullen did not try to kill me. I told Jacob what happened. He left me at my house and I followed him out into the woods. He didn't know I was there. If he did he would have come back for me. Why does it matter to you anyway?"

"This is ridiculous. Why are you still covering for that monster? Are you that much of an idiot? He attacked you. You could have died."

"I just said he didn't attack me. What are you talking about? Edward would never intentionally hurt me. He…he… loved me."

Sam rolled his eyes and laughed in my face. "The bloodsucker loved you? Are you kidding me? You must be delusional. Those monsters don't know what love is. You're more of a moron that I thought you were Swan. It's too bad they didn't kill you. That would have given us an excuse to get rid of the fucking leeches."

I started at him in shock. He called them bloodsuckers…leeches….Did he….does he….could he possibly know?

"Why…why are you calling them that Sam?"

"Don't play stupid with me Swan. You know full well why I'm calling them that." He motioned to the crowd of guys around him then at Jacob. "We all know."

"Know what? What do you know? Say it! Tell me what you think you know about the Cullens you bastard."

"That they are evil bloodsucking murderous vampires. They are abominations and deserve to fucking die…or whatever it is that they do." My body reacted faster than my mind and before I knew it I had reached up and slapped Sam in the face. He lunged at me but Jacob grabbed me out of the way tossing me on the ground behind him.

"How dare you say that about them you asshole." I said picking myself up. "You're ridiculous if you could think something so absurd. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life."

"See I told you she doesn't know anything Sam." Jacob said to him still standing between us.

"They aren't evil or murderous. You don't know the first thing about them. I'm more afraid of you right now than I ever been of any of them. Jacob get me out of here. I want to go home." I grabbed his hand but he pulled it away and turned to face me.

"Wait a minute Bella. You knew. I'm mean you know what they are?" He yelled with an incredulous look on his face.

"Of course I know Jacob. The real question is….how the hell do you know. How the hell do any of you know anything about them?"

We narrowed our eyes at each other in an awkward standoff.

"Bella. That's really sick."

"Fuck you Jacob." I pushed past him and ran from the backyard. The wind started to pick up stopping the air in my chest as I stumbled down the street. I stopped at the corner realizing I had no idea how to get to Jacobs house but I was not going back to Sam's. As I stood there contemplating which way to go I felt tears running down my face. I leaned against a tree trying to regain my composure. I felt like I was starting to crumple when I felt a strong hand on my shoulder.

"Bella we need to talk." I looked up into Jacob's angry eyes and turned away.

"No we don't."

"Yes we do Bella. You owe me an explanation."

"I don't owe you anything Jacob. If anyone deserves an explanation it's me. But at this point I don't even care. I just want to go home. I just want to go home and never ever come back here."

Jacob sighed and pulled me away from the tree. I followed him home in silence. It started to snow…heavily. He didn't so much as shiver.

"Bella, you have to stay here tonight," he finally said when we got back to his house. "It's snowing too hard and it's too dangerous to drive."

I looked out the window prepared to protest but realized he was right. Jacob sat on the couch twirling a bottle of Jack Daniels that was on the coffee table while I attempted to thaw myself in front of the fireplace. He poured the brown liquid in a tumbler and handed it to me than poured one for himself. It burned in my chest as I drank it down but the after effect was worth it. I relaxed a little and after the fourth drink I knew I was drunk.

"Jacob…what's going on? How do you know about them?" I finally asked him in my drunken stupor sinking into a chair.

"They were caught hunting on our land. We made a deal that if they stayed off our land and kept their disgusting fangs off everyone in town we wouldn't fight. We wouldn't kill them."

"Ha…You may be strong Jacob but I highly doubt you're strong enough to kill one of them. I've seen how strong they are. You'd get slaughtered."

Jacob laughed under his breath and answered me with no hint of a joke in his voice.

"We have our ways Bella."

I stared at him for a moment wondering what he meant. How…Jacob is human. How could he think he would stand a chance?

"How long did you know Bella? That night when he attacked you…is that how you found out?"

The hatred in his voice shook me to the core. I couldn't understand why they kept insisting he attacked me. That he would hurt me. Edward would never hurt me….He loved me…I knew he did…

Did….he did…maybe…I didn't even know anymore. I held to this fantasy that he would come back because he loved me. He would stop feeling guilty and come home because he couldn't be without me but it had been 4 months. Charlie was right.

"Jake, I don't know how to make you understand…he didn't attack me. For fucks sake…please don't remind me of that night. Please don't remind me of him leaving me." My body started to shake but I knew it wasn't from the cold. His name…memories…everything I had worked so hard not to think about was rattling around in my head. I clutched my stomach leaning over my knees. My knees were shaking uncontrollably so I pulled them up into the chair and wrapped my arms around my knees.

"Bella I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. We just want to know what happened. We want to…I want to protect you."

"I don't need protection Jacob. He isn't coming back." I whined out. I could feel my chest getting ready to explode and everything felt like it was spinning.

"Is that why you've been hanging around me Jacob? Because you think he's gonna come back and hurt me?"

I lifted my head up as Jacob came to kneel before me. He slowly pulled my legs down and moved between them then held my hands on my thighs.

"Well yea, in the beginning…I just wanted to be there in case he came back to you know finish you off. I couldn't let anything happen to you Bella, you're still my best friend. But now…Now that I see you…its…I don't know how to explain it Bella. I don't know how to explain how I feel about you." Jacob took my hand and placed it over his heart.

"Jacob…I…"

"Shhhh Bella, it's okay. I'll never let that bastard touch you again. Nothing and no one will ever ever hurt you on my watch. And if you'll let me Bella…I will try to fix you."

I didn't have the chance to respond. Jacob pulled me into him and crushed his lips to mine. His strong hands held my face in place and his lips moved over mine parting them. I struggled to pull away and he by the time he let me go I was gasping for air.

"That was better than I imagined it would be," he said resting his forehead against mine. I was stunned and couldn't speak. For the moment when his lips were pressed against mine it felts as if I were being thoroughly thawed but at the same time all I could think about is how it felt to kiss Edward. How his first kiss was gentle at first as I felt him breathing me in and then got deeper…more passionate. Edwards's first kiss set me afire. Jacobs…did not.

"I'm… I'm tired Jacob. I'll stay the night but I want to sleep now."

Jacob stood in front of me and led me to his bedroom. I thought he was going to stay with me and was nervous until he took a black t-shirt and shorts out his drawer and handed them to me.

"Here…so u don't have to sleep in your clothes. I'll take my dad's room. He won't be coming home in this." Jacob left the room glancing at me over his shoulder. I stumbled around changing feeling the effects of the liquor and the crawled into the bed in fetal position. I had expected the screams to burst out of me but it didn't happen. I expected the tears and the hysterics to happen – I had heard and said and heard his name to many times today, thought of him and that night and his kiss and everything to much, and now to top it off I had kissed someone else so I now felt guilty to boot – but it didn't happen. My head hit the pillow and 5 minutes later I was fast asleep.

It was the first night in 3 months I did not dream of Edward Cullen or any of the Cullens.

It was the first time in 3 grueling months that I didn't dream of anything at all.

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**A/N So here's how dedicated i am. I actually looked up how to speak the language. It was hard and i could only find a few phrases. There's only like 13 people that still speak the language, okay I'm exaggerating but u get the point.**

**Anyways i hope you all enjoyed this chapter. And as someone pointed out yes i am following the actual books...sort of as i have said many times but obviously you can see there are many changes. I will continue to follow the actual saga...some what....i dont want to take you guys to far from home but everything will be done my way and for different reasons. So if you're enjoying my story thank you and please keep reading... If not I'm sorry to waste you time.**

**New Moon in a week...Who's excited? I know I am... It come out the day after my birthday...who could ask for a better gift?  
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	38. Medicate

**A/N So...yea....I am so sorry about the ridiculously long wait for the update...but as most of you may know it's the winding down of the semester so things are kind of hectic plus i have like Swan flu or something to boot. Swan Flu...not Swine...its not as bad but it still sucks. Lol...anyways...i hope you enjoy this...its a filler chapter that sets things up for the next one....i tried to add some humor....and some depth to one of the characters for later use...okay I'm rambling...go read...enjoy....**

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****Medicate**

**BPoV**

I snuck out of Jacobs's house quietly and prayed that he wouldn't hear my monster of a car start. The night before had been too weird, too much for me to take in all at once and I needed to just get home and think.

Jacob obviously had feelings for me. He had kissed me. And I didn't know what to do about it.

I stared straight ahead, pushing my engine has hard as it would go when Sam stepped out into the street. My breath hitched in my lungs and I swerved out of the way stopping just before my truck hit a tree. Sam ran over and yanked the door open pulling me out of the truck. I screamed but he clamped his hand over my mouth pushing me against the truck.

"Stop screaming. Do you want to wake up the whole neighborhood?" he asked with a wild look on his face.

"What do you want Sam?" I asked when he let me go.

"You know what I want."

"No I really don't. I really don't know what you are expecting me to tell you."

"About those filthy bloodsuckers you love so much in case they come back. It was different before…when they weren't attacking people. Now that they are we need to know what they can do."

"Sam…He didn't attack me. None of them have ever attacked me. I already told you this."

"Then who did they kill?"

"What do you mean?"

"We know that they killed one of their kind. We know that one of them came onto the Rez. Now tell me what the hell was going on!"

I stared into Sam's face for a moment. I could the anger coming off of him in waves. He crossed his arms and tapped his foot impatiently, waiting for me to respond but I didn't know what to tell secrets weren't mine to tell and no matter what...I would never betray them.

"Sam it doesn't matter anymore. Trust me. They aren't coming back. I haven't heard from any of them since they left." I turned and climbed back into my truck and reached for the door but Sam stepped in the way.

"You're keeping vital information from the people that are trying to protect you and that's stupid. Fuck Bella, you're like the feces that are produced when shame eats too much stupidity. Can't you think of anyone but yourself? There are people other than you that live around here that are in danger because of them. You know what they can do. Now tell me…or so help me God I'll beat it out of you. I have no problem with sacrificing one to save many."

He stepped closer to me and I could see the fire in his eye. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. I thought he would drag me out into the street right there and execute his threat but he didn't. He just stared back at me waiting. Waiting as I choked back my tears and tried to pretend that I wasn't frightened for my life.

"Sam, please believe me," I pleaded with him. "I stayed with the Cullens for a month. They wouldn't hurt anyone. Yes they are strong. Unbelievably strong but they are also gone. Unbelievably gone. Now thank you so fucking much for ripping open all the wounds I spent the last four months trying to close. If you don't mind I'm going to go home." I didn't give him the opportunity to respond. I started my car and drove away with the door swinging open. I drove all the way home shaking. I was angry and frightened. Sam scared the crap out of me.

So many questions were running through my mind. How had they known about what happened with James in the woods? Why on earth did they think they could fight them? I knew the only way I would be able to get answers would be to talk to Jacob but I was ready yet. I spent the rest of the day cleaning and trying to finish up my vacation homework. At dinner Charlie questioned me about the Pow Wow. I considered telling him what happened with Sam but it dawned on me that I couldn't. I had no explanation for his hostility and I wouldn't put it past Charlie to go down to Sam's house and stick his gun in his face to find out. By the time I went to bed I was tried and aggravated. I decided to try the remedy from the night before and snuck down to Charlie's liquor cabinet. I watched TV drowning myself in vodka and cranberry juice until I couldn't see straight then dragged me drunk ass to bed.

The next day I woke to a loud banging noise. I had the hangover from hell and it sounded as if a swat team was trying to get into my house. I rolled out of bed covering me ears-which didn't help- and ran down the stairs.

"Bella?" Jacob yelled walking into my kitchen. He whipped around when I stepped on the bottom stair and it squeaked. "Oh, there you are. You're front doors unlocked. Do you have any idea how unsafe that is? Anyone can just walk in here." As he said this Sam came strolling up behind him glaring at me.

"Yea I see that. What… What are you doing here Jacob?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You haven't returned any of my calls." Jacobs's eyes unlike Sam's, were soft. His face was so much the Jacob that I was used to that I found myself oddly at ease even though Sam looked like he wanted to jump over Jacob's shoulder and rip my head off.

"I'm fine Jacob." He glanced over his shoulder nodding towards the door and Sam slowly backed out the kitchen.

"Sam has something that he wants to ask you. I told him it would be better just call but you weren't answering you phone so… "

I held my hand up silencing him. "Is that why you came here Jacob? If it is then save it, because I don't know how else to express to you that I have nothing to tell you."

"That's why Sam came but not me. I came just to….to see you." I felt the rush of blood to my face and at the same time saliva rushed into my mouth. I made it to the kitchen sink just in time before pink Lo Mien noodles came flying out of my mouth.

"Ewwww Bella's that's disgusting!" Jacob said laughing from behind me holding my hair back.

"Sorry Jake…I…."

"Had too much to drink last night from the looks of it." He came closer and sniffed me. "And from the smell of it," he said laughingly as a pushed him away. He pulled a glass out of the cabinet from above our heads and filled it with water. I drank it slowly watching Sam rifling around my living room from the corner of my eye. Jacob was still talking though for the life of me I couldn't repeat what he said. I couldn't take my eyes off of Sam. What on earth could he be looking for in my damn living room?

Then I realized what he was doing….he wasn't looking with his eyes…he was looking with his…his nose.

"Hello, Bella…..I'm talking to you!" My attention snapped to Jacob who was clapping his hand in my face. "Did you hear anything I said at all?"

"Um….yes….no….Jake look I don't feel well obviously," I motioned to the sink, "Do you think we could do this later. Besides I don't really want to talk about any of this with Sam in the house. I'll call you when I'm ready to talk." I pushed him towards the front door and Sam came in line behind me. In an instant a sense of terror washed over me I froze for a moment before sliding from between them held the door open.

"Bella I…."

"I'll call you Jacob. I promise. Soon. Bye." I said slowly shutting the door in his face.

Sam was sniffing my furniture like a….like a dog. What the hell?

Needless to say I didn't call Jacob over the next few days. A few times I caught Sam driving past my house, staring menacingly as he passed, which only added to my stress. I didn't want to deal with Deputy Dawg, but that kept Jacob away as well. I noticed that since he kissed me…since I met Sam and the rest of their "pack" he didn't come around. I didn't think I would miss his presence but I did.

Wednesday morning came and it was time to go back to school. Both the alarm clock I had gotten for Christmas and Charlie were screaming for me to get up.

"I'm up Dad! Stop yelling!" I screamed down the stairs on my way to the bathroom.

My eyes were bloodshot and my face was all splotchy. I showered and dressed decent enough for civilization but it didn't help how I felt. I felt like another piece of me was missing and I didn't want to admit that it might have something to do with Jacob.

"Geez Bella, do you have to flu or something. You look terrible. Didn't you sleep last night?"

"I'm fine Dad, God, you sure do know how to make a girl feel pretty."

"Well Bella, these past two weeks I haven't seen you in anything but sweat pants."

"Why get dressed when I'm just sitting in the house?"

"Why sit in the house? Why don't you give Jacob a call?"

"What's it to you?"

"Watch it young lady! He came here almost every day to sit with you while you were being zombie girl. So don't act like he isn't a good friend."

"You're right Dad. I'm sorry. I just don't like _his friends_, that's all." I got up from the table picking up my bag and headed for the front door. "I'll call Jacob when I get home from school today. I promise."

Maybe.

The first day back to school was just like any other day, except that I had the strange feeling that everyone was watching me. For some reason I felt like everyone knew my big secret and they were all talking behind my back. In math I caught Lauren and Jessica staring at me and whispering. I tried to follow her gaze, and I'm sure it was just my imagination but it seemed like they were staring at the bite mark that Tanya had left with she bit me or my hair...one of the two. By the end of the day my nerves were shot, and I finally had to admit to myself that the silent comfort I had grown accustomed to would not be there.

I jogged across the lot towards my and almost slipped on ice when I saw Sam I leaning on his truck, parked a few spaces away from me.

I screamed when he started to come towards me. "Bella, you're gonna answers my questions now!" Even from a distance I could see his eyes were bulging out of his head!

"No Sam!" I yelled holding my hands up. I was hoping it would catch someone's attention but no one even looked my way.

Had I become that invisible?

"Bella!"

"You've been stalking me, terrorizing me for two weeks. Leave me alone!" I jumped into my car turning the key in the ignition. It started with a roar and when the noise quieted I heard Sam saying something about "red hair" before I drove away. I could here my tires squealing as I sped out of the parking lot.

I drove fast looking for a place to pull over so I could calm down. I ended up pulling over in the wood half way between my school and home. I pulled the flask out from my book bag and climbed out of my truck into the bed of it. The cold air felt good against my face as I let the Captain Morgan and ginger ale warm me from the inside out.

Before I knew it I was feeling rightly drunk and knew that I should get home before one of Charlie's deputies found me making snow angels by the side of the road. I chuckled to myself climbing out of the bed of the truck. I stumbled, almost falling and then missed the handle completely when I reached for it.

"Ha ha….I'm drunk." I laughed out loud, reaching for and missing the handle again.

"Okay Swan…getting it together. Lets just get home and we can sleep this off by the time Charlie comes in with his whipping stick." I concentrated intently on grabbing the handle and pulled the door open.

"_Bella what the hell do you think you are doing_?"

My body went cold and rigid as that beautiful and familiar voice rang loud in my ears. I stoop up slowly searching for him as my breath came out in short gasps…but there was no one. There was nothing. There was no sound but the wind.

"Maybe I really am crazy," I thought to myself and started to hoist myself into the truck. The wind blew soft and cold against my face. It felt like his touch. I shook my head trying to shake away the thought it, climbed into my truck, and started the car.

"_Bella stop! You're drunk._"

"No shit Sherlock." I put the gear into drive and just as I was about to ease my foot off the break I heard his voice again, this time a whisper in my ear raising the hair on the back of my neck.

"_Bella don't. You could get into an accident. You could kill someone or worse yourself._"

"Shut up!!!!!" I screamed back at well…myself. The low rumbling of my engine took on a new sound in my ears. It sounded like his growl. I threw the car pack into park and ripped the keys out of the ignition throwing the on the floor. I knew he…the voice….whatever it was…was right. I was in no shape to drive. I pulled out my cell and dialed the number of the only person I knew would answer and come no questions asked.

"Bella, I'm so glad you called. Where are you?"

"In the woods near my school. Jake I'm gonna be honest with you. I'm drunk and I really need you to come get me."

"Um sure Bella…ill be right there. Just sit tight okay." The line went silent and while I waited I ended up drifting off to sleep. I heard when the door opened and peered with one eye at Jake climbing in giving me that ear to ear smile he always gives.

"You could have waited with the heat on you know. Don't you know that's how hobo's freeze to death?" His infectious laughter filled the car and I find myself smiling. When Sam wasn't around Jacob was like a breath of fresh air.

"Thanks for coming Jacob. I didn't realize I was so drunk until…I started hearing things."

"Hearing things?"

"Never mind…you'll think I'm crazy."

"I already think you're crazy, Loca. But not just for drinking in the middle of the day." He raised his eyebrow knowingly at me but the smile on his face just made me want to laugh and I did.

"Sam came to my school today Jacob. Seriously he's freaking me out. He's been like stalking me or something."

"I know." He kept his eyes on the road as he drove but I could see that it didn't bother him one bit.

"He threatened me that morning I left your house. I'm afraid of him."

"Don't be."

"He looked serious Jacob, How could I not be."

"He was serious, but you don't have to be afraid of him. I wouldn't let him hurt you. He thinks you know something about the vampire that passed through here a few days ago. It was an unfamiliar sent…didn't smell like the Cullens and well Sam thought you might know something. Do you?."

"No…I don't. The Cullens told me sometimes they had others that came through to visit them…maybe she's looking for them. Or maybe she's a nomad. How the hell should I know?"

"Well I told him you wouldn't but I've been wrong before." He narrowed his eyes at me and for a second his face was grave when he looked at me before his bright smile took over his face again.

" You know just because I dated a vampire that doesn't make me an expert."

"Okay God. Calm down…you're an angry drunk I see. "

"Shush Jacob" I said punching him in the arm as we pulled into Fork's only diner's parking lot. Jacob got out of the car and got halfway through the lot before realizing I wasn't with him. It's not like I expected him to come and open the door for me…but still…wasn't that like chivalry 101? He stood there waiting for me so I climbed out BY DRUNKEN SELF and we walked into the diner.

"So you don't know anything about Red?" Jacob asked after we place our orders.

"Red?"

"The vamp chick that's been running around here. She was around for a few days, we managed to keep her from feeding off anyone in town."

"And just how pray tell?"

"The how doesn't really matter. Just know that we're stronger than those stupid blood suckers you were running around with."

"Jake…you can't really run with vampires….because…you know…they're fast."

"Ha ha Bella. "

The food came and we and talked like old times. We talked a little about my inability to sleep and the nightmares leading to a lecture about my drinking. I made a promise that I would stop drinking alone. It wasn't really hard to give up now that it was making me delusional, but I didn't tell him that. Now that I was awake…I realized when Jake wasn't being Captain Questionmuch I actually liked being around him. At some point during the meal his hand reached across the table to hold mine. It felt…good. He radiated warmth and friendliness.

Sam ended up calling him, cutting our visit short and as I drive home I had to listen to Jacob convince him that I didn't know anything about the vampire girl.

"So. No more drinking right. If you feel like you cant sleep and need to talk…just call me Bella. I'm always here for you…you know that right.?"

I nodded and he sighed, leaning in to kiss me. I turned my head quickly so his kiss landed on my cheek. I felt him laugh against me and the feel of his warm breath sent chills from down my spine to right between my legs where I honestly hadn't felt anything in months.

"See you later Bells."

Jacob up and I both got out of my truck and I watched him jog up the street before turning towards the front door.

Since I already ate I whipped up dinner for Charlie and went up to my room. My thoughts started to circle and I as showered I came to the realization that, although I knew I would never be happy again…that didn't mean I couldn't be okay. Being around Jacob made it seem like the sun was shining for me again.

I would take Jacob up on his offer to come out of my shell as long as I didn't have to be around Sam if for no other reason then well…Jacob had always been my friend….nothing had changed that. As I crawled into bed I felt better but no sooner than I fell asleep the sound of wolves howling shocked me awake. At first I was dreaming but after picking myself up off the floor I knew that I wasn't. The howling didn't sound like a normal wolf's howl. It was louder…deeper…and sounded way to close to my house.

I crept down the stairs quietly, being careful not to wake Charlie and went to the back door. Looking out into the darkness I saw nothing but the howling didn't stop. Something drove me to open the door and step out side into the cold January air. I stepped into the back yard peering deeper into the woods when I saw a flash of red fly through the trees.

I was sure it wasn't what I thought it was….but after all I had seen how I could ever be sure of anything ever again. I turned walking back into the house, closing and locking the door behind me. As if it would make a difference I checked all the locks on the windows and drew all the curtains on the first floor and then the second before crawling into bed. After a few hours of tossing and turning I finally fell asleep and before I knew it, it was morning.

* * *

**A/N As a said a filler...on top of that it's proably a bunch of crap i know...but some of the details were important for future things...and i know it was a little long but im cramming as much into each chapter as possible....**

**Um...the next chapter is really important...I already have most of it planned out..im just getting my playlist together so hopefully i can get it done on top of all my work but if it takes a few days don't hate me...i have a state test and a college placement test coming up plus I'm moving...**

**As always I ask that you review...Even if its just to tell me what you thought of New Moon....I really liked it....just not the placement of the soundtrack...I only liked where they put like 3 of the songs...the rest just seemed to thrown in there....**


	39. The Sound of Settling

**The Sound of Settling**

**BPOV**

I ignored what I thought I saw…it was only what I thought I saw and nothing more. That's what I kept telling myself. Jacob told me that they had somehow managed to run "Red" out of town, that she was someone else's problem now, and since they couldn't catch her there was nothing they could do. So I had nothing to worry about right?

Wrong. These are the thoughts I pondered as I drove down to La Push for the 3rd time that week. I thought that I had nothing to worry about but it was clear that I was wrong. As I drove onto Jacob's street I caught a glimpse of Sam in my rearview mirror. It wasn't the first time I had seen him following me. Ever since that night , I had caught him lurking in the shadows several times though he never approached me. Now 10 days later he wasn't even trying to hide it anymore and I'd be lying if I said it didn't freak me the hell out.

"I thought you talked him," I said to Jacob as I walked into the house pulling off my gloves. Charlie was already here parked in front of the T.V. with Billy, beer cans scattered on the floor and a half eaten pizza in front of them.

"I did talk him Bella, there's only so much I can do. Just ignore him if it really bothers you." He smiled a warm friendly smile that dispelled my anger. It was hard to stay upset when Jacob smiled that way. "In any case I'm glad you finally got here, what took you so long?" He placed a slice of pizza in front of me, settling on the other side of the table and proceeded to eat right from the box.

"Charlie lets his laundry pile up. He's got work tomorrow, so I wanted to make sure his uniforms were clean and stuff." I picked up the slice of pizza, preparing to bite into it when the smell of anchovies assaulted my nose. I dropped it quickly, fighting back the urge to throw it against the damn wall. If there was one thing that I hated on my pizza it was anchovies! I pulled back the cheese to see the tiny fish lining the pizza and looked up at Jacob with a look of chagrin.

"Jake…um…who ordered the pizza tonight?"

"I did. Why? Something wrong with it?" he responded with his mouth full.

"No, I guess I'm just not in the mood for pizza again." I found it odd that he wouldn't remember I hated anchovies. We had just had this conversation yesterday.

"Well I could make you macaroni and cheese. I was gonna have some anyway."

"I'll make it. You sit. Enjoy you pizza."

As I got up from the table I felt Jacob's eyes on me. I could feel his eyes as if they were boring holes through me. I couldn't figure out what I had said to upset him but when I turned around it wasn't anger I saw in his eyes. It was something else, something that sent the blood rushing to my face.

"What?" I choked out as he stood slowly.

"Nothing."

"Then why are you looking at me like that?"

"Because you're beautiful." He closed the space between us in one step and wrapped his arms around me. I craned my neck back so I could see his face…protest…tell him not to do what I knew he was about to do.

"Jacob, don't please."

"Don't what Bella?" He answered in a whisper. He face was coming closer and closer to mine. Within seconds his lips would be touching mine. I could let him, I thought curiously. A wave of guilt washed through me quickly and I broke from his embrace.

"Jacob. I'm not ready…for that… okay."

"Okay Bella. What ever you want," he chuckled as I struggled to catch my breath.

We watched T.V. for the rest of the night with Charlie and Billy. At some point I had fallen asleep and when I woke up I found my head in Jacob's lap, his arm resting over mine, our fingers laced. I looked up to see that he was asleep as well with his head resting against the back of the couch. I felt like I should move but I couldn't bring myself to. From the angle I was in I could see the fullness of his lips and before I realized it my hand was reaching up to touch them. They were soft and slightly wet as if he had just licked them. I ran my thumb over them applying a little pressure and a low moan escaped him.

Something in me wanted to kiss him in that moment. I sat up slowly, my eyes fixed on his sleeping face. I couldn't deny that Jacob was well…very attractive. However I had seen and held and touched and tasted my vision of perfection. Anything else would be second rate. With a sigh I moved from the couch and quietly cleaned up the mess in the living room before waking Charlie, who had also fallen asleep, and taking him home.

Over the next few days I hung out with Jacob more and more. He had stopped making passes at me so when Angela invited me to go to the movies with her and Ben I didn't think twice to invite him. We met up with them in Port Angeles and I had a feeling of nostalgia as we walked side by side to our seat.

"I'm so sorry about this," Angela whispered to me when the lights went down.

"Sorry for what?" I whispered back confused.

"I didn't want to sit through this movie again by myself." she pointed at the screen and I could have turned green when I realized what we were watching.

Life Fucking Aquatic.

I almost wanted to laugh. It was like déjà vu.

"I'm sorry Jake. This movie is so lame." I whispered to Jacob. He turned to face me and from the glow of the screen I could tell he was looking at me like I was crazy.

"Are you kidding me? This movie's awesome." His smile stretched from ear to ear and I had a fleeting thought that some things just weren't meant to be. Angela and I exchanged groans and glances and finally excused ourselves to the bathroom unable to take anymore of the horror which was that movie.

"So…what's going on with you and Jacob, Bella?" She asked as I washed my hands. I looked at her in the reflection of the mirror unsure of what to say but I knew I owed her. Besides Jacob she was the only one who had stuck by me.

"Nothing. We've been friends since like the sandbox."

"He's cute."

"Yes, he is." I answered automatically. Immediately I felt the blush come and started playing with my hair to hide it.

"Hmmmmm…Looks like it could be more than friendship to me Bella. That's a good thing. Nothing to be embarrassed about."

"No…it's nothing like that. He knows that. He understands."

"I didn't say it was. I said it could be. Do you see the way he looks at you. He looks at you like you're the most beautiful girl in the world…It reminds me of the way.. Ed.."

I grimaced before she could even get the name out.

"It's not like I never entertained the thought Angela…its just that…well…something keeps pulling on my heart strings you know. Every time I think about breaking down that wall…something stops me…pulls me away."

"You know exactly what's pulling on those strings of yours." she said poking me in the chest. "I know it's hard but if you're ever going to get over it…you have to let go. I don't know how to tell you to do that… but you have to…You've been alone and miserable long enough Bella and even though I hate to say it, I doubt he's moping around like you."

I didn't want to admit that she was right. But I knew that she was. We sat outside the theater waiting for the boys to come out and when they did they were both laughing like the very best of friends. Ben came over and swept Angela up into his arms laughing as he kissed her. I watched them for a moment before turning to Jacob. He was looking at them too with a slightly envious look on his face.

"I uh got your jacket Bella." he said turning to me. The look of sadness on his face combined with the conversation I had with Angela prompted me to do something…daring.

"Thank you Jake," I said softening my voice and slipping my hand into his. He looked down at me incredulously and squeezed my hand before pulling me closer to him. We left the theater hand in hand and I couldn't help but notice how foreign it felt.

"So what's up with the hand-holding?" Jacob asked as we pulled in front of my house.

"Something new I suppose."

"New hunh…not that Im complaining…it was just unexpected but I've expected other things…better to just take what you give." He turned to me smiling and again I felt guilty. "I know you know how I feel about you Bella. I make a point for you to know. For you to know that I know what he did to you…but I need you to understand…I would never hurt you the way he did. Bella, you…you're heart…it's safe with me. I swear to you."

I could see the sincerity in his eyes. I could also see that he was hurting. And I hated myself. I hated the fact that although I felt something…it was no where near what he felt for me. When it came down to it…I was hurting my best friend and I didn't want to do that anymore. I reached over and wrapped my arms around his neck hugging him to me. He hugged me back running his fingers through my hair.

"Jacob, if I ever feel better…remind me to spend some good time with you."

"What?"

"Remind me okay…remind me how good you are…because you are good…you're my best friend Jake. My very best friend. You always have been…I'm sorry that I cant be what you want right now…but give me…some…some time okay."

"Like I said Bella. I'll wait."

I kissed his cheek and slowly got out of the car. I felt like a criminal.A bold faced liar. A cheat. I didn't know if time was going to change the way I felt but I knew I had to find out. As I fell asleep that night I knew exactly what I had to do. I had to go that house…see that they were gone…that they weren't coming back.

**EPoV**

The clicking of Rosalie's heels outside my door was irking me beyond belief. She had been out the for 45 minutes pacing back and forth debating whether or not I would listen to her of physically throw her out like I did last time.

"For the love of all that's holy just say what you have to already!" I yelled ripping the door open. She looked up at me startled then ducked underneath my arm into the room. She sat in the chair glancing around. _This place looks gross… Just because you're depressed doesn't mean you have to live in squalor._

"Out with it Rose. I'm busy."

"Busy doing what? Staring at the wall?"

"Rose…say what you have to say or get out and leave me alone."

_I'm worried about you. _She looked into my eyes and I could see through her mind how god awful I looked. My eyes were nearly pitch black and there were dark circles under them. My clothes were disheveled and there was a tear in my shirt that I hadn't noticed.

"You're not doing any better Edward."

"Not shit-Sherlock." I moved behind her quickly tearing the shirt from my body and grabbed another one from the pile on the floor.

"So…tell my why that is. It's been months Edward. Need I remind you this was your choice?"

"Rose, I'm not doing this with you. Just leave me alone okay."

"No. Listen it's not like I don't care about you Edward. You may not believe it, but I do. I don't like to see you like this. You're worse than you were before." She looked around the room again and her thoughts ran through memories of me pre-Bella. Getting up from the chair, she ghosted to the other side of the room and kicked over a pile of books. She picked up "Ticket to Ride" and from between it pages took out the picture of Bella I had stashed there. It was a picture Alice had taken without Bella knowing. She was lying on her stomach across the top of my piano and we were staring adoringly into each others eyes. I remembered I was playing a piano embellished version of "When the Day Met the Night".

"You never looked as happy as you did when you were with her. I wish I could have realized that a long time ago." Rose sighed and handed me the picture.

"Doesn't matter now." I took it from her and stared at Bella's beautiful face trying to swallow back the sense of longing that as taking over my body.

"But it does matter. You miss her."

"Miss her is an understatement Rose. I feel nothing at all aside from her absence. I miss her so much…God I'd even lick her fucking picture."

I was startled by Rose grabbing my chin forcing me to look at her. The intensity of her stare made me cower for a moment but then her eyes softened as she spoke.

"So why are you doing this to yourself?"

"I don't have a choice Rose. I'm doing what I think is the right thing to do."

"You think living in misery is right. From what I hear from Alice, Bella isn't exactly floating on cloud nine without you."

"She's better off without me."

"I beg to differ but that's neither here nor there. What about you?"

"What about me? Rose this isn't about me. This is about her. It's always been about her…even when I didn't know her."

"Then how could you leave her?"

"To save her!" I yelled back at her. I couldn't understand why no one realized that.

"Edward…I don't know what I would do without Emmett. I see you and I don't even want to imagine feeling a tenth of the what you're feeling right now…but you can make it go away."

"Rose…"

"You know im right Edward."

"What if I'm too late? It's been months and I haven't contacted her once. She probably hates me by now."

"I doubt she'll ever hate you Edward. A love like that doesn't die so easily. As long as you waited for her…are you really okay with throwing that all away? I don't believe for a second that you are. At least not without proof that you're doing the right thing."

I could feel a pull on my heart strings. The strings that were tethered to the place where I felt less like a savage and more like a human…and to the girl that made me feel that way.

"Edward, at least go back and see for yourself. If she's okay, then you can just come home…and you'll be able to move on because you know you did the right thing." She reached up and ruffled my hair before ghosting out the door.

Home. The word echoed in my head. Home…home…home. What is home? I thought, running my fingers delicately over Bella's face in the picture.

Home is where the heart it is and my heart was back in Forks.

**Bpov**

I didn't notice the drive. I allowed myself to go on autopilot long enough to make it over there. If I was going to fall apart I didn't want it to be behind the wheel of my truck. The heavily wooded area surrounding their driveway was blanket in freshly fallen snow. It looked like something out of a fairytale. The Wonderland I always thought it to be.

"You can do this." I said out loud as I climbed the stairs and reached for the knob on the blue hobbit door. I felt the knob turn; they never locked their door, why would they need to? It seemed frozen shut so I put my shoulder into and the door gave way sending me tumbling into the house.

I had expected to see empty room or at least white sheets covering all the furniture like you see on T.V. but there was none of that. It looked as though they had just been here minutes before I came in aside from the thin layer of dust that was covering all the everything. It still smelled of them. A mixture of all of their scents permeated the air. I moved from the kitchen into the living room where my eyes zeroed in on Edwards piano. Without realizing my feet had taken me over to it, my hands opened it, my fingers brushed across the keys.

Edward.

His name fell from my lips like a blessed Amen. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes, but I held them back. I had to be strong. I climbed the stairs to second floor. My hands lingered on the metal banister, its temperature reminded me so much of his touch. I shivered, shaking off the memory. I was supposed to be letting go…not conjuring.

I went into Alice and Jaspers room first and caught my reflection in her large gilt frame mirror. I let my finger run over the surface of her vanity...Jasper's bookshelf an guitars...so many memories. I picked my favorite one…Alice and I sitting Indian style in the middle of her California king size bed while Jasper and Edward sat across the room playing guitar. We were looking at pictures from her wedding album. The happiness they had to of felt that day was radiating from their smiles and twinkling eyes in the pictures. There was a picture of Edward, his face and the front of his tux covered in wedding cake and Emmett in a head lock, both of them grinning at the camera. I asked them if they actually ate the cake and Jasper laughed telling me how Emmett and Edward were in a contest of who could eat the most chocolate cake...Edward won so Emmett god mad and threw the rest of the cake on him.

I moved to Rose and Emmett's room next. I had only been in here a few times for obvious reasons, but I remembered watching Emmett playing Bloodrayne and laughing when he told Rose to dress up like her for Halloween. I wondered if she had.

Next I moved on to Carlisle's study and then Esme's art studio. I skipped their bedroom and stopped at Edward's door. I couldn't bring myself to open it just yet. Instead I ran my fingers over the paneling around the door and grabbed the handle. I slowly rested my forehead against the door and took a deep breath before pushing it open. I kept my eyes closed as I walked in but that didn't help. All I could smell was him. His sweet sweet redolence was thick in the air as if he were standing next to me. I opened my eyes fully expecting to see him but of course there was nothing there. Just the giant bed and a flood of memories that had me gasping for air.

Who was I kidding? I was never going to be able to let him go.

I threw off my coat and shoes and climbed into the bed. I wrapped the blanket that was thrown carelessly on it around me and buried my face in the pillows. And then I cried. Heartbreaking painful sobbing cries. I cried so hard I thought I would die right there. But I didn't. I cried until I couldn't cry anymore and then crawled out of his bed. My body moved robotically as I put my stuff back on and walked from his room shutting the door behind me.

With one last glance at the house, I climbed back into my truck. I knew I would never fully recover, but I also knew that though being there had ripped me wide open…I needed to do it. I needed to say my last goodbye…the goodbye I never got to say.

Charlie grunted a hello as I walked past him to my room. I slowly, tentatively picked up the phone. It hurt to even think about what I was about what I was going to do…but I kept telling myself it was right… and in the end it would work out for the best.

Jacob picked up the phone on the third ring. His breath was jagged as if he had been running.

"Hey Bells! What's up. I thought you were having girls day or something?"

"Um…yea…I did. But I'm home now and I… I missed you today."

"Oh really?" I could hear him smiling on the other end of the phone. When the hell had I learned to lie so well?

"Yea, and well I just wanted to tell you that…"

"That?"

"That…I feel…Better."

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**A/N So yea....I've been waiting to write this chapter for a while but im even more amped about the next one...next to the very last chapter it's going to be my favorite.....so i hope you all enjoyed this one....and look out for the next one becuase i already started it and once i hit 200 it will be up.**

**Please review....i worked very hard on this one...and your feedback would be greatly appreciated it.**

**As always i thank you for your continued support...**

**Now who's Excited to see Remember Me... I can't friggin wait.**

**Also to my U.S. Fans...check out that Alice in Wonderland special they have on the Syfy channel...i watched the first part of it and its really good...Andrew- Lee Scott is my new British crush...(dont worry Rob...you'll always be number one on my list of Brits in my heart)  
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	40. My Funny Valentine

**A/N I AM SO SORRY! As most of you know last week was finals week so i was super busy with papers and studying. I thought i would have time to write but I didn't. On top of that I'm also moving, so I''m trying to pack as well...Please please forgive me.**

**I tried to make this longer to make up for my lack of posting...I hope you really enjoy it because I've been waiting to write this for weeks.**

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* * *

****My Funny Valentine**

**BPoV**

_"All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy."_  
Edwards face came in so close to mine I could feel his breath on my lips. I reached out to grab him but caught only air.

_"I wanted the world for you Bella. The whole world…no limitations." _I scrambled up from my tangled sheets reaching for him but as he spoke, he drifted farther and father away.

"Edward wait! Got Damnitt! Wait!"

My words were wasted. He was gone. That was the fifth time in a week that I had that dream. Each time his face was clearer than the time before. Each time it was more painful.

As I got out of bed heading for the shower, I chalked the dream up to a guilty conscience. Since my visit to the house, Jacob and I had spent even more time together than before. I didn't think about them as much now that I had said my goodbyes. As much, but obviously not not at all. I hurried out of the shower, dressing quickly. Valentine's Day had snuck up on me faster than I had anticipated and glancing at the clock I realized I had napped longer than I meant to. Jacob would be here any minute.

Just as I was stepping out of my room I heard Jacob coming in the front door. He smiled up at me looking me over. I noticed that although my face should have been beet red, it wasn't. Charlie grumbled something about us not staying out to late and to "be safe" after snapping a few pictures. I shuddered at what he was trying to imply. To think that Charlie would think…I didn't even want to think what he could have been thinking.

We stepped out onto the porch just as a chilly wind blew past us. Jacob jogged towards the car but I walked slowly, inhaling deeply. For some reason over the last five days, the air had smelled…sweeter. The weight that had been pressing on my chest felt as if it had been magically lifted and I could breathe deep and easy again. I was so entranced in my thoughts that I almost didn't hear Jacob yelling at me to hurry up and get in the car. His voice shocked me out of my reverie and my head cocked to the side when I saw that he was already in the car. Yes, I was used to the fact that in Jacob's case, chivalry was in fact dead. But this was a date. Our first real date and he still didn't even think to open my door for me. Laughing to myself I climbed into the car.

"What's so funny?"  
"Nothing. I was just thinking about something." Jacob looked at me from the corner of his eye while reaching into his backseat. He pulled out a small heart shaped box and put it in my lap.  
"I thought we said no gifts?"  
"You said no gifts. That doesn't mean that I have to listen."  
"No it doesn't, but I don't have anything for you."  
"You're here. That's enough." He smiled is warm Jacob smile as I settled back into the seat smiling to myself as we drove off.

"However, it would also be really great if you didn't get mad at me."  
"For?"  
"For where I'm taking you." He glanced over at me and I raised my eyebrow at the guilty look on his face.  
"Where are you taking me?"  
"You'll see." I didn't need him to say another word when we turned onto the highway that led to La Push.

"Oh No. No No No No No. We are _not _going to Sam's house Jacob!"  
"Oh come on Bella. Sam isn't that bad and it's like tradition. We've been throwing this Valentines Day party for years. I can't just not show up because you don't like him."  
"Not like him is an understatement Jacob. He scares me. I still catch him following me sometimes."  
"Look Bells, I talked to him about that. He's gonna back off now. No worries. I promised you that you'd always be safe with me. I don't break my promises." Jacob reached over and grabbed my hand.

"Okay fine. We'll go. Just promise me one thing Jacob…and I mean it."  
"Anything you want."  
"Do not leave me by myself in there." He flashed another smile at me before bringing my hand to his lips. He kissed me gently and the warmth from his lips sent tingles through my body.  
"Don't worry. I won't leave your side."

We rode the rest of the way with Jacob recounting past Valentines parties and all of the disasters including the one 2 years ago when Emily got her scars.  
"How did that happen again?" I asked him as we pulled onto Sam's street.  
"She was out in the backyard bringing Sam's gift in from the garage and she got attacked by an animal. Sam managed to ugh…get control of the situation before she was killed."  
"That's awful. Sam must have felt horrible."  
"You have no idea Bella, you have no idea," he said as we walked through Sam's gate.

I could already hear the music blaring from inside. The porch was lit up with tiny red lights and the lamps in the windows glowed red through the fabric thrown over top of them. Jacob's warm hand covered mine as we stepped up porch. I couldn't help but smile at the excitement on his face. I had been trying for weeks to be better for him. If this is where he wanted to be tonight then I would try my hardest to be in good spirits. I owed him that.

"Jacob's here!" Emily screamed from the kitchen doorway. From her over-excitement and slight slur I could tell she was drunk. She stumbled over to him throwing her arms around his neck and pulled him into the house. He stumbled with her and in his stumbling let go of my hand.  
"I taught you wood neva git here Jacoob!" Jacob laughed squeezing Emily in a hug before passing her off to Sam.  
"What and miss the party? Never!" I stepped up behind Jacob and grabbed his hand again when I felt Sam staring at me.  
"Bella. I didn't expect you to come." he said gruffly to me.  
"I convinced her. I can be very persuasive when I want to be." Jacob said beaming back at me.  
"Yea, when you want to be. Not when we need you to be." Sam rolled his eyes and spun on his heels walking back towards the kitchen.

"Don't mind him Beller, he's always so crabby on Valentines day…you know because of ma face." Emily said pulling her hair back to reveal her scars. She started laughing and at that Sam ran back over pulling her away.  
"Babe, why are you doing that? Don't make a joke out of this…it isn't funny."  
"Oh deer…I am ever so sorry!" Emily started laughing again with a big smile on her face. For the first time since I had met Sam he smiled. I could see the love that he had for her in his eyes and couldn't believe that he was the same person. He grabbed her arms and placed kisses on the scarred side of her face while she giggled like a school girl.

"See, I told you that Sam wasn't so bad. You just have to get on his good side."  
"I wasn't aware that I was doing anything to get on his bad side."  
A pretty girl named Leah came over and took my coat. I looked over my shoulder as Jacob led me to the buffet table and I could swear I saw her sniff it then turn her face away in disgust. I felt like a bird sitting next to him with my tiny plate of food while he gorged himself. Everyone was eating, drinking, or dancing. Or in Quil's case all three. Periodically someone would come over to us and start talking to Jacob, pretty much ignoring me, but I tried no to let it wear me down. Jacob was having a good time. That's all that mattered.

Just as I was finishing my plate a song came on that sent Jacob shooting up out of his seat. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the middle of the room.

"Jacob, what the hell are you doing?" I screamed as he started spinning me on the dance floor.  
"What does it look like? I'm trying to dance with you…and you're not doing a very good job."  
I felt the blush rush to my face as I felt thoroughly insulted and embarrassed.  
"Aww what's that matter Jacob, does the bloodsucker lover have two left feet?" Leah said coming up behind me. "You're welcome to take over for me Leah, I don't mind." Leah all but hissed at me pushing me to the side. "It's bad enough that you are here, but don't think that just because Jacob likes you, that gives you the privilege to say my name."  
"Leah, don't start. We talked about this." Jacob boomed at her.  
"Sorry Jacob. You're right. I was out of line." She smiled at him and he started laughing. "Forgive me?" she said holding her arms out to him. He nodded, hugging her and then started spinning her to the music. As I reclaimed my plastic chair I looked around me wondering what the hell was wrong with everyone there. One minute it looked like they were about to break out into a blood match and the next they were laughing.

A half and hour later, I scanned the room again, this time searching for Jacob who had never come back to me. After another half hour of sitting there by myself I realized that I had never felt so alone in a room full of people in my life. Leah was right. I didn't belong there. A half an hour after that I contemplated getting up to find Jacob but Sam heading over in my direction.

"Looking for Jacob?"  
"Uh, yea…do you know where he is?"  
"Yup." He said settling in the chair next to me. I tensed up automatically as just his presence sent my fight or flight senses haywire.  
"Well are you going to tell me where he is?"  
"Quid pro quo."  
"Excuse me?"  
"Quid pro quo. You give me something, I give you something."  
"Fine, I'll just go find him myself." I stood up from the seat but Sam angrily yanked me back.  
"Don't you think it would just be easier to tell me what I want to know?" He said letting go of my arm. I rubbed the spot where his hand had been glaring at him. It felt like the after shock of a burn.  
"What were you doing at the Cullen's house a few weeks ago?"  
"I was minding my fucking business. Why don't you try it?" I said back to him, trying to fill my voice with as much venom as possible.  
"I went there for my own personal reasons. Now if you don't stop following me I am going to get my dad tell me where Jacob is so I can leave!" I yelled back at him. I was shaking with anger and seeing red.  
"He went on a beer run," he answered laughing in my face.  
"He left me here!"  
"Ugh yea…I guess so." Sam stalked away laughing and if I hadn't been raised right…and utterly afraid that he could and would in fact rip my head off, I would have hit him with his own stupid plastic chair.

All eyes in the room were on me in that moment and I felt so embarrassed I ran out of there as fast as my stumbling legs could take me, leaving my coat wherever the hell it was. It was fuh-reezing and I wrapped my arms around myself rubbing my them trying to create some warmth. I didn't see Jacob's car anywhere but I knew he only lived a few blocks away so I took off for his house, hoping to that I would be able to call Charlie to come and get me.

I was thoroughly pissed and freezing when Jacob's car pulled up on the side of me a block away from his house.  
"Bella, get in the car!" Jacob yelled from the driver side.  
"No!" I yelled back through chattering teeth.  
"You want to catch pneumonia? Get in the car…I'm sorry! Im so sorry. Please get in the car!"  
He stopped the car and ran over wrapping my coat around me and pressing his body against me. I started to shiver in his arms as I started to thaw.  
"Bella, I'm so sorry. I didn't think you'd notice I was gone and then Sam said he'd leave you alone but he didn't and then Leah told me you just ran out…without your coat…What's wrong with you?"

He pushed me back into the car. My body was to frozen to try and fight him off.  
"You promised you wouldn't leave me. Why did you do that Jacob? Why do you keep bringing me around them? They all hate me." I asked him once I thawed enough to speak.  
"Emily doesn't hate you for one thing. And I'm trying to let them get used to you and you to them. I'm sorry about leaving you but you looked fine…I only expected to be gone ten minutes. I'm sorry I screwed up. Let me make it up to you." He turned to me taking my hands in his. His eyes were sorry, so sorry that I couldn't deny him.  
"Okay, fine. I forgive you. How are you going to make it up to me?" A smile spread across his face and he started the car again taking off away from Sam's house.  
"I'm gonna take you some place special. Some place where we can just be us…just the two of us." Jacob held my hand the whole ride there. I didn't realize until we got there, just where he was taking me.

"I've been here before" I said in a daze as he stopped the car.  
"Oh, of course you have. Who hasn't been here?" Jacob had taken me to the look out spot that Edward had taken me to when we went to the movies with Angela and Ben. It was the most painful kind of déjà vu.  
"Look, we can leave if you want." Jacob said turning my face to his. "I'm sorry. I didn't even think that he would have taken you here…or why he would have." Jacob looked hurt and I felt a pang of guilt. I was doing it again. Letting my past rule me….I said my goodbye….It was time to…

"It's okay; I suppose its time for me to start making new memories. If I avoided all the places we went, I'd never leave my…well…I wouldn't even be able to…Never mind...you get the point. New memories." I reached over and switched on the radio and leaned my seat back.  
"What are you doing? You never play music when we're together?"  
"New memories…Jake…new memories." Jacob leaned his seat back as well, and then reached behind him pulling a flask from beneath the pile of clothes in his backseat.

He took a swig and then passed to me where I in turn drank some. The bitter alcohol burned going down but since I needed the extra warmth I ignored it.

"So what _were _you doing at the Cullen's house?" Jacob asked me after a few minutes.  
"Quid pro quo Jacob." I retorted stealing a line from Sam.  
"What do you want?"  
"I want to know why you think you can fight a vampire and survive, let alone kill one."  
"I've told you so many times Bella," he said putting one hand behind his head and looking at me from the corner of his eye with a shit eating grin on his face, "The how is not important. Just know that we can."

That was one of the only things I hated about Jacob. He was so secretive sometimes. That, and he seemed to be Sam's lap dog in ways. No matter where we were or what we were doing, if Sam called, Jacob would go running.

"So you're never going to tell me."  
"There's no need for you to know," he answered shrugging his shoulders I sighed and took another swig from his flask. Sure Edward had kept things from me but when I asked him…he told me what I wanted to know…even if it hurt.  
Jacob started rambling on about something, I was to busy staring at the stars in the sky. I let my thoughts drift and then I noticed it was quiet in the car. I reached out for Jacob's hand without looking and only ended up grabbing his gearshift. When I turned I saw that both his hands were behind his head.

"You know Jacob, life is funny. Who would have thought that we'd ever end up here?"  
"I guess our dad's really. That's why they used to make us play together all the time." We both laughed again and I turned my head slowly…this was one of those moments….the one's where you just look at each other and every thing clicks. Jacob was still staring out the window. I took another sip. And then another. And another. Jacob took the flask from me momentarily, taking a sip himself and then passing it back to me.

"So, are you going to tell me now? Or am I gonna have to wait until you're drunk and see if you just tell me."  
I sighed heavily so he would know that his pushing the issue was annoying me and then rolled my eyes for effect.  
"Fine. I actually went there for you if you must know. I never got to say goodbye. I thought that if I went there…I could have my goodbyes…and be here for you." Jacob turned in his seat all the way to face me. "Really?" There was an eagerness in his eyes that warmed my heart…or was it the alcohol?

"Bella, that was very...I don't know what to say." Within seconds I was in his arms. His soft warm lips were pressed against mine, his tongue asking for entrance into my mouth. I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling myself closer to him and opened my mouth to him.

He was so warm.

His kiss was slow but forceful. It wasn't bad…I didn't hate it…it was just different. I slipped my hands up into his hair pulling out his ponytail holder as he tentatively circled my tongue with his. He pulled back for a moment, taking in a breath as we stared into each others eyes. Then he attacked my face hungrily, this time completely covering my mouth with his. One of his hands fumbled with the seat handle and we bounced as the seat fell all the way back. He pulled me completely into his seat so that I was straddling him, all the while kissing me feverishly.

"My god, Bella I've been waiting to kiss you like that for weeks," he moaned into my neck. I felt his hands moving underneath my shirt on my back and his hands were literally setting fire to me. My entire body was getting hot. Too hot. I didn't realize until Jacob placed a wet kiss on the bare skin of my breasts that I had taken my shirt off. I moaned at the feel of his obvious erection pressing against me.

Jacob's hands felt so good as they roamed over me. I allowed my hands to crawl underneath his shirt, over his well defined muscles. He massaged circles into my back then he dragged his hands slowly around my sides, grabbing my breasts in his hand. I moaned again as he pushed me down harder into his lap and images of that night that I was here with Edward flickered through my mind. I swallowed hard trying to rid my mind of the images as Jacob started to suck on the skin at the base of my neck.

"I love that I can make you make that sound." he murmured into my skin. The vibrations of his deep voice sent ripples through my body and I pulled his head back so that I could kiss him again and that's when it happened…Death Cab for Cutie's "Cath" crept from the radio into my ears and I had that moment of clarity…that moment in time where everything does seem to click…but not in the way you would expect. This was that moment that you tell that them you love them but you don't. You touch their skin and then you think that he is beautiful...but he doesn't mean that to me.

Jacobs's hands were fumbling with the buttons on my jeans as we stared into each others eyes. I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. I felt like I would burst into a million pieces, instead I just sat there, dumfounded as he got my pants open. I put my hands over Jacob's stopping him from pulling my pants down and stared into his eyes for a few more seconds. Leaning in slowly I kissed him, willing myself to feel something…anything for him.

Love…Love…is a verb…Love is a doing word….So love him…Love him Damnitt, I shouted in my head. But I couldn't. I didn't feel for Jacob the way he felt for me and I never would. Why can't it be that no two people feel the same way at the same time? I whimpered into his mouth and pulled away sliding back into my seat. Like Edward, love and lust are one in the same for me…and because I only loved Edward…he would be the only one to have me  
"I'm sorry Jacob…I…I…Cant." His erratic breathing steadied as he gave me back my shirt. I put it back on feeling like I was coming apart at the seams and this time for good.

"Would you like me to take you home Bella?" He asked me softly and a wave of guilt rushed through me again. The thought of hurting him was killing me.  
"I think you should. I'm sorry…I guess I just had too much to drink or something."  
"No need to apologize Bella. Besides, I would never want the first time we do that to be in my car after we've been drinking. I have more respect for you than that."

**EPoV**

I made a mental note to thank Alice for making my travel arrangements for me, but why I didn't notice her timing I didn't know. She had seen how long it would take for me to be ready, and planned it so that day would fall on Valentine's Day. Alice….always the romantic. So there I was, sitting in the rental car a block away from Bella's house waiting for her to get home from her "date" as I picked up from Charlie's mind. Through his mind I had seen her, every bit as beautiful as I has remembered if not even more so. She was thinner yes, and her eyes had none of that glow I had come to love…but she still looked like my Bella. She sure as hell still smelled like my Bella. I laughed when I realized who she was going out with. This Jacob bared a striking resemblance to Ephraim Black.

A car…let me rephrase…a piece of shit turned the corner onto Bella's street and I shot up banging my head on the roof of the car when I heard it. That music to my ears. Bella's rhythmic and intoxicating heartbeat. My senses zeroed in on it and I had to catch myself from jumping out of the car and running to her. I quickly searched the thoughts of Jacob sitting next to her.

_God…she's amazing._ He had no idea. _Kissing her like that was better than I imagined. _What the fuck?_  
If I ever see that bloodsucker again I'll rip him apart for what he did to her_. Yup, he was exactly who I thought he was. _God her breasts are amazing…does she even know she the most amazing breasts?_ I felt the car handle crush in my hand …had she…could she have possibly?

Pain ripped through my body and I had to stifle my screams by biting into my own arm. I didn't want to draw attention to myself, so I stated the car, driving away. That son of a bitch would smell me and with the jealousy and pain that was wreaking havoc on me, I would have ripped his damn head off. I parked close enough that I could still listen in…It couldn't be…Alice would never have told me to come back if she….

"_Bella, it's okay. You don't have to keep apologizing?"  
"Yea but, you and…I just…I ruined everything. I ruin everything…I'm sorry."  
"It's okay babe. Go on inside and get some sleep. I'll call you tomorrow."  
"Jacob…Just know…just know that….I do…love you…I do really."  
"I know you do Bells. I know." _

God how I fucking wish…I could block out peoples thoughts. He kissed her. He put his lips on her lips. His hands on her face. His other hand pulling her into him…and he moaned…and she…she whimpered….

FUCK!!!!!!! GET OFF OF HER!!!!!!!

I breathed hard unnecessarily, trying to do anything to keep myself from running back there and killing him. I watcher her dazed expression through his eyes. She touched her lips and then leaned back against the door.  
"_Good night Jacob." _She closed the door and he bounced back to his car like a love-sick little boy, images of him and Bella in bed flickering through his head. The mere thought…of him…being…inside…of…her…had me seething.

I waited until he drove away to get out of the car. It's was over. I waited too long….I was too late…Who the hell was I to make her wait? Alice was wrong. Rosalie was wrong. They were all wrong wrong wrong.

Fate is an elegant cold-heart whore.

Bella had moved on as I had intended for her to do. I came to Bella's backyard and scaled the tree and sat, waiting patiently to catch a glimpse of her through her window. I would wait until she was asleep. If she moved on and she was happy...I didn't want to do anything to jeopardize that.

"_How was your date?" _I heard Charlie ask her through his mind_  
"It was fine? Why?"  
"I got a call from Billy. Said you were running around outside with no coat on."  
"Oh, yea…well…I don't have an explanation for that."  
"Okay…..well are you alright? Did you and Jake get into a fight or something?"  
"No…It wasn't Jacob…I just…Dad I'm tired…can we talk about this in the morning."  
"Okay, but I do want to know what happened Bella."  
"Okay dad." _Charlie hugged her and I was jealous. I wanted to be the one to hold her in my arms._  
"Bella…is that alcohol I smell on your breath?"_ She blushed a deep blush…I could smell it from outside. I waited for the venom to flood my mouth but it didn't. My reaction…was lower.  
"_I think the punch at Sam's party was spiked or something."  
"Mhm. Get to bed Bella. We'll talk in the morning."_  
I watched through Charlie's eyes as she stumbled up the stairs and then I waited patiently as she showered. From my perch in the tree I watched her step into the room. She was wearing flannel pajama pants rolled low on her hips and a tight tank-top that hugged her perfect figure. My body longed to touch her. It was so bad that I was physically in pain. She sat on the edge or her bed brushing out her longer than I remembered brown hair. Her eyes seemed to twinkle for a moment and I wondered what she was thinking of but then decided I didn't want to know. If she was thinking of him it would floor me.

For once I thanked God that I couldn't hear her thoughts.

I didn't have to wait much longer before she was asleep. Charlie had gone to bed shortly after she had gotten in the shower and I could hear him snoring from the next room completely oblivious to me sneaking into her window. I placed the ruffled tulips I had purchased for on the dresser and slowly turned to face her. Her scent was burning a hole in my throat but I didn't care. I walked slowly over to her bed and knelt by her side. Her scent was a heavenly punishment as I stared down at her. Even in her sleep she was beautiful. Her hair was splayed across her face in such away that her lips were peaking through, slightly parted…begging to be kissed.

So carefully I brushed her hair back from her eyes, so as not to stir her. She looked so small and fragile, lying there sleeping. For decades I had questioned my existence, I wasn't sure what kind of answering I was look for…until I met her. In that moment it was clear to see the purpose for my existence was laying there in front of me. It was my job to protect her and now I could because I was stupid. She rolled over onto her back still facing me and I sank lower to the floor. This perfect angel…I had let her go…like a fucking idiot.

In steady sequence, one by one, I cataloged every detail of her that I could see as it would be the last time I would ever see her. The steady rise and fall of her chest as she slept, and the outlines of her face and body. I only wished for a moment that I could get one last look in her eyes…her warm chocolate brown eyes that conveyed the depths of her pure soul. I settled for the last next best thing. The warmth of her skin. Gently I took her hand in mine and felt like I would melt right into the floor. She sighed, rolling her head from facing me to the ceiling. I could hear her heart rate pick up, probably from my cold hands, but I couldn't pull away.

In an almost muted voice I said my last goodbye.  
"Bella, my sweet sweet Bella. I love you. I wish that I hadn't of left you. I have no one to blame by myself for my pain All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy, to have the world, with no limitations. I'm glad to see that for once, I did right by you. I see now that I did the right thing. I just had to come back and see for myself, and now that I have…I can…I'll have to…let you go. I just want you to know…No matter how far I go…My heart remains with you."

She let out a small whine and I quickly let go of her hand and stood up to leave. I looked down at my love one last time and couldn't help myself; I moved slowly and pressed my lips gently to hers. So gently that, although I felt her warmth, she would feel none of my cold. I fought back a groan of pain, not from thirst but from loss, and ghosted towards her window when a voice from behind me stopped me in my tracks.

"Ed…ward…please…" she sighed out. I spun to face her. Was she awake? No…she turned over, the pillow muffling her words before she rolled back onto her back. This time she cried out loud, a painful cry. The kind that I never wanted to hear from her. I waited, frozen, for Charlie to burst into the room but he didn't come. She lay there whimpering, tears rolling down her face but she was still asleep.

"Edward…please come back…please come back to me." Like a dog on a leash I was pulled back to her side, kneeling before like she was a prayer alter.  
"Edward, I …I love you."

That was enough for me. I pulled her up into my arms pressing my lips to hers. Her heart rate soared and I felt her wrap her arms around me. She kissed me back hard, running her hands up my back and into my hair. I moaned with pleasure into her mouth and she returned the sound when I let my hand slip underneath the back of her shirt pressing her to me. We kissed…an epic…mind-shattering….heart-mending kiss, before she pulled away. She blinked furiously, forcing her eyes to focus on my face and I waited patiently- holding her to me, unwilling to ever let her go again- for her to speak.

"Edward? Am I…I have to be…are you really…"  
"I'm here Bella. I'm really here. You're not sleeping…you aren't dreaming." And then she did the worst thing she could possibly do. She pushed me away. I sank to the floor feeling the pain of her rejection rip through my body.

"Edward what the hell are you doing here? When did you get back?"  
"Five days ago, I whined out, "and I had to see you Bella. I was going crazy without you. I stayed away for as long as I could…but I just couldn't do it anymore." I looked up at her with pleading eyes, willing her so look at me and see the pain that I was in…to see that I was sincere. She said nothing, just stared at me with a look of disbelief plastered on her face.

"Bella, I was stupid. I was so incredibly stupid. I love you more than you'll ever know and part of me died when I decided to let you go. When I said it wasn't worth it anymore that was the blackest kind of blasphemy there is. I love you. I've loved you all along. I had to come back and see you. I told myself that if you were happy…I would leave you alone forever…because all I ever wanted was for you to have that happiness."

"So you were going to leave again?" her voice was shaky and weak. I could tell she trying not to cry.  
"Yes…I mean you're happy aren't you? I saw you with Jacob. I saw him kiss you at the door. What you did in his car." She gasped and I had to shake her to make her breath again.  
"You saw…that?"  
"Well…he was thinking about it. I wasn't watching you if that's what you were thinking. Although it makes no difference. That image is forever burned into my mind."  
"I'm sorry that you had to see that."  
"Yea so am I." She leaned back against the headboard and pulled a pillow over her chest…putting space between us.  
"I didn't mean for you to see me. I just came into say my final goodbye but you said my name…and I couldn't leave. I'll go now. I'm sorry. I made a promise to you and I'm sorry that I broke it." I turned around to leave but she jumped up and grabbed my arm. Her touch instantly set fire to my skin and I fell back to my knees in front of her pressing my head to her stomach. She held me to he tightly for a moment before speaking

"This is the only promise I've ever been happy that you broke." I looked up into her tear-filled eyes and was overwhelmed by love over her again. I pulled her down and she wrapped her arms around my neck, kissing me.

She pulled away after a few minutes gasping for air. I held her hands to my chest waiting for her to speak but again she was speechless.  
"Bella, I'm hanging on every word you say, but if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright with me. I want nothing more than to sit here and listen to you breathing….I don't want anything else …just to be here…with you."  
"After all this why would you ever want to leave me?"  
"Because i thought i was too late. Because I wanted you to be happy. I didn't want to interfere."

"But I'm not happy Edward. I'm a mess. I've been trying…trying so hard but I can't….I cant _be _without you and you were really just going to come in here and say goodbye and not even bother to wake me…let me see you. You weren't even going to ask me if I was happy…what I wanted. Here we are…both in ridiculous amounts of pain…and you were just going to let it continue."

She curled herself into a ball and sobbed into her knees. It killed me even more to see her this way and to know that I was the cause of it. I pulled her into my lap and rocked her gently trying to comfort her. She cried harder for a moment and then calmed down. I felt her place her hands on my chest and she pushed away looking up into my eyes.

"I just can't believe you're back," she whispered running her hands over me as if to feel that I was real, "I always hoped you would but then so much time passed…and I didn't hear anything from anyone…I didn't think that you would."  
"I was trying not to, but I couldn't be without you anymore. Bella I love you. I'm here now and if you'll have me… I'll stay. Just tell me that I'm not too late. Tell me that you'll give me a chance to make it up to you. If you wont', I'm still not leaving. I'll grovel and beg if I need to... if that's what it will take."

She smiled warmly at me placed her hands gently on my face before pulling me her lips again. I reveled in the feel of her kiss…I never thought I'd feel it again.

"Edward, you really broke my heart," she said after pulling away.  
"I know Bella; you have no idea how sorry I am. I didn't think about all the ways that I'd hurt you and myself by leaving. I thought I was doing the right thing. I'm very sorry."

"Edward…don't apologize to me. Just don't do it again. Do not ever leave me again. Or so help me God…I don't…I don't even know what I'll do"

"So you can forgive me?"  
"Yes."  
"Just like that?"  
"You want me to put up a fight?"  
"No…I just thought that you…"  
"For someone that relies on other people thoughts for their safety it sucks that your own are so misleading. What ever it was that you thought is wrong. I don't want Jacob. What I want is you. It's always been you. There is no one else that can take you place Edward Cullen. I don't know how to make you see it. My love for you is blind. There is nothing and no one that could change the way I feel about you. No amount of distance or time is ever going to erase the depth of my love for you."  
"This is going to sound really bad but, you have no idea how happy I am that you feel that way…because I honestly…I honestly don't know how to live without you."

I rubbed the tears away from her cheeks and kissed them, sucking in her scent for dear life. I couldn't believe what she was saying but I was beyond ecstatic that she say was saying it. I sat her back on the bed and knelt before her taking her hands in mine. As stared up at her, I felt damned by the light coming from her eyes. My soul…if I had one…my everything…belonged to her. Only she had to the power to crush me…that was clear to see, but as I looked at her gentle hands in mine I knew I was safe. She was my goddess and i would spend the rest of her days worshiping her.

"Bella…I promise you…"  
"Don't me anymore promises."  
"Okay then I swear."  
"Don't swear either…whatever it is that you're going to say…just do it."  
"Okay…Then I _will_ for the rest of your days…I will make you happy. My body is here at hand…your each wish to fulfill…your servant to command, I am and shall be still. I will never ever do that to you again."

I leaned my head into her lap and she ran her fingers through my hair. I could feel her teardrops falling onto my head but I didn't care. I was here…with my Bella…and she loved me. She pulled at my shirt so I would move on to the bed with her and I did, reaching down to retrieve her blankets but she wasn't having it.

"No. No blankets. I want you to hold me…Hold me and never ever ever let me go again. I said before Edward, nothing between us. Ever." Thankfully she still had the space heater in the closet. Turning it on, I lay next to her on the bed. It seemed as though I had never left. She fit perfectly into my arms, staring up at me with her beautiful sleepy brown eyes. I held…more like clutched her to me and every time she would start to drift off to sleep she would kiss me to keep herself awake. After about an hour she was fighting harder to stay awake and I knew she needed to sleep.

"Bella love, close you eyes and sleep."  
"I…don't want to…"she responded sleepily, "I'm afraid you'll disappear"  
"Sleep, Bella. I'll be here in the morning when you open your eyes," I whispered in here ear. I knew the calming tone of my voice would lull her to sleep.  
"But…"  
"No buts, Bella. Sleep. That faster you go to sleep, the faster you can wake up. Don't keep me waiting. I love you."

A small stretched across my angels face as her breathing slowed and she drifted off. With every rise and fall of her chest I counted the seconds until she would awake again so I could start making up for my sins against her.

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**A/N I hope that was as good as i wanted it to be...I'm happy that's he back...all is well in the world...for now.**

**Please please please review and let me know how i did...This chapter..the reconciliation meant alot to me and i was really stressing over trying to make it worthy of the situation.**

**Thanks to all my faithful readers..I do this mainly for you!  
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	41. Reunited and it Feels so Goo

**A/N I apologize for the delay in updating. The holidays were nutty and i was busy and packing and moving the weekend after Christmas!**

**So...after all the drama drama drama....this is a complete fluff chapter down to its Snuggle filled title. I tried to add some humorous moments as well as some sweet moments so I hope you enjoy it!**

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****Reunited and It Feels so Good**

**EPoV**

A subdued silence filled the room as I watched the rise and fall of Bella's chest as she slept. I had a lot to think about as she slept, and decided that my brooding around about what I had done wouldn't help either of us. I needed to get things back to the way they were, if not better, as fast as possible if I had any hope of her not turning away from me.

I had spent an hour with my ear to her heart, letting its gentle rhythm lull me into a trance before I heard Charlie get up and shuffle past her bedroom to the stairs. His mind was filled with thoughts of how he hadn't slept so well in months and it wasn't until he got all the way into the kitchen that the thought occurred to him that she might not be home. He ran up the stairs two at a time and between his speed and my not being able to tear myself from Bella's side, I didn't have a chance to jump out the window as I normally would. Just as Charlie turned the knob I leapt over the bed, landing soundlessly behind the door as it swung open.

"Bella you better be…oh there you are…."

Bella popped up from the bed, her eyes frantically searching the room for me. Our eyes met and her mouth literally fell open when she saw me snickering from behind the door.

"Dad, what the hell?" she finally said.

"You were so quiet last night I thought you might have snuck out. And watch your language young lady."

"Sorry…geez…couldn't you have at least knocked first." She tried not to draw attention to me by looking my way but my laughing at her wasn't helping. Her face turned a delicious shade a red as she pulled the blankets over herself and glared at her father.

"Sorry, you're right I should have knocked. Come down to eat, we need to talk anyway."  
She nodded and as Charlie turned to leave I pulled the door all the way open and he walked out completely oblivious to the fact that I was standing behind him the whole time. As soon as the door was closed, Bella tossed a pillow at me.

"Have you lost your mind? What if he saw you?" she asked in a harsh whisper.

"I don't know. I guess I'd have to kill him…" Again her mouth dropped open and she blinked a few time before cracking a smile.

"Still trying to do the scary vampire bit?" she laughed and held out her hands for me which I gladly took and kissed.

"Love, it's not a bit…its what I am." I smiled down at her as I pushed her on to her back. Her eyes widened for second before she pulled her bottom lip into her mouth craning her neck up towards me. I leaned down over her, inhaling her scent, becoming mesmerized by her all over again.

"I missed hearing you call me that." she whispered

"I missed calling you that." I leaned in closer to her neck and ran my hand along her side. I could feel her quivering beneath me and her tell-tale heart speeding up as my hand rose higher and higher. She reached her hands up bringing them to the small of my back, attempting to pull me closer to her. I could smell her arousal, thick in the air like a fog around me, and my mouth unexpectedly pooled with venom. I swallowed but the venom kept rushing as her scent became stronger and stronger. Bella's body twisted beneath me as she brought her hips up rubbing herself against my straining erection.

"Bella…Love…" I tired to speak but the venom was rushing into my mouth too fast. I turned my head away from her and she flopped back against the bed.

"Edward are you okay?" she panted out, rubbing my arms.  
"Yea…I'm fine…I'm sorry Bella. I just…I need to get used to that again." She pulled herself up from underneath me and ran her fingers through my hair.  
"Love, Charlie _is _waiting downstairs for you and he's growing a little impatient." I chuckled at his grumbling thoughts and Bella groaned swinging her legs out of the bed.

"Ugh…I might as well get this over with." Before she could step away I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to face me. From my kneeling position we were eye level. I stared deep into hers, placing my hands on her waist and pulled her closer to me.

"Besides, when we finally do it again…I want the time to worship your body that I've missed so much, Bel_la. I don't want anyone around to hear when I make you scream my name." I exhaled into her face and her breath hitched in her throat before she stepped back clearly "dazzled". A surge of her arousal saturated the air and a smile crept on her face.

"You so don't play fair Cullen," she said before stumbling out the door.

I lay back on the bed drowning in the scent which was my Bella that was infused in her sheets. I could smell faint traces of mutt and the images of her and Jacob in his car flashed through my head. This turned into thoughts of them rolling around in her bed and I heard myself growling and clenched and unclenched my fists trying to regain composure before my silent-minded love got back up the stairs.

Bella walked into the room with a smile plastered on face, which I found odd because she and Charlie had argued the whole time they talked, but she smiled anyway coming back to sit on the edge of the bed and rested her chin on her hands on my chest. Her deep brown eyes stared back up at me and as I stared back at her, my hands caressed her face.

"Edward…not that I'm not more than happy to see you….but since your back…does that mean everyone else is coming back too?" she breathed out. Her eyes were closed and she was leaning into my hand.

"I'm not sure Love. When Rose finally convinced me to come back to Forks I was too excited at the thought of seeing you to ask. I suppose at least Alice will if she isn't back already." Bella's eyes widened in what I thought was anticipation but when she spoke I found it was shock.

"Rosalie convinced you to come back?"

"Ugh… yeah. Believe it or not it was actually Rose that got through to me."

"Geez…remind me to send her some flowers or something," she chuckled and then reached up to grab my face to kiss me again. Her lips pressed firmly to mine as I held her by the back her head and around her waist. She wiggled her way on top of me smirking into my mouth as her stomach grazed against my freshly engorged cock. I pulled her into me and we both groaned from the feel of our bodies pressed against each other.

"Love, maybe you should go get dressed before we get ourselves into trouble. A few more seconds of this and the fact that Charlie is downstairs will not stop me from ravishing you."

"I'm glad to see your want for me hasn't changed. For a while I thought that I wasn't…well you know… "_good_" enough for you". Bella turned her face away, her cheeks tinged pink from embarrassment.

"Love" I said pulling her face back towards me. "It is I who is not good enough for you. But for whatever reason you love me…and well who am I to argue with that. I'm just glad to see that even with our time apart you can fall so comfortably back into place with me. Under normal circumstances…" Bella put her finger on my lips silencing me and moved to straddle my waist.

"Edward…when has anything we've ever done or been through been under "normal" circumstances? Besides, we've wasted enough time not being together. I don't see any reason why we should pussy-foot around. I just love you…and I just want to be with you. Nothing else matters. Got that?"

"Nothing?" I asked her raising an eyebrow. She stared into my eyes intently before mouthing nothing.  
"What about Jacob?" I asked her. Secretly I wanted to know for my own benefit but I could tell that she hadn't thought about him once since she opened her eyes and saw my face. She scrunched her face moving off my lap.

"Shit! What the hell am I going to tell him…Sam's already up my ass…He probably already knows you're here…What the hell am I going to do?" She nervously ran her fingers through her hair and paced back and forth before I grabbed her arms to stop her.

"Bella….who is Sam…and what do you means he's up your ass?" She looked up at me with watery eyes and I could smell hints of fear flowing from her. I pulled her close to me and she wrapped her arms around my waist and told me about Sam following her and questioning her about us. Needless to say I was beyond pissed that someone held shaken her so badly.

"Edward, they say they can kill you. Is it true? Do they know some way to hurt you?"

"Yes Bella, it is true. The Quileutes possess a certain…quality I should say…that allows them to be strong enough to kill us. But before you go any further…it is part of our treaty with them that I not speak what that quality is so don't ask…I don't want to hide anything from you…but it isn't my place to say. Violating the terms of the treaty would cause a fight…and apparently its not just La Push Alice can't see. It's…the group as a whole."

Bella stepped back from me wiping her eyes and turned towards her dresser. "Let me go get dressed and let's get out of here. It not unlike Jacob to just show up and if things are how you say they are…I just…I don't want to deal with this right now. I'm too friggin happy that you're back to let anything or anyone kill my buzz." She opened her drawer digging out that same little yellow towel and grabbed the flowers from the dresser. "Thanks. They're beautiful." She kissed me on the cheek and ran to shower.

Sam had violated the terms of our treaty…but I would let it go for now. So many things needed to be dealt with already and I hadn't even been back for a whole day. I sat on Bella's window sill waiting for her when my phone began to vibrate in my pocket. It was Rosalie texting me:

**_Alice saw…need to deal b4 it gets out of hand. Want you to be happy. Call when you can._**

I text her back: **_Wait it out. No need to act now. Hasn't told anything she didn't know. Don't want a fight. _**

She answered back: **_Happy for you anyway. Surprise at home. Get there soon._**

Bella came back in the room glistening from the water just as I was sticking my phone back in my pocket. I watched her dress in overly warm clothes and took it that we wouldn't be driving.

"Miss the speed hunh?"  
"I don't want to risk running into anyone on the road. Not until we figure out how we're gonna tell Charlie that your back."  
"I'm sure he'll here about it once I'm back in school."  
"You're going back to school?" she asked all excited and I smirked, ghosting to her side and placed a kiss behind her ear.

"Of course I am. For one thing I can't bear to be away from you that long and two; I need a current graduation date if we're going to go to college together." Her smile beamed up at me and I wrapped my arms around her pulling her up for a kiss. I couldn't get enough of her lips and when I felt her tongue tentatively slip out to touch mine, I staggered backwards into the wall. I let her play for a moment, enjoying the sound of her low moan before pulling away.

"We should get going, Bella. Meet me out back." I dropped her to her feet and she ran towards her door while I slipped from the window. I heard her footsteps padding down the stairs and once the screen door slid open, I dropped from the tree and pulled her into my arms in one fluid motion. She wrapped her arms around my neck, nuzzling her face in the collar of my shirt and squeezed me tight, as was our sign that she was ready to go. I took off slower than usual at first, giving Bella a moment to adjust but then she gripped me tighter with her legs and I moved faster, jumping over logs and the brook that eventually led to my house.

Upon approaching I slowed down to a walk and Bella lifted her face breathing softly in my ear.

"God I love that," she said before nipping at my ear with her teeth. I could here the steady stream of thoughts coming from the house. The whole family had returned. Alice was jumping up and down on the back porch with Emmett and Esme right behind her

_Hurry the hell up Edward; I've been waiting all day!_ Alice thought. I smirked lowering Bella to her feet and taking her hand.

"I have a surprise for you Love." I said pulling her towards the house. Her heart rate sped up as the house and a jumping pixie came into view.

"She's back! They're back!" Bella asked me excitedly. She looked towards Alice and then back at me and then our hands, unwilling to let me go.

"Go ahead Love. I've had all night and morning with you, she's been waiting." Bella kissed my hand before taking off in a stumbling run and Alice leapt from the porch and took off running it seemed before her feet even hit the ground. She flashed over to Bella and the two of them squealed and embraced each other. Tiny Alice lifted Bella from the ground swinging her in a circle before screaming how much she missed her. Emmett and Esme followed behind, Emmett grabbing her and tossing her in the air and then catching her in a bear hug. He dropped her to her feet and she stumbled over to Esme who grabbed her in a hug and planted a kiss right on the top of her head.

"We've missed you so much Bella. You have no idea."  
"Not as much as I missed you!" Bella retorted beaming up at her. For the first time in months I felt completely complete. It felt like everything was the way it should be. My _whole_ family was together again. I followed them into the house where Carlisle and Jasper were waiting with hugs and smiles for her. Rosalie stepped off the staircase and met my eyes before looking at Bella. _See I told you Edward. Its nice to see you smiling again._

Once Bella noticed Rose standing in the room she broke from Carlisle's embrace and I could smell the tears falling from her face before I saw them. She jumped at Rosalie, throwing her arms around her neck and cried in to her shoulder.

"I don't know how to thank you Rosalie. I owe you…I owe you so much. Thank you for whatever you said to get him to come back…thank you for coming back with him…Just thank you thank you thank you." Rosalie let her have her hysterics for a moment before pushing her back.

"It wasn't only for you Bella, and I'm sure you know how to thank me." I tried to jump into her thoughts and saw that she was thinking about a promise but when I looked at her, she blocked me with a particularly vulgar picture of Emmett's junk. I instantly shuddered and for the moment that I couldn't meet her eyes she left the room then the house.

I followed the entourage in the living room and sat stroking Bella's hand as she talked with everyone. There were lots of apologies being thrown around and I felt guiltier by the moment. Apparently Bella could sense this because she repeatedly squeezed my hand reassuringly. A few times I tried to catch Alice's attention to let her know that I wanted alone with Bella but she was deliberately ignoring me. I slowly came to the decision that if she didn't stop talking I was going to tackle her so she would be sure to see it, and seeing as though I was the fastest in the house she knew I would be able to. She laughed out loud, shaking her and stood, pulling Jasper to his feet.

"Apparently Edward is going to grow violent if we don't let them alone for awhile. We should hunt, and Carlisle you should get down to the hospital. They are waiting for you." Everyone gave a laugh and a smirk at me before getting up.

"What?" I asked shrugging my shoulders. "I'm sure you all have important things to do. Besides , she's not…we're not going anywhere. There will be plenty of time for you to talk about toenail polish and handbags…or whatever it is that you girls talk about." I directed my last comment towards Alice who was looking Bella over and hating on the coat she was wearing.

"Hmmm…yea…I'm sensing a much needed shopping trip coming on in the next few days Swan. I'll let you roll around with my brother for now but in a 3 days you are mine. Besides, I need a new back-to-school wardrobe." Bella audibly groaned hiding her face in my shoulder.

"That... I did not miss," she chuckled out and Alice tossed a pillow at her, hitting her in the head. I stood lifting Bella with me and we headed up the stairs. I noticed the house was much cleaner than when I first got here and on passing the kitchen saw that Esme had taken to scrubbing the kitchen floor. I met her eyes for a moment and she smiled at me.

_Careful Edward. No need to rush. I know the urge is strong but you've only been back for a day._

"Mom….God…is that all you guys think about?" I whined. She leaned back on her heels and laughed, shaking her head. "Sorry, but you know…I'm just saying…"

"Yeah…yeah… you're just saying." I laughed nudging Bella up the stairs.  
"What was that about?"  
"You don't want to know." We walked into my room and Bella quickly gripped my hand and turned into me. I wrapped my arms around her pulling her towards the couch and she shuddered in my arms, fighting back tears.

"Love what's the matter? Why are you crying."  
"Its just…I remembered the last time I was here and….it just hurt so bad." She moved closer to me wrapping her arms around my neck and pulled herself into my lap.

"It's been a long time since we've been together okay. Lets have no more tears. I'm here now. I'm never leaving you again."  
"You said that last time Edward."  
"I know what its like to live with you, and I know what its like to live without you. I can't…I can't do this alone. I need you Isabella Swan…call me selfish if you want…but I need you and I won't be without you. You're stuck with me so I hope you're happy."  
"As happy as a pig in shit, Edward Cullen."

Bella and I spent the next few hours just sitting and talking to each other. Although we couldn't keep our hands to ourselves, we kept it pg-13 for the time being. I wanted her badly but I didn't want her to feel like that's all I wanted. I could hear everyone buzzing around the house and tried to block out the thoughts of them mulling over the situation with the Quileutes.

_We'll deal with this when Bella isn't around to be safe. We'll eventually need a full story from her but now isn't the time. Enjoy your reunion son._ Carlisle thought to me from his office. None of them particularly wanted a fight, so given that Bella already knew about us, we didn't see that as provocation to act.

I closed my eyes as Bella's warm hands traced my features. Grabbing her wrist I brought it to my face, taking in as much of her scent as I could before opening my eyes to speak to her.

"Bella, what promise did you make to Rosalie?" She gulped and slid off of my lap turning away from me.

"Edward, you have your secrets that you can't tell me for good reasons. I also have mine. I made a promise to her, and as I am grateful for her convincing you to come back to me…it would be wrong of me to break her trust. I don't like keeping secrets from you anymore than you like keeping them from me…so please don't ask…because I can't and won't tell you." I could tell from the conviction in her voice that she was serious. I could also tell from the look in her eyes that she was thinking about what ever that secret was and when bit into her bottom lip, I cursed her silent mind for like the umpteenth time since I met her.

"Okay Bella, I'll respect that. But if it's something important…I think I should know. Can you at least tell me when this promise was made?" She shook her head and glared at me.

"Drop it Edward. I won't tell you. I want your sister to like me. Me breaking my promise isn't going to help my cause. You don't want to fight with the Quileutes….I don't want to fight with her." I laughed and nodded in agreement with her and she reached out to stroke my face.

"I'm so glad you're back" she breathed out and then scrunched up her face and twisted on the couch. Her phone was vibrating in her back pocket for what had to be the 12th time since we gotten here.

"Bella why don't you just answer it already? He obviously going to stop calling until you speak to him."

She sighed, reaching into her pocket and moved from the couch. I watched in utter amazement as she sprinted to my bathroom, shut the door…..and turned on the water…..to drown out the sound of their conversation. Fury and jealously burned in my chest as I could only hear her low voice in murmurs and none of his side of the conversation over all the noise. She was, from the sound of her voice, also standing in my shower with the doors closed. I felt like busting in there, ripping the phone from her hands, and screaming into it "fuck off" but I knew I had no place. Something had transpired between them in my absence and I suppose I owed it to him to at least let Bella be the one to say it.

After 5 minutes and an increasingly growing impatience burning inside me Bella emerged from the bathroom frowning momentarily, and then smiling when she met my eyes.

"Did I mention that I love you?" She skipped back over to my landing cautiously in my lap. I wrapped my arms around her waist pulling her closer into my chest and buried my face in her hair. "I'm sure you mentioned it once or twice." I tickled her rib cage and her light laughter made my cold heart swell. Her cooing made me completely forget the conversation she had just had. It felt so good to be back here, just enjoying my time with her that I almost didn't notice Alice's nagging thoughts.

_Charlie's getting out of work early. It's time to get Bella home and I don't think now is a good time for him to see you two together. _

I groaned out loud, loud enough for her to hear and continued to nuzzle Bella's neck and chest while she squealed. My decision not to move sparked a vision in Alice's mind and I grimaced watching a tear-streaked red in the face shouting Bella, screaming at an equally angry Charlie at the bottom of their staircase. The last thing I wanted to do was cause them more stress than I already had, so I lifted Bella to her feet pointing out the window.

"It's getting late Love. Alice see's Charlie getting off work early and being very pissed at not finding you home."  
"Hmmmm….you're right. I should get home now. He'll be expecting dinner."

"If you lived here, you'd be home now." She looked up at me with shocked eyes and I couldn't tell what had compelled me to say those words to her.  
"You're right. I would," she replied quietly, slipping her shoes back on. Her cheeks flushed red and although I had managed to keep my thirst at bay for most of the day, her blushing this close to me sent the urges rushing through me. I stepped closer to her and pulled her into my by the small of her back and leaned into her. She stood still in my arms allowing me to run my nose along the contours of her face and down to her neck. Fire raged in my throat but I fought hard to control it. The way she was pressed up against me was only egging on my excitement and I knew I wouldn't last much longer not being able to _be_ with her. My body ached for her and from her labored breathing I knew she felt the same.

"How…how…long do you think it's going to take? I think I may go crazy if we have to start from scratch again."  
"Hopefully not long. I just don't want things to be like they were the last time. I cant imagine hurting you in any way, shape, or form Love. Be patient. It'll pay off in the end. I promise." Bella ran her fingers through my hair before pulling me in for one more kiss.

"I certainly hope not. It's like my body knows that you're near me and it just wants you. I'm going crazy over here and we've done nothing but kiss. I may have to resort to relieving myself." She stared up into my eyes from beneath her lashes with a devilish grin on her face and I nearly ripped her clothes off in that second. Images of her kneeling in front of me, impaled on her own fingers flashed through my mind.

"I would love to see that," I growled at her before crushing my lips to hers with such passion that it sent us both staggering back onto the couch.

We kissed in a frenzy, tearing at each others clothes and just as I was pulling Bella's shirt over her head, my bedroom door swung open.

"Unless you want an epic battle with your father tonight, I suggest you get home Bella." Esme growled at the both of us, but with a huge smile on her face. I saw what she was seeing through her mind and had to laugh as well. Bella's shirt was turned inside out covering her face but she was turned towards Esme, clearly alert to where the voice was coming from. Esme flitted from the room still laughing, muttering something about teenagers and hormones as I helped Bella right her clothing.

"Well that was embarrassing."  
"Trust me she's seen worse. Imagine walking in the house to Emmett's big pale ass banging Rosalie bent over on the couch, with some lame HBO soft porn playing on the flat screen." Bella's face turned beet red and we both busted out laughing when we got downstairs and saw both Rose and Em on said couch watching said flat screen.

"What's so funny?" Emmett asked as we walked past him. Bella and I just looked at each other, cracked a smile shaking out heads, and turned to towards him at the same time answering.

"Nothing." We broke out into fits of laughter again and then Bella said her goodbyes to the family before I tossed her onto my back and sprinted her home. We got to the house 5 minutes before Charlie did and I waited patiently in Bella's room while she ate dinner with him and answer a barrage of questions of why she ignored Jacob all day. She kept swearing nothing had happened between them the other night that would have turned her off to him. Meanwhile I was thinking how I hoped what had happened hadn't turned her on to him. I was seething with jealousy by the time she came back upstairs and changed for bed.

"This is nice. Having you in here waiting for me again. I know you probably hate it."

"Nope. I'd wait 1000 years if I had to…but I know you wouldn't make me wait that long. You're just as much of a feign as I am." Bella nestled into my arms, pressing her ass against me and I slowly started to grind against her. I could feel myself growing harder by the mili-second as her breathing became more ragged. She pressed back into me harder, letting her head fall back against my chest. The muscles in her neck strained and I could almost see the blood rushing through them

Bella let out a soft moan and attempted to pull my hand from her hip around to her stomach. I allowed her too, reveling in the feeling of her warm and soft skin. She moaned again as I snaked my hand beneath her shirt and slid my fingers along the underside of her breasts. She shuttered against me, turning her face towards me for a kiss and I leaned in towards hers hoping that by concentrating on her lips I could keep my mind off what I really wanted to do. It wasn't working. I felt a tightness in my stomach and my hunger for both her body and her blood flared up, setting fire to me. I pulled away from her, leaving her panting and leaning against my hands.

"That's enough…too much for tonight Love. Get some sleep. We've got school tomorrow." She sighed as her breathing and heart-rate returned to normal and she turned towards me, nestling herself against me.

"After all this time…I still get totally lightheaded when you touch me. I hope to God that never goes away."

"I do too Bella. I do too."

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**A/N So like i said total fluff chapter. After the epic reunion i wanted some wind down time before i spiced things back up and returned to the lemon tart which is my story. Trust when i say i will be squeezing lemon juice out of every moment that i can, some closing drama drama will ensue...to set up for the sequel that i am contemplating writing...but we'll see**

**Be sure to check out my other story i just posted True Loves Way. It's Edward and Rosalie one-shot...just and idea i had floating around in my head and i want to know what you guys think....**

**As always thanks to all my readers....new and old....I do this for you and a special thanks to a friend Content1....your encouragement has been a great help. Be sure to check out her work as she is an amazing writer!  
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	42. Monday Monday Monday

**A/N So yea....I enjoyed writing this chapter so much that I put up with the smell of the dead mouse that is currently in the wall behind my computer. I hope that shows how dedicated I am to this story and how dedicated i am to my fans....so for the love of God...please enjoy and review this...I think I deserve it... :(**

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****Monday Monday Monday**

**BPoV**

I woke up Monday morning fretting their return to school. There was no doubt that everyone and their mother would have something to say and that Charlie would be made aware of their return by the time I went to lunch.

As I drove to school with a pounding heart, it dawned on me that it would only be a matter of time before Sam and his goons found out…and Jacob. I felt a tightness in my chest when I thought of how I had lied to him the day before and knew that he'd know soon enough. I couldn't stand the thought of hurting him but all my thoughts seemed to fly right out of my truck window when I reached the school and saw Edwards shiny silver Volvo parked next to an empty space. I couldn't help running into his arms and although I knew everyone was staring with gaping mouths, we ignored them and kissed like we hadn't seen each other in months even though it had only been an hour.

The rest of the day went faster than I expected. I wasn't surprised to see that Edward had finagled his way into all but two of my classes and that was only because I begged him not to take gym with me and he was in a more advanced math class. Sure people had their snide comments, Angela just looked shocked, and Jessica and Lauren who had tormented me relentlessly about his leaving just sat there looking stupid and green in the face. I on the other hand couldn't have been any happier if I tried.

That was until Edward and I pulled on to my street and he pulled over at the corner.  
"What's the matter?" I turned to him looking confused then worried. I was expecting to see Sam run out in to the street, instead Edward pointed to my house and I saw Charlie's cruiser in the driveway.

"He's waiting for you. He knows that I'm back and he isn't happy about it at all." I groaned audibly and turned to face him.

"Couldn't we just go to your house then? I don't know that I'm ready to deal with this yet."  
"It's better to just get it over with Bella. All he's going to say is that he wants you to stay away from me. You're 18 now, he can't really tell you what to do." Edward brushed his thumb over my lip and I moved closer so he could kiss me.

"Besides, Charlie is a man of integrity. I'm sure he would respect his elders and since I'm technically old enough to be _his_ father then I'll just tell him to cut his crap and leave you be." Before I could even respond Edward busted out laughing and moved to get out of the car. His beautiful smile put me at ease and I couldn't help thinking how I liked the fact that he wasn't brooding around. He seemed just as happy to be back together as I was. I slid over into the driver's seat and leaned out the window kissing him once more.

"So are you gonna wait upstairs for me?"  
"I think I'll go home for a minute…maybe have a quick bite before I come over." He winked at me, running his hand through my hair and I grabbed his wrist before I could walk away. Anxiety flushed through me quickly at the thought of him not being around.

"What's the matter Love?"

"I…nothing…its nothing. I'm being irrational is all. I'll call you when I'm done talking to Charlie and you'll come over right?"

"Right away. I'll stay close to your house after I drop all this crap off at home…I suppose I should do this homework but..."

"You can do it later at my house when I go to sleep. It'll give you something to do." Edward raised his eyebrow at me and then pecked me on the lips.  
"Okay Bella. I'll see you in a little while." I watched him walk away and he waved back at me before turning the corner. I missed him already and sped the 15 feet to my house just so I could get the argument that I knew was coming over with so we could be together again.

"I don't even think I have to say what you know I'm gonna say!" came Charlie's booming voice from the kitchen as soon as I got in the house. I sighed heavily, hung up my coat, and then turned ready to argue but as soon as I turned around Charlie was standing in the doorway red as a fire hydrant.

"And I don't want any argument about it. Your mother feels the same way. That…that boy is no good for you. You stay away from him!" I had never seen Charlie this angry. It was startling to say the least and I was so flustered that I couldn't form a coherent response.

"Do you hear what I'm saying to you Bella? That boy is not welcome in my home, if you see him in school you go the other way…if he sits next to you in class you sit somewhere else. Do you hear me?"

All I could do was glare back at him. I wasn't used to being told what to do…there was never any need for it and now I could see where that "teenage rebellion" came from. I turned away from him stomping towards the stairs but Charlie grabbed my arm before I could get up the stairs.

"I mean it Bella. He doesn't deserve to even look at you after what he did. You stay the hell away from him."

"Don't tell me what to do!" I spat at him and ripped my arm away. I ran up the stairs angry and feeling like I was going to explode and as soon as I got in my room, as if on cue, my phone rang.

"What!" I yelled into it. Jacob's startled yet peeved voice came in on the other end and I felt like throwing the phone against the wall. I wasn't ready to deal with him yet.

"I'm pretty sure you know why I'm calling. I think that we should meet. We need to talk. Come down to La Push."  
"No Jacob. If you want to talk to me come here. I don't want to deal with Sam or any of your other friends."

"Bella, this isn't about them…or the Cullens…It's about me and you…and well…I guess one of them." I growled into the phone and was ready to hang up when I remembered what Edward told me just minutes before. I told Jacob I would meet him and while I was on my way down called Edward to tell him where I was going. At first he was upset but made me promise that I would come right to his house afterwards and that I would be extra careful…for whatever reason.

When I got to Jacob's house he was sitting on his porch waiting for me. The air was thick with tension between us that he tried to diffuse with a smirk but this time it didn't work. I was in too foul a mood.

"Okay, I'm here. Talk." Jacob stood, towering over me and held out his arms.  
"I missed you, Bella." He wrapped his arms around me and I returned his hug, instantly feeling guilty for being so short with him. He hadn't done anything yet, and didn't deserve my attitude.

"I…um missed you too Jake."  
"Did you really? Or are you just saying that because I said it." I was speechless as he looked down at me but then he started to laugh.

"Shut up. Why did you want me to come down here?"  
"Because Cullen can't and I figured this would be the best place to talk about what you're going to tell him since he cant eavesdrop outside _my_ window." Jacob's warm hand covered mine and he pulled me around to the back of the house where his makeshift garage was. We walked in and he shut the door behind, turning on a space heater so that I wouldn't freeze.

"What do you mean what I'm going to tell him Jake? Tell him about what?" He didn't answer me, just sat down on his stool and pulled me onto his lap. I froze, not understanding what was going on until he pulled my head towards him and tried to kiss me. When I pushed off him he looked up at me hurt and confused.

"What happened to something new? If this is about other night Bella, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so pushy. I mean you were into it…I thoughts that's what you wanted."

I was suddenly starting to feel dizzy and sat on the floor across from him. Tears started to well in my eyes and I didn't know how to say so I blurted out the first thing that popped in my head.

"Edward came back for me Jacob. He…we're….I was with him yesterday when I said I was with Angela. I'm sorry that I lied to you but I didn't know how to tell you." I looked up at him from under my lashes feeling guilty. His body was slightly trembling and he backed the stool away from me swallowing hard.

"I knew something was up. You didn't have to lie to me Bella. His being back…I knew you would see him at some point. Tell me what happened…what did he say…what did he do to you."

"Jacob…why do you always assume he's trying to hurt me? Edward loves me…that's why he came back…because he was just as miserable as I was." Jacob shut his eyes backing away from me further. I started to worry if Sam's temper was rubbing off on him when he shot up, looming over me.

"Bella, what are you going to tell him?" He looked so hurt and angry that I couldn't bear to say what I needed. My words came out in a painful whisper.

"It isn't about what I'm going to tell him Jacob…It's more so what I'm going to tell you." Jacobs body was trembling harder and he stalked to the other side of the room and gripped the edge of his work bench.

"So I take it you're just going to go running back to your blood-sucking leech…after everything we've been through…you're just going to go back to him."

"Jacob…I love him. I'm in love with him. I can't….be with anyone else."

"You were happy with me Bella, how can you say that."

I stared at Jacob for a moment. He has stopped trembling and there was a hurt in his eyes that I couldn't bear to look at, but the look on his face wasn't even a tenth of the mirror images of myself that I remembered. In my moment of silence Jacob crossed the room and wrapped his arms me holding me tightly. Heat was radiating uncomfortably from him and I squirmed trying to get away but he held me tighter.

"Bella, don't do this. I know you better than anyone. Don't throw your life away for him when you can have one with me."

"No Jake, you don't know me…if you did…if you did then you would know that I was slowly splitting at the seams .I was falling apart and barely breathing with a broken heart that was still beating but that was it….I wasn't empty. If you knew me then you would know that I wasn't happy. I love you Jake…but not like that…Not like I love Edward….And I can't make myself love you if I don't…trust me I tried…I really really tried for you and for Charlie. But…I was at the point where you say you're getting better but you don't feel any better…and you just say it because you know you're hurting the people around you. If you knew me then you would have seen that…you would have seen that I was feigning for you every sign of life."

I stepped away tears now flowing from my eyes blurring my vision. I slumped back against the wall and Jake stepped to me. He rested his hands on my waist pulling my lower body closer to him. I could feel him leaning towards me and thought he was going to try and kiss me again but he whispered low in my ear.

"Maybe you don't love me now but you'll grow to love me even more."

"No Jake. I love him. I love Edward." Jacob stepped away from me with a look of contempt on his face. He was taking on an air of Sam and for the first time since I had known Jacob, I was afraid of him.

"What's wrong with you Bella? You do realize that you are "in love" with a corpse. He's a monster Bella. That makes you one sick broad."

"Jacob…don't be mean. I didn't come here to hurt you. You've been my best friend forever. Don't let this ruin it." Jacob turned away from me laughing, his body trembling faster and harder than it was before.

"You hurt me…I can't wait until you come crying to me that he hurt you…I don't see what the point in you being with him is anyway… It's not like he can do this" Jacobs last words were muffled on my face when he grabbed me roughly and pushed me against the wall. His lips came crashing down on mine, his tongue probing my mouth almost choking me. He pushed his knee between my legs so that I was basically sitting on him and his trembling body sent vibrations all the way through to my core. I got lost for a moment…lost in the hundreds of sensations that I seemed to be feeling before I managed to push him away. Jacob stepped back laughing haughtily as I rested my hands on my knees trying to catch my breath.

"Bella, there's more to a relationship than holding hands you know…what I just did to you…what we did in the car…He could never…"

"Really Jacob, that's nothing compared to what Edward and I have done!" I shouted back at him angrily.  
"You mean to tell me you actually had sex with him Bella? Are you out of your mind…that's disgusting?"

I was seething now. I balled up my fists ready to shout back at him when he silenced me with his tongue once again. I struggled to pull away but he pulled my hands behind my back causing me to arch my back against him. He ran his hand gently up my side, stopping to slowly run his hand gently over my breast. My body was rebelling, shuddering against him. I could feel myself getting wet and mentally kicked myself in the ass. Jacob stopped abruptly, pulling his face away and looking down at me with a shit eating grin on his face.

"You mean to tell me…he can do better than that? You really expect me to believe that he feels…smells…tastes…better than me?"

Still trying to catch my breath I panted out a response, but through my labored breathing it was unintelligible. Jacob whispered in my ear for me to repeat myself before trailing kisses from behind my ear to my collar bone.

"HE TASTES LIKE YOU ONLY SWEETER!" I shouted in his ear.

The next 7 seconds of my life seemed to happen all at once. Jacob's body heat spiked to practically burning where he touched me, his body shook violently and he pushed me hard towards the floor. I felt like I was falling in slow motion and on the way down I saw him turn away from me quickly and scraps of cloth flying through the air. As soon as I landed…my brain refused to believe what it was seeing, yet my adrenaline kicked in over drive and I crawled away quickly and threw myself to my feet. I didn't look back. I just ran. I ran for dear life out of the garage and then the next thing I saw was Jake's house blurring past me.

I ran past my truck, my body not letting me stop and before I knew it was running up the middle of the highway towards Edwards's house.

**EPoV**

My Bella had exposed me to many a new emotion. Most of them I reveled in, not believing that I was able to even feel these things. A few of them…I didn't care for. First came jealousy… and that was a bitch to feel, but the worst of all had to be impatience. For someone to whom time means next to nothing…impatience is torture.

I was patient in the beginning, flying through the stupid homework assignments that took me all of 20 minutes to do. And then I tried playing my guitar but on seeing Alice's thoughts…she still was away from him yet. I tried not to let my mind wander to what could be keeping her but worry and jealousy were wracking through me so much so that for no apparent reason, Jasper barreled into my room and tackled me. I wrestled with him for a moment just to pass time…but things were starting to get ridiculous. Out of nowhere Alice flew into my room pulling Jasper off of me with one hand and grabbing my shirt with the other.

"GO!" she screamed!

I was stricken with fear for a split second when Alice showed me Bella running up the middle of the highway. The fright on her face was so clear that I unconsciously snarled before leaping to my feet jumping outt from my glass doorway. I could hear Alice shouting for Emmett and Jasper to follow us and then took off at full speed through the woods.

I closed the space between Bella and I as fast as my legs would carry me and didn't even bother to stop. Instead I zipped through traffic and grabbed her, crossing to the other side. She screamed loudly before I set her down on her feet. She took one look at me before bursting into tears and tried to throw her arms around my neck.

"Bella! What happened!" I said shaking her so she would calm down. She took a step back, frantically shaking her head.  
"Bella, you're killing me! What happened to you?"

"Jacob…he…and then his clothes…and I don't even know…what the hell….Edward….what the fuck is going on!" She sank to her knees in front of me and I went with her. I let her cry from a moment and held my hand out to Alice who had come up from behind.

"_Looks like the monkey's out of the bottle." _Emmett thought, taking a defensive stance in front of us. Jasper crouched at our other side, searching the area. _I don't smell anything Edward. I don't think she was followed._

"Bella, love what happened down there? Did…he…did you see…what he is?"  
"I…can't…believe this. I grew up with him…I've known him since we were in diapers for fuck's sake."

"I know Bella, I'm sorry. Let's get you back to the house. I'll explain everything…and I'll keep you safe. Don't worry about a thing." She nodded, reaching her arms up to take a hold of my neck. I tossed her onto my back and we took off back to the house. The whole time I wanted to gag from the wet dog smell that was covering her, Alice shook her head at me.

"_Just don't breathe it in…and please take her in through your room. No need to drag that smell through the whole house." _

When we arrived back at the house, everyone had come home. Esme made Bella tea and Alice nicely suggested that Bella take a shower and change, that it would help her calm down. I was given the liberty of explaining the situation to her, and as I waited for her to come out of the bathroom I realized I had no idea of how to explain things to her.

Bella emerged from the bathroom, still wet from the water. From across the room she looked deep into my eyes and a small blush crept onto her face. She turned away slowly walking towards the bed and crawled into it by way of arching her back and sticking her ass in the air. I wanted to believe that she wasn't purposely trying to entice me but then she lets out the softest sigh, sliding her body against the sheets. From my position on the couch I could see that her shirt had been pushed up, exposing the creamy skin of her side. I had the overwhelming urge to touch her, kiss her, hold her in my arms and crossed the room in one step.

"Edward…I'm sure that you have some lengthy explanation for just what the hell is going on here. I'm sure its going to confuse the hell out me, make me question everything I've ever thought to be true…but if it's okay with you…If you can…I would really like you to just hold me."

"Okay Bella, anything you want." I lay down on my back and she crawled over top of me pushing my shirt up in the process. Once our bodies touched, she sighed again, this time more heavily and twisted the ends of my shirt in her hands. We lay like that for a few moments, and from the sound of erratic heartbeat I knew that she was just trying to calm herself down. Quietly she recounted everything that happened from her argument with Charlie up to when she started running. When she recounted the part where Jacob had pawed at her I had to use all of my restraint to not run down there and rip his head off.

When she was done, I told her everything she needed to know about our pact with the Quileutes, and their capabilities. She took things almost as easy as she had when I told her about myself and my family. When I was finished she sat up and looked at me. Tears welled in her eyes and she turned her face away from me. I sat up, pulling her close to me and kissed her tears away all the while trying to assure her that everything would be okay.

"Edward…I'm not crying about the fact that Jacob is wolf…that I could handle and the fact that you're a vampire…..that I can handle. That what the problem is. I'm literally living in a nightmare…and I'm okay with it. Something has to be wrong with me. I can't connect with regular people the way I can with well…people like you. Jacob's been my best friend forever, Alice…I love her to death…and you….I can't live with out you…Jacob is right…something is wrong with me. I'm..a… freak."

"Bella, Love you aren't a freak. Love you're beautiful and there's nothing wrong with you. It's me Bella…I'm the freak…but thank you for loving me…because you're doing it perfectly. The fact that you can look past what I am…what we all are…and still love…That makes you amazing."

I turned her face towards me so she could see the sincerity in my eyes as I spoke. Her bottom lip started to quiver and I kissed her gently, silencing her cries. Her hands slowly slid up my arms and then her fingers tangle themselves in my hair. I knew she was using all her strength to hold me there as she leaned more into the kiss. I pushed her back against the pillows, moving with her, slowly sliding my hand up her leg. She froze for a moment and then opened herself up to me. The scent of her arousal flooded the air around me and I pulled away, swallowing back the venom that was flooding my mouth. The moonlight hit her face in such a way in that moment that she literally glowed.

I lost myself in her beauty. Grabbing her leg I pulled her underneath me. She moaned and reached her arms around my back ripping my shirt up. I tore her offs and then hissed when the overheated skin of her breast touched my skin. She squirmed underneath me, bringing her hot center closer to the erection straining behind my pants. I pushed against her, what I thought was gently, but she whimpered once causing me to pull back. With my lips attached to her, I opened my eyes and looked at her. I wanted her badly but I knew I wasn't ready, it would be too easy for me to lose control. My mind sped through a million different scenarios when Alice's thoughts caught my attention.

"_I don't really think that's a good idea. May I suggest you trying this…" _

Bella's teasing words from the day before played out in her head and I felt myself growing even harder at the prospect. Bringing my lips to Bella's neck I gently sucked the skin of her collar bone and the slid my hand down to hers. She moaned, pressing her body against me more and I moved away a little, leaning at her side. Her eyes fluttered open and she sat up on her elbows looking me over. Her chest was heaving and it was hard not to focus on her beautiful breast bouncing slowly in front of me.

"Not time yet?" she asked me, breathing hard. I brought my lips to her chest, running my tongue around one of her pert nipples and watched with glee as her eyes rolled back in her head. Still holding her hand I pulled it to her own chest and pushed her back so that she would lie back against the pillows again. I covered her breast with her hand and she squeezed her nipple between her thumb and pointer finger while I lavished the other one with my tongue.

"Not yet my love…but we could do something else…if that's okay with you." I whispered in her ear. Her body shuddered beside me and I covered her hand with mine again, this time dragging it down her stomach. She looked up at me with recognition in her eyes and her face and chest immediately flushed red. I lurched forward, feeling my fangs start to protrude and moved quickly to her feet. Bella froze, sensing that I needed a moment to regain my composure and sat with her knees pressed together as if that would help.

Slowly I ran my legs up her calves and hooked my hands behind her knees. She oh so very slowly spread her legs open, and I waited stone still as her arousal washed over me.

"I miss that smell Bella. Its my second favorite scent in the world." She flushed red again and looked up into my eyes. Her lids were heavy with desire and her lips were slightly more plump contradicting the embarrassed blush she was wearing.

"Edward…you want me to…pleasure myself in front of you?" she asked in a hush tone.  
"Only if you want to Bella. Only if your comfortable…I would love to see." I answered her back holding my hands at the top of her knees. I waited, deep inside I was praying she would consent, and then she nodded, slowly lifting her hips. I slid my hands down her thighs and hooked my thumbs into the side of the tiny lace panties she was wearing. I slid them down slowly, taking in her scent and then sat back on my heels and watched as Bella first squeezed her breasts and then slid both hands over them then down her stomach.

She moved her foot towards my belt buckle and flicked it with her toe. I removed my belt and then she ran her foot over my pants so I took those off too.

"I think…that I would like to watch you as well Edward. If you can…" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Her voice came out smooth and seductive and I kissed her knee before slowly sliding back against the footboard. She sat up, looking at me from between her legs as I pulled my boxers down and laughed when I flung them at her. She settled herself, licking her lips and eyeing my painful erection hungrily.

"What would you like me to do Edward?" she asked still staring at my cock.  
I couldn't answer her. I swallowed hard eyeing her sex with my own hungry expression. I could see that she was dripping wet, and knew that I would easily slide into her but I'd probably kill her right now if I did. Her hands slid further down her body, to the backs of her thigh and she pulled her legs back further, exposing more of herself to me.

I growled audibly and literally watched as a surge of her juices poured out of her.  
"You liked that sound Bella?" I croaked out. She sighed out a yes as her fingertips fluttered against her swollen clit. I wrapped my hand around the base of my cock and started pumping in rhythm with Bella's ministrations. Her breathing was coming out in pants as she sped up and I sped up with her breathing heavily myself.

She used one hand to squeeze her breast and cried out when two of her fingers plunged into her entrance. With one hand around myself, I gripped the edge of the footboard in a feeble attempt to keep myself from launching onto her. She fingered herself roughly, bucking into her hand and moaning. With every sound that hit my ears I was getting closer and closer to my edge, watching her was the most mind numbingly erotic thing I had ever seen and I thought I had seen it all.

She shifted, tensing her body as she rubbed circles into her clit and then as if on cue she arched onto her hand. I peered closely and saw that she was fluttering her fingers against her sweet spot inside of her body. I pumped my own hand harder and faster feeling like I was about to fall into oblivion. She squirmed arching more on her hand and then raised her eyes from my lap to my eyes.

"Help me Edward." She whispered and like a bolt of lightening I lurched towards her. She pulled hand from her body and reached out for my cock. As soon as she touched me, electricity shot through my body and I crashed my lips down onto hers. Our tongues wrestled hungrily..violently inside her mouth. With her free hand she grabbed a hold of my wrist and pulled it towards her drenched center.

"Please…touch me…Edward…" she whimpered into my mouth and I could deny her no longer. I slid my fingers along her slit and she shook violently beneath me. Slowly, tentatively I pushed to fingers into her and pumped them slowly one time before she bucked her hips, slamming herself onto my hand.

"Harder…please…faster…you…wont…hurt…me…please…I'm..so…close…" She cried out through labored breaths and again I obliged her. She pressed her lips to mine again and my senses went completely out of whack. The mix between her warm soft lips on my face and my hand, and her hand that she began furiously jerking on my sent me teetering on the edge of insanity. With one last thrust of my hand her walls came crashing down, crushing my fingers inside of her and she screamed out my name.

The sight of my Bella in the throws of ecstasy catapulted me into my own release and bucked against her, roaring out some obscenity before flopping against the bed beside her. Both of our chests heaved and Bella turned to my side snuggling against my arm. She placed a long wet kiss on my shoulder before reaching over and stroking my chest.

"I love you Edward."

"I love you too Bella."

Before I could count to ten her breathing evened out and she drifted off to sleep. I imagined the days events had taken a toll on her and let her sleep peacefully until Alice insisted that I take her home. She dressed groggily and I cradled her in my arms as I ran her home. Bella's truck was parked down the street and I was semi-grateful the mutt has sense enough to bring it back to her. She went up stairs; ignoring Charlie attempts to talk to her and crawled into bed as soon as she got in her room.

"Next thing you know, my fathers gonna reveal that he's really the tooth fairy or something." She chuckled out.

"I wouldn't be surprised…considering you're an angel." She gave me one those are you serious looks and the rolled over on her side.

"Do you think things will ever settle down for us? I mean here you've been back not even a week and now we have this to deal with."

"I'm sorry. You probably wouldn't have ever found out if I didn't come back. Better yet if I hadn't of left in the first place." She turned away from me and exhaled loudly as if she'd been punched in the chest.

"Bella, love what's wrong?" I asked her suddenly worried that I had hurt her in some way.

"It..well…I don't like to think about you leaving. I don't like to think about you not being her with me." She turned into my arms and I held her, apologizing over and over again.

"I know you're sorry Edward. I know you never meant to do everything you put me through…its okay…I forgive you. Just know that when you see me cringe sometimes…I'm trying to rid the poison from my mind."

I kissed her forehead pulling closer to me and her warm breath danced across the skin on my neck. I could tell she was no longer sleepy so we worked on her homework and just talked until her eyes started to droop again.

"What happens now?" she asked as we were crawling back into her bed.

"What happens with what?"

"With you guys and the wolves. I wouldn't be surprised if Sam tries to start something."

"He can't Bella. We've done nothing to provoke him. And if he does anything…or even attempts to do anything to you…well…you already know that you're a part of my family…we'll have to deal with it."

"Edward…I don't want you to have to fight. Even though I'm pissed off at Jake right now…I still care about him. He may hate me right now but the feeling isn't mutual. I don't want him to get hurt."

"I wouldn't worry about it too much Bella. Above all things know that I will always protect you…and that also means protecting your heart. I won't hurt Jacob unless I have to so let's hope that he doesn't give me reason to. Let's just put all that behind us and live our lives."

I wasn't sure if she heard that last part because somewhere between my word she had fallen back to sleep. I would have fallen into my form of sleep as well if it hadn't of been for the unwelcome presence lurking outside her house. Jacob's thoughts filtered through to me as the padding of his wolf feet paced back and forth through the woods. He was here, trying to "protect" her and as much as I wanted to rip his head off, I couldn't hate him for it.

* * *

**A/N The lemons are back! The lemons are back! So....what did u think...we all knew what Jake's secret was...but now Bella knows to....Oh deary me...whats gonna happen....and what ever happened to "Red"? These are some things that we have to look forward too...as well as the lemons scenes I've been conjuring up in my twisted litte mind...**

**Enjoy my lovely fans. As always i thank you for your continued support!  
**


	43. The Night Will Go as Follows

**A/n So i guess you guys really dint like the last chapter, huh?I thought it was pretty good but to each his own...anyway here is the next installment, I hope you enjoy this one a little more. It has a lot of Edward sexiness and what not. **

**Read, enjoy, and be merry!**

**

* * *

****The Night Will Go as Follows**

**BPoV**

I hadn't expected things to go so smoothly following Jacobs revelation but they did. Weeks went by and I didn't here a word from him, not that I really tried. Admittedly I was too wrapped up in Edward's and my relationship to focus on much of anything else aside from my schoolwork which he insisted that I not neglect. If something was wrong, then for the first time I was completely oblivious to it.

Being certain one of my teachers would run to Charlie and tell him if they saw me with Edward we kept a safe distance from each other in school so that I didn't have to hear his mouth, but the sneaking around to steal kisses only added to the excitement. He would sit across the class from me; giving me sexy looks and mouthing random naughty things that he wanted to do with me. Everyday I would sit and squirm around in my seat completely turned on, just waiting for the bell to ring so we could sneak out to his car and play "guess which finger this is", which happened to be Edward's new favorite game.

The only class he refused to sit away from me in was English. While sitting in class one day I noticed that he was oddly antsy and kept fidgeting around in his seat.

"What's wrong with you?" I whispered to him placing my hand on his thigh. He stiffened momentarily and then glanced down at me with a devilish look on his face.  
"Nothings _wrong_ Bella. It's your skirt. Every time you move…I can smell you. I want it." I gasped, freezing as he placed his hand on my knee and slowly started to slide it upwards. I moaned softly at the feeling of his icy fingertips dancing up my inner thigh but grabbed his hand once the realization that we were in fact sitting in class hit me.

"Edward, don't! I whispered to him. He chuckled softly under his breath and I watched him slowly raise his hand and knock my pen off the table. In the blink of an eye he slipped out of his seat down to the floor and pulled my left leg open. Starting at my ankle he ran his hand slowly and softly up my leg. As his hand moved higher and higher my breathing became more erratic and I gripped the edge of the table in attempts to keep myself from sliding off the chair. Edward's fingers came dangerously close to my now wet center, dancing along the edge of my panty-line against my thigh. I tensed even more, letting out a low sigh before he pressed his thumb firmly against my clit and rubbed it. I moaned louder, quickly covering my mouth when everyone turned around and looked at me.

"Ms. Swan? Is something wrong…uh…Mr. Cullen…what exactly are you doing on the floor?" asked both of us. Edward popped up from behind the table holding my pen in his hand with a shit-eating grin on his face.

"Bella dropped her pen. I was just getting it for her." Edward answered coolly, sliding back into his seat. He glanced up at her, from underneath his lashes and smiled, showing his set of perfect white teeth. If I wasn't so embarrassed I would have been upset that he was so blatantly trying to dazzle her.

"How..How very um gentlemanly of you Mr. Cullen." Mrs. Trotta stammered out and then her face turned as red as a tomato. I turned to see if Edward's thirst was at all affected by the sudden rush of blood but he just winked at me.

"Yes how very gentlemanly of you." I murmured snidely under my breath. Mrs. Trotta went back to teaching and for the rest of the period Edward spent stroking my hand underneath the table staring at me. It wasn't until after the final bell when Alice came bouncing up to me that I found out why.

"Emmett and Rose are coming in from London this weekend for a visit. We're meeting them in Seattle tonight."  
"Yeah…fat chance of that happening. You know Charlie only allows my contact with you at the bare minimum. I highly doubt he's going to let me run away to Seattle with you."

"Bella, do you doubt me? I'm highly offended," she scoffed and turned her nose away smiling. "Besides I didn't mean all of us. You and Edward won't be coming!" A sly smile crept onto her face and she winked at me.

"Okay, and this is exciting for me because...?" I asked her still confused.  
"Because that means you'll have the house to yourself…for tonight at least. Carlisle and Esme are coming back tomorrow. Tomorrow you and Edward will drive out to hang for the day then he's gonna take you back home."

"I know you're probably right…but I don't know how you're expecting me to be able to sneak out. I barely get away with what I do now."  
"Bella, have some faith in me…would you. Now trust me. If you do exactly as I say everything will work out to a tee. I've already seen it." She leaned over and pecked me quickly on the cheek and placed a folded piece of paper in my hands.

"Now I've gotta go. Have a great night." I watched her flit away from me and when I turned around there was a white box placed in my locker that wasn't there before Alice walked up. I turned around just as Jasper was walking past me laughing and waved goodbye.

I drove home as fast as my truck could take me anxious to read whatever Alice had given me and to see what was in the box. Charlie was there when I got home but his eyes were glued to the T.V. so I was able to sneak past him and up to my room. As soon as I got there I opened Alice's letter first.

_At 8 p.m. Charlie will get a phone call telling him to come to the station  
He'll be gone for until about 10. Be asleep on the couch when he gets home.  
He'll tell you to get in bed and pass out himself.  
Wait an hour. And then Edward will come get you.  
Bring what's in the box and the clothes Charlie saw you in  
This is important:  
You absolutely have to be in your bed by 7:00a.m.  
Charlie is gonna check on you first thing.  
__**7:00a.m. GOT IT!**_

I opened the box and gasped when I found a deep blue corset with tiny shorts and garters to match. The stockings were sheer black and underneath it was a piece of parchment paper with Edward's elegant handwriting that read: _I hope you don't find this offensive but I saw this and couldn't get the thought of you in it out of my head. I hope you wouldn't mind wearing it for me._

An uncontrollable blush spread across my face as I realized what exactly was going on here. The house being empty…Edward saying he wanted it….I could barely sit I was so excited at the anticipation of actually being able to make love to him again. What we managed to do simply wasn't enough for me. I needed to feel every inch of him all over me inside and out. I put everything back in the box and pushed it underneath my bed just as someone knocked on my door.

"Who...Who is it?" I choked out barely able to conceal my excitement.  
"It's Jacob, Bella. Are you decent? Can I come in?"

"Jacob? What are you doing here?" I said jerking the door open.

"I need a reason to visit my friend?" He asked rolling his eyes and pushing past me. As soon as he stepped into my room his face wrinkled up and he covered his nose.

"Bella it wreaks in here. It smells like something…dead." I looked nervously around my room for a moment before I realized he was laughing and what he was referring to.  
"That's not funny Jake."  
"You're right. I'm sorry. Anyway, the real reason why I came here is because we haven't spoken for a while and I guess you probably have some questions to ask me about…what happened that day. I want you to hear my side of the story, not just what the Cullens told you."

"Okay, but they pretty much covered everything that I should know about. I know the treaty rules, what more do I need to know?" Jake didn't answer me as he was too busy staring at my exposed legs.

"Um, Jacob…what more do I need to know?" I repeated a little louder.

"I'm hungry. You hungry?" he said to my legs. I cleared my throat and he raised his eyes to meet mine. "Let's grab some food and I'll tell you everything." I must have had a weary look on my face because Jacob put on a smile that could rival Emmett's "I didn't do it" smile.

"Come on Bells. We're still bff's right? Fang is going to go all psycho controller on you and keep you from your friends now is he?"

"No he's not. And don't call him Fang. His name is Edward." Jacob laughed grabbing my wallet and keys and walked out the door. "Unless you're following my lunch is on you."

I followed him into my truck grateful that there was no weirdness between us. I tried calling Edward a few times but kept getting his voice-mail. I would have been worried but he text me back that he had tried to make me dinner and it was an epic fail so he was driving up to Port Angeles to get me food from my favorite restaurant. I text back what I was doing but he never responded.

Jake and I went to a diner and caught up on everything. He even promised not to rat me out about secretly seeing Edward although I didn't dare tell him what my plans were for the night. After the diner he suggested watching a movie at his house, and because it was still early I didn't think anything of it. I still had hours before I had to be "asleep" on the couch. At Jake's house we watched _Shoot 'Em Up_ and then Jake went into the lengthy and boring history of how the wolf phenomena came to be.

"So yea, I came in to find my roommate getting a blow job from my girlfriend and I just kind of lost it. I started feeling all hot and shaking and crap and ran outside to cool off. I just started running and running and like ended up in the woods and then my phone rang. It was her all like I'm sorry, it was an accident, I wasn't expecting you, I love you and when she said that the phone like crushed in my hand and I exploded."

The mental image almost made me want to laugh as we sat down to dinner. We talked with Billy for a little while and because I was having such a good time I stupidly lost track of time. By the time I realized it was 9:30. I ran out of there like a bat out of hell getting home unfortunately after Charlie. He was rummaging through the fridge for something to eat. I handed him the Tupperware dish I made at Billy's and he non-verbally thanked me and stuck it in the microwave

"Had a good time with Jake?"

I nodded nervously, my eyes darting up towards the clock and back to him.

"Yea I had a great time. I'm pretty beat though. You know…Long week. I'm gonna head up to bed. You look pretty beat yourself."

"Yea I am. I've gotta be in at 8. I'm gonna head on up to bed too." I chatted with him for a few more minutes, forcing myself to yawn to induce his sleepiness. Finally I followed him up the stairs. He hit the bed and I hit the shower having just enough time to figure out how to put on Edward's outfit and pj's over it. I slipped into bed minutes before his beautiful face appeared in my window. He lifted it quietly and sped to my side.

"My lady." He said holding out his hand for me. I smiled wryly slipping my hand into his and climbed out of bed. He looked disappointingly over my teddy bear pajamas.

"I take it you didn't like the outfit. I can't say I'm not disappointed. I actually picked it out myself."  
"Liked it?" I asked him turning his hand toward me and placing it on my stomach. "I loved it," I ran his hand up my chest so he could feel the corset beneath my shirt. I watched his eyes visibly darken before he clasped his mouth to mine in an earnest kiss. After a few moments he pulled away smiling leaving me breathless as usual and wrapped his jacket around my shoulders.

"I hope you're hungry Bella. I know I am." He grabbed me in his arms and pulled me towards him pressing against me. I could feel his growing erection poking through the thin fabric of his lounge pants and felt my knees quake with anticipation. I grabbed him, squeezing his hardening cock in my hand and looked up at him from beneath my lashes.

"For this…I'm starving." He growled lowly before giving me that orgasmic half-smile he always does.  
"Bella, my love…you are…almost too much for me. Let's get the hell out of here already." He turned allowing me to slip onto his back and I turned my face into his neck. Before I could say go I felt the cold wind seeping through my pants legs and lifted my head to see the trees whirring past me.

Within minutes we were walking into the house. Edward had placed candles on just about every surface possible and had a fire going in the fire place.

"I thought I would make this more special than our first first time. You deserved way better than that and as I promised…I'm going to make up for all of my mistakes." Edward took my hand and led me into the dining room. There were candles placed on the large table and two silver platters at opposite ends.

"Edward, just because I'm eating doesn't mean you have to. I mean I'm not even really all that hungry."

"Bella, I'm not eating. Are you crazy? I'm drinking. You're eating." Edward pulled the seat out for me and I sat down, watching him walk to the other side of the table. He pulled the top of his platter off and motioned with it for me to remove mine. When I looked at his plate all I saw was a metal cup, on my plate was chicken parmesan and linguine.

"What's um…What's in the cup Edward?" I asked watching him swish it around. He took a sip from it and relaxed back into the seat.

"It's aged mountain lion Bella. Aged mountain lion."

I broke out in a fit of laughter almost choking on pasta noodles. "All this time we've been together and this is the first time we're actually sharing a meal." Edward looked at me, raising his eyebrow sipping from his cup.

"I thought you'd enjoy the sentiment, not laugh." He sounded a little hurt causing me to instantly feel guilty. I jumped from the chair and bounced towards him but he held his hand up stopping me half way.

"Not so fast Bella. It's taking all of my control to drink this and contain myself in front of you. So don't make any sudden movements." He motioned with his hand for me to move forward slowly and I could see that he was gripping the arm of the chair. He placed the platter top over the cup and pushed it away from him as I approached.

"I'm sorry Edward. I wasn't laughing at you. I just, you didn't have to go through all this you know. This is…nice. But come one, this isn't in the least bit funny to you, I'm sitting here eating chicken and you're sipping on a goblet full of blood." A smile stretched across his face and he pulled me into his lap kissing me on the lips.

"Okay, it is a little corny. Everyone laughed when Alice told them what I was gonna do." Edward reached for the platter and putting the cup in between us. In an ultimate test of control I took it from him and he parted his lips leaning his head back allowing me to pour the contents into his mouth. His hand gripped the arms rests of the chair and his eyes closed. He made a small guttural moan as he swallowed. I had never told anyone but seeing Edward drink was a little fantasy of mine. I felt a surge of wetness between my legs and clenched my legs together hoping he wouldn't notice.

I nearly jumped out of my skin when Edward's icy hand grabbed my thigh pulling my legs open. When I jumped the cup did too and a small trickle of blood slipped from his lips and onto his chin. In the candle light he looked like one of those gothic vampire pictures. Absolutely beautiful. My breathing hitched in my lungs and we stared into each others eyes for a long moment before I moved to put the cup behind me. He took the cup from me and I took his face tenderly in my hands and turned toward him.

"Bella, what are you doing?" he asked me cautiously as I lowered my face to his.  
"Shhh Edward. Trust me and don't move." I slowly pressed my lips to his chin before slowly licking the spilled blood away. It was colder than I had expected it to be and a little salty but not as horrible as I had imagined.

"Bella, that was like the sexiest thing you've ever done." Edward finally breathed out. Within in seconds the empty cup and the platter were clashing to the floor and Edward had propped me on the table in front of him. I looked around increduoulsly for a second before turning my eyes to him

"Right here on the dining room table Edward?"  
"What? It's not like anyone eats on it." He answered laughingly. "Okay…okay Bella." He said when I rolled my eyes pushing him away. Taking my hand he led me into the living room and over to the fireplace. Soft music played in the background and he pulled me to the floor with him.

He pressed his lips gently to mine running his hand over my side. "I love you ," I murmured into his lips. Sliding my hands along his waist I grabbed the hemline of his shirt and pulled it off. Leaning back he slowly removed my pants letting his eyes linger over my stocking covered legs. His fingers tips danced across the tops of my thigh-highs and for a moment he looked at me like a little boy in a candy store. He moved to his knees and pulled me up while I pulled off my shirt. He slowly took in my body with his eyes and in all honesty I had never felt more beautiful or more wanted in my life. I literally watched the front of his pants start to rise and couldn't help licking my lips. He must have noticed because he laughed and then adjusted himself.

"Bella did I ever tell you that you're the most beautiful and sexiest woman to ever walk this earth. I mean it's rare for someone to be beautiful _and_ sexy…you….you are just…I'm dumbfounded right now."

Edward placed his hands on the backs of my knees and brought them up slowly and then gripped my ass in his strong hands. I moaned, leaning into him and he pressed his lips to my stomach before standing up, lifting me with him. My legs instinctively wrapped around his waist and he lowered me so that he could press against me. I felt him shudder for a moment as I pressed my hips more into him and then he collapsed to the floor onto his back.

"Yea, I don't think we're gonna make it up the stairs. I have to have you like now!"

With that he flipped me over onto my stomach and I gasped loudly when he pushed me onto my knees so I was on all fours. For a moment I thought he was going to rip the shorts off and just plow into me, instead he unfastened the corset and let if fall to the floor. The heat from the fire washed over me and then Edward's icy hands covered my breast as he pulled me up. I moaned loudly, knees shaking as he sucked the skin on my neck and simultaneously massaged my breasts. He positioned himself behind me so that he could press his erection against me. I could hear him moaning into my neck as I rocked against him.

Slowly his hands slid from my breast, down my stomach to between my legs. He rubbed me in rhythm with my movements and I could feel an intense orgasm building. My hands found themselves tangled in his hair as I panted and moaned from his ministrations. I turned my face toward him and he latched his lips to mine kissing me furiously as his hand sped up.

"Oh God Edward….I'm…I'm so close." I whined into his mouth.  
"Not yet Bella," he breathed out For a second he moved back, giving me a moment to wind down. I was about to turn around when he reached out and placed his hands firmly on my hips.

"No stay facing that way." He made quick work of detaching the garter belts from my stockings and I stood up so that he could pull the shorts down.

"God Bella, you're so beautiful." I felt a blush creeping over me but then Edward did something he'd never done before. He bit me….right on my ass. I turned quickly just to make sure he wasn't losing control but from the sexy half smile he was wearing I knew he did it on purpose.

"I thought you liked getting bit?" His voice came out like strawberry butter and I attacked him, launching my body onto him. Gripping fistfuls of his hair I pulled his head back and latched my lips onto his and we kissed in a frenzy, his smooth marble lips moved over mine hungrily as his hands held me by the backs of my thighs under my ass. I moaned in frustration when he pulled away and was about to protest but the wind was knocked out of me when he spun me around. The room seemed to fall around me as I felt him lay back and pull me with him so that my sex was hovering inches above his face.

I cried out in ecstasy as his tongue darted out against me and he began taking long languid licks. I could hear him moaning satisfactorily and almost lost it, leaning forward when he stuck his tongue inside of me.

"Fucking hell Edward!" I cried and couldn't keep from pushing back into his face. In a moment of clarity I realized what position we were in and quickly released him from the constraints of his pants. I wasted no time and took him entirely into my mouth. He hissed banging his head against the floor as I bobbed my head on his lap. I could feel his grip tightening on my thighs as Edwards waist twisted off the floor forcing himself further down my throat.

"Fuck Bella, stop…that's too much…stop" he whined between moans. I swung around so that I was now facing him while he was still in my mouth and raised my eyes to meet his. I took his hands placing them on the floor by his sides and began humming while he was still in my mouth. Edward's eyes rolled back in his head and his chest heaved as his fingers dug into the carpet.

"Oh fuck Bella…that's so good," he panted. He let me go for a few more seconds and then I was staring at ceiling and he was looming over me. He stared down into my eyes for a second calming down.  
"You're gonna be the death of both of us you know?" he whispered before pressing his lips to mine. His kiss was gentle and he slowly lowered himself onto me. Using my feet I pushed his pants all the way down and Edward pressed himself right at my entrance. My knees started to quake with anticipation and I pressed my hips down towards him but he pulled away.

"Just a second Bella, I want to say something to you first."  
"What is it Edward?" I whispered running my fingers through his hair. He pushed up on his hands, looking me over and then smiled wryly shaking his head.

"How in the hell did I get so lucky, hunh? There's no reason in the world that you should have taken me back. No reason why you should risk all you're risking to be with me."

"Is that what you wanted to say Edward, because it isn't very sexy."  
"No." he laughed out. "No that isn't what I wanted to say. What I wanted to say was that I am undeniably in love with you and that I hope all this is worth it to you. All that you're risking, I hope that I'm making it worth it. You're just so wonderful and deserve so much better than me…I wish I could do more…give you more..." I had to stop him there because I didn't want to start crying.

"Edward, I don't need anything but you. I would…I would walk through fire for you…you've always been worth it and always will be." Reaching up I pulled his face down and he kissed me again. This time his kiss was more passionate. His tongue searched every corner of my mouth and his every exhale dizzied me. By the time he pulled away I felt drunker than I had ever been in my life.

"Bella, I'm truly inspired… finding my soul there in your eyes… you have opened my heart and lifted me inside by showing me yourself undisguised. You've showed me things that I never thought I would ever feel. I'm unconditionally and irrevocably in love with you." With that he slowly pushed himself inside of me stifling my cry with his lips. My body stretched to fit him and I felt whole again. As he slowly rocked his hips into me I clutched him to me unwilling to ever let him go. He went slowly at first giving me unnecessary time to adjust to him; our bodies were designed for each other. We fit together like interlocking puzzles pieces but still he went slow allowing me to feel his every movement.

"I've miss you…your body so much Bella…I love you so much." Edward velvetly whispered out between my panting. I could feel heat boiling rising from my toes and knew I was close to exploding when he pulled all the way out of me.

"Why?" I cried out still clutching his arms. My body was shaking and when I looked up at him he was wearing a devilish half smile on his face that almost made me cum just from looking at him.

"I seem to recall me saying I wanted you to scream my name. All I hear is you moaning…I want you to scream for me Bella." With that he impaled me again this time faster and harder and I cried out arching my back up off the floor.

"Christ Edward!" I panted out as he pulled halfway out before he slammed his hips back into me causing the air to hitch in my lungs. He began thrusting intently into me making my world spin; his name started unconsciously falling from my lips as my body bounced in his hands on the floor. Edward reached down running his hands firmly down my thighs and pulled my legs behind him, tilting my hips from the floor. This position added depth and with every thrust he went deeper into me. My body jerked wildly in his hands and he growled plunging himself into me over and over until I couldn't take it any more. I cried out his name as my body began quivering uncontrollably.

"That's not screaming Bella!" He said roughly and then his hand quickly moved between us. I felt a ball of tension forming in my stomach as my entire body felt like it was in a cold fire. He pinched my clit once and I fell apart, screaming out his name.

"Oh My God Edward….Edward….fucking EDWARD!" I cried out loudly as he rhythmically pinched and thrust into me. A few seconds later Edward's hand shot to the floor beside me and I could hear the wood splintering as his own orgasm ripped through his body. He started to collapse and quickly rolled over onto his back pulling me with him.

Neither of us spoke as we ran our fingers through each others hair and kissed intimately.

"That was amazing."I breathed out finally after what seemed like an eternity had passed. Pressing my lips to his chest I stroked his stomach. His chest rose and fell in synchrony with mine as I played the night over in my head. Tears started to well in my eyes as my mind replayed all his loving words.

"I'm surprised," he said coolly.  
"At?" I said leaning up so I could look him in the face.  
"You didn't fall asleep afterwards." He laughed pulling the length of my body against him. I ran my handsthrough his hair and pressed pulled me up by my butt pressing his lips to mine trapping me in another kiss.

"I love your lips Bella. I could kiss you tirelessly for hours." He molded his lips over mine kissing me earnestly massaging my lower back. I could feel him stiffening beneath me and he pressed my stomach in his growing erection giving a small growl.

"Whoa there babe! My recoup time isn't as fast as yours is, remember?"  
"Sorry love, I just can't get enough you…you know that." He kissed me again this time fingering my ribcage and I laughed into his mouth rolling off of him.

"Stop that, you….naughty vampire. You know I hate being tickled."  
"Not when its from the inside." Edward retorted. I gasped as my face flushed red and then we both started laughing. Edward got up to go retrieve a blanket for me and when he returned my phone was in his hand and he was staring at it like it had sprouted legs or something.

"20 missed calls Bella. They're all from Charlie. I didn't even hear it ringing." His eyes met mine and I jumped up snatching the phone from him.

"I forget to tell you something was wrong with my ringer…it well doesn't ring anymore unless its on vibrate…shit…what could he be calling me for?"

Just as I finished my sentence the light flashed on the phone and I flipped it open quickly.

"Hello Dad." I whispered into the phone.  
"Bella what the hell…where the hell…Where are you? Do you have any idea what time it is? Where in the hell are you?"

I looked up fretfully at Edward and he wrapped his arms around holding me protectively to him.

"I'm…I'm coming home right now Dad. I'll he there soon. I um…I had something to take care of…I.."  
"Shut it Isabella. You just get yourself home right this instant. Do you have any idea how worried I was…all that noise coming from your room and I run in there and you're gone! I thought you got kidnapped or something. Get Home Now!" Charlie slammed the phone down and I put the phone back into Edwards hand. He was staring at me through narrowed eyes.

"Noise in you room?"  
"I don't know Edward…lets' just go before Charlie gets even angrier."

I pulled my clothes back on as Edward dressed himself and dashed around the room blowing out the candles .I followed him down to the garage and jumped in the Volvo speeding back to my house. The whole ride there Edward held my hand reassuring me that everything would be okay but nothing could assuage my guilt. I felt like my running off with Jacob the way I did was the cause of all this and I felt even more guilty when I looked at Edward's phone and saw that he never he got my text. He didn't even know I was there.

When we got back to the house Charlie was standing on the porch in his bathrobe and slippers. Edward's expression went from consoling to defensive and he moved faster than he normally would have to help me out of the car. He placed himself between Charlie and me holding me against his back.

"I knew it. Get out of the way boy. Get your grimy hands off of my daughter!"

"Chief Swan sir, please, calm down. Why don't we move this into the house so we don't wake all the neighbors?" Charlie's face turned beet red and he balled his fists up. I could have sworn he was about to try and pummel Edward into the ground.

"You are not stepping one foot into my house. Now get your hands off my daughter before I break your scrawny little neck you coward!" He raised his fist at Edward and I lurched forward ready to throw myself between them but Edwards grip on me was too tight.

"Sir please, I understand that you're upset and you have every right to be. I had no right in taking Bella out of the house this late at night without your permission. You're more than welcome to slap me around if you want too but please, can we not do this outside. I'd hate to ruin yours and Bella's reputation with the public display."

From the tone in Edward's voice I could tell he was doing more than just trying to assuage Charlie's anger. His body was rigid and he was gripping me too tightly. I suddenly became nervous and gripped Edward's arm afraid that Sam was going to jump out from the bushes or something.  
"Dad please, I'm sorry. Edward's right. Can we do this inside?"

Edward didn't waste time waiting for an answer. He pulled me towards the house leaving Charlie with the only option to follow. As soon as he closed the door he turned and pulled me from Edward's grasp. Edward reached out for me but then retreated when Charlie stared him down.

"What in the hell were you thinking Bella? You almost gave me a heart attack. I told you to say away from him and you go running off with him like some whore in the night." Charlie seethed at me pointing at Edward. I looked to him and his expression was telling me to remain calm. I hadn't even realized that my entire face was red with anger. I pulled my arm away from Charlie and stepped back to Edward's side.

"Dad, I'm 18 now. You can't tell me who I can and can not date. I'm not a child anymore."  
"Bella don't test me right now. As long as you live underneath my roof you abide by my rules. My word is law in this house young lady. Now you march yourself up to your room and Cullen you get the hell out of my house. And I'm saying this to you…stay the hell away from my daughter!"

Edward stepped forward holding up his hands in surrender towards Charlie and again placed himself in between us.  
"Sir you have every reason to feel that way. I'm sure if I was in your shoes I would feel the same way but you don't understand. I love Bella, I mean…Im in love with Bella. That's why I forced my family to come back. I can't bear to be without her. We only snuck around because Bella was certain you wouldn't allow us to see each other." Edward lowered himself to his knees in front of Charlie and hung his head in defeat. "I remember what you said before I left…about me not running off with your daughter…and Sir I don't intend to do that to you…I respect you too much." I stepped behind him placing my hand on his shoulder and he reached up and grabbed it facing Charlie.

"Sir, I don't want to take Bella away from you…But I came back to be with her and as long as she loves I'm going to be here for her. I intend to marry her."

This I did not know and both my father and I stood stock still in shock. Charlie's eyes darted from Edwards face to mine and then back and forth a few time before he shook his head furiously.

"No… No…Hell no…Absolutely not!" Charlie grabbed my arm pulling me away from Edward to his side. He squeezed my arm time pulling me to face him.  
"Do you hear me Isabella Marie _Swan! _ Get upstairs right this minute."

My gaze went from Charlie's enraged face to Edward's beautiful, loving, and honest eyes and in a moments time I made one of the biggest decisions of my life.

"Dad, let go of my arm. You're hurting me." I said through clenched teeth. He immediately let go looking regretful. Edward jumped to his feet to come to my side but I held my hand out for him to stop.

"I'll go up to my room Dad. I'll go up to my room right now…but because I know you….and because I know you're stubborn and you'll never change your mind about this…I'll go upstairs to my room to pack my things. Dad…you can't keep us apart. It's like trying to control the pull of one magnet to another. You can't But I know you'll try…and we'll fight…and we'll hate each other and I don't want that."

Edward stood statue still staring at me with his mouth hanging open. Charlie was red in the face his body slightly trembling before his hand shot out to smack me. Edward pulled me back just before his hand made contact.

"Fine Bella. Get your stuff and get out of my sight. Because I know you, I know your mind is already made up." He turned up his nose and stalked away from me as tears welled in my eyes. My own body began to shake and Edward pulled me into his arms but I pushed him away.

"Please go and wait for me in the car. I'll move as fast as I can."  
"Bella…"Edward started but I held up my hand silencing him.  
"Edward please. Just…go wait in the car." Edward moved slowly away from me and stopped in the doorway looking over his shoulder.  
"Hurry. Please."

I contained myself enough to throw clothes into a bag figuring I really didn't have to take much right at that second. Last minute I stuffed a picture of my dad and me into my bag and ran down the stairs. I even held it together enough to force Charlie to hug me. I kissed him on the cheek promising that'd we'd talk once we both cooled off. I held it together the whole ride home and thankfully Edward didn't try to get me to talk, he just played soft music and kissed my hand every time I started to cry. As soon as we got inside I cracked. Tears rolled down my cheek and I fell into a fit of sobs. Edward cradled me in his arms and carried me to bed letting me soak his shirt with my tears. I cried myself to sleep in his arms but as bad as things had gone I couldn't think of any place I would have rather of been. Something in my gut told me that I had made the right decision.

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**A/N In effort to get to then end chapter I'm going to squeeze as much into each chapter as possible, lemons and everything included. There will be a few more fluff chapters stuffed in there so i don't continuously bore everyone so i hope you enjoy.**

**BTW Everyone go see "The Book of Eli". It was an amazing movie.**

**And please review....at this point I don't even know if I should bother to finish it.  
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	44. Trouble is a Friend

**A/N Again I just want to say thanks to everyone who read and particular thanks to those who re-viewed and** **let me know that they wanted me to continue. It means a lot to me and makes me want to work harder to bring you guys good chapters. I hope you guys enjoy this one, i tried to include some humor and some Edward and Bella fluff, as well as some of the meat of the story (---i kind of don't like the way that sounds but oh well lol)**

**Read and Enjoy!**

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Trouble is a Friend**

**EPoV**

"I'm just saying that if I were you, I wouldn't tell her right now. She's feeling anxious enough. Trust me…I would know."

Jasper and I were driving back from the mountains after an overnight hunting trip. That night, after Bella and Charlie's argument, I wasn't able to go back and investigate the weird scent that surrounded their house. Bella had spent the night crying in my arms and it rained to boot.

"Yea, but I always told her that I wouldn't hide things from her. That I wouldn't keep secrets and here I am keeping a secret that could possibly endanger her life."

"True, but you don't really have anything to tell her. Alice is watching her like a hawk _preventing me from getting laid_ and no scent out of the ordinary has been anywhere else that she goes." _I think you're just being paranoid._

"I'm not being paranoid. I'm being…cautious." Jasper chuckled holding up his hands in mock defense.

"Worry when it's time to worry Edward. Right now Bella is feeling awful about fighting with her parents and guilty for staying with us. She thinks she's being a burden."

"And you know all this how?"

"Girls talk, Edward. Bella confides things in Alice that she knows will upset you when you're not around so you won't hear it."

Jasper shot me a sideways glance and then reached over and turned the music up feeling that I didn't want to talk anymore. It had taken me two weeks of insistent nagging to convince Bella to stay at my house instead of trying to get her own place. I even had to employ Esme to convince her she'd be worried sick if Bella were on her own all the time. I thought she was feeling better about staying with me but I guess I was wrong.

"I don't know why she's feeling that way about being at the house. It's silly really."

"Let me let you in on a little secret about girls Edward…they are all silly. They get upset over the dumbest things sometimes. For instance, once before we came to live with you guys, I bought Alice this dress we saw in window. I mean, she even said that it was cute…so I thought she must like it I'll get it for her. I buy the damn thing, give it to her, and she like looks like she's gonna cry. I asked her what was wrong and she balls the damn thing up, throws it at me and says I got it in the wrong color. I should know that she doesn't look good in yellow and that when she says something is cute that doesn't mean she likes it for herself, just that she thinks it's cute."

"Well at least Alice lets you buy her things. Bella gets all testy if I offer to buy her a sandwich when her stomachs growling."

"See I told you. Silly." Jasper and I shared a laugh and a few more stories of the silly things our respective mates get upset over before the sign for Forks came into view.

"So seriously, what do you think is going to make her feel more comfortable about living with us?" Jasper turned to me with an incredulous look on his face and his thoughts answered me before he could speak.

"Out of the question. I'm not changing her."

"Then she's never going to feel comfortable living with us. I still don't understand why you won't but right now I'm full of bear juice and feeling like I might want to go have relations with my wife for a few hours…so try and keep yours and Bella's moodiness at a minimum. I'd like to enjoy my night."

Jasper parked in the garage and walked at human pace up the stairs to Alice who was waiting in the doorway in a red silk robe with a coy smile on her face.  
"Evening ma'am," he said ducking his head like a southern gentleman and taking her hand to place a kiss on it. She giggled and tipped his chin up to look in his eyes. "Evening sir." The smile spread further on her face as Jasper hands snaked around her waist. They kissed and Jasper's thoughts conveyed that she wasn't wearing anything underneath her robe. Her thoughts conveyed that he was at the moment extremely aware of that fact.

"Hey Edward!" she called over his shoulder and he lifted her up onto his waist. They disappeared from the doorway and as I pulled the camping gear from the trunk, the soft padding of Bella's feet on the stairs caught my attention as did her fast beating heart. I dropped the gear and rushed up the stairs to meet her, catching her in my arms as we bumped into each other just as I turned in from the doorway.

"Hey!" she said looking up at me surprised.  
"Hey yourself. What's the matter?"  
"Nothing…why do you ask?  
"You're hearts racing, Love." I placed my hand over heart. It was beating harder now and she arched a little into my hand. "You're not sick are you? It's pounding." Bella wrapped both her hands around my wrist and then looked up at me from underneath her lashes. A small blush flushed onto her cheeks and she bit into her bottom lip.

"No Edward. I'm not sick. I just missed you." She said softly before reaching up on her toes to kiss me.

Her warm lips pressed to mine softly and when she exhaled her warm breath washed over my face. I growled softly into her mouth, my free hand snaking itself in her hair so I could pull her head back kiss her more deeply. I felt her smile as she dropped her hands hooking them in to the belt loops on my jeans. This allowed me to pull her further into me and though a fire raged in the back of my throat, the pull of her body had more of my attention. I kissed her arduously until I sensed that she had stopped breathing and reluctantly pulled my lips away. Bella's chest heaved as my lips moved to her neck and her head fell back allowing me better access.

"I missed you too, love," I breathed into the warm skin of her neck.  
"Oh yeah? How much?"she asked me between her barely there breaths,  
"A lot" She giggled bringing one of her legs up and I grabbed it and the other one hitching them around me waist. Bella rested her chin in my shoulder as I walked up the stairs and into our bathroom. I could see that she and Alice had spent our time apart shopping as everything in the bathroom was different.

"Did you enjoy your shopping trip?" I asked propping her on the counter and turned on the shower. I needed to wash all the dirt from my hair since Jasper and I had had a particularly rowdy hunting trip, complete with racing, bear wrestling and then subsequent brother wrestling. The only thing missing was Emmett. As Bella recounted her shopping trip with Alice I dropped my pants without thinking. Bella's heart rate soared and she choked on her words. I turned quickly to make sure she was okay and was greeted by her bright red cheeks before I realized why she was reacting that way. Then I laughed.

"I guess what they say about living with you're boyfriend is right." she muttered, her eyes glued to my package.  
"Oh yea, and what's that?" I asked leaning against the shower door to take off my socks.  
"They say that you get so comfortable around each other that nothing embarrasses you anymore. Good thing I don't have to watch you use the bathroom."  
"I could always watch you," I said poking my head out the shower door. We both smiled and then I made quick work of bathing. I had spent enough time away from her.

Bella was still sitting on the sink when I stepped out the shower, her face still flushed red as she watched me wrap a towel around my waist. I walked over pecking her on the lips and then proceed to run my fingers through my hair. We talked about my hunting trip and then I let Bella run her blow-dryer over my hair "so I wouldn't get the bed all wet". I stood in front of her between her knees and as she worked on my hair my gazed rested on her softly bouncing breasts. My desire for her was starting to rise, as was I, and I looked up into her eyes and pulled the blow dryer from her hands. She seemed to know what I was after and leaned forward allowing me to press my lips to hers. I kissed her deeply and she moved forward wrapping herself around me. We stayed there like that for a few moments, intimately kissing, me rubbing her thighs and her rubbing small circles on my back. As much as I loved actual sex with Bella, it was the little moment like these that looked forward to the most.

"Hmmm Bella, I don't think I'll ever get over how good your warmth feels." I said pulling away from her, her kiss had started to weaken and I knew that she starting to get dizzy.  
"I love you so much Edward."  
"I love you too Isabella."I let my kiss travel down to her throat as my hands tangled themselves in her hair. Bella leaned her head back exposing more of her neck to me and I ran my nose along her collar bone inhaling her scent. Pressing myself into her more I kissed her softly a few time before pulling away. My thirst started lashing at me and I didn't feel quite ready to take it any further.

"God…Edward…you can be such a tease you know that," she panted out when I let her go.

"I'm no more a tease than you are when you….well when you do just about anything." No need to let her know I still had difficulty being with her. Bella hopped down off the counter and walked from the bathroom wiggling her hips suggestively. I dressed quickly in a pair of pajama pants and a white t-shirt and went out to our bedroom. She had stretched herself on her stomach in the middle of the bed, the yoga pants she was wearing pulled tightly over her ass and it was all I could do not to go and bite her butt. Instead I crawled on the bed and lay on my side beside her. As I was used to seeing, she had her nose buried in a book, already half way through it. I watched for a few moments enjoying the way she looked against the setting sun in the background. Her nose would scrunch when she smiled at something funny and all I could think about was how happy I was to be here.

"What are you reading Love?" I finally asked her as I twirled a piece of hair around my finger.  
"East of Eden," she replied lifting her gaze to my face. I had a soft intake of breath as I stared into her deep chocolate eyes and saw that look of serenity they displayed. I moved closer to her, her eyes watching my warily, and pressed my face into the crook of her neck. She leaned into me slightly, letting out a small sigh as I once again inhaled her violently delicious scent and reached over her grabbing my book that lay on the night table beside her. She giggled when I kissed her neck and then rolled onto my back with the book in my hand. I open my arm to her and she rolled over resting against me and we settled into a comfortable silence reading while Morrissey played in the background.

I absentmindedly flitted my fingers across her shoulder and down her arm all the while letting her sent fill me. I felt Bella shift slightly and a wave of her arousal swept up towards me. I smiled gazing down at her letting my fingers sweep across her breast and she froze before craning her neck to look at me.

"You know, that's very distracting Edward. I'm just getting to a really good part."  
"Look who's talking? How can I focus when you sit there smelling as tempt you do?" Bella blushed, her sweet cheeks turning a tantalizing shade of red. I dropped my book slowly rolling to rest between her knees. Bella closed her eyes gasping slightly as I pushed my now evident erection onto her. I leaned in kissing her softly and she pulled my bottom lip between her sucking on it. The sensation of her warm lips over mine never ceased to send shivers down my spine. I hooked my thumbs into the waist of her yoga pants gripping her firm ass behind her.

"May I?"  
"May you what?" she raised her eyebrow at me giving me a half smile almost as deadly as my own.  
"May I take these off and make sweet sweet love to you?"  
A smile stretched across her face and she nodded lifting her hips so I could pull her pants off and then I tore my pants off as well. I didn't really like them anyway.

Bella ran her hands up my back clutching me to her as our mouths explored each others. After a few minutes she was fidgeting beneath me trying to get in that right spot, foreplay thankfully wasn't going to be a necessity for her this time. Not that I didn't enjoy it, my need to feel her was to overwhelming in that moment. Bella opened herself up to me and I closed my eyes trying to focus as the urge to ravish was her overwhelming. Just as I placed myself at her entrance I heard my name being screamed mentally. My eyes popped open and I stared at Bella's face for a split second thinking that it was her but then I realized it was Alice's voice.

_Edward! Oh My God Edward!_

"What the hell?" I said looking over my shoulder at the door.  
"What's the matter?" Bella said grabbing my face and turning me back to her.  
"It's…Alice….she's in there with Jasper..."  
"So?"  
"She's …screaming my name in her head."  
Bella's face twisted up in confusion and she looked past my arm at the door.  
"Um ew…why?" Alice's thoughts came screaming at me from the hallways as she rushed towards my door.

_Damnitt! You two get dressed! I'm coming in! _

Growling I handed Bella her pants and then threw my robe on. "What is it Alice?"  
Alice walked in wearing a sheet wrapped around her followed by Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme who were also robe-clad. Carlisle was wearing a mean case of hand hair and even if I couldn't have read minds I would have known what they were up to.

_I think there's going to be trouble Edward…_were Alice's first thoughts as she reached over to smooth out Carlisle's hair. He swatted her hand away laughing.

"What kind of trouble, Alice?" I asked her impatiently.

"Tanya's dead."

No one moved. Not even Bella was breathing. We all looked at each other for a few minutes and then Bella crawled to the edge of the bed taking my hand.

Carlisle finally broke the silence. "Are you sure Alice? What exactly did you see?"

"Well it wasn't clear at first. Just flickers of her running for the past few days. I didn't think anything of it because she hasn't stayed in the same place since well…that night when she took Bella but over the past few days it looked different. Every time I saw her face she looked scared and angry. And then tonight I had a flash of her. She was in Italy…I thought she might be headed for Volterra. I was right. I can't say but I think she might have gone there for like safety or something but who ever was after her caught up with her. I just had a flash of them talking…and then she…disappeared. Poof…gone…There was no white light like I had when we thought Bella was dead. This time it's just pitch black…nothing."

Esme came up and grabbed Carlisle's arm as Jasper wrapped his arms around Alice's shoulders. Everyone's thoughts had an air of sympathy, even my own. She may have annoyed the hell out me and caused ridiculous amount of trouble but it's still sad when someone you know dies.

"Alice, could you see who…who did it?"Esme asked her in a whisper.

Alice shook her head and leaned back onto Jasper. "I couldn't see their face but I know it was a female. Kind of small like me and with bright red hair."

Bella's grasped tightened on my hand and she gasped. I turned to her questioningly and she stammered out red hair.

"Yes Bella. Like red red...Why?"

"It's just that… well…while you guys were gone… there was…There was a vampire that came around and Jacob told me that she had bright red hair. He said they chased her around for a while and that they eventually got her out of town because they couldn't catch her but one night…there was all this howling going on in the woods outside my house….I didn't even think of it until now but I went outside to check it out and I could have sworn I saw like a flash of red go by."

"Bella did they say around where they were chasing her? Was it just around your place or what?" I asked her suddenly panicked.

"No Edward, I never…I didn't ask. Maybe she was just following Tanya's scent…maybe she came around looking for her."

Jasper's thoughts said the same thing._ If you're thinking what I think you're thinking this could all be over. Maybe who ever it was just re-covering their tracks or something. She must have really pissed them off._

"Alice are you sure…really sure that Tanya is actually dead…or can you just not see her."

Alice's thoughts were a little bitter at Esme's questioning but she moved to my couch and sat down focusing her thoughts on Tanya. I could see it in her head as well. There was nothing. It was like staring into a black hole. A feeling of emptiness and desperation came over me and I knew it like I knew my own name.

"She's dead," we said in unison.

"Oh that's just terrible. Carlisle do you think we should wait or call Carmen and Eleazar now and let them know?"

"I think we should let them know. Maybe they'll have some information on who could have done this and what they could have come here for." Esme nodded and then flitted over to Alice.  
"I didn't mean to doubt you sweetie. I just didn't want to alarm them for no reason. You know that I trust you with my own life." She wrapped her arms around Alice's shoulders kissing the top of her head.

_Edward maybe now would be a good time to tell Bella about that night. Maybe she could talk to Jacob and see if they know anything,_Carlisle thought at me. I nodded and he and Esme walked out of my room shutting the door behind him. A few moments later I heard Esme's soft voice murmuring on the phone to Carmen who didn't seem at all surprised but no less sad. I sat back on the bed and Bella curled herself into my lap as Alice and Jasper settled onto the couch.

"So what now? What do you think we should do?" Jasper asked as he unconsciously rubbed Alice's arms. I reached up pinching the bridge of my nose as I often did when I was trying to clear my head and focus my thoughts. Today it wasn't working.

"I…Carlisle wants…Damnitt!"Bella turned to face me in my lap and pressed her chest to mine. I could feel her heart beating against me and within moments I relaxed. She pulled back looking into my eyes.

"Are you okay Edward?"  
"I'm fine Bella. It's just that…well that night when you argued with your father, there was something not right…aside from the crash in your room."  
"I knew it." She replied softly. Bella rest her head on my shoulder and reached up to coil her fingers in my hair. "What was it?"

"There was an unfamiliar scent all around your house. I didn't hear anything out of the ordinary but I didn't want to take any chances. I mean, if I can't hear your thoughts so who's to say there isn't someone else out there that's mute to me." Bella stiffened in my arms and I wrapped my arms tighter around her.  
"I didn't say anything to you before because I knew you were already stressed and I didn't want to add to it. Please don't worry Bella. Nothing will happen to you. I swear it."

Bella turned to look over her shoulder at Alice and Jasper. The mood in the room immediately turned to anxious and I could tell from Alice's thoughts that it was all coming from her. She had a quick flash of Bella and I arguing loudly and tears running down Bella's face.

"Could you guys excuse us for a moment?" Bella said flatly, I clutched her closer to me staring into Alice's eyes asking for help.

"Um…Bella…let's not be rash now. There's no need to um…you know talk about that now."

"Alice, while I appreciate your concern…I think there is. Please don't take this the wrong way but I'd like to speak to Edward alone for a minute." Her voice was severe; I had never heard her speak to Alice that way. Jasper began to send out calming waves throughout the room and I felt Bella go lax in my arms.  
"Jasper please? I don't need that right now. Though if I need them later, I'll come find you?" she said to him and more so asking on the last part.

_Be nice Edward. Think before you speak, _Alice thought at me before they both left the room.

Bella slid off my lap and walked painfully slow to the door and locked it. She turned pressing her back against the door and looked at me with a well-constructed poker face.

"Edward. I'm scared."  
"Don't be Bella. Who ever that was, if they came here looking for something it was probably Tanya and well they found her apparently so let's not get ahead of ourselves."

"Okay, lets try this another way. Remember how you said I have no sense of self-preservation?"I nodded.  
"Well I do. And my sense of self-preservation tells me that I may be in some kind of danger for the rest of my life. Apparently with or without you in it." The thought of Bella being in danger sent anger surging through me and I had to rip my hands off the foot board to keep from crushing it.

"Bella, we don't know that you're in danger yet. Please don't start to worry until we know there is a reason to. Graduation is coming up and we still haven't picked a school to go to next year. I mean finding a new house and all that is going to take time. There are so many other things to worry about."

"Edward, for someone who is so smart you lack in the common sense department. The same night someone breaks into my room there is a strange scent surrounding my house. What if I had of been in there?"  
"I would have been there."I chuckled under my breath giving her a half smile in attempts to ease her but she kept herself contained against the wall not even so much as cracking a smile. She could be a brick house sometimes.

"Edward, think about this logically for a moment. If you changed me…" I held my hand up stopping her  
"Can we please not do this now? We have years…years… before you're not being changed is going to be a problem. Maybe then…we'll talk about it. But right now…you're just too young…there's too much I want you to be able to do."

"Edward what is it that you think I want to do that you can't?"

My thoughts flashed to a picture of Bella looking up at me adoringly with her fingers splayed out across her swollen belly. The images of her holding a baby lovingly against her chest and bouncing a little baby on her knee flashed next and for a few seconds I felt that empty useless feeling I always get when I think about all the things I **couldn't** give her. I had toyed with the idea of artificial insemination as an option for the future but didn't know how I was going to explain to our growing child why daddy never looks any older but mommy does…make-up maybe…It would take hours to put on old face everyday but hell I don't sleep so…

"Edward focus! If you changed me then I wouldn't be such a burden to you. You wouldn't always have to protect me. I'd be able to defend myself against vampire and human alike." My eyes flickered to hers which had softened as I wonder what human she would be afraid of. Mike Newton popped into my head and the fateful night that brought us closer together.

"Bella," I said softly reaching out for her. She walked over and took my hand. I pulled her into my arms rubbing her face with mine as she stood between my legs. "Number one you are not a burden to me or my family, so don't think that for a second. No one is going to touch a hair on your head ever again. I swear it to you. Please don't worry. My sole purpose in life is to protect you…keep you happy." Bella let out a small whine and then crawled up into my lap.

"Why won't you just cave Edward?"  
"Because I'm just as stubborn as you are." Bella chuckled under her breath crawling off me and underneath the blankets. I crawled to lie next to her and cuddled her in my arms. We lay there for a few minutes before the thought occurred to me that her guard dog might know something.

"Bella do you think you could do me a favor?"  
"Depends on what it is?"  
"I would like to speak to Jacob. I would like to see if he knows anything about who broke into your room that night or if his pack knows anything."Bella rolled over in my arms to face me and placed one of her hands on my waist pulling her lower half closer to me.  
"I could just ask him, Edward."  
"You could, but he could also lie to you. As he doesn't know that I can read his thoughts it would be better if I were there. I promise not to pick a fight with him."

Bella nodded and I confessed to her that I knew he often stalked outside her house at night to keep an eye on me. She seemed horrified at first but then mumbled something about that being just like him and she hoped he hadn't heard us doing "things" in her room or else she'd be mortified. I stifled back my laughter, replaying his thoughts of "how in the hell Charlie didn't wake up because Bella was so loud" and how he thought it was disgusting her letting me touch her that way. There were quite a few, "I wish it were me's" but that was only when his thoughts had annoyed me to the point that I did something particularly special to get Bella to scream. One of those nights Charlie actually did rush into her room with his shot gun. Thank God for the dark corners of her room because it was hilarious to watch. "Not so loud please," he said to her, thinking that she was masturbating. Her cheeks burned red for an hour and she wouldn't let me come near her for the rest of the night.

Bella and I watched a movies for the rest of the night as neither one of us was particularly in the mood to do anything else. Tanya's demise had apparently dampened the mood in the whole house. Esme spent hours on the phone with the Denali clan and Carlisle conversed with his non-Volturi friend in Volterra fishing for information. Japer and Alice were talking with Emmett and Rose and making travel arrangements from them to come home as they were out in the wilderness somewhere hunting. Before long morning came and Bella was stirring at my side with her stomach rumbling.

I kissed her cheek good morning sliding from the bed but she grabbed my arm. "I know where you're going. I'll make my own breakfast," she said smiling with her eyes still closed. I laid back down and she kissed my cheek and ran into the bathroom to shower and change. I stepped into the shower just as she was leaving the room and by the time I got downstairs she had already eaten and called Jacob to set up our meeting.

"He said he'll meet with you at the treaty line in the clearing and that you should know where that is. He also said he's bringing back up even though I assured him that you were coming in peace.  
"Hmmm…He cautious."I came up behind burying my face in her clean hair inhaling her heavenly scent. "When?"  
"He says tonight."  
"Okay, tonight it is. What time?"  
"Twilight."  
I laughed into her hair. "My favorite time of day. Okay that's fine."

The rest of the day sped by fast enough. While Alice, Bella and Esme worked on their final art projects for school, Esme had put us men to work cleaning all of the glass paneling inside and outside of the house. Even at vampire speed it took all day to get that no streak shine that Esme demands. We finished an hour before I had to leave and as I went for my keys Alice stopped me.

"Edward are you stupid or something?"  
"I'm sorry what?"  
She screamed for Carlisle to come downstairs like a banshee and he came hopping on one foot pulling on his pants. "What? What's wrong Alice?" he asked her frantically counting the bodies in the room. Esme came down a step behind him wrapped in their shower curtain. Everyone's eyes zeroed in on them and I swear if Esme could have she would have blushed. She stepped behind Carlisle on the stairs and shook her head dismissing our snickers.

"Alice?"  
"Oh yea…um Edward is trying to go meet the wolves _alone_." I narrowed my eyes at the little tattle-tale shrinking away from Carlisle's disappointed glare.

"Edward, really. I know you have more sense than that. Jasper you go with him. I know you'll be able to keep things under control but if there's trouble you make sure and call me." Jasper nodded and both Alice and Bella jumped up at the same time.

"We're going with you!" they chimed in unison.

"Ladies…this isn't a trip to the mall. Stay home and out of trouble please." Alice rolled her eyes at Jasper pulling on her boots. "Yeah right. Just go start the car." She grabbed my keys from me and tossed them into Jasper's hand. Bella was already walking past me.

"If I don't go you two will probably end up ripping each others heads off. Jacob can be…infuriating sometimes." I groaned in annoyance but her an Alice were already walking out the door.

_I don't have to tell you to be careful, do I Edward?_ Carlisle thought at me as I turned to leave. I shook my head no. "Good, then make sure you all come back in one piece please." Just before I walked out the door I turned back over my shoulder and laughed. "By the way Esme next time you come out wearing a shower curtain, make sure it isn't a clear one." She balled it up and threw it, just missing me before I dashed out the house.

We made it to the clearing with time to spare so Jasper and I huddled together sorting out an action plan just in case they attacked. The smell of wet musty dog carried on the wind and I could hear that there were two other wolves with Jacob. They stopped just behind the trees as Jacob phased back to human. The other two were astonished that he was coming to me in human form. They knew that Alice and Jasper were with me and proceeded to nudge at him with their noses trying to tell him to phase back. He jogged out from behind the trees and the two followed close at his heels. The stopped in front of us looming large and dangerously close to coming over the treaty line. Jasper attempted to keep a casual yet ready for anything stance on my right and Alice stood still holding her breath at my left.

_God the stink is so bad!_ She thought almost making me laugh. Bella squealed throwing her arms around Jacobs neck saying her hello's but all he did was hold her waist and stare into my eyes with a look of contempt on his face.

"You broke your father's heart moving in with the cadaver, you know that right Bella?"  
"Jacob, don't be a jerk." She said pushing him and stepping back to my side.

"Okay, Cullen. Let's get this over with. What do you want?"  
" A distant associate of my family was killed last night."  
"Shame," he spat out sarcastically causing Jasper to snicker. His thoughts were of how if Jacob wasn't our mortal enemy he could actually like him. That he was his type of guy…snarky and straight to the point.

"Anyway, who ever did it was a vampire with red hair. Bella expressed to me that you had a run-in a while back with a red-haired vampire."  
"Yep." His thoughts flickered between images of his pack chasing "Red" as they named her through the woods and finally past Bella's house.  
"Okay well I don't know if you know that someone had broken into Bella's room a few weeks ago. The night that she moved out." His eyes bulged from his head for a few seconds and his eyes darted between the two of us.  
"Don't worry. She wasn't there. She was with me." I said trying to assure him that no danger had come to her. A slightly fuzzy thought came into his head and I came to recognize it as one of his pack members' thoughts. It was the same vampire.

"So she did come back!" I seethed and all eyes were on me for a moment.  
"Yea I guess but if you already knew then why are you asking me?" I noticed that he was doing his best to hold his breath and took a step back from him in consideration. My scent was burning his nose. He eyes narrowed his eyes at me for a moment and then looked at Bella.

"So you lied to me again, what else is new?"  
"Lied to you about what Jacob?"  
"You said you didn't know anything about Red and here she is sneaking into you room at night. Don't tell me you go both ways now."  
"Jacob!" she scoffed at him.

"Bella is just as in the dark about this one as we are. Who ever that is isn't part of our family, immediate or distant. If she were do you think we would be out here subjecting ourselves to your smell?," Alice chided. Her whimsical voice had kept the three of them from realizing they had just been insulted.

"Okay, let's get this straight," Jacob began. "Red comes into town…obviously looking for something, sneaks into Bella's house and leaves Charlie alive but goes back and kills your friend." The four of us nodded. "So she was obviously after one of you or else she would have dispatched Charlie and whoever else she came across." Jacob's thoughts flickered through Sam telling him they didn't need him to run patrol for a few days after Red had come back and even went so far as in forbidding him to phase in his presence. He was starting to feel just as suspicious as I immediately was.

"Why would Sam do that?" I asked without thinking.  
"Why would Sam do…wait who said anything about Sam?" Jacob narrowed his eyes at me again and the two other wolves took a step in closer causing Jasper to take a step forward and send calming waves throughout the crowd.

In an obvious test of my abilities Jacobs thoughts starting to picture Bella naked in his bed, and despite Jasper's calming waves anger boiled in my gut. I clenched and unclenched my fists and Jacob proceeded to shake his head furiously.

"Bella! Why didn't you tell me!"  
"What? Tell you what Jacob?"  
"That this blood-sucking fucker could do things. This is what we were trying to ask you about and you just kept your mouth shut this whole time." He turned back to me, his face red with anger. "You're reading my mind aren't you blood-sucker?"

I couldn't help but to give him caustic yet nonchalant look as I shrugged my shoulders. "Maybe."  
He rolled his eyes yet I could see the slight tremor of his body. I looked to Jasper who began sending out more calming waves.

"Okay, so it's like this blood sucker. Red comes into town and we can tell she sniffing around for something in particular because she isn't exactly coming _into_ town. Sam chased her out to that spot that you guys off'd that other bloodsucker and comes back and says he talked to her. Like as a human he talked to her because he didn't want to attack if she were part of your family and start a war. She tells him she isn't here to feed, that she's just looking for something and that she wouldn't hurt anyone if we stayed out of her way. So he tells me, and what I thought was every one else but what I just found out today that it was just these two guys, that we aren't to go out for patrol until she leaves because she only trusts him."

"So Sam must have something to do with it."  
"To do with what?"  
"With the fact that whoever she is broke in to Bella's room."

"The hell he does!" Jacob started shaking harder and Bella reached out to grab his arm but I pulled her back.

"Listen Jacob," Bella said to him. "You know that Sam doesn't care for me. Isn't it possible that if Sam made a deal with her, that part of that deal was that she could have me?"  
"No, Bella…It isn't possible. Sam doesn't just go around sacrificing people. He probably only acted that way towards you because he knew you were hiding something…like the fact that they", he point at the three of us "have special abilities. And who said she was looking for you…maybe she was looking for him. I mean his rancid stench is all over your house."

"Jacob," she said putting her hands on her hip. "Number one, I told you to be nice! Number two, if "Red" was looking for Edward…or any of the Cullens for that matter why wouldn't she just go to their house?

Jacob mulled this over in his head for a moment and then started thinking about a brick wall assuming that that would keep me out.  
"That doesn't work. There's no use trying to keep my out. I can read your subconscious too." He growled and I automatically tensed stepping between him and Bella.

"Would you two calm down please?"She said stepping in front of me.

"Edward…Edward listen to me…" she grabbed my shirt and I covered her hand with mine so she knew she had my attention but didn't take my eyes off of Jacob. "We have some new information. Now let's go home and try and sort it out. Okay come on." Bella tugged at my shirt and whimpered lightly breaking my attention. There was a certain nervousness in her eyes so I stepped back and wrapped my arms around her kissing the top of her head.

_Fucking gross,_ Jacob thought.  
"Well thank you for your help. Goodbye Jacob Black."

"If you come after Sam you know we'll kill you all right?"he said bluntly as if he were asking me the time. Bella spun around on her heels, her heart rate soaring and she put all her weight into pushing Jacob.

"Cut it out Jacob! God, you can be such an asshole sometimes. Sam must be rubbing off on you!" she screamed in his face.  
"Bella, love its okay." I said pulling her back to me. "Jacob no one is going to come after Sam I assure you, that is unless he does have something to do with Red getting into Bella's room. If that be the case, I _will_ rip his head off and mail it to you." I took Bella's hand and turned my back to him.

"Hey Bella, you should see a shrink about your necrophilia problem. They my have meds for it." Bella's body tensed next to me and she turned back to face him.

"Not as many as they would give her for being a zoophile," I seethed back at him. That must have been the straw that broke the camels back because within seconds the three of us were crouched in defensive positions in front of three grunting wolves. Bella was scrambling for something behind me but I didn't dare look.

"Hey…Jacob!" her voice came up out stammeringly. "You want to play fetch?"

Through Jacobs mind I could see that she was nervously waving a big stick in the air trying to smile. Jacob eased back laughing in his throat. His eyes softened and I could see that Bella's smile had spread from ear to ear. Some how she knew he had calmed down and his thoughts were telling me to calm down, that he wasn't going to hurt her before he motioned with his giant smelly head for her to move forward. She did and he grabbed the stick from her and tossed it over his shoulder before he stuck out his slobbering tongue and covered her face in his saliva. Bella stepped back screaming and laughing at the same time, swatting at his nose.

_There, hope you enjoy my scent all over her face the next time you go to kiss her bloodsucker._

Bella scratched behind his ear and whispered to him to be nicer or else she'd dig in with the dog jokes before turning back to him.

"Ready to go?" she said smiling, taking my hand.

Jealousy burned in me as I drove home but I refused to let Bella know. We had more important things to worry about.

* * *

**A/N Thanks for reading, as usual I just ask that you review, even if you its just to say hi...**

**Everyone should go see "From Paris with Love" I watched it last night and it was one of the best movies I've seen all year. Just the right mix of action and comedy with enough love story in the mix!!! **

**Who's going to see "Valentines Day" when it comes out?  
**


	45. Please Please Let me get what I Want

**A/N So heres the next chapter. I apologize for wait for those of you who were waiting. My course load at university is killer and I've been under the weather as well.**

**I hope you all enjoy!**

**

* * *

****Please, Please, Let me Get What I want.**

**BPoV**

The rest of the night was quiet. Edward and Jasper were in Carlisle's study trying to piece together the information we got from Jacob leaving me to eat dinner alone. By 11:3o I was worn out and crawled into bed. No sooner than laying my head on the pillow I was fast asleep.I hadn't felt it when Edward slid into bed with me but I did feel him gently kissing me awake. He softly kissed my cheeks, lips, nose, forehead, and then finally my eyes.

Softly he whispered in my ear "Wake up Love. Its morning," and my eyes fluttered open only to be staring up into his smoldering amber eyes.

"Good morning," I somehow managed to breathe out. The intensity of his gaze had me unable to move. Edward's mouth came down gently to mine and for a moment I thought I was dreaming until I heard his low growling. He pulled away minutes later, allowing me to breath and let the dizziness fade and I realized it was still dark in the room.

"Edward what time is it?"

"4:50,"he said matter-of-factly...as if it wasn't insanely early in the morning.

"Not that I'm not enjoying your wake-up call and everything...but why so early?

He rolled off me, smiling his sexy half smile and motioned toward the open glass door. "I thought we would go lay by the creek. Watch the sunrise," he said sliding from the bed. He smiled sweetly as he held out his hand and I graciously gave him mine. So what if I lost a few hours of sleep.

"I'd love to." Edward handed me his oversized robe and blurred out of the room returning seconds later with a stack of blankets in his arms. He pulled me on his back, jumping to the ground and we flew through the trees. While I was caught my bearings he laid the blankets on the ground and then pulled me down next to him.

"You were tossing and turning all night. Is there something you want to talk about?"

My cheeks flushed red. What I might have said worried me more than my sleep dancing.

"Oh...I didn't notice."

"You don't remember your dreams at all?" He sat up looking at me and I turned my face away and lied.

"Nope."

There _was_ one dream in particular that felt like it recurred all night. In it a faceless red-haired vampire attacked me, I screamed bloody murder but no one came to save me because Edward was gone again and took his family with him.

Edward twisted a lock of my hair around his finger smiling before pushing it behind my ear. "Did you know that when you lie your nose gets longer?"

Unconsciously I covered my nose.

"You know Love, I may not be able to read your mind but watching you sleep is the next best thing. Why do you think I enjoy it so much?"

"Because you're a creepy vampire?" I said smiling.

"Okay you got me there," he smiled pulling me to sit up next to him and then wrapped his arms around my waist nuzzling his face in the crook of my neck.

"Silly lamb, how can you be afraid of me leaving you again? I can't live without you. Don't you know that by now?"Edward's normally velvet voice sounded strained and I turned to face him placing my hands on his chest. Tears welled in my eyes as I looked at him. I placed my hands on his face, pulling him in and our lips met with a burning passion, the kiss deepening by the millisecond as we fisted each others clothes. Edward was not only showing his love for me, but his physical need for me as well. He clutched me to his body, molding himself to me and his marble lips moved over mine. I crawled into his lap and wrapped my legs around his waist, trying to close the space between us. His scent dampened all but one of my senses, all I could do was feel him...his essence... his love and just like that I knew.

He wouldn't leave me. He needed me just as much as I needed him.

The tightness in my chest let me know that I needed air and we reluctantly pulled away staring into each other's eyes.

"I'm sorry for feeling any doubt, but you can understand why I would feel that way," I breathed out as I tried to reclaim my senses.

"I can. I just don't want there to be a reason for me to need to. I don't want you worrying about that on top of everything else. I meant what I said to Charlie. I want to marry you."

My mouth fell open as I realized what this sunrise date had to be about. My heart started pounding with anticipation and my hands felt clammy as I slowly slid off his lap. He smiled placing his hand over my left one and ran his thumb across my ring finger looking at me from underneath his lashes.

My heart pounded even faster and I felt like I couldn't breathe. Holy crap! He's going to propose!

"You..You do?"I choked out.

"Of course Bella." Edward brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it. I could feel my face flush red and I looked up at him expectantly but he just laid back down smirking at me with his hands behind his head. "You okay Love? You look like you just saw a ghost."

"No...just a teasing vampire."

"I'm sorry Love. I don't mean to tease you. You're just so cute when you get all flustered."

"Yea, yea, yea. Very funny Edward. You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Good thing my father's a doctor then."

I quickly reached underneath Edward's shirt pinching his nipple as hard as I could. I had found that if I did it hard enough, he'd actually squeal and sure enough he did, squirming to get away and laughing.

"Oh you're gonna get it now Swan!"

He pushed me down trapping underneath him. There was no getting out of my Edward cage...not that I would have wanted to anyways. He started tickling me and I laughed until my stomach hurt. "Okay, okay I'm sorry! I'll never do it again!"I cried.

"Your nose is growing again Love."

We both laughed staring into each other's eyes. Even after all this time his beauty still took my breath away and for a moment I just drank in his smile and beautiful eyes. The sun was starting to rise, shining right on us and his face began to sparkle like he was covered in hundreds of tiny perfect diamonds. I exhaled softly as he leaned back on his heels pulling the robe open. I wasn't wearing much underneath it, just a burgundy chemise that apparently shrank in the wash because my breasts were spilling out of the top of it. Edward slowly swept his hand over me, cupping my breast as it passed and then slowly down. My cheeks and chest flushed red as I clenched my thighs together, his hands felt so good on my skin after being wrapped in the warm robe. I moaned softly as Edward reached underneath the chemise and walked his fingertips up my thighs.

"You're so beautiful Bella." he whispered in my ear before pressing his lips to my skin right beneath it. I shuddered underneath him when I felt his fingers brush gently across my slit and then he re-positioned himself, bringing one of his knees between mine and pushed my legs open. I groaned, twisting the blankets in my fists and arched my back off the ground when I felt his fingers probing me. He slid his middle finger into me curling it over my spot and my hips twisted off the ground trying to move on his hand.

"Ungh Edward, you're killing me!"  
"Am I now?" he said coyly, raising his eyebrow at me. Slowly he slid his finger out and roughly replaced it with two. I cried out in pleasure but again he stilled his fingers, only allowing me to feel his delicious coldness cooling me from the inside out. He leaned over me, running his other hand up my side to my breast and ran his thumb over my nipple before latching his mouth onto mine, stifling my whimpers with his kiss. His fingers moved rhythmically in and out of me but all too slowly. I whined loudly in sexual frustration, his teasing act had my body feeling wired to explode but knowing it wasn't getting what it needed for release.

"Whining won't you what you want Bella," Edward said huskily into my neck as he lavished it with kisses, but he sped his hand up a little and as I moaned and panted he brought himself down on the side of me, pressing his hardness against my thigh. I fumbled with the waist band of his jeans, trying to find the buttons to release him but in my euphoria, couldn't find it. Edward pulled his hands away for a moment, ripping his pants open and placing my hands around his icy shaft and then went back to pleasuring me. I ran my hand over his tip, coating my hand and then ran it down his length. He hissed in my ear and then his hand moved faster and faster bringing me closer and closer to climax. Our mouths latched onto each others, kissing furiously and just when I was about to explode, he stopped.

"Fuck!" I screamed in his mouth but he just laughed darkly, staring in my eyes as he moved his hands between my legs again, bringing me just on the brink of orgasm again. Through my shallow breaths I begged him to let me finish but he kept bringing me there and letting me fall back over and over until I thought my body was going to rip in two.

"Edward...please...I...I need it!"

"Need what Bella, tell me what you need."

"I need to finish. Please!" I panted out as he brought me to the edge again.

"Finish what Bella?"

"Stop...teasing...me. Let me..Let me.."

"Let you what?"

"Cum! God Edward, please let me cum!"

Edward swiftly moved over me, placing himself at my entrance. His smoldering eyes were visibly darker than the amber eyes I had woken up to and they were shining with mischief as he stared down at me. He grazed my opening causing my body to twitch and attempt to pull him but he wouldn't let me.

"Say Mercy Bella."

His velvet voice seemed to travel from my ears, though my body, to my achingly swollen clit and I twisted up in one last attempt to pull him into me, all the while panting out

"Mercy...Mercy Edward Merceee...!"

With that, Edward slowly pushed himself all the way into me in one thrust. I cried out, drawing my legs up around his waist allowing him to plunge deeper into me. He grabbed my waist, thrusting into me over and over until my body locked around him and I came hard, screaming out his name and pulling his hair. Edward pushed into me one last time and I clutched him to me as he spilled into me cursing into the blanket by my head. We lay wrapped in each other for a few moments; our chests heaving as we came down from our orgasm high and then I heard Edward's throaty laughter as he rolled off me.

"What's so funny?"  
"I've never felt you finish like that...for a second I was scared you were gonna break it off."

"You would have deserved it for teasing me like that."Edward gave me the devilish have smile, moving to stand up. "I told you, you were gonna get it. I'm a man of my word." He pulled me to my feet, gathering up the blankets and ghosted us home. Everyone had a knowing smile on their face when we walked in the door, and we just grinned back heading up to the bedroom to shower.

The rest of the day went just as easy. We coasted through school with smiles on our faces. It was as if Tanya's death and the meeting with Jacob hadn't happened. By the time school let out for the day I was eager to get home and enjoy the evening in Edwards arms. When we got in the house, Rose was standing with her arms folded and her forehead pressed against the window. She looked like a beautiful as usual but her face so sad at the same time. She caught our reflection in the window and turned around smiling, but it was that same smile I had seen on Edwards's face the day he left me. Edward didn't say anything. He just walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her kissing the top of her head. Never since I had been around them, had I seen Edward and Rosalie show any affection towards each other that way. I had the sudden urge to go over there and hug her too, but thought against it and went upstairs instead.

When I walked in the room there were a bunch of bags on the bed, all of them from a ski shop and two plane tickets to Alaska. I started pulling all the items from the bag, they were obviously all for me save for a pair of snowboarding boots that were for Edward. He came in minutes later as I was trying on the coat.

"I take it we're going to Alaska this week?"I watched him nod in the reflection in mirror.  
"Weekend actually. That's all I need to probe Kate and Irina for information."

"I have a winter coat. Esme didn't have to do all of this."  
"You obviously have no idea how cold it gets up there," he said laughing as he helped me zip up the coat. It was a purple and black plaid pattern and heavily insulated. I hadn't even had the thing on 5 minutes and I was already sweating bullets.

"Well I'll sure as hell be warm in this thing." Edward pulled me towards him burying his face in my hair.

"My little snow bunny." He started unzipping the coat, looking at me through his lashes and smiling. "Would you like some help cooling off then?"

His cool breath washed over me and my mind started fogging over as my heart started pounding. Edward tilted my face upwards, brushing his lips over mine and my knees started to quake. He parted my lips with his, pulling my bottom lip into his mouth as I shrugged the coat off and then coiled my fingers into his hair, pulling my body flush with his. Edward slid his hands up the backs of my legs, over my ass and then underneath my shirt lifting it. Suddenly he froze, growling against my lips. I tensed up in his arms, panic making my heart pound even harder.

"Bella!"he hissed at me and I turned, looking in the mirror over my shoulder at what he was looking at. Eight little bruises lined my sides, right where Edwards fingers would be.

"You promised me you would tell me if I were hurting you."

I turned around pulling my shirt down, trying to hide my blushing face, and avoid his angry look.  
"I know Edward, and if you had of been hurting me, I would have told you. It's just a few bruises. Get over it."Edward leaned against the wall, pinching the bridge of his nose and shaking his head.

"Bella, Bella, Bella."

"Edward, Edward, Edward. You're over reacting as usual." I bounced in front of him pulled his arms down before wrapping mine around his neck. "Now, how is Rosalie doing?"

"She's going to be okay. She won't say it out loud but she's afraid of something."

I stepped away and nervously started folding the thermal shirts that were hanging out of the bags.

"Whatever this little secret you two are hiding, I will find out about it Bella so you might as well just tell me, save me some aggravation."

"I asked you before to leave it alone Edward. Can't you do that for me?"

I turned to him and saw the frustration on his face but he quickly composed himself and then ghosted to my side, pecking my cheek. "For now Love. For now. I'm going to go help Emmett and Jasper make new hockey sticks, I'll be in the garage if you need me."

With one last look at me, Edward took off down the stair. I hated keeping secrets from him, but I had made a promise to Rosalie and I intended to keep it. The sight of her having lost her best friend was sad enough. I didn't want to think about what she would look like if she lost everyone else she loved. She had gone through that once in her existence, and if there was anything I could do for her to keep it from happening again, I'd do it.

The rest of the week passed uneventfully as we waited for the weekend to approach. I had dinner with Charlie a few nights. Our relationship was slowly repairing itself but I knew it would never be the same. Edward was always polite when he came to pick me up, and Charlie tried his hardest to do the same but would always get upset when I got up to leave, though he never asked me to come back and I never offered.

When Friday came and we were on our way to the airport, Edward told me we would be staying in the family's cabin as opposed to the Denali clan's house which I was grateful for. It was weird enough having to be there in the first place. I slept for most of the plane ride, waking to Edward trying to put my coat on me. I took the coat from him, pulling it on and watched as the family suited up as well. Esme and Alice were pulling scarves over their heads wearing over-sized sunglasses. Edward stepped away from me, pulling his shirt over his head. I couldn't help ogling the well-defined muscles in his back and was shocked out of it by Rose nudging me with a black scarf in her hands.

"Here, it'll look weird if you aren't dressed like the rest of us."

"Why all the layers?"

"It's still a little sunny out. Alice doesn't see us be caught in it, but you know just to be safe." She smiled, helping me tuck the scarf into my coat.

"By the way Bella, I just want to say thank you... you know for..." she looked past me at Edward.

"Don't worry about it. You'd do the same for me right?"

She just smiled and pulled a pair of Christian Dior Sunglasses from her coat pocket.

"Be careful with these. They're my favorite."

We exited the plane last even though we were first class. When we stepped outside the airport I immediately knew why Esme had bought the new coat for me. It was sunny out yes, but the cold was biting at my cheeks. I pulled the scarf further around my face, following the family as they rushed into the two large SUVs that were waiting in the front. The window were tinted so dark not even a speck of light shone through and we waited patiently as the luggage handlers loading our stuff into the trunks. It had taken less than 10 minutes to get everything loaded in and I sat back, staring out the window as everybody started undressing when Carlisle drove off.

The area was beautiful; Edward leaned over me pointing things out and when we reached the cabin I was no less than amazed. Like their regular home, it was set deep in the woods, but the house itself on somewhat of a mountain. At the bottom there was a large man-made pond with goals at each end and the driveway was a narrow path, lined with thick evergreens.

Everyone buzzed around me, unloading the trunks as I took in the sight of the house. I walked inside to see that unlike the home in Forks, only the back wall was glass but the view was breathtaking. You could see for miles, stretches of mountains and trees. Next to the window was a sleek black grand piano with a two picture frames on top. I didn't have a chance to check them out because Alice snuck up behind me, steering me to the staircase.

"Edward asked me to take you upstairs and get you in front of the fire place until the place heats up enough. He and Emmett are downstairs getting the furnace going." She led me up the stairs, down a long hallway to a room at the end of it.

"Edward's room of course. He always takes the one furthest away from everyone else no matter how small it is. Sorry, but no bed this time. There is a couch though."

The room was almost like the one in Forks, just with less stuff in it. The carpets were a dark purple, matching the curtains that framed the windows. There was a black leather couch, facing the window and a 27"flat screen TV to the right of it. Shelves stocked with DVD's, books, and cd's lined the walls and tall lamps were in every corner. I felt heat on the backs of my legs and turned around to see Alice crouched over a fire place that was built into the wall.

"This was Edward's little sanctuary. He barely ever let anyone in it. We lived here after me and Jasper first joined the family, since it so out of the way." Alice took my bags and my coat putting them in the closet and then laid out on the couch.

"When um...when is the service going to be," I asked her as I sat on the arm of the couch.

"Tomorrow. Only Rose, Esme, Carlisle, and Emmett are going. Me, Edward, and Jasper are going to take you snowboarding and then we're leaving Sunday afternoon. Short trip but we'll have fun, don't worry.

"Edward's actually going to let me snowboard?"

Alice sat up with, looking at me like I was crazy.

"Let you? Edward isn't your owner you know. Plus he loves snowboarding and he thought you would too. If you're too scared, I'm sure he'll understand." She raised her eyebrow smirking at me and I laughed.

"No, I'm not scared. It's just not like him to let me do something potentially life threatening."

"I guess he realizes that you aren't as fragile as he thinks. Sure you have peach skin, but I'm sure you can take falling on your ass few times. You've been doing your whole life anyway."

Alice laughed, ducking her head when I tossed one of the pillows at her and then stopped abruptly, gripping the edge of the couch. Her lips were moving, but now sound was coming out and I waited, debating whether or not I should call someone. Alice sat up, reaching for me and shaking her head furiously.

"No, no, no. That can't be. That can't be right at all."She turned to face me, and I gasped, thoroughly frightened by the expression on her face. I had seen Alice have visions tons of times but this was different. Her eyes glazed over and then rolled into the back of her head and she was gripping my arm, not moving. She started shaking slightly and it was enough for me. I started screaming my head off, calling everyone in the family to come upstairs. Edward was the first in the room. He looked at Alice, and the dashed over to us pulling me away from her. Jasper followed, pulling Alice into his lap and held her tightly so she would stop shaking.

"Edward what is it. What is she seeing?"Carlisle asked blurring to our side/

"I can't make it out. Everything is moving too fast... it's just colors, a bunch of colors right now."

Alice's small voice started to come out, and everyone stood still. I tried to hear what she was saying but I couldn't over the sound of my own beating heart. Edward kept his eyes focused on her, and after 5 minutes he shook his head cursing under his breath. Seconds later, Alice came out it, launching herself at Edward and me, throwing her arms around us.

Edward cuddled us both, holding us tightly together and then craned his neck to look at Carlisle.

"We need to speak to them now. It can't wait. We need to know who this Red is as soon as possible."

"Edward, what is it? What did she see?"

"Red is back and she pissed. Alice saw her going up to the house and setting it on fire."

Esme hissed and the whipped out her cell phone. "Emmett, call the fire house and let them know to keep an eye out. I'm going to call Kate and Irina to come over here now. This situation is getting out of control." Emmett and Esme left the room, Rosalie shaking following behind them.

"Was that it Alice? Was there anything else?"

"I'm not sure yet, but there were figures, I couldn't see them clearly though. We were standing in front of them though, Edward and Bella in the middle I think the wolves may have something to do with it since I can't see clearly but I'm not entirely sure. Whatever it is...it just doesn't seem right."

Carlisle nodded and then left the room. I could feel that Jasper was sending calming wave throughout the room and Edward leaned back against the couch pulling me with him.

"First she goes to my house, and now yours. This is getting worse the longer we sit and wait."I muttered into Edward's neck. He held me tighter to him, rocking me slightly but I was in no mood to be babied. I felt angry, and Jasper reached over putting his hand on my arm.

"Bella, remember what I said to you. It's okay."  
"No, it isn't okay. You may be able to know what I'm feeling but you have no idea why."

I pushed myself out of Edward's arms, pulling away when he tried to pull me back down and walked over to the door.

"Where is Carlisle? I want to talk to him."

Alice peeked over the back of the couch at me. "Room at the opposite end of the hall."

I didn't wait for Edward's reaction, but did hear Alice tell him to let me go as I headed down the hall. Carlisle pulled the door open just as I was about to knock.

"Why don't you go get your coat? We'll take a drive to get you something to eat and we can talk then eh?" He winked at me and I turned running back for my coat. I met him in the garage, flushed red from Edwards trying to seduce me into telling me what was on my mind, but I was decided. There was only one real way to solve this problem and Edward wasn't going to be willing to hear me out.

"So what's on your mind Bella?"Carlisle asked as we pulled onto the main road.

"Lots of things. For starters, I'm sorry. I feel terrible." Carlisle reached over, taking my hand in his.

"Don't be, Esme spoke with the fire department. The house is fine and besides, it's just a house. It's not like any of us would have gotten hurt. I'm just grateful that we aren't there. It buys us sometime to figure things out."

"What do you think is going on Carlisle?"

"I think that whoever it is that killed Tanya, and came around looking for us...obviously is connected to James in some way. As for Alice's vision, that one I don't know. We'll know more when she does though. But don't worry, we'll keep you safe."

I shivered at hearing my own thoughts spoken out of someone else's mouth. I tried explaining this to Edward all week but he didn't want to listen to me. Sometimes he could be too stubborn for his own good.

"Well that's what I wanted to talk to you about. I don't want you guys to have to protect me anymore. I want to be able to protect myself. I don't want to be a burden anymore." Carlisle parked, and then turned to face me.

"Bella, trust me when I say you are no burden to us. I have never seen my son as happy as when he is with you. The time you were apart; well it was hell for me. Since I changed him, I've only ever wanted to see him happy and you make him happy. If for no other reason than that, I love you. But I also love you for yourself. I've come in contact with thousands of people in my years and there have been very few people that have been as pure, loving, and accepting as you are."

I blushed a little. I wasn't used to father figures being this open with me.

"Carlisle I need a favor from you. I don't know to ask you this, so I'm just going to say it. I'm just going to put it out there."

"Okay, I'm listening Bella."

"I want you to change me. Edward won't do it. He won't even consider it. But I don't really think it should be his choice. It's my life, and I should be able to do what I want with it."

Carlisle reached over, pulling my hat onto my head and smiled at me.

"I knew it was only a matter of time before you came to me." He turned away turning the car off and then reached into the glove box for his wallet. I waited, holding my breath for him to answer but all he did was turn back to face me and smile.

"So...will you do it," I finally asked him, unable to wait any longer. "Edward says the process takes three day. I could be like you by the time we go home and then if she comes around, well I could take care her myself."

Carlisle chuckled and I couldn't help wondering if all the Cullen men used their alluring laughter to avoid having to answer questions. If they did I could see who they learned it from.

"No Bella. I won't do that."I started to protested but Carlisle held up his hand stopping me.

"I'm not saying that I'll never do it. I'm just saying that I won't now. For one thing, it would take some preparation on our part. You can't just go missing. You have to think about your family. Two, newborn vampires are a handful. We can just bring you back town, you'd try to kill everyone and we can't risk that happening, for the sake of your conscience and to avoid fighting the wolves. And lastly, this isn't a decision that I would want you to make now. I know that you and Edward have spoken about this before, but I also know why you are choosing now to speak to me about it. Let's just get through this hurdle first and after a while, if you still want to do this...well the three of us can talk about it then. I love my son, and while I'm not completely objecting to you, I can't just ignore his feelings." Carlisle pulled me in and placed a kiss on my forehead.

"None of us resent you for anything that's happened. You are part of our family Bella and no matter what we protect our own."

Carlisle let me go and we walked into the supermarket. One of the best things about Carlisle is that no matter what you were talking about a minute ago, you can never feel uncomfortable around him. It's as if he just understands how you feel, no matter what, and while I loved Charlie dearly...it was nice to not have to deal with someone so stubborn all the time.

We got back to the house, roughly an hour and half later. There was a gold SUV parked in front of the house. Carlisle helped me out of the truck, carrying the groceries in his arms but when I started up the staircase he stopped me.

"Bella, let me go inside first okay." I nodded, moving so he would step in front of me and waited as he slowly opened the door. He stepped inside, holding me protectively against his back and when I peeked past his shoulder I could see why.

Kate was standing in the middle of the living room surrounded by the entire family. She was crouched low in an attack position, snarling. Venom was dripping from her teeth as she stared at Edward and Alice and then suddenly her eyes flickered to me. They were black as night and she had the same murderous glare that Tanya had, chilling me to the bone.

"Kaitlyn, don't do anything stupid,"someone who I assumed was Carmen said to her.

Her attention flickered to her for a split second and then time seemed to stop.

Kate launched herself in the air, her teeth bared and fingers curled, straight towards Carlisle and me. All I could hear was the sound of me own screaming as I closed my eyes and waited for her to tear me to shreds.

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**A/N Sorry about the cliff hanger but you know...that's my thing. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. It took me a while to write it so yea...**

**New Moon is out in about a month...who's pre-ordered their dvds already and from where. Apparently, depending on where you get it from it has different special features...so far I think Best Buy's is the best bet. Plus it comes in that awesome metal box.**

**I heard that some showings of "Remember Me" are going to have eclipse trailers...so if you didn't have an incentive to go and support Rob, now you do. Also he was executive producer so our boy can do more than act, be musically talented, and ridiculously sexy ...  
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	46. There's no Secrets this Year

**A/N What a crap past few weeks I've been having...the flu and an awful case or writers block caused by flu induced delirium. I'm getting better now though...**

**Hope you all enjoy this next chapter, it's mostly just a setting up for the chapters to follow...but i stuck in a few surprises to keep you entertained nonetheless...enjoy!

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**There's No Secret This Year**

**EPoV**

Carlisle twisted Bella out of the way and into my waiting arms sending Kate flying face first into the door. I backed Bella into the wall, crouching defensively in front of her as Kate spun on her heels and sprang to attack. She charged at me but Carmen had zipped in between us, clotheslining her, and she crashed to the floor in front of me. I lifted my foot ready to plant my boot in her face but Carmen pulled her up and tossed on the couch behind her.

"Calm down! Both of you!" She yelled. "We are family. We do not fight!" Carmen's eyes darted between us and I relaxed only after Eleazar and Irina grabbed Kate's arms and held her down on the couch.

"I see you have the same savage tendencies as your sister," I said smugly pulling Bella's trembling body back into my arms.

"Fuck you Edward!" Kate said from the other side of the room. "That's what got us into this whole mess… it's your fault my sister is dead…you and your stupid little pet."  
"My fault? How the hell is this my fault?"  
"Oh, don't play stupid with me. You know exactly how this is your fault. Your little stunt last year got my sister killed. That's how this is your fault."

Through her mind I saw pictures of Tanya, James, and then surprisingly the ginger-vamp in various incriminating positions. "So Tanya was like…dating both of them?" I asked trying to shake the mental images from my mind. My family all just stared at me bewildered including Bella.

"No," Eleazer said answering my question. "James and Victoria passed through here some time ago while Carmen and I were away. The girls allowed them to stay at our home and Tanya and James developed a relationship so to speak."

"They didn't even try to hide it from Victoria and James was such a jerk that he forced Victoria to join them on a few occasions, but then she got fed up and attacked Tanya, nearly ripped her head off and we made them leave," Kate added. "Tanya kept in touch with him; she would leave for days at a time to be with him and well you know what he was….she basically used him to get what she wanted. And she wanted you."

Carlisle started pacing the room between the Denali's and me, his mind processing all of the information we had and then he turned to me, saying aloud what I already knew.

"If this Victoria was his mate than I can see why she is after you…and it explains why she is after Bella as well…but what it doesn't explain is _how_ she knew to come after you."

Kate scoffed at him turning towards Irina and laughed. _And he's supposed to be so smart._ "There's an easy explanation for that Carlisle. Victoria passed through here months ago looking for James after you guys killed him, she went to Forks looking for Tanya at first even though we told her that she wouldn't be there."

Bella stiffened in my arms and then turned quickly pulling on my shirt. "Edward that must have been the first time she came around. She must have tracked James's scent to where you killed him and that's why she was behind my house."  
"And because the wolves were chasing her the whole time I couldn't see her around Bella!" Alice quickly added coming to our side.

"Okay….why didn't she try to get to Bella then?" The thought of it made me cringe.

Bella started shaking her head and then turn around to face Kate. "She wouldn't have come after me then, she wouldn't have known that I had anything to do with it until someone told her. So who told her? Which one of you told her to come after me?" Kate and Irina sat there innocently shaking their heads and I could tell from their thoughts that it wasn't either of them.

"It was Tanya," Carmen finally answered for and at this Esme hissed.

"How long have you known this Carmen?" Esme shouted. Carlisle went to her side wrapping his arms around her trying to calm her, but she was livid and both of us shot glances at Jasper who immediately started to calm her down. "Stop that Jasper!" She shook out of Carlisle grasp and got in Carmen's face. To her credit, Carmen stood there calmly but it was probably because we both knew Esme wasn't going to do anything but tell her off.

"I didn't know until a few days ago Esme, believe me. I would have told you immediately had I known sooner. It wasn't until Kate told me that she had spoken to Tanya days before she was killed what had happened. That's why I wasn't surprised when you told me you guys were having a problem. I kind of expected it."

"So what did Tanya tell you Kate?" Esme sneered at her.

"Tanya knew that Bella hadn't been changed and that Edward left her so when Victoria tracked her down the first time, she told her that it was all Bella's fault that James was dead and that she was unprotected. Victoria went there looking for Bella but you guys were back already and she went after Tanya again. Tanya ran to Volterra for protection and the last time I spoke to her she said she was tired of running and she was going to fight her and that if she lost that she knew Victoria would go after you guys."

"So now Tanya is dead and there a bloodthirsty vampire on the loose in forks. Wonderful." Bella sighed, sinking back against me and I wrapped my arms around her feeling just as exasperated.

"No, not blood thirsty Bella. Remember what Jacob said? She made a deal with Sam," Alice said sitting on the steps beside us.  
"Yea, and I'd bet you anything that Sam knows what she's after. Like he said to me…he doesn't mind sacrificing one to save many. If he knew all she wanted was me…he'd hand me over on a silver platter if he could."

Anger coursed through my body and I let go of Bella quickly so she didn't get hurt. The Denali's all tensed up, thinking that I was going attack them but I wasn't angry with them anymore. I was just angry period.

"If that's what he did, I'm not letting him get away with it." I growled out, "When we get back to Forks, I'm not going to sit around with my thumb up my ass waiting for the psycho to come after us. I'll take care of her and then I'm going to rip Sam's head off and _eat _it if he made a deal with her for Bella's life."

"Son, lets not get to hasty here. We don't want to provoke an unnecessary fight." Carlisle tried to grab my arms to stop my pacing but I moved away from him.

"Don't try to talk me out of it Carlisle. It isn't going to work. You guys don't have to come back with me if you don't want to fight. You can stay here; keep Bella with you until it all over. I'll handle this on my own."

I could see that Bella was about to protest but Emmett beat her to it. "Like hell you will Edward! I'm not letting you fight those mangy mutts alone. If you're going to fight them…then I'm going with you!"

Carlisle spun on his heels towards Emmett, wanting to laugh at Em's eagerness but knowing that he needed to be stern.

"Emmett we can't just go down there and attack them. You know that. Don't encourage him."

"Why not Carlisle? This situations needs to be handled before it gets any worse."

"I know that Emmett…and we'll deal with it but we aren't attacking anyone without cause."

"We have cause! I hate them…Edward definitely hates them now….I think that's cause enough."

"Emmett…" He turned back to me shaking his head and pulled Bella into his arms. "Edward, this is what we are going to do. We will all go home and when we get there we will track down this Victoria. We will try to reason with her first, if that can't be done…well then I won't stand in your way. I don't want her coming after any of my kids." He hugged Bella closer to him and she reached up and placed her hand over his. He looked down at her with fatherly love and protection in his eyes and that made me think back to what she could have possibly had to speak to him about.

"Bella, I'm going to need you to speak to Jacob, I need you to see if he knows any more details about Sam's deal and if he did indeed make a bargain for your life…well then Edward… we'll deal with him as well." Bella ripped herself out of his arms, her eyes frantically darting between the two of us.

"Deal with him? Deal with him how…Edward you heard what Jacob said…if you go after Sam they'll all come after you."

"So." Emmett said scoffing. "I'm not afraid to fight some mutant forest animals."

"I didn't say you were afraid, Emmett. I know you're not." Bella rolled her eyes and turned to me clutching my shirt. "Edward please, Jacob is my friend. I don't want you to fight him."

Carlisle put a calming hand on Bella's shoulder and I could see through his thoughts that he wasn't going to waver on his decision.

"Bella, we are not going to fight with the wolves. Don't worry. Not if we can avoid it. You know I don't like the idea of killing any sentient being and while I can understand Edward's anger, I don't think what Sam appears to of done warrants killing him." Carlisle turned to me to speak but I already knew what he was going to say, he was just verbalizing for the sake of everyone else. "The treaty we made calls for one of us to be physically harmed by them in order to fight, and unless that happens, no one…and I mean no one is to touch them unless provoked. They are…people too…with families that love them. Think about how we feel for one another and before you act Edward…Emmett."

The Denali coven's thoughts were quickly turning into ones of impatience. I had read their minds, raked over them with a fine tooth comb and didn't find anything else of any use so we parted ways for the night. Before leaving, Kate pulled me to the side and apologized but I got the feeling that there was more to her apology than she was letting on and that left me with an unsettling feeling.

Later that night, while Bella slept curled up on the couch with her head in my lap, I took the opportunity to tune into Carlisle's thoughts. I started to formulate ideas of what Bella could have talked to him about…I had a good feeling I knew but it would be useless to ask her and Carlisle mind was a fortress for the evening. Every time I tried to get in all I got were thoughts of the book he was reading to Esme and finally around sunrise I just gave up when he and Esme decided to carnally enjoy their morning.

The hours seemed to be ticking by slowly and with Bella being asleep I started to get restless. At some point during the night I had decided that we would enjoy the quiet of our home in Alaska while it lasted because the feeling that all hell would break loose when we got home was right there, staring me right in the face via Alice's visions throughout the night. I swung my legs onto the couch, rolling Bella until I was spooning her and proceeded to gently wake her by rubbing small circles on her stomach. Bella shuddered turning over in my arms, her lips searching for mine in her sleep but I toyed with her by kissing her cheeks instead.

"A girl could get used to the pleasant ways you've been waking me up lately," she breathed out throwing one of her arms over my side. I hugged her to me, kissing her forehead and breathing in the scent of her hair.

"What can I say; I like this sweet blushing Bella better than the angry little troll I usually get." Bella laughed, her chest rubbing against me and then she pressed throwing her leg over my hip and pulled herself against me.

"It's not my fault that you don't remember what it's like to wake up to some screaming in your ear or throwing you in the shower and spraying you with freezing cold water."

"It's not my fault you like to be lazy and not wake up for school on time." I laughed throatily nuzzling my face in her hair inhaling her heady scent. She relaxed in my arms, her heart rate evening out with her breathing as she burrowed herself deeper into my arms

"Edward, you won't hurt Jacob will you," she asked out of nowhere and then froze when I tensed up as jealousy flared up in me. I swallowed it back along with my anger venom and cleared me throat to answer her as calmly as possible.  
"I made a promise to you Bella, to always protect your heart. If you care for him that much…I will not lay a hand on him unless it is defense of one of the family." She nodded falling back to sleep. I shook her gently and her eyes popped open, her mouth curling into a little smile.

"Edward, are you bored?"

"No," I lied tucking my face back into the crook of her neck. "I just don't want you to sleep this beautiful day away. There's no one around for miles Bella. We could do whatever we want out here…and considering there is enough snow on this mountain for one of my favorite pastimes…I'd like to enjoy it with you. You know…a human experience."

"Fine Edward, I'll indulge you by strapping myself to a piece of wood and flying down the side of a mountain with you." Bella slid from my arms and I playfully pulled her back, pressing my lips to hers. I cupped the backs of her thighs, running my hands up between them and she shuddered when my fingertips brushed across her sex over her clothes.  
"You know you like the speed too" I whispered in her ear and I watched as she stumbled backwards with her eyes closed, her hands clenching the bottom of her t-shirt.

"You are definitely dangerous."

"That's what I've been trying to tell you all along." Bella shook her head smiling and headed off for the bathroom.

Out my window I could see Alice and Jasper pulling the boards out of the garage, the sun sparkling off their skin as they pretended to accidentally brush against each other. Alice bent over, adjusting the footholds on one of the boards for Bella and Jasper brushed up against her making her giggle and then they started chasing each other in a circle before collapsing in the snow and pressed their foreheads together just staring into each other's eyes.

Their love was a pure love. One that didn't always need words and grand gestures. The fact that they only had one wedding proved that. I could see me and Bella being that way. My feelings to take that next step with her were growing stronger and stronger each day but the fact that this threat was now standing in our way irked me. All I wanted for us was to graduate and marry…have as much of a life together as possible and as much as everyone said we were fated to be together it seemed as though we were anything but. Something was always standing in our way of just living happy comfortable lives.

I looked at my reflection in the glass mulling over Alice's thoughts from the night before. I'd admit that having Bella be one of us could potentially make things easier but on the other hand…The monster in the reflection stared back at me with taunting eyes that were dark with thirst, skin that was cold and pale like a corpse, and the ridiculous glittering from the sun shining on me. To prove a point I stopped breathing. I stood there for ten minutes waiting for some mental warning sign that I needed to breath- lightheadedness, a burning in my chest, anything- but of course there was nothing. All I was was a soulless pretty dead thing who had undeservedly won the heart of the most beautiful creature walking this earth. To even consider stealing her place among the angels from her made me feel like the most selfish and evil creature that ever existed.

I pressed my forehead to the glass, still watching my brother and sister share a quiet moment feeling envious that they didn't have to make such a choice. Their lives melded together so perfectly and while I had been truly blessed time and time again…the fact still remained that Bella's human life would always be threatened if not by some blood thirsty vampire than by some human danger. And then there was always the risk that our relationship would be exposed to the Volturi and suddenly cold fear ran through me. Tanya had been in Volterra when she was killed and no one is to be killed within the walls of Volterra. The guard could possibly be after Victoria already and with her being after us…they would be led right to us.

Bella walked into the room wrapped in a thick black towel. Her skin was reddened from the hot water and as she smiled at me in the reflection of the glass my heart felt like it was crumbling into a million pieces. If the Volturi were to find out…I didn't even care what would happen to me. I recalled quickly memories of Carlisle's time with them, the things he saw them do and cringed.

"You okay Edward?" Bella walked up behind me slowly, extending her hand to me and I reached behind me and pulled her to my back. She wrapped her arms around me nuzzling her face in my spine and held me tightly.  
"Whatever it is that's got you worried, forget about it. I know everything will be okay. Put whatever it is out of your mind and let's just enjoy today. Tomorrow is tomorrow Edward, and we are here today and nothing can touch us as long as we're together. Please stop worrying."

I pressed my forehead back on the glass unable to speak because I knew my voice would crack but there was my Bella, comforting me when her life was in danger. I turn around in her grasp and pulled her up against me. I could feel her warmth wrap around me like a cocoon and when she looked in my eyes, the love that was there made the world stop spinning. I pressed my lips gently to hers smelling the faint scent of her tears as wrapped her arms around my neck enveloping me in her scent. A small growl developed in my chest and I walked us slowly back to the couch and laid her down.

She still had that loving look in her eye as she grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled my face down to the crook of her neck as she rubbed my back beneath my shirt. I inhaled her scent pushing my growing erection against her and she moaned opening her legs and wrapping them around my thighs.

"Enjoy it while it lasts Edward. Even if we were to die tomorrow just knowing that I had your love makes my life worth living."  
"Bella, don't talk that way. I'm going to keep you safe if it's the last thing I do. I would stop the world if I had to if I meant keeping you alive." Bella hugged me tighter, rolling her hips into me, and ran her fingers through my hair.

"I'm not worried about that Edward. I know I'll be safe with you…I just don't want you to feel like any of this is your fault…I'd rather be swimming with sharks _with_ you than walking the world _without_ you. We're a family of 8 against one or okay…really 7 against one. What are you so worried about?"

I brushed my lips along her neck and she shuddered, her already fast beating heart speeding up. "Losing you Bella. My only fear is losing with you. Without you I might as well not exist." I whined into her skin all of a sudden overwhelmed by our love for each other. I could feel her shivering beneath me, the towel not providing enough protection from my cold but still she clutched me to her tighter, squeezing me with all her strength.

"Bella you're cold. Let me-  
"I don't care Edward. Just let me comfort you." I lifted her, ghosting in front of the fire place and laid her down on the plush carpet. The firelight made her skin glow and as she pulled a blanket around her she nudged me so I would lie on my stomach. She pulled the blanket over our heads, blocking out all the light and started to push my shirt off of me. I closed my eyes, reveling in her scent that quickly saturated the air under the blanket listening to the ruffling of material as she removed the towel from around her. She laid her top half over my back, hugging my shoulders and pressing her breast against me. I hissed when I felt her erect nipples rub against my skin but then her warmth started to melt into me and I let myself drown in her essence…in her love.

"We're in our own little world right now Edward, where nothing and no one can hurt us. There is nothing and no one between us. It's just me and you," she whispered in my ear and the feeling of her warm breath sent shivers down my spine. My tangled thoughts started to unravel, my muscles relaxing as Bella ran her fingers through my hair kissing along the my shoulders. Her heart pounded against me, her breathing becoming ragged, and I could smell her wanting me…wanting me to touch her and comfort her as she was comforting me. I leaned up; our bodies shifted beneath the blanket so that she was now under me but her arms were still wrapped around me.

"Somehow you always know…you always know what to do or say to make me feel better." I buried my face in her hair running my hand along her side and she arched into me, her chest heaving as my scent intoxicated her.  
"Because…Because I know you Edward…by…by now…I know every face you make…every move you make…I know what it means and I know…I know what you need….I was…I was made…for you."

I closed my eyes pressing my lips against the skin of her shoulder and ran my hand down her leg around her thigh. She opened up to me like a butterfly spreading it wings and I let my fingers brush against her. Her breathing hitched in her throat and she moved down so that we were face to face and her sex was pressing against my hand. I pressed my knuckles against her clit and she moaned softly into my mouth before molding her soft warm lips over mine. I good feel the heat emanating her and her scent growing stronger and stronger as her body temperature rose. I inhaled deeply, filling my lungs with her and masochistically enjoying the burning sensation that started in the back of my throat and spread throughout my body.

Bella brought her hands up to my face, pulling me more into her kiss and I lifted my lower half so she could bring herself beneath me.  
"I love you doesn't even cover half of what I feel for you," she whispered into my mouth before sucking my bottom lips in her mouth again. I groaned at the feel of her warm lips covering mine and the warm skin of her chest against me. My mind started spinning with want and need for her as I shimmied out of my pants and placed my achingly hard cock at her entrance. She was ready slick and wet and warm and as I pushed into her we both let out a long deep moan. Bella's body molded around me inside of her, a perfect fit, a key and it's lock and I could barely bring myself to move I was overcome from the feeling.

I cradled Bella's head in my hands and rested my arms on the floor. Even in the darkness of our love bubble I could still see her smiling at me, her loving eager eyes offering me comfort and love. I kissed her lips softly, rocking my hips into her and her soft moans were like a symphony written just for me. Bella wrapped her arms and legs around me, pulling me in and my body started to shake as I felt myself going deeper and deeper into her.

I wanted to tell her how much I loved her. I wanted to tell her how she gave my existence a purpose and that I would gladly give my life if it meant she would always be happy. I wanted to beg for forgiveness for bringing danger into her life and for not being normal for her but when I looked into her eyes again…I knew she knew. She knew what I was thinking…what I was going to say and she just smiled staring into my eyes as our bodies swayed together.

The pressure started to increase in my loins and I knew that I was so close to coming apart inside of her. I grabbed her hips, pulling them into me and gave her one long slow stroke, making sure every inch of me slid over every inch of her and she stopped breathing, closed her eyes tightly and moaned loudly arching he head back against the floor. My vampire site allowed me to see every glorious bit of her, her flushed red skin and beautiful face contorted into an expression of ecstasy and I stroked her again feeling her legs quiver around me.

"Again…please…again.." she panted out and I obliged her, pushing myself into her and with drawing slowly so that my cock slid across her g-spot slowly for the entire length of me.  
"That feels…so…please….please…"she stammered out and I did it again. This time pushing hard and pulling her hips down onto me more to increase the pressure. Her legs began shaking violently around me, her blood practically boiling she was so ready to explode so I leaned over her and took her mouth in a hungry kiss, pumping my hips into her, anticipating her crash. After only 30 second she had fistfuls of my hair, pulling on it and crying into my mouth as her walls clenched around me.

What I hadn't anticipated was the sudden rush of venom that flooded my mouth and I violently ripped my mouth away from hers and mashed my face into the floor by her head. Bella's orgasm felt like it was never going to end and as her walls clenched around me over and over again, her hot wetness pouring out between us and I exploded, growling and digging my fingers in the floor around her. She was completely oblivious to my loss of control and whimpered only when I momentarily lost control of my body weight. I wrenched myself out of her, my chest heaving as I fought to regain control of my senses. I felt Bella's hands on my chest, her light musical laughter as she ran her hands over the planes of my chest and the warmth of her hands instantly grounded me.

"That was intense was it not?" she asked laughingly and pulling me down to rest against her.  
"Understatement. I almost crushed you."  
"You may have moved an ovary but I'd hardly say you were going to crush you. After all this time you still don't know how innately aware you are of my presence?"

I rested my head on her chest and she curled her fingers into my hair, absentmindedly running her fingers through it as I let the sound of her heartbeat further calm me.

"You two look ridiculous you know that?" I peeked my head from underneath the blankets to see Alice crouching in the doorway.

"No more ridiculous than you. You look like you're about to pee on my carpet. Go away." I mumbled and Bella laughed beneath me, turning on to her stomach and peeking her head out too.

"Morning or err…afternoon…I guess it is."

"Everyone's back from the services and since we missed the chance to go boarding, Jasper said for you to get you broody horny ass down to the lake so we can play ice hockey."

_I'm glad you're enjoying this time now Edward and I'd make the most of it as possible…because I have no idea what we're going home to. I had another vision while Jasper and I were out um…while we were outside and everything disappeared. Don't worry Bella…she looks to…happy._

I leaned down kissing the top of Bella's head keeping my eyes locked on Alice's. She and Bella continued chatting about the snowboarding and ice hockey while Alice replayed everything in she saw in her head for me. What she saw was us making it to Forks uneventfully but when we arrived home there was nothing. I thought it best to take Bella home to Charlie's until we could figure it out but still there was nothing in our futures. Such was Alice's and my ability to communicate non-verbally that when I wrinkled my nose she knew I was asking if she thought the wolf pack was involved.

_Probably but in all honesty I don't think it would be a good idea to leave Bella alone. We should stick together. You two can arrive separately..let the rest of us going check things out before you get there._

I moved my lips across the top of Bella's head shaking my head no and my silly little lamb reached up and pushed my face away. Clearly it was irritating her.

_Okay so we stick together. Sounds like a plan._ "Okay you guys, get dressed and meet us outside in 15..." Alice flitted from the doorway and I bundled Bella up and my arms and pulled her to her feet.

"Vampire ice hockey…tell me there some rock or mountain I can hide behind because I really don't want to get hit in the face by Emmett's slap shot."  
"Don't worry, Emmett's only allowed to be goalie after he dislocated Esme's shoulder last time." Bella's mouth fell agape with horror and 20 minutes later she knew why it wasn't really that big of deal.

From Bella's perch on the boulder she requested Emmett and I move for her, she watched as our "mother" ran us into the ground. We played three against three, alternating Rosalie in whenever one of us suffered an injury. The first few times I had to console Bella's crying when she watched Jasper whack me in the knee with one of the metal hockey sticks we had fashioned and she nearly fainted when Esme sent the titanium puck flying into Emmett's shoulder and heard the bones crunch from the impact. He flashed over to her shaking his awkwardly hanging arm in her face saying "cool isn't it". Of course minutes after holding it in place he was fine and Bella got a firsthand look at how indestructible we really are.

After playing for 4 hours straight, we finally called quits our ongoing game and that was only because I noticed Bella's teeth were chattering loudly in her head. I bundled her up in the blanket we brought out for her and flashed her back up to the house where Esme made her homemade venison stew from the deer that Emmett drained and decided to mount on his bedroom wall. Soon we were all curled up in front of the flat screen with our mates watching movies. Everyone's thoughts centered on how peaceful everything was and how all wanted to just get home and deal with the problem so we can move on. It filled me with a sense of peace that everyone was so relaxed, well everyone but Alice. She kept trying to see past or what was blocking her. She became certain that had to do with wolves and after Bella fell asleep she voiced this to everyone. We decided to tread cautiously after Esme suggested that they could be coming in peace. Carlisle's thoughts mirrored mine. They could have called.

After putting Bella in my room, I finally hit the slopes to blow off some steam. Jasper, Carlisle, and Emmett followed me out and Carlisle managed to sneak Emmett's beloved deer's head out the house. Emmett chased him down but where Carlisle lacked in bulk he made up for in speed. The head went flying through the trees and none of us bothered to find out where it landed. Carlisle had too good of an arm. We arrived back at the house just as the girls were loading up the cars.

_They get to go snowboarding all night while we have to do all the hard work. Men. Vampire or human…they are all alike._ I laughed at Rosalie as she scowled at Emmett and went over to Bella who was trying to heave one of her heavy bags out to the car.

"Let me get that for you love." I kissed cheek and her eyes lit up as she yanked the bag away from me.  
"You don't have to do everything for me Edward. I have two hands and two feet." She pecked me on the lips again and dragged the bag to the car throwing it in the trunk. An hour later we were boarding the plan, the overcast day allowing us to roam freely without our cover up. The flight back to Washington was peaceful in that we were all trying to remain calm and prepare for what we were going home to. Bella seemed a nervous wreck, chewing on her fingernails and a shot a glance at Alice behind me raising an eyebrow.

_Of course I told her. She knew something was up anyway and when she tried to get in touch with that mutt she's friends with she couldn't get in touch with him._

I nodded my head at her turning back to Bella but she seemed deep in her own thoughts so I just watched her. One of the flight attendants kept hovering annoyingly over us, her thoughts revolving around getting me to join the mile high club with her so I slipped my hand into Bella's and leaned in close to her whispering loud enough for the stewardess to hear me and suggestively asked if she wanted to help me wash my hands in the bathroom. I hadn't intended to turn my charm on full blast but when Bella turned back to face me, the delicious red hue tinged her cheeks and she couldn't even answer me. I couldn't help but laugh and kiss her. Needless to say the stewardess left me alone after that.

Everyone was on full alert when we pulled onto the road that led to the house. The weather was warm and thick with the smell rain and wolf. They had been in the area and from the smell of it they were still near. Bella sat in the back seat of Bee with me, stroking my hand as I tried to tune into all the thoughts around me. Carlisle pulled into the long stretch that led to our house, Jasper pulling in behind him and even from inside the car we could smell them.

"Carlisle they're on our land. That's a clear breech of treaty. Don't tell me we aren't going to fight them now?" Emmett asked in the other car but just as he was asking I heard the steady stream of thoughts coming from the four wolves that were running laps around our house and one of them was Jacob.

_We know you're here…don't attack. Sorry about breaking the rules but I couldn't get in touch with Bella all weekend. I hope to God you didn't do what I think you did because we've got enough problems to deal with as it is._

"It's just Jacob and three of his friends. Relax; they didn't come here for a fight. Apparently they came to warn us of something." Everyone in the Mercedes heard me and I pretended to ignore the fact that when I said Jacob, Bella's cheeks flushed red. We pulled up to the front of the house and climbed out of the car, each of us still in defense mode just in case. I held Bella protectively behind me but she tried to wiggle out of my grasp.

"Oh come on Edward, you said it's Jacob. He isn't going to hurt me." She rolled her eyes and started to walk towards the trees, her eyes scanning the woods but Emmett yanked her back behind him.

"People lie Bella. Don't be stupid. We don't know what the hell's been going on down here and I'm not about to let one of those mangy mutts take you down."  
"Emmett, Jacob wouldn't lie…he's not stupid. He's not going to do anything. Would you guys just relax please.

The wolves were waiting for us to do just that but the scent was naturally making us stand on edge.

_Seriously blood-sucker, we didn't come here to fight with you. I've got news about Sam and that vamp chick. You guys need to chill out so we can have a heart to heart. I'm coming out human but my guys are gonna stay in wolf form got it._

Watching the phase back through Jacob's eyes was something else. I could almost feel my muscles and organs contorting and moving around as he phased back and then I realized he was naked. I instinctively reached out and covered Bella's eyes.

"Edward, what the hell are you doing?" She kept trying to wiggle away from me but I didn't let her go until I saw him pull on the pair of shorts that was tied to ankle.

"Alright. I'm coming out. I've got three of my guys here and Edward you know how quick I can phase. Do not attack me. No one came here to fight," Jacob called from the cover of the trees. Everyone sighed impatiently, shifting their weight into more relaxed positions.

"Well come one then. We're not going to attack if you don't." Alice called back. Her mind was buzzing with frustration and nervousness. Rosalie kept her hands curled ready to attack though she appeared to just be looking at her fingernails. Emmett stood in front of her with his arms crossed leaning back but we all knew that in a split second he would be able to throw all his weight forward and barrel into something with enough force to destroy buildings.

Jacob stepped from behind the trees with his hands help up slowly. The three wolves' followed behind him, each of them just as wary as us.

"That's close enough Jacob." Carlisle said stopping him 10 feet away from us. "What can we do for you?"  
"We've got big problems down at the rez and we wanted you guys to be aware. That ginger vamp came back looking for you guys and were pissed when you weren't around. She picked off two campers out in the woods out behind Bella's."

Bella grip tightened around my hand and she looked up at me, her eyes full of fear.

"Ja..Ja…Jake…Is my Dad….is Charlie…?"  
"Charlie is fine Bella. I ran interference. She was gonna go after him but I didn't let her near the house and my dad and I convinced him to stay with us for the weekend." Bella exhaled in relief, slinking back against me and I wrapped my arms around her.  
"You were…and it kills me to admit this… but you were right. Sam does know what Red's after and he made a deal with her to look the other way while she takes Bella out."

I didn't even realize the amount of noise I was making until Emmett came over and squeezed me in a bear hug. "Cool it man. Chill out and let him finish what he's got to say. We'll get him Edward." He turned towards the wolves who were scratching at the dirt in front of them ready to charge. "And we will…so I suggest that if you guys-

"Emmett!" Carlisle said coming to stand between us. "We already talked about this. No one is attacking anyone. Got it!" he turned back to Jacob who looked like he was getting ready to phase, "Okay, Jacob is it? We know what she wants…and why she wants it so we'll handle it from here. Thank you for being so kind as in to come up here and let us know what's going on."

"You don't know the half of whats going on. Sam and Red are no longer playing for the same team. After she plucked off those two campers Sam lost it and now he wants Bella. He thinks all this…her being here…you guys coming back is all her fault. He ordered me to get Bella to come down to the rez so he could take her and like sacrifice her."

"Why don't you big bad wolves just kill her then?" Rosalie asked angrily. Shockingly she was almost as angry as I was.

"In the beginning it was because Sam ordered us not to attack her and when an Alpha makes and order we've got no choice but to obey."

It was then that I noticed something was different about Jacob than the last time I had seen him. He looked bigger and there was an air authority about him. As he spoke his thoughts filtered through to me."You separated from you pack didn't you," I said cutting him off, "The four of you…you're not part of Sam's pack anymore."

"No, we're not. I don't believe in sacrificing people in a deal with bloodsuckers. It's just sick and neither do they. And the fact that it's Bella makes it worse." Bella blushed next to me and I snarled when Jacob had a thought running his tongue around her red cheeks while she squirmed and giggled naked in his arms.

"Do you mind?" I sneered at him but he just laughed. I felt like punching his head off.

"Anyway, after we separated from Sam's pack we weren't under his thumb anymore so we tried chasing after her ourselves. Figured we could have her taken care of before you guys even came back, this way Bella wouldn't be in any danger, but she's tricky. The four of us, we can't seem to catch her. Every time we get close she slips through a crack somewhere. It's frustrating."

"I appreciate your help and I all," Alice started, "But if she's as tricky as you say I need you guys to stop chasing after her. If I can see her then I can know where's she going. We'll have a better chance of catching her if I can see past you."

I could tell the wolves had no idea what she meant and turned to her laughing.  
"Alice they don't know."  
"Oh."  
"Don't know what blood-su… I mean Edward?"

"Alice can see the future but she can't see anything when you guys are involved. In order for her to watch Victoria's moves, you guys can be in the picture."

"Victoria?"

"Red…follow along…it isn't that hard. We need you to stop chasing her so we can see what going on."  
"So how are you going to watch for Sam is you can't see us? I have no idea what they are planning and we can't physically can't attack each other with the intent to kill. It's one of those wolf things."

"I guess we'll just have to hunt that dog down old-fashion style," Emmett said moving in front of Rosalie more.

"Yea, well you won't have any interference from us. I'd tear him apart myself for wanting to hand over Bella to that bloodsucker. So what should we be doing so we stay out of your way?"

Alice closed her eyes, thinking hard, trying to find away to see around them. First she thought of having them go back to the reservation and try and watch Sam for her but she couldn't see if that would work. She even tried standing closer to Jacob to see if being in closer proximity would familiarize her mind with him but that didn't work. After about ten minutes she gave up.

"Just do nothing, I can't see over, around, or through you so just do nothing but if you do catch wind of something before we do just call the house." She fished around in Jasper's pocket for paper and wrote down our house number while eyeing Carlisle to see if it was okay. He gave her a nod and she handed Jacob the paper before flitting back behind Jasper.

"Now that you're separated from your pack Jacob," Carlisle started, "I feel that we should sit down at some point and re-work the details of the treaty. There are some new things that need to be taken into consideration." When he said this he glanced at Bella. Jacob followed his eyes and grunted in response and then we said our thank you's and goodbyes. As I turned Bella towards the house there was a trembling in her knees and she looked back at Jacob.

"Edward, can I…I'd like to go see Charlie. Can…Can I ask Jacob to take me?" Again the jealousy washed up in my throat practically choking me when I looked back at Jacob's expectant face.  
"Bella I don't think that's a good idea. If you want to go see Charlie I'd feel better taking you myself, at least this way if something happens we can be warned.  
"Edward please, Jacob won't let anything happen to me and besides," Bella looked down at her feet and I didn't need to read her mind to know what she was going to say, "I miss my friend. Please?"

I sighed pinching the bridge of my nose and nodded, not letting her see my face so she wouldn't how jealous I was that she wanted to go run off with her half dressed extremely buff "friend".

"Thank you Edward." Bella grabbed my wrist and pulled herself in my arms. She pressed herself against me, wiggling a little and when I bent leaned forward to kiss her, she kissed me so hard that but the time she pulled away to breathe I was poking her in the stomach. She pressed her hand against my erection and looked up at me from underneath her lashes with a half-smile that could have countered my own.

"Save that for me for later would you? I won't be long."

I laughed, curling my fingers in her hair and pressed my lips to her forehead before taking a deep breath and exhaling over her. She stumbled a bit as she walked over to Jacob and then blew a kiss at me from over her shoulder before climbing in her truck and driving off.

I watched from the porch as they drove out of sight smiling. Somehow she always knew.

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**A/N Sam's a douche right? Hope you all enjoyed that even though i know it's not some of my best work..but as i mentioned i did have the flu and have spent the last two weeks seeing little green men running around my room stealing my socks.**

**So who saw the trailer tease? It was such a tease but i liked how they made about the love story part and not the crazy vampire fight part...I'm getting my knickers in a knot already**

**And who's going to see Remember me on Friday? All you Rob fans should be going out to support him...he executive produced this film and im just hoping to hear his lovely voice on the soundtrack but i wont get my hopes up...don't want to be disappointed...**

**As always i thank my fans for reading and sticking with me...when it gets closer to the end I'm gonna take a poll on whether the sequel to my tale should be with/without Renesemee so start thinking..  
**

**Also be sure to check out my new story...Another Heart Calls...it's my newborn and it need love!**

**oh yea...please review...love you all...lots and lots and lots to bits  
**


	47. Paint it Black

**A/N So here is the next chapter. We are nearing the end and I'm oh so sad...but there will be a sequel so all will be right in my world.**

**Hope you all enjoy this really exciting (well at least i thought it was) chapter! Read...enjoy...and review people!!!!**

* * *

**Paint it Black**

**EPoV**

Thankfully Bella made it home unscathed. After a long shower she crawled into bed where I was waiting for her. The dog stink was gone, replaced by her strawberry scented shampoo and naturally delicious scent.

"Have fun with Clifford?"I asked her, pulling the blankets up around us. It took her a second to get the joke, but then she rolled her eyes and laughed.

"Ha Ha, very funny." She lay down on her side facing me running her fingers through her hair pursing her lips in that cute way that she does. "Charlie is freaking out about those campers that got killed. He even told me to tell you to be careful since he knows you "hike" so much. I hurt my foot kicking Jake underneath the table because he was laughing so hard."

"I'm sorry Love. Would you like me to kiss it and make it feel better?"

I fished underneath the blankets and she squirmed around giggling, trying to get away from me but I caught a hold of her ankle. She gasped when I slid my hand up her bare leg and gripped the back of her thigh hitching it over my waist. Our bodies pressed against each other and I could feel her pert nipples rubbing against my chest through the thin material of her shirt. Rolling onto my back, I pulled her with me so she was straddling my waist.

"Edward, are you going to leave me behind when you go look for Victoria?"Bella whispered leaning down to kiss me.

"That would be the safest way to go about this don't you think? Tracking isn't really one of my strong points, so I'd hate to accidentally run into her in a place that isn't safe for you."

Bella sat up, staring down at me with a teasing look on her face. "Edward Cullen has a weakness...I don't believe it."

"Oh, I have many weaknesses Love. More than you would believe."

"Oh yeah, care to fill me in on what they are...You know...just so I know."

"I'm afraid I can't disclose that information to you ma'am. You might use it against me...you know the way use that sound you make when I do this- I pulled her face down pulling her bottom lip between mine. She moaned into my mouth eliciting and instant hard on. I flipped us over, pushing into the bed not ready to let her feel what she was doing to me with the way she was running her fingers through my hair and wrestling my tongue in her mouth.

Her body started warming up as she became more aroused; her scent saturated the air around us igniting a fire in the back of my throat. I groaned, swallowing back the venom and rolled over so that we were back onto our sides. With my arms wrapped around her, and her neck cradled in my hands, I kissed her deeper. Bella squeezed my biceps weakly, barely breathing so I pulled back giving her a moment to catch her breath. I kissed her chest, letting my lips brush across her skin and she shuddered, her legs quivering around mine. Her eyes we closed, head thrown back, lips slightly parted as she panted and breathed out my name. The sight was awe inspiring. So awe inspiring that it inspired me to do something else.

"Bella," I mumbled into her skin. "Bella, I want to ask you something."

"What...what is it Edward."

I pushed her onto her back, hovering over her on my knees. Bella placed her hands on my stomach, running them up as far as she could, making her breast squeeze together. I was losing my concentration.

"You wanted to ask me something Edward?"

"Oh, um yea. I...I um..." I shook my head, clearing it of the thoughts coming from the rest of the house. It was too hard to focus on what I was trying to say with the way she was looking at me.

"Bella...I...Will you..."I couldn't find the right words to say it. It had to be perfect...she deserved that.

"I wanted to ask if you would drive to school tomorrow."

"What?"Bella pulled herself up and looked at me like I had three heads.

"Can you...Do you want to drive the Volvo to school tomorrow?"

"Um...sure if you want me to." Bella flopped back against the pillows and closed her eyes, but I could see the knowing smile twitching in the corners of her mouth. My love...she knew me to well. Laughing to myself I lay back beside her, pulled her into my arms, and kissed the top of her head. "I love you Bella."

"I love you too."

The next morning I didn't need read Alice's thoughts to know why she was laughing at me. I was bothered until we got to school and I realized just how tiring the day would be. She had to play human and watch out for us the whole time. We were weary to leave the house in the first place, but Carlisle insisted that we go for Bella's benefit. We'd graduated numerous times over, but Bella still on round one.

The rest of the week was pretty much the same. Bella had dinner with Charlie Friday while I waited outside and I could see through his thoughts how jumpy she was. Every little thing would make her nearly jump out of her skin. They watched a movie together and after he started to fall asleep, she drew the afghan over him and crept out of the house. I met her at the door, walked her to car letting her lean her exhausted body on me. When we got to the house she slid onto the couch, cuddling next to Esme.

"I don't know how you guys do this pretending all day, every day. I'm exhausted." Esme smiled pulling Bella's head onto her shoulder and patted her head.

"I'm sorry honey. I know it's tiring but hopefully it'll all be over soon." She hugged her, glancing over at me. "Edward honey, why don't you run Bella a nice hot bath and I'll get her some tea. It's looking like its going to be a quiet night."

We smiled at each other and Bella reached for my hand. "That actually sounds like a great idea." She sauntered pass me and Esme smirked laughing at us in her head. _I guess you won't need me after all. Good...your father will be home soon and I'm due for a check-up._

"TMI Esme. TMI."  
"Oh, come now, you're just as bad as the rest of us now...and it's not like you wouldn't know any way." She waved her hand dismissively, laughing, and turned back to the tv.

I dashed up the stairs, moving through the dark bedroom into the bathroom to where Bella had lit candles and placed them all around. The lights flickered off the reflection of the mirror and the glass of the shower door. She was perched on the side of the tub, that silly little yellow towel wrapped around her and she was running her fingers through the water and bubbles that were filling it.

She hadn't heard me come in the room so I was able to just watch, drink her in. Her hair fell in tousled waves around her back. She dropped the towel so that it fell around her waist and she raised her arms running her fingers through hair and let it flop back against her back. She was beautiful. She was my goddess...and I loved her.

"Bella," I said, ghosting to her side. She jump, teetering on the edge of the tub and I grabbed her arm before she fell in.

"Oh, I didn't even hear you come upstairs." I pulled her naked body up, flush with mine and let the towel drop to the floor. She shivered in my arms but curled her hands over my shoulders and stood on her toes to kiss me. "Care to join me?" she added, glancing over her shoulder at the tub.

"I would Love, but the water would get cold to fast. Why don't you get in and I'll wash your back for you." Bella kissed me again and then nodded, turning to step into the tub. I held her hand to make sure she didn't fall and she submerged herself into the water. The bubbles crowded around her so that her beautiful body was obstructed from my view. I swept bubbles onto my finger and put them on her nose making her giggle.

"When this is all over Bella, after graduation, I want to take you someplace. Take you away. We'll go on vacation for the summer...Just me and you. Would you like that?"

"If you're there of course I would. It would be nice to get away with you for a while." Bella sloshed around in the water, making the bubbles move and giving me clear glimpses of her beautiful body. I felt myself getting hard, waiting for her next movement when she covered my hand with hers, sliding it up my arm. She pulled my hand to her face, held it there and closed her eyes. My thumb swept across her soft lips and she purred, closing her eyes tighter.

"Bella, do you have any idea how beautiful you are?"

"You tell me quite frequently as a matter of fact. However...do you have any idea how beautiful you are?"

"Hmmm...my beauty was created...yours is natural. That's far better."

"Does that mean you wouldn't think I was beautiful anymore if I ended up like you?" She opened her eyes wide, staring at me, and for a moment I was speechless.

"I've...I've seen what you would look like...through Alice's mind...It's...marvelous...but not worth your life...even if I'd have the most smokin hot girlfriend that ever lived...I already do anyway."

Bella blushed, smiling and looked away. I knew she hated it when I complimented her but I couldn't help it. As part of my mission to make up for my leaving her, I vowed to make her realize just how beautiful she was and how much I loved, wanted, and needed her every day.

She laid back, sinking further into the tub and her knees poked out of the water. I could smell the scent of her arousal, muddled by the soapy water, but there none the less. Taking the bath sponge in my hand I wet and ran it over her shoulders underneath the water. She sat back up taking the bath sponge from me and placed my hand back on her chest. I ran my hand across her, gently squeezing her breasts. She moaned pushing into my hand and reached out grabbing my shirt. I sank to my knees, pressing my lips to hers and her fingers curled into my hair as we kissed. My erection was throbbing in my pants and I freed it, sighing with relief, and dragging my hand down Bella's torso. She opened her legs reaching between them to guide my hand to her sex. My fingers flitted across her and she squirmed around my hand kissing me harder. One of her hands shot out of the tub and she grabbed me, squeezing hard and pulling. The action caught me off guard and I hissed falling backwards.

"Oh My God! Edward are you okay?" Bella said laughing, leaning out of the tub.

I lay on my back for a second, staring at the ceiling before I cracked up laughing with her.

"Only you Bella, only you have the ability to turn me into a bumbling idiot." When I looked up she was still smiling, trying not laugh at me.

"Well now you know how I feel every time I fall on my ass in front of you."

"When's the last time you've actually fallen...I always catch you when you fall."

"Emmett doesn't." She raised her eyebrow laughing as I sat up, tucking myself away.

"That's only because Emmett enjoys slapstick comedy and you my love are the funniest of the all." Bella grabbed her towel from the floor, throwing it at me but I dodged around it, flashed in front of her, and smothered her with a kiss. She was laughing and kissing me at the same time that I pulled her from the tub. I grabbed the towel with one hand and wrapped it around her back.

"Who...said...I was done?" she panted out as I carried her to our bedroom. I laid her down on the bed, buried my face in her neck, lavishing it in kisses, enjoying the warmth of her body as she wrapped herself around me.

"You're not done yet...but shortly...you will be...out like a light."

Kissing her, I wrapped my hands around her thighs pulling her legs up higher. Fighting the dizziness, she kissed me back and clawed at my shirt to pull it over my head. I broke away from her mouth trailing kisses along her face to her neck and across her chest. Her body quivered beneath my lips and her soft moans traveled through my ears straight to my cock, stiffening me again. Eager to be one with her, I ripped my pants off, sliding up between her legs. I could feel the heat pouring out of her in waves and she grabbed my arms bracing herself for me.

"I love you Edward."

"I love you too Bella," I said reaching over her head for the remote to our space heater. I kissed her softly, letting her run her hands over my body as I waited for it to heat up. The last time we tried to go at it without waiting, she got so cold her teeth were chattering.

"Are you worried Edward...about what's going to happen with Victoria and Sam?"

"No," I said kissing her shoulder. "I'm sure everything will be fine. Alice and I have been talking to Jasper about leaving tomorrow to look for her."  
"I don't really like the sound of that...If its all the same to you, I'd rather you not. I'd rather you just stay right here with me." She gripped my arms, pulling me closer.

"I'd rather be with you too Bella. Trust me."

Bella molded her soft warm lips over mine and I wrapped my arms around her back, rocking my hips to slowly enter her. She whimpered into my mouth, wiggling her hips around me. We melded into each other, swaying with a perfect rhythm as Bella panted and moaned, pulling at my hair until I felt her pushing my shoulders for me to roll over.

I did, not breaking our connection and Bella grabbed my wrists, pulling so I'd put my arms over my head. She smiled, leaning forward to kiss me when I did, and began rocking her hips on me. Her breast slid across my chest, setting me afire and the tightness of her angle turned my stomach into knots. Her body started to blaze around me, boiling her blood to that delicious temperature that made my mouth water. I broke her hold on my arms, grabbed her waist and held her so that I could pump into her without hurting her. She threw her head back, crying out my name, and her walls clenching around me setting off my own orgasm. I loved it when we came together.

"You're amazing,"she said collapsing against me. I wrapped my arms around her kissing the top of her head. "As are you my love...for so many reasons."

"I don't like your plan just so you know. What if something happened to you while you were gone? I couldn't bear it. Where ever you go I'm going. Even if it's into the pit's of hell, I'd follow you into the dark."

"Nothing is going to happen to me Bella, or you, or anyone in the family. Charlie will be fine as well. Alice has been looking out for him too."

"We have a lot to thank her for. She doesn't have to do all this but.."

"But she does because she loves us."

"I love her too...I hope she knows that...that I appreciate everything she does even when she forces me to go shopping with her."Bella snickered, cuddling herself into my side, laid her head on my chest, and tangled her legs with mine.

"I'm sure she knows Love...but there are always little ways to show her."

"We should do something nice for her, you know when this is all over."

"I can think of a few things that would make her happy." I smiled to myself thinking of how Alice begged me to let her plan the wedding once she saw me asking Bella. I'd be willing to marry Bella anywhere but I wanted our wedding to be magical and Bella would be too worried about the cost to do what she really wanted.

As I watched "The Pirates of the Caribbean" trilogy, Bella slept peacefully in my arms. The birds were starting to chirp and sunlight was just beginning to creep through the windows. I closed my eyes, relaxing and thinking about how it would be nice to sit by the creek. It would be warm out, warm enough for shorts and Bella would enjoy sitting with the sun on her face while I enjoyed watching her. I closed my eyes, listening to the sounds around me: Bella's steady breathing and heartbeat, Alice laying in bed while Jasper sang to her, Carlisle and Esme lazily laying in each others arms talking about their next visit to the isle, Emmett and Rose playing the new Xbox game she bought for them, and the sound of paws padding through the dirt.

Apparently I was the first to notice it. I shot out of the bed startling Bella awake. She looked at me wide eyed and scared as I threw a sweatshirt, pants, and shoes at her from the closet.

"Get dressed Bella! Now!" In her sleepy haze she fumbled with the clothes and just as I was about to help her, Alice burst through the door, taking charge and dressing her herself.

"Don't worry Edward...I mean I can't see anything but that doesn't mean we should worry. Everything will be fine Bella don't worry. Edward, how many are there and where do you want me to take Bella, where do you want me to go? Oh I don't want to leave Jazz...damn those mutts if he gets hurt I'll kill them all I swear. Edward, Bella can't wear sneakers without socks...why didn't you give her socks...Don't just stand there! Get me a damn pair of socks!

I tossed a pair of socks at her listening to Sam's thoughts filter through to me.

"There are four of them. Sam, Paul, Jared and a girl wolf. Leah."

"Well are they going to attack us? Do you know?" Carlisle said from the doorway. Esme rushed past him shoving a bagel and a bottle of orange juice in Bella's hand.

"Edward what's going?"

"The wolf pack...well what's left of it, are headed this way Bella."

I listened in as we moved from my bedroom downstairs to the living room. Emmett was already there, bouncing back and forth on his feet, punching the air.

"Finally a fight! This is what I've been waiting for since we got here." Rosalie rolled her eyes at Emmett and came over to mine and Bella's side.

"Do you want us to take Bella out of here? I souped up Emmett's truck two days ago so I should be able to get through the woods pretty fast unless you want to run her somewhere?"

"No, I have to stay so we can communicate. And yes Carlisle," I said turning back to him. "They did come here to attack. Their plan is to separate Bella and I from the rest of you, take me down and give Bella over to Victoria. Apparently she's gotten to a few more hikers that haven't been found yet."

"I haven't seen her because they are still chasing her. Damnnitt this is so frustrating! She could have been here the whole time! She could have gotten to you guys and I wouldn't have known because I can't see around those damn dogs!" Alice yelled. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. You guys are relying on me and I'm just letting you down."

I was about to reach out and console her when Bella dropped her food, ran to Alice and threw her arms around her neck. "Alice it's okay. It's not your fault so don't apologize. You do so much for us, for all of us. You never let us down, so don't think that. You've never let me down once. Even when you were gone...I know you sent me something on my birthday, I never got it...Charlie threw it out before I could see what it was but I knew you wouldn't forget. This is my fault... this is all my fault so please don't feel bad. If I wasn't such a danger magnet you'd have nothing to apologize for."

They hugged each other tightly, Alice whispering in Bella's ear that she has nothing to be sorry for either, that we all loved her, and that everything would be okay when the scent of wolf grew stronger. Sam's thoughts grew louder in my head. He was telling them to surround the house, to secure all the exits and to not let us pass by any means.

"Carlisle they've got the house surrounded, what should we do. If we rush out there, it'll look like it's us attacking them," Jasper said from the window.

"You're right. Okay...lets see." Carlisle ran his hand through his hair going over the different options before settling on one. One I knew Esme would protest to.

"Emmett, Jasper, you two stay up here and protect the girls. I will go outside...Edward you come with me to translate but stay in the house. Do not, and I repeat do not step outside that door!"

"Carlisle No!" Everyone said at the same time. Well everyone except for Emmett. His words were, and I quote "Fuck that!"

"I am the patriarch of this family. Most of you I created, therefore I am responsible for you lives. Now I don't care how old you all think you are, you aren't older than me...Now I said stay inside. You come out if I need you. Edward let's go...and to coin your phrase...for the love of all that's holy, do not defy me." He pictured Bella in his mind when he said this telling me that she would need me to protect her and I knew he was right...but he was my father...for as long as I could remember anyway and I wasn't going to let him walk into the lions or in this case the wolfs den without me.

I kissed Bella quickly, ignoring my family's grumbling thoughts to focus on where Sam was. He was at the back of the house, outside the kitchen door. I followed Carlisle and just as I was about to step outside he pushed me back, slamming the door in my face. Carlisle stood, composed, with his hands crossed over his chest staring down at Sam who was pacing back and forth in front of him.

"I'm sure that you can understand me when I speak to you, Sam I presume it is, but for my benefit my _**son**_ is inside and he will translate your thoughts for me." He looked over his shoulder through the window at me and nodded.

_You translate everything word for word, no paraphrasing. I don't want there to be any miscommunication. Is that clear?"_ I nodded and he turned back to Sam._ Good now does he understand what I said._

"Yes he does."_What are his thoughts?_

"I didn't come here to fight with you. I want your son and the girl. Hand them over and we'll leave. The rest of you will remain unharmed."

"I'm afraid that isn't going to happen Sam. I will not hand over my son or my daughter to you for any reason. Now...if you would like, I will look the other way and allow you to leave with the treaty still intact. There is no need to fight. If you will stop chasing after Victoria, my other daughter Alice will be able to see her. We will take care of our own kind."

I was amazed at calm Carlisle was. He thought of nothing but is carefully chosen words and of how he really didn't want to fight. He didn't want it on our conscience to have to kill any of them, and he also didn't want to take them away from their families. Especially the girl wolf.

"Is Bella one of you now?" I translated, shivering at the thought.

"No, Bella has not been changed but she is with Edward and that makes her part of my family. I also promised Charlie that I would protect her with my life, which I and my family are prepared to do. So I repeat, if you want to avoid any of you getting hurt, I will go back inside and you can leave. We can forget your violation of the treaty and go on as if none of this ever happened.

Sam continued to pace in front of Carlisle. He took a step closer and I ripped the door open ready to throw myself between them but Carlisle pushed me back and slammed it shut again, all without ever turning around.

"I know that you are a man of integrity Sam, so I would greatly appreciate it if you would take a few steps back from me. You're upsetting my son and as you've come here to kill him and his mate, I don't know how much longer I can hold him back. So step back."

Through Sam's eyes, I could see the menacing glare that Carlisle was giving him. It was the first time I had ever seen such and expression on his face but then again this was the first time he'd been face to face with such danger.

"He's saying If I'm so upset why don't I come out and fight like a man. Why did I send my daddy out to protect me, why don't I fight my own battles?" Carlisle actually laughed.

"Sam, you're being foolish and putting your pack and your people in grave danger. I'm giving you one last chance to turn around and leave."

"He is saying that it's past the point of return. Our being here attracts others to come and he wants us to leave. Victoria will not leave without killing Bella first so even if we left and took her with us, Victoria would pillage the town until he handed her over." The counter beside me crumpled into dust at my feet and it was only Jasper and Emmett's hold on me that kept me from flying out the door and ripping Sam's head off.

Carlisle shook his head angrily and then curled his hand over the banister of the porch. Venom was pooling in his mouth, his fingers curled as he prepared himself. The look on his normally gentle face sent trickles of fear into me but that was nothing to Sam's reaction. The hair was standing up on his back. He could see that Carlisle could use the banister as leverage to launch himself over and attack and because he was coming from above, Carlisle's agility would give him the advantage.

"As I said, we will handle this. All you need to do is stop chasing her and we will find her and deal with Victoria on own. Now turn around, take your family with you and leave mine alone."

"So you won't hand them over, he says. Carlisle, the rest of them are closing in on the house. I don't think we should just stand around.

_I don't either. Tell the girls to go upstairs. Tell Emmett and Jasper to be ready. _He turned back to Sam, shaking his head no. I heard his thoughts and spun on my heels, pushing past Emmett and Jasper and barreled into the living room just as the glass window shattered.

Bella screamed as Alice threw her to the floor, covering her and Jasper jumped in front of them, crouching between them and the oversized wolf that was standing in my living room. He snarled, curling his fingers ready to strike and barked at Alice for her to get the hell out of there. She didn't move. Instead she made eye contact with me and I shot over, grabbing Bella from underneath her and she spun around, crouching next to Jasper.

"Forget about it Jazz. I stay by your side and that's final."  
Esme grabbed Bella from my arms, flying towards the stairs. _Get that thing out of my living room please._

I had to laugh but not for long. One of the other wolves was launching a naked girl into my open bedroom window. I turned, dashing towards the stairs while Alice and Jasper pushed the wolf back from the window. I could smell the toxic smelling blood from Sam that Carlisle had drew when he smacked him away and part of me wanted to go and help him. Sam was the biggest and strongest of the wolves and Carlisle was fighting him alone, but my concern was for Bella and the naked chick that was running down my hallway about to phase.

Just as I got up the stairs, Esme pushed Bella into the first open doorway and braced herself to be hit by the girl that was phasing in mid air. I stepped in between them, knocking her back and she fell through my doorway crushing the bed. She jumped up, preparing to jump at me again when Rosalie appeared in the on the window ledge, grabbed her tale and pushed off the house sending both of them flying to the ground. Emmett saw this, and called out to her, stupidly turning his attention away and the wolf, Jared, jumped on his pack pinning him to the ground. I flew out there, knocking the wolf off him and both of three of us sprang on our feet all hissing and growling at each other.

"Get out of here Edward. Go protect Mom and Bella. I got this!" And then he charged at Jared, taking him down from the legs. The wolf howled, bucking his leg and sending Emmett flying off but he land on his feet and charged back.

"Go!" he yelled throwing his shoulder into Jared's. I could hear bone cracking...both of theirs and Emmett yelled "fuck" rolling over the wolfs back.

As I launched myself back into the house I caught a glimpse of Rosalie ducking underneath the mouth of Leah. It was a close one. She could have lost her head, but she was a little faster. She grabbed one of the Leah's arms, squeezed and twisted so that it broke and then used the other arm to swing herself around and pushed Leah over onto her side.

Esme was locked in her bedroom with Bella. I had to give the door a good shouldering to bust it open. Bella screamed and then launched herself into my arms when she saw me.

"Edward what the hell is going on out there."

"Sam wants to kill me and hand you over to Victoria, Bella. Esme, I want you to get Bella out of here. I don't care how you do it, take whatever car is fastest and get Bella out of here while we deal with this."

"Where is Carlisle?" she asked me grabbing Bella's hand. Blinking I focused in on Carlisle thoughts. We was dancing around Sam, not really hitting him, just repeatedly knocking him back and trying not to hurt him all the while telling him to call off his pack, that he didn't want anyone to get hurt.

"Edward, no. I'm not leaving here without you. Forget it. I'm staying here."  
"Bella, please. I can't be in two places at once. I can't stay here and protect you while Carlisle is out there fighting Sam alone."

"Edward no. We're not separating. I'm not leaving. I'll call Jacob then. He said the wolves can attack each other. If I stand behind him I won't get hurt."

I am a man. I sometimes think very manly things. And the thought of some other man protecting my girlfriend...is just absurd.

"The hell you will," I barked and grabbed her arm. I marched her out of the room and into Alice's and pushed her into the bathroom. It was the only room with no windows and it was right in the middle of the house. They'd have to break through the walls to get to her. "You stay right here and do not come out until I get you are you clear with me Bella?" She nodded, and I smelled faint hints of her arousal mixed in with her fear. If I had any testosterone, it was definitely pumping at the moment.

Esme came up besides pushing me out of the room. "Go help your father Edward, I'll keep her safe. I won't let anyone or anything near her."

I kissed them both and flew down the back stairs. Jasper and Alice both had Paul pinned to the ground, holding him while he howled and fought to get free. Rosalie was fine, wearing out Leah. Her shirt was torn in the front and from her thoughts, I knew she had taken a swipe but it had barely broken skin, and Emmett was fighting to keep Jared back long enough to set is arm to heal.

Carlisle was the one I was most concerned about. He had gotten knocked down twice and was only on the defensive, only striking at Sam to prevent himself from hurt and never hard enough to injure.

I on the other hand was not going to play so nice.

I flew at Sam, knocking him to the ground just as he was flying at Carlisle again.

"You wanted to fight me Sam. Well here I am." I said landing a punch right in his face. Sam howled, throwing his body weight up to knock me off but since I already knew this, I jumped off, landing on my feet. Sam sprang, rushing right at me and Carlisle and we separated so that he ended up running between us. He spun around, charging at me and I moved again so that he flew head first towards a tree. I didn't wait for him to turn around. I launched myself into the air landing on his back, ready to sink my teeth into him and suffer the consequences later when he heaved himself backwards and threw his massive body on top of mine. My head landed on a rock, it felt like it shattered into a thousand pieces. I groaned, lying there, as Carlisle pulled the wolf off of me. I heard another bone snap and Sam cursing Carlisle in his head.

"Edward are you okay?" He said looking down at me. He was crouched in front of me ready to attack and I slid from behind him, actually feeling dizzy.

"Yea I'm fine" I lied, reaching up to make sure my head was still in one piece.

Sam rushed at us again, Carlisle preparing to knock him back again from the front, but this time Sam jumped up, coming down at us. I pulled Carlisle out of the way, just as Sam landed right where he would have been. Sam's teeth clamped around my out stretched arm and I felt the pull as he was about to rip it off my body, but with my right hand I punched him hard, sending him flying off me...thankfully without my arm. I wasted no time baring my teeth and ran at him to deal the death blow.

Carlisle yelled at me to stop but I ignored him and moments later wished I hadn't. My teeth sank into Sam's neck and his blood gushed past my lips tasting of acid.

He let out such a painful cry that all around me I everyone stopped what they were doing. The wolves all broke free and were rushing at me, howling and crying out, feeling Sam's pain as if my teeth were in _them_.

Sam's blood continued to gush into my mouth even though I wasn't trying to drink it and my vision started to get blurry. I tried to pull away but I was frozen, my teeth stuck in the back of Sam's neck. I could hear voices, all of them yelling, but everything sounded like I was underwater. My senses started to deaden and my body was growing weaker by the second. This must be what it feels like to die.

"Bella I love you," I said out loud and then everything faded to black.

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**A/N Ahhhh What's wrong with Edward!!!!!!!! Is he going to be okay...oh know...I'm so frightened!**

**Well I'm not but you should be...anyways I hope you enjoyed that chapter!**

**Be sure to check out my new story, Another Heart Calls.**

**Who's seen the Runaways? I have, Kristen did and amazing job...oh my word!**

**And finally, Now starts the voting on whether or not the squeal with be w/or without Renesmee...I will accept your votes via review or private message so let me know what you want people... let me know.**

**P.s. Please review!  
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	48. No Sound but The Wind

**A/N So I know its been quite some time since I updated. The last chapter I posted I was really proud of and worked very hard on and it seemed to me that although many people have read it, no one had anything constructive to say even when I put in the fact that I was holding a vote to see whether or not I should add a pregnancy into the sequel. As an aspiring writer, I can tell you that this was VERY discouraging. It sent me head on into the worst writer's block I have ever had. It was so bad, that I even considered quitting and not finishing this story. But after much encouragement to continue I've been able to fight through it and am now happy to say that I can write again. **

**Though this story is almost at its end, I do intend to do a sequel and continue my writing and anyone who enjoys my work I would greatly appreciate your continued support. So here is the next long awaited chapter. I hope that you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. **

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****No Sound but The Wind**

**BPoV**

Hearts don't just break. Sometimes they crumble. My heart… was shattering as I walked slowly down the hall towards Edward's bedroom.

"Alice…how…how bad is he?" My voice came out in a cracking whisper, my feet tripping over themselves on their own volition as if my body were trying to protect my heart from being completely and utterly broken.

Alice glanced at me from over her shoulder smiling that forced smile she does when she's keeping something from me. "Wolf's blood is poisonous to us Bella. It paralyzes us so that the others can attack. Leah….she's fast and she got past us but Rosalie pulled her off before she could do any real damage. He's not that bad, just don't jostle him too much." She pulled at my hand impatiently, urging me forward. "He's asking for you Bella. Come on."

The hours after the fight were agonizing for me. I had seen rather than heard Esme say Edward's name and rush out of the bathroom. I tried to follow her but was stopped before I got downstairs by Rosalie telling me to go back up, that it wasn't safe for me yet. I waited alone for hours in Alice's bedroom in pure agony, cringing when I heard Edward's cries of pain doubling over myself every time. I heard Leah shrieking downstairs that they were hurting Sam and Emmett screaming at her in his booming voice that she should shut up and be happy that Carlisle was trying to save him at all.

Alice pushed Edward's door open slowly and I could see that even though it was high afternoon the room was pitch black. Someone had draped dark sheets over all the windows blocking out all the sunlight. All I could see over her shoulder was his outline on the bed, his pallid skin glowing faintly in the darkness.

"Oh my God! Edward!" I cried launching myself towards the bed but Alice drew me back.

"Careful Bella, careful," She whispered in my ear. I crawled on the bed slowly, as carefully as I had ever done anything in my life up to his side. Tears welled in my eyes as I ran my hand slowly over his body not feeling any movement from him at all.

"Bella," he breathed out turning slowly to face me. I gasped when he opened his eyes falling backwards. His eyes were red, as red as James's were and I could see the venom glistening on his lips.

"Edward…are you okay?" I croaked out leaning towards his upraised hand. Edward curled his fingers into my hair and pulled my face closer so that his forehead rested against my shoulder.

"I thought I was going to die Bella, I thought I was never going to see you, smell you, touch you ever again." My body was suddenly jerked backwards; Alice had pulled me off the bed and flipped me behind her.

"Alice what are you doing?!" I screamed trying to push past her.

"Making sure Edward doesn't make any mistakes. Just relax and lay down Edward…God knows you need your…"

But Edward was already up, shaky on his feet walking around the bed slowly. I felt a vice tightening on my heart watching him and reached out but Alice stepped in between us and grabbed his hands easing him to the floor.

"I need to hold her Alice; you have no idea what it was like. Just let me hold her. You know what's coming…please just let me have my last moments with her in peace."

"You are so stubborn Edward. Why can't you just listen to me…why can't you just let us help you?"

He shook his head weakly. He was barely able to sit up straight and ended up leaning against the bed reaching for me. Alice stepped from in between us and I sank to the floor beside him pulling me into my arms. He wrapped his arms around my waist and buried his face into my chest. I held him for a moment trying to sort things out in my head, trying to figure out what they were talking about when suddenly he pushed me away, tossing his body back against the floor.

"Alice, don't do that to me."

"Edward, you can't fight them like this. You won't last a second. We can find a way to make it work, no one will judge you I swear."

"I already said no. The consequences are not worth it."

"You're being an idiot Edward. You're going to be separated either way…this way you'll have a better chance of coming back to her."

"I already told you no. Now get out and leave us in peace."

I stared at Alice's face for a moment. The light from the hallway windows was enough for me to see that she was angry and for the first time since I met her she truly looked scared.

"Alice, what's going on? Who's coming here?" My eyes shot between her and the door just as Carlisle stepped in.

"Everyone downstairs now. Family meeting."

Edward moved slowly from my lap, pushing off the bed to get up. Alice was by his side within seconds, linking his arm around her neck and putting hers around his waist. I stood to help her but she stopped me.

"Bella let me. You'll get hurt if you try to support him on the stairs."

Silent tears fell from my eyes watching them wobble out of the door. Carlisle grimaced taking Edward's weight from Alice and ushering us through the door. Everyone was seated around the living room all wearing worried faces. Alice slipped into Jasper's lap as we passed him and Carlisle eased Edward onto the couch next to Esme motioning for me to sit. I pulled Edward's hand into my lap noticing for the first time that he felt slightly warmer than he usually did.

"I already know what you're going to say Carlisle. You know I won't do it so why are you trying to bother." Edward rested his head against the back of the couch at Carlisle who was standing in the middle of the room. He rolled his eyes and turned to look at everyone individually.

"Bella," he said turning to me, "Some of the Volturi are coming here…they're not far off if I'm correct." He glanced over his shoulder at Alice who nodded in confirmation. Edward cringed beside me and wrapped his arms around me pulling me into his lap. I took a moment to run my fingers through his hair and kissed the top of his head. I knew what this meant; no one needed to tell me.

"Since Alice cannot see what is going to happen anyone that would like to may leave now." The room was so quiet that even I could have heard a pin drop.

"Why…why can't Alice see?" I finally asked when it was clear no one was going to move.

"Sam is still here Bella. He's still in the garage. Carlisle is trying to dilute my venom with his blood by using all the bags we had used stored here for you." I shook for a moment half because the reason Edward was so weak was having his life so conveniently saved and the other half because they thought they needed to store blood for me…was I that clumsy or did they anticipate another "accident" occurring…one they wanted to keep off record?

"Which is why Bella, I need to ask you for something," Edward tightened his grip around me and glared at Carlisle so hatefully that I was surprised he didn't get smacked.

"Forget it Carlisle. Don't even put that thought into her head."

"What thought? What do you need?"

"Your blood," Esme said quickly. She reached out for my hand and held it between hers staring into my eyes. I could see the guilt shining in them, as if what they were asking me for I wouldn't gladly give if it meant saving Edward's life.

"Did you really think you had to ask? Did you think I would say no?" I asked incredulously looking around the room.

"No Bella, we knew you wouldn't say no. We needed the stubborn mule you're sitting on to hear you say it," Alice hissed in his direction.

I turned to him, my eyes bulging out of my head in shock and looked at the stubborn expression on his face itching to smack him myself. I jumped off his lap, moving to stand beside Carlisle and glared at him just as angrily as he was looking at everyone else.

"Bella don't start. I don't have the strength to fight with you."

"Exactly their point Edward. Look at you, you can barely sit up. Stop being stubborn and just take it, God."

"Bella you don't know what you're asking me to do…My thirst is too strong right now…one drop and I may not be able to control myself. What if Carlisle doesn't take enough from you and I need more…I could end up attacking you…do you think I want to put you through that?"

"Edward I'm not afraid of you…I'm afraid for you…so just stop being so stubborn and please…just for once listen to someone else…you promised me you would trust me…listen to me more often…listen to me now…just take it please." By this time I was crying. I knew that if Carlisle was pushing the issue so hard, if he didn't something terribly bad would happen.

"Alice, is he going to hurt me…can you see if he's going to hurt me?" I asked turning to her. She shook her head no. "With Sam in the garage I can't see anything. The only reason I saw the Volturi coming was because I was far enough away from the house trying to find something to bring home for Edward. We don't have time for me to go far enough away, look, and then come back. You have to do this now Edward."

Her eyes flickers up to the clock then back at him. Their eyes locked for a moment and then she smiled sadly and climbed from Jasper's lap. She came next to me and took my hand pulling me towards him. I knelt in front of him, staring into his eyes through my tears. He wouldn't look me in the face, I could see his indecision wavering…Edward wasn't stupid…he knew what he needed to do. I reached up grabbing his face forcing him to look at me. I pulled him down so that our foreheads touched...tried to get him to focus on me and me alone.

"Edward…I love you….I love you…please do it for me. If this is all I can do…all I can do to save you…all I can do to protect you then please let me…let me give this to you."

"Bella…I can't. I'm scared of hurting you."

"And I'm scared of losing you."

Our eyes locked for a moment before he sighed heavily and I felt his icy breath wash over my face in a way that I never felt before. I was instantly stunned…unable to move or think or react. All I could hear were footsteps coming closer…no…leaving the room and my body being pushed back against the floor. Yet I wasn't afraid…I felt strangely at ease. I knew what was coming…what would happen…what could happen but I didn't care. All I could think about was someone hurting him anymore than he already was and any pain that I was about to feel wouldn't compare to the pain of losing him.

"Bella…I'm sorry." I felt him kneeling over me, his weight almost too much for me to bear. His hand ran slowly up my side and I quivered beneath him feeling slightly turned on.

"Don't worry Edward. We wont let you hurt her," I heard Alice say. She knelt at my side pulling my arm up. Edward gently took my wrist from her and kissed it right on the spot where Tanya had bit me. I waited for the pain of his bite but instead a flash of silver came into my peripheral. Edward lifted my arm and I felt Carlisle's familiar gentle hands take it, the pressure of a surgical knife against my skin, and the searing pain as the blade sliced through it.

Edward moaned loudly once my blood started to flow. He shifted his weight off of me and pressed his lips to my wrist. His cold lips eased the burning sensation from the cut and I felt him pull hard drawing my blood out faster. My body started to grow weaker as his grip on me tightened. I looked up at him, his eyes were closed and as he continued to drink from me I could see him growing stronger.

"Edward…enough…let her rest for a moment." Carlisle attempted to pull him away but Edward shrugged from beneath his touch, leaning more towards me.

"Edward…I said that's enough. Let her go."

But he didn't. He pulled hard on my veins, so hard the sudden rush of blood made my eyes cross and my back arch up from the floor. I could feel his body being jerked backwards but he pulled me up with him still drinking. I gasped when I realized that I was losing consciousness, the picture in front of me beginning to fade away but then I felt his icy tongue dance across my wound closing it. Alice squeezed in between us pushing a straw between my lips just as Edward was kneeling away, wiping my blood from the corner of his mouth, then licking the back of his hand.

"Are you okay Bella?" His voice sounded… different… he reached for me but Alice moved in between us so that he ended up hitting her back.

"Tired…I'm tired," I said softly.

"I know Bella, I know." Alice wrapped her arms around my waist pulling me to my feet. I stumbled forward but Edward caught me pulling my body flush with his.

"Thank you Bella. Thank you so much for trusting me. I….I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No," I said into his chest. I felt like I was about to pass out and leaned into him.

"I'm going to take her upstairs." Alice glared at him reaching for me but he jerked me from within her reach. "I won't…I'm okay Alice. Stop looking at me like that. I'm just going to take her upstairs to lie down. You heard Carlisle. She needs to rest."

Seconds later my head hit the softness of my pillow. I was still too drained to move on my own but when I felt Edward slide up behind me I used all the strength I had to push back against him.

"Emmett is on the other side of our door waiting to pull me away if I try something so you don't have to worry."

"I'm not worried Edward. I know you won't hurt me. Are you…are you better?"

"I'm stronger but not better. I would have had to kill you if I wanted all of my strength back."

He laughed darkly and buried his face in the crook of my neck and pulled my arm up so that I could tangle my fingers in his hair. "I took too much from you and I'm sorry for that…but I want you to know that in the back of my mind I held your words…your love and your trust for me…It was the only reason I could force myself to stop…but I can't…I can't ever do that again Bella…Every time I taste your blood my body craves it more. My thirst for you right now….It's almost unbearable...if I didn't love you so much you'd be dead…do you understand… do you understand why I was so afraid now?"

I nodded rolling over to face him and he kissed my forehead before running his icy lips down the side of my face to my mouth. I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling myself into his kiss. He moaned softly into my mouth pulling me closer to him and hitched my leg around his waist. He kissed me hungrily as if it was the last kiss we would ever share. I fought through my languidness to kiss him back with as much ardor, sighing as he rolled over onto his back pulling me on top of him. His hands crept gently up my back underneath my shirt as his lips moving from my mouth to my neck.

"Bella," he whispered into my skin, sending chills down my spine, "Marry me."

For a moment I couldn't believe I was hearing him correctly and pulled away looking down into his face. He realized I was looking into his eyes and closed them probably thinking their coloring was what had me speechless.

"What…did you say?"

"I said marry me Bella. When this is over and if we survive I want you to marry me. I want you to be my wife."

"Is this what you've been trying to ask me all this time you've been walking around acting like a weirdo?" He ran his fingers through his hair and looked away embarrassed, nodding. "Yeah, kind of…I just didn't know how to ask you. I wanted it to be perfect. You deserve that but now it looks like we don't have enough time to make a big to do about it."

I felt my heart swelling out of happiness but couldn't formulate the word yes on my tongue. Instead, I grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled myself up eye level to him, knowing he would be able to read my eyes and pressed my lips to his so earnestly that even if he couldn't hear me screaming yes in my head, he'd be able to taste it on my tongue.

He kissed me back forcing me to be gentler and curled his fingers into my hair and pulled my head back so he could look at me.

"I'll take that as a very enthusiastic yes," He chuckled and kissed the tip of my nose.

"Yes, yes a thousand times yes," I said kissing him again.

In that moment, I felt something shift in my heart as I looked into Edward's crimson eyes. He was no longer just my "boyfriend" he was now something more. Even just looking at him now, he appeared different to me and it wasn't just the color of his eyes or the rosy flush of his skin, but just the way my eyes held him now. As if I weren't sure I would die without him before, now I knew it in the very depth of my bones. I leaned forward cradling his head pressing my hands on either sides of his face and kissed him gently before the passion between us started to take over.

He flipped me underneath him pressing his body against mine and I wrapped myself around him eager to close any space that may have been between us. I felt his kisses move lower and in the back of my mind was aware of the snickering of the other side of the door.

"Do you really want to do this with Emmett standing on the other side of the door?" I whispered breathlessly into his ear.

"Don't stop on my account. Act like I'm not even here. This is better than Skinemax," Emmett chuckled from the other side of the door and Edward picked something up from the side table and threw it in his direction.

"We're not doing anything so shut up and go away. I don't need you standing like a guard dog outside of my door," Edward barked.

"Yeah you say that now but don't come crying to me when you rip her head off," Emmett mumbled.

In a flash, Edward disappeared from on top of me and appeared across the room ripping the door off the hinges and punching Emmett right in the face. "Don't ever joke like that again, you asshole!" Edward screamed and then threw the door at him. "And thanks for ruining my perfect moment!"

He flashed back to my side pulling me into his arms again, apologizing for Emmett.

"You should know by now that I'm used to Emmett's stupid jokes."

"My jokes aren't stupid Bella, your human brain just can't wrap around the hilarity of them and you can thank me later but right now we've gotta go and get those mutts the hell outta this house before the fuzz gets here."

"I'm sure you can handle this thing without me besides I hardly doubt that Sam and I should be in the same room at this point. I can't promise that I'm not going to get pissed off just looking at him and finish what I started."

"You should drink Bella's blood more often; I like you a lot better when you're not mopping around like a chick on her period."

They both laughed as Emmett turned away and went downstairs. Edward turned back to me pulling my head to his shoulder and wrapped his arms around me.

"How much time do we have before they get here Edward?" He was silent for a moment, his ear perked up towards the window.

"A little over an hour I would say before I have to go out there. I'm going to try to keep them from getting anywhere near you and since they are probably here for me anyway, I'm going to meet them…trying to keep them as far away from you as possible."

I sprang up out of his arms quickly, so quickly that due to my loss of blood I feigned backwards before he pulled me upright. "You're not leaving me…I mean, we're not separating. If you want to keep them away from the house, away from the family, then I'll go with you. If they're coming after you, then they'll come after me too. There's no reason to drag the rest of the family into this if we don't have to."

"Bella I can't let you do that."

"Edward, I'm not just your girlfriend anymore, I'm going to be your wife. And as your wife, you need to see me as your equal even if as a human I'm not nearly as strong or smart as you…I do love the way you do and you know that. I would do anything to protect them just like you would so I'm telling you that if you go out there alone I'm going with you."

"They're never going to let us past the front door."

"So we'll use the window. We're good at that." He smiled sweetly at me drawing me in for another kiss before I heard him inhale. I knew what he was about to do and pulled back quickly before he could exhale over my face.

"Don't even try it. I'm putting my foot down."

"Putting your foot down on what? You're sitting on the bed." He laughed reaching for me as I scrambled off of the bed onto the floor and stomped my foot.

"There, you see? My foot is down and it might as well be gorilla glued because there's no changing my mind." I could see a flash of anger in Edward's eyes but put my hands on my hips and held my ground.

"I don't think I've ever met anyone as stubborn as myself before and then there was you," He said shaking his head and smiling wryly. "If this is what you want Bella, if this is what you really want to do, then all I can say is thank you. Thank you for loving my family enough to put your life on the line for them."

"They've done it for me enough times that I think I owe it to them to at least try."

Edward came to my side and took my hand leading me towards the window.

"You don't owe them anything. Everything they've done, they've done because they love you too."

He pulled back the sheet over the broken glass and pulled me in for one last kiss before tossing me onto his back and jumping to the ground below.

"Hold on tight," He said tightening his grip around my legs. "If I say shut your eyes…if I say look away…bury your face in my shoulder…think of a birthday. Alice knows we're up to something so I have to run fast…faster than I have ever ran with you before."

I nodded burying my face into his shoulder and bracing myself for the breath to be knocked out of me. I kissed his neck gently as was our sign that I was ready to go. There was no sound but the wind in my ears as Edward shot off into the trees like a bullet from a gun towards what could have been our tragic end.

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**A/N In true Midori fashion, I have left you with one hell of a cliffhanger. **

**Review if you like (I would appreciate it). Also the vote for the pregnancy in the sequel is still open, I really want to know what you guys want to see happen. While I'm continuing to write this story for my own satisfaction, I'm also doing this for my readers who have stuck with me from the beginning. **

**A special thanks goes out to my Beta Tree G. for talking me through my darkest time with her wonderful words of encouragement and the numerous verbal kicks in the ass. Also thanks to my cousin who even though we hadn't talked to each other in over 10 years, read my story in two full days and ever since an avid reader and constant source of encouragement for me. **

**Also to a fellow writer Content1 who after seeing that I hadn't posted in awhile, messaged to check on me. It was a sweetest thing an almost stranger has ever done. Be sure to check out her stories, she is an amazing writer. **

**And finally, thanks to my devoted readers - you keep reading and I'll keep writing. :)  
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	49. Walking With a Ghost

**A/N Hello my lovely readers. I'm gonna keep this short and sweet**. **Enjoy this next installment because I LOVED writing it. **

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**Walking With a Ghost**

**EPOV**

Bella seemed lighter as I carried her on my back through the woods. It could have been my imagination or the fact that I have never felt so strong in all of my existence. I felt stronger than I had as a newborn even. Bella's ambrosial blood coursed through my body strengthening every muscle…every tendon…every bone.

"I'm surprised they haven't caught up with us yet," Bella whispered in my ear. I reached up covering her hand with mine; she seemed colder than usual.

"They probably haven't noticed yet with all those mutts in the house. They're a bit preoccupied. They probably think we are still in our room." She sniffled and then began shivering. I pulled her off my back and placed her feet on the ground next to me.

"Are you shivering because you're cold or because you're scared? We have time to go back. We could get you a jacket or leave the country maybe?" I asked her and she laughed.

"No Edward, I'm fine. It's just a little cold here. Let's just keep going." Bella tugged at my hand and continued walking. It seemed as though she already knew where we were going and I didn't have to lead her.

The wind began to blow hard even in the middle of the forest. Swirls of leaves danced around us in the wind and I pulled Bella close to my side even though I knew it would only make her colder. I had the sudden urge to hold her in my arms…to kiss her. For all I knew it could have been the last time and I wanted to savor every one of my last moments with her. We stopped walking and time seemed to stand still around us as we embraced each other. Bella placed her hands flat on my chest leaning up on her toes and kissed me gently. I could feel my eyes burning, feel that I was going to cry again but I didn't know why. We would be okay. We had to be okay. We had gone through too much to not be okay and didn't seem fair for things to not work out in our favor. I had a plan, albeit it wasn't a very good one, it was still a plan nonetheless.

Bella's soft lips moved over mine as we kissed oblivious to all that was around us. I clutched her to me out of pure need. For once, I wasn't cautious as to how I held her, though she didn't make a sound other than a sigh here, a breathy moan there as my lips traveled across her skin.

"Edward, are you afraid?" She asked with her face buried in my chest.

"No Bella, I'm not. I promise to protect you. I promise to get you out of this alive even if it's the last thing I do."

"Hmph."

I didn't have time to ask her what she meant. The thoughts of the Volturi were coming on louder…faster than they have before.

_It seems as though we don't have much farther to go. I can smell her from here. Faster. Come. My throat is burning with need. I don't believe I've ever felt this thirsty. I can't wait to see if Isabella tastes as good as she smells _came Aro's thoughts resonating in my mind like gunfire. I growled instinctively holding Bella protectively behind me as I had done too many times before.

"We don't need to go any farther," I snarled, "they're coming to us." Venom flowed from my mouth profusely as I snarled and snapped in the direction of their thoughts trying to reign in my anger. Bella wrapped her arms around me pressing her body against me. I felt her slight warmth and began to calm down.

"Edward you need to relax. I don't think attacking them right away is the smart thing to do. Maybe we can reason with them, make a deal of some sort."

Bella's hold on me felt feeble, a reminder that I had drank too much of her blood.

"You're weak," I said spinning in her arms, "I should have left you home. Let me take you back, I might still have time."

"I resent that. I'm not weak. I'm still here, aren't I?"

"You're right. You are. And I love you and don't know what I would do without you." I leaned down brushing my lips across hers gently and she giggled holding on to my wrist and pulled away.

"I don't know. Go crazy maybe?" She teased.

I admired Bella's ability to make a joke at a time like this. I had always been too serious…never able to find the silver lining in anything or find humor in any serious situation. Bella was the gift that changed that for me. I now knew that I could handle anything as long as she was by my side.

"I love you future Mrs. Isabella Marie Cullen," I said taking her into my arms and burying my face into her hair. As I was closing my eyes to soak in my last moments with her before "the fuzz" came, I saw her reaching her arms up to put them around my neck, but once they were closed I felt nothing.

"Bella, you're so weak. Let me take you back to the house."

"Edward, open your eyes. Look at me. Edward, can you hear me?"

"Alice, what are you doing here? Go back to the house. Bella and I have decided to do this on our own."

"Oh Edward…," and then I felt her hands on my chest and back. She was pushing me towards the ground. I opened my eyes realizing that Bella was no longer in front of me. My eyes quickly scanned the area. Each of my family members stood, looming over me with solemn looks on their faces.

"What? What is it? Where is Bella?" I asked rapidly suddenly panicked. "She was here just a second ago." My eyes began burning more as fiery tears fell from them.

"No Edward, she -" Rosalie started but Alice held up her hand stopping her.

"No Rosalie, let me. He obviously doesn't realize." And then she turned to Emmett and Jasper holding out her hand. "Guys, we only have a moment. Could you help me hold him down?"

This couldn't be good. The two of them nodded and came over kneeling at my side. Each of them grabbed an arm and pinned me to the ground as Alice moved in front of me and took my face between her hands.

"Allie, what's going on? Where is Bella?" I asked staring into her glossy eyes. I could still taste Bella's blood in my mouth mixed in with my venom. The front of Alice's shirt was torn and smelled faintly of me.

"Edward I need you to listen to me, OK?"

"I'm listening. Now tell me where Bella is!"

"Bella is at the house Edward. We need you to come home."

"You left her alone? How could you be so daft? The Volturi's coming…they'll be here in any minute and the wolves…they could…"

"Edward!" Alice yelled shaking my head and cutting me off. "Edward you were right. We should have listened to you and we're sorry for pushing you. I'm sorry…I couldn't see because of Sam and I thought if anything happened, we could help you. But we couldn't and I'm sorry. We're all so sorry."

"Alice what are you trying to tell me?" I said through gritted teeth.

"Bella," she sobbed and threw herself around my neck, whispering in my ear, "is dead."

"Alice this is not the time for jokes and that is not in the least bit funny. Where is she?"

Everybody's thoughts came rushing at me all at once. Images of me with Bella's limp body in my arms flashed in everyone's mind. My eyes burning red, my teeth sunk deep into Bella's throat as she thrashed beneath me. Emmett trying to pull me off and being pushed back by my newfound strength. Jasper using all his power to calm me enough for Carlisle to pull Bella's body away. Me attacking Alice as she tried to tear Bella away from my arms. Bella's face cold and lifeless as she used the last of her strength to reach up and stroke my face, staring at me with her dead eyes and whispering _Its OK, I love you._

The sound that reverberated throughout the trees sounded neither human nor vampire. It sounded more like a demon screeching after having a gallon of holy water poured on it and John Constantine pressing a golden crucifix into his forehead and blowing Newport smoke into its face all while Keanu Reeves is hovering in the background saying "Dude".

"Carlisle change her. Please, go back and change her."

"Son I'm afraid I can't. Trust me, I tried and it's too late. Bella is dead, son. She's gone."

I felt as if I was a black hole and the very existence of everything was sinking in on me. I fell face forward into the ground as my chest heaved with unnecessary breaths.

"No! No!" I panted out. "This can't be happening. I wouldn't have…I wouldn't have done that to her...I wouldn't have. I love her. I love her!" And then I screamed again repeatedly bashing my face into the ground. I was hoping it would break and when it pieced back together this would all be some toxic wolf-blood induced fever dream.

"Carlisle? Is he…is your fledgling OK?" Aro's voice came from behind me.

"He's mad as a box of frogs," Marcus said after him.

Carlisle stepped in front of me while Emmett and Jasper snatched me up from the ground. My legs felt like Jell-O despite Bella's sweet blood coursing through my body.

Bella…

I screamed again. Everyone ducked and covered their ears.

"OK, you've got to shut him up," Aro said sternly and Emmett came over and wrapping me in a bear hug and clamped his paw over my mouth.

"Aro, we're kind of dealing with something right now. Could you give us a minute? Maybe just come back tomorrow?" Carlisle asked calmly and Aro smirked.

"Hello? Volturi here? We don't make appointments. We don't work on your time, you work on ours."

"Listen! We already know why you're here but Bella is already dead. Here, see?" Carlisle stepped over Alice, who was still sitting on the ground and placed his hands in Aro's.

"Hmm…I see. Bella is dead after all. Looks like you've made a little bit of a whoopsie there now didn't you, Edward?" Pictures of Carlisle's thoughts replayed in Aro's head and I thrashed painfully in Emmett's bear trap trying to get away. I needed to get away. I needed to see for myself that it wasn't true. But then Aro showed me Bella's cold eyes again and I knew then that they weren't mistaken.

"Stop antagonizing my boy!" Carlisle spat at Aro and Emmett added, "Yeah you fuckstick! Can't you see what it's done to him? I highly doubt that you could think of any worse punishment."

Aro bent over laughing at me, at my pain, at Bella being dead. I was fueled with rage and broke free of Emmett's grasp probably breaking one of his arms and launched into the air, fangs and claws bared directly at Aro. Demetri and Felix caught me mid-air and dragged me to the ground at Aro's feet. His eyes looked over me in disgust but I felt a strange warmth and saw Bella knelling before me. Alive. Happy. Smiling. She kissed me and whispered _we're going home Edward_. _Heaven,_ I whispered.

Aro shouted, "**KILL HIM!"

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**A/N *Cricket* *Cricket* *Bust out laughing...falls on floor...bangs head...laughs harder...sits up holding forehead..."umm, oww"***

**Ok OK guys, calm down. Put down the pitch forks and torches. It was just a joke that me and my crazy Beta thought up because we have nothing better to do with our time than think of ways to torment people. This is so not how my story ends so don't be mad at me. The real next chapter will be up tomorrow. You have my scouts honor and yes I was a girls scout for like, 2 days. But don't tell anybody or Edward will kill you. **


	50. Torch Song

**A/N Okay so i know its late but i had to write this like 5 frigging times...I wanted it to come out right and kept thinking of new things to add and take out...so i hope the finished product is pleading to you all...Do enjoy!**

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**Torch Song**

**EPoV**

Bella seemed lighter as I carried her. It could have been my imagination or the fact that her blood was coursing through my body making me feel stronger than I ever had, even as a newborn.

"I'm surprised they haven't figure out we're gone yet," Bella said. Her voiced sounded strained, a reminder that I had drank too much of her blood and not given her enough time to recuperate.

"You're weak. Maybe I should take you back."

"I resent that Edward. I am not weak. I've survived a savage vampire beating, venom in my veins, you drinking my blood, not to mention the-

"I didn't mean it that way Bella," I said cutting her off and placing her on her feet. She looked up into my eyes, steadying herself on my arms. "Bella you're the strongest person I know. Any one else would have running for the hills by now, but you…you just persevere…I admire that about you. I was ready to give up when you weren't…I was ready to run-

"Save it for your wedding vows Edward. I don't have the strength to start crying now." She smiled a gentle smile, letting me know she was just teasing me and I leaned down kissing her softly on the lips. I could smell the beginnings of a bruise from the weight of my arms rising on her skin. I needed to remember to be more careful with her. Especially now that…

I froze pulling Bella behind me, and backing her into a tree.

"Edward what is it?" she squeaked gripping the sides of my shirt until her knuckles turned white.

"Victoria," I snarled as venom dripped from my teeth. I could hear her thoughts. She knew we were alone. She was close. A blur of red flashed across my line of sight, I hadn't realized she was going to be so fast.

"Maybe we should call Alice?" Bella chirped behind me. She shoved her hand in my front pockets fishing around for my phone and grabbed me instead.

"Bella, that is not my phone. I don't have it."

"Oh for Pete's sake Edward. Of all the times to not be prepared and for you to have that-

"Not now Bella!"

The blur of red flashed in front of me. She was tiny like Alice with small delicate hands that were curled into vicious cat claws. Her lips were curled back over her teeth and I could smell her venom –apples- pooling in her mouth.

"You!" she snarled at me. "You killed him! You killed my James!" Victoria screeched at me.

"In my defense," I began, " I didn't know he was your James at the time. He didn't think about you-

"Lair!" she screamed hurling herself at me. I knocked her back. Carlisle wanted me to try to reason with her first…I wish he could have seen what I was dealing with. He maybe wouldn't have felt that way. Victoria started to pace back and forth in front of me. Her mind was working through all the scenarios she could think of to pry me away from Bella.

"None of that will work Victoria. I'll know everything you're planning to do before you do it, plus I'm faster and stronger than you are. You'll never touch a hair on her head."

Victoria cried out in frustration shrilly, her voice carrying throughout the trees. Bella reached up and covered her ears just as I grabbed her, stepping out of the way as Victoria charged at us. She ended scaling the tree and I sped behind it using minimal force to knock it over. She jumped off at the last second, right before it slammed to the ground in front of us.

"Bella, stay back." I said under my breath to her. She turned, and ran crouching as far away from me as possible but still staying in my sight. Victoria was back in front of me in the blink of an eye but just a moment too slow. She took a swipe at me, but I grabbed her arm and twisted it behind her back before she could touch me. She screamed reaching with her other hand to swipe at my face but I grabbed that hand too. I pinned them both behind her back then as gently as possible pinned her to the ground. She stop resisting, knowing that she wasn't going to able to break my hold no matter how hard she tried. She had seen my eyes, smelled Bella on my breath…she knew what I had done.

And that's when I heard them. They were 3 miles away and gaining speed through the trees.

"Listen to me," I said low in her ear, "I don't want to hurt you. I know why you're mad and I'm sorry for what I had to do. But he was after my mate and I had to protect her." Victoria let out a wail as the thought of James laughing when he left saying that he'd be right back, he was just going out for milk, flashed through her mind. From her thoughts I could tell how much she loved him and felt bad. Tanya had ruined yet another life.

"The Volturi are on their way here. Do you know who they are?" She nodded and began struggling again. We were having the same thought. One touch and they would know she had killed within the walls of Volterra. However, she thought the Volturi was after her. Alice's vision told me otherwise. I knew they were coming for me…for Bella.

"I'm going to let you up." I said to her sternly. She thrashed beneath my weight, trying to push me off her. " Listen, you have less than 5 minutes to escape before they get there. Consider me helping you live as my restitution. Go!"

I waited until her thoughts told me she was going to flee and then I released her. Bella stayed frozen where she was. I could see her looking at me like I was nuts but I held my hand up to her so she would know everything was okay.

"Why are you doing this for me? I came here to kill you. To kill her….for what you took from me."

"_Because_ of what I took from you. Had I known about you, I would have done it either way. I won't let Bella be harmed, but this was neither of our faults. James made the choice to come here and he paid the price. But you don't have to. I can't promise the Volturi won't come after you for what you did, but I'm giving you the chance to get away and you're wasting time."

Victoria turned to face me and then looked at Bella over her shoulder. I zipped around her, placing myself between them just in case.

"I loved him. And she took him from me. Because of you…because of her…Why should I let you live? Why should I let the two of you continue your lives while I'm left with nothing?"

"I'll be straight with you Victoria. I have more pressing matters to tend to. You can not kill me. It's impossible and because you can not kill me you can not kill Bella, you're wasting your-

We both turned at the same moment. The scent was too overwhelming. I flashed to Bella's side grabbing her in my arms. Victoria stood frozen, frightened where she was. The Volturi guard was advancing from the trees; their black cloaks would be barely visible to Bella.

_Edward…I'm going to kill you when this is all over I swear. You promised. You promised not to go without me. _

Alice's thoughts were coming at me fast, along with the rest of my family's. They were pissed.

**BPoV**

"Bella we've got company...on both sides," Edward grumbled pointing in front of us to where the cloaked figures were rolling in. I could barely see them it had grown so dark.

"Volturi from both sides Edward?" I asked gripping his waist. He looked down at me shaking his head.

"Alice knows. They're coming. What do you want to do? Do you want to run?"

"That wouldn't be a very good idea on your part Edward. You see, we've come all this way already. To make us chase after you would only anger me more."

I couldn't tell which one of the hooded figures spoke, but whoever it was had a voice that was soft as a whisper but clear like he was standing next to me. Pretty. The kind of voice you'd want to hear singing, but considering where it was coming from it was completely unnerving.

"My apologies Aro. I only suggested it because Bella's wish was to confront you on our own and not involve the rest of our family, as is my wish as well."

"You're family has as much to do with this as you do. They were aware of your crime, I'm sure, before you were."

Edward squeezed me to his side, his eyes darting between the guard and Victoria who still hadn't moved from between us. She turned towards us, her eyes glowing red as she stared at me in Edward's arms.

"All of this. All of this is your fault." Victoria rocked back on the balls of her feet leaping forward. I screamed, flinching behind Edward but he didn't move. One of the guardsmen, the big one, snatched Victoria out of mid-air by her hair and dragged her to the ground. She wailed, kicking her legs and clawing at him as he dragged her in front of who I could only assume was Aro. He reached out, his long arm glowing in the moonlight that was peeking through the trees, and the guardsmen forced her hand into his.

"Edward…what…what is he going to do to her," I whispered still clutching his side. Edward gritted his teeth and tightened his grip on me.

"Aro possesses an ability similar to mine, Bella. With one touch he can read every thought you've ever had. He's just read through all of Victoria's thoughts…knows what she did to Tanya."

Aro reached up and pushed back his hood and I was taken aback. All the other vampires I'd seen had be well….attractive up to this point…he was just creepy looking. Where Edward's skin appeared porcelain and flawless, Aro seemed almost translucent and yellowed, as if he was stained. His eyes were a crimson red but dulled in a way and his long black hair was pulled back into a ponytail that looked like it was too tight.

"Ah, what a fortuitous turn of events brothers. Here in front of us kneels the insolent little creature that we had chased all over Volterra. Tsk…Tsk…Victoria, you should have known that killing within the walls of my kingdom would lead to your death eventually. To have not taken Edward's offer to escape was idiotic on your part, but I do thank you. It saves me the stress of having to have you looked for."

Victoria's body began to tremble, her head whipping back and forth as she looked over the guardsmen. I could see Aro shaking his head at her, his hand flinching. Victoria screamed, clutching her wrist and threw her body to the ground. Aro wiped dust off his hands. When Victoria knelt back up her hand was gone. He had crushed it.

What impossible strength. My eyes darted up to Edward and my knees started to shake as I imagined his hands, his long graceful fingers that I loved so much being crushed by Aro. I felt sick.

"Edward, allow me to show you what little tolerance I have for miscreants."

"Bella, look away" Edward mumbled to me, turning my face towards him. I heard her painful screaming, it was so quick, and then a sound that I knew I would never be able to get out of my head. The sickly sweet smell that I recognized from when James was killed filled the air around us. My stomach heaved, the bile rising in my throat, tears pouring down my face.

It wasn't her fault. She was trying to avenge her mate. I clutched Edward, shaking, knowing that I would have done the same.

Cold hands covered mine and when I looked up it was into Alice disapproving eyes. "When I find out who's idea this was…God…You two…"

The family gathered around us. Everyone but Rosalie. They all looked angry; except for Esme…she was pissed.

"Brother Carlisle! What a pleasure it is to see you again after so long. Quite the coven you established for yourself here…almost as large as my own." l

"The pleasure is all yours, I assure you." Carlisle's voice came out calm though I wouldn't have expected any different. "What may I ask, brings _you_ all the way from Volterra?"

"Oh, I'm sure you know." Aro's red gaze flickered to me and Edward. I shrank against him but he was still as a statue. The rest of the Volturi removed their hoods when Aro turned around, the smallest one couldn't have been more than 14 when she was changed. Her hair was flaxen blonde, her tiny mouth as red as her eyes and painted in a devilish grin. Next to her stood a boy who could have been her twin. They were holding hands, their eyes scanning over each of us.

I could feel the goose bumps rising on my skin. Esme must have noticed me shivering because she stepped to my side and placed her sweater over my shoulders.

"I hate to travel, you know this well Carlisle. But when I was informed…someone in your great coven broke one our highest laws…I felt the need to personally see to it. I assure you, I will be fair in my judgment…but really in this situation is there any argument to be made?

Aro laughed, turning back to look over his shoulder as if had just made a joke. I didn't hear a joke.

Edward hissed and let me go. Emmett immediately appeared at my side grabbing me in his arms. Edward's expression was one of pure rage, the angriest I had ever seen him but he didn't move. Carlisle had come over putting his hand on his shoulder, stepping between him and Aro.

"An argument can be made of anything. Perhaps if you knew the dynamic of Edward and Bella's relationship you would see that." Carlisle took a step closer to Aro, swatting at Edward who tried to grab him with one hand and offering Aro the other. I started shaking in Emmett's arms. I didn't want Carlisle to get hurt.

"It is not your thoughts that concern me Carlisle. It is Edwards. You," he pointed at Edward with his long index finger, "Front and center!"

Edward cast a look at me over his shoulder and took a step forward. I had promised to follow him into the dark and thrashed against Emmett's arms to reach for him. For all I knew Aro would have taken him down right then. Emmett let me go and I tripped over my own two feet reaching for Edward's hand. He turned around, stopping short so that I landed in his arms.

"Bella stay back. Please. He's only going to read my thoughts."

I could see it in his eyes that he was lying. I gripped him harder. "I told you already. You go. I go."

Edward closed his eyes for a moment and the turned around holding me against his back. He walked towards Aro going a step closer so that I was standing next to Carlisle. I almost missed the look the two of them shared. Almost but not quite, and moved to stand beside Edward. My knees were shaking yes, as I stared into the eyes of the group of murderous vampires, well all except for one. He was looking at his slippered foot as it swept back and forth across the dirt.

"I can't tell if your little pet is extremely brave or extremely stupid to face us this way." Aro spat, his eyes focused on me, pupils dilating as the wind swept across me probably blowing my scent right up his nose. Edward stiffened beside me, loosening his grip then thinking better and holding me tighter.

"Bella is beyond brave Aro. Her loyalty knows no boundaries though I will admit she can be extremely stubborn." In a moment of irritation I rolled my eyes up at him but when I caught the look on his face I could tell Aro's thoughts were giving him reason to warn me just how dangerous of a situation I had forced myself into. I thought for a moment that I should have listened to him but then Edward pulled me closer to him, his thumb brushing against the skin on my side and I was reminded why I was here. It was a gesture so small that it had probably gone unnoticed by everyone else but I was all I needed.

Aro took a step closer to us and the shuffling of feet all around me was audible in the air as everyone closed in on us. Emmett's distinct growl came from behind us and Carlisle whipped around shushing him.

"I'd advise you to control you fledglings Carlisle. My patience has been worn very thin."

"As long as you do the same and we can speak calmly without incident Aro."

Aro laughed taking another step toward Edward and me. I froze, lowering my eyes to the ground for a moment then looking back at him from under my lashes. His scent filled my lungs, sweet yet stale almost. Like old lotion.

"Edward. Give me your hands." He was speaking to Edward but looking at me. Edward raised his hands slowly and I reached up quickly without thinking to pull his hands back. All I could think of was his graceful fingers falling to dust at my feet, but as if I didn't already know it, my efforts were wasted. Edward placed his hands gently in Aro's who held them like they were meeting for the first time and just shaking hands.

My eyes searched Edwards face for any indication that he was being hurt. His face was an emotionless mask while Aro's on the other hand displayed an array of emotions. Aro's eyes bulged as he looked back and forth between us then back towards the bored slippered guy then back at us.

"Remarkable to say the least. La Tua Canatnte and here she stands still alive before us. And to have tasted her blood…not once…not twice…but three times…" How can you even bare to stand next to her let alone have intercourse?"

Bored slipped guys eyes rose to mine for the first time and I blushed full on knowing that Aro had just seen everything Edward and I had ever done. Wrong move on my part. Edward froze up beside me and said through gritted teeth-

"It's not without extreme difficulty as I'm sure you have seen. But my love for Bella is stronger than my thirst for her blood. Her beating heart keeps her alive in more ways than one."

Aro smiled this creepy smile and stepped sideways in front of me. I could hear everyone hissing behind me, could only imagine the looks on their faces if the expressions of the guard was any indication.

"Relax everyone. No need for hostilities. I am quite intrigued by Edward's plaything here." He turned his back to us facing the two guardsmen that flanked his sides. "It seems that Bella's thoughts are mute to Edward. How wonderful and surprising. I would love to try," Aro turned back to me with eerie smile still on his face.

Esme was the one who hissed behind me this time. I glanced over my shoulder watching as her face relaxed no doubt because of Jasper before turning my head back towards Edward. He nodded at me reassuringly and placed himself between Aro and me before gently placing my hands in his. He pulled away slowly staring into Aro's eyes though I could tell he was intently listening to the thoughts of the guard.

Aro's eyes seemed to twinkle for a moment as he cupped my hand between his. His skin felt nothing like Edwards…or any of the Cullens for that matter. They were marble…smooth…cold. Aro's skin felt like I could crush it but it was so cold it actually stung.

His creepy little smile spread into and wider creepier one and I felt myself unconsciously sinking further behind Edward. I didn't want Aro to be touching me anymore, didn't like the fact that he was reading into every thought I'd ever had. What had he seen that made him smile at me that way?

"Confounded. I am simply confounded. Nothing. I saw absolutely nothing." He seemed gleeful and appeared in front of Carlisle in the blink of an eye. "How envious and disappointed I feel right now Carlisle. You have collected these treasures here and did not see fit to share with me."

Carlisle relaxed his stance, and ran his hand through his hair, something that I'd seen Edward do a million times. "Aro, my family stays together on their own free will. It's is purely by coincidence that a few of my children happen to be gifted."

"Ha…listen to you. Family." Aro turned away shaking his head stepping back in between the bored looking vampire and one that had this bitter looking scowl on his face. As if it was an annoyance to be here.

"So long have you lived this cushy little life Carlisle that it seems you have forgotten just what you are. You have even allowed you fledglings to be disillusioned into thinking they can have their humanity back. Working…going to school… grocery shopping. It's extremely irresponsible on your part. No wonder young Edward here thinks its okay to go cavorting around with his human "girlfriend"." Aro laughed looking back and forth between his guards expecting them to laugh with him. No one did. I got the feeling that happened a lot.

"My _family" _Carlisle stressed, "exhibits more self-control than you can see in our thoughts Aro. And I am careful not to allow them in public until I feel they are capable of handling it. Which is more than I can say for you." Carlisle narrowed his eyes at Aro who scoffed and turned away.

"True I have made a few mistakes in my time but I am not the one on trial here. A crime as been committed. A crime will be punished."

With in seconds I saw my life crumbling before my eyes. Aro snapped his fingers and Edward was wretched from my side. I lurched forward reaching for him but Carlisle pulled me back. I thrashed against him, hot tears streaming down my face as Edward was dragged to his knees in front of Aro. I wanted to scream but couldn't find my voice. I felt like I was drowning and choking all at the same time.

"Bella, I'm okay," Edward said calmly. So calm that something in me believed him and I calmed down myself. He craned his neck to look at me, his eyes soft when they met mine and smiled before mouthing I love you. There was a mischievous glint in his eye that I wouldn't have known had I not know him so well. I threw a look at Alice who was smiling. Edward had let himself be taken from me…but why?

"Edward Cullen, do you realize the severity of the crime you have committed?

He nodded in unison with my shaking knees. I felt anxious having him be so far from me even it was only a few feet. I needed to be next to and made one last attempt but Carlisle's hold on me was too tight.

"I have placed my life in Bella's hands as she has done for me time and time again. I'm sure you can understand what its like to love someone that much. You have a wife of your own do you not?"

Aro smiled acerbically at him moving to step closer. I cringed when he held his hand up, motioning for the bigger guard to come forward. Edward tilted his head up, from the side of his face I could see he was smiling though I couldn't imagine why. The guardsmen loomed over him but his eyes were on me.

"Yes Felix, she is beautiful. Thank you for your compliments but I am quite protective of her. Go anywhere near her and I'll rip your arms off," Edward casually threatened still smiling. Aro grabbed Edward's chin yanking it back to face him and stared into his eyes.

"Your gift would prove quite useful to me. While our gifts are similar I do not have the range that you have. You'd be an asset on tracking expeditions."

"I'm rubbish at tracking Aro. You've seen this."

"Yes, but with training…I'm sure we could enhance your skills. I have given it some thought, though I'm sure you know this…so I say it for the benefit for those involved. I will spare your life Edward…to kill you would be such a waste, if you would join my royal guard. I extend the invitation to you two…Jasper and Alice."

"I'll pass." The three of them said in unison. Aro's face turned from an expression of slight amusement to anger in the blink of an eye. His hand crashed into Edward's face and I found my voice screaming at the same time.

Edwards head hung for a moment to long for my taste but then he straightened his up and turned back to face me.

"I'm fine Bella. Aro is just not used to people saying no to him."

This seemed to anger Aro even more, having his ineptitudes put on display, and he snapped his fingers again. Felix knew what to do before any words were even spoken and turned, charging at Carlisle and me. Carlisle moved backwards, me screaming in arms but Felix didn't get very far. Edward had ripped himself from the other guardsman's grasp and tackled Felix. The ground shook beneath my feet as their bodies crashed to the ground. All I could hear was my own screaming in my ears, my eyes unable to follow the brawl going on before my eyes.

There was a momentary pause, where Edward was pinned to the ground growling so hard that I could see his body shaking underneath Felix but then Felix's large form seemed to be sailing into the air. Edward back on his feet in seconds, quick as a cat, ready for Felix's next attack but something distracted him. He stopped, horror on his face as he turned to me screaming-

"No!" He roared and then turned towards the small girl vampire who had moved into the space between me and Aro smiling. Edward sprang towards her then stopped on his toes. Her smiled widened and I watched in horror as he fell to his knees.

Esme screamed, moving forward to attack the girl but Carlisle caught a hold of her arm before she passed us, throwing her back towards Emmett. I was confused…didn't understand was happening to him…had she some how stopped him in his tracks, frozen him in the awkward position so he wouldn't attack her?

I wish I had of been right….but I had never been so wrong in my life.

Edward screamed, his back curving unnaturally as he fell face forward in the ground.

What I had heard coming from his bedroom earlier was nothing compared to the sound he was making now. I felt an immense pressure on my head, as if it were being squeezed in a vice.

"Stop!" I screamed using all the strength I could muster to push against Carlisle arms. He was as equally horrified as me and let go, sending me falling to the ground. I scrambled towards Edward. The closer I got the more the agony was apparent on his face and the pressure on my brain grew stronger.

I screamed for them stop doing what ever they were doing but it only seemed to be getting worse. My heart started pounding so hard and fast I was sure I was going into cardiac arrest but I had to reach him so I kept crawling. The pressure on my brain increased as Edwards screams grew louder, making my vision blurry and I felt a dead weight bearing down on me. I knew I was about to pass out but I had to reach him. I fought against myself crawling, scratching at the earth until I reached him. The second my hand touched him he let out an unearthly shriek that shattered my heart into a million little pieces and something in my brain just snapped.

Stars exploded behind my closed eyes as my body slumped across his. Everything sounded like I was being held underwater but the only sound I cared to hear wasn't there. Edward had stopped screaming. His body had stopped writhing beneath mine. He lay motionless, only the rise and fall of his unnecessary breaths giving way that he wasn't dead…or were we.

And then I felt his icy hand rising up my arm and everything came into focus at once. I raised my eyes to meet the tiny vampire girls. She looked angry and confused, her red lips pursed in frustration.

"Bella," Edward whispered beneath as he brought both him arms up, encircling me and pulling me down. I felt his lips smiling into my skin and shuddered at the feeling. I could hear again, Alice telling Edward not to move me. Carlisle yelling for Emmett and Jasper to relax… not to attack.

And then Aro's voice-

"Jane. Did I tell you to stop?"

I raised my eyes to hers, bracing myself for that evil smile and Edwards shrieking but there was no smile. Her face was twisted up in frustration and Edward was laughing beneath me. And then Alice was laughing behind me and I was very confused.

Aro went and touched Jane's hand and whipped his around to face me. I was frozen where I knelt, cradling Edwards body beneath me.

"Inconceivable. What is the meaning of this?" Aro flashed over in front of us, startling me but Edward held me still, his hands pressing my chest to his, his lips brushing on my skin. "Focus Bella," he whispered but focus on what? The angry vampire with the bloody red eyes two inches from my face or that fact that Edward cold lips were sending shivers down my spine?

Aro's hand darted beneath me, grabbing a hold of Edwards arm and I felt my head swoon, something pulling stretching, making my focus go all tunnel vision. Oh…that.

Aro hissed, pulling himself from the ground in one fluid motion and turned toward the bored vampire who was no longer bored. He looked amused.

"Marcus…what is the meaning of this? Nothing! I hear nothing from him anymore!" He spat and Marcus lifted his head and one of his hands at the same time and looked at his fingers nails.

"Isn't it quite obvious Aro? The girl's mind is obviously shielding her. Because of the connection she has with young Edward here, her mind has forced itself to protect him as well. To be able to use her gift as a human speaks volumes to the relationship between them which is the strongest I have seen since…Didyme and I."

Aro seethed, turning back towards us but Marcus had moved past him, and was looming over Edward and I with his hand outstretched towards me.

"I will not hurt you Isabella. On this you have my word. Give me your hand."

"Edward…what do I do?" I asked…my voice shaky…my throat scratchy from all the screaming I had done.

"Give him your hand Bella."

So I did, keeping one hand on Edward at all time. The back of my mind was trying to wrap itself around what Marcus had said about me protecting Edward but the most forefront part knew it had to focus…and to not take my hand off him for one second, so I kept on hand on his chest as Marcus pulled me to my feet and Edward followed.

I looked around at my family who were all looking at me with the same shocked and awe filled expression on their faces and then back at the Volturi guard…and Jane who looked like she wanted to kill me before my eyes settled on Marcus's face.

He was the oldest looking vampire I had ever seen. His eyes were just as menacing as Aro's but with a certain gentleness hidden beneath them.

"This has gone on long enough!" Came another voice from behind Marcus and Aro. It was the bitter looking one. He stepped forward, with the guard following close behind up to Marcus's side.

"Gift or no gift the girl is still human. She knows too much…she is a liability. She must be dispatched."

Edward growled, I could see him readying to spring on Mr. Bitterman but Marcus stepped in between them.

"Aro has extended an offer to Edward and the other gifted members of the Cullen coven. I can sense the connection that all of them feel with Isabella, the fact that they have all come here shows that. I feel it is only fair to re-issue this offer. Isabella is considered by them a part of their…family. I for one would like to have her as a guard."

Marcus turned to Aro who had anger burning in his eyes. "Do you object Aro? Consider the great addition Isabella would be to our guard. As a vampire her gift would surely be stronger."

"That may be so. Had Edward any intentions of changing her I would not object. Unfortunately he doesn't, nor does he have any intentions of sitting idly by while some else does it. His decision is made. She will not be changed. Therefore she must die."

I felt my knees give, having my death pronounced so but Edward held me up. His body was shaking with anger but he was speechless and I saw why.

"If Bell is changed will you let them be?" Carlisle said stepping next to Marcus and Aro. Esme was attached at his hip between him and Edward, her hand calmly and tenderly covering his.

"Yes, but she must join the guard."

"I wont!" I stupidly called out but did not regret my words.

"Marcus, Caius, Aro. I have sat idly by watching you three tear through families and covens alike. We have not always seen eye to eye but I have always held great faith in your fairness and nobility. To force someone to join you by putting a price on their heads is wrong and you know it."

The three of them lined up in front of Carlisle but to me he looked bigger than the three of them put together.

"I will not allow you to tear my family apart. I will not allow you to hurt my son or my daughter. Allow Bella to be changed and make the decision for herself. If she so chooses to join you, I would not stand in her way but do not force her hand."

"Bella will not be changed!" Edward roared beside me and for the first time I actually saw Esme get rough with him. She covered his mouth with her hand silencing him. "She will die if she's not Edward. I will never regret you brining Bella into our lives but I will remind you that you brought this on her and yourself. If this is the only way for you to live then it must be."

Edward slumped at my side, his eyes lowered to the ground not meeting my gaze or anyone else's.

"So be it," Aro said and then he turned towards us. "Are you in agreement? That you will be changed?"

I nodded slowly. A part of me was relived but a bigger part of me was crushed. This was what I wanted…to be changed…to be able to be with Edward forever and for all time…but I didn't want the decision to made like this. I wanted Edward to decide this because he loved me and wanted it…not because my only options were immortal death or death death.

I heard a shrieking in the air above me, Alice's small frame sailing and landing at my side just as Aro smiled at me and ripped me from Edwards defeated arms. Four sets of hands reached for me as Aro ghosted with me backwards in his arms, his fingernail digging into my skin, cutting me, making the blood run.

All eyes turned on me, Emmett and Jasper both looking like they wanted to back away but taking cautious steps towards me. Edward had all but thrown himself to the ground and I could only imagine how he felt. Even I could smell my blood.

My heart beat in my chest threatening to break out of my rib cage as Aro's face came down towards my neck. I kept my eyes on Edward, waiting for the bite and the burning venom to come but blinked and he was gone. Less then a second later I felt my body be pulled down to the ground and choked back a scream because I knew the hands that pulled me.

Edward's hands tangled into my hair right before my head hit the ground. I wrapped my arms around his back and stared up into his smoldering red eyes for a moment trying to show through my fright that I loved him and wanted this right before I felt his razor sharp teeth at my neck.

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**A/N I know you may hate me for another cliff hanger but I wouldn't be being me if i didn't do it...**


	51. Blindsided

**A/N Okay, I know it's been forever since I've updated but I've suffered horrible writers block, a bloody heat wave that won't seem to end, and an extreme unwillingness to end this story.**

**It's my baby. But here you have it. The next to last chapter of this part of my story. I hope you enjoy.  
**

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**Blindsided**

**EPoV**

I could feel the blood coursing through Bella's veins as my teeth grazed the skin of her neck. She stiffened momentarily and then relaxed, craning her neck more into my mouth. The monster inside me was pleading that we sink our teeth into her, the fire raging in the back of my throat at full blast urged me to quench the thirst that was burning me from the inside out, but I fought against it. Every muscle in my body screamed but I stilled and fought against my instincts…against what I was. It wouldn't happen this way.

"NO! Not like this!" I growled out. I could feel the venom dripping from the corners of my mouth probably falling on Bella's face. She squirmed beneath me and I leaned away pulling her to her feet and then sent her directly into Carlisle's arms. I didn't trust myself to hold onto her.

"It has been decided," Aro spat at me. "If you will not do it yourself, I would be more than happy to do it for you." I growled as Aro thought of sinking his filthy teeth into Bella and "accidentally" draining her. It was made all the more worse by the picture of them both being stark naked while Bella's bruised and battered legs were wrapped around his waist.

"Over my pile of ashes Aro. You keep your hands off of her!" I was seething, my body shaking with anger.

"Edward…what are you doing?" Bella pleaded from behind me. I stole a quick glance at her over my shoulder. Her face was drained of all color but her eyes glistened with madness. I silently prayed that whatever she was doing….however she was doing it….wouldn't do any permanent damage.

"Are you that stubborn that you would rather have me kill the girl than to change her?" Aro said laughing as he moved to step in front of me. His thoughts betrayed him, he was considering having me restrained now that Bella wasn't touching me anymore…but that was because he couldn't see. He wouldn't know.

"Bella will be changed. But not here…not like this…and not by you. She deserves better than that. Her family deserves better than that. I have taken enough from her…from them. Her life will not end without her getting the chance to say goodbye."

I lowered my head in defeat. Aro stared me down trying to gauge whether or not I was telling the truth. "You can trust what I say Aro. It would be pointless of me to lie to you. One touch and you would know."

"It will happen Aro. After the wedding…which will be this summer. Bella will be one of us by the end of the summer." Alice bravely flitted past me, shaking off Jasper's grasp and placing her small hands in Aro's.

I saw it all. Bella being walked down the aisle by a smiling Charlie. Her cheeks flushed pink beneath her veil as he placed her hand in mine. The "honeymoon" where it would happen. Bella and I kneeling face to face in the middle of our bed, our fingers linked together as Carlisle crawled up behind her and held onto my shoulder as he took the first bite. And then her…breathtakingly beautiful even with the glowing red eyes as she sat beside me with the sun glistening off her skin. There was a visible aura of power around her…one that made her glow.

Aro saw it too. He looked past me, his eyes focusing on Bella for a moment…just a moment too long before he ripped his hands away from Alice's turning his back to us. He suddenly started thinking of the song "Mellow Yellow", blocking out whatever it was he knew I would see.

"Fine!" He snapped. "Do whatever you need to do. Make your arrangements… have your little wedding. I'm giving you until the end of the summer before I expect you to make an appearance in my chambers."

"That's it?" Caius bellowed. "You made us come all this way and we're just going to leave them all alive?"

"We made a deal…what would you have me do?" Aro shot a look at me over his shoulder once more considering shoving me into the dying flames that had engulfed Victoria's body before turning back to Caius.

"I'd like a consolation prize for my travels. How do we know they'll keep up their end of the bargain? I think we should have some collateral at least." Caius' eyes scanned over the family as he thought of which one he'd take. We moved closer together on instinct as Aro's broke his concentration.

"You're being ridiculous Caius. Weddings are joyous family occasions. Besides we'll have our consolation prize soon enough." "Mellow Yellow" turned up loudly in his head and he had moved on to translating it into German as I narrowed my eyes at him. I turned to look at Alice but she just shrugged her shoulders at me.

"A pleasure to see you again Carlisle as always. And just so there's no confusion here…understand Edward…that if Bella is not changed by the end of this summer I will kill you…all. Until next time…" and then he took a theatrical bow making a sweeping motion with his hand, silently commanding everyone to follow him.

We waited on edge as the Volturi left as quickly as they came. The warmth that had encircled me was dissipating slowly as they moved further and further away. I turned just as Bella exhaled loudly and slumped over in Carlisle's arms.

"She's okay Edward," Alice said gripping my arm. "She's lost a lot of blood today…and imagine how exhausted she must be…to have protected you that long. Let her mind protect itself now." She shook her head and stepped away, moving to wrap her arms around Jaspers waist as we all fell in line and trooped home.

Everyone's thoughts centered on relief that no one had been really hurt. Emmett came to walk beside me, clasping his hand over my shoulder.

"I'd of ripped that little blond chicks head off for you…you know that right…Alice stopped me. I guess she knew you would be okay." We both looked at Bella who was passed out, only the top of her head visible pass Carlisle's shoulder.

We continued in a thoughtful silence. Emmett was angry that Rosalie didn't come. He was beginning to doubt her loyalties to the family but I had to stop him. Rosalie's loyalties were just as fierce as the rest of us. I knew why she didn't come.

"They're hiding something from us Em."

"Who?"

"Bella and Rosalie…I've been trying to figure it out myself but haven't been able to. Every time I bring it up to Bella she gets angry and makes me promise not to pry…but now I think I need to know. If whatever they are hiding is bad enough that Rose wouldn't want to be around Aro…it must be serious."

He nodded as he walked up the stairs ahead of me. "I'll bet you anything it has something to do with Tanya," he murmured and then disappeared into the house.

Carlisle placed Bella in his room to rest as my windows were still broken and the scent of rain was heavy in the air. The rest of night passed quietly as everyone went their separate way to take stock of all that occurred. I waited patiently by Bella's bedside, not trusting myself to lie next to her. My throat burned like I was eating fire…but I wouldn't leave her side. No one but Alice knew how dangerously close we had come to losing everything…and no one needed to. Hours passed before anyone disturbed us. As I expected Alice came in holding a bottle of pain killers and a glass of water.

"She's gonna have one hell of a headache when she wakes up," she said shaking the bottle.

"Thanks," I muttered. I knew what she was here for and I wasn't ready to deal with it.

"I used to get those too you know…when I was human…when the picture in my head was more like a movie than a flicker."

"I got them too."

"I bet. At least I could pass my vision off as vivid day dreams." Alice smirked at me letting her eyes rest on Bella's face. I looked at her too…waiting…waiting for her to open her eyes so I'd know she was okay.

"She's going to be fine Edward. Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure you're not a mind reader?"

"No, but I can read you…very well…and that's how I know you're going to argue about this."

"Of course I am. Wouldn't you do the same if it were Jasper's soul you were throwing away?"

Alice and I stared at each other for a moment as she thought it over. She was trying to imagine herself in my place looking at Jasper lying prone on a bed. The image made her shiver and she curled herself up wrapping her arms around her knees.

"It's not like I don't understand," she finally said. "But at this point you really don't have a choice. What's the alternative? To run? You'd be running forever. Aro would never stop looking for her and you know it."

"I know…but I would never let him find her. He'd be so busy looking for us that he'd leave you guys alone."

"Or he'd try to pick us off one by one until you came out of hiding. Besides you owe us."

A jolt of anger flashed through me so quickly I didn't even have sense enough to listen to Alice's next thoughts. In the next second I found myself looming over her baring my teeth.

"I owe you what? Bella's life? For what? Nothing and no one in this world is worth giving up Bella's life. You understand?"

Alice placed her palms on my chest and pushed me away. "Edward, that's not what I mean and you know it. You owe us not to break up the family. You're my brother Edward…and I love you. We wouldn't want you or Bella to leave. We belong together."

Alice swiftly left them room not giving me a chance to respond. I placed myself back at Bella's side and swept back a lock of her hair that had fallen against her face as I rested my back against the night stand. Her heart started to quicken- she always woke up the same way- and she reached out for my hand which I slipped into hers. Her fingers wrapped around mine tightly and she gasped wrenching herself up from the bed.

"Edward?"

"Shhh Bella, I'm here. I'm here love."

Bella whipped her head around to face me then winced squeezing the sides of head and flopping back against the bed.

"My head," she moaned out and for a moment I wanted to laugh but she was in pain so I didn't. I gave her the pain killers and sat holding her hands until the tension eased from her face.

"Whisper please. Everything is really loud. I swear I can hear my own heart beating."

"Then you know how beautiful it sounds…why I can't live without it." I leaned over resting my head on said heartbeat to drive the point home. This sound…was my favorite sound of all of my existence…I could pick it out of thousands.

"Edward…what happened out there…what was that…that I did?"

"I don't exactly know Bella. But we have time… all the time in the world to figure it out. Right now I need to know that you're okay."

"I'm okay…I think. How is…everyone else?"

"Relieved. Except for Rosalie. She won't come near the house. She took Emmett and they left to hunt. They'll be back soon though. Emmett is worried about you."

"For me Edward…could you leave this thing with Rosalie and me alone? There are so many more important things to worry about right now. Please." I couldn't take her pleading at the moment. She sounded terrible and it was ripping a hole through me. I nodded against her chest and she reached up running her fingers through my hair.

"You're right…there are more important things to worry about. For now we need to keep up appearances. I've been thinking about it and for Charlie's sake…we'll finish school…go to graduation and then have a small wedding…you know so he can be there and you can say goodbye and then we'll leave."

"Where will we go?" I knew she was trying to hide it but I could hear the way her breathe caught in her throat.

"Somewhere they won't think to look. And we can't tell anyone either. To protect them they can't know where we are." I should have known she'd pick up on what I was saying faster then I'd want her to. Bella scrambled from underneath me and wobbled toward the door without so much as looking at me.

"Alice is right. That's exactly what Aro would do…pick them off one by one until he got what he wanted. And who's to say he stop at just your family…Charlie, Renee, Jake…no one would be safe. I have to do this Edward."

She slammed the door and stomped down the stairs dragging my cold heart along the ground behind her. I couldn't let her do this.

Bella was sitting on the couch between Esme and Alice when I got downstairs. Everyone's thoughts swarmed at me at once. They were waiting for Rose and Emmett to get home so we call all discuss this.

"There nothing to discuss," I snapped at them but Bella just rolled her eyes and leaned over to rest her head on Esme's shoulder.

"Son it's not like we don't understand why you're opposed to this, but it's not your life to control. If this wasn't what Bella wanted then we'd find a way out of it," Carlisle said putting his hand on my shoulder and pushing me in a chair.

"I don't think any of you understand why I feel this way. You couldn't possibly.

Emmett and Rose walked through the door moments later, both sets of eyes on my face. Emmett walked right over to the couch and ran his fingers through Bella hair, pulling her head back so she was looking up at him.

"You okay there Bella?" He asked her and I could see that he was really concerned. She nodded and he perched on the couch behind her. I couldn't help but notice that the entire family was sitting across from me. It felt like it was all of them versus me and from everyone's thoughts I knew this was a battle I was going to lose. Bella was going to be changed no matter what I said.

"It's okay Edward. This is what I want. I would have asked anyway." Bella's voice was soft as she spoke to me…the way she spoke to me when she was trying to soothe me. It wasn't working this time. Anger at her hand being forced was burning in my veins. I swallowed back my venom and turned away from her.

"What we need to talk about now is how this is going to be handled. We need to figure out what we're going to orchestrate to account for Bella's disappearance."

"I think it would be easiest for everyone if they think that maybe she died…no one would come looking for her."

A growl erupted violently from my chest and I had to grip the arms rests of the chair to keep from attacking my parents. Couldn't they see what they were doing to Bella? Couldn't they smell her tears?

"No…I don't want that. That would kill Charlie and Renee and besides I think Jacob would know. I don't know that he'd be able to keep that from Charlie. It would get back to him somehow I was still alive."

Carlisle nodded thinking that she was probably right. He started thinking of other ways around it…someway that would leave everyone Bella loved out of the loop. My heart ached for her. For the rest of us this part was fairly easy. No one had missed Alice since they had locked her away, Esme was already presumed dead, Rosalie and Emmett had left pools of blood in their wake, and everyone assumed Carlisle had suffered the same fate that his father did, Jasper had gone to war so it was easy to guess what had happened to him, and my family was dead. To have to put her through this would make it all the more worse.

"No. We can't do this…I can't do this to her Carlisle. I'll go to Volterra…I'll offer myself in return for Bella's life…and the lives of the rest of you."

Bella launched herself across the room at me with fists flying and tears pouring from her eyes.

"You idiot! You're not doing that…don't even think about it! This is my decision Edward. I want this! And I want you! Here with me…Forever!" She beat her fist on my chest angrily sobbing and hiccuping. I was at a loss for words. I held her in my arms until she calmed down and when she did I let her go. The look in her eye told me she had found her resolve and in that moment I wished I could read her mind. Her face crumpled into to many different expressions for me to read but her eyes said it all.

"This is going to happen Edward. With or without you by my side. The lives of everyone in this room mean more to me than the soul you think I'm giving up. What would it matter anyway? I wouldn't want to be in heaven if you weren't there so until you come to you senses…I'll stay away. Until it doesn't hurt you anymore…for me to be like you…I'll stay away. And when you're ready…if you ever are…I'll be waiting."

She turned her back on me and faced Alice. I felt like my body was crumpling into pieces and reached out to grab her hand but in my moment of disbelief at what she said I moved too slow.

"Alice…will you stay with me? Keep me out of trouble until I can control myself. I…I don't want to hurt anyone…I don't want to tear you away from anyone but I trust you watching out for me…I trust you to know what I'm going to do before I do it…I think with you're help I'll be okay."

Alice and Jasper both nodded as I fell to my knees. I couldn't find the words to speak. I just knelt on my knees behind her crushing the floor beneath my hands as she made her plans…leaving me out of them.

"Carlisle, I'd like to wait until after graduation. Edward," and she stuttered when saying my name, "was right about one thing. I want the chance to say goodbye to everyone. We'll tell them that I moved to Europe or something…that would explain why I don't come home often. I'll go to Aro. I'll tell him that I don't want to join the guard but I was turned as promised and that he'll have to leave us alone now."

"If that's what you'd like to do then fine. We'll do it your way. But when you're ready to go to Volterra…I'll be going with you. I won't have you going in there alone."

She nodded and then breathed deeply a few times before speaking again. "One more thing. Before it happens…I want some time. A few weeks maybe…to go home…to Charlie. I want to leave him with some good memories of me before I go. I want to make sure things are okay between us before I have to leave…but we'll wait until after graduation for that as well. I'll tell him…that Edward and I…that we broke up…." Her words became unintelligible after that because she was crying so hard. But we all understood what she was saying and still I couldn't move. Still I couldn't speak. I felt like my life was slipping away from me as I grasped at the carpet. When she turned around to face me and I saw the hurt in her eyes I couldn't take it anymore. I jumped to my feet and stalked from the room. The anger boiled in me and my fist flew out punching the wall beside me. It crumpled at my feet shaking the foundation of the house.

I roared as I ripped the back door from the hinges and tossed it behind me not caring where it landed. I felt like I could no longer control my body and ran like a torrent through the trees. I stopped at the brook and broke down to my knees beating in anger at the earth.

How had it come to this? I didn't know. Nor do I know how long I sat out burning with anger. A million thoughts ran through my head while I was out there and it was only after I heard Emmett's footsteps that I thought of anything besides how to change Bella's mind.

"Go away!" I spat at him. Instead of listening he sat right next to me putting his arm around my shoulder.

"You're hurting not helping. You know that right?" Emmett's grip tightened on me as he replayed Bella crumpling to her knees when I punched the wall and hysterically crying. I cringed away from him but he held me tighter.

"No. You need to see this. You need to see what you're doing to her by being a fool." His thoughts came at me slower and I damn near fell over in pain when he showed me Bella suggesting she go to Volterra now and letting Aro kill her since it was so clear I would rather she die anyway. He showed me Bella throwing a tantrum of her own and then grabbing the sides of her head and blacking out again.I was gasping for air by the time he finished.

"I need to go to her Emmett. Let me go."

"I know you do. But me and you are gonna have a little talk first." I nodded relaxing my shoulders until he let go of me.

"I need you to help me understand your point of view here because I honestly don't. From the first time…when you sucked Tanya's venom out of her and I damn near had to rip your head off to get you off her…I never understood why you didn't just let it happen."

"All I want for her is a life Emmett. A happy human life. I'd give her everything if I could. If there was a way…I'd make myself human for her. Marry her…give her children. I'd give anything just to be able to take her to a damn beach for god sake."

"You should have thought of that a long time ago. We could have left. I'd of kept you away from her…but Alice told me what she saw…I honestly don't know that I would have been able to deny you that. She loves you man. Enough to give up her life to have a life with you. Even if there was a way…a way to fight our way out of this she wouldn't be happy growing old with you. And she'd die one day. She could get sick…an accident. Someday something would separate you and I shudder to even think about what that would do to you."

"I'd die. I'd want you to kill me Emmett. I know you'd do that for me."

For once I didn't see it coming. Emmett hit me so hard he actually cracked my face. I lay back against the ground waiting for my face to heal when Emmett snarled at me.

"That's one of the dumbest things I've ever heard you say you asshole. I would never! Say that again and see what happens to you. See if I don't beat your ass within an inch of your broody fucking life and then make you live with it."

I'd seen Emmett angry before but never like this. "What else could I do Emmett?" I was whining now but I couldn't help it.

"Be smart. Don't be a retard. And stop hurting her. You don't think she's scared out of her mind right now. You don't think she needs you? This would be a lot easier for her if you were okay with it. If she knew that you'd be there for her…that you'd still want her."

My mouth fell open while I tried to comprehend what he was saying. "Wait…is that what she thinks. That I wouldn't want to be with her anymore?"

"Duh stupid. She knows how you feel about your soul and all. She knows that has a lot to do with it but she also thinks that you're not going to love her anymore. She thinks you only love her now because she's human and she makes you feel human. She thinks you won't love her anymore because she won't be so pure anymore…even if she thinks you're the purest thing walking this earth despite all you've done."

I pulled at my hair in frustration ready to launch my self and beg for her forgiveness but Emmett gripped my arm holding me in place.

"Don't you think it would be just a little easier for you anyway? How many times have you fought against yourself from doing what you've really wanted to do? I know you…I can see it in your eyes that you want it too. You just think you're being selfish but let me clue you in on something. You're being selfish by not doing it. Her life is constantly in danger around us. Don't you want to give her a chance to stand on her own? To not be the weakest link."

"I do Em. I do want it. But her life is too precious for me to end it."

"It'll end some day. Wouldn't you rather have her with you afterwards then to have to be without her for the rest of our lives? Because if you think for one minute any of us are gonna let you take the easy way out…you can forget it. We're a family…no matter how much time we may spend apart occasionally…we're a family and we stick together."

We sat in silence for a moment. He was trying to imagine what Bella would look like changed. His picture didn't hold a candle to what I had already seen but it made me want it more.

"Can you tell me…what you're so afraid of? I mean aside from the fact that you think she's going to lose her soul."

The tenderness in Emmett's voice startled me for a moment. He wasn't berating me anymore…he was really trying to understand.

"I'm afraid she'll regret it Em. That when she's consumed with blood lust and wants to slaughter a town she'll despise what she's become and despise us for it. Sure she loves me now…but will she still love me…when she looks like this." I pointed to my red eyes. "Will she still feel the same when we tell her she can't ever see her family again because she'll look too different…sound too different?"

"I think she will. Bella is stubborn. She took you back without a second thought when you left her. Her love for you…is unbreakable. Didn't you listen to anything she said…that she'd wait for you to be ready for her. Her love is unconditional for you man…even if you are breaking her heart right now…she fucking loves you. And trust me….she gets it. She gets that this hurts you…but she has apparently has more faith in your love than you do."

I thought about that for a moment. I realized that's how it had always been. Bella had always had more faith in us than I did. She saw something I was blind to.

"Emmett…let me ask you a question even though I probably already know the answer. Would you…change Rosalie if you were in my shoes? Could you do that to her?"

"Not if she didn't want me to. But I think I would try and find a way to change her mind. I can't live with out my Rosie and that's the only reason I forgave her for what she did."

"For what she did…What did she do?"

Emmett held up his hand and quickly changed the direction of his thoughts. "One thing at a time man. We all have our secrets and this isn't my secret to tell."

"You know…and you're not going to tell me?" I stared at him in shock as he slowly shook his head.

"Nope. But I'm sure you'll figure it someday…besides it won't do you any good to know now."

I slumped down beside him and lay back in the grass. He lay beside me speaking silently in his head. His thoughts weren't pushy…he was just trying to drive his point home and it was somewhere near dawn that I finally understood what I had to do.

"Thank you…for helping me with this Emmett," was all I said before I made my way back to the house. Alice was waiting on what was left of our back porch but said nothing as I passed her. She just grabbed my hand trying to send me some strength for what I had decided to do.

"Will you help me?" I asked her before walking through door.

"Only if you apologize to Esme for breaking a hole in the wall first. She's really upset you know." We smirked at each other because I knew that wasn't what Esme really wanted to hear. She wanted to know that I wasn't mad at her. Bella was still asleep anyway so I went to her first.

"Mom?" I said softly knocking on the door to her art studio. When I walked in she was just sitting on her couch gazing out the window. I sat beside her and she sighed pulling my head into her lap.

"I remember when I woke up from my change and I saw Carlisle's face for the first time. I remembered him but I'm sure you know that. I didn't hate what I had become Edward. After what I lost…I wouldn't have wanted to live that life anymore anyway. Not without my baby. Your father…he tries so hard to make up for all I lost…I wish he knew that by him simply loving me it's more than enough. I'd give anything to have my baby back…but this life…the life he's given me…It doesn't hurt so much. I have six beautiful and loving children. I may not have carried any of you under my heart Edward…but I carry you in it. So really…I don't feel like I missing anything."

I didn't have words for how much what she had said meant to me, but I gave her what I could. And she gave me what she could. Esme ran through thoughts of how my life pre-Bella and how she always hoped that I would find love somehow. She showed me thoughts of how distraught she was when I left after Tanya and I split up and how she was even more hurt watching me shrivel to nothing after I left Bella. She showed me her hopes for our future. How beautiful she thought Bella would as one of us and the most important thought. That she was sorry for it having to come to this. That she would give her life to make me human…to make us all human so we wouldn't miss out on anything but that she would be sad because she couldn't bare the thought of losing anymore of her kids so she thought things were better this way. So none of us would ever be left behind. So none of us would ever have to be alone.

I could hear Bella's heartbeat starting to quicken and knew she'd be reaching for me any second. I hesitated from pulling away from Esme but she was hearing it to so she smiled at me.

"Go ahead," Esme said me planting a kiss on my forehead. I reached my room a few moments to late. Bella was already out of bed and headed to the bathroom. I moved to follow her but she closed the door behind her and locked it.

The rest of the day wouldn't she look at me. She drove herself to school. Took her time driving back. Can't say that I blame her really. But when night came and she went to sleep in one of the guest bedrooms I was about ready to tear my hair out. All anyone could say was give her time. So time I gave her.

After a week she eventually moved back into my room only under the condition that we not speak about it. She didn't want to hear anything I had to say and every time I tried she would threaten to leave right at the moment.

The last few weeks of school passed similarly, the only difference being that she kept up pretenses at school. She would smile and laugh and act like everything was normal but when she got home she'd stay as far away from me as possible until she was ready to sleep. She'd crawl into bed where she'd cry helplessly in my arms every night.

It killed me to see her like this so when school finally ended…and we had gotten through graduation I was grateful it was going to be all over soon. We lay in bed that night curled around each other staring out the window. The house was peaceful and I liked it that way. It made what I had to do easier with no one asking questions. As I had asked Alice hadn't said a word to anyone.

"When are you leaving for Charlie's?" I asked her quietly. She shivered as my breath washed over her face.

"This weekend. After Alice's stupid party. I don't know why she's doing this."

"To commemorate your first time graduating high school. And to give you a memory…a human experience she doesn't think you should live without.

"That's nice of her. I'll try not to be too much trouble for her where she takes me. Do you know…where she's taking me?"

I nodded against her cheek and she reached up to stroke my face. I grabbed her hand and brought her palm to my mouth kissing it. Bella slowly turned over in my s and I stiffened until I could handle the change in her scent.

She ran her fingers slowly over my face from forehead to chin staring in my eyes. I closed them. It still bothered me for her to see them so red but she softly asked me to let her see.

"I wonder how long it's going to take for my eyes to change."

"About a year…if you never taste human blood. A little longer…but you'd be beautiful no matter what."

I hadn't meant to make her cry but she did. Tears started to pour from the corners of her eyes as her bottom lip trembled. I'd of done anything in that moment to make her stop so I did the only thing I could do. I kissed her softly thinking that I would be able to handle it.

Bella pressed her lips against mine harder, grabbing fistfuls of my hair pulling me into her. We hadn't been able to do this since that night. I had been too afraid to even try but with the way she was pressing against me I knew it was what she needed. This I couldn't deny either of us.

Slowly I gripped her thighs running my hand up. She moaned into my mouth pushing against me, her lips molding themselves over mine. I could hear her heart racing and wanted so badly to place my lips on her chest over it. Scraps of her shirt were flying above our heads without even a thought.

I was hungry for her in that moment. I wanted to consume every inch of her because I had no idea when or if I'd be able to do this again. I tried to stay gentle like I knew I should be as I kissed every visible inch of her. Bella moaned and twisted beneath me, directing the path of my mouth with her body. With one stolen glance at her, I could see her eyes were dark and almost as hungry as mine.

There were no words between us. Just the sounds of pants and moans as we used our hands and lips to memorize each others body. Bella dug her fingers nails into my skin, clawing at me as our mouths fought for dominance. She wasn't gentle either. She tore at my clothes out of pure need and once we both fully naked she clung to me, grabbing me, directing my cock to where she needed it the most.

I was stifled by her heat and almost considered not finishing because of how worked up I was. I pulled away from her and she seemed to move in slow motion, turning her face to look at me.

"Edward please. I need you. Please," she begged and squeezed my arms letting me know she was ready to take whatever I gave her. I pushed into her and both of us cried out in mix pain and pleasure. Her warmth enveloped me as our bodies rocked together furiously. The sweat on Bella skin made her slick and hard to hold on to. It scared me, it had never been that way…she had always fit perfectly in my hands.

I gripped her harder unwilling to let her go. She screamed and moaned beneath me begging me for more…begging me not to stop. I gave her what she wanted, drilling her into the bed over and over delving deeper into her with every thrust of my hips until the coils knotted up in my stomach and I knew I wasn't going to last much longer.

Bella had her entire body wrapped around me, swallowing me with her arms and legs and cried for more. I was almost at the point of no return but couldn't bear to disappoint her anymore than I already had. With one hand under the small of her back I lifted her, inclining her so that with ever thrust I was sure to hit that spot that made her toes curl and sure enough after a few seconds she was panting and flushed red from head to toe

We exploded at the same, staring into each others eyes and screaming each others names. I brought my lips down onto hers hard and sucked at the salt on her skin eager to savor this last taste of her. She was past being able to speak; instead she rolled over on to her side facing me and buried her face in the crook of my neck.

I held her against me using my body to cool her off and rubbed small circles into her back until I felt her heart rate slow and she fell asleep. Once I knew she was dead sleep I slipped from her arms and dressed quietly. She lay naked and peaceful on her stomach sleeping better than she had all month. It was hard to tear myself away but what I planned to do I was doing for her…for us.

Slowly I wrote the note I would leave her and in a last minute decision I ran the paper over my chest so it would catch my scent and placed it on my pillow next to her head.

The moonlight washed over her as I stood there watching her for the last few minutes and what I saw was just proof to me that I was doing the right thing.

Angry black and blue marks spotted the backs of her legs where I hadn't been gentle enough holding her. My fingers prints were clear along the small of her back and yet she slept peacefully. I moved the sheets aside and kissed each and every mark as an apology stopping at her cheek. She turned her head to me and I kissed her lips one last time.

"I love you Isabella Swan. You are and will always be my life…my very reason for existing."

With that I left her to rest. Alice met me at the garage door and handed me the small bag she had packed for me.

"Will you take care of everything while I'm gone?" I asked almost not wanting to leave.

"I made a promise to you didn't I. You do your part and I'll do mine."

I kissed Alice on the forehead and walked out to the garage. It was hard to get in that car…every last minute with her was too precious to waste but I didn't see any other way to do this.

I'd promised to do right but her and that was a promise i wasn't going to break.

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**A/N So what's his big plan. Anyone wanna take a crack at where he's going? Anyone wanna guess what he's going to do...because i already know.**

**As mentioned before this is the next to last chapter and i promise that you won't have to wait as long for the last chapter.**

**Also...not that its giving anything away but I'd really like your votes as to whether i should add a baby to the sequel...so let me know.**

**As always i thank all my readers for your continued support and hope that you check out some of my other work. **

**And please check out the sequel when it gets posted...This story is my baby...I'd hate to see it end.  
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	52. This is for Keeps

**A/N okay guys...this is the last chapter of Love Crash Heal...I'm not going to lie and say I'm not getting all teary eyed because i am.**

**I just want to thank everyone who's stuck on this story with me. I truly appreciate all you support...you've been great and it is for you that I kept it going...It is also for you that i will be writing a sequel**

**Special thanks to Twihard 104 for suggesting this song to me sooooo long ago. I kept it in the back of my mind that i wanted to use it in that last chapter...it really helped me shape the story in a way...So thanks!**

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter...and I REALLY hope all of those who read this story follow along for it sequel!**

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This is for Keeps**

**BPoV**

Waking up in the wee hours of the morning to find your boyfriend gone and a note in his place is never a great way to start your day. I almost didn't want to read it.

I was afraid it would say that he couldn't stand me being so hot and cold with my avoiding him all day then crying in his arms at night. I was afraid it would say that he couldn't deal with the choice I had made and was leaving me before I had planned for us to part.

Instead it said that he loved me, that he had some personal matters to tend to, that he'd be back in time for the party, and for me not to leave until he got back.

I stared at his note until the words started twisting and turning in on themselves, trying to wrap my mind around why he would just leave and not tell me, but all I could come up with were questions that circled in on each other. I couldn't imagine what personal matters he would have that he couldn't tell me about –we had no secrets from each other- unless he was going where the whole month I feared he'd try to go. If that was the case I had to stop him.

Just as I scrambling from the bed to go hunt down Alice and demand she tell me what he was up to she busted through the door smiling.

"Where the hell did he go?" I wailed when she jumped on the bed pushing me back against the headboard.

"Hmm…I could tell you. But I won't. Besides he threatened bodily harm if I did." She smiled a genuine smile. The first genuine smile I had seen on any of their faces since the decision about my changing had been made. It was…refreshing.

"So...," Alice poked at my thigh which was covered in black and blue. "Looks like you had some night."

"One last hurrah," I answered with fake enthusiasm. Something about her jovial mood was making me feel some kind of way. I wondered if Jasper wasn't on the other side of the door manipulating me.

"Well…I had planned for us to go shopping for the party. I had envisioned a dress…something strapless and I was even going to let you get away with wearing your stupid converse…this is your party after all…but now it seems like it's jeans and longs sleeves for you….of course this ruins all my coordination."

"Alice! Where is Edward?" I said snapping her out of her rambling. Once she got started it was hard to get her to stop. She stared at me for a second pursing her lips then smiled all Cheshire cat like.

"Getting on his plane." She smirked and flashed over to his desk returning with his laptop and snuggled next to me. "You should probably get more sleep. You're gonna need it for this weekend…oh and Rosalie wants to talk to you later. She's taking you out to breakfast."

"Thanks for planning out my day," I muttered punching the pillow pretending for a moment it was her head. I knew this face she was wearing. This was the "You're not getting any information out of me so don't ask" face.

"You _are_ grumpy when you just wake up. Go back to sleep…wake up nicer." She flipped her hand gesturing for me to turn over and rolled her eyes.

"I'd be nicer if you tell me what the hell he's up to. You obviously know or you wouldn't be sitting here all chipper like."

"Exactly your point. If he _were_ up to something, _would_ I be sitting here all chipper like?"

"Maybe…if he were doing something you didn't want me to know about. Which would explain why you are stealthily trying to hold me hostage in here."

She laughed right in my face. A loud, stomach holding laugh, and pulled me into her arms hugging me a little too tightly. "Bella…He'll be back on Sunday. I swear to you. We're way past the point of me having to hide things from you anyway. Honestly if he were doing anything I wouldn't have let him out the house."

"But how do you know he won't change his mind while he's gone? How do you know that he isn't going to go to Italy and try to bargain with the Volturi or something? You know how he is."

"You're right," she said pulling away from me. "I do know my brother better than anyone next to you…so I know that what he has here," she grabbed my hand squeezing it, "is more important to him than anything in this world. Now go back to sleep."

Rationally I knew she was right though my stomach was still twisted into knots. It wasn't like him to leave without waking me…without telling me where he was going. However I tried to take some comfort in her words. Besides, after I was changed she and Jasper would be all I had.

I drifted back to sleep but not for very long. I never slept well when Edward was away and not knowing where he was made me have nightmares, re-plays of our meeting with the Volturi, and seeing Edward face down in the dirt in the screaming. I woke up sweating with my forehead pressed against Alice's thigh.

"What are you still doing in here?" I snatched Edward's pillow from behind her still shaken from my dream and desperately in need of his comfort.

"Shopping." She tipped the screen away from me for a few seconds and closed a few windows before turning it back to me so I could see that she was buying furniture and a lot of it. We didn't talk about my dream though from the look on her face I knew she knew I was having a nightmare. Instead we picked out things I would want in my new room even though I tried to convince her that I'd be too busy wanting to kill people to care about what color my curtains were.

"If you're comfortable and have things to divert your attention you'll assimilate faster. We'll keep you well fed and I'm sure you'll be sufficiently occupied that you probably won't even think about how thirsty you are."

The playful tone in her voice gave it away. She was hinting at something but my brain was too fogged up to figure it out nor did she give me time to ask. Within seconds she was inside my closest and telling me I need to shower and get dressed because Rosalie would be ready soon.

I reached for my phone on the side table, peaked at it seeing that Edward hadn't called or texted, and then groaned rolled over burying my face in his pillow.

"I'm not going anywhere. Edward told me not to leave until he got back," I said into the pillow. My body felt like I'd been hit with a Mack truck and moving didn't seem like so great of an option for me anyway. I just wanted to stay in bed.

"Did you hear me when I said he'll be back SUNDAY?" Alice appeared at my bedside with clothes over her arm, pulled the blankets back and dumped them on me, smiled, then disappeared.

I rolled my eyes pushing out of the bed and got in the shower. I hurried getting dressed when I heard the garage door go up meaning that Rosalie was waiting in her BMW for me and as we drove to the diner in silence, I tried not to let how awkward this situation was get to me.

"So…this is new. Me and you…being alone together," I said once we had our food. She still hadn't spoken yet.

"This isn't a bonding moment. I just wanted you to know that Emmett knows…about what I did. He promised not to say anything to Edward but that doesn't mean he won't find out."

"So what if he does. Wasn't your main concern that Emmett would leave you…well he hasn't. I think we're fine."

Rosalie's eyes snapped up to mine at the same time the spoon bent in her hand. "You think this is just about Emmett?" She leaned forward across the table inches from my face. "This is about Edward too, Bella. If he finds out," she stopped for a moment trying to control the volume of her voice, "If Tanya hadn't of gotten away she wouldn't have had the chance to go to the Volturi asking for protection then Aro wouldn't have seen anything about you. I don't know what that will do to him if he finds out Bella…what that would do to the family."

That was the piece of the puzzle I never had the chance to put together. The whole Volturi experience was so frightening I blocked it out of my mind once it was over. The after effects I could deal with but that didn't mean I wanted to think about it.

"So what do you want me to do Rosalie? It's not like I can walk around with my shield on everyone. I don't even know if I can use it again."

Rosalie's hands shot across the table and grabbed mine. She jerked me so that I ended up looking her dead in the eye. "I want you to tell Edward that you won't go through with it. You shouldn't anyway. This is no way to…be…and you have to consider there may be a better life for you out there. One that doesn't involve us…one where you just get to be human."

I jerked my hands away from her at. Wasn't it her that convinced Edward to come back to me? And now she was asking me to leave him again?

"In case you hadn't realized it yet I kind of have no choice. If I'm not changed by the end of the summer then the Volturi will come after you…they'll come after me…after Charlie and Renee. I have to do this. I have to protect my family. All of them. And I'm not leaving Edward. I can't be apart from him again."

I got up from the table intent on leaving but she pulled me back into the seat. "You're going to leave him anyway…so why not do it and keep your life. We'll figure out some way to deal with the Volturi but I can't let you do this. Think of Edward. Think of how he'll feel when he finds out this whole thing could have been avoided if only I hadn't let her get away."

I narrowed my eyes at her. This wasn't really about me staying human…or about Edward's feelings. This was about him not being mad at her. This was about her.

"Rosalie, the depth of your selfishness astounds me sometimes. I'm not going to endanger the lives of everyone I love just so Edward won't be mad at you. When and if he finds out we'll deal with it. Until then, if you can't be supportive…then don't speak to me at all. I have enough guilt wearing down my shoulders. I don't need to wear yours too!"

I threw my napkin down and got up from the table. She didn't follow, just crossed her arms over her chest with a sourpuss look on her face staring out the window. There was too much for me to deal with this weekend and I felt like I was swimming sharks. The bad dreams were starting to get to me and I didn't know who to talk to about them. If I tried to talk to Edward that would just give him more of a reason to talk me out of it and Alice would just tell me I was being silly. I wasn't being silly. I was frightened and desperately wanted to get my mind off of things, so I did the only thing I could think of…I called Jacob.

Jake and I drove out to the pier in Port Angeles and walked watching people board the ferry.

"So I haven't seen or heard very much from you in the last month," Jacob started when I was silent for too long.

"Sorry…finals…you know how that is."

"Yea…I guess." He shrugged then turned me to face him. "Is everything okay Bella? You're kind of out it…kind of like before when the bloodsuck…er..I mean um Edward bailed."

I suddenly found myself gasping for breath. Even after all this time just thinking about that still hurt and here I found myself in the same place…Edward gone and me not knowing where he was. Hadn't it occurred to him…to anyone that that's what this would feel like to me?

"Hey…Bella… are you alright? You're looking kind of green."

"Yes….I'm fine Jacob." I took a deep breath trying to compose myself. Jacob was easy to talk to. Easier than Edward in some ways and if I started to vent I may ended up saying too much. I wasn't ready to tell him about the Volturi's decision…didn't want to if I didn't have to. Once I left I was sure he'd figure it out on his own and by then it would be too late.

"You don't look fine…what's going on Bells. You know you can talk to me about anything." Jacob grabbed my hand pulling me under his arm and hugged me tightly. My arms wrapped themselves around his waist and suddenly I was crying. Not violent crying…just tears and sadness pouring out of me while Jacob rubbed my back.

"Now that you've succeeded in soaking my shirt you _are_ going to tell me what's going on. Or am I going to have to get you drunk again?"

"No, no alcohol though it would help with nightmares." I laughed and used the end of his shirt to wipe my eyes. "I'm just a little stressed is all and Edward's gone…he left for the weekend and no one wants to tell me where he went."

"I'm surprised he didn't leave sooner…weren't any of them afraid we'd retaliate for the whole Sam situation?"

So much for getting my mind off things… I hadn't expected him to bring that up. It was him that warned us that Sam might be plotting something in first place. Why would he care?

"No…Why would they? Sam attacked us. You'd have no reason to go after the Cullens." I narrowed my eyes at him and moved away putting some space between us. If he was about to tell me he planned to go after Edward I'd need the room to swing my punch.

"The fact that they are even here is reason enough but we made a deal and unlike Sam I'm going to stick to it…unless they give me a reason to do otherwise."

I could see the darkness pass quickly over his face. I knew what he meant….what it would mean if I was changed while I was still in Forks and that was trouble I was going to do my best to avoid. Jacob's expression was strained and I reached out to grab his hand but he pulled it away. The past month had been an emotional roller coaster for me with Edward and my impending separation and in all that time it hadn't occurred to me once to find out what had happened to Sam. Frankly, I hadn't really cared.

"Well what about Sam? Are you just going to let him off the hook even though he was trying to offer me up as a sacrifice?"

"Sam is suffering enough, believe me."

"How?" I asked incredulously. He was still alive and as far as I knew no serious damage had been done.

"Sam can't phase and we don't know if he'll ever be able to again. I've had to take over the whole pack and let me tell you…no one is happy that I'm here right now…they feel like I'm a traitor. Do you have any idea what that's like…being the head when no one trusts you?"

My eyes narrowed for a second. It was no secret that Jacob hadn't wanted to be a pack leader at all so I got this distinct feeling that he wasn't upset because of what happened to Sam but because of the responsibility he had to take over.

"Am I the only one that's not being a selfish brat around here," I mumbled to myself.

"What are you talking about? I'm not being selfish Bella…I'm being pissed. It seems like my whole life's ended on account of the whole wolf thing. I had plans…finish college…get a job…get married. And now look at me…I'm going to remain this way…this age….frozen like your blood suckers until the threat is gone and I can control the phasing enough to not do it anymore. It wasn't like I asked for this and it isn't like I want it, so who's being selfish? Me for being upset about having all this dumped on me…or you for embracing what they are…for what they were able to do to me?"

As I stared into Jacob's eyes in that moment I felt like I wanted to crumble and be washed away in the tide. He was hurting worse than I was. He hadn't chosen this life and I was choosing that life that had ruined his. I could feel myself about to burst into tears, could feel my teeth chattering and a cold sweat breaking out on my skin but then the faces of everyone I loved flashed behind my closed eyes and I felt my conviction grounding me. I was doing this to protect the ones I loved, even Jake, though I know he wouldn't see it that way. Getting to spend eternity with Edward was just a bonus…that was if he was willing to have me.

"Jacob…I'm sorry," was all I could managed to say before forcing him into my arms and holding him for what seemed like forever. Such was our relationship that the anger passed quickly and we spent the rest of the day hanging out and being us; Jacob and Bella not the unwilling werewolf and the soon to be vampire.

By the time Alice picked me up from the treaty line I was exhausted but stayed up long enough to help her get things set up for the party. Rosalie made it a point to let everyone know she was upset with me but I ignored her. I had too many more important things to think about, like the fact that I still hadn't heard from Edward and the fact that even though tomorrow was supposed to be all about fun it signified something else to me.

To me it was the beginning of the end of my life. After the party I'd have to start saying my goodbyes. After the party I'd have to start mentally preparing myself for three days of excruciating pain and lord knows how many years of uncontrollable bloodlust. By the end of the summer I'd have to face the Volturi again and who knew if I'd even live through that. The worst thought of all was…I didn't know if I'd have Edward by my side through any of it.

Needless to say I had another sleepless night, tossing and turning and burying my face in Edward's pillow for comfort. I even went so far as to wearing one of his shirts but nothing worked. Finally around five I gave up, made myself breakfast, and crawled back into bed listening to one of the cd's he'd made me. I missed him and it was driving me nuts that his phone was turned off and he wouldn't call. I started to worry that my behavior for the last month had driven him away. I could feel how much my silence was hurting him but I didn't know how else to prepare us for a separation. In truth I was hoping that he'd just change his mind.

"You're driving Jasper nuts!" Alice screamed, busting through the door, and startling me so badly that I fell off the bed. "Quit moping around and go talk to Charlie already! Edward will be back later today and all will be right in the world again."

"If only that were the only reason I was moping," I mumbled picking myself up off the floor.

"Today is a day to be happy Bella. Trust me." Her smile stretched from ear to ear as she patted the rollers in her hair. She danced on her toes out of the room. I could hear her talking to Jasper in the hall, their lips smacking together for what should have been a peck on the mouth but quickly turned to more. It made me want to gag but I didn't want her to know I was jealous so I just left.

I still hadn't talk to Charlie about my moving back home for awhile and I figured I might as well do it now instead of surprising him. He didn't like surprises anymore than I did. As I was pulling up to the block just around the corner from home I saw Edward's Volvo speeding past me in the opposite direction. My heart nearly jumped out of my chest and I skidded on the breaks until my car stopped and hopped out.

He'd of known that I was close. He always knew when I was close…he could always hear my heartbeat. I pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration and sighed trying to calm myself but I couldn't of course, so I left my truck where it was and practically ran around the corner to the house. Charlie was outside washing the cruiser when I sprinted up. He looked at me, smiled, and then sprayed me with hose.

"What's up kid?" he asked while I screamed and tried to shield my face.

"Dad! Stop!" I shrieked swatting at the water. Charlie just shrugged his shoulders and smirked.

"Alice is throwing this big graduation party tonight and well…I kind of wanted to talk to you about something beforehand." I walked closer with my hands up in case he tried to spray me again.

Charlie nodded at me, the hint of a smile still on his face while he sprayed down the cruiser. "Sure thing. Why don't you get us some drinks and meet me on the back porch." He turned away from me…whistling. Whistling!

A few minutes later Charlie met me on the back porch, sitting on the swing next to me and put his arm around my shoulder.

"We haven't done this since you were a kid," he said hugging me.

"I know. I'm sorry dad…for the way things have gone."

"Don't worry about it Bells. You're in good hands. I know you're being taken care of. And it's not like I never see you."

My stomach did a back flip when he said that. I tried to steady my breathing…keep from crying but the tears turned my vision all hazy and I turned my face into his side. He didn't say anything, just wrapped his arms around me and put his chin on the top of my head holding me until I contained myself.

This being an emotional wreck was getting kind of old to me. How was I ever going to convince Edward that I was okay with my decision if I couldn't stop crying about it?

"Dad…what was Edward doing here earlier," I asked when I could speak clearly. I felt Charlie shrug his shoulders.

"He called me from the airport and said he wanted to stop by on his way home. We had a nice lunch and talked."

I bolted out of his arms staring at him with a look of disbelief on my face. "You ate together?"

"Yea…and I gotta tell you the boy eats like a bird. You would think with the size of his brothers he'd be as big as them but now I see why he's not." Charlie laughed and shook his head. It suddenly dawned on me why he'd sped past me the way he did. The few times I'd seen him actually eat…well let's just say he can't keep food down for very long. I took a long deep breath and relaxed a little. At least I knew he wasn't avoiding me.

"Well what did he want to talk about?"

"Nothing in particular. Just shooting the breeze like he's done every other time."

"Every other time?"

"Edward's been here quite a few times this past month. Funny, I thought you knew."

"No," I answered mechanically. "I didn't. I have no idea what he up to. If you know you should tell me. You know I hate surprises."

Charlie laughed and squeezed my knee. "All surprises aren't bad…some but not all. Remember that."

We chuckled together for a few moments before it turned into a comfortable silence. It was nice while it lasted but then Charlie had to go and remind me what I came to talk to him about.

"Um…yea…I want to come home for a little while…you know before I leave."

"I'd like that, Bells." And then he hugged me…tightly and I could hear him sniffling and figured he'd probably hugged me so long so I wouldn't see him crying, which was fine. I don't think I could have held it together seeing Charlie cry.

We sat for a little while longer before it started getting dark and I had to get dressed. Sitting in the middle of my bed was a small gold gift bag with a tag hanging from it that had my name on it. Edward's scent was all over it. Laying beneath and absurd amount of green, gold, and black tissue paper was a small blue velvet pouch. I groaned at the thought of what was in it. No doubt something expensive. Something that cost more than my entire wardrobe pre-Alice.

I opened the pouch and didn't know whether to smile or scowl. It was a pair of diamond and sapphire drop earrings. They were beautiful but I didn't want gifts…I wanted just wanted to see him. I dressed with slow deliberate movements, mentally preparing myself for the show I was going to have to put on and the verbal ass kicking I was going to give Edward for adding stress to this already almost unbearable time.

Charlie insisted the last place he wanted to spend his evening was in a house full of horny teenagers, forcing me to face the entrance alone. To say that Alice had outdone herself would be an understatement. Had I not been living in that house for months I wouldn't have recognized it. The place was completely transformed to look like a New York City lounge. Music poured out of speakers that were set up throughout the first floor and the bass made the floor vibrate beneath my feet.

The house was already packed with bodies. I had the feeling that more than the senior class had showed up as I tried to squeeze my way to the stairs where Alice was talking with two of our classmates. She smiled when our eyes met and excused herself, coming down to meet me.

"What took you so long? I was about to send Jasper to go get you." Alice smiled, pulling me by my hand into less-crowded kitchen.

"I'm sorry," I said craning my neck looking for Edward. Alice turned me by my chin back to look at her.

"Happy face Bella. Happy face. This will all be over in a few hours and then you and Edward can talk."

"Speaking of Edward…where is he?"

"He's outside socializing which is exactly what you're about to do." She led me into the living room which was packed with all of our "friends." I could see Angela and Ben dancing in the corner. Mike and Jessica were there too with Lauren which surprised me. I still hadn't forgotten or forgiven him for what he'd done but didn't dwell on it. He hadn't bothered me the entire senior year and I heard he stopped drinking too.

For a while I just made my rounds talking to people but the whole time my palms were sweating and my heart was beating out of my chest. To be so close but kept from him was torture. I saw my one chance to escape outside when Alice was uh…preoccupied with Japer's dental inspection on the dance floor but no sooner than I turned to make my run for it did she spring up beside me and stopped me from going out.

"No so fast there my friend," she said sternly wagging a finger at me. For a moment I considered trying to break it off.

"Why are you keeping us apart Alice? This doesn't make any sense!" I half yelled had whined at her. I could feel him…feel that he was close and it was killing me that she wouldn't even let me near the windows to see him.

"Because Bella…this is a party…for you. And being that you haven't seen Edward in a few days I know that you will spend the whole night up his butt and there other people you need to see…other people you need to say goodbye to. Besides Edward is being kept away from you too…you should hear the stink he's putting up out there."

Well at least that was a comforting thought. At least I knew he wanted to see me. I fingered the earrings and nodded at her but I was still sulking. I still wanted to see him and it was still pissing me off to be kept from him. I gave my best effort to have fun, monopolizing my time with actual friends but when people I barely knew started thanking me for invitations, telling me that they'd miss me when we were all off to college I started to get worn out and drifted towards the windows hoping to catch a glimpse of him outside. Emmett and Rose were out there talking to people but I didn't see Edward. He wasn't anywhere in sight so I closed my eyes and rested my forehead against the glass as I'd seen him do a million times when I felt the someone step up behind me.

The clutch on my lungs finally gave way and I closed my eyes taking deep breaths as Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and pressed against me. I nearly melted into him, covering his hands with mine and leaned back against him.

"So how much trouble am I in?" He breathed into my hair and I shivered, reaching up to wrap my arms around his neck to pull him closer.

"Tons, but I'll rip you a new one later. Right now I'm just glad you're back. Edward I…"

"Bella, I missed the hell out of you." He spun me quickly in arms, kissed me hard pulling me up off the floor, and sandwiched me between him in the glass. I wanted to climb into his skin, forgetting momentarily where we were, and wrapped my legs around his waist. Edward's hands gripped my ass firmly as the sweet dizziness that I had craved like a heroin addict was starting to take over but Edward didn't stop. He kissed me until he knew he couldn't anymore and even after he kept his lips on mine as she slowly lowered me to my feet. His hands followed the curves of my body, not helping with me trying to regain my composure, only making me want to kiss him more.

"Safe to say you aren't angry with me anymore?" I could hear the laughter in his voice and for a moment wanted to kick him in the shin, but only because he was right. I looked up into his eyes and completely forgot whatever snarky come back I had. His golden eyes were smoldering and his smile breath-taking, so much so that, for a moment I forgot how to breathe.

Edward pulled me away from the windows, jumpstarting my lungs, and danced me into the center of the room. I forgot to be embarrassed, upset, or question him. He was smiling at me, our bodies moving to the rhythm of whatever party song was playing, and nothing else seemed to matter.

From the corner of my eye I saw Alice nod at us from and looked up quickly to see Edward nodding back at her. The lighting in the room changed from the techno-colors that it had been all night to this low romantic lighting. From the speakers came a slow and steady beat of drums followed by the twinkling of piano keys. I looked up at Edward confused by what was going on…by the sudden change in the atmosphere in the room but he just pulled me close to and leaned down to my ear.

"I heard this song a few days ago. It made me think of you…of what I've wanted to say to you all month but just couldn't find the right words," he said in a hushed whisper.

"Edward .."

"Shhh Bella. Just listen. Really listen okay."

And listen I did as the singer's voice told a story…and oddly familiar story while Edward swayed our bodies slowly side to side. The words "Would you like to leave this human race tonight?" were sung and I was hit, blindsided by what he was trying to say when suddenly his lips were at my ear and he was singing along with the song.

"Eternity will never be enough for me…and eternally we'll live our infallible love."

I gasped about to speak but was silenced by his sweet lips again. As the tears poured from my eyes we kissed out the rest of the song, completely oblivious to everything that was going on around the room.

**EPoV**

Bella's lips molded over mine, her tears pouring between us but from the way she was clutching on to me I knew she got it. I knew she understood what I was trying to say with the song.

Once the song went off Bella's lips were still on mine but we weren't kissing anymore. Her fingers were curled into my hair and she just held me there, slowly catching her breath. The Dj quickly whipped the ambiance back into party mode and I smiled into my loves lips before spinning her away and then back into my arms. She laughed her beautiful heart melting laugh, smile at me, then wrapped her arm around my waist pulling me from the dance floor. Alice winked at me from across the room where she was standing with Jasper, Emmett, and rose, all of them with knowing looks on their faces.

I'd wanted to wait until the party was over but, on looking at her face and seeing the smile there, I knew it was time. I danced on my feet out the back door and made our way through the crowd of people that littered my backyard. Everything was set up at the creek just as I'd requested. The blanket from our first night here. The small radio playing the soft music and not a person anywhere in sight. The moon was high, casting its blue light over our little spot of heaven, and I sank onto the blanket watching Bella kick off her shoes to stick her toes in the water.

"Are you going to tell me where you went now? I've been going crazy without you these past two days." She turned back to me with tears glistening in her eyes and I felt a pang of guilt. Maybe I hadn't made the best choice leaving the way I did but it was partly to prove a point. Bella was stubborn and sometimes had to learn the hard way.

"I'm sorry I didn't say anything but I didn't want you to ask questions. I knew you'd make a fuss about me leaving so I thought it was best to just go and do what I had to do so that I wouldn't have to lie to you," I answered quietly, pulling her slightly trembling body down to my side, and sweeping her hair behind her ear so she couldn't hide her face from me.

Bella pulled my hand up to her cheek, leaning into it with her eyes closed then opened them slowly but I could still see the tears she was trying to hide.

"That's understandable I guess. So where did you go?"

"Chicago."

Her eyes widened a bit at me going back to my home town. She knew that place held to many memories and too much pain for me. Chicago was where I had buried and left my parents. Chicago was where I had ripped angrily through the city- a predator of the night- during my rebellious years.

"Are you okay?" Her hands were suddenly on my face comforting me with her warmth.

"After all this time I would have thought it would be easier to go there but it wasn't as easy as I thought. But I felt I needed to go there and…tell them about you…ask for their blessing."

"I'm sure you're parents would bless you wherever you were Edward. You didn't need to put yourself through all of that."

"True…but it just felt like something I needed to do." She kissed me softly assuaging the pain that started to build in my chest. I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her closer to me, and letting her drumming heart beat the rest out. Our eyes met then our lips. I lost my train of thought kissing her as my lips traveled from her sweet mouth to her neck. Her pants and sighs were always so deliciously distracting.

"So…are you going to tell me why you went to Charlie's today? Why you actually ate food with him?" she asked when we finally came up for air.

"It seemed the right thing to do. The talking to Charlie part not the eating part. That I paid for. Trust me." We both chuckled and Bella leaned forward to rest her forehead against my shoulder then wrapped her arms around my neck pulling herself closer.

"So you're really okay with this now…with what I'm doing?"

I nodded against her face giving her a reassuring squeeze. "I'm more than okay with it. I actually want it. Have wanted it, really, for a long time but I thought I was being selfish. To take your life just so I'll never have to be without you is the most selfish thing I could ever do."

"I don't think it selfish Edward. I'd of given up my life for you a long time ago. Once I had you there really wasn't any other option for me …and it wasn't just because of the danger we've gone through…but because I love you that much. I can't be without you."

"Thus the other reason why I left and sort of stayed away. I wanted to know…and what you to know what it would feel like to be apart…the way you were willing to do it. My life is hell without you Bella. Consider that a failed experiment because I can't be without you either."

Bella stared at me wide-eyed for a moment then sucked her teeth as if she were about to berate me then changed her mind. She kissed me, with an attitude at first but when I snaked my arm around her back and started to lean back, she gave up, giving into me, and let her body weight push us both down to the ground. I was about to give way to her passion when the real reason for my bringing her out here jumped forefront in mind, that and the fact that with her turning to straddle my waist her knee was about to bump into not only me bulging out of pants.

"Bella wait," I panted out pushing her away. Her chest was heaving the way it always does when she's trying to catch her and I pulled her up to her feet trying to put a little space between us so I wouldn't just say to hell with my plan and rip all her clothes off like I wanted to.

The moonlight reflected off the water and hit her face in a way that took my breath away. With her paleness it was just a glimmer of the way she would look when she was finally like me. I curled my fingers into hair and kissed her lips softly, slowly so we didn't get all work up again when I felt the earring against the palm of my hand. I pulled away, pulling her hair back, and smiled.

"What?"

"You're wearing the earrings. I didn't know if you would but I hoped for it. As expected they look just as beautiful as you as they did on the original owner."

"The original owner?"

"These earrings were my mother's Bella. It was one of the reasons I had to go back to Chicago. There were a few things that were placed in a safety deposit box that I had to retrieve."

Bella smiled, fingering the earrings and then leaned up on her toes to kiss me again. "Thank you Edward. I'm honored to wear them. They're beautiful. I'll cherish them for all eternity." She wrapped her arms around my waist hugging me and leaned back to smile up at me. "You said a few things, what else did you get?"

I couldn't have set it up any better if I had given her a script.

"This ring." I held up my hand so she could see my father's Masen ring on my finger. She reached up pulling my hand closer to her face so she could see it better leaving my other hand free to reach into my pocket and grab a hold of the velvet box.

"And this one," I whispered, slowly I dropping down to one knee, and presented the ring box open in the palm of my hand. Her heart immediately went into over drive and she sort of swayed back on her feet as her eyes moved from the ring to my face.

"I wanted to do this right...so I went to my parents and asked for their blessing. And then I went to your father and asked for his. It wasn't easy, let me tell you…but when I explained to him…how much I loved you," emphasis was placed unconsciously on the love…as if my just saying it wouldn't have been enough…as if she needed to feel the depth of my words.

"From the moment I laid eyes on you I was irrevocably changed. You have brought out the part of me that I never knew I had. You have had more trust and faith in me than I had in myself. You make me want to be a better…no... the best person that I can possibly be."

I had to stop for a moment. I was getting choked up trying to find the right words. Bella was shaking as I reached up and placed the ring on the tip of her finger. I looked up into her beautiful brown eyes that were glossy with her tears and saw my heaven…my own personal heaven looking down at me. The words sprang into my head and flowed out of my mouth without my even having to think about them.

"Isabella Swan…I **will **love you every single moment of forever. Will you…grant me the blessed eternity of being my wife?"

The tears burned in my eyes as I waited for her answer.

A second passed.

Two.

Three.

And then through her tears I heard her answer. "Yes…oh God yes Edward."

In the next second the ring was firmly on her finger and I was standing with her in my arms. She crushed her lips to mine curling her fingers into my hair, kissing me with every ounce of strength in her small body.

I was the one to sway on my feet now, so overcome with emotion. My knees wobbled and we sank to the ground with our legs tangled together. Bella lay on top of me, kissing all over my face and down my neck while I ran my hands up her back and pushed her shirt over her shoulders.

I moaned when I felt her hands slide underneath my shirt over the muscles of my stomach to my chest. She leaned back, pushing my shirt up and then I felt her mouth again, this time where her hands had just been. Her lips were hot and full. With every landing my body shivered beneath her. Slowly I ran my hands up her thighs hooking my thumbs in the waist of her pants. Meaning to pull them down I just ended up pulling them sideways and she spoke into my skin, "Just tear them off!" So I did. In one fluid motion I tore them apart and flipped her over so that she was on her back and I was hovering above her.

Her hands found my face and she placed her palms on my cheeks drawing me in for a kiss. I pressed my lips firmly to hers, following with my body which she wrapped her legs tightly around my waist. Bella's lips parted, inviting me in, making melt into her when my tongue wrapped around hers inside her mouth. She danced with me for a moment before for letting me take control. I moved my lips from her mouth to her neck, stopping there to inhale her fragrance before resuming my travels south. Her thighs quivered around me, her heat pressing against me, breaking my concentration of my slow decent down to the smooth skin of her stomach.

I stopped, staring into her eyes. The love that overflowed in them always overwhelmed and I leaned back trying to catch my bearings. My swept my fingers lightly over the dark spots on her thighs, mentally kicking myself for my loss of control when she grabbed my hand and pulled it to her heart.

"Apologize later if you must but celebrate with me now. We're getting married Edward…and soon…you won't have to worry about these anymore."

"There…you did it again. Made me feel better without me telling you what was wrong." I smiled shyly at her, feeling sort of embarrassed. I imagined it silver of how my family felt around me.

"There a simple reason for that. We were made for each other."

She said it so matter-of-factly that it made is both smile. The smile turned into a soft kiss, that turned into a deeper kiss, that turned into us whimpering with need into each other's mouths. Holding onto her hips I worked my lips back down, stopping to lavish each of her breast with my mouth and tongue. She squirmed beneath me, panting and sighing, pulling me closer and running her hot hands all over my body until I couldn't take it anymore. I pressed my lips to hers again, guiding her hand, wanting her touch me.

Bella ripped the buttons of my pants open and yanked them down with such ferocity it made us both laugh.

Bella pushed my pants over my hips, and then slowly ran her hands up my backside slowly, while grating her teeth across my bottom lip. One of her hands moved in between us, sliding along the length of me, making my eyes roll in that back of my head from how good her hands felt. Bella's breathing was ragged as she worked her hands on me. Her soft thighs moved over mine as I moved myself in her hand, mimicking how it felt to be inside her.

"I love you…so much Bella," I whispered in her ear as I pulled myself from her grasp and slid up between her legs.

"I love you more than my human heart can bear," she whispered back placing her hands at the small of my back. We stared into each other eyes for a moment, mirror images of love burning in both before I slid with comforting ease into her. I watched her face contort with ecstasy, holding back my own urge to close my eyes and lose myself in her body.

Bella wrapped her arms around me, holding herself tightly to me as I rolled us over so she was on top. She kept her body flushed with mine, moving slowly over me and letting my feel every inch of her skin, her soft breast sliding over my chest. She was beautiful and though I wouldn't have thought it was possible if I hadn't seen it myself, would be more beautiful in the matter of a few weeks. Where this thought would have normally filled me with guilt it now filled me with joy as our bodies slowly swayed to Sia's "My love" that was playing above our head.

I craned my head back, letting our a growl…a moan…her name… before I felt the heat rising in her body. She pulled my face back to hers, kissing me before leaning away and placing my hands on her hips so that I could work her into a fit of ecstasy.

I pushed myself up, supporting my weight one hand and Bella with the other as our hips rocked faster together. She was moaning loudly now, clutching my hair in her hands and panting out my name. Pressing my lips to her skin, I thrust harder, the coils in my stomach were knotting, the tension building throughout my body screaming for release and with in seconds we were both crying out.

With heaving chest we collapsed against each other. I rubbed Bella's back trying to soothe her racing heart and she ran her hands along my sides calming me before slipping to and cradling herself in my arms. We lay there, wrapped in each others arms. I listened to Bella's breath even out, filtering the sounds of the party ending back at the house. Emmett was arguing with Alice about setting off fireworks over our heads, but she threatened to rip his arm off is he did.

I laughed, causing Bella's naked body to slide against my arm. The sensation traveled in waves through my body, springing me to life, and she laughed pressing one hand against me and used the other to turn my face to hers.

"Very soon I'll have as much stamina as you," she murmured with her lips pressed to mine.

"When you're ready…and not a moment before."

I meant what I said but when Bella pulled my waist, turning me on my side to face her, and pulled her body flush with mine, burying my face in her neck I hoped she wouldn't make me wait too much longer.

* * *

**A/N**** And dont you worry because you wont have to wait much longer for the sequel to start... I've got so many crazy Ideas going through my head...I mean think about it...**

**Bella still has to be changed...They still have to go to Volterra...Guys this was only the beginning...The end has yet to come!**

**Thanks again to everyone who stuck with me. I love you I love you I love you...Look out for the sequel!  
**


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